"People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone." - Audrey Hepburn
I came to this site for advice about a man and love. That very question turned my entire world around and I have had my eyes opened to things I never noticed before.
I've stayed here so that I can share the knowledge I do have. I know I'm not changing the world but I do hope that I spark others to open their eyes.
"The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself." - Oscar Wilde
So, if you learn something from what I say then repeat it to someone else who can use it.
I hope that if you see an answer of mine that you enjoy it will inspire you to go out of your way to give good, solid information. Provide links for further information, detail your responses, encourage people to seek out professionals when it's needed, and stop sugar-coating responses and just say the truth.
I hope that even if you absolutely hate my answer that it'll kick start your brain. Hopefully you'll begin taking your time to respond instead of hurried answers that are useless to an already confused person.
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost
Gender: Female Location: WV / KY / ND Occupation: Technical Account Management Age: 24 Member Since: October 12, 2007 Answers: 1511 Last Update: August 15, 2011 Visitors: 144180
Favorite Columnists karenR DangerNerd russianspy1234 GilbertMar ThirdQED mikesadvice Eldritch my2cents
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Hi! I was talking to my best friend one day and she said she was heading to McDonald's. I asked her what she gets there and she said she usually gets a McGangBang to eat and the Mickey D's sweet tea to drink. I didn't want to sound stupid so I went with the conversation and didn't ask, "What in the WORLD is a McGangBang?!"
I'm pretty sure McDonald's doesn't have that on their menus but I don't know what it might be. My friend isn't nasty and doesn't participate in gangbangs or anything so I KNOW it isn't dirty or some weird sexual thing. What is a McGangBang so the next time my friends talk about it I will have a better idea of what it is?
THANKS!!! (link)
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The McGangbang is, most definately, not on the McDonald's menu--but the "ingredients" are!
First, you purchase the McDouble from the Value Menu (usually $1 or $1.25).
Next, purchase the Hot & Spicy McChicken, also from the McDonald's Value Menu (usually $1 or $1.25).
If the McDonald's you are at does NOT offer teh Spicy McChicken from their Value Menu then no fear! Just order the plain, regular McChicken sandwhich.
When you receive the sandwiches, open up the McDouble so that one hamburger patty is on one side and the other patty is on the other side. Take your McChicken (remove bun for size issues if you do have a small mouth) and put it in between. Put both halves of the McDouble sandwich over the McChicken sandwich and BOOM! You just made a McGangBang...
Two pieces of meat with a [hot] chick in the middle!
Haha.
What does the McGangbang sandwich look like?:
http://www.eatmedaily.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/mcgangbang.jpg
or, for a drawing of the McGangbang for a more detailed idea:
http://pantsnotfound.com/files/mcgangbang-600.png
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How likely is pregnancy from precum? (link)
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Pre-ejaculate still contains some sperm, even though it's a lot less than a complete ejaculation. A full ejaculation contains as many as 100 million sperm at a time, and sperm within pre-ejaculate can be as many as a few million.
It only takes ONE to get you pregnant.
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my boyfriend and i had sex without any protection for the first time.. He didnt cum in me, but we suspect pre-cum did.. Can i get pregnant over pre-cum? Or is it 110% unlikely? Thank you. (link)
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Pre-ejaculate still contains some sperm, even though it's a lot less than a complete ejaculation. A full ejaculation contains as many as 100 million sperm at a time, and sperm within pre-ejaculate can be as many as a few million.
It only takes ONE to get you pregnant.
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today in school people were sayin that chris pontius died in a car crash....is this true ?? :/ (link)
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No, he is alive. There are lots of rumors going around about Chris Pontius but he is still alive, I assure you.
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I'm a woman. Sexually, I prefer men. I'm 24;I just finished my bachelor's degree and began my career. The problem is that I'm madly in love (for about four years now) with an old professor (and literally old--30 years older to be exact) of mine and I live in an extremely small town. Well, I never wanted to jeopardize either of our careers, so I never told him or anyone else during college. A few months after I graduated I called him (at his home--to keep it personal) to ask him out for dinner (but I never literally said that it would be a date and he dines and meets with students (on a platonic level) fairly often). Well, he said that was a tough question for him and that it was probably a better idea to keep things "business". I was a little taken aback because I never said it would be a date and I didn't think I had ever been forward with him. I have always tried to respect his space and his intentions and feelings. (The strangest thing of all is that we have shared several meals together, both with others and some alone together.) So, I apologized for creating an awkward situation and ended the call. Since then, one of my friends (an old student) and an old female professor (his close colleague and a past research partner of mine) have both stated that he told them about the phone call and seemed to boast the fact that he was "flattered". Also, he has made some efforts to try to communicate with me (whether it be in person (once) or through others (often)) to try to tell me that everything is ok and I don't have to feel awkward around him. The strange thing is that when I tell some of my friends the more intricate details of this story (and also try to dissect his words and actions to see if he is really being truthful with such statements), they all seem to wonder if the feelings are actually mutual (in other words, may the love be shared?). You see, this man has never been married or had children, and he has always been vehemently opposed to marriage and relationships (because he mainly finds them draining and emotionally painful). He has boasted about the joys of being a single man without a partner to "tell him what to do," yet on the other hand, he has expressed pain regarding his loneliness, referring to himself as "damaged goods" and telling me and a few others that failed relationships were a result of his inability to compromise, fear, etc. It is probably not surprising to you that others find his behavior incomprehensible and somewhat kooky.
I'm not sure if I really have a question or not. I just need a second opinion. All of my close friends are also either a friend or student of his, or an acquaintance of his. This town is so small and I often wonder if I am being mocked when asked about my feelings by others. I don't think they understand how someone so young could love someone so much older, but that is the least of my concerns here (as I have dated older men before and am quite open to anyone as long as a strong connection is present). And that is just the thing about all of this--this is not some simple connection. No one has ever demanded so much of my attention (in my own mind that is). I can't get my mind off of him. Perhaps I am obsessed. Perhaps I'm crazy. Perhaps I really am just the town nutso. I don't think so though, and many claim to agree that it is normal.
What do you think about all of this? Am I a weirdo? Should I give up? Or is he the crazy one? (link)
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Being attracted to an older man is, by far, strange. My husband is a good 16 years older than me and we have a terrific, healthy relationship. Many people give us strange looks but the key is the ability to make it work and to push through all of the nonsense that comes with such an age difference. Being attracted to a wiser, older man is far from being part of bad judgement.
At this point it seems that the man may have feelings for you as well but neither of us can say that in certainty. We both know that he has expressed such emotions that lead in that direction but has not specifically said you were attractive in any state for him.
That being said, you must find out if you wish to persue anything more than a friendship.
Calling someone to ask them out to lunch or dinner does not have to be a romantic evening. Call him, again, and ask to go out for a friendly evening at a local resturaunt. Let him know that his company is enjoyed and that is the reason you are calling. If you must, specifically state that there are no romantic attachments with this outing.
Have a nice dinner with the man. See about scheduling another one sometime. Talk about all of the things you two enjoy discussing during the dinner and then leave it with your question. Ask him if he might have any further interest in you.
There might be a very good reason why the man has never been married. There really might be something "damaged" about him that he has not disclosed to you. He may feel he is incapable of love, which would cause great problems in building a romantic relationship with him.
If you do not ask he probably will not tell. If he enjoys boasting about you calling him and asking about dinner then he is probably interested or feels that other people would envy him. It's highly doubtful he is making a mockery of the situation or you. It's highly doubtful he will just come out and say he is interested in you though.
So, give it another shot and pick up the phone. Keep things friendly and away from romance until the time is right at the end of the evening. Ensure he has your phone number (refresh his memory if he has forgotten without becoming irritated or disappointed) and consider calling him every so often to "just say hi!" if he seems accepting of that behavior.
If he says that he is disinterested in the idea of a romantic relationship between you two then you probably will want to leave the man alone from there (but leaving on friendly terms, of course). If your town is as small as you claim it to be then you persuing him may cause some ruckus within the community. Remember to be smart and don't push anything too far or too suddenly if he feels you two might be more compatible than previously mentioned.
Get to know him more personally during your talk(s) and try to understand his desire to be single. He may truly enjoy the single life or may be putting on a "show" for others so that they do not feel sorry for him. Keep in mind that there is a reason why his previous relationships failed before they got "too" serious and try to make some conclusions about that for your own personal good.
I don't see anything wrong with you trying to persue this at the moment, and it sounds as if he would enjoy that as well. The worst that can happen is that he says, "NO!" and that can, most definately, be dealt with at this point.
I hope things go well and he enjoys a nice dinner with you soon! :) If you have any more questions please feel free to ask me!
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I met my ex bf when I was 19 & he was 20. He went to an away college after us being together for 2 months. He was head over heels for me & would have asked to marry me within a year. I thought I loved him but I didn't because I cheated on him 3 months into our relationship. He came back for the weekend to visit & found out from one of my ex friends that I cheated. He asked me, I lied and said NO. He talked to my ex friend and then came to my work and asked again, I lied through my teeth. He finally had had enough and broke up with me and I admitted to it (October). I do know why I cheated. He went back to school. A couple weeks later we tried to be together again. (i was now 20, him 20) We broke up at the end of December because I wasn't doing everything to show him that he could trust me again. We somehow started dating again in the beginning of January. I saw him during Spring Break which was in March for a week. Then end of March, early April we both called it off. Neither of us could do it. I drove down to see him because I realized I didn't want to lose him. He told me, he didn't want to be with me and had moved on. (me 20, him 21) In June he came back home. We started dating again. Sometime in June or July, he went to the phone store, met a girl, had a good 1 to 2hr conversation and exchanged numbers with her. Told me about it a day later, I freaked, told him never to talk to her. Then his sister was trying to hook him up w some girl she knew (his sister knew we were dating but doesn't like me). I found out because I was leaving out of town in August, we were spending time together & I saw the text so he explained. I was iffy about leaving for a month with all this going on. He went to vegas with a couple guys & went to his sisters bday dinner & club with her friends. I came back & things were going alright. I was texting a guy friend I met when we were broken up but he knew I had a bf & he had no possiblity of dating me because he knew how much my bf meant to me (ill call him tim). Then one day, out of the blue, I got a 1am text from a guy I met when my bf & I were broken up in April. I texted both of those guys and one more, telling them I want nothing to do with them anymore because I love my bf and I will do anything for him. In December, he told me he finally trusted me. End of December, he told me he didn't trust me & just wanted to tell himself he did. After New Years, he came to talk to my mom. My mom told him that he can't be with me if he didn't trust me & we tried it again. I was now having a hard time trusting him but at the same time I did. About a week ago we broke up because, I wasn't trusting him, I was smothering him and maybe some other reasons he failed to mention & I don't remember. We talked last Friday and I spent the weekend with him, we had a great time. On our way back from our trip, we decided to be friends with benefits. Monday night he asked me to stay the night, we had a couple drinks & he saw that my friend Tim texted me asking how I was doing. I don't remember exactly what I said but I said somethings to him that werent nice and him as well and I left. He told me he's done with me and is moving on, he doesn't want to be my friend, he's not going to hurt either of us by getting back with me again. I told him okay I'm gone. Then a couple minutes after this told me, we should take some off and if we decide then to be friends, we can. I never replied back to this text. So after my LONG relationship I tried to shorten up, why does he want to be friends? What's going on? (link)
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There are basically only two options as to why this has been dragged on so long:
1. He wants to be friends because there is something you showed to him that he wishes he could have back. That isn't going to come back because it disappeared when you cheated. You both are too broken to restore that.
2. You're easy now. He can pick you up and drop you at any time and you will always return when he wants it. You will always believe that everything was your fault as to why he dumped you "this" time. You will give him anything he wants ("Gee golly! Sure, we'll be friends with benefits! That will fix everything!"), any time he wants. You're just an easy person now for him to use when he needs a pick-me-up.
This entire relationship is a mess. It was ruined the very moment you cheated on him. At this point, there is no way it is going to work out for either of you. It's too broken to be fixed right now.
Step away from this entire mess. Do it now. You need to confront him and tell him that it has come to where you must draw the line and move on with your life without him. Don't try to be friends. Don't give him one last fling with you before you break it off. Be a woman and tell him that you understand you ruined the relationship years ago and that you now realize that it cannot be fixed.
Then part ways. Don't call him, text him, etc. What you're living right now is incredibly unhealthy for your mental state. You will never understand what love is if you continue with this.
The hard truth is that this relationship cannot and will not work unless you step away right now and mean it. The longer you persue this, the more damage you are doing to your mentality. The more you go back-and-forth and give him sex so you two can "friends with benefits" the less you understand what a real relationship means.
So, tell him that you're done with this and that you wish him a swell life. Then move on, seriously! Watch how other couples interact, take some time away from the dating scene, and then grow as a person. Understand what a relationship means before getting in another one. Understand all of the mistakes that were made in this relationship in a rational way. Take some classes on relationships--in the workplace, romantic, family, friendly, etc. Learn what it means to be in each of those sorts of relationships.
Example: Just because you're head-over-heels for this guy what he says may not be the honest truth. Where you REALLY smothering him or were you trying to be a good, loving girlfriend? Look at it rationally and don't go based on what he has said. He is just as messed up as you are right now. If he is using you (and now it's just become naturally for him to do this if it is the truth) then what he says may just be manipulation purposes.
Learn what a relationship is and after you feel you've grown (and I'm sure it will take plenty of time...years even?) then you can call him up to be FRIENDS! Friends. Not "friends with benefits." Not "friends with..." anything. Not "good" or "great" or "close" friends. Just friends. Just talking to eachother and hanging out sometimes. A healthy friendship.
You're young and I understand how things like this happen. I understand that you won't want to believe that he isn't such a great person in this relationship either. You may even try to defend him and say that he was never using you. The truth is that he probably has been for quite some time, but probably unintentionally. He felt you owed him for the pain you caused him and so he tried to take what you owed him and you, gladly, gave it to him. See what I'm saying? He isn't a bad person but the relationship was broken a long time ago and BOTH of you didn't understand that.
It's time you two stopped trying to make this work and move on with life. Give each other the chance to grow up and learn mistakes from the past. Going 'round and 'round hasn't helped so far, has it? It's not going to. It won't ever just magically "work" and "be right" again unless you take time to move on from this.
Learn to be without him. Learn to love and understand what that means. Learn to have respect for yourself and not sleep with some boy just because he says he loves you and you desperately do want him to love you. Learn what it is like to live, to make someone else truly happy, and to have a healthy life of your own.
In time you will look back and be horrified at what has gone on in this relationship. You'll be shocked that you ever let any of that happen. You'll work hard in the next relationship you're in so that you don't make those same, childish mistakes.
For now, let him know that is truly is over. Don't be mean about it. It's, essentially, the death of this situation. You both need to grow by yourselves. It needs to happen now if you ever want to be in a healthy situation with another person.
I hope all goes smoothly. Try to keep your mind off of him after your talk so that you don't fall back into this cycle. Keep occupied. Pick up some college courses that may interest you. Start spending time helping other people. A great way is to get involved with volunteering--you get to people-watch and understand different kinds of relationships that way too without having to put yourself in the middle of them right away.
If you have any more questions please feel free to inbox me :)
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If you have sex and the next day you get your period how high or low are your chances of being pregnant? There was no conterceptive used.Please let me know what you think. (link)
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Ovulation is the peak fertile time for a woman. Most women become pregnant during their time of ovulation. Ovulation does not, typically, occur during the menstrual period.
A woman ovulates, roughly, 14 or 15 days from the beginning of her last period; however, if your period is not a perfectly exact 28 day cycle then this can be thrown off. Ovulation lasts a few days. Your body's temperature slightly changes during this time and you secrete more cervical mucus to ensure there is enough for sperm to travel in properly. During this time sperm that entire your body are able to live slightly longer than usual. Sperm typically can live in a woman's body for 5 - 7 days, though it is not unheard of to find a few still alive at the two week mark.
A good way to keep predict your ovulation date is to use a calendar to keep track of your menstrual cycles. I, personally, like to use MyMonthlyCycles:
http://www.mymonthlycycles.com/
...since they can send me an alerting emailing that I may possibly be ovulating soon, when my period is predicted to start, and include helping tools to better track my cycles.
You should also take your basal body temperature each day, preferably the first thing in the morning. When your temperature slightly increases you may be coming closer to ovulation.
You can also purchase OTC ovulation testing kits from stores like Wal-Mart, Target, or your local pharmacy. All this requires you to do is to urinate a small amount into a cup the first thing in the morning, dip a stick in the urine, and wait for the results to appear. Typically, one line means you aren't about to ovulation and two means you are very close to ovulation (within the next 36 hours, typically).
Some women, especially with the increasing amount of toxins we are now exposed to, ovulate very late in their cycle or very early. Sometimes women don't ovulate at all while other months they may ovulate 3 times or more. It's almost unpredictable if you haven't been charting it for an extended period fo time. This being said, it is not a good idea to jump into using this sort of "birth control method" right away but let it grow into something you can use after a year or more of closely charting your cycles.
Any time a penis comes in contact with your vagina (even if there is no insertion) there is a risk of pregnancy. Pre-ejaculate is almost undetectable, especially in comparison to a regular ejaculation from a healthy male. A full ejaculation contains as many as 100 million sperm at a time, and sperm within pre-ejaculate can be as many as a few million. It only takes one to fertilize your egg.
This being said, coupled with the fact that you may or may not be a late ovulator, you very well can become pregnant the day before your period begins. You could become pregnant at any time of your cycle, actually, and here is why:
Women do not get pregnant the same day of intercourse, believe it or not. After you have sexual interaction the woman actually does not instantly become pregnant--it can take days before the sperm find and fertilize the egg and then another 6 - 10 days for the egg to actually attach to her uterine wall. Sperm can live in her body for a long time--they've even been some found alive in a woman 2 weeks after being ejaculated inside of her! Menstruation doesn't seem to play a part in killing sperm, as it tends to help lubricate the uterus to make it an easier travel up to the fallopian tubes to the egg!
This being said, it could take WEEKS to actually become pregnant after one sexual encounter. Kind of scary, isn't it?
Condoms help to prevent pregnancies to about 88% with typical usage. 88% of protection is better than 0% of a risk. Condoms do NOT protect at all against the transmission of STDs and STIs so make sure to have yourself and your partner tested regularly.
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2 questions, how can you calculate the days of your ovualation period? And also can you get pregnant if only the head of the penis enters (without a condom) and you were starting your period the night after you had sex? (link)
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Question 1:
A woman ovulates, roughly, 14 or 15 days from the beginning of her last period; however, if your period is not a perfectly exact 28 day cycle then this can be thrown off. Ovulation lasts a few days. Your body's temperature slightly changes during this time and you secrete more cervical mucus to ensure there is enough for sperm to travel in properly. During this time sperm that entire your body are able to live slightly longer than usual. Sperm typically can live in a woman's body for 5 - 7 days, though it is not unheard of to find a few still alive at the two week mark.
A good way to keep predict your ovulation date is to use a calendar to keep track of your menstrual cycles. I, personally, like to use MyMonthlyCycles:
http://www.MyMonthlyCycles.com
...since they can send me an alerting emailing that I may possibly be ovulating soon, when my period is predicted to start, and include helping tools to better track my cycles.
You should also take your basal body temperature each day, preferably the first thing in the morning. When your temperature slightly increases you may be coming closer to ovulation.
You can also purchase OTC ovulation testing kits from stores like Wal-Mart, Target, or your local pharmacy. All this requires you to do is to urinate a small amount into a cup the first thing in the morning, dip a stick in the urine, and wait for the results to appear. Typically, one line means you aren't about to ovulation and two means you are very close to ovulation (within the next 36 hours, typically).
Some women, especially with the increasing amount of toxins we are now exposed to, ovulate very late in their cycle or very early. Sometimes women don't ovulate at all while other months they may ovulate 3 times or more. It's almost unpredictable if you haven't been charting it for an extended period fo time. This being said, it is not a good idea to jump into using this sort of "birth control method" right away but let it grow into something you can use after a year or more of closely charting your cycles.
Question 2:
Any time a penis comes in contact with your vagina (even if there is no insertion) there is a risk of pregnancy. Pre-ejaculate is almost undetectable, especially in comparison to a regular ejaculation from a healthy male. A full ejaculation contains as many as 100 million sperm at a time, and sperm within pre-ejaculate can be as many as a few million. It only takes one to fertilize your egg.
This being said, coupled with the fact that you may or may not be a late ovulator, you very well can become pregnant the day before your period begins. You could become pregnant at any time of your cycle, actually, and here is why:
Women do not get pregnant the same day of intercourse, believe it or not. After you have sexual interaction the woman actually does not instantly become pregnant--it can take days before the sperm find and fertilize the egg and then another 6 - 10 days for the egg to actually attach to her uterine wall. Sperm can live in her body for a long time--they've even been some found alive in a woman 2 weeks after being ejaculated inside of her! Menstruation doesn't seem to play a part in killing sperm, as it tends to help lubricate the uterus to make it an easier travel up to the fallopian tubes to the egg!
This being said, it could take WEEKS to actually become pregnant after one sexual encounter. Kind of scary, isn't it?
Condoms help to prevent pregnancies to about 88% with typical usage. 88% of protection is better than 0% of a risk. Condoms do NOT protect at all against the transmission of STDs and STIs so make sure to have yourself and your partner tested regularly.
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so my boyfriend and i were laying down and i was laying ontop of him, and we were making out and we both had jeans on.. i had underwear on too (so i was fully clothed and so was he) i think he cummed, and there was a wet spot on his pants, it was little i think. but the very next day, i had my period.. could i be AT ALL anyway pregnant????! (im not going to a doctor or getting a pregnancy test or the morning after pill.) im just kind of freaking out since im literally a really good girl. pregnancy can NOT be an option.
thank you in advance!! (link)
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SPERM DOES NOT DIE WHEN IT HITS AIR! OXYGEN (AIR) DOES NOT KILL SPERM!
Sperm can swim through fabric (clothes) as long as there is moisture. If he made your vagina area moist enough to moisten your clothes then you could have gotten pregnant.
Women do not get pregnant the same day of intercourse, believe it or not. After you have sexual interaction the woman actually does not instantly become pregnant--it can take days before the sperm find and fertilize the egg and then another 6 - 10 days for the egg to actually attach to her uterine wall. Sperm can live in her body for a long time--they've even been some found alive in a woman 2 weeks after being ejaculated inside of her!
This being said, it could take WEEKS to actually become pregnant after one sexual encounter. Kind of scary, isn't it?
So, even though you started your period the day after engaging in RISKY behavior does not make you in the clear. You very well could have become pregnant, though the risk is probably lowered since the ejaculate was not directly in your vagina.
If "pregnancy can NOT be an option" then do something about it! Stop doing these stupid things that lead to pregnancy then or pick up something to help prevent it at least! Use your brain! You're scared your pregnant because deep down inside you KNOW it was risky. You don't need us to tell you that you MIGHT be pregnant because you KNOW it was possible. Please, use your senses and pick up some condoms at the very least if you're going to continue this!
I'm so worried about today's youth. Please, use your brain. Don't believe the nonsense about sperm dying instantly in air. It's common sense that it doesn't. Don't believe that sperm cannot swim through fabric--hello! If it's moist, they can! Many, MANY women get pregnant while on their period so it isn't like it's impossible! Please, be smart next time. Have him slide on a condom before dry humping. It might sound a little silly but giving birth in 9 months isn't going to make life any happier, is it?
I hope you found you're not pregnant. If in doubt, do purchase a home pregnancy test.
And, no, I'm not trying to belittle you. I'm worried about you. I don't want you to ruin your life because of something like this. Just, please...use your head so you don't end up in a sticky situation.
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soo, if my boyfriend had a wet spot on his jeans (could have been pre cum or ejaculation, i think it was ejaculation] and i had jeans on but i was straddling him and that was around december 19, could have been earlier or later, and now its january 23.. could i be pregnant?? i feel like im getting bigger (like getting a stomach) like i cannot be pregnant from MAKING OUT. i will honestly die. or kill myself honestly. like, after i had my period on the 3rd (of this month i think.. i spotted for about a week after that) im freaking out. ive never spotted before, but i have long periods. my parents would kill me. im only 17. help me? (link)
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Oh, wow! I am so sorry I didn't answer this sooner!
I'm so sad that the rumor that "sperm dies instantly outside of the body" or "sperm dies instantly when it hits air" is still being spread, especially on Advicenators. No, sperm does not "die instantly" or even "within seconds" after being ejaculated outside of the body. It does not! The sperm swim slower outside of the body, live shorter lifespans (A LOT more than seconds, believe me), and are mostly dead by the time the ejaculate actually dries (which takes more than seconds, right? Hours in some conditions, right? Right.). If the sperm is on a body part then the body temperature can keep the little guys alive for quite some time. Sperm are amazing little creatures.
Just for reference, men who are trying to raise their sperm count are told to wear loose clothing on their bottom half to help the temperature drop to a cooler temperature. Hmm...doesn't sound like the sperm are DYING from the temperature drop, does it?
If oxygen (or anything in our air) killed the sperm then NOBODY would get pregnant. It's ridiculously unbelievable to think that we, females, have no sort of "air" or "oxygen" in our vaginas. Our vaginas are simply fleshy HOLES--and what happens to be in holes, typically? Air. And when you shove something in a hole, what is pushed first into that hole? Air. And, speaking of this, what are queefs? Air being released from the...VAGINA! Yes, AIR/OXYGEN does NOT kill sperm!
Yes, pregnancy is very possible actually.
Pre-ejaculate still contains some sperm, even though it's a lot less than a complete ejaculation. A full ejaculation contains as many as 100 million sperm at a time, and sperm within pre-ejaculate can be as many as a few million.
If semen got to the moistened area of the vagina then you could have been impregnated, very easily at that.
Sperm can "swim" through fabric even as long as it's moist. It doesn't even have to be "wet" for them to be able to travel through it. A little moisture is all they need to survive the journey. The moisture can come from the pre-ejaculate itself, your own moisture from your vagina, or even sweat that you two may release during the activity.
If his "wet spot on his jeans" made your jeans wet all the way through to your vagina then it was a risky activity. Plain and simple.
It only takes one sperm to fertilize one egg and create one baby. A few million sperm within one pre-ejaculate is a lot more than one. If conditions are right then the sperm that do travel into the vagina can survive anywhere between 5 to 7 days, and in absolutely perfect conditions they have been found still alive at 2 weeks!
If you are going to continue to engage in risky sexual activities like this and do not plan to become pregnant then please take the proper precautionary measures and use a condom. Condoms help to prevent pregnancies to about 88% with typical usage. If you are not willing to take oral contraceptives or any form of hormonal birth control then you are left with either condoms or risking pregnancy. You need to make a decision, together, on which is the best option. Creating another life simply because you wanted to have a little unprotected fun is not very bright and can cause a lot of problems in your future. Get your priorities straight before continuing these activities.
If you have any more questions please feel free to ask me! :)
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Hey, so, I have this boyfriend who I've been going out with for about 3 months now. He's the sweetest guy I've ever met and a die hard Christian. I go to church with him every Wednesday night, and our friends tag along. I've been a Christian for most of my life, but there was this period during middle school where I wasn't exactly sure if it was really the right thing for me. I think I may still have a few doubts, but I go with him anyway because all our friends go to, and I figure it might change my mind eventually. However, my boyfriend keeps pressuring me to get saved and give my life to Christ, but I don't think I'm ready for it yet. I've told him multiple times that I feel like he's pushing me into it, but it doesn't seem to make a difference. Now it's gotten to the point where I either do it, or he breaks up with me. I don't think I'm ready for that kind of commitment. I love this boy, and I have no clue what to do. Any suggestions? (link)
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You need to tell him, flat-out, that pressuring someone to believe your beliefs only creates lies and hidden aggression. Explain to him that you CAN do what he wants but it will be you lying to him.
If you do what he wants then you'll be lying to him and not truthful about your lifestyle. If you're not ready to "give your life to Christ" then you're not going to no matter what words come out of your mouth--if it isn't true in your heart then it's just a lie.
God is more important than some boy and what he believes is right for you. If you're not ready to commit to Him then just don't even pretend to do it. Living a lie doesn't create any happiness.
Tell your boyfriend that you can do without him if that is what it comes down to. Your relationship with God is between you and God and if you aren't ready to commit to Him then you just aren't--plain and simple.
This is the reason many people dislike "Christians." Nobody likes to be bullied into anything. Nobody likes to be cornered with something so serious like this.
Being pressured into a certain religious belief can crush the Truth for you later. Many Christians need to realize this--pressuring does not create truth, but only hidden resentment. By pressuring someone like this you may take their opportunity to actually find and follow God later in life--because they become cold toward the entire idea of God's love. This pressure being put on you may lead to a much greater struggle within yourself down the road and your boyfriend really needs to get that through his head.
Know that not all believers are like your boyfriend. Many of us know all too well that loving God is not an overnight thing. Many of us understand that it takes YOU to WANT to love God before you are able to. Many Christians have been where you are now--confused by the pressure of someone else's religious beliefs.
If you're interested in Christianity then read the Bible on your own and seek guidance when you need some more insight to the passages. If you find God later in life then terrific (and I do hope you do when you are ready to give ALL of you)!
This relationship is unhealthy if it centers around you NEEDING to believe in what he believes when you simply do not at this time. You both need to realize that. Please explain this to him and make your ultimatium--Stop the pressure to become saved or move on to someone else who already believes as he does.
Please do not let this experience ruin your overall idea of Christianity. We aren't all die-hard, as you describe. Loving and believing in God means realizing that all will happen in His time. He will give you the signs and signals throughout your lifetime to help you open your eyes, and it's a sad thing to overlook them because of previous bad experiences with people you trusted about God. Helping someone come closer to God means teaching them and assisting their understanding of Him. It means helping them to open their eyes to all God is surrounding us. It means setting a good, strong example of the love God has for us so that other people will want to open their eyes and minds to Him. It doesn't mean scaring another person into "believing."
And know that the pressure your boyfriend is putting on you is something he has probably been taught for years. He has been taught that loving someone else means helping them to God. Many believers do not understand that helping does NOT mean pressuring. Try to help him understand this, even if the relationship is going to come to a close.
It is also very possible that this has to do with beliefs as well. Christians, typically, believe that they should only be coupled with other believers, which makes a fair amount of sense. It is also extremely helpful for compatiability reasons to be with someone of the same religious beliefs. If he believes that he should only be with another Christian then it is really better if you two part ways now.
The right thing to do in this situation is to talk to him about this and help him to understand where this is going sour. Based on your mature discussion you two should be able to make a choice for the future of this relationship. If it just cannot work out then don't pressure it to but know that you did all you could to salvage what was left.
Love means being honest with your partner and not pretending to be someone your not on their behalf. Love means helping eachother improve on personal levels and showing them a better way in how to do certain things. In some cases, it just isn't the right time for love. Talk it out and decide together.
I hope all is well in the future and you will be ready to commit to God sometime in your lifetime. If you have any more questions please feel free to ask me directly :)
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I have some terrible armpit odor and I don't know why. It started about two months ago or more and it just will not go away! I was using ivory bar soap and I switched to Tom's of Maine Natural deodorant bar soap (unscented) and it helped for, literally, two days. When I realized that the soap was no longer helping my body odor (and it seemed to get stronger and more rancid) I tried switching to the Dial antibacterial soap (the gold bar). It worked for about a week and then no longer did it's job either but did help some.
During this time I tried a few different deodorants to help keep the bacteria under my arms in control (what I assume the problem actually is). I tried Naturally Fresh Roll On Deodorant Crystal, Tom's of Maine Natural Long-Lasting Deodorant Stick (Apricot scented), Home Health Deodorant Herbal Magic Roll On(unscented), and Alvera All Natural Roll-On Deodorant Aloe (unscented). I wanted to try to stay away from the aluminum in other deodorants so that's why I choose the more natural kinds.
Anyway, nothing will cut this onion odor! I am trying not to eat smelly foods, especially onion, and it doesn't seem to make a difference at all. It's embarrassing and I am afraid to go out in public like this. What can I do? It smells within 10 minutes after I get out of the shower even if I apply deodorant right away and it only gets worse during the day. PLEASE HELP ME!!! (link)
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I suffer from this exact same problem, which has occurred almost overnight quite suddenly. I understand the torment of trying to not have such a strange, strong odor about you.
I've searched the internet on various ways to remove stinky body odor. I, too, suffer from an odd onion-like odor, only mine also smells as if it is rotting potatoes at the same time. It's very, very unpleasant.
It's good you're trying to stay clear of the aluminum in other deodorants, by the way. I wouldn't "switch back" to the "bad" deodorants just yet though. Try this out:
In the shower use a washcloth and wash your armpits separately from the rest of your body. Wash them with an antibacterial soap (yellow bar Dial if you must) twice at least.
Purchase a small spray bottle like they sell in Wal-Mart for $.97 and fill it with distilled water. Take Grapefruit Seed Extract (GSE):
http://www.vitacost.com/NutriBiotic-GSE-Liquid-Concentrate-Grapefruit-Seed-Extract
...and drop about 20 drops in there, shake well and mist-spray a few times, and then pour it out. You've just 'cleaned' the bottle.
Now, refill the bottle with distilled water and add 15 drops of GSE. Shake well, again.
When you get out of the shower (as soon as you dry off), spray this mixture under your arms a few times with the misting action. Do not apply deodorant. Get dressed and have a nice day at home.
At the end of the day, check your odor by smelling under your arms. If you smell the "onion" smell then increase the amount of drops of GSE in the container by 5. Some people are treated with the 15 drops while others are needing 30 drops per container. Make sure to always shake the bottle before each use though.
Use this product daily and add it to your wash each time you do a load of laundry. Make sure you're washing socks with socks and underwear with underwear in case any of those nasty bacteria tries to make it to your shirts. I suggest adding about 25 drops of GSE per washer load.
In time, the odor will lessen and you will be able to only smell the 'natural armpit' odor of your body just slightly. When you reach this you can begin applying deodorant after spraying GSE on the armpits (you may want to spray over the deodorant too, just for extra precaution).
Ta-da...a safe way to be odor free :)
Need a more natural alternative?
Try this out, if you can...
Wash your body with tea-tree body wash, PH balanced. I prefer Desert Essence Castile Liquid Soap with Organic Tea Tree Oil:
http://www.vitacost.com/Desert-Essence-Castile-Liquid-Soap-with-Organic-Tea-Tree-Oil
Wash your armpits TWICE in the shower, as well as the rest of your body, of course.
When you exit the shower, take two cotton balls and soak them with rubbing alcohol. Wipe the alcohol under each armpit, covering the area, and then lower your arm onto the cotton ball and hold for two minutes while you go about your other things (moisturizing face, getting your lower half clothed, etc).
Remove cotton balls. Take a hair dryer and dry the armpit area gently. Then spray the above GSE mixture onto your armpits and re-dry with the hairdryer (gently!). Apply your preferred deodorant.
If your armpits get too dry then lay off of the alcohol for a couple of days and apply lotion after washing your armpits well before bedtime.
Take a chlorella supplement each and every single day as directed on the bottle/bag. It's preferably to get Yaeyama Chlorella which have broken cell walls so that your body can absorb and process it better.
Also, take a probiotics before each meal so that you can replenish good bacteria in the intestines. Much, much body odor really comes from this area, believe it or not! If you can do an enema then it is suggested you take one to help clear your system out--but remember to take those probiotics so that your colon can be replenished with good bacteria.
Don't give up.
There will be a remedy that will solve it.
I am certain of it! :)
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If your a virgin (( girl )) then how can you get pregnant? (link)
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You can become pregnant if a guy ejaculates near your vagina. You could also become pregnant if the guy had ejaculated on the bed and you placed your bare vagina on it or it soaked through your underwear. Being a virgin doesn't mean you cannot get pregnant, believe it or not.
The hymen usually has a small hole in it as it is. A hymen is made of very thin tissue and it is fairly easy to tear or stretch. It's located at the entrance to the vagina so, actually, it isn't inside of the vagina. The hole is there to allow menstrual blood to escape the body and is usually too small to accommodate an entire penis to enter the vagina.
It is rare but some females are born with an imperforate hymen--or a hymen with no opening. A doctor will do a simple surgery to create a hole in the hymen of these newborn females so that blood from later menstrual cycles does not back up into the body.
Anyway, since women have a small hole in their hymens anyway things can go into the vagina and, obviously, come out of the vagina. This being said, if a guy got his semen on your vagina in some fashion then there IS a chance of pregnancy to occur.
So, technically, even if there is not penile penetration but his fluids come in contact with your fluids there is a chance pregnancy could occur. Any time a guy's semen even remotely comes in contact with your vaginal fluid there is a chance of pregnancy. It only takes one sperm to fertilize one egg and they are created to do whatever it takes to accomplish fertilization.
If you do have vaginal intercourse and you do not completely break/tear your hymen it will stretch out and create a larger hole, just as your vagina will naturally stretch out to accommodate the penis. Some hymens are elastic enough to permit a penis to enter without tearing, or they will tear only partially, and there may be no bleeding at all.
Engaging in sexual acts means always taking the risk of becoming pregnant since no contraceptive is 100% effective. Please get yourself completely informed before deciding to participate in such activities.
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Ok so I think I might be pregnant. I was supposed to start my period today, and I guess I did kind of...I woke up to a very small amount of brown-ish red blood and I put a tampon in because I don't know if this was my period or spotting. I've always been pro-choice, so I want an abortion. I am not ready for a baby, but I'm not going to say I wasn't ready for sex. I just should have been a lot smarter about it. My boyfriend and I had JUST decided to stop having unprotected sex about a week ago (before I suspected any pregnancy) because we both just realized how important it was for me not to get pregnant and how unready we were for that kind of responsibiliy, whether I had the baby or not. I haven't told any one of my suspicions yet, I am not even entirely sure myself. I know there are 2 people that I have to tell if I am pregnant; my boyfriend and my mom. My mom will probably be upset because we have had the "sex talk" numerous times before. She basically told me that she didn't think sex was bad at all, she just didn't want me to get pregnant, so she asked me to wait until I was 18 so I could get birth control. I want to tell my mom really bad. I just hate this "I might be pregnant" feeling because if anything, I just want to find out if I am and get an abortion and just never be stupid about sex again. But I don't want ANYONE else to know. Not my stepdad, not my dad, not any family or friends. I think if I tell her, it is MY secret to tell, if I want to, not hers. But I'm not sure if she will do that for me because I've never been in this situation before. And I know I'd have to tell my boyfriend, but we've discussed this before and we both feel abortion would be the best option for our situations. So the basic questions I'm asking here are;
-How do I tell my mom and how do I keep her from telling anyone?
-How do I KNOW if I am pregnant? I haven't taken a pregnancy test yet because I don't have a car to go get one.
-I'm sure I'm going to lose trust from my mom if all this is as it appears and I am pregnant, but is there anyway to lessen the blow when I tell her? I really don't want to hurt her and I don't want her to think differently of me or my boyfriend.
Thanks a lot for any advice...
PS: Please don't give me the "if you're ready to have sex, you should be ready for the consequences" anti-abortion line...I know it was stupid, I really don't need anyone telling me that... (link)
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If you're only wanting someone to make you feel better then why bother even posting? I wasn't belittling you, I was being blunt and honest. If you cannot open your eyes to things I've pointed out then that isn't my issue.
Saying, "Don't give me the advice I know you're going to give me because I think it's just stupid and I don't want to hear it!" is just flat-out childish. You just don't want to hear it because you know it's true.
Thank God you're not actually pregnant.
Oh, and people lie on an anonymous site because they want to manipulate others into giving them the "advice" they truly want to hear. By lying you can make us say the things you want to hear to make yourself feel better about your decision(s). That's why you'd lie ;) use your head, kiddie, it's all quite common sense.
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Not to be rude, but I'm not entirely sure what you really want us to say to you.
Obviously, you feel that you have things figured out.
The problem is that you are completely unsure about everything.
Listen to yourself!
You're saying you can't figure out how to tell if you're pregnant but your period MIGHT be late because it's strange and you haven't taken a home pregnancy test yet. What do you want us to say? Are you hoping we can look into our crystal balls and predict your chances of being pregnant? All we can say is, "Buy a home pregnancy test and see a doctor for a clinical test." Really.
Sorry but the "anti-abortion line" is true. If you can't keep your legs together then you have to be aware that there are consequences. It wasn't ANY surprise to you that sex = making babies. Sex without condoms and/or hormonal birth control pills leads to babies very easily. Babies will come when babies are made. If you're doing things that make babies and not trying to stop their creation then ... are you REALLY that prepared for sex? Do you REALLY have everything figured out?
Advice on telling your mother? Well, there's two options. You either tell her and let her know that you want it to be hush-hush and that you'll be getting rid of the "evidence" soon or you don't tell her at all. We don't really know your mother so we can't say if she will actually tell anyone or not. It's completely your choice.
As for your mother being upset that you may be pregnant, there isn't much more to do. What's done is done and an adult will realize that. She'll probably feel some guilt for not steering you in a better direction. She'll probably be disappointed in you. The fact is that her world probably doesn't revolve solely around you so she will get over it. Telling her that you will be aborting it may be more devastating than anything though. She'll probably be torn--her lovely daughter did something bad (forgiven) and may have made her very first (?) grandchild!..but that daughter will be aborting that grandchild so you'll never get to see it... :\ mixed emotions, at the very least!
Your mother doesn't sound very harsh or cold about things, especially having sex. She seems very slack and open about the whole idea, but would wish you'd be a little more mature before engaging in RISKY behavior. You didn't so if you tell her she probably won't be so upset or punishing for having sex before she would have liked. Really, if your mother can say, "I'd just prefer you to have sex when you're older so you won't be a teenage mother..." she probably isn't going to freak out or be too surprised you already did it. My mother was pretty slack too when it came to me having sex.
I really don't believe your line about, "My boyfriend and I had JUST decided to stop having unprotected sex about a week ago (before I suspected any pregnancy) because we both just realized how important it was for me not to get pregnant and how unready we were for that kind of responsibiliy..." because it's unrealistic. If it was IMPORTANT to not get pregnant then you would have used multiple forms of protection at the very least. A 16 year old girl having a discussion with her boyfriend around the lines of, "I don't want to get pregnant by you so we're no longer having sex, K?" ... yeah? Doubtful.
The fact is, you started having sex with your now-boyfriend three months into the relationship because:
" I don't feel like sex makes 2 people closer together, it just seems like a fun thing to do with someone..."
...sex isn't something "fun to do" because it leads to things like babies. Sex wasn't created for fun, believe it or not. Sex, in essence, is for reproduction and intimate bonding. Babies are serious, serious things.
Things that are "fun to do with someone" and not so risky in the making babies department would be: rollerblading, having a picnic, playing at the arcade, paintballing, learning how to play the guitar or starting a band, watching good movies or going to the theatre, playing board games, playing games like touch-football or capture-the-flag, painting pictures together, making dinner or dessert together, being active in a club, dancing, bowling, minature golfing (put-put), playing laser-tag, go-carting, playing video games together, star-gazing, going to the zoo museum, swimming, and plenty more fairly safe-but-FUN activites to do with your boyfriend!
Then you say, "...he only cares about sneaking out with me so we can have sex." And you think we really believe the big WE-talked-and-decided-to-not-have-sex-anymore-because-we're-mature line?! Really doubtful you had a serious discussion with him about no longer engaging in sexual relations...
(Oh, and answering a previous question of yours in relation to your later questions: Sounds like sex changed your relationship not for the better!)
Aborting the baby doesn't really solve anything. Have you learned anything about this sort of issue? It doesn't sound like it. Are you regretful? You probably won't be. If you don't learn anything then how do you know you won't repeat this abortion-thing? Is your plan to never have sex again until you're ready to have a baby or is your plan to keep aborting the baby each time you do get pregnant? Condoms break and birth control pills don't always work...what's the long-term sex-plan here?
There are hundreds of thousands of people that are looking to adopt, especially infants. ESPECIALLY infants! I'm not sure why you're so hardcore abortion but I do ask you to re-think it. I, myself, would be interested in adoption with my husband. A lot of people don't have the ability to become pregnant and would make great homes for a child. A lot of people won't ever get that chance because someone that IS able to give birth is too self-centered to think of others for just a moment. Carrying the baby to term doesn't mean you have to mother it. It doesn't mean it even has to change your life. It's, in the long-run, healthier for YOU (your body). You can even find prospective parents before you even give birth (which is the MOST caring, thoughful thing you could do in this situation).
Before you do anything, and I mean absolutely anything, you need to sit down and have a cold-hard talk with YOURSELF. What are you doing?! Where are you going with this mess?! What will aborting solve in this case?! What is it that you're afraid of in having this baby if you ARE pregnant?! What happens when you get pregnant again?!
And, so you know, abortion isn't the "easy" way out either:
http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutmetopic.php?t=1043&userboard_id=48957
You don't have to be anti-abortion to not have an abortion. You can be pro-choice and still keep your baby and nobody is going to point fingers at you or hate you. Really.
In short:
1. Tell your mother to not tell anyone or just don't tell her at all.
2. Take a home pregnancy test at least. You CAN get to the store, nobody believes you can run around and have sex with your boyfriend but cannot figure out a way to the supermarket.
3. Immaturity is taking over here. Tell her or don't. She isn't going to hate you or disown you. She knows you're 16 and horny. She's already had the "sex talk" multiple times because she KNOWS! Just make a decision and sort this out.
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I'm 15 and have recently found out that I'm pregnant the guy wants nothing to do with it and i've been really stressed out about it, people keep saying you can hit yourself in the stomach and make yourself miscarriage is this true ? and what are the symptoms of miscarriage.. thank you (link)
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The reason that people are hospitalized because of a miscarriage is because it can be very fatal. Hitting yourself so hard that it kills a life inside of you can be EXTREMELY hurtful to YOUR body. It's more likely that you would hemorrhage (bleed) to death, especially if you're anemic.
Yes, you can lose a baby by getting hit too hard. You can also very well lose your own life, believe it or not. One good punch can rupture something, you could fall and hit your head, or have severe internal bleeding and your life could be completely over. If not that, you could be left with broken bones and serious bruises. Many people die from simple fights like that.
If a baby really did die within a pregnant woman then she would have to go to the hospital to make sure her body was intact and safe. The doctors will go in and scrap out the inside of her uterus in HOPES that she doesn't get an infection or be left with scar tissue (scar tissue would make the woman infertile for the rest of her days). She would still bleed just as much, if not much more because of the seriousness of the matter, from getting hit so hard as having an abortion. She would bleed for weeks probably--just like an abortion--only she may suffer some more pain because of the injuries.
It would be likely she suffer a lot of internal bleeding so she may bleed excessively or have to be hospitalized for a lengthy period of time because of the internal and external bleeding.
As a note, the baby isn't just going to magically POP out of the woman and lay on the ground after a punch. The baby has attached to the inside of the woman so the woman's body will have to expel in. If the baby is large then the doctor has to go in and manually pull the body out. If the baby is small the woman's body will try to expel it and the woman may see chunks of flesh coming out of her body over a period of weeks. This is why a doctor is absolutely needed.
For further note, there have been cases in which a baby has died in the womb and the mother's body does not realize it so it does not expel it. Take note that this is extremely dangerous and you can die from poisoning from it. It can lead to major, MAJOR health complications later in life, if you live through it all.
Any way it is, when a woman loses a baby--abortion, miscarriage, accident, etc.--it is extremely risky. Accidents are probably the most riskiest followed by an actual abortion. Purposely miscarrying means you damaged your body so much that it can no longer function properly. When your body cannot function properly you, of course, lose a baby--but your life is then in jeopardy too and a visit to the hospital is ALWAYS required, even if the injury was accidental.
Stop trying to kill your own baby and start acting like a grown-up. You made grown-up choices and now it's time to figure out how you're going to deal with them.
You do not need to murder your unborn child.
Adoption is completely available and it costs NOTHING. There are so many good people that are wanting to adopt in this world--including me!
Hell, you can even leave a newborn at a hospital and you won't be questioned or anything. It is LEGAL to just up and leave your newborn in the hospital if you don't want it.
Regarding your pregnancy: Your parents WILL get over it.
Your partner WILL get over it--even if they do not support you! There are MANY women who make it as a single mother.
There is no reason to stop another's life because you're too selfish to let it interfere with yours. Your baby did NOTHING wrong! He/she did not choose to be created. He/she did not decide it was smart for you to be having sex when you weren't ready to deal with possible consequences.
Do not take an innocent life.
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My cat keeps pooping outside her litter, she's 9 years old, I clean the litter at least twice a day, the litter brand has not been changed. The only thing I believe it is caused by is that we introduced two cats in the house about four months ago, although she only started doing this this last week. I believe that could be the problem but I need her to stop! I cannot remove the other cats because they belong to my roommate and my lease isn't up until July. Is there any advice anyone can give me? (link)
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Some cats are VERY particular about where they poop and if another cat has used that area before them. This being said, it's usually suggested to have AT LEAST FOUR litter boxes for two cats. This means you need AT LEAST SIX litter boxes for those three cats :)
You use the same litter in each of the SIX litter boxes, but you always "scoop" the urine and poop out as frequently as you can, especially after the new cats since the older one is having problems with it.
If six doesn't do the trick then you may have to resort to drastic measures--at least one litter box per room in the house (except your kitchen, of course). Some cats will find that more appropriate, but it takes a lot more maintenance since you have to scoop frequently, again especially after the new cats.
Change each litter box every three days. That way the scents won't build up so much but there will be enough scent for them to become accustomed to each other.
Next, if the cat STILL isn't taking a liking to the litter box situation, you may need to have two per each room the cats frequent. This means that if they are rarely in the bathroom then just keep one in there--but if they're usually hanging out in the living room then place TWO in there. If you choose to have two cat litter boxes per room then put them on opposite sides of the room. Still scoop frequently and change the litter every three days or so.
If the cat poops outside of the litter box then remove the poop and place it in a litter box. This puts his scent there so she knows it's a "safe" area that is "hers". THEN, go back to the spot she had pooped on and clean it very, very well (method below).
Make sure the clean the areas she's pooped/peed on the floor very well with cleaner specially designed for animal urine and scents. We have a really great brand here at home that we've purchased at Wal-mart, it's Out! Stain and odor remover (first one):
http://www.outinternational.com/productline/so_removers.html
After you treat the area with that product (let it dry, give it time) you may have to put a solution of vinegar and water (put 3 cups of water to 1 cup of vinegar) and rinse the area well and blot up as much as possible after you've cleaned the areas. If you, by chance, have a carpet shampooer then put the 3 cups water to 1 cup vinegar in it and "shampoo" that area of the rug with it.
Using sprays that would cause her to be unhappy about a certain area is something you definately should not be doing right now. Do as I've listed and give her time. If she comes around and starts using the litter area then GOOD! Leave the large amount of litter boxes around the house and after a few months and you can start to remove one at a time (1 each month).
Give your cat plenty of time before getting rid of any of them or doing anything drastic like that. She's still scared that another cat is taking over her territory. Sometimes all it takes is plenty of opportunities to potty in the RIGHT areas :)
I hope all goes well with your kitties and they get along well enough that this issue stops. If you have any more questions please feel free to ask me! :)
P.S. ALL of the litter boxes that you end up placing out should be well away from all food and water sources that the cats use or may use. We don't like to poop were we eat and neither do our pets!
P.P.S. If the problem persists take your older cat to a clinic to be checked out, as it may be a sign of something related to older age.
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I always heard that Richard Simmons was gay. My mom use to have the Sweatin' to the Oldies work-out VHS tape she watched every day. I know Richard Simmons sounds a little high-pitched for a man but so does my best guy friend and he's not queer.
Anyway, I'm really just curious is all. Is Richard Simmons an open homosexual for sure? (link)
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Richard Simmons is NOT a homosexual.
Richard Simmons has been questioned about his sexuality many times. In 2003 he denied such rumors of his sexuality.
He is said to be straight and is quite the remarkable man. People feel he is homosexual because of is brightly colored clothing and his short shorts he enjoys wearing while working out and in public. His voice is, indeed, high-pitched for a man's and he is always incredibly upbeat.
Richard Simmons is a very awesome man though and we really shouldn't be belittling him with rumors like that. If you don't believe his love for others then you should check out:
http://abcnews.go.com/Nightline/story?id=6940049&page=1
He even CALLS obese people PERSONALLY for inspiration and encouragement! EVERY MORNING in his OWN TIME! "I call them to check up on them. I call them to make them laugh. I call them to tell them how beautiful they are. I tell them that they are successful and they're worth it. I tell them about having more self-respect. I thank them." (- Richard Simmons)
He has so much money from his videos (now over 50 versions) that he no longer has to work at all. He doesn't have to make more videos, call people, or have classes--but he does anyway! All he wants is a healthy you :) I don't know why we have to be so harsh on the man!
He had a really rough time growing up with his weight. He was 250lbs when he was a teenager. He had tried diet pills in elementary school, tried bulimia, anorexia, abusing laxatives, etc. He knows how it feels so he strives to help others in healthy ways.
"Everyone in this world is somehow connected, and so why not just be nice to everybody?" - Richard Simmons
I couldn't have said it better.
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OK, so my boyfriend is really obsessed with Megan Fox. Well who wouldn't be? I like her too, but he is absolutely CRAZED with her. He talks about her 24/7. It gets kind of annoying, as he never wants to talk about anything else when he gets on the subject. It makes me feel like he wants me to be more like her, and I'd have to starve myself to have an amazing body like that. Any suggestions? Or should I just get over it? Thanks. (link)
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While I don't think you should just up and dump the poor guy because his topics are now considered boring to you, I do think you need to open the lines of communication here and tell him how this is making you feel!
Sit down and have a mature conversation with the guy about your relationship. Tell him that you love spending time with him and you want to get to know him. Let him know that it seems like all he ever likes to talk about with you is Megan Fox and that it has become irritating. Explain to him that it now feels almost like belittling you for not actually BEING her and that it is damaging your self-esteem. Let him know that you don't want to end the relationship but IMPROVE it.
Chances are he's fairly young and doesn't quite understand how girls work. He probably isn't purposelly doing this to you every chance he gets--it's just something on his mind often. Help him out by starting conversations about other things that you'd like to know about him. When he's done a good job about not mentioning his obsession with the celebrity then make sure to thank him for it, letting him know you appreciate it (maybe he buy him a little something as a 'thank you for caring about me and my feelings too' thing).
If you want to be a mature person then you don't just up and dump someone without giving them a chance to improve. Talk to him about it all, be caring and comfortable. Let him know you understand but you need him to do some understanding about you now.
If he doesn't improve (give him a good month to try it out, especially with you trying to put some new topics in the conversation to help him along) then explain that the relationship is dying for you and that you do not know what else to do to salvage this. Remind him that you talked to him about the main problem and that you feel that you two are just not as compatible as you once thought.
It's possible he just doesn't know how to act with a girlfriend. Explain the problem and give him a chance before booting him.
If you have any more questions please feel free to ask me directly :)
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16/f, 17/m.
This will be my and my boyfriends 2nd valentines day together. Last year we went out for a meal, but this year I want to cook him dinner. But, I can't think of anything to cook! To start with I've decided on chocolate and strawberries and heart-shaped shortcake for dessert (it's our favourite to eat and to bake together). But what about the main meal!? I know how to cook spaghetti bolognese but I've cooked him that before. I don't really have much cooking experience but I can make anything as long as I have a recipe, I would find one myself but I honestly have no idea what to look for!
Another thing about valentines day, I just moved house a few months ago so my room isn't fully decorated. But I was thinking about in the evening, I can decorate my walls with like hearts and the words "I love you" written cut out from card across my wall, for when we come upstairs to watch films or something. Is there anything else I can do with my room to make it more romantic?
Any other ideas or suggestions for valentines day are appreciated :) (link)
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Try making his favorite food, whatever that may be, for the main course. Even if it's pizza, you can make it yourself (crust and all) and surprise him with the treat. If that fails and he has no favorite main meal then fall back to the basics of pasta--spagetti? fettucini alfredo? ravioli? perogies? lagasna? Once chosen search the internet for good recipes for the specific dish or ask here on Advicenators and I'm sure someone will have a tasty recipe for something more specific! :)
Oh, and don't be afraid to make that same dish again (the spaghetti bolognese) if he likes it. The whole point is to make him something he enjoys by yourself. If he likes, he'll appreciate it! :)
Create the dish for yourself one day and try it out. If the recipe is good then go for it and make it for your boyfriend on Valentine's Day. You absolutely MUST taste-test the chosen dish before creating it for your first time though or it might end up being a nasty surprise!
Candles can make any room romanic if the lights are dimmed and there are enough of them. Make sure to get unscented candles though, as the scented ones may become too overwhelming. Also make sure to light them away from the walls and drapes so that they do not burn anything during the evening. To light them, simply run to your room after dinner to set the mood and then invite him up :) Decorating the walls with cut-out "I love you" messages is a very cute idea. Also think of picking up some red curtains (and bedding if you can afford it) for the room just to add that extra touch.
Pick a nice movie that you both will enjoy. Guys don't typically like sappy tear-jerks so try to find a good combination of it. Romantic movies men might actually ENJOY with you:
50 First Dates
The Princess Bride
Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet (starring Clare Danes and Leonardo DiCaprio)
Mr. and Mrs. Smith
Fifth Element
His Girl Friday
The Butterly Effect
West Side Story
A Knight's Tale
Jerry Maguire
What Women Want
Forest Gump
I hope things go well for Valentine's Day! :)
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need nickname...my name is crystal i love sceamo music "blak veil brides, escape the fate, parkway drive, stuff like that" i love myy friends (even tho they tease me bout being emo) i love my skinneys and myy eyeliner....hmmm i dunno wat else to say....i really want a nickname cos i dont like my name....nothing too girlyy plzzzz....cos im EMO!! tehe! hellp me plzzzz????? (link)
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Carousel Crystal (or Cristy)
Carcinogenic Crystal (or Cristie)
Catty Crystal
Caustic Crystal
Cadillac Crissy
Ceramic Crystal
Caution Crystal
Countess Crystal (or Christy)
Cruel Crissy
Cackling Crystal
Cannibal Cryssi
Chaotic Crystal / Chaos Crystal
Clever Crystal
Clinical Crissi
Cocaine Crystal Meth
Cold Crystal /or/ Crystal Cold (!!!)
Communist Crystal
Cracked Crystal
Crystal Cunt (!!!)
Curvy Crystal
Cynical Cristy
Cut-You-Cristy
Feel free to combine some of those and not include your actual name. A decent example would be something like "Clever Cruelty," "Chaotic Cannibal," or "Cackling Carousel." I think I also spelled "Crissy" every way I could think of in case you were stuck on how to spell it.
Although many of them are considered "scene" names more than "emo" they do sound pretty neat and could be used in a variety of ways.
If you perfer to not have your name or the litter "C" associated with it then go for simple, true emo names. I, personally, wouldn't dare call someone something that I've listed below; however, you may find something that sparks your interested, like:
Scars
Blade
Bladed Skin
Razor
Razored Wrist
Painted Razor
Broken Smiles
Weeping Heart
Blackened Raven
Short-Cut (if you're short!)
Red Wrists
Emomo
E-Mo (if you've seen Wall-E then it's cute)
Dark-and-Dreary
Emomo-tional
Poetic Unjustice
[The] Emotionally Wounded [Kid]
Emotional Baggage
Unhappy Bliss (UnBliss for short?)
I hope I found you something above that suited you well. I'm sure a good nickname will come to you soon! If you have any more questions please feel free to ask me! :)
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