about

"We make war so that we may live in peace." -aristotle

"If you judge someone right away, you will not be able to learn to love them."

I'm Hayley, I'll try to help you as best I can. I'm 18, and a senior in high school. I like art, music, and clothing. I'm a vegetarian abd have been consistent with it for four years. I have two dogs a westie named misty and a Maltese/poodle mix named mally. I know a lot about dogs because any time
my dogs get a scratch, I research and call the vet haha.

advice

Ok well its summer and all and i want to try to do a airbrush tan and the one where someone does it for you. it takes me a while to get tan and when i do it goes away after like a week....okay so i was wondering does it really work? or does it turn you orange?

it turns you orange. i've never see anyone, not look orange from those. have you ever seen that sunset tan? or something like that, on E.. yeah, well it cost like 1000 dollars, for them to do it there, and the girl came out looking so orange. and i mean, it will probably cost alot cheaper, if you dont live in california, but if they charge that much, and the person still comes out orange, its probably not going to look good. but, what i strongly suggest, is sephora, i can't remember if its a spray on tan, or a lotion. and you do it yourself, BUT, if you don't like it, they have a remover. thats why i really like it. because since everyone has different tastes, and different opinions, if it doesnt come out exactly how you were hoping it too, atleast you can remove it and not be stuck with it. sephora, was on the news [thats how i first saw it] because they were saying how great of a product it is, and ive also seen it reccommend in many magazines. like seventeen, and such. also, what i use, and i personally think turns out great, and not orange at all, is jergens. i love ittt. im very particular about my tan, and it always looks very natural. and not like someone just put me in a fire, and i came out all burned looking. i'm not sure if that has a remover, but its still awesome. you can find sephora in sephora stores, or probably drugstores too. jergens, is at drugstores also.

k i hope that helped =) cya

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ok so im a 16/f and i need a new look for 11th grade. like i want a makeover basically. ok well see im really skinny and i need help in gaining some weight and not only that i have really bushy eyebrows. and also where should i shop and what kind of clothes should i get?

just eat more then you usually do. like, i mean, eat healthy, but like if you were gonna eat one celery stick, eat two. that type of thing. go and get your eyebrows waxed. make sure you go somewhere good, because you don't wanna go to some cheap place, and have them mess it up. even though you didn't mention this, if you wanna make a dramatic entrance, if you have really long hair, get it cut. not really short or anything, but go to a really good salon, and ask them to give you a really 'in' hair cut. if you dont wear make up, start. if you go to like, the mall, and go to one of those make up counters [like clinque or lancome] that where i get my make up.. ask them to do your make up for you, and to tell you what they think you should wear. get jergens. its tanning lotion. its really good, and it doesnt make you look orange. and its better then tanning outside, because its quicker, healthier, and it doesnt make you look burned. also, if your teeth are kinda yellow or something, or you just want them really nice, then get crest white strips. they work well. if you have any acne, make sure you also get some foundation. i like clinques stuff pretty well.. i just usually wear that in the winter though, just so my face tone is even. but, i dont wear it in the summer, because i use that tanning lotion all over.

now.. as for your clothes, i really dont like telling someone what type of clothing to wear. because you should wear whatever you like and whatever makes you feel comfortable. but, stores that i personally think have some extremely cute clothing is..

-forever 21
-buckle
-delias [that store is kinda a hit or miss though, sometimes you walk in and love everything, other times you walk out empty handed.]
-pac sun has a few things.
-hollister [but dont get shirts just say hollister.]
-abercrombie & fitch [dont get stuff that just says abercrombie. because thats not fashion. itd advertisment.]
-American Eagle
-Aeropostale
-Victoria secrets [for there pink pants & such.]
-Hot topic [ i like it for there band tshirts..]
-Macys [i like there DKNY stuff]

& just places like that. mix and match stuff. dont just wear it all from one store.

i hope that helped. (:

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can i hear your story? do you regret it? thoughts/feeling now? still in a relationship with that guy? or was it a one night stand? I'm just curiouss pleasee && thank you for readingg and respondingg =]

i was in 7th grade, and it was in the summer. and there was this kid who was 15 and he wanted to. and i was mad at my ex, and then so i did. and it was a huge mistake. nobody knows. not any of my friends, or anyone. big mistakee. dont make the mistake i did. if you dont love the person, it isnt anything special. i broke it off with him. he got mad, and almost told everyone. he then, told people at my school. i denied it. but i switched schools. just so i could start over.

theres alot more detail to it, that was just the outline, but i dont really like thinking about it much.

if your under 15, i highly suggest you dont do it.

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im 14/f. my best friend lives next door and we've known each other since we were 2. both of our families are pretty strict, but her parents are super conservative. like, shes not allowed to date until she's 17, she can't wear 2-piece bathing suits, and she can only wear plain white underwear, nothing "pretty" and definitely no bikinis. well, lately she's started nagging at me for everything i do and its really getting annoying. like i have these sweat pants from victorias secret... theyre just plain grey with a dog on them, it doesnt even say victorias secret, but my friend is like "omg i cant believe youre wearing something from that store!!" and i cant go to the pool when shes there because she'll give me looks and say "you shouldnt be wearing a 2-piece!" and if i have a problem with my boyfriend, i cant talk to her about it cuz she'll just say "you shouldnt even HAVE a boyfriend!" im so tired of her judging me. im definitely NOT a slut AT ALL... i dont dress like one or act like one... but when im around her she makes me feel like one. i havent told her how i feel cuz i doubt it would change anything... she thinks shes right and she also thinks shes trying to "help" me. so would it even do any good to say anything, or should i just ignore it and try not to let it bug me? (i could try, but it really gets on my nerves!!!)

I bet shes jealous of you. I mean, if my parents sucked that bad, and wouldn't let me have a boyfriend, or wear a two piece bathing suit or anything, i'd be pretty jealous of my friends. So, i'd talk to her about it, and just tell her how you feel, it won't hurt to try, and if she still does it, stop talking to her alot, like kinda giving her the cold shoulder, and then she'll most likely, ask you why your giving her the cold shoulder, and you can be like.. i can never tell you anything or talk to you about anything, because your always judging me. or something like that.

i hope it works outt. (:

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so ive had three relationships in high school and im going to be a junior-one lasted 2 weeks and the other lasted 2 months and this one is going on 6 months..but now me and my boyfriend fight alot and he is very insecure-does anybody have any ways to help me to get him to trust me/know that im not going to leave him..i tell him all the time but it doesnt work..also how can i not be so jealous with him around other girls? and finally-he told me that he's the reason our relationship works and it didnt end fast like my other ones..do you think its that mean that he said that or am i overexaggeratingg?..thank you

I don't know, I mean it would kind of make sense, what hes saying. I mean, you didn't stay long with those other 2 at all, and hes obviously doing something better, then the other two. So, no i dont think thats mean. he was just making a point. don't worry about it. and who cares if you didnt last too long with those other 2, its highschool, your not suppose to date just one person.

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Ok well my friends are gonna get drunk after our grad.

should i go or not?

it's no pressure, they really are my friends. they do drugs sometimes but i'm the baby of the group so thye don't force me or anything and they dont' do it when I'm around.

I never did drugs or drank before.

But i just want one night jsut to feel drunk, you know?

I don't know..it's 50-50 to me

Nooo. Don't. You shouldn't have to have a good time, to be drunk. You can die, espically if your tiny. This one girl I knew, she got drunk at a party, she only drank 2 or 3 beers, and she wondered outside, and get hit by a car. yeah, she died. wait, i know more, another girl, who i somewhat knew, it was actually my friends siters, best friend, yeah, she was a perfect student A+ {this happened last year when she graduated..) had really good scholarships to colleges, she went to a party, after graudation, and she got drunk, and she fell asleep on train tracks, and a train came, and she died. oh but wait, theres more, a few years back.. there was these boys, who got drunk, they ran into a tree, the driver who was drunk, didnt die, but all of his friends who were not drunk, died. hold on i got a few more.. there was this other boy, and he was drunk at a party, actually, he was my neighbor, he got drunk, and killed a family. the family who had 2 young girls, around 3 and 6, were coming home, because they just got the puppy.

Are you willing to put yourself in danger and others? Just to 'feel drunk'

Don't be an idiot.
I don't wanna read about you in the newspaper.

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i think my girlfriends dad sexually abuses her. her parents are divorced and she has five older brothers but they all live on their own since there alot older than she is. i went over there for dinner one time because she said she was scared but she wouldnt tell me why and the whole meal her dad kept making perverted comments about her chest size. shes like a 36d which is nice. her dad was like wow molly your tits look huge i just wanna grab them. and she kept telling him to stop and saying not now dad please. and he kept asking me when i was gonna fuck her next. and he thinks she would be good in bed. she kept getting really embrassed. then all of a sudden he did grabb her and then she started crying and her dad told me to leave but she looked so scared i couldnt leave her. i took her to my house. and i kept asking her did he always do this to you and she wouldnt answer me. i dont know what to do. do you think he rapes her and sexually abuse her. thank you in advance.

I think he does both. Shes obviously very embarrassed, and the reason she wanted you to go with her, is so, he wouldn't rape her while she was there. She doesn't wanna tell you because shes embarrassed, and is afraid that she'll get introuble or something. Whats her mom like? Have you ever met her? I think you should tell your paretns, or actually, vist this website.. dmlive.com i was listening to a the radio, and you can either call in, or like talk to them live on the site, and there like these adults, i think there kinda like the people here, only all adults, and kinda like professionals.

this is something you like need to do. help her, she needs it.

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SO, last year i dated this guy I really liked named kyle. at first eevrything was great. i became friends with his friends and i thought we were totally in love. he said he loved me soo much and that I was his angel. we met at a camp, and the next week at the camp was amazing. we accualy snuck out and watched the sunset together. so everything was perfect. but then one day he told me just for today he wanted to hang out with the guys. so that day i went with the girls. we were going to go horsebackridding but it got caneled so we decided to go down to the lake, but as we were going up the big hill I saw kyle on the bench making out with another girl. I got closer and started to cry right away me screaming "how could you" i started screaminng at him. while he said lanie, it is NOT what it looks like, I just ran away, but he chased after me, i ran to the girls cabin the boys werent allowed. my friends came with. he stode outside for a while, then left, as I was crying for hours with my friends. at times he would try to talk to me after that, but I just walked away. so a year later, he called me out of the blue, and asked me whats up. When i asked why he was callin me he just said "I dont know. i missed you." he also said he didnt have another girlfriend after me, and I was the only one he wants. and that hes TRULY sorry. I called his friends and they said that was true but i asked my girlfriends, and they said he was with a girl just the other night. idk. i found out he drinks alot now too. but honestly after the brake-up, i hurt soo much but never got over him. i dont know if I should give him another chance. should I? i just dont know anymore.

Once a player, always a player.
Move on, if he drinks alot, then it will be hard for you to trust him. Tell him that you just can't trust him after that, and he really hurt you. if he sounds really really really really sincere,then try it out again, if you want.

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16/f

What triggers a person to say `Oh, she`s SO fake.`
Is it how a person looks; is it how they act or what they say? I don`t understand how someone can be fake. Does dying your hair make you fake? Do certain hair colours make you more or less fake? I think this whole `fake` fad is ridiculous and embarassing.

I dye my hair blonde on top and black underneath. Does that mean people have the right to say `you're sooo fake, ew` to me or behind my back? I`m sorry but I just don`t see what they`re implying. Besides, appearance has very little to do with personality.

Thanks.

Depends. Some people consider the word fake to mean, someone with fake hair color, and fake tan, to be fake.

But, what I think a true fake person is, is someone who will be all omg i love you! and then the second that person walks away, they go, ew shes so weird.

that to me, is being tottaly fake. or two faced. whichever.

It depends though, I mean, I agree with you, basically, its like.. don't judge a book by its cover. but you will always find people who do..

so just dont worry about it, all that matters is what you think.,

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I'm 16/F.
I don't like who I am
I don't like how outspoken I am about everything
I want to be the quiet kid no one knows about
I fight with my parents a lot because I disagree on many of their thoughts and actions
It gets me in trouble and I hate it because my uncle is always yelling at me
I don't fit in anywhere really
I don't have a special talent, or anything I can do.


I want to change.


I want to be quiet, and shy. I don't want to talk to anyone a lot, I don't want to give people my opinions. I don't want to trust anyone anymore, it's screwed me over big time. I don't want to laugh at pointless things and I don't want to be the loud obnoxious girl I am. I want to lose weight, I want to look pretty (I don't wear a lot of make up, just eyeliner.) I'm going to get some crazy hair cut or something that symbolizes who I am. I admit it, I listen to emo music and some death metal/hardcore whatever you want to call it. I don't want to be with my family, or have anything to do with my family. I just want to be the quiet kid that does everything for them and doesn't get noticed for it.


If anyone has any ideas on how I can change, mentally/physically or emotionaly I would appriciate it a great deal. Making like losing weight tips or new hair styles (emoish I guess)

Don't listen to the person below me. Even though, I see what there saying. Now, why do you want to be all one thing so badly? Why do you want to label yourself, as an 'emo' Why not just be you? When giving your opinions on things, just do it nicely. Just say like, "well I think ..... but thats just my opinon" Be whoever YOU want to be. If you truly wanna be so quiet and just kept to yourself, then that is tottaly fine. and psh who says your obnoxious? if you dont believe your obnoxious, then your not. your you, and if anyone has a problem with it, then they are just being an idiot. don't listen to anyone but yourself. all that matters, is what you think. dont let a haircut or anything, 'symbolize you' as just one thing. you are not an emo kid. that is not your name. you are who you are. your family loves you, no matter what they say, in there hearts, they love you. don't change who you are. just be you.

As for the losing weight thing, there is nothing wrong with losing a few pounds, to be more healthy. [but if you are already skinny, please dont starve yourself.. check your BMI to find out.] you just type in BMI calculater, and it will come up (: If you wanna lose weight, just cut out the junk food, drink water, take walks daily.

be the best you can be.

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okay well one of my best friends has a gf that he likes a ton.they have been tgr since september,they are perfect together.but he knows i like him,and he asked me to hook up and do stuff with him.i really really really want to,ive liked him for so long!does this make me a slut?

Well, in my opinion, yes. I mean, okay pretend, that your his girlfriend. And then your boyfriend went and ask a girl to do a buncha stuff with him, what would you think of that girl, honestly?

I mean, i've been here. But, sometimes dignity is just more important. You know what I'm saying? I hope you kinda see things clearly, and from other peoples view. Make the best decision for you. If you think its the right move, and your not afraid of what others may think, or say, then hey. go for it. But, to me.. it sounds like you know, that isn't right.

Theres always other fish in the sea. (:

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i dont wanna tan in the sun because that can cause skin canser and tanning beds R NOT GOOD so how can i get a natural looking tan without the bottle stuff that makes your skin look orange.THANKSSSS

what i basically recommend, is jergens. they rock, i use it. and it looks so natural. if you dont wanna risk it, or something.. then try sephora. if you dont like it, then they have a remover to remove it. (:

ha and ya i know, i dont like tanning outside or in tanninbg beds, if you read seventeen magazine, there new one, itll make you like never wanna go outside. but, yeah jergens is super good. and i havent used sephora. but its recommended alot, in magazines i read, and i saw it on the news, about how there remover and such. so it must be pretty awesome stuff. (:

i hope you look at this again.. but uhm, yeah. sephora has a store. im not sure where, but im sure, if you like search it online , or something, then it will find you the closet store. and jergens can be found in like and drugstore.

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How is the best way to get a tan? Sun or tanning salon. I need one bad after this winter I am so pale. Any ideas?

actually, a tanning bed, and the sun, is equally harmful. you don't won't UVA rays or UVB rays. UVA rays go deep into your skin, causing wrinkles, saggy skin, and brown spots. UVB rays hit the top of layer of your skin, burning it and causes painful sunburns and peeling. which is deff. nasty.

There is nothing healthy or pretty about damaged skin. it makes you get zits, because it increases oil production. plus the UVA rays. and uvb ray stuff

tanning bed makes all of that 15 times worse. and just because it doesnt happen immediatly, doesnt mean it isnt happening.

try jergens. it works well. and is reccommended.

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My homecoming is october 13 or 14th and i am planning on going. im in tenth if it helps. but i found a dress that has like spaghetti straps and im definitely not tan enough to wear it. if i layout almost everyday til then, and maybe use some tanning oil, will my arms and chest and back be the same??

omg. no don't do that. big mistake.

tanning oil, doesn't help. it makes you have one of those nasty burnt looking tans. and those arn't attractive.

you don't wanna sit outside everyday, your just increasing your chances of skin cancer. just get sepharo [cant spell it, but im close] if you don't like the tan it gives you, you can just remove it, with there remover. (:

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when you go tanning do you lose calories when you sweat? hah its a weird question but just wondering. okay so i use to weigh 113 and now i weigh 128 and i just suddenly gained weight! i'm only 14 so why is this happening!? will it go away! what do i dooo!

When you sweat, yeah your losing weight, because water is leaving your body, but, once you drink that bottle of water, its back. (: you probably gained weight, because of winter, and usually, in the winter people wear like sweat shirts, sweaters, stuff that doesn't really make your body too noticable, and now that its summer, and your wearing tighter clothes, shorts and such, you notice. just go outside, be active, and try to cut out junk food. and you'll be fine. (:

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well i have acne and its not TERRIBLE but i do have it and i have scars and VERY oily skin. would proactiv really clear my skin and keep it clear? honest answers are appreciated i'd just like alot of input. thank you!

I hated it.

It only works for some people. And I have the same type of skin as you, and it didn't do anything. And I used it for like 3 months. I don't know, I just didn't like it. But now, all I use is anti bacterial soap, what i use is called dial. it works really well. and you can find it basically anywhere that sells soap. (:

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i got a kitten like a little less then a month ago and she hates me. like i lleave her in her cage b4 i go 2 skool and when i take her out to feed her or play with her she bites me and just wants to run around my room. like how do i make her like me? like how can i show her i care? also, my mom is alergic to cats so my kitty has to stay in my room all day long and she stays in her cage and she isnt aloud to get out well only out of the cage but not out of my room and my room is starting to stink how can i make it not stink and what should i do about my cat? thanks bunches!

its probably scared. and it may be teething. my dog does that, i mean it is just a baby, and there teeth are just coming in. buy it lots of toys, and cuddle with it, and talk to her, and feed her little treats. it takes awhile to bond with pets sometimes. oh and get febreeze. or those air scent things. (: thats what i did.

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I'm a teenager and I've been going out with my boyfriend for 7 months. I love him so much and he loves me. I think I'm ready to have sex, but there is no way I'd do it with just a condom. I'd be so scared it would break. I wouldn't be able to sleep or enjoy anything, yet I don't know how to get on the pill without either asking my mother which she would pass out because I'm "too young" or having to go to planned parenthood and getting a pelvic exam. Now I know when I'm older I need pelvic exams, but there isn't a need for one yet. I haven't had sex or anything and I'm not comfortable with a doctor I don't know down there on me. It took me a long time for even my boyfriend. I am not an easy girl and I have tried to wait as long as I can. I'm just afraid I won't be able to take it one day and not be prepared. So does anyone know how to get on it without having to go through either of those. Please help. Thanks Oh yeah I'm 14/f and my boyfriend is 16/m

I'm pretty sure, that you can't get it without your parents consent, since your only 14.

I don'tthink your ready. I mean 14? why do you want to grow up so fast? isn't that like against the law too? well, maybe thats 18. but, hes still older and should be responsible. and birth pills do sometimes fail. so what if you do end up pregnant? your boyfriend will be in jail, because im pretty sure its illegal, for you guys to do that.. and you'll have your whole intire life messed up never getting to be a kid again.

and you understand. i hope you learned a few things. trust me, you have your whole life to grow up, and do that stuff. your only a kid once.

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ok so as long as i can remmeber i have bitten my nails and now they are soooo small!!!! like i dont even know how i got them like that lol. and its a really bad habit. also i heard if i keep biting them i can get cancer is that true? and how can i stop biting my nails because its a habit from when i was like woo like 6 yrs old and i am 15! now lol

no, im pretty sure that you cant get cancer from biting your nails? what queerface said that? and, im not entirely sure of ways you can stop, besides getting a new habit. but, to make them grow, if you go to like target, and go to to the nail polish stuff, theres stuff to make them grow. (:

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im 14/f.
sorry this is going to be long..
okay well theres this guy and i really like him but its been really confusing lately. he is 16 years old and the sweetest guy ive ever met. i met him through one of my friends who used to date him.. she doesnt know that we talk as more than friends because im scared to tell her.. my friend and the guy i like have had a really complicated relationship because she hasnt really been to faithful.. they broke up but he told me that he still has feelings for her.. the thing is that she has a new boyfriend now who she really likes.. but her ex(the one i like) says he still likes her a lot.. he told me that he also likes me a lot and wants to be with me but doesnt think that it would be fair to me if we were together and he still had feelings for her..
oh yea..
because he is older than me.. my parents dont really approve of us being together.. everything is so confusing.. i really like him but i dont know if i can wait for him to decide who he wants.. :/

well one. thats not being a very good friend :/ why would you date your best friends ex? i dont know about you and your best friend, but me or my best friend, would flipp out. sooo, one point to not go out with him.

your parents dont approvve that will tottally complicate things. and make it hard for him and you. i agree with your parents though, i mean, even though you dont think thats a big age gap, hes alot more experienced.

then i dont think you should go out with him also, because hes not only liking you. you wanna be the only one. your only 14 theres plenty of guys you can go out with, and might i add, that are your age.



he may be sweet and you really like him, well a few months from now, or probably even sooner, youll meet someone who is sweeet, and you learn to really like.

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