|
| |
|
OK so I am a lesbian and consider myself out of the closet, as in my friends and family all know and I am comfortable telling people. This one girl isn't homophobic she's just really annoying about it. Like she keeps thinking I have a crush on her even though she is really fat and ugly...she also always has to say she is straight. Like if I say "my hair is not straight, just like me." She'll have to chime in with "my hair is straight just like me." and it's really fucking irritating. She also has to constantly point out my sexuality whenever rainbows are involved, for example, my other friend had made phone cases for a scene in the play (we are all in drama club) and asked her to pick one. One of them had a rainbow design so she was all like "I'm going to pick this one in honor of *insert my name*" then for the next hour was like "do you get it...do you get why I picked it in honor of you" I'm not ashamed of being gay but holy shit I don't need to be reminded every 2 seconds. And if someone says faggot or something she'll start screaming, then be like "OMG we have a GAY person in the room!!!!" While pointing at me, or she *always* has to tell off homophobic people *because of me.* Standing up to homophobes isn't the problem, it's just that I don't like being singled out and othered all the damn time and even if you didn't have a single gay friend you still should be against homophobia...and if something even slightly good happens to the LGBT community she goes way over the top excited (more excited than any community member I've ever met and I've met plenty.) Of course she pins her excitement on me. Tbh I feel like she's gay or bi herself and doesn't accept herself, or her parents are against it, or something and is trying to live it out through me. In which case she sounds like cringey 12-14 year old LGBT emo kid who admins an LGBT Instagram page. A big reason I feel this way is how she behaves towards a mutual friend of ours. Lets call her N. N is an absolute sweetheart, a very likeable, terribly nice girl and I don't think she has a drop of hate inside her but honestly the way she acts towards N is so weird. Like she's developed this creepy Asian fetish after meeting her (N is Japanese) and is constantly hugging and grabbing her, and if anyone else tries to high five her or something she'll get insanely jealous and start death staring you before pulling her away and claiming she belongs to her. Any time she is absent from school we can't mention her name without her wailing at the top of her lungs,"*insert her name* CHAAAAN." Aside from that she acts like an overprotective white suburban mom. It's beyond the friendship thing, and I think N is too nice to say it but she doesn't like it. If she did have a crush on her whatever, but even if you did that's really creepy...if I acted like that to my crushes, I would be considered a predator and get a restraining order put on me. How do I get this girl to chill tf out? (link)
|
I would maybe talk to this girl about how this kind of behavour is actually really offensive. and that you do not need people to mention every 5 minutes about your sexuality. if she is not okay with it then she has to be open with how she is feeling about the situation.
It could be that herself is a gay person and just doesn't know how to express herself in that way. If that is the case she needs to learn to deal with the idea of it instead of proclaiming her expressions through you,
It sounds like this girl has created a fantasy addiction to this girl, in her mind she thinks that these actions will eventually make N like her. and I think she needs to come to the realization that these actions are inappropriate and could potentially be ruining her friendship with N. , but even if you did that's really creepy...
Remember to be super honest and tell her that she needs to just relax and take it easy.
|
Hello, this is kind of an awkward question. So me and my friend are in the 9th grade and we were doing homework in my room and she fell asleep on the bed. But her feet were sticking out, so her feet were on top of the desk and they happened to be right on my notebook. I didn't want to wake her up so I just kept working with her feet in my face lol, but her toes kept wiggling a lot so I got distracted and started playing around with them.
for example I pushed her toes a few times and they would start wiggling by themselves. Then I would hold her toes still to make them stop wiggling. so I did this whenever I wanted her toes to start wiggling lol. Then I turned on the radio to see what happens, and when I pushed her toes they start wiggling to the beat of the song. I thought it was really cute, so I made them follow my voice instructions too, for example I whispered "wiggle faster" while her toes were wiggling, and suddenly they started wiggling faster. and when I whispered "point your toes", she makes the tippy-toes like a ballet dancer. I think she was dreaming about dancing coz we both like to dance :P
Is it a normal thing for me to think her feet are cute, and to play with them this way? I haven't told her about this yet, coz I think it might sound awkward telling her that I kept her toes wiggling like nonstop while she was asleep. Thanx (link)
|
Yes, That is definitely a weird thing to do. I would advise not telling her, because she maybe not so happy about it.
|
|
If you have ever read any of my old questions about someone calling me constantly last year! This is another question I don't remember if it's about the same person from the last or not. Anyways I have this friend who calls me all day every day to talk about the same damn thing . Every time she calls its to talk about her boyfriend or relate everything to her boyfriend so now I avoid her calls because I know what the outcome of the call will be. When she wasn't dating this boyfriend she was calling to talk about how she likes this guy who is now her boyfriend. Before that she used to call me about her ex-boyfriend (who was her boyfriend at the time, she broke up with him in March and started talking about a new boy that same month and started dating her current bf in June) then sometimes she would call to talk behind one of my friends backs and how she flirts with her current boyfriend. I am getting sick of it! I'm tired of talking on the phone with someone who only talks about only one freaking topic and every time I try to change it she relates it back to him. I like texting better cause you can ignore the text and reply when you feel like it but with her if you text her it's an invitation to call me, I'll be out with my family she will call, I'm out with friends she calls, I was at work and she called, I was at the doctors and she called, I went on a school trip in May and she called (my friends on the trip were like "does she usually call you this often?). I was at a job interview and luckily she didn't call during it but she called as I was leaving it, I'm writing this because she just called me 5 mins ago and I'm getting tired of it trust me she will call again in an hour, so basically how can I get her to stop calling me so much? My other friends say she calls them too but not as much as me (link)
| |
First off, you should openly discuss with her how this is making you feel. explain to her that you love talking, but it can not be about one thing. And when she talks about her bf all the time. it's redundant. I would try to openly talk to her about how your feeling, and that you are finding this behavior to be not cool. maybe she needs a face to face confrontation.
|
|
Crystal was my dads girlfriend they were engaged to be married.while they were together i formed a bond with crystal and told her my secert she never told any of mine or asked me to keep a secert before but when my dad and her broke up he told her to not talk to me or my sister she recently got back in touch with me but asked me to keep it between us but i told my aunt because i was feeling torn and needed advice my aunt told my dad he told us both afterward that we can talk as long as we dont talk about him but shes mad at me because he found out (link)
|
There must be a reason that she wanted this to be kept a secret,. It may or may not be for good reasons. Because she is no longer associating with your father i would advise not associating with her either. I believe you created the bond because you were seeing a sense of family orientation but because she is no longer in that family zone, it may not be a good idea.
Hope this helps
*Jasmine
|
So its my friends 21st birthday this weekend except I'm unsure I can go.
Firstly because she is a Uni friend and I am home to celebrate Easter. I don't drive so I would have to rely on my parents to drive me to her birthday (there and back). Something I'd feel bad doing.
Also, the party is at a Shisha bar and I don't smoke Shisha. Another one of my uni friends turned down the friend whose birthday it is, because she said she does not smoke. I have been to this bar before and have felt uncomfortable for not smoking.
However, it is my friends 21st birthday, and I am worried not going will mean she will not come to my celebrations later on in the year.
What do i do? (link)
|
Well there is a few choices for you:
If you do go, you can always take a cab as a form of transportation,. or you can have your parent drive you.
Now about the shisha bar. If you don't want to smoke you ABSOLUTELY Don't have to smoke! You can go, for the social aspect of celebrating your friends birthday. That will ensure that she is wanting to go to your celebrations in the future.
|
|
my best friend hangs out with my other friend like every weekend or everyday and i never realy hang out with her as much anymore and i miss it just being us but then my other friend came along and just starts being her new best friend what do i do :( (link)
|
I would be open and honest with your best friend, and explain to her that you feel like she is replacing you with this new girl. And that it bothers you that your two don't hang out as much as best friend.
Hope this helps :)
Jasmine
|
|
I have a friend, we have been friends since Pre-K. I have always had strong feelings for him, but I never saw him interested in being anything more than friends. Now he claims that he likes a girl in our school and grade but he couldn't tell me who because of 1 thing. So, naturally, I asked him what that 1 thing was and he said he couldn't say. I think his friends know who he likes, but he wouldn't tell me. Finally I pestered him enough and he told me he liked a girl at our school named Lauren Freeman, but I checked the directory and there is no one named Lauren...do you think it's me? Should I tell him I like him after 10 years of friendship? WHAT DO I DO? (link)
|
The best thing to do, would be to talk to him about it. And let him know that you are interested in perusing something more than just friends.
Men are not mind readers, unless we open up to them, and are honest with them they don't have a clue.
yes, It is probably the scariest thing ever, but if it works out that he does like you, and he is just to nervous to push forward, and is making the first step by talking to you about his crush,. then this could be perfect for you, and him to be together.
Thank you,
|
|
Hi, so this girl that I thought was really nice... I just found out she b****ed about me. I thought she was the nicest girl I knew. If people have a problem with me why don't they just tell me or feel the need to tell others? (link)
|
You will find that growing up, Girls can be quite nasty. They back stab, pretend to be your friend and lie. If this girl is your friend I would confront her and ask her what is going on?
If this girl is not a close friend, then I would move on from this friendship,. as anyone who does not treat you with respect does not deserve your time.
Hope this helps :)
|
I have this guy friend, (that i really like but i'll save that for another day) who likes to talk with me about a lot of things. Recently he was talking about my good friend Kristina and how he thought she was moving too fast. Kristina has been hugging him a lot and holding him arm (almost clingy if you get what i mean) and laying her head on his shoulder in church. For my church that's really awkward and jaedon (the guy friend) finds it all too awkward and fast. he also said that he thinks they haven't been talking long enough. So i thought about telling Kristina, but i have never told anyone anything jaedon has said to me privately. They are both my friends and whenever me and him talked before it would always be someone i had no relation to. So i don't want to betray him by telling Kristina what he told me. But i also don't want to see my friend unhappy. What should i do?
Also i like jaedon a lot but i wouldn't want to date someone she likes (especially since so is a drama queen, like she calls this one girl who likes jaedon boyfriend stealer and satan... its bad lmao) (link)
|
Express to J. That he has every right to speak to her about this matter. And that it should be done sooner rather than later. He needs to address to her that he is feeling uncomfortable with her touching and that he is not resdy for that yet.
It is best to not tell your friend K as she will not take it well coming from you and it could turn very ugly. But you should not get in the middle amd be there to support both friends..
|
|
I've been hanging out with this group of people for a while and they're fun to be with but one girl fell out with her previous group of friends, and joined this group of friends but we don't really get along? But the rest of the group are fine with her and she's fine with them, it's just me she doesn't get along with? I used to think she was nice before she began hanging out with this group of friends? (link)
| |
It is normal for not everyone in a group to click. There will be some people you like more in the group. And there will be some you like less in the group. The most important thing is to not let this new girl come between you and the friends in the group. Understand that you have differences but try to be civil when around her. Or try to find something that you both have in common to talk about to forum a friend ship
|
|
I don't know if this is teenage hormones or if I'm generally just someone who gets bored super fast but being bored is getting annoying. At home id rather hangout with "friends" but as soon as I hang out with them I get bored and wish I was home then the cycle continues. Nothing really exciting happens in my life and I never get to travel so I'm always stuck in my small little town. I also feel like I never really fit in with people I wouldn't consider myself antisocial but I get annoyed with the people I know really fast. Nobody really texts me unless they want something and when I text them some of them don't even reply, so I just stopped texting people in general but then I get annoyed and bored because no one texts me and then the cycle continues from there. What can I do to stop getting annoyed and bored so easily? I've tried hobbies but they're just boring, being at home is boring, hanging out with "friends" is boring etc (I put quotation marks because some of my friends are fake and don't know me at all but swear they do and others I feel like I don't belong in their group of friends and just feel like baggage, but even my real friends I get bored with) please help, I'm a 17 year old female that has nothing exciting ever happen to her in her life, never had a boyfriend, first kiss, never had a best friend, when I go to parties I just wanna be at home, when I'm home I wanna be anywhere else but home, I literally also feel like a boring person to be around cause all I really do is go to school, and go home then the cycle continues please help (link)
|
Being bored is completely normal for teenagers. I have been there many times. I find conversations get boring to listen to. But you have to find some way to tune yourself to your friendsm involve more. I Definetly texty friends wsy more than they text me. Here are a few websites that will hopefully help.
:)
http://www.cyh.com/HealthTopics/HealthTopicDetails.aspx?p=243&np=293&id=2723
Http://theadventurouswriter.com/blog/things-to-do-when-youre-bored-boredom-busters/
http://www.thefemininewoman.com/2012/04/what-makes-a-woman-boring-and-how-not-to-be-boring
|
|
How to mek frenz (link)
|
This is a hard one. It always has been in sociability and always will be. First off.. Spell english. 'How to make friends"
Second of all. Depending on if you are a guy/girl. You will be interested in different things. And depending on what grade you are in, you will either have many classes or not alot.
Fact is you have to find people with common interests. Say you heard about a concert some where or an event that is happening in your city. As some of the people around you if they are interested in such event and see if they would like to hang. It's not easy. But it can be an opening to being friends.
|
|
Ok I'm sort of the emo of the school along with a few other kids. I got labeled, I never called myself femo, I just dressed and acted the way I like. So now there is this annoying group of girls trying to get with us. If you look at their Instagrams they keep posting depressing pictures where they insult themselves and write "I'm emo." "I have myself because I'm emo." One girl thinks she's soooo emo because she listens to 5 seconds of summer. She also keeps asking me band names, and says she likes BVB (my favorite band) and apparently has been listening to them "since they formed in the 90's" I mean 1. None of us were BORN in the 90's 2. They released We Stich These Wounds in 2010. I told her that and she said,"oh well I know them." I asked her to name a member other than Andy Beirsack and she said,"well I only care about Andy." The others are doing it for attention. This one girl is actually genuine but she is rreeeaaaalllyyy egotistical with a "more emo than you" meanwhile she doesn't even actually listen to the bands she claims to and just looks up songs to name to seem like she knows what she's talking about. And then there's a stampede of annoying 6th graders (I'm in 7th) who think they know everything. Here's what someone said to me and my friends: "I think I'm emo. I mean I dress like it, I listen to the music, and I'm depressed and hate life and want to die." I mean, seriously, emo is not a mental disorder. And I'm pretty sure cutting off some hair except your side bangs, listening to dashboard confessional because "I saw (*insert emo boy*) who's really hot wearing a t shirt for it" and writing "Die" on your leg with sharpie (no joke I saw it with my own eyes) is emo. Me and my friends hang out with the goths and punks too and they have the same problem. So how do get these annoying idiots to leave us alone? (link)
|
To be honest. You will find this anywhere you go. You are all at the age where you are trying to define yourself by what you look like. what you say. what you wear and maybe these people actual idolize you and want to be like you.
You as being the older one need to talk to these girl/guys and say. I understand you like being these things. But saying you want to die and saying you hate your life is NOT OKAY. You should be happy with what you have. Tell them they are not being themselves by saying you like this person because a hot guy wears their shirt. I mean common.. That's like saying I like Justin Beiber because Some Toddler was singing his song.. FYI.. I HATE JB.. and that sentence does not make sense at all!.
What these girls/guys need to do. is find out what they like. and be real with what they like. not what everyone else likes... I mean if everyone else was having sex would you do it too.. Society is based on themes of who looks like what celebrity.. Marilyn Manson and who looks like bey once. It's better to be yourself. Stand out for who you are.. not trying to be like every single person is out there.
I hope this helps
and if you have anything else you would like help with, Let me know :)
~*Jasmine
|
|
I'm a 14 year old girl and so is my friend. Let's call my friend "Jane". So Jane and I were talking yesterday and she sends me a picture of some cuts on her wrist with the caption "Will these be healed by Thursday? Be honest." She knew that I would know immediately that they were cutting scars because she knows that I struggle with depression, ed, and I use to cut. I told her that they wouldn't be healed by Thursday (there were only three not very deep cuts there, but Thursday is only two days away). Then I said "you really should stop cutting now or it'll turn into a habit. I would know." Then she replied with "this was only my first time and I probably won't do it again because it hurts like hell. And I'll probably just hide my arms under the water at the pool party on Thursday." And then I said "alright, I've gotta go, but be careful and have fun at the party. Oh, and until those cuts heal, wear a bracelet I guess." In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have told her how to hide them but it's over now so nothing I can do but anyway do I still have to tell someone if she doesn't do it again. I'll watch her wrists and thighs and stuff in the locker rooms at school just to be safe, but if no new scars appear and she really is done, do I have to say anything? Btw she struggles with depression occasionally as well. (link)
|
I know what she is going through slightly. I used to have depression and I cut once too. And it did hurt.
I think she may mean it when she says she won't do it again, because it hurts. But you definitely want to look out for her best interest. If you think she may do it again, or if you see signs of cutting again, then it would be a good idea to advice her that it doesn't have to be like this, and cutting is definitely not the answer.
Since she has already told you once, she may try to hide it from you as well. but definitely look for the signs that she might be, as long as she learns from what she did, i think she will be okay.
All the best
|
|
hii..m from india.n 21 year girl.m in deep deep depression.becoz my best frend whom i considerd next to my family.my close frend forgot me.c iz nt crazy any more about me as c waz befor.we used to share every thing..we were in dis very bst frend relationship foir 4 years.bt now itz over.c moved to another city.n made new bestfrend..and i caant tolerate this.feeling lyk dying..m hopeless know.n me crying crying nd crying .cant concentrate on studies.my exam is at the door.bt i caant help myself.i have very few frends.bt dnt dare to ask for suggestions for dis.becoz they will make fun of dis.plz suggest what to do..plz (link)
|
Hey dear. I know exactly how you feel. I have had a couple best friends and it does hurt bad when that friendship ends. I want to promise youthat you will find a new best friend!
Friends tend to come and go. I beleive certain people are in our lives to help us through something or to teach us something for a certain amount of time.
So cheer up deary:) you are an amazing talented young woman. And you have many roads to travel and many new people still to meet. Look to the future with hope :)
|
Ok we'll I'm only 12 and the guy I like is in my class at school so we are in the same classes and I think he considers me as a friend because we're NEVER alone together went we talk or sit together or anything like that and he never writes back if I pass him a note. But right now your probobly thinking that he doesn't like me but somtimes it's like he's sending me mixed signals and its confusing me I mean he does send signals that he likes me and signals that he just wants to be friends and I don't know what I should do like if I should ask him out your tell him I like him or change my appearance on what he complements me on if you know what I mean. But yeah I'm so confused and I'm asking if you can tell me what I should do or say your anything like that. So like I said were both only 12 and me and him are best friends but we only known eatch other for like 3-4 years so yeah /p.s he's older and taller and his name is Keller and he has one of those clueless funny personalitys. And I'm Ashlee and I don't no if I'm clueless or anything but I am considered the class clown in the class but not that popular. AND I KNOW FOR A FAVT NO OTHER PERSON LIKES HIM AND HE'S NOT GOING OUT WITH ANYONE gtg now bye oh and I'm a girl and he's a boy
-Ashlee Lewis (link)
|
First off. Do not change yourself for what you think he may like or want of you. It can be a very challenging horrable experience. I learned the hard way that males will like you for who you are and if the dont they arent worth it.
I would him hints so try holding him longer than a normal hug would usually last. or try flirting with him. holding his hand? giggling and smiling when he says something funny.
or ask him if he wants to go to a movie
|
|
I have a really close friend and we have been friends since kindergarten mayb longer. And she is really nice and all but sometimes she copies me like I get these boots and then she gets them ( btw copying is not Wat irritates me). She also lived in an apartment. But then she moved into this really big house and now she seems to act like she's all that. For example: she barley ever wants to come to my house now, shes always tlking about getting new clothes and she sometimes acts like she's to good for other people. And I just miss how she used to b. how do I tell her tht i don't like when she act like a rich chic without breaking into a fight. And I kno this probably seems stupid but if you knew her you probably wuld understand. Thx 😃 (link)
|
I know exactly how you feel. When some people get 'things' they can turn very matrialistic. Now even though you don't wanna start a fight. You have to be honest with her. Tell her te truth. Explain to her that she is acting very materialistic and that she makes you feel less than a friend. Or/and not good enough to be her friend. Just because someone gets a better/bigger house or gets big moneys and rich does not by any means give them rights to act higher or better than anyone else.
There is a good chance that she will get very offended,. And possibly even angry. Don't be angry with her. Its just her new status talking explain to h that you miss her.
|
|
Hey guys my boy cousin left to camp about 2 weeks ago and he wants me to write him a letter. Like pen pals for the summer. But my summer is so boring now. I dont know what to write. Im sure his letter is going to be full of adventures and mine well I dont even know what mine will say. I dont know should I make it like a scrap book and put pictures? What else should I add? My printer barely has ink... ahhh. I dont know tell me ideas please I rate. :) (link)
| |
You should write how your feeling about your summer. he wants to know about your summer,. so tell him about the cute boys around. or the people he knows what they are doing?
|
|
So the other one of my best friends gave me this troll link. When you click that link, you'll be redirected to a page with this screaming ghost girl and a scary bgm. Obviously I got scared. Afterwards she told me to go troll my other friends and so I did since it sounded fun. Most of my other friends got scared but laughed it off but when I gave the link to my other best friend, HE TOTALLY FLIPPED OUT. Like, I was in Skype call with him so I heard him screaming and throwing something. At first I thought he fainted or something so I called him a few times. Then he told me he just asked his maid to help close the page because he was too scared. Now though, it seems like he actually THREW his headphones to the computer screen and it broke. He told his mum (obviously) and didn't exactly tell her the FULL story. His mum is making me pay $1200 and obviously I'm mad. I said I'd speak to his mum one on one but I won't be too polite about it though. What should I do? And am I really at fault and should pay $1200? I mean, it's not like I threw his headphones at the screen. (link)
|
It was a joke. Period. Maybe not a nice joke. But a joke. You should not have to pay for a computer screen that you did not break. He threw the head phones at the screen not you;..
It's like someone sending an email that they didnt like and breaking the screen not to see it.
He is at fault for breaking it. not you..
Tell your parents. that you did not break it. he did.
|
I've posted an earlier question about being annoyed with the neighbour's kids because they keep coming over, and staying over at my house, and entering without knocking or anything.
Everyone has advised me earlier to speak to the parents, but I am extremely shy and I feel bad having to speak to the parents because I feel I shouldn't have to because 1) it might create animosity 2) i feel absolutely terrible
Just literally less than 5 minutes ago. I've had another experience that has me extremely annoyed. (link)
|
Try keeping your doors locked, that way the child will not be able to run through out your house. and you will be allowed the privacy that you deserve..
But at the same time. this child SHOULD NOT be doing this. If she ran into the wrong house. it could be very dangerous to the child's safety.
This is how i would word it;
"Mrs. Smith. I understand that your child likes to come over to hang out. But there has to be boundaries. It is very unacceptable for her/him to come into the house and run around and barge into my room un anounced. I feel violated. when i don't even know your child is in my house. and I feel that it is my house and i should not have to worry who is in my house with out me knowing."
Hope this helps hon!
Jasmine
|
|
