piratechicka's advice column

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Q: Im in love with my best friend Danny. But the thing is...hes gay and he obviously doesnt like me, but hes so sweet and I really love him with all my heart. And i asked my friend Dylana to talk about it with him. he said he is uncomfortable with the fact that hes gay, and im his best BEST friend and we have known each other for years.But i cant help it. he knows i like him and hes avoiding me latly. Hes home schooled but i will call him and he says hes too busy to talk, but when dylana talks to him, he is never busy. please help me. I want danny to talk to me again!

Hi ya rachel! You should ask friends to hang out with you and Danny. Oh and Danny isn't busy this one weekend so you can come over here since he lives across my street! but it has to be Next month before summer school starts! LOVE YA! BYE!!!!!! DOGS RULE!!!!!!!!!

Q: ok, so i keep hearing this piano key sound...a high pitch and i know no one in my family is playing piano cause it's obviously really late, 3 in the morning...
i was just finished watching movie, and then i suddenly started to hear this e very few minutes, i'm getting scared to hell, what should i do?!?!

Check around the house. Maybe something is pushing on something else making this noise. If you can't find anything making the noise, maybe your just hearig things. Or it's just the sound of the movie playing in your head. It happens to me.

Q: All of the other girls I know are always just SO happy and smiling all the time no matter what, it's like nothing could ever upset them.

I, however, am always frowning and mad/depressed looking and I can't help it. I just never feel happy. I have never been truly happy and whenever I do smile it's fake unless I'm laughing at something.

And the happy little perky ones are the ones who attract the most boys. Isn't it true that men are attracted to happy women?

I want to know how to be all happy and perky and cheerful and pleasant all the time. I've tried thinking happy thoughts but it just doesn't work. I only think about things that make me pissed, because my life is filled with them, and things about myself that I hate (plenty of those too).

please just answer.

Most guys are attracted to sweet, happy, preppy girls. And you said you've tried to be happy by thinking happy thoughts, well, thats good, but you've got to live happy thoughts too. You need to make your life more happy. I used to be sad all the time and mad. Now, i've got a bright attitude towards most things. All I did was make my life happier by doing things I like to do. Like practice writing books for my future career as a writer, read, hang out with friends, and take a few risks. One risk was with me falling out of a tree, but it ended up being fun. You just need to do happy and fun things. I really hope I helped! :)

Q: Okay, If you are over the age of 14 then you could really give me some advice. My life sucks! So lets start from the beginning. Shall we? Okay I'm 14/f and I wont be 15 until april 2nd. Well my life is horrible because I dont do anything or go anywhere plus I dont have friends or a boyfriend like everyone else seems to have. I was with this boy that broke my heart. We didnt go out or anything. But I almost lost my virginity wiht him because he played me and I'm young and stupid. He told me that we were meant to be then he ignores me and doesnt want to talk to me so I hate that I did anything will him and I can't get that off my mind and I'm ssooooooooooo depressed about everything! I just cant handle that he played me like a fiddle then left me there. I'm trying to deal with it. I see that everyone else is happy with somebody else! I really want to die. I'm sooo glad i didnt have sex with him because gosh that would be bad. I mean we didnt take our clothes off. So I guess i learned my lesson to make sure I really LOVE someone before I get in their bed and let them stick their hands down my pants. And whats even worse is that my mom is being a bitch about lettin me go anywhere because she knows what I did with that dude. So I lost my moms trust and guys still wont date me. That dude even called me a whore for doing all that I did wiht him sooo fast. So he lost respect for me and I honestly think I will kill myself. My life was bad and now I've made it worse!
Does anyone have advice as to what I can do?

First, don't kill yourself. That's not a good thing. My life is shit too, but you need to forget that stupid guy. He's just trying to be cooler by being stupid. if anybody teases you or anybody tried to hurt you, just do what I do, shrug off their insults with a laugh or a "You're so dumb you think it's funny" comment. Try to get on your mom's good side. Act like an angel around her. Do extra chores or something. And you should wait a while until you choose to lose your virginity. Like, maybe when you move out of your house. if you don't have friends make some. That happened to me when I moved to the town I'm living in. Nobody liked me because I was different. All I did was be nice to people and eventually people thought hey, she's not bad. And now I have a lot of friends. You may be a year older than me, but hey, we could be friends if you want to. You can email me at piratechick@hotmail.com! :)I hope I helped!

Q: Help, please

Someone just called our house phone, and whene i picked up, no one was there. I said 'Hello' a bunch of times, and still no one was there. Then they started breathing into the phone, and then whistling into it. And they're still doing it right now, they won't hang up, and i'm too curious to hang up. BUt i'm also scared.

What should I do?

It's probably some jerk who won't take no as an answer. Just say you'll call somebody(parents/operator etc...) if they don't leave you alone. Keep your voice firm and serious. If it turns out to be a friend you should just keep calm and tell them it wasn't funny at all.

Q: okay thur is this boy tht i really lik he is my neightboor and i wanted to know some good ways to ask sum1 out tht arent tht.....lik scary and make you really nervous to ask i wanna ask em out but i dont wanna jus flat out go up to em and say "will you go out wit me?" he's told me he luved me b4 and comes up and hugs me but i still dont wanna b...flat out thanx alot and any advice appreciated

You should just go talk to him. Start out with a simple conversation, like a normal everyday conversation. Then, just squeeze it in somehow.

Q: ok, i'm gonna tell you straight out, i have alot of money. I'm 15/f and my mother's family is very wealthy. I'm really not a snob or anything, i don't have fancy designer clothes, i'm down to earth and i do community service and donate time and money, and such. The problem is, there is this guy that works for my family. He is 27, and a few years ago he was hired to clean our house once a week. Well me and my sister go to school that is 30 minutes from our house, so a lot of days he also drives us, which is really annoying. For the past year, he works like full time for my parents, he cleans our house like EVERY DAY! he walks our dogs, runs errands, helps with landscaping. It's ridiculous! I hate it, plus he is a total show off and is always doing flips and handsprings in the yard! wtf. and everytime i walk downstairs he starts talking to me and commenting like "oh, your going for a run? i like to run" or "those peach yogurts are good aren't they?what other flavors do you like?"
It wasn't that bad during the school year, but now that school is out i just wanna go outside in my bathing suit and read and practice soccer in my sports bra and stuff, which wouldn't be a big deal, except that he is ALWAYS AROUND!
please help, it is totally ruining my summer!

Try to avoid this man. He´s just doing his job, but if he´s always around ask him to give you some space. If nothing works tell your parents that this guy is getting annoying because he´s hanging around you and won´t go away.

Q: so ive made out before, but always with somewhat unexperienced guys. now this guy whose scored 53498936 girls wants to hook up with me
whats a way to practice kissing... like i heard you can like "kiss" ice cream or something
is there any other ways like that you could do
ive also heard about practicing on your pillow

You could try practicing with a stuffed animal or the mirror. i hear people try that.

Q: How do I stop getting really bad razor burn right below my knees? I already change my razor blade every few days, have tried different razors, use shaving cream, and don't shave when I have goosebumps. Is there anything else I can do?

You could try a different way of shaving. Like buying a cream. I use Nair Pretty Cream. No more cuts or razor burns. Its a new product. You can buy it at any store that sells stuff like that.

Q: Ok so i really like this guy and me and him would talk sometimes at school but now it's summer so i added him on myspace and i want to message him but i dont know what to say to him i mena i dont want to tell him i like him i want to become friends with him so what do i say????

Start out nice and simple like, "Hey, what's up? Not much here." Then just start asking some questions for him to answer and tell him bits and pieces of things that are happening with you. If you want you could scaduale a hang out date with him. But as for messaging him, just start out simple, don't talk too much about youself.

Q: I really want to know because everyone else has already lost it and I'm 14 and I havent!

14 is wayyyyyy to young to be losing your virginity. If other people your age lost theirs then i say thats sad. Your virginity is something valuable. I'd say you shouldn't lose yours until your at least 20, but hey, if you want to lose it, go ahead, but i'm telling you, you don't want to lose it.

Q: my family is fighting alot lately. Ever since my aunt died (april 8) :( my dad has been smoking alot more, which isnt good. He trys to quit, but it doesnt work. Also like everyone just gets mad at everyone alot now and idk what to do
Ideas to make my family happyer?
We all miss my aunt alot, she was really close to us. But idk why is my family acting this way, so am i and i dont even know why. I think most of it is me, i dont know, but i always get mad at the simpilest things with my parents.
Help

You should call a family meeting and sit around together and set out a bunch of pics or something that reminds you of your aunt. Remanise the days everyone had with her. Grief shouldn't overcome your life. Losing a loved one is hard, but if you remember her you'll feel better. If your family continues to fight, get out of the house for a while. Stay at a friends or something. Talk to somebody about your grief. Talking helps better than action.

Q: how do i delete my myspace?

Go to account settings, then click cancel account, then an email will appear at your inbox for your email, not myspace inbox. It will verify your account deletion.

Q: I run about 2 miles everyday and after I run I'm pretty hungry but I don't want to put all the calories I lost right back in. What should I eat after running?

You should eat a fruit or veggie or maybe a granola bar. If you can't find any of these you should go shopping for heathier foods.

Q: Umm... I think I'm obbessed with my b.f. Zac! I go over his house almost everyday but not right now because I have mono. I check his messages on myspace to see if he's been talking to another girl. Plus I call him whenever I get the chance and I can't stand to be away from him for even a day! Is this healthy ????

No, it's not exactly healthy. You should just calm down. Do something to keep your mind off him. If nothing works go over to his house and just get close to him. If you keep obbsessing over him, your social life will brake down. I mean he's probably a really great guy, but he's not your life. Try calming down and calling a friend. Spill to your friend about him.

Q: i recently had a sleep over and i asked my friend b4 bed if she was gunna take her bra off and she said no, she wears it to bed, and its bad not too. then my other friend said you shouldnt wear one to bed cuz its bad for you or something. should you? will it change anything if you dont?
thanks xx

The same happened to me a couple days ago. I don't wear mine to bed because it's VERY uncomferable. I suggest you don't if you like to get good sleep.

Q: my mother thinks that tutors are very handy and indeed, they are, but I think that she is overdoing it with the tutors. i have three and for different subjects too. but, i find that they are not helping me. I don't even listen to them anymore. I've learned how to tune them out because they just keep talking and talking and I don't even understand what their saying. Sometimes, when I study in groups or when I go to the teacher to ask for his/her help, I feel a lot better about it and I understand it more. I've always been a pretty good student, but there has been one subject that I have not been able to master, and that's chemistry. Because I failed the final, that was the only reason I failed the coarse, because I was like borderline, but the school has chosen not to put me in summerschool because they don't think it's fair that for one subject, that I even started doing better in second semester, they should put me in summerschool, so I just have to study this packet and re-take the test. Well, my mother has schedualed appointments with this online tutor from India, and all she says is, I'm sorry, and she's so sarcastic!! Then, there's this other guy, who isn't an online tutor, but I meet with him at the book store and I always feel like he's hitting on me. I think he's trying to play footsies with me or something. He's so creepy and he says really creepy things. Like, one time he started asking me about bionic chemicals or something and I didn't know what they were and then i'm like there is no bionic ions is there? and he's like no and then he started talking to me about bionic people and my mom is like laughing at all of this and it isn't funny. It's soooo incfredibly disgusting!! I dont want to. I don't want to go have class with him to help me review. I'm so scared of him. what should i do?

Tell your mom that this tutor isn't helping and your scared of him. If she doesn't believe you say "mom, im serious. This guy is freaking me out. Can't I just get a better tutor?" And if you have more than 1 tutor that's kinda bad, so I suggest you get 1 tutor to teach you all the subjects that need help. And if this guy your creeped out about is still your tutor and he keeps scaring you, tell him. He should understand if you look him in the eyes. If he trys something tell someone immediently.

Q: So i am going to highshool and my boyfriend will still be in jr. high.. and i think it wont work out will it?? there is this guy in my grade that really likes me and is a jock and everything and i am normal?? should i drop my boyfriend that i have right now?? or just see what happens?

If you really like your boyfriend who will still be in jr. high then you'll choose him. I'm guessing you should keep your boyfriend if he's the one you want.

Q: 14/f

is it okay for a 17 year old guy (just turned 17) and a 14 (turning 15 soon) year old girl to go out?

i dont want to get him in trouble

17 is little too old for a 14(turning 15) year old girl to be dating, but if he's worth it, do it. If a 14(Turning 15) year old girl loves him, she will stay with him.

Q: my friend is really pretty and likes to flirt with guys. once she was over my house and the guy that i liked was on so she gave him a link to her myspace and asked him what do you think of me. he wouldn't answer since he had a girlfriend. and she goes i can't wait till he breaks up with his girlfriend so he can tell me what he thought. then she put together this lunch so i could meet up with him but she started flirting with him and he asked her to be his girlfriend. she knew i liked him so she asked me what should say. i told her to say yes regardless my feelings and the next day after she said yes she bragged about getting him is she really a true friend?

A true friend would think of you first. She needs to think about your feelings. She doesn't sound too true if she bragged. Friends who brag can hurt you later on in life.

bio

My name is Isabel. I live with my mom, dad, sister and two dogs. I have a brother, but he never really talks to me, which makes me kinda sad, because I was closest to him in my family. I'm a sensitive type person. I love to make friends. I don't really enjoy skool much, but i do like to learn amazing new fun things. When I'm older i want to be a writer and an acrhaeologist because i love writing and history fasinates me. I'm not exactly the smartest kid in the world, but I can be. I just like to have fun and be free. My features are dark brown hair and dark brown eyes. I'm Mexican, so i have that tanish skin, not too tan, though. My dad is Mexican, mom's American. I love to make friends, so any body need a friend come pick me!