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My friend cuts herself
I'm a 14 year old girl and so is my friend. Let's call my friend "Jane". So Jane and I were talking yesterday and she sends me a picture of some cuts on her wrist with the caption "Will these be healed by Thursday? Be honest." She knew that I would know immediately that they were cutting scars because she knows that I struggle with depression, ed, and I use to cut. I told her that they wouldn't be healed by Thursday (there were only three not very deep cuts there, but Thursday is only two days away). Then I said "you really should stop cutting now or it'll turn into a habit. I would know." Then she replied with "this was only my first time and I probably won't do it again because it hurts like hell. And I'll probably just hide my arms under the water at the pool party on Thursday." And then I said "alright, I've gotta go, but be careful and have fun at the party. Oh, and until those cuts heal, wear a bracelet I guess." In hindsight, I probably shouldn't have told her how to hide them but it's over now so nothing I can do but anyway do I still have to tell someone if she doesn't do it again. I'll watch her wrists and thighs and stuff in the locker rooms at school just to be safe, but if no new scars appear and she really is done, do I have to say anything? Btw she struggles with depression occasionally as well.
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You aren't doing her and yourself any favors. Remember what you were taught earlier in life about icky situations and telling an adult.
You know that she is NOT in a good place mentally if she's doing this and that he depression is NOT in control. It could be dangerous to hide this information and affect her mental-health.
As hard as it is you need to tell her that you want to help her and that right now you can see she isn't well. Let her know that it may seem hard to tell adults but she needs to and they will help so this never plagues her again. Her psychiatrist must know about this.
It's wrong to let her hide it even if she gets angry. I think you should tell your parents what happened and seek their advice or seek the advice of a teacher or counselor or tell this friend that I "need you to tell someone and I'll go with you but it must be done. You're not well and headed for big trouble by continuing to hide."
Also, you know from experience that this isn't "the first time" she's done this. You can't keep looking in the gym shower for cuts as that's a huge burden and you know that there is secrets you can't keep. This is one of them. Nobody said it was easy but you know the right thing.
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I know what she is going through slightly. I used to have depression and I cut once too. And it did hurt.
I think she may mean it when she says she won't do it again, because it hurts. But you definitely want to look out for her best interest. If you think she may do it again, or if you see signs of cutting again, then it would be a good idea to advice her that it doesn't have to be like this, and cutting is definitely not the answer.
Since she has already told you once, she may try to hide it from you as well. but definitely look for the signs that she might be, as long as she learns from what she did, i think she will be okay.
All the best<3
*Jasmine
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