about

I'm a mother of 2 boys who are 13 months apart. Talk about a handful. I'm a wife to the best husband I could have ever dreamed of.
I'm one of the very blessed.


I have Bipolar 1 Disorder. I hate taking all these medications and always going to doctors appointments, but life is too short to let mental illness get the better of me.


Often times life is a challenge, and nobody knows that better than me. I wake up wondering if this is going to be a day my illness overpowers my meds, and either sends me flying like a bat out of hell, or leaves me laying on the couch like a wet dish rag.


Thank all that is good in the world that I have an excellent support system at home.
I'm one of the lucky ones.


I'm honest, and that can either be a perk or s flaw. Depends on how you choose to look at it.
I like to see it as a perk, because it's better to hear the truth than to be told candy coated bullshit.






advice

i have a wonderful friend that i love with all my heart. but her and her old friend became really good friends again. and im okay with her old friend but i think shes a bad person for her to be hanging out wtih. i mean she smokes and does drugs. and has a reputation as a hoe, and she lies ALOT to my friend. dont get me wrong i think shes cool and everything but i just dont want my friend to turn into her or get her reputation. any advice?
thanks

I'd be sure to remind her not to allow herself to be influenced by her friend's actions. Remind her of the dangers of smoking, drugs, and sex.

Make sure you remind her of the FACTS, not school yard myths. Do that buy studying the risks of those things yourself. You have to admit, such risks are good for you to remind yourself about, too. Knowledge is power, as the saying goes.

Other than that, you can't stop her from making her own choices in this life. If she wants to be friends with the other girl, you can't stop that.
You can, however, look out for her.

ygs-30/f

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I need some advice FAST I want to know what to do about my boyfriends son, I think he was molested by another boy when he was younger. He is on the verge of telling us. He is 22 yrs old. He has alot of rage inside of him, he has just beat up his girlfriend & talks of thoughts of killing people.
How do we handle this when he tells us (which I suspect is the molestation I mentioned) What is the appropriate thing to say & then do after the fact. He does not trust or like alot of people, I'm afraid of where he is headed

Maybe this can help:

http://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/2656/adultsurv.html

I got that link from the following page, which you may find helpful, also:

http://www.geocities.com/hotsprings/2656/

I wish nothing but the best of luck to you in helping this young man overcome his past.

ygs-30/f

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me and my mom never get along i feel like she doesnt even care aboout me, like yesterday for instance i was sick and wasnt feelin good but did she care no. i wait on her hand and foot almost all the time when she was sick which is a lot but when i just asked her to get me one thing she said no she was to busy paying attention to her stupid cat who she acted like he was sick when he wasn.t and if i even moved she would be like, did she scare you im sorry to the cat. were not rich or anything but she cares more about that stupid cat than anyone else.also there was another time i was sick and i asked her to help me find the thermometerbut she was to busy watching tv so i had to find it myself when i was sick! please help!

Have you tried to sit down with her and talk about how you feel?
I mean talking that doesn't end up an argument. When talking becomes heated, everyone speaks, but nobody listens.

ygs-30/f

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i m a 18year old girl.i m in a relationship for past 8 mnths.my boyfriend has confessed tht he had oral sex with a 3 girls before me...but knw he loves me ..i believe him tht he is compleletly changed. but still their is dilama in my mind about what i dnt knw..i want tht he shud regret over it like anything... wht shuld i do.. help mee

Ok, so this happened before you came along. It is in the past, therefore, it has nothing to do with you.
Why let it affect you?

Say, 10 years from now you meet a 28 year old guy you eventually want to marry. (I'm just saying as an example, by the way.) Would you expect this guy to have no kind of past with women? Because chances are, a 28 year old man has.

Don't let things affect you that have no bearing on you or your relationship.
Realize that his confession is a GOOD thing. He is comfortable enough with your relationship to trust you with such intimate details about his life.

ygs-30/f

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Just out of curiousity, is it considered wrong to wear a bikini at a public pool or beach if you are pregnant?

No.
Why would it be?

Check out this image:

http://images1.comstock.com/Imagewarehouse/TS/SITECS/NLWMCompingVersions/B0012/B0012612/B0012612.jpg

What's so wrong about that?
I guess it's all really depends on the pregnant woman's personal taste. It matters not what others think.


ygs-30/f

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13/female

okay so i like this guy and hes 18 and my parents dont approve. i see age as just a number. and hes not the type that just wants some. so how do i get my parents to compromise with me?

Age is only a number, but in your particular situation, the age difference is illegal.
In the eyes of the law, you are a 13 year old child, he is an 18 year old man.

I very highly doubt that your parents will compromise on this one.

ygs-30/f

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Hey im 17/f my boyfriend of about 2 weeks broke up with me, cuz he said he wasnt over his ex girlfriend. I saw him holding hands with his ex girlfriend like 2 days after we broke up. Then a couple days later he decides he does want me instead of her.. it just took him some time to realize this. I was really hurt and now my mom doesnt like him anymore because of what he did. But he decided that he is over her and wants me. Is there any way i can convince my parents that he is actually a good guy. They are very hard to convince my mom is stubborn! Thanks a bunch!

Well, it sucks that he did that. Then again, at least he was decent enough to break up with you until he could sort out his feelings in this particular situation.

Perhaps if your parents got to know him, they could make better judgment on this young fellow?
See about inviting him over to dinner with your family. Both of you spend the evening with your parents so they can have the chance to get to know him.

I don't know if it will help, or if they will even go for it, but it's worth a shot.

ygs-30/f

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Well, you see I'm posting this question for my best friend. Just so you know, she's 12 and is going to be 13 in another week or so. I wanna help her out, being best friends and all. So yeah, I'll just get to the point. Today she told me on myspace about how her boyfriend N told her to stop talking to one of her guy friends O. She asked him why and he was like 'cuz i'm your boyfriend, thats why.' i mean, that is being way too overprotective. she told me she was so happy when he left and about how he was being too clingy and calling her every minute of the day. ShesI just really want to help her out...wat should she do abt this? and please dont tell me about how she should deal with this by herself. i kmow!!! I just wanna help!!!

That's not overprotective, it's controlling.
Your friend isn't a robot to be programed.
Seriously, if he is going to treat her that way, she'd do better to be single.
At least then she can be who she is, have the friends she wants to have, and search for a guy who accepts that.

ygs-30/f

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I recieved an e-mail stating,John Hopkins news letter claiming : #1. No plastic containers in microwave. #2. No water bottles in freezer. #3. No plastic wrap inmicrowave.
Is this factual?
Tom

Personally, I don't trust emails unless they are replying to something I sent them myself.
Best place to find this information is from John Hopkins, directly. Check out their web page.
That way, you know for sure it comes from a reliable source.

ygs-30/f

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I posted a question about the dogs in my house fighting a while back. well, I have now found out that it is in fact my dog that initiates these fights. He has shown some very bad signs in the past year, he nipped my son's face (there is no more contact between them since) and lately he has been starting very vicious fights with my boyfriend's dog. Well, I see that my dog is not good to have around because I cannot trust him with my child around and so he barely gets enough attention from me and now he is fighting with his only other companion. I love this dog so much, he is so obedient to me and shows me so much love...but I know I cannot have him, especially since my boyfriend says I have to get rid of him. I cannot take him to the shelter because he will get euthanized, and if I take him to the no-kill shelter I am afraid no one would want him because I would have to tell them he is not good with kids or other animals. I love my dog but know I cannot have him, what should I do? Any ideas would help. thanks

There are many people who don't have kids around who love dogs. Especially loving, obedient dogs.

I understand the love you have for your dog. I'm a dog lover, too. Every dog I've ever had was a family member. However, when that family member becomes untrustworthy and potentially dangerous, we have to keep them away from our kids, as much as that can hurt our hearts to do that.

Take him to the no-kill shelter. Like I said, somebody out there doesn't have kids and other animals, and they will be glad to provide him a loving home. That is your best bet right now, considering word of mouth most likely won't get him out of your home as quickly.

I know you probably think that a rude thing to say- get him out quickly. But being a mother, also, I'd say quickly is the best thing. He's nipped your son's face and is getting a bad temperament. If he were to do more than nip your son, what would his fate be then?
Best not to put your son, your dog, yourself, into that position.

I know it's hard and it hurts, but take him to that shelter.

ygs-30/f

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ok so some of my friends that are mostly girls (but im a boy) are starting to say stuff to me that im getting really annoying and i want to try to stop being annoying cause i like this girl but she thinks im a it annoying so my questions are
a.what are things that guys do to annoy girls

b.what are ways for a guy to stop being annoying

c.what do guys find annoying that other guys do
and..
d.what can i do to stop being annoying to other guys

btw any other information would be a great help
and im 13/boy

thanks

Listen. Everybody in the world finds somebody annoying.
That doesn't mean it's a good thing to change who you are to please someone else.
So you like this girl. I get it. If she doesn't like you for who you are, then she's not for you.
I know that's not what you want to hear, but if you try to change who you are, then you'll be a fake.
Speaking from the female standpoint: I'd rather be with someone who is annoying than someone who is fake.

ygs-30/f

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uh yeah i spilled a bottle of red nail polish on my beige carpet... and i went to this site:

http://www.thriftyfun.com/tf205186.tip.html

and i tried EVERYTHING. i tried...

1.) nail polish remover
2.) windex
3.) shaving cream

and the nail polish remover is the only thing that got most of it out. the stain is still totally visible. i tried the windex alone and it did nothing...

now, if anyone has any other suggestions besides calling a carpet cleaner in order to get the stain COMPLETELY out without spending tons of money, let me know. but until then... i want to call a carpet cleaner (actually i'm 15f but my parents agreed to call one). naturally, i googled "carpet cleaners new jersey" and all these search results came up. but what about cleaning a SINGLE stain? would a carpet cleaner do that? or would they have to clean my entire carpet because the one spot would be whiter than the rest of my carpet?

feel free to make any further suggestions about the nail polish stain besides a carpet cleaner. i'm really embarrassed about it and i really wish i hadn't accidentally tipped it over. i know everyone makes mistakes but i'm supposed to have a friend over tomorrow and it's no big deal but it's a long stream about two and a half feet long and as much as four inches wide in some parts (the bottle kept rolling). i'm really upset so if anyone can make any further suggestions? the stain is like, three days old now

Ok, so this may not be what you are looking for...

You don't have to hire a carpet cleaner.
You can rent a Rug Doctor for about $20 per day. Clean all you want, or as little as you want in a day. They are easy to run steam cleaners, and the instructions are on the machine.
Unless you have carpet shampoo, you'll have to buy some of that. But you can use it for many, many future carpet cleanings.

Helpful hint- If you DO rent a Rug Doctor, get yourself a bottle of Shout, and spray the stain with that first. Let it set for 15-30 minutes, then clean the carpet.

Now, I'm not sure where you'd rent one where you live. I live in a small town, and in our area they can be rented at the grocery store or the lumber yard.

ygs-30/f

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Sorry if this is going to be really long but I have a feeling someone out there might be able to help :]. O.k. so I'm 16/f and I've been looking for a summer job for quite some time now. I've applied to about 15 places but no ones called me back :[. Recently, about 2 days ago I applied to two places that seemed really promising, places that wouldn't just throw my application in a pile, this is because they were hiring which definitely helps. I haven't heard back from them yet but yesterday someone finally called me back and asked to set up an interview! Unfortunately this was my last choice, seriously out of every job this was the last one I'd chose but I agreed to the interview. I figured I'd be stupid to pass up the only place that actually called me. I have an interview today in about two hours but I'm afraid if I accept the job the other two places that seemed promising might call and I'll be stuck somewhere I really didn't want to be. I mean I'd feel too guilty quitting for a better offer, that's terrible. But I'll also feel stupid if I don't accept this job because what if the other two places never call. I guess my question is, does anyone have any ideas as to any of this? I probably sound so ignorant but I'm honestly in quite a pickle and help would be much appreciated.

For future reference:
When you apply for a job, don't sit and wait for them to call you. Call them and ask them "Have you had a chance to review my application?" Do that every day until they either say come for an interview, or sorry, position filled.

Doing that shows them that you are eager to work for them. They will be far more likely to hire the eager caller over the one who sits and waits. ;-)

If you get offered a better job, you aren't a bad person to take it. If this other place hires you first, be sure to give them notice that you are quitting.

Inform the better job that you have to give notice, and they will surely wait for you.
Employers appreciate hiring someone who shows they won't just up and quit on them without giving them fair warning.

ygs-30/f

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I just had my baby boy on the 4th of July.
He was a long awaited arival and I am over joyed that he is here.
Ever since my fiance and I brought him home though, I've felt really sad.
I had a bad pregnancy, but now that it's over, I miss it a lot.
My Fiance just went back to work and now I feel extremely overwhelemd. . . I feel like crying all the time.
My baby sleeps a lot, but since Ross has returned to work he seems to be up more or harder to settle down.
I don't know if any of this is normal or what. . .I could use some advice.

Congratulations!
I've been there. I have a 16 month old and a 3 month old.
Bluntly- You need to talk to your pregnancy doctor about this.
The "Baby Blues" is very common postnatal, because of all of the hormonal changes, and a lot of times, that feeling of emptiness.

It's scary when you get really sad and depressed... You should be happy and enjoying your baby. Right? Ah... But that doesn't always work out that way. Feelings of being overwhelmed, feelings of sadness that won't go away, feelings that you can't do this/handle this.
Those are among the signs of Postpartum Depression.

PPD is NOTHING to be ashamed of. You can't help it that you feel that way. It just happens, and more women have or are suffering with it than you'd think.
Only your doctor can diagnose and treat it.
I strongly advise you talk to your doctor about how you feel, ASAP, so you can figure out a way to work through this so you CAN enjoy motherhood, as you deserve to.

As for baby's sleep patterns, they sleep a lot at first. Seems the first week that they are seldom awake. If he's harder to settle down at night, he's probably got his days and nights mixed up, which is very common.
What we did with our boys was when they had their alert times during the day, we would talk to them, etc. to try to keep them from falling back asleep. More alert time during the day means less alert time at night. And I know all too well how much you need that sleep at night!

Lack of sleep doesn't help when you're feeling blue. Try to catch naps when your baby does during the day. (This was VERY hard for me to accomplish with my little one- my oldest was walking and getting up to mischief during the day. I caught a nap during his nap time.)

With both of mine, it seemed the first month was one of the harder ones. After the first month, you can start to see a light at the end of the tunnel- It may not be much longer before he sleeps through the night. Though being a mom is trying at times, it's easier to keep a handle on things when you aren't walking around half asleep all day.

If I can do anything else to help, feel free to hit up my inbox.

ygs-30/f

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my boyfriend and i have been together for almost 3 years. we have a baby together and live together. we broke up for a period of 2 months and just 3 weeks ago, he moved back in, and we are going through couples counseling to try and work things out. everytime i even look in the direction of another man, i get world war 3 in my ear. every little movement i make is questioned...he even goes as far as looking at my cell phone constantly. clearly, he does not trust me, and to be honest, i dont trust him that much either, which is why we are going through counseling to work out our issues and built ourselves up. however, there is a girl that lives upstairs from us (we live in an apt. building) and she lives with her boyfriend and their one year old son. my boyfriend is friends with her boyfriend and i am cool with the both of them. i dont talk to them much, but have no problems with them and they seem like nice people that i could definately get to know. my boyfriend goes up there sometimes to hang out with them. well, her boyfriend went to jail a few days ago and my boyfriend continues to go up there. he goes up there at least once a day for a while at a time. some of her friends and family are up there most of the time, so her and my boyfriend are never alone. they all just hang out up there. however, i do not feel it is fair for him to be up there as much as he is since it DOES make me uncomfortable. just the fact that my man is constantly going to another females apt. time after time really gets under my skin. plus, when you look at the big picture, he is CONSTANTLY picking at every move i make(the trust issues) and constantly checking everything i do and everyone i look at and so forth. we have been arguing about this for the past week because my point is: if your girlfriend is uncomfortable with you going to another females apt. ALL the time, then you stop. no question about it. there should be no comparison and not even a fight about it. that girl should not mean nearly as much to him as i do, so it shouldnt matter. he says he is allowed to have friends and yes of course he is! but after all the crap i hear from him about what IM doing, i dont think its fair for him to get to run around and do whatever he wants and it should be okay. he said we dont have friends unless there mutual, and i agreed, even though i feel its rediculous. he said that because when we got back together, i had new friends that he didnt know. and, now that its time for HIM to follow his OWN rules, everything changes and it doesnt apply. and besides, this friend isnt mutual. he asks me to come up there and im always busy or doing something with the baby so i dont go. but flat out, if your girl isnt okay with something like that, then it should end there. any suggestions or opinions???

Sounds to me like this guy has serious control issues. You are a person, not a robot to be programed. If he wants things to work between you guys (which he REALLY needs to want that- there is a child involved) then he needs to work on his control issues in counseling.
Seriously... He needs to step back and look at his behavior. Would he want someone treating his CHILD that way?

No, it isn't right that he's going up there. Sure, she's a mutual friend and all, but in all honesty, SHE needs to come down and hang out with BOTH of you, rather than him going up to her. You would surely find that a comfortable arrangement, right?

If she's your friend, she'll do it that way. If not, some friend, aye?

ygs-30/f

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Kind of curious.... Im getting married to a wonderful man, and I thought until yesterday that we had been completly honest with each other, well some how we got on the subject of having kids, and we have talked about it before and we boh have agreed we wanted them, well yesterday he was like if it's possible. So I guess before we were ever together he got in an accident and got kicked by a bull down there and he says he cant have kids..... why didn't he tell me this earlier, but Im not going to not get married to him over that but is there any way that we could still have kids together or atleast one of our own? I really kinda upset by it but I guess I was just really looking foreward to starting a family. Sorry its so long.

Maybe he waited so long to tell you because it's something he's self conscious about? Perhaps deep inside he may have thought you'd think him a lesser man. You never know. I wouldn't stress over that.

As for having kids or not, he can go in and have a fertility test done to see. The question of your specific chances of having a child between the two of you is something best asked to your doctor.

When you get married, then eventually decide it's time to try, don't stress over getting pregnant. Stressing makes it harder.

Example: A friend of mine and her husband have been trying to have a baby for nearly 2 years now. They "tried" for quite some time to no avail. One day, they decided to just not take pregnancy precaution, and if it happens, it happens.
What do you know... About 2 months later they discover they're expecting.

Best of luck to you both!

ygs-30/f

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all of my relatives have had and lived or are living with or died of cancer. iv been to so many funerals an i hate myself cause i can't even cry at them i think its not use. iv ben dealing with it my whole life but i just don't know what to do anymore its crushing me. now my mom thinks i may have cancerous mole but she doesnt wana scare me cause iv been having an extremely hard time lately. i also have a brown bump on my nipple.. iv had it for a very long time but its just getting bigger little by little n its kinda freakin me out. is that cancer to? what do i do, i really don't wana go to the hospital, for many reasons, one being i kinda ben skipping it bc theyve ben doing all these different testings on me but not having to do with cancer. i dont wana go back for one that they go in and look threw me, they did alot of blood and weird rays tests. idk what to even think or do anymore but i dont wana go. :( btw im 14 female

You got to look at it like this: If it is a cancerous mole, the sooner it's discovered and treated, the better. It's not something that will just go away in time. Cancer is something that gets worse. I know you know that.

What they'll do is check out your suspicious mole. They will remove it, then send it in to the lab for testing. That is the only way you will find out if it is cancerous or not.

No person can tell you just by looking at it or hearing your description. Only lab results will answer your question, and if you and your mother are concerned about this mole, those lab results are exactly what you need.

If it ends up being just a pesky old mole, then think of the relief you'll have in knowing.

ygs-30/f

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ignorance is bliss
what does that mean?
and what does this mean?
if ignorance is bliss, why arent more people happy?

I think it kinda coincides with "What you don't know won't hurt you."

ygs-30/f

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I had a great teacher in my old school, I still live in the same town, but I changed schools.
I hadn't seen the teacher for a year, until last week I went to pick up some stuff that I ordered, and stopped at Starbucks. There he was (I'll name him Simon to make things easier) and I was happy to see him, he turned around and he was all happy and smiling and said ''Hey, name, I haven't seen you for over a year!'' and yes we hugged.
I'm almost 16, and he's a young teacher, I think about 24. We sat in Starbucks for about 6 hours, drinking and talking, and I found out that he's not with his girlfriend anymore and I don't know...I just like him so much.
He's always been relaxed. Like when I was going through shit times, I started smoking (I quit, and I'm proud :) ) and once I was sitting in the park near our school smoking and tears running down my face. He sits next to me, I tell him about all the shit that happened, and he helped me sort everything out.
I basically have no secrets from him, and since that day at Starbucks, I've seen him again twice.
We kiss each other on the cheek to say hello and bye, but practically no other physical contact.
I have fun with him, and I care for him..and I know so much about him but if any of my friends knew..well they'd be jealous cause he's pretty good looking, but I'm not sure what they'd think.
He is an ex teacher, but my friends still have him as a teacher.
I've only told my best friend from my new school, and she thinks it's cool, but she said that if he was one of her teacher, and knew that he was kissing me, she'd feel really uncomfortable.

And is it illegal...that's my main concern?
He taught me for a year, and now I go to a different school. I'm almost 16.

So confused and lost..

Is it illegal? I'd wager it probably is, but I'm uncertain. He is STILL a teacher, and you are STILL a student, different school or not.

ygs-30/f

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My boyfriend and I just recently started messing around. And by messing, I don't mean sex. He's been fingering me, and going down on me very frequently.

My concern is that I've been feeling very itchy and irritated down there, on my inner lips and near the hole.

Is it possible that 3rd base can give me and STD? I've looked for this on websites and I'm just not getting the answer I need.

I have no trouble peeing, and I'm not feeling bumps or having foul odor. It's simply itchy, irritated and a small bit of discharge.

Has anyone ever experienced this? If so, what can I do to prevent whatever it may be?

Thank you in advance.

It may be a yeast infection.
I can't honestly tell you if you can contract an STD that way.
Realistically, if you are concerned you may have an STD, getting checked by a medical professional would be the best thing for you to do.

ygs-30/f

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