about

I'm a mother of 2 boys who are 13 months apart. Talk about a handful. I'm a wife to the best husband I could have ever dreamed of.
I'm one of the very blessed.


I have Bipolar 1 Disorder. I hate taking all these medications and always going to doctors appointments, but life is too short to let mental illness get the better of me.


Often times life is a challenge, and nobody knows that better than me. I wake up wondering if this is going to be a day my illness overpowers my meds, and either sends me flying like a bat out of hell, or leaves me laying on the couch like a wet dish rag.


Thank all that is good in the world that I have an excellent support system at home.
I'm one of the lucky ones.


I'm honest, and that can either be a perk or s flaw. Depends on how you choose to look at it.
I like to see it as a perk, because it's better to hear the truth than to be told candy coated bullshit.







advice

My best friend had been going through this really slutty stage lately and I'm getting really annoyed. She started to get this mind set that because i've hooked up with guys tons of times she NEEEDS to also (she never has). She thinks in order to achieve this goal she needs to be as slutty as possible. Shell go up to guys and like pull her shirt down so her cleavage hangs out!! Or shell ask them if they want a handjob! I've tried to tell her that hooking up is for people who care about eachother and not for fun (for me at least) but she tells me that I'm going at it all wrong.

Yesterday she sent a picture of herself topless to a guy friend and this is seriously the last straw. What can I say to make her understand that being slutty doesn't get guys!!?

Well, there isn't much you can say other than what you already have. She chooses to be slutty- nothing you can do about it.
What you can do, is be a good friend to her and be supportive when her technique fails her. Be sure that she is educated on the dangers of unsafe sex, because you need to know that stuff yourself.

[view]


hey. 14/f. so last year in 7th grade there was this girl, and we were pretty good friends, because we had all of our classes together. well, this year (8th grade) we have 1 class together and we still talk, but only in that one class. well, shes like in the really "popular" croud and on the 13th her and her friend (really really popular) are having their b day partys together. so in this 1 class we are in together, we are the only people to talk to each other. cause like all of the other kids are 7th graders and we just never talk to them. and she was telling me about their party and how they are inviting pretty much everyone in the 8th grade. and she told me that i was gonna get an invitation. so today i go to school and everyone is talking about how they got an invatation and how excited they are for the party. but of course, i did not get one. and she told me i would! tomorrow is when we have our 1 class together, but i'm not sure if i want to talk to her because i'm really kinda pissed. and no, its not just the mail or anything. i live in HER town-the exact same town as her, and people that live like 20 min away already have hers. and i just don't know what to do. i feel like ignoring her, but idk. i just think it is rude how she said i would be invited, yet i did not get an invite. so what should i do?? thanx!

I think I would give her a chance to get you the invite, before you assume you aren't getting one. The party isn't for three days, and you share that class tomorrow. Maybe she is going to personally deliver yours during class?

If you don't get the invite, next time you have class together after the party, ask her "how did the party go? I would have come to join in the fun, but the invitation may have gotten lost in the mail..."
That will give you a chance to ask why you didn't get one, without sounding rude, in a beat around the bush manner, and give her a chance to explain herself as well. Because you definitely want to give her a chance to explain her side of things before you jump the gun and be pissed off.

[view]


One of my closest friends told me something about themselves, and it's like, really dark, most people wouls stop being friends with another because of this.
But, I accept it, she's still my friend, who i would do anything for.

She's afraid I'm lying about accepting it because her Ex-BF said he did then broke up with her a few months later, calling her an inhumane monster without a trace of a soul.
So she's afraid I'm going to do the same.
I've known this Person for almost 10 years now, she got me through some of the toughest times of my life, and for a logn time, we were each others only friend, I lvoe her like family, and I'm not sure how to tell her how much her friendship means to me, and How to convince her of the truth; That I still See her as an amzing beautiful person, And i'm always going to there for her.

As the old saying goes, actions speak louder than words.
You can tell her and tell her until you puke coat hangers that you accept it and she is still your friend, but she won't believe it until you prove that you feel that way.
That takes time and patience, and not bringing it up anymore. I promise she will see and know the truth about you in due time.

[view]


Sorry, wasn't sure where to put this.

So I just used some wax strips on my legs. The kind where the wax is already on the strips.
I've never waxed my legs before, just my brows. Anyway, I've got red spots all over my leg. I have some on the other leg too but only in some places and not as much as the other leg.

Is this normal? I know redness is normal but are the spots?
Thanks.

Just to let you know, those red spots? That is where the hair used to be. It is just the follicle inflamed, because you just ripped out all that hair by the roots.
Do like the others said- use the moisturizers.

[view]


I have a really weird question. There's this guy that I go to school with that I knew for awhile. We aren't good friends, but we talk sometimes. I have this gut feeling that he likes me. This probably sounds stupid, but he doesn't show that he likes me. He doesn't do any of the signs that you may find on google. The only proof I would have is my own gut feeling. He doesn't really 'stare' per say, but I really don't know why I'm getting the feeling that he does. Is this totally crazy and am I being irrational? any ideas? thanks.

You know, your gut can tell you a lot. It seems that many live life by "signs" other people give, but they don't act on their own, such as gut instinct.
What is the harm in following your gut?
Maybe you should flirt with him a little and see what becomes of it.

[view]


For my 13th birthday i wanted to do something my friends will remember for adges. I originally thaught bowling then sleepover but my mum hasnt agreed to a sleepover ( she will though). I looked up some party theams and i really like the theam kidnap. Thats where you send each friend a fake invite for a norm party. They wont susspect a thing. You ask your mum to ring each friends mum and ask them if you can go kidnapp there kid while there sleepin. I really wanna do this but how can i do this when ill be kidnappin them in the morn going bowling but it will be to early for them to come over for the sleepover. Can anyone think of something ither REALLY cheap or priceless i can do to fill the time ?

A friend of mine had a birthday party/sleepover for her 16th.
We went to the video store and rented what we thought to be the scariest movies.
After her parents went to bed, we started the horror movie marathon with the only light in the house being the flickering television.
Let me tell you- gather a few teen girls in the dark dead of night with a some good horror flicks, and it becomes something memorable...
:)

[view]


At the begining of the school year, there was a guy in my Spanish class. Gradually we became really close friends, and the more I hung out with him, the more I relized that I really liked him. At both of my best friends pressuring, I told him that I liked him.

How I told him is that I wrote a note telling him. I know it was very childish to do so but I am happy now that I did not tell him in person.

His response to me telleing him was that 'He would never consider being more than friends with a black person.' His words exactly, then after a few days of me fuming and wanting to kill him, he says that he only said that to spare my feelings. He said that he really did not like me the way I liked him, but I think he was lying. Now I feel a little uncomfortable around him, should I tell him how I feel about him now? Or should I leave well enough alone. I'll take any advice. I am an African American female, and he is a white male.

As for continuing your friendship with the guy, do what you think is best for you.

I think, that just because he doesn't want to date outside of his race that it doesn't make him a bad person, or a bad friend. However, I think he went about it the wrong way in telling you that.

One way to straighten this out is to do like you say- tell him what you feel about it. Tell him how it made you feel for him to say that to you. How exactly was he sparing your feelings? I know I would have been hurt by what he said. He didn't have to say that he could never be more than friends with a black person. He could have just simply said "sorry, I don't like you that way."

You need to discuss your feelings with him. Let him know that he hurt you with that comment. If he is a real friend, he will listen to you and try to work out the problem. Maybe after you work it out, then you can put it behind you, because you are right- if the hurt never goes away, it will only damage your friendship.

[view]


Ok so I'm taking a birth control called reclipsen....and so far i took it for a month and a week.....well the first month it made my stomach hurt pretty much the whole time until i got my period...so im guessing thats a side effect....but when it came to the sugar pills i only took three of them...for the week and didnt take the other ones...that doesnt effect the prevention right? I did start on the pill once that week was over... but im kind of bad at remembering to take my pill.....but ive either taken it as soon as i remembered or two the next day...so am i fully protected?

http://www.healthtouch.com/bin/EContent_HT/dnoteShowLfts.asp?fname=04756&title=Reclipsen+(Oral)%2C+See+%7CORAL+CONTRACEPTIVES+(Oral)+(Tablet%2C+Tablet%2C+Chewable)+%7C+&cid=HTDRUG

The link above gives information on the drug you are taking, including side effects. Stomach cramps are included in the side effects.

I can't tell you if you are fully protected, because I didn't come across anything that talked of your situation. My suggestion is to consult your pharmacist about that. Knowing how drugs work is what they are trained to know.

[view]


16/f

i have always had a hot temper but it used to take ALOT to make me let it out, and when i did i would mostly just yell then go up to my room and lay down away from everybody until it went down

But lately the smallest things absolutely ruin my day. when i lose my temper which is a daily thing now, i cannot say anything otherwise my dad who's temper is byfar the worst i have ever seen will flare. so i twist and pinch my arm while he yells at me. i then go to my room and throw things, punch my pillows and walls, scream as loud as i can into my pillows and trash my room. when im tired i cry for hours. the rest of the day i cannot talk to anybody. just the voice of somebody who wants to talk to me makes me feel angry all over again. I wake up everyday in such a good mood but my temper always seems to take the day away from me.

how can i control my temper? it's ruining my life

Being one with a very hot temper myself, I agree with clarayow. (I, too, inherited mine from my dad...)
I was once like you, got to where I seriously blew my top daily. Then it progressed to several times daily, until I was just an outright bitch all day.
Trust me, you want to learn to control it. Letting it out only makes yourself and the ones around you miserable. Look at yourself. You are pinching yourself. That is no good at all.

I agree that seeing a councilor to help you learn to control it would be good- you need to find out what all of this anger is stemming from.

However, I, speaking from personal experience, would take caution in taking pills for it. I had a doctor put me on different pills like I was a guinea pig for two and a half years. Some made me too tired and dopey to function, and some made my temper worse- turning me into an absolute monster.

But everyone is different, as with every case. My problem stemmed from Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. The pills they give you are for a chemical imbalance in your brain. I had no chemical imbalance, but the pills were causing me to have it. That's why I say take caution. Pills didn't solve my problem, they created worse problems.

[view]


OK, i like this guy that works at pacsun, i've only talked to him once and only seen him once,but i'm completely love struck and i don't know why. I don't even know his name, because his name tag was flipped around. My friend even asked his hours but not his name, i need to know who he is because i can search him on myspace, is there anything you could do to help me find his name?
heres a few details:
longer dark brown hair;
tan;
works at pacsun in the southern park mall;
Boardman, Ohio;
works the evenings on every night;

age:14
gender:female

p.s. i'm not a stalker haha and i never will be

I'm confused. This guy is someone you can go talk to, yet you are looking for someone to find him on myspace?

It would be easier to just go in and try to check out his name tag. Better yet, go ASK him his name so you know he notices you.

[view]


me and my boyfriend play this game on the phone where we ask each other questions like "have you ever been in love?" and stuff like that. i need a list of questions i can ask him. thanks :]

Have you ever bent to tie your shoe in a very crowded public place and heard a tearing noise coming from the back of your pants?

Ok, so that's probably not what you are looking for, but what's the harm? You may both get a good laugh.

[view]


my bff just recenly introduced me to her crush and ugh..i think i'm starting to crush on him too. hes like everything i've been looking for and i have no clue what to do. but right now i'm just keeping my emotions to myself and letting her have her crush with him. but i did tell her to ask him who he liked or flirt more or something to hint to him more to get something going between them. but any suggestions on what to do about the situation. should i tell her? should i just wait it all out and see what happens between them? and oh yeah tonight her and i hung out with him and a few other guys andi talked to him more than she did. you can't even tell she likes him except a few times she'll do somethings and he'll do little things too but i don't think theres anything. just please give me some suggestions on what to do because i have no clue and i don't wann lose a bff.

If you don't want to hurt your friend then you need to forget about him for a while. Meaning, no, don't tell her, and no, don't act on your feelings.

If something ends up happening between her and him, then so be it. If not, then so be it.

Let her get over her crush and move on to a different one before you consider telling her or acting upon your feelings for this guy.

I promise you that it is for the best if you want to keep her your bff.

[view]


me and my boyfriend have been going out for almost 7 months....and im getting mixed feelings from myself...he says he loves me and he really does...and i dont want to brake his heart and i like him but idk how much i like him and idk what feelings i am having..can some1 please helpp

please.

Just because he is ready to love you doesn't mean you have to be ready to love him back.

If you like him and want to stay together, then don't dictate braking up with him because you don't love him back. You may feel love for him soon enough.

[view]


Can you tell if someones in to you?

Well, they are into you if you can feel them in there...

[view]


I really think you give amazing advice, and you are truly an amazing person from my understanding.
I added you as one of my favorite columnists :)
Have a good easter!

Thank you so much for the compliment! I try my best!

I wish for the Easter bunny to poop many eggs for you! LOL

No need to rate me since I didn't answer a question.

:D

[view]


Okey well all my friends are all most the sam,
well when it comes two this.

okey so thay ask me if i can do something & if i cant ill tell them and say where on the phone & the`ll be like OH well i gotta go or just stop talking. or be like can i call you back later & never call me backk

im a a suckkyyy friend?

I am confused.

If you are the one who says you will call them back and then don't, then you are.

If they are the ones who say they will call you back and then don't, then they are. Especially if they are not calling back because you couldn't do something with them. If you can't, then you can't.

[view]


i dont know what is going on my anus hole itches so badly i know i dont have pinworms or anything because they told me to check my poop and i found nothing so if anyone can help i would be so grateful

It is a possibility that you may have hemorrhoids. They can either be on the outside, meaning you can feel them when you wipe yourself, or on the inside.

I believe they itch because they can tear or become inflamed if your stools are too hard, and they are itchy as they start to heal back up.

If you think this is a possibility, you can try some Preparation H and see if it stops the itching.

[view]


I want to wish my crush happy easter, the thing is im afraid ill regret it, he lives very far away, ive had a crush on him for 4 years, we emailed regurarly for 3 years, and then i guess he lost interest in me, and now i havnt seen him online for about 6 months (i think he blocked me, dont know why) should i still wish him a hapyy easter? im afriad ill be crushed when he doesnt answer, is there any funny way of wishing someone happy easter (not too sentimental?) so he thinks im doing it as a friend and that i dont like him.. what do you think? should i?

Should you wish him happy Easter? Why not? There is no harm in it. Why should you regret it? Think of it this way- we wish perfect strangers a merry Christmas (if they celebrate it) and feel no regret, right?
So why should you regret wishing this guy a happy Easter?
Either he will reply, or he will ignore you. If he ignores your friendly greeting, then at least you know for certain that you should just move on with your life.

Funny way of saying it? Wishing for the Easter bunny to poop out many eggs for you! Happy Easter!
Ok, so maybe that's not what you are looking for, but it was all I could come up with.

By the way- Happy Easter to you, and I don't regret wishing it to you, weather you reply or not! :)

[view]


My best friend since 1st grade hates my b/f of one year. and vice versa. It's so bad that they literally can't be around each other for more then 5 seconds w/out getting in a big fight. My friend gets mad and wants me to dump him but my b/f is usually very sweet and I'm crazy about him. I hate that they fight and don't know what to do because sometimes he is at fault and other times it's her. I've basically stopped defending either of them and neither are happy about it but I'm so confused. My friend is strong and idependant so she never stops but my b/f is an idiot on this issue and doesn't listen when I tell him to back off. What do I do?!

Well, you tell them both that if they have any respect for you, they will do their best to get along.
If you are happy with this guy, then your happiness comes first and foremost. If your friend chooses to not respect you enough to get along with your boyfriend, then she isn't a very good friend, now is she?

[view]


15/f I want my arm hair removed, but I don't want to shave it off, because I heard it comes back thicker and darker and faster, and I also hear these stories about people who have shaved their arms really regret it. Since waxing your legs after a while, it doesn't really grow back would the same technique happen to your arms? I've tried bleaching and stuff and its not like I have a lot of arm hair its just long pieces of it, I even tried trimming my arm hair lol.

So my question is has anyone had their arm hair waxed and how did it work, cause I really want to wax it, but I don't want to regret waxing it. (ps. I'm talking about arm hair not arm pit hair)
thanks so much!!

If you opt not to wax, try using Nair. It makes the hair grow back thinner, softer, and lighter, unlike shaving.
I'm not sure how waxing effects the new hair growth, because I'm not fond of self torture (LOL) but I have used Nair on my legs and I got the results on the new growth as I described above.

[view]



<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>

eXTReMe Tracker