Razhie


"This is the true joy in life - being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; being a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances." --George Bernard Shaw

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My official name is Manda, but I've been Razhie for almost as long. I'm a 28 year old woman who didn't use to be half as confident or brazen as she is now.

My advice is pretty good, not always perfect and rarely censored.

I can read what is written. I cannot read your mind.


Razhie. Advicenators Member Since: June 13, 2005. Answers: 5077. Visitors: 211514.

Favourite Collumnists. (WittyUsernameHere.) (karenR.) (NinjaNeer.) (rainbowcherrie.) (DangerNerd.)


    The Question
    Alright, here is the deal.

    I am moving on the 26th of this month. It was a spurr of the moment thing, which I know it's the wisest thing becuase you should have time to save up and plan. But this is just how things have to be.

    I have informed my current employer that I will be moving. I haven't given him a date becuase I'm not sure when exactly I want to quit. The 19th marks the end of the new pay period. I'm scheduled to work three days after that, I'm not sure if it's worth it to work and go through the hassle of trying to get my check that will only be a little over 100.00. Opinions?

    I also just got a job with blockbuster too, I haven't started yet - I got the job before I knew I was even moving. I know it's only worth it to get a second job if I'm really hard up for cash, which I'm not but extra pocket money would be nice. Should I take the second job?

    The Answer
    I think for now it might be best to speak to both of your employers about taking a temporary break.

    If there is something up in your life that demands you move out so quickly, and you were only working part time or less anyways, they would probably be open to discussing a temporary leave rather then you actually quitting.

    If you must quit you current job because of the move please remember that it is polite to give two weeks notice when leaving a job. A simple note saying your last day of work will be the 25th or whatever you choose is fine.

    If you are only planning on working the blockbuster job until you move, you should probably just quit. It costs them a lot of money to train you and begin to employ you, and that is a bit of a waste if you are going to leave in just a week.
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    The Question
    I'll try to make this short...

    Ok I have this friend..yea we use to talk. We talked for like 7 months then this other girl started to like him and then one day someone told me they were together so I asked him. He wouldn't answer me so I went and asked her and she said yea. So I was bein a bitch..and yea me and that guy stopped talkin...ok so nothing has changed between me and him..we stuill hung, kiss and talk, we jsut don't have that "title" anymore..yea NOW he is going out with her..but only to piss me off...he regrets going out with her and he tells me he loves me and wants to be with me. The thing is he doesn't break up with girls. yea but I have to do something to prove that I love him and I kno what he wants...1)for me to play with his dick..or 2)give him head...I am NOT doing #2 and i don't think i feel comfortable with #1...yea but he says that if I want to lose my virginity to him ((which I do)) then I would have no problem playin with his dick. BUT how does that prove I love him?? I just don't kno what to do...HELP ME!?!?!?!

    The Answer
    This boy is scum.

    He has said he will love you and be with you if you if you do sexual things for his pleasure that you are uncomfortable with.

    Oh and he doesn't dump girls. He just plays with them, leads them and pressures them to do sexual things with him.

    I repeat this boy is scum. Stupid, evil, horny scum who thinks he can get some from you if he just keeps leading you on.

    Stop trying to prove you love him because he doesn't love you. Someone who loves you wouldn't date someone else, lead you on, try and make you jealous or pressure you into any sexual activity.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    I'm 25, male.
    Theres this woman I like, Kim (20), who stays in a studenthouse, Sunday I went to visit, about to walk in the back door (frontdoors a mision) when roommate Joe openes the door and stands IN the door, telling me that they are busy studying or something, so I push past and say "then i'll just say hi and bye", two steps from Joe busy making tea stands Kim, with a pissed-off expresion on her face, I just smiled at her saying hi (thinking wtf)... after a minute she warms up to me and acts her old self.
    Thought about this a while, yesterday I send her a sms saying that i thought it was pretty childish to get other people to send her troubles away.
    Later we talk on the phone and she freaks, asking me how I could believe that she would ask her friend to send me away, that she NEVER told Joe to do anything of the kind and didn't know abaout it, that she doesn't need this extra shit in her life and threw a few other pots and pans my general direction and killed the conversation without listering.
    I've always told her to tell me things straight, no matter if she thought it would hurt me, and that it would hurt more later on if she didn't.
    If she needed some time alone she knows that I won't take it personally if she told me that herself.
    One of the things I like about her is that shes not stupid, she was standing 2 steps away hearing everything, if I didn't bardge in I wouldn't have know that she was standing there, besides I not really friends with Joe.
    I'm not stupid, I was honest with myself AND to her about how I feel and how I saw things.
    Anybody willing to give some advice please, I could use some perspective on this, thanks in advance

    The Answer
    She has made herself clear.

    Maybe she didn't talk to you the way you would have liked her too but still you must admit you have gotten her message loud and clear.

    Let me spell it out for you anyways.

    She did not want to see you, for whatever reason she was complicit in her friend sending you away.
    She did not listen to you, but acted violently towards you.
    You confronted her and she was angry and unhappy about it and no expressed desire to speak to you again.

    That communicates her feelings to you very clearly, albeit without the words.

    She doesn't seem capable of a mature explanation of her behavior or of treating you with any respect. Get over it and leave her alone.



    On a slightly unrelated note, if you wanted to enter a mature discussion with her about her desires, accusing of her of being childish was not the best way to do it. Perhaps asking a non-judgmental question next time like "Was something wrong with me coming by on Sunday?" or "Hey what is up with Joe?" might have been a better way to begin.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    My ex and i have been broken up now for a year. He jumped in a relationship 1 week after we were supposedly over,(very long story). 5 mos. into their relationship, he was telling me that he still missed what we had, that he loved me and didnt want me to hurt him (being with other guys) that he thinks about me all the time, and dreams about US! i never gave into my feelings to him since our breakup, (because of the fact that he had sex with this 14 yr old the 2nd date, and ive ahd a hard time thinking about being with him) A year later and i still have alot of feelings for him, and i want to let him know, but not be so blunt. Hes still with his gf, and i really dont know how he feels about me since he told me how he felt 5 mos ago. Im not just gonna come out and ask or just pour out my feelings. We're both seniors, and i want to ask him to exchange pictures, but i dont want to do this at school when hes with "her". I want to do this alone, and i also want to get him to open up to me again!

    Please no immature advice!!!
    Ive been going back and forth on this for a year now and i realize that i want him. I never got involved in another relatinship, but i do have lots of guy friends, but thats all they will ever be to me. It took me 3 yrs to fall in love with my ex, and my heart doesnt want to be with any1 else.

    Remember>he has a gf and i need to do this very consciously, and take things slow!!!
    Thanks!!

    The Answer
    The guy you want has a girlfriend. That is the long and short of it. No mater what else has gone on between you right now he is with someone else and there is nothing you can do about it.

    If he really wanted to break up with her. He would have.

    If you still like him, call him, write him a letter, try to catch him alone for ten mintutes to tell him. Don't try and break them up, don't try to exchange photos or fool around behind her back. Is that really the kind of girl you want to be?

    You said you are seniors, has it occurred to you that you might be acting out of fear. You are growing up and getting ready to move on. This isn't the time to be grasping at a long dead relationship this is the time to start cutting these ties and ending these painful drawn out games. Look forward. Move on. High school is ending, let the high school bullshit die.
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    The Question
    Okay so this kid pretty much took my virginity last year-ish, and we dated for a couple weeks. Since then we've hooked up multiple times, causing him to cheat on his girlfriends at the time, nobody ever found out. Then last summer his girlfriend found out and they stayed together etc, and everything was resolved and they broke up for a while and him and I hooked up. So basically they're back together because he took her virginity too, but I'm the only girl he's ever cheated on her with, and it's not like I'm sprung off him or anything, I don't really even like him like that anymore, we're just friends as far as I'm concerned and we tend to mutally hook up occasionally. So the other day at this thing for school I was having a bad day, and he let me cry on his shoulder and stuff, then we went off to "talk" somewhere and he started kissing me and stuff, I feel really really bad about it for some reason and he's really giving me mixed signals. Is he interested in me again, has he never lost feelings or did he just want a hookup?

    The Answer
    Sounds like this guy never had feelings besides horny and always just wanted to hook up. It's nice that he is kind to you, but pretty clear he isn't interested in a relationship, because if he was why would he be back with his girlfriend and still just using you on the side after so many chances?
    If this is how you want to live your life, fine, but don't fool yourself into thinking this guy cares for you, you are a booty call, nothing else.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    I'm 16 and I've never been in love. I'd just like to know if anyone else out there has ever been in my position, because I really feel alone. All of my friends throw around the word "love" after having a 2 hour bf/gf relationship. But, I'm scared when I'm older that I won't ever have that one person to wake up and want to be with everyday! It like scares me. Had anyone else been in my position?

    The Answer
    At 20 I had never told anyone I loved them. I had had several long term relationships but had explained that that word was very important and weighty to me and I wont use it lightly and would appreciate if they didn't either. None of them did.

    Fear is normal but your patience wont be for nothing. The only difference between you and your friends is that someday you will wake up beside someone who shares your feelings of the importance of the word love. Putting that kind of value and energy into your relationships won't hinder you, it will help you to find a partner like you.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    Okay I am 18/f and I have a wonderful boyfriend. He's 22 and he lives about 1 hour from me because he moved that far to work. He comes to visit me every weekend and calls me every night. We have alot of fun and talk about everything. We have been dating on anf off for 3 years now and are planning on getting married in about 1 1/2. Recently at my work I noticed this guy flirting with me alot, and well I do the same. I saw it as harmless, I would joke with him and stuff and he would back. He had a girlfriend at the time too, but just the other day he walked over to me and pushed me against the wall and said 'watsup babe' and laughed. I found it funny at first but a little odd, then I found out he broken things off with his girlfriend partly because of me. He also slipped me his phone number in my work folder and the other day I saw him he asked me to come to his apartment. I really find him attractive(he looks like the lead singer from my chemical romance) and really like him, I only want to be friends with him because I love my boyfriend so much and wouldnt ever cheat. But when Im around the guy at work Im much more open and talkative then I am with my actual boyfriend. Im just asking if its wrong to be friends with a guy that likes me in a way that my boyfriend wouldnt find appealing?

    The Answer
    You are flirting with disaster.

    I'm not saying you aren't perfectly capable of maintaining a friendship with this guy while remaining faithful to your boyfriend only that your co-worker has decided to make it hard.

    He knows you are in a relationship but he is still making open and sexual advances. That is scummy, it really is. It also isn't the behavior of a friend who respects your choices or your sexual ethics. He thinks you will cheat, or dump your boyfriend for him. Now where did he get that idea?

    If you aren't honest with both guys, you will get trapped in your lies eventually. Tell your boyfriend about your concerns about your friend and that you are going to too set him straight but still be his friend. Then tell your friend you aren't up for cheating and would appreciate if he could respect that and just remain friends.
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    The Question
    SORRY IT'S LONG BUT PLESE HELP
    Ok where do I start?Let me first explain that as a girl I'm not pretty but I'm not ugly either,I don't get attention from boys especially not popular ones I only get attention from older men and other people that I would so not like to date
    But recentley a quite popular boy has seriously been onto me and he tells all my friends and everyone else how much he likes me and how he thinks I like him.He is like really popular and can have any girls in schoool he wants so why me?the thing is I don't actually like him. I mean I want a bf and all cause I've never had one but I'm not that desperate,he's like really sweet and all and my sister and most of my friends like him and think we suit eachother but I just don't see it.I have been trying to come up with plans that can get rid of him but none of them ever suceed and last week I over heard him telling his friend that he was going to ask me out and when he does I don't actually want to say yes but I need a good reason to say no don't I? just incase he asks why I don't want to go all in explaining how I don't feel that way about him so my only option is to say that I already have a bf but I don't like lying so can someone like tell me how to get one and QUICK PLEASE

    The Answer
    You already have a very good reason to not go out with him, you aren't interested.

    You don't need to lie, or make an excuse or anything at all, if he asks you out just say "No thanks." If he insists say "I'm not interested." or even "Sorry, I don't think of you that way."

    Being polite is fine and good but you also have to stand up for what you want. Don't compromise yourself. It's okay to not want to date someone who wants to date you.
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    The Question
    My boyfriend is cheating on me and he is totally affensive about the whole thing i woult like to know how could you break the love of your life heart with out breaking yours thanks holla atb me

    The Answer
    If he is cheating on you, his heart isn't yours and you can't break it.

    There is nothing you can do to him that is as bad as what he as done to you.

    Don't even bother trying. There is nothing.

    Hurting him will only hurt you. I think from your question you realize that and the whole goal now should be not to hurt anymore.

    Dump him and focus on your own happiness and pleasure. Just you. Have a sundae, a bubble bath, take a ride and just keep doing it untill the pain stops.
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    The Question
    long story short:
    I went to a party met a really cool guy there and now we're pretty deep
    it's been like a year now and he asked me if we could *blush* you know what.
    I'm sooooooooooo not ready beCAWZ we are both erm, young totally not the time until we've got our lives together.
    So anyway I heard a rumor about how he's been creeping around with other chicks going into hotels then the next thing i know my girl calls me up spitting bs because she saw him with this girl in his backseat ((sooooo not cool))
    I asked him and he said no.
    here is my question:
    My girl never lies to me we're blood ((blood sisters but not like that))
    but she could be jealous but so many people have said it and said it was like a different girl every night. I really dont want things to end but they just might
    WHAT DO I DO?!!-signed.
    WULA!

    The Answer
    If asking him straight up hasn't gotten you a decent answer then THERE IS A PROBLEM.

    Your guy should be able to put your doubts to rest. Being in an honest and secure relationship should be a top priority for him as well as you. If he can't even talk about the rumors without getting defensive or childish or just flat denying em, then it doesn't matter what the truth is, it wont last with him.

    Besides that, the truth, as I believe you have already decided, is that he is playing you. If you can live with that, fine. But if you can't then things have to end.
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    The Question
    If you don't look at somebody in the eyes...do they get upset or something or feel like they did something wrong? Im really bad at eye contact. It makes me feel weird knowing somebodys eyes are staring right at me..

    The Answer
    Eye contact does seem to have an effect on peoples perspections of you. People who make eye contact are considered more confident and trustworthy and such.

    Personally, I hate making eye contact. I have very poor eye sight and it is exhausting for me, so, and please don't laugh now, I tend to look at peoples noes. It relaxes me and people generally can't tell the difference.
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    The Question
    sorry this is long, and full of profanities, but i seriously cant take it anymore.

    hey i dont know who is going to be up at 10 oclock on a Sunday, but of course i am. You see, i really hate my dad. Time after time he makes me so pissed off and annoyed at him, and i just cannot stand it. Like this morning, he wakes me up at 8 30 to go to church, and then he fucking leaves without me because i "wasnt ready!" Now i have to go by myself and after church i was supposed to have plans with my friend i havent seen in 2 months and i cant even do that! This morning i was writing an away message and he tells my little sister to turn off the computer because i was on for too long and i was "ignoring him" so she turns it off! like wtf? so i slam in the keyboard drawer because i was so pissed off, and it fucking broke! now im in trouble for breaking the keyboard, and not going to mass. Finally, my dad is angry at me because i bought too many songs on iTunes. The bill was 20 dollars.
    Who cares?! 20 bucks is not a lot for buying music that me and my brother listen too, and this doesnt even happen every month! Usually its like 5 bucks!
    You may think im being like stuck up or bratty over this, but this is how it is for me day after day. I hate my dad and im always mad at him and i wish he would leave my mom so i wouldnt have to deal with him anymore. I go to a very hard high school, and i manage to get A's and B's so i think he should be damn proud of that. can anyone help me? how can i work things out with my dad?
    =[

    The Answer
    I don't know how to say this nicely but it sounds like you are being inconsiderate.

    Sure your father could be dealing with his anger a bit better. But if you are holding people up, charging money to his account without arranging it with him before hand, and taking out your anger on rather expensive things like keyboards, it's not your dad with a problem, it's you.

    If something is important to you, like downloading your music or seeing your friend, then you should be responsible enough to communicate that to your father before hand. A simple "Dad I think the itunes bill is going to be higher this month." Or "I'm really looking forward to church tomorrow so I can see my friend." would probably have been enough to diffuse this whole situation and earned some understanding from your father.

    It just sounds to me like the communication between you and your father has broken down, and you are just as responsible for that as he is.
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    The Question
    sorry it's so long, and please look at this in an open-minded manner, and i'm not looking for answers that say you're waiting for marriage so i'm a slut. i'll rate high if you tried, and low if you're ignorant.

    my ex-boyfriend broke up in august and aren't dating exclusively, but we still hook-up from time to time. hooking up meaning having sex. we had sex today, and then i went to the movies with one of my close guy friends. we went back to my guy friend's house and we had sex. i really want to forget it ever happened and not tell anybody, though. the guy promised he wouldn't tell, and i trust him. the thing is, if it gets out somehow, and my ex-boyfriend finds out, he'll hate me. should i tell him or just let it slide? by the way, i'm on birth control and i only have sex with a condom.

    The Answer
    You aren't in any relationship with your ex that extends beyond the bedroom. You aren't exclusive, you aren't even dating. You don't owe him this information about you and your guy friend.

    If he finds out and is angry, well that's just too damn bad. Yes, you might loose your hook-ups with him over this even though you did nothing wrong, but as long as you have been clear with him that the relationship is not exclusive then you haven't done anything technically wrong.

    I would suggest though, that you reexamine what it takes to get you into bed. An ex is an ex for a reason, going back to that relationship in any way will always cause trouble, it is so emotionally charged.

    Open minded or not, when you behave the way you are, whether people thing you are a slut or not, their opinion of you is probably going to go down. It's good that you guard yourself physically, but emotionally you are banging yourself around, and these guys as well.

    Just have some self-respect and sensitivity in your dealings with sex and the you'll reduce the drama and pain in your life.


    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    Hey...my roommate (20/f) was in a horrible relationship recently and she's kind of afraid to start dating again. There's this guy that really likes her and he seems pretty nice. However, he's shorter than her, which she doesn't like, and he's pretty clingy. They've slept together before, they didn't do anything, so she was totally leading him on and everything. She hangs out with him still sometimes, but she always complains to me about how annoying he is. I know that she liked him at one point, but I'm not sure if she still does, it's really hard to tell. I know that it makes her feel bad whenever I say something about my boyfriend because she's lonely. Should I encourage her to date him and if so how? I really want her to get over her new phobia of relationships! Any advice would be great!

    The Answer
    Encourage her to date sure, but please God don't encourage her to date him. She doesn't like him, doesn't seem to take him or his feelings seriously, and basically seems uninterested in him, no matter how much he adores her, it wont work.

    The relationship phobia is normal and natural; it's a time for reflection and learning. Your friend will pull out of it when she is ready too, pushing her into another bad relationship would only make it worse. Encourage her to do what she wants to do, it sounds like she needs some more time before she decides to see anyone in earnest again.

    It's good that are concerned with about your friend's feelings, but in seriousness, you should be able to talk about your boyfriend with her without her breaking into tears. You are different people in different relationships; she can probably deal with that. Coddling her wont help her move on any more then rushing her into another relationship will.
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    The Question
    Sometimes I think that people are afraid to tell me how they really feel on a lot of issues. Not only am I very sensitive but I'm aware that I'm a very controlling person. I also have very high 'standards' for my friends. So I'm afraid that they don't feel like they can tell me everything, because I will judge them or I will get angry. Sometimes I even think that my friends are only my friends because theyre scared of me, and they think that having me as a friend is a lot better than having me as an enemy.

    How do I tell them that I don't plan to change who I am, but I want them to be honest with me without fear of me judging them or hating them?

    The Answer
    You have said that you don't want your friends to be afriad of speaking to you but all you have given in your questions is reasons for them to be afriad of your opinions. No reasons why they should open up to you.

    It really worries me that not once in your question you said anything like "but I still really love my friends and want them to trust me."

    Lets face facts darling, if you can't offer simple reasurances like "I promise I wont hate you just because I don't agree." or "I promise not to yell at you and make you cry" then you don't deserve thier confidence.

    This isn't about changing who you are, this is about respecting your friends and thier descisions and trying to be the best person you can be.

    Don't tell your friends they can trust you, Show them. Don't judge them or get angry with them over little stupid things and they will be more likely to come to you with the important things.
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    The Question
    Hi Razhie,

    Thanks for answering my question.
    You said that my supervisor might not be training me because she thinks I might go back to school or leave, well she knows this is not true.

    Infact, I am the only girl of all the ones working in this department that told her I could work any shifts, all the others have limited hours.

    So my question to you is if she knows I am willing to work any hours and I have no intention on leaving, then why isnt she training me?

    I am so depressed, I finally got a good job and then this happens.

    The other bad thing is that everyone knows I got the job so they will be asking me about it.

    What should I say to my boss?

    The Answer
    Frankly I have no idea why she isn't training you then, I really don't.

    As for speaking to her, I would, as calmly and respectfully as possible, ask her why she is not scheduling you for shifts. Don't threaten to leave right away, or compare yourself to other who are getting the shifts, just ask her straight up, and listen to what she says.

    Remind her of your desire to work, give her a set ammount of hours to work each week (make sure it's reasonable for both of you, like don't ask for 40 if she only hired you part time) And leave it be.

    She might respond right away, call you in for shifts or adding you in. If you are willing to wait it out, wait untill the next schedule comes out and see if you are on it.

    If your not, just quit, if they aren't even scheduling you there isn't much point in giving them two weeks notice anyways.

    As for people asking you about the job, just tell 'em management are having some scheduling problems and you'll be working as soon as you can.

    Good Luck darling.
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    The Question
    13/f/ny

    My ex-best friend Maggie is such a jerk!!

    We had a fight and decided not to be friends anymore, because she totally used me to come over to my (big) house, swim in my (inground) pool, and just get away from her own house. i have proof that she did that too - cuz one time i got sick when she was over and she swam and hung out with my little bro & sis all day while i was up in bed throwing up!!!!

    Now she is telling everyone rumours about me and being such a brat. she told everyone on our bus who i like. she told him too. she told everyone all the secrets i used to tell her..even the old ones. i want to get back at her..but i don't. i mean, i'm sort of the girl that NEVER does anything mean and people even call me a goody goody or whatever.

    i am really fed up with maggie! what should i do to get her to stop making up things about me and telling all my secrets! i could tell all of her secrets to everyone..but to tell you the truth i actually don't know any (it was sort of a one sided relationship..i cared about her but she didnt give a crap about me)

    thanx! ~rach~

    The Answer
    Let it go.

    Seriously. You've already admitted there is nothing you can do to her that is as bad as the way she has used you and that you don't really want to hurt her. So don't try.

    If you want to be the better person here, shrug your shoulders, cry out the betrayal and pain, and next time be a little more wary of people.

    Ignore her. She has probably run out of secrets by now, so just ignore her. Whatever she says just roll your eyes and say "Aren't you bored with that yet?"

    She isn't worth the trouble and neither is anyone who takes what she says seriously. So just worry about your own happiness and let her do what she wants.
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    The Question
    wondered if there are any advice on this topic. i don't mind players, as long as they don't play me... are there any signs to tell if a woman is looking for more than just (pretty shallow) fun?

    The Answer
    How about:

    "Hi there pretty lady, are you looking for a fun roll in the hay or a deep emotional connection and long term relationship?"

    Okay, it's not really that easy I know.

    But in my experience most 'players' do tell the 'playee' that they are getting played. The 'playee' just refuses to hear it and instead just hears how much they love them and adore them and just aren't ready for that kinda relationship... and so on and so on.

    The best way to spot a player is too keep your eyes and ears open. Listen to what they actually say and not just what you are hoping they will. If you hear something that concerns you, ask them to elaborate or explain.

    Ask deep questions to a shallow person and they come up covered in mud.
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    The Question
    what options are available for a marketing manager where a competing brand have been introduced to all the areas he was selling before at cheap prices?

    The Answer
    This sounds terribly like a homework question darling, which a lot of people may decline answering.

    Of the top of my head though, to compete with a cheaper substitute product you want to increase your value in the costumer mind, that can be done through things like warrantees and purchasing experience or to differentiate your product in some other way, maybe it's more stylish, comes in more colours, is smaller or some such.

    Take a look at the ipod. There are plenty of other products out there that are cheaper and do pretty much the same thing. But people still buy the ipod, a lot. Why is that?

    Those are by no means the only answers. Good luck.
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    The Question
    I just started a new job at a Superstore in the Apparal department. The store hasnt opened yet so right now we are doing the set up.

    I am concerned because I've only had two shifts since I got called in last week. My boss called me in to work today, we had a two hour orientaition about health and safety. But get this, after the orientation everyone else in my department got jobs to do, and me and another lady got sent home!!! Then I found out that everyone else except me and this other lady had been called in all this week and had been getting tons of hours!! I asked my boss when my next shift would be and she said "I'll call you".
    I have a really bad feeling and so does this other lady, neither of us has had a shift since last wednesday.
    I don't understand why everyone else is getting hours except us.
    Should I start looking for another job? And should I ask my boss what the heck is going on?

    The Answer
    You definitely need to ask your boss what is going on, and if there is any problem. But I'll give you this to think on too.

    I've been on crew opening three different stores now, and in each case, they have overstaffed at first. They always hire more people then they need because people always seem to leave before the store opens anyways.

    If the manager has you pegged as someone who will leave soon after it opens or as soon as school is in, then they aren't too worried about training you or making you happy.

    This doesn't mean you should stick with the job, only you can make the choice if it is worth it for you, just something to consider.

    A little rule for life, ALWAYS keep yours ears open for good jobs, even if you don't have the skills for them yet, apply to them. It's a great learning experience and you might just land a dream job. Don't stop looking altogether just cause you have a job, don't be afriad to shoot for the stars.
    (View All Other Answers.)



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