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I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
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*large extended family
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*advanced college degree
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advice
i am a 24 yr old female. i live in a small family with my father and mother. my problem is that my father is a very aggressive person. he gets annoyed in everything and treats my mother very badly by abusing and cursing her. he is like this with everyone. he does not talk much with people and criticizes everyone. he has a very high ego problem because of which we have very less social link ups. although he has never put restrictions on us for spending money. financially he has given me and my mother all the authorities to use money that he earns but his behavior has depressed me and my mother so much that we sometimes think of dyeing. i have tried so many times to tell him that whatever he does is not good for his health and he must try to adjust with people around but he always refuses to do this by saying that he is never wrong and he do not need anyone in life as he can take care of himself. and he don't even allow us to talk to people those he does not like... we try very hard to keep him happy but a minute mistake leads to big quarrels in our home...because of his nature only my 19 yr old brother committed suicide in 2003.although he went in a bad company but my father, instead of helping him to come out of it, asked him to leave the house because of which he left this world... please suggest me what can do so that we can live happily in our small family and how can i make it easier for my mom and me to live with papa peacefully. i want to do it as soon as possible because i will get married in 1-2 yrs and i cannot leave my mother alone with him as m scared that he can also physically harm her by beating her. please help me
I'm going to start by saying that this may not be what you want to hear, but that's usually how advice works isn't it? First off, you can't change anyone's behavior. You can't change your father's behavior. You just can't do it. He is doing these terrible things because of who he is not because of you or your mother. None of this is your fault and there is nothing that you can do, no way that you can act, nothing you can say, or nothing that you can change to change him. He is an abuser and he needs help. You and your mother need to leave him. He will never stop. Neither of you deserve this and you have to get out before it's too late. I'm sure that you and your mother love your father, but this situation is just not working. A person cannot be allowed to treat other people the way your father is treating you. He will never stop and he will never change if you do not leave. Before you do anything, make sure you have a plan. It can be very dangerous to leave an abusive person because you could get seriously hurt or he may somehow prevent you for leaving. This website gives a description of exactly how you should do it: http://drphil.com/articles/article/543/. It can take a lot for a person to believe that what I have said is the truth for them. You may not believe that your situation is what I have described or that you are in serious danger and you need to get out. Do not be in denial about this, it's not helping anyone, especially your father. If you really don't believe that it is as bad as I have made it out to be, you should call this number: 1−800−799−7233. It is a domestic violence hotline. They would be able to talk to you about your situation and you can find out for sure if you should leave your father. From what you have described, it seems really bad. I'm sure there's more to it than what you have written, but no one deserves what you and your mother are going through. You can't change other people, you can only change yourself. Making things easier on an abuser won't stop the abuse. The only thing that will stop it is leaving it behind. You don't need him and you can be so much happier without him if you give yourself a chance. The good thing is that you won't be alone; you and your mother can do this together. Please, if anything, at least call the number. The people there are professionals whereas most of the people on this website are not, we're just regular Joe's that want to help. You need to talk to someone that knows a lot about this subject and can lead you in the right direction, whatever that direction may be.
I'm using linksys router and I'm not good with computers. I pressed the reset button on the back and nothing happened.
Most of these routers have the same default username and password.
username: admin
password: (leave blank)
If this doesn't work, try the reset button again. I believe that you have to hold it in for a full 30 seconds in order for it to reset.
In the future, try using a search engine to find the solution to these types of problems. There are probably tons of people with the exact same issue that have already asked this question and gotten it answered somewhere online.
Good luck, and let me know if you can get it to work!
I have been living with my boyfriend for the past three years. My family went nuts the very first time that I have introduced him to them. I graduated and earned a degree and he finished high school. I am rebellious from the start and my family doesn't approves him as my "husband". Since my dad and my mom was away from our home, I let him stay with me along with my sister who has always been my worst enemy. I am the eldest and aged 27 and wants to have my own family. Since we always have family disagreements about him, we ran away together. But things gets worse. I have a job and is highly compensated while he is unemployed. He has a single parent of 3 kids which he abandoned due to joblessness. He left them with his in-laws and now they were all mad at me. I know it sounds crazy that I believe in the "YOU AND ME AGAINST THE WORLD" drama but now Im starting to get fed up about it and that I want to quit the relationship but there's still a part of me that holds back. I am pushing him to work hard but his lack of credentials puts his eagerness behind him because he is always rejected. He was stressed out and nowadays, we always fight and argue over small things. I am so confused and I really did not know what to do :(
This answer may sound a little harsh, but it's not meant to. Your boyfriend has THREE children and he's NOT WORKING?? Are you kidding me? I'm not trying to be mean here, but that just astounds me. I know that I'm looking at this from an outside perspective based only on the information that you have given me and I don't know him at all, but come on. I'm sure that his lack of credentials wouldn't prevent him for working at McDonald's or retail in a mall. He needs to get a job - any job. Do not start a family with this person until he can prove that he can be a man and get his business together. It's not "you and me against the world" if it's self-inflicted. Do you really want to be with a person that "abandoned" his own children? That doesn't bode well for you. Do you ever wonder whether he'd still be with you if you weren't supporting him? My advice for you is to quit making excuses for him and give him the ultimatum that he needs. If he can't get a job and start supporting his children, you need to leave him. It would be the best thing for him either way. You can't continue to coddle and support him - you're 27! Give up the rebellious label that you've given yourself and just start making decisions based upon what is the right thing to do here. Yes, I'll bet you've got a lot of feelings for him and giving him an ultimatum might be extremely difficult. If you really care about him and yourself, though, it's something that needs to happen. Get a job or get out. I'll bet that if he was working and being a good father you'd have less to fight about. You're already considering leaving him anyway right? Put the decision on him. You don't want to spend the rest of your life with a deadbeat. You might not like that I'm using that word, but think about it - he's unemployed and he's got 3 kids that he has (in your own words) abandoned. That's pretty terrible. You could do so much better.
Hey everyone! How do you make an upside down question mark? Like this one
http://media.photobucket.com/image/upside%20down/PepperCat564/upsidedownquestionmark.png?o=8&sortby=sevendaysview
but in just regular text on the computer if you know what I mean? Also can you tell me what does an upsidedown question mark mean?
The shortcut doesn't work on my computer for some reason so it may not work on yours. It doesn't really matter what type of computer you have, what matters is the program you are typing in. If you are using Microsoft Word, click on "Insert" at the top of the window, then choose "Symbol". The inverted question mark should appear in this menu. You can also create your own shortcut if you want. A shortcut is a combination of keys that you press to get the symbol to appear without having to go to the symbol menu every time. If you aren't using Microsoft Word, I would suggest searching the Internet. "How to make an upside down question mark in [name of the program you're using]". Worst case scenario, just copy and paste from below. In the future, you should try using a search engine to find the answers to these types of questions. Good luck!
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Hi, I am 17 years old, and I have come to the point where I don't want to live anymore. Every time I find someone I like and end up with him, the only thing he wants is sex. So then I have to let him go b/c I realize the sweet things he had said to me were only to get to me to have sex with him. My heart hurts so much every time this happens, b/c I always thought they were being true to me. My other issue is that there's this girl in school that is always jealous of me b/c I'm friends with her best friend. My family treats me like I'm some stranger in the house. My mom and dad yell at me everyday for no reason. I feel like my life is worthless, no one cares about me. Now I feel like there is no one in this world I can trust anymore. I'm an object for guys, a stranger to my family, and my friends are being pulled away from me by their other friends. There's nothing I can do. I don't want to live anymore, I just hate everything and everyone!
Slow down. Think about all this for a minute. You're 17. It's just about time for you to either go to college or start a new life of your own. Don't worry about your family. In not too long, you won't have to deal with that on a regular basis. Depending on the type of people they are, you might be able to help fix this situation too. Have you ever talked to them about how you feel? Sometimes it's hard for parents to effectively communicate with their teenage children. It's not that they don't love you, they're just not picture perfect parents. I'm sure you're not a picture perfect daughter either. What I'm trying to say is that nobody's perfect. If they didn't love you, they'd just leave you alone. Try doing the mature thing and try to address the issues that you have with them by talking to them first before they start yelling. Maybe it won't work, maybe it will. If not, again, you'll be out of there soon anyway. There's no need to fret over a family that doesn't understand you when you'll be leaving soon. Once you do leave, things should slowly get better with them. It just takes some time.
As for the guys, I'm not sure what your particular relationships have been like, but it's definitely possible that you are mistaken about their intentions. You're at an age where people want to start having sex. You're not ready for it and it's not something that you want, but it's going to come up. If the guy is ready for it and he wants to try, does that make him a pig that's only in it for sex? No. It makes him human. Just because the guy wants to have sex with you doesn't mean that's all that he wants. It's possible that he actually does care about you and because of that he'd like to take the next step in the relationship. Have you tried to work things out with these guys or have you just overreacted and immediately dumped them? Take a step back and look at things from their perspectives. Were they just trying to use you for sex or did they just end up wanting to have sex with their awesome girlfriend? Never have sex if you're not ready for it. The fact that he wants it and you don't could end a relationship, but it doesn't necessarily make him a bad guy.
As for your friends, this is what happens at the age that you're at. Again, just chill for a year or two, hold your head high and be the mature one about things. Everyone else your age is as experiencing a lot of the same issues as you are so cut them a little slack. Eventually, everyone else will be mature about friendships too.
This isn't the time to not want to live anymore just because you're having normal teenage problems. You're not alone in this. Most teenagers go through stuff just like what you're going through. This is the time to get past your problems and start building the life that you want to live. It's a transition time; it's going to be a little awkward and a little difficult, but the good stuff is yet to come. Don't give up before you've even had the chance to live. You can work through these problems and come out a stronger, better person.
20female Joe 19. This might be a little long but I'll return the favor! :)
So I've known Joe for about 5 years now. We used to be close but we have grown apart over the years. We still see each other but not every day like we used to.
Anyways, basically there is a lot of sexual tension between us. We flirt a lot, but we have never done anything. Seriously I would have sex with him in a second. That sounds kind of slutty but it's true. Please don't say anything about you shouldn't have sex with your friends, etc.
So here are some examples of what he does when we're together. Tell me if you think he's into me or you think he's joking around.
So we went to the casino tonight with my two cousins, Joe and his friend. Me Joe and his friend were in the back seat on the way there. First, Joe goes to put his seat belt on and purposely grabs my butt and I just look at him and he smiles at me. Then at the casino i'd be on the opposite side of him and he would be staring at me and I'd catch him and then he'd wink at me and then start kind of laughing. Then he'd ask what I was doing tonight and at the same time I said "Not you ;)" and he said "Me?" and we both started laughing. I would of said "you" being serious but I sort of panicked. Then on the way home we were messing with my Ipod seeing what song we wanted and he was like here let me pick one, and I was still holding it but basically his hand was over mine kind of holding it. THEN we were sitting in the car and i layed my head on his friend cause we were tired and i stretched my legs on Joe and he put his hand between my legs and started rubbing the outside of my vagina through my jeans (for like 30 sec) and then he just left his hand there for about 5 min but then when his friend left and we were still in the car i was laying all the way down with my legs still on him (his hand wasn't on me anymore) and he had the chance to do whatever he wanted but he was playing some dumb game on his Ipod. And then he was like alright I think it's time to go home, and he left.
Just at times it seems like he doesn't really want me, because it seems like he has chances but doesn't take it. When he touches me I don't push his hand away or anything. But when he asks or brings up sex or something I freeze up. And I know a lot of the times he's like joking around when he says stuff like that, but is being serious about it too. But then other times he does all that stuff and will touch me and everything.
Do you think maybe I'm giving him mixed signals? I feel like he is giving me mixed signals. And to be honest, I would be like let's go and start making out with him and whatever but I don't know if that's what he wants! I'm too afraid to make a move, I want HIM to. But I never know if he's being serious or joking. I'm almost 98% sure he would hook up with me, but then there is that 2% that has doubts. What should i do, am I not putting myself out there enough? The only time I have brought up sex with him was in September when I texted him and he was like "you wanna have sex with me?" And I was like "Haha i don't know if you can handle it though ;)" And he was like "Oh please! Yes i could!" But nothing ever came from that. So I feel like if we're together one of us has to make a move, rather than planning it out or something awkward. I feel like we're both too afraid to make a move, in case the other one doesn't feel the same.
How can I put myself out there, and maybe make a subtle move on him that's not really obvious but would get things going? And we're usually always with friends, so it's hard sometimes.
Does he want you? Yes! No guy is going to touch you like that if they don't. I think that what's happening is that because you are friends, he is trying to be more respectful. He isn't going to make a move because he isn't sure if you want to be with him. Whatever words you have been saying to each other don't mean anything. He probably isn't sure that you want him because flirting can be hard to figure out. You never really know if someone is being serious or just having fun. You've put yourself in a position where you can't wait for him to make the first move if you want anything to happen. Think of it from his perspective. You lied down on the other guy. He touched you and you didn't react. Whenever the two of you flirt, it turns into a joke. He's really been putting himself out there. Just buck up and say something. Don't let it turn into just joking around. You've got to keep it serious. Mention what he did in the car. That's a huge tell. Why does he have to do all the work? He put the ball in your court when he did that. Ever think that he's just as nervous as you? You could end up letting a good thing pass you by if you don't step up!
Will it be awkward if my vagina is all hairy when i have sex? What if his isnt? What do i dooo!
As soon as I got it I hated it. If you really don't like it, you can get rid of it, just shave it off. If you really don't mind it too much and are just worried about what a sexual partner will think, it's ok to ask them. They'd probably rather know than be surprised. It's not good to change yourself for someone else, but when it comes to hair and sex, it's not like you're changing your personality, you just want to make sex more enjoyable. In the end it's your decision, but there's nothing wrong with asking an opinion. :)
The title says it all i guess, it's a little embarrassing but i want to know, i've heard it's normal though. I'm 100% NOT addicted to it or anything and i hardly ever watch it but i like to masterbate to it, is that bad? thank you for the answers
I would guess that it's not "normal", but there's definitely nothing wrong with it. It's certainly normal to be curious and instead of just sitting around being curious, you're taking care of some of that curiosity. Just be careful. Even though there's nothing wrong with it, there's always somebody that will have a problem with it. Delete your Internet history and don't watch it when someone could walk in on you. Try not to talk about it with your friends unless they bring it up because they do it too. It's a very personal thing and some people aren't as open to it as others. Don't worry though, there's nothing wrong with you so don't feel bad or guilty. You're definitely not the only one, curiosity about sex is very, very natural.
My boyfriend and I have great sex. The issue is, he has trouble making me come quickly. While I myself can take care of it in 10 minutes, it takes him anywhere from 15 minutes to 30, or 40. Not an issue for me. But he has ADHD and gets bored, and feels like he dosent have the energy. But he dosent want to never get me off and just think of himself, so sometimes, hard on or no, he will avoid sex entirely due to the fact that he dosent have the energy to try to get me off. This really hurts my feelings and I have no idea what I'm supposed to do about it. I told him that fine, I will just take care of me, just lets have sex, and I'll take care of me afterwards. Advice? Comments?
Situations like this suck because there's not an easy answer and it's not really anybody's fault. I'm not going to knock your boyfriend because sometimes sex can be tiring and if it does take a long time, you just want to get on to something else, especially if you're waiting on your partner. It doesn't mean he's bad or lazy and it doesn't mean anything is wrong with you. It really can take a lot of energy. My advice is to more or less, "pregame". Taking care of yourself afterward is much less fun than actually finishing with him. Get yourself started first instead of finishing after. Put yourself in a better position to orgasm quicker and 30 minutes may turn into 10. It may be hard to break the regular pattern and try this out and there is a possibility that it will somehow hurt his feelings, but it's worth a try. If you're worried that it will hurt his feelings, talk it over with him beforehand. Good luck!
what are the disadvantages of masterbration ?
If you have a significant other and they find out, they might not like it and it could cause problems. They might have a hard time understanding that just because you masturbate doesn't mean that you don't want to be with them.
what will happen we daily doing handjob??
It's normal for people to do this. As long as you don't do it way too much and become addicted, you're fine. Nothing bad will happen, it's actually good for you!
http://www.menshealth.com/health/health-and-sexual-benefits-masturbation
can a brother make sex with his sister
It's not a good idea. If your question is about you, try to find a way to get over wanting to. People will tell you it's totally wrong and make you feel like crap, but you can't just make the desire go away just because other people tell you it's wrong. The desire may never go away, but you do need to find a way to cope with it because it is not a good idea and it is not the right thing to do. Have you talked to your sibling about it? Do they feel the same way? Try thinking about it and masturbating instead of actually doing it. You probably see your sibling every day and that closeness could be what's causing these feelings to come up. Try to become close with someone else. Have sex with them instead and try to move on. As long as you don't actually go through with having sex with your sibling, you can get past it with no harm done.
Heeeey,
i am 13 years old and i am quite small and 'petite'.
i really want to start my first period as all my friends have. i have had all the signs but it just doesnt seem to be coming. does anyone know anyways to make it come faster. now, i dont want any crap like 'it'll come when its ready' or 'your mad! why would you want it? its horrible!!' because i know i will probs regret it when it comes but i just want it now!!
please heeellppp meee...
thank you =)
I know what you're feeling and it sucks. People are telling you "you're lucky" and "why would you want it", but you just want it to happen already! It reminds me of a quote from a movie "I don't want to be in a battle, but waiting on the edge of one I can't escape is even worse" (lol). In the movie they were talking about war, but it's almost like the same thing right? I didn't get mine until I was 14 and I was freaking out because it seemed like everyone else had theirs already. My mom told me that she didn't get hers until she was 16 and that helped me feel a little better. Unfortunately, there's nothing you can do to speed it up. Try to be patient and at least know that when you get it, you know what it is. Girls that get it too early may not have been told about it yet and don't know what to do. Since you do have all the signs, it will probably come soon, don't stress.
Me and the guy I have been fooling around with have talked about having sex in a canoe. Has anyone tried this? Like what would be the best way to go about it? And please don't say don't do it because we still will, whether we succeed or not lol.
It sounds like a great fantasy, but I think that if you were to try it, it would end up being rather disappointing and the fantasy will be ruined. When I first read it, I was like wow, sex in a canoe, how awesome does that sound! Then I thought about it and what turned me off from it wasn't the danger of getting caught or tipping over or anything. I really can't imagine that it would be very comfortable! Canoes don't have a lot of room to move around and they aren't padded on the bottom. Even if you laid down towels or something, there's metal sticking up from the bottom and beams going across the top. Before you actually try it, lie down in a canoe and see if it would really be worth it. If you still like the idea, then I say go for it. Just be aware that it might not be as great in the canoe as it is in your head!
whats the rapture coming? i dont get it
With all the studying that Mr. Camping has done of the Bible, it humors me that he seems to have completely missed/ignored this passage:
Matthew 24:36-39
But of that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, but My Father only. But as the days of Noah were, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be. For as in the days before the flood, they were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, until the day that Noah entered the ark, and did not know until the flood came and took them all away, so also will the coming of the Son of Man be.
Anyone that predicts the rapture is either greedy for money and attention or is actually crazy. Do not believe their crap!
My ex-girlfriend and I go to different colleges and were long distance for awhile because of it. We're no longer together but are on good terms and are pretty good friends, and she just revealed to me that sometimes (even while we were together), when she would sit down for class she would knowingly let her thongs ride up for random guys.
I'm not asking how I should feel about that (I don't really care), but I was just curious what you guys would think of it.
I don't know her so I can't make assumptions to her personality, but since you don't really care about this and you're still friends with her, my guess is that she's not an all out attention-whore or psychotic in any way. My thoughts are that she did/does this because she likes to feel sexy. Who doesn't? It's human nature for people to be unsure of their looks and wonder if other people think they're good-looking. It feels really good to know that others find you attractive and showing a little thong is a healthy way to discover that. Unlike psychotic sluts, she doesn't need to sleep around to feel this satisfaction. There's nothing wrong with being sexy in college and she's going about it in a very responsible, mature way. She'll probably grow out of it when she starts to feel more confident in herself, but for now, it's not really a big deal. If she's still doing this when she's 40, then there's a problem :)
When masturbating, I find the most success with targeting my G-spot. When I try to orgasm through clitoral stimulation, there isn't the same effect. I don't get the same rush. It doesn't even feel all that good. But when I read about masturbation, G-spot orgasms seem REALLY rare. What is going on? G-spot orgasms aren't hard for me to achieve on my own and I am sure it is an orgasm.
In short, no, it's not normal. The majority of women have a difficult time orgasming through G-spot stimulation. A lot of women just don't masturbate and, in turn, don't know their bodies as well as those that do. Many women can't achieve orgasm at all. I don't think G-spot orgasms are as rare as they're made out to be, but they can't be considered "normal" from a numbers standpoint.
All that said, why does it matter? Who cares? I'd wager that many of these normal women would rather have what you have. Their partners probably would too! You're lucky!
I'm 15 and this has kinda been an emotional year. My dog has died, I hate my job, I have had to deal with high school drama which I get is normal for my age but this year I've seemed more sad then I ever have before and I'm not the only one who has noticed. Summer vacation just started and its only the second day and I've been crying for most of it for random reasons or for no reason at all? Is there something wrong with me I just can't hold my tears in and I don't know why?
Judging by your age, this probably has something to do with puberty. You're at the age when hormones are running wild and mood swings or feeling depressed is actually a common thing. I remember going through times like this even when everything was going great in my life. The slightest thing would set me off and I'd just start crying out of nowhere.
My advice to you is not to "suck it up", but to just keep it in your head that whatever strange emotional problems you are having will go away as you get a little older. This is a just a time that you have to get through.
Talking about it can definitely help. There are lots of people that want to help and will support you. For me personally, when I tried to talk to my friends about it they didn't really understand and honestly, being teenagers themselves, they had similar problems of their own and couldn't have helped me much. For you, it might be just fine to talk to your friends, but I found that what helped the most was actually talking to one of my teachers about it. I didn't really like her, but she noticed that something was wrong and asked me about it. If you can find someone a little older to talk to, they might be able to offer some wiser words of wisdom than a friend could.
Good luck and remember that life isn't going to be like this forever. You'll get a new job, you'll eventually smile from memories of your dog, and high school drama will end with high school. Try to enjoy your summer and don't worry when you start to feel sad. Just cry for a little while and then do something fun. :)
17/f
i just wanted to know if this would be considered rape. so heres the story.
i was at a new year's party last year. i was with my best guy friend. i drank and smoked a blunt with him. i got drunk and high but he didn't. we went to the beach to go swimming, i took off my clothes except for bra and undies, he took off everything but his boxers. i don't know how ALL of my clothes came off or telling him it was okay for him to take my virginity. it was almost as if i blacked out for a little while, when i opened my eyes i felt the worst pain i've ever felt although i wasn't sure what was going on. he asked if i wanted him to stop, i still didn't know what was happening and i replied no. very shortly after i realized what was happening and i told him to stop and he did. i was a virgin and he wasn't. i wonder if this is rape because i never gave him permission from the beginning. i know he definately took advantage of me after being drunk and high and nowhere near my right mind.
thank you
Absolutely it's rape. I have no idea what the other columnists are thinking. No way is it your fault! You shouldn't have been drinking or smoking, but that has nothing to do with the fact that he took advantage of you. Since you were drunk/high you couldn't give consent. That's how the law works. You should go after him. What he did to you was completely wrong.
You answered a question on 02-23-2010 stating that they had the xox wired to the modem and to go out and purchase a router. The question was "Why does my xbox lag when other users are on WIRELESS divices. I am having the same problem as I have a router and my xbox in wired and as soon as some one goes on a WIRELESS laptop or Ipod the xbox laggs and or looses conection completely. I saw some where it has something to do with the NAL connection on my XBOX but with the new NXE dashboard version I can not find that menu and see what it is saying. They say that if it says Moderate or Strict you will have the lagging problem until you fix that. HELP how would I fix that?
Hi, it is doing that because you only have so much bandwidth. Your connection can only support a certain amount of information coming in and going out at once. A router won't make a difference and it doesn't matter if you are using wireless or wired devices, they are all using bandwidth. Wireless devices just send the information through the air instead of through a cord right to the same place. Think of it like a highway. When you are just playing around on the internet, maybe there's a car or two. When you are on xbox live, there's a lot of traffic. When you are on xbox live and downloading a movie, the road is full and things will start to get jammed up because your connection can't handle it. The only way to solve this is to switch to an internet service provider that offers more bandwidth or contact your current provider to see if you can increase it (like adding more lanes to your highway). I know that Time Warner offers better versions of Roadrunner for a slightly higher price. Otherwise, you'll have to turn off your other devices to avoid lag, I don't think there's any way around it. You must either have a really bad connection or you are downloading huge amounts of information while trying to play xbox. Either get a better connection or go a little easier on the downloading.