piratechicka's advice column

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Q: kk. im going out with a girl who is nice but im beginiing to lose interest in her. and theres another girl who i loved before and every since i went out with the girl my feelings for the other one have just become stronger

so do i let the relationship dye down so she dumps me, or do i tell her the truth

TELL THE TRUTH!!!!! Girls like honesty. If you lie, you're going to have a red hand print on your face for 12 years. Not to freak you out... Anyway, if you really want to brake up, tell her the truth of why you want to brake up. I hope this helped and didn't freak you out! :D

Q: and constantly compares you to another sibling, calls u stupid, fat, ugly (about every time she sees me)....like, everytime theres a TV ad for a skincare line or something she says, 'you should get that!' (cause i don't have such great skin) every 5 seconds ...she loves it.
always talking to me and staring at my acne and/or saying, "what is happening to your face?!". and shes always like, you look so ugly right now!
or she even tells me to shut up randomly, sometimes even wanting to get violent....or 'why don't you get your eyebrows done? (ur (my) sister) is so much prettier, why can't you look like her', etc.....'ur so dark (wtf?) and ugly'

she is bipolar, for real. i can't take it anymore.

she is so comforting to hug sometimes and talk to when I'm low or when my dad gives me stress (he is a resume/checklist, 'did u finish this, did you finish that'' type of dad!) not a great combo. But it's so weird because she gets into a nasty behavior randomly.

for example...i have concentration problems (add) and my dad helps me focus sometimes to do my schoolwork (i take medication, i'm 17)....and my mom imitates me and is like, "I'm so stupid, I'm going to just use my dad, he can do all my work for me, and mom cooks so I can use her too."

it's hard and really annoying because she digs into some of my deepest insecurities and just full on insults me. my sister doesn't talk to her anymore. but its harder for me because i still live in this house.

its lonely as ever, especially because as of now I don't have many friends since I moved and am going to a new school this fall. =/!

Your mom just wants to get a rise out of you. Ignore her. When she says your ugly, say "I no. I'm proud of it," or "Where do you think I get it from?" OR "So? If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all."
Also, if she says, "Why can't you be like your sister?" Say, "I can't. I don't want to. I want to be me. I'm me. Just me and nothing more, MOM." Put emphises into the word mom. I have a friend who does that to me. I ignore her. See, whenever someone insults you, you have to take the insult as a compliment, no matter how much it hurts. If you show anger or sadness, they'll take this as a "Go ahead! Make fun of me! I'm stupid!" sign. Anyways, just try some of the things I told you and see if it works. And, maybe just try to fix up your looks. It really doesn't matter whats on the outside, it's whats on the inside that counts... I sounded kinda like a counsuler...
I hope this helped! :D If you want to talk sometime email me at piratechicka@otmail.com.

Q: There is a lot of drama at my school. I hate it and a lot of people are mean to me. I loss like 6 friends last year and they are all mean to me now and I don't even know why. They said I started drama. But everyone doesd you know. How do I stop being so dramatic and being a good friend?

Try being nicer to people. Not so nice that you freak them out, but like nice as in fun nice. Try to have a sunny disposition. I have one, and it seems to make my life easier. Give it a try. Hope this helped! :D

Q: I got into a major fight with one of my friends and then all her friends turned againest me, and they were my friends to. I really like them and have said sorry. One of her friends have always hated me to. How can i make them like me, if i don't make up then I know there will be drama next year. How can i stop all this drama and resolve things?

You can't make anybody like you, but you could try being nicer and saying nice things. Try to have a sunny disposition. To stop drama, just go with the flow. Like I said, try to have a sunny disposition. I have a sunny disposition, and it seems to make my life easier and less... Dramatic. I hope this helped! :D

Q: Okay one night I was hanging with my best friends
Val and Kristen, We were making fun of the boys that we've dated and you know having fun and yeahh drinking a little..:) Then Rae came over and started hanging and was like omgosh you guys dont know do you! And then told us about Eric&Alisha... two people that have been going out sence the beginging of the 7th grade and now there going into ninth. So that's a longg while. They broke up because Eric was being mean to Gene little brother.. dumb I know and how heart-broken Eric is.. And ive liked him for soo long I wanted to call him. Rachel gave me the number and when he finally picked up the phone he was like if I needed your pitty I would ask for and how if he wanted me to have his number he would've given it too me. Which I can understand i have random people calling me all the time. So I just basicly hung up on him.. and we've been friends for a long time and i knew that the only reason he said that was becuase his mother has a porblem with my WHOLE family (longg story) and thats why he never gave me his number. So all that happened like 5 maybe 6 days ago, and yesturday his mom called me crying saying that she needs me help to get him up and outa bed cuz he only gets out've his room for food and bathroom so because I love him I went over and his mom was cool with me, I talked to Eric like a normal person saying he can't be sorry for himself because he deserves SO much better,, and he got all upset saying no ones gunna like him the same and I said that I love him and he was like but thats you. your Katie... and I got so pissed because he said more i dont think I can say on this website and i was like you know what here take it. And i gave him the little peice of paper rae gave me with him number on it and i said I hope I forget your number and make sure to forget mine, you just lost someone that thought the World of you and when you relise you made a mistake, its too late. Alishas a B****! and you do deserve better, but until you relise how great you are dont even think of me. And left. And ofcoarse through all of that I was crying and right now im over Kristens and he's ben calling my cell, so I shut it off and I dont know how he got Kristens home number and cell but he wont stop calling her either.
I'm not ready to talk to him..
What Do I Do?
ASAP Please........

Clearly, this guy made a mistake. You should talk 2 him. Just pick up the phone and say hello? I think you have the wrong number. (I no a little cruel, but...) If he says he's sorry forgive him after a while. If he gets mad at you, tell him you don't feel like talking to a stranger. I think it's a little silly for him to go into a complete melt down over... just one person, but that's my thing so anyway, I hope I helped at least a little! :D

Okay, this is the answer 2 your other question, Welll, if he's coming over and he says he's sorry, accept his apology. If he gets mad, tell him to leave. (Yea, harsh, but still) But I think you should talk to him about the problem. If you don't have anything to say, tell him you don't. I hope this helped! :D

Q: 14/m whenever im somewhere and girls i do not know see me that are my age, they seem to be embarrassed and wont look me in the eye. I see them looking at me when im not looking at them and they wont face me. i went over to my friends house and she had two of her friends i had never met before. They were eating when i walked in and the two new girls looked really embarrassed and wouldnt look at me. then when they get to know me there not embarrassed anymore. does this happen to all people when they have never met before??? im not doing anything or looking at them strangely.

O yea, That's normal. The girls were just thinking you were cute. Trust me, I get nervous and kinda emmbarresed around guys cuz I think I look stupid and try to fix myself up a bit. And when I get to know that guy, I start to feel better cuz I'm not making an idiot of myself. ANYWAY(:$), yea, it's normal. Girls were just checking you out.

Q: I've liked this girl for as long as I can remember.We went out once but it just kind of ended.Since then she's gone out with a bunch of guys,and I get sort of jealous every time I see her with someone else.She's the one person that fully understands me and everything and it feels like we should be together,but I have doubts.

Should I ask her or is it too late?I'm afraid that after the years of building our friendship,it could get in the way.I just don't know what to do and I know I won't be satisfied until I at least let her know how I feel.

I think it would be a good idea to ask her. If you want to let her know how you feel, tell her. I'm a girl and I think it would be a good idea. Maybe you guys could start again. Like talk and get it in that you like her, then just ask her out. It probably sounds harder than you think, but it can be easy if you make it that way. Hope this helped! :D

Q: I just got mad at my aunts boyfriend son because he sent a message to one of my friendS telling them i think their hott and all this shit.Anyway i caught him and told him what he was doing and he said nothing so I grabbed him by the collar and he said he woulD aonly tell me if he told my cousin that way he can tell me.Hes such a coward.After a few minutes my cousin came out told me that he said that he sent a message to my crush,my frist CRUSH!Then a i got a message back and it was from my friend.I was almost on the verge of tears,thats what I get for not logging out of my myspace.I knew he was a jerk but i never knew he would go so low.Its almost like he wants ruin my life because this ai'ent the frist time did somthing heartless to me.i'm trying so hard not let my anger rise because I know if I let out all my anger i might send someone to the hospital.any ideas on how to calm myself down?

Try ignoring him. If he says something just look around bewildered, like, "Whats that noise?" Then to calm your anger, just read, listen to music, watch TV, get on the phone/computer and talk to a friend. That's happened to me a couple of days ago, only my BEST friend told my enemy that I've liked him since 3rd grade. Sure, I like, him ,but I don't wanna date him or anything, but anyway, just take a couple deep breaths and try some of the things I told you about before. Hope I helped! :D

Q: What are good [romantic/comedy] books to read over the summer?

I'd suggest Fear Street Books by R.L Stine. I've read almost all of the Fear Street Books and they rock! They have horror, romance, comedy(Depending on which one you happen to grab). I just got done reading one called Beach House. They're just about teenagers in high school who happen to encounter terrible problems. Most of them have love parts in them.

Q: has anyone seen ghostrider? are there legends like that are true?

Yes, I've seen GhostRider and no one knows for sure if legends are true. I like to believe in legends cuz they make life more exciting and fun. Some people don't like to believe in legends. You can believe in legends if you want. Nobody can tell you otherwise. :D

Q: I was just wondering what age some of you got your period at. Cuz im 14 and i still havent got mine.

Unfortunatly, I got mine when I was 11 at the end of 6th grade! Lucky duck, you haven't started! :D

Q: Do you think it is safe if me and my friend both go to NYC together? We're 15 and we live in NJ but it's kinda close & we can get there by bus.

We've gone to NYC like a lot of times but never by ourselves.. & We know how to get around, but it's like.. do you think we will get kidnapped or something? I haven't really heard of that happening & with so many people why would they take us..? But idk, what's your opinion?

In my opinion, I'd say go for it! As long as your folks are ok with it, I'd do it. If someone happens to follow you and your friend, just hide in a crowd. There's a .5% out of 100% that someone will be interested in kidnapping or aomehting. All in all, I think it's totally safe for you and your friend to have fun in NYC! Hope this helped!

Q: a friend and me kissed and now she's avoiding me and spreading rumors that im a lesbian. What the hell?

First, your 'friend' doesn't sound like a very good friend. You should ignore these rumors. They're just words. And if you want, you could prove your not a lesbian, i no you aren't, by going out with some guy. Or ask a guy to help you out with this prob. I hope this helped!

Q: my brothers are ruining my computer!

my brothers, play these games, that i know have viruses because my protection stuff, tells me. and i try to tell my mom, and shes like whatever dont worry about it. i dont care if it breaks, then they cant go on it. but HELLO. what about me? i mean i hardly go on, but on rare occassion, i like to. and that tottaly isnt fair that there breaking it, and ruining it for everyone.

what should i do?

Tell your brothers. Show them your protection thing and when they see it, tell them there will be no more computer if they keep playing these games. Hope this helped!

Izzy :D

Q: im going to my friends house soon and i just got my period.. we wanted to go in her pool so if i wear a tampon nothing will happen right?

Nothing will happen. Nothing ever happened to me. You shouldn't stay in too long though, but just have fun while your there. Don't worry.

Q: ok, my freind (A) used to go to my school like in 6th grade. now im going into 8th grade and she is too. my friend (I) went to her house. (I) said that (A) pulled out a cigoratte and she smoked. now (I) started BEGGING 4 one just to know what it was like. (A) said heck no and just started smokin again. (I) just keept on begging and finnaly (A) gave up and gev her one. (I) begged for another one and (A) gave it to her. thats all i know. now i dont really trust my BEST frind (I) because she lies A LOT! she says shes never had one science that day. should i trust her? she says shes not addicted but im not sure. PLZ HELP ME!!! the mail question: Should i trust (I)?

Your friend was pretty stupid for doing that. I bet she regrets it too. You should tell (I) that smoking isn't right. Get her addicted to something else. Like ice cream, chocolate or something healthy instead of smoking. She probably lies to get out of messy situations. Everybody lies once and a while. She's probably feeling crappy of her lies and smoking. You should support her just incase she tries smoking again. Hope this helped you! And good luck!

Q: i was just talking to my friend and she is mad at me and when i talk to her she just yells at me and i really want to be her friend her name is izzy and i want to talk to her but she thiks i am a jerk and arnt very nice i need help please HELP!!!!!!!!!

Hey, however this is. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to act like a buttface. And maybe you should lay off the asking questions. I know you forgive me because we talked about it on the phone, sooo... Hey, did you see this one ad for google? It's hilarious! It shows up on myspace! Write me back on myspace!

Q: what should i talk about with this guy i like? i cant think of anything. help please.

Try something simple, like "How're you?" Then let your mind do the rest. Just simple conversation. If you can't find anything just say something that happened the other day like, "The other day I fell of my bunk bed," OR "You'll never believe what happened at this fast food place!" Just pic kout interesting things. Talk about things this guy likes. Maybe sports or video games or computers. Wing it. I hope I helped!

Izzy :D

Q: 13/f
Okay so I have been shaving my legs for a couple years, but I've just noticed that the hair grows back like extremely fast. It's never even completely gone like my friends legs will be so smooth and mine will have stubble the same day I shaved. Today I used a brand new razor and I still had stubble after, it never comes out smooth. Any tips? Or are there any other things that work like those spray on things that remove hair? My friend told me that it didn't work on her.. she used the one that you see on the commerical and the girl says Mine is Kiwi! and shes on the phone with her friend. Any help?

Well, I use Nair Pretty Hair. It works okay. No cuts or anything. It takes the hair off. Sometimes it doesn't work for other people, but most times it does. I hope this helped.

Izzy :D

Q: Soo, hello.
Well first off I'm 14 and a girl so this may seem like another, '(pre)teen thinks she's in huge dilemma even though it's a simple answer'. Well, I know the answer but I need some more...advice.

Okay so I have this 'major' lust for a guy friend of mine. He's just everything I want in a boyfriend but also some things I don't want. I am planning to make a 'move' on him but there's just a large problem in my way,
The Communication going on between us. Our communication isn’t…. A lot. He’ll talk to me one day and then sort of ignore me the other day. Most times, we only say hi to each other. It wasn’t always like this, we use talk like good friends and joke around too. That’s the person I really fell over for. I need help with this. Before I ask you them, I have talk to him about it but he doesn’t see anything weird about it. I have told him I liked him TWICE and he doesn’t really say anything but an ‘ok’ and ‘that’s cool’. Even if we don’t talk to each other, I always catch him looking at me and I try to wave back but he turns around quickly when he sees that I’ve caught his look. Haha, okay moving on.
Should I really make a move on him and would it be worth it?
Do any of you have suggestions as to why he acts the way he does with his ignoring and looking?
Much appreciated if you’d answer. Thanks a lot!

I think, if you really like this guy, you should make a move. Now, for his weird behavour, he's probably nervous and doesn't know what to do. You should talk to him more. If he ignores, tell him to please cut it out. You feel rejected or something. But you should make a move if you REALLY like him. Hope I helped!

Izzy :D

bio

My name is Isabel. I live with my mom, dad, sister and two dogs. I have a brother, but he never really talks to me, which makes me kinda sad, because I was closest to him in my family. I'm a sensitive type person. I love to make friends. I don't really enjoy skool much, but i do like to learn amazing new fun things. When I'm older i want to be a writer and an acrhaeologist because i love writing and history fasinates me. I'm not exactly the smartest kid in the world, but I can be. I just like to have fun and be free. My features are dark brown hair and dark brown eyes. I'm Mexican, so i have that tanish skin, not too tan, though. My dad is Mexican, mom's American. I love to make friends, so any body need a friend come pick me!