|
humorist-workshop
Family vs lovelife vs self
I have been living with my boyfriend for the past three years. My family went nuts the very first time that I have introduced him to them. I graduated and earned a degree and he finished high school. I am rebellious from the start and my family doesn't approves him as my "husband". Since my dad and my mom was away from our home, I let him stay with me along with my sister who has always been my worst enemy. I am the eldest and aged 27 and wants to have my own family. Since we always have family disagreements about him, we ran away together. But things gets worse. I have a job and is highly compensated while he is unemployed. He has a single parent of 3 kids which he abandoned due to joblessness. He left them with his in-laws and now they were all mad at me. I know it sounds crazy that I believe in the "YOU AND ME AGAINST THE WORLD" drama but now Im starting to get fed up about it and that I want to quit the relationship but there's still a part of me that holds back. I am pushing him to work hard but his lack of credentials puts his eagerness behind him because he is always rejected. He was stressed out and nowadays, we always fight and argue over small things. I am so confused and I really did not know what to do :(
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
This answer may sound a little harsh, but it's not meant to. Your boyfriend has THREE children and he's NOT WORKING?? Are you kidding me? I'm not trying to be mean here, but that just astounds me. I know that I'm looking at this from an outside perspective based only on the information that you have given me and I don't know him at all, but come on. I'm sure that his lack of credentials wouldn't prevent him for working at McDonald's or retail in a mall. He needs to get a job - any job. Do not start a family with this person until he can prove that he can be a man and get his business together. It's not "you and me against the world" if it's self-inflicted. Do you really want to be with a person that "abandoned" his own children? That doesn't bode well for you. Do you ever wonder whether he'd still be with you if you weren't supporting him? My advice for you is to quit making excuses for him and give him the ultimatum that he needs. If he can't get a job and start supporting his children, you need to leave him. It would be the best thing for him either way. You can't continue to coddle and support him - you're 27! Give up the rebellious label that you've given yourself and just start making decisions based upon what is the right thing to do here. Yes, I'll bet you've got a lot of feelings for him and giving him an ultimatum might be extremely difficult. If you really care about him and yourself, though, it's something that needs to happen. Get a job or get out. I'll bet that if he was working and being a good father you'd have less to fight about. You're already considering leaving him anyway right? Put the decision on him. You don't want to spend the rest of your life with a deadbeat. You might not like that I'm using that word, but think about it - he's unemployed and he's got 3 kids that he has (in your own words) abandoned. That's pretty terrible. You could do so much better.
]
More Questions: |