I am a prima-donna pig who is destined for stardom. I am the star of the Muppet Show, a dramatic actress, a great singer, a model and also an advice columnist! Get advice from your favourite Muppet here.
Gender: Female
Location: Hog Springs, Iowa
Occupation: Advice Columnist, Star of the Muppet Show, Dramatic Actress, Great Singer
Member Since: May 19, 2014
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Last Update: July 17, 2016
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Matt
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I just found out I am 8 weeks pregnant with my (ex?) boyfriends baby. We both wanted to save ourselves for marriage and then we took it too far. That is why we decided to take a break. I am going to be a senior in high school and he is going to be a freshman in college. He doesn't really talk to me anymore, but his mom and I are still really close. How should I go about telling him I am expecting his child? (link)
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First of all, seek legal consultation. While you may want to do this simply without lawyers, the fact is you have already said that your ex is not very responsible. It sounds like you want to give your ex a bit of slack in this situation, but you are now a mother. You have to think of your child's best interests first. That means you have to have a legally binding contract which states that you get custody and that your ex owes you child support. Without this, your child will not have the financial support it deserves. Moreover, your ex could take you to court for custody later, which would be extremely complicated. Better to get the legalities out of the way first. Seek legal consultation before speaking to your ex. I'm not saying you should take him to court before talking to him, though. Just go for a consultation before talking to him to make sure that you have all your ducks in a row.
In terms of how to tell your ex that you are expecting, the best thing to do would be to ask him to meet you for coffee or for dinner and break the news there. Tell him you have something important to tell him. Then just say it. It is what it is, he is responsible for his reaction, not you. Let him know you are keeping the baby. Tell him what you expect of him in this situation. Let him know that while you do not expect him to be a perfect father, you would like him to be in the child's life.lso, do not be shy to tell him what you need from him financially. He may not be a very responsible person at this stage of his life, but it is time for him to grow up now. Regardless of his maturity level, he is obligated to provide the child with child support. Then, tell him that you have saught legal consultation and tell him what your lawyer's recommended course of action is. Be open and friendly so that he knows you did not seek out a lawyer for any negative reason, only to get the court's opinion on what would be a fair amount for child support, custody, etc. Try to work together.
If your ex freaks out or does not cooperate in a co-parenting plan, you need to take him to court. This is about your child's best interests, not his moood.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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A lot of things have happened over the past year. I've had a lot of up's and down's. My ex boyfriend of three years cheated on me, hence ex-boyfriend. Its funny how things happen. I never thought that I would get cheated on. I guess I fell off my high horse. It hurts to know that the person you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with would betray you in such a manner. In results to the infidelity, I decided to move on. I gave it my all! I did everything in my power to save my relationship but I couldn't do it alone. I've always had insecurity problems and this situation made me feel worse about myself. I released my anger in the wrong way. In order to move on, I decided to get with another person. I've always found this person attractive. I felt honored to have his attention. I felt like it wasn't the time for me to move on but I needed to, for myself, in order to distract myself from the pain I was feeling inside. I felt like there was a better person out there that wanted me. It was another chance. I never really let go of my feelings for my ex. He was my first love. Now i've run into a dilemma. My ex has promised that he would change. Even though he has lied to me countless of times about other situations and etc; I feel like I can trust and believe his words. But I feel like I can never look at him the same. Every time that I see his face, all these negative thoughts arise. But he makes me feel loved. I see a real future with him because that's all I thought about in the past. Once you know what love is, its hard to let it go. Now that I'm single, I'm wishing to be in a relationship with him. I see so many couples happy and it reminds me of how it used to be. Yes we argued but what couple doesn't. With the current guy that i'm "talking" to, I find myself comparing what I used to have with my ex. And everything that he doesn't do, I question. I feel like, he's not doing what he's supposed to do. I know that everyone's different but it feels weird. I yearn for this love that I'm not receiving from him. It pushes me to want to go back to the past because I'm comfortable with that. I'm forcing myself to feel love and affection. I'm pushing the current guy to give me more than he's willing too. He tells me to be patient and i'm very understanding about his feelings but it puts me in a tough spot. I'm left with a man who is willing to fix everything he ever had with me and love me more than ever. Which comes with a risk of getting cheated on again, reoccurring arguments about the past and possibly having more trust issues. OR being with a guy who doesn't want a relationship at the moment, who wants everything to be his way, calls upon me when he feel its convenient for him and etc. I want to try something new but I don't want to let go of the past. I'm scared to move on because I don't know what the future will entail with this person. I'm scared of going to the past a losing a possible future with the person i'm talking to now. The guy said "be patient" but will this patience be worth the wait or will I be making a big mistake? What should I do? I am lost? I am sad? I am scared!
Who do I pick? What do I do? (link)
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You are in a situation where none of the options are all that good, just mediocre. Waiting for the new guy and being "patient" is not the answer. Even though there is likely something you are gaining from his company, he sounds selfish. That being said, getting back with your ex is also not the answer. Even though that relationship sounds like the one that was most special to you, it sounds like your ex has some problems that (let's be honest) will end up screwing you over in the end. I understand why you are sad and scared. It's good that you are in touch with those feelings. Listen to them! Pick neither! If you want to experiment a little with each relationship, go ahead. But, I think you know in your heart that neither guy is quite right for you.
Even though neither guy is quite right for you, you can experiement with dating one or the other. Just be aware that every moment you spend with these two is a moment that could be spent finding someone better. So, being with one of these guys is kind of like choosing to focus on short term happiness instead of focusing on finding the one.
Also, if you do choose to focus on short term happiness instead of on finding the one and date one of these guys, try to be as selfish about it as possible. Ask for what you want, get them to pay, break their arms and legs if they hurt you. Make it about what YOU want, because neither of these relationships seem to have true, long-term potential.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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Hi guys, I've been with my boyfriend for a little more than three months now. He's very great to me and I love being with him. I know love is different to everyone but this is my first real relationship and I've constantly been thinking about what love is, how it feels, when it's time to say it, etc. I know for a fact that I've never been in love before and I don't think I'm in love now. I was just curious to ask everyone how and when they knew that they were in love with their significant other. Did it kind of just hit you? Was it a gradual progression? Was it love at first sight? Is there even love at first sight? When is too soon to say I love you? I'm not looking for you to tell me how it should be for me, I want experience and how it was for you personally.
Like I said, he's a very great guy. I spent the entire day with him the other day because my family went away and I hate being alone so he made us my favorite dinner, even though I know he doesn't love it very much, he made it and ate it because he knows I love it. He knows I get anxious driving long distances and even though he hates long drives, he always drives us both when we go away with friends and sometimes I just look at him when he's driving us around and he'll look over and we'll just smile at each other. Or even when we're just watching our show on Netflix, I'll notice him not watching the show and he'll just be looking at me and then he'll always smirk when I ask what as he looks away and says "oh, nothing". Last week I turned 21 and I drank way, way, way more than I anticipated-he drove me back to his place and let me stay at his house that night and he even called off work the next day to be with me as I suffered through my hangover. He's not a virgin but I am so he isn't pushing it at all. He said he's leaving it all up to me, he's ready when I'm ready. Now, I know what you're thinking, he seems clingy. But it really isn't that way. I only name the times that we're together but really we can only hang out for a couple hours a night after I finish class and he finishes work at 11pm (four days in a row of 12 hour shifts, just for reference on how busy he usually is). Other times, when he's off from work, we each do our own thing. We have a good system and it works pretty well for us.
From my copious amounts of mentioning how great he is, it's pretty evident that I do really like him a lot and I guess it shows that he returns the feelings. I'm really just pretty curious how I'll know when the flip switches and it's so much more?
Thanks for any input! (link)
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It is all three. It is love at first sight, a gradual progression and it hits you like lightning. Let me explain. I have fallen in love twice, and both times I experienced these three phases. The first frog I fell in love with wasn't Kermit. It was a frog named George. George my best friend. The love at first sight part happened at the beginning of our friendship. But, I didn't think of it as love at first sight, even though looking back, it was. I just thought "Wow, this guy is special, I want him in my life". Then I made that happen. I spent time with him and we became best friends. That was the gradual progression part. Then came the lightning. And let me tell you, the lightning part is actually painful. It is the part where you realize that you are no longer in control of your life. The other person owns a part of your heart. And if that other person isn't perfect, the feeling is scary and can move you to tears. With George, I realized my feelings for him went beyond friendship one day when he lied to me. He told me he would take me to a movie, but it turned out I was busy that day and he took a different pig behind my back. I cried and cried when I found out. I then wondered, why am I crying over a movie? Then it hit me, like lightning. We were not just friends. I was in love. The second time I fell in love, it was with Kermit,who became my life partner and husband. I met him at a watering hole where I stepped on his foot. I looked up and saw a charming frog. I thought "I have to get to know him better" (love at first sight). We then dated for a year (gradual progression). Then came the painful lightning. A year into our relationship, Kermit had a horrible habit of cancelling our dates last minute if he had something else he wanted to do, like hang with the frogs. I became very angry at him for doing this one day it was the first time I yelled at him at the top of my lungs. This anger made me realize that I was feeling very attached. I burst into tears, realizing that I was in love with him, and that there was nothing I could do about it. I then began swearing at him, calling him every name in the book because I was scared of the intensity of my own feelings.
It sounds like you have had the love at first sight part (wow, he's special) and that you are in the middle of the gradual progression. The lightning will come. There will be a moment when you realize that you don't just like to be with him, you need to be with him and your life will never be the same again. I recommend you don't say you love him until this moment happens, until you can literally feel that your hearts are connected. If you say it without feeling it to the core of your being, it is meaningless.
Love is a human feeling (as well as a pig and frog feeling), which means it isn't a happy feeling. It is a painful, exciting, terrifying, powerful and angry feeling that leaves you weak and yet oddly comfortable at the same time.
It changes who you are and your life is never the same again.
Believe moi. Moi has a charm that is lethal to men,
Miss Piggy
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I'm in a long distant relationship. I met a girl who is also in a long distant relationship. We were honest with each other about our relationship status. I thought she was ready for us to be friends with benefit until she won't let me have sex with her the day she slept in my place, sleeping on the sofa in the lounge and insisting I go sleep in the bedroom. I cut things off of her. She keeps texting asking why I cut off. I told her I find her attractive and want us to be friends with benefit. She says she doesnt want that. And that she doenst find me attractive. I keep cutting her off but she keeps texting me. Came around once, keeps feeling at home, eats my food, even once asked me to buy her groceries. I feel like she's just a gold digger. I cut off again but she keeps asking why I am avoiding her. Is she playing hard to get? Or is she really a gold digger hoping I will keep tolerating her with the hope that I will eventually get some? I am male, working class. She's a student. (link)
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I think she is a gold digger.
After all, diamonds are a sow's best friend.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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Okay so like me and my high school ex boyfriend are seeing each other on once or twice on a monthly basis since april 2014 ntil now august 2015 but before that we broke up twice and then startd speaking last year..Wen we together everything is so perfect i could see that he changed from how he use to be when we dated coz now he would be more of a boyfriend type,cuddling,holding my hand,gets excited to see me etc to speaking to each other almost everyday whole day eventhough we are just friends,he kept on hinting bout wanting a baby or asking me when am i gettin married or telling me that im showing of his property cause im wearing tight tops and yes we do have sex he would always say things like i can get attached to him or i can use hm for sex and he will save me if i had to die bt he wil die instead and he cand he can show me the world and i use to tell hm about all the guys who liked me or had a thing with and then he would gve me advice or tell me i should wear alot of clothes so they cant see anythng and he would tell me bout the girls who likes him and who he kisses...but now all of a sudden this month (august) it feels as if things have change like me drifting coz we went from speaking to each other everday to hardly ever speaking or just sometimes,and when me do chat he dont reply to me,bt he gets and reads the msgs and then replies whenever,i saw him saterday 22aug and i could see by his actions that he missed me as much as i missed him..i then send hm a few msgs to say thank you for the nice night but he ddnt respond and he always use to afta i saw him,i then send hm another few msgs and then he told me "such a tripper you are" yesterday i send hm msgs bt he ddnt reply again and then this morning i send hm a msg and then he's response was "Why so lastag lately" and then i just said sorry for being being so lastag and bothering you nd he mst enjoy his day,dont thnk he will reply anytime soon...a few weeks before i saw hm he just went missing in action well he was online and stuf just neva spoke to me and when i askd hm whats wrong he said he just feels like being alone lately and then we started speaking again almost everyday and then i saw him saterday and when i did it was nice as always cause i told him i miss him and then he randomly asked what im doing his thinking bout going home but thought about the woman who misses hm if i feel like seeing him so i said yes and then he fetch me.told me i dont love him anymore cause i dont greet or give him a hug..neither of us has moved on yet i asked hm if hes gna tell me if he has a gf one day and jhen he said probably yes but he dont think he will feel anythng for anyone anymore and he sometimes bring up old memories of us or ask questions like how do i think we would turn out if we had to meet for the 1st time or whats my favourite part bout wen 2gther or having sex cause to him the first kiss is always the best he asked me what do i want in a guy and then i tld hm i want some1 who knws what they want and do smallthngs like go to tha beach or park and then he told me he knws what he want and kissed me and the following week we went to the park..he even asks me if i can go shopPing for hm cause he dont have time and stuf...im so scared of losing him eventhough we not yet official,i love him so much if he dnt hear from me for a while eventhou i keep on sending him msgs he would randomly send a msg and ask if im still alive...but this month i dont knw why the sudden change why he dont wana speak to me anymore or reply to my msgs i miss him and i miss speaking to hm like we use to..my friends told me to let him go,just back off and if he cares he will show up again..its so hard not speaking to him i really dont know what to do i really dont cause i dont want to lose hm..it been a year and four months that we spending time together and we jst friends but wen we 2gther its like we are meant to be and to think we broke up twice before that ..do you think that therz a possibility he got tired of me or that he moved on and dont want to tell me..he has never lied to me before and when he hangout with his friends he would tell me cause the friday he told me he was with family and saterday before i saw hm he said he was suppose to do somethng with hs dad but hs not goin his rather going to chill smoke weed and play facebook poker and then i saw him the night and we smoked 2gther...i really ddnt mean to b a nuicense and bother him bt nw he alreadi thinks that i am..what do i do,i cnt eat or sleep..i dont wana loose him oot again..just dnt understand why the sudden change this month..why is he acting so,what do you think? The nli girl hs been seeing is me did he move on mayb! Did he get bored of me? If he wantd space why didnt he tell me" why dont he wana reply to my msgs and only does it weneva? Should i back of for a while and wait till he shows up and then wen i see him i should talk to him about it cause when he dropped me at home he said see you next time so im hoping that thers gona b a next time..I realy ddnt meant to bother hm and be lastag just wntd to speak to hm..mayb its my own fault or may im just tripping..need advice on what to that..what do u think bout this situation
Please help me why might he be acting so this month (link)
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First let me say this: NEVER stop eating or sleeping over a frog. Eating is one of the most important activities a sow can partake in. And we all need our beauty rest.
Second, yes he is probably bored of you because you didn't challenge him! You slept with him without even being in a relationship. That is called being easy. It sounds like he is likely avoiding you because he has met someone else. You can't have sex with someone "unofficially" and expect it to last. This is a common mistake that many sows make. But, it's important to realize that if you have sex outside of a relationship, you are basically telling the frog that you don't need a relationship. Based on what I am reading, you do want a relationship. This means you have not been fully honest with this guy, because you have been giving him the impression that you are fine with sex outside of a relationship when in fact you want a relationship. Start being honest now. Tell him you want to date. See where it goes.
In all honesty, I doubt he will agree to date you after all this time, but you never know. It sounds like you have held him to such low standards for so long that he will probably not know how to step up to the plate and actually have a relationship. But, if you don't ask you'll never know. And more importantly, if and when he rejects you, you can finally move on with your life and get a real relationship. Oh and next time, remember that sex comes AFTER you are official.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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I'm a guy, 41 (although most people think I'm in my late 20s) in a long distance relationship with a girl, 30, whom I've known for about 10 years, dated on and off, as she had broken up with me like twice previously due to the distance, and had apologized and I took her back in both instances. We got engaged early this year and planning to get married before the end of this year. She says she loves me but she has said in a number of occasions that she doesn't care if I'm having a fling with other girls because she has better things to worry about. I find this strange. Should I be worried that she might just more in love with the idea of marriage than she is in love with me? In my society (Africa, Nigeria) a lot of importance is placed on marriage, with lots of people (especially women) being very desperate about marriage. They get even more desperate when they approach 30 years old. Or could she just be bluffing? In my society, the girls do that a lot, play hard to get all the time, even when you're already dating them. In fact, my girlfriend sometimes plays hard to get for me each time we're about to have sex. She never initiates sex. I always do. And this is typical with the girls around here. (link)
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Not every woman is equally bothered by cheating, just like not every man is equally interested in cheating. That being said, she could be desperate, or bluffing. It's hard to say at this point. Maybe look her in the face and ask her these questions.
Regardless of her answer, I suggest you don't see other women. There is too much potential for problems and miscommunication here.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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I will take anyones opinion im in a 5 year commited relationship with my boyfriend i love him but i dint feel like its the same as before i feel like if i balance the good and the bad the bad definitely outweighs the good thing about our relationship im 21 hes 28 i work he doesnt i maintain everything in our home all the bills are paid by me when i come i also have to do all the house chores or they wont get done im exhausted i cant gi anywhere with my friends without it being a problem so i just stay home and me and him do anything outside our home ever. And now on top of things im crushing on a girl i met at work a few months ago currently we are friends but when we just met there was alot of flirting going on in the beginning she let me know that she didnt want to let things grow with me because she knows i wont leave my boyfriend but now that she stopped seeing me and treating me as she did before now i miss her what should i do.. (link)
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I am a firm believer that people should leave relationships because they are unhappy, not because someone else entered the picture. As a result of this belief, I will ignore the part of your question about the girl who flirted with you. You are currently in a relationship and should not be thinking about other people.
As for your relationship, it sounds awful. He sounds like a lazy frog. Tell him you feel sad because all of the responsibilities up to you. Tell him what you need him to do to contribute. Give it a few months to see if he changes. If not, it's time to leave.
Believe moi, moi has a charm that is lethal to men.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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Ok, so my good friend has this HUGEEEEE crush on this boy, and she's had it ever since they met, which was pre school, (we're in middle school now). And just a couple months ago we were all hanging out when BOOM! I started to have a crush on him, too. No way am I telling my friend, she would never talk to me and literally kill me. Please help me! Please give me answers as to what I should do! What if he asks me out?!!?!?!?! HELP! (link)
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If your friendship is important to you, there are some steps you need to take.
#1 Consider why you like this guy. I have seen it time and time again that somebody goes after their friend's crush because they are jealous of people being interested in their friend, jealous of their friend spending time with their crush instead of them, jealous of their friend getting male attention, etc. If you are attracted to him because you think he "wants you more" or something to that effect, don't go for him. If this is all about proving to yourself that you are desirable, it's not worth risking a friendship over. Get your ego in check and stop talking to her crush.
#2 If you decide it is not about being the one he likes "more", but instead that it is because he is the guy you are closest to at this time, the guy you feel most comfortable around etc. then it seems fair that you would want to explore where this could go. Be honest and tell your friend what is on your mind. If this is really about him and not about you being the one that he "prefers" then you have nothing to hide.
#3 Soothe your friend. Your friend will probably be angry when you tell her. And, she probably has a right to be angry because you know how long she has liked him and this may make her feel like you are not a good friend. You need to accept her feelings if she is angry. Don't argue with her or tell her she should feel differently. Everyone is entitled to their feelings.
#4 Tell her that your friendship means a lot to you and that you would like to stay friends through this. Also, in order to be fair you need to tell her that if he asks her out, you will be fine with her saying yes as well.
#5 Come to an agreement that once he asks one of you out, the other one will stop talking to him completely. It's one thing to fight over a crush, but it's quite another to be fighting over a boyfriend. If this really is about developing a relationship with him, you won't want him hanging around her when you two start dating. It will also be less painful for her that way. And vice versa; if he picks her, you won't want to be around for that. (And if you still do want to be around him if he picks her, that shows it's more about wanting to be "preferred" rather than about the actual relationship).
#6 Come to the agreement that you won't aggressively go after him in front of each other. Again, if this isn't a competition, why rub each other's faces in this?
If these steps don't make sense, it's likely because this is actually about your own ego and wanting to be more likeable than your friend as opposed to wanting to develop a relationship without hurting your friend.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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Hello,
So I met a guy at my internship that i got for the summer and we really hit it off. We have been hanging out a lot and becae really good friends. We have started having sex but nothing about our relationship status has been declared.
In a couple weeks we are both moving back home, which is about 6.5 hours away from each other. I really like him and would like to make it work so that if we were to start dating we could stay together and see each other as much as possible.
Before a couple days ago he hasn't really said much about going home but the other day he brought up how close we are to the end of summer, i asked if he was happy to be going home and he said will be sad he doesn't get to see me. Some of his friends have came up and visited them and he took me to meet them and introduced me.
I'm not really sure where his heads at and I really dont want to say anything about our situation until we leave because if the conversation goes badly I still will have to see him at work everyday until the end of summer.
So do you guys think that I should wait for him to bring it up? Do you think he'll even bring it up at all? Or should I bring it up? and if yes, what should I say to him?
Thank you in advance
(link)
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You go through the entire summer with this casual sexual relationship, and now that he is leaving town you want to surprise him by asking him for commitment as he is leaving? This sounds badly thought out.
Having sex before a relationship is declared when you are looking for a relationship is a fail. It sends the message that you are a casual person who does not care to work on the emotional side of a relationship.
Don't get me wrong, I understand how your thought process probably went. You probably started out feeling pretty casual towards him and then feelings developed which you did not expect. I get it.
BUT DO NOT EVER PUT YOURSELF IN THIS SITUATION AGAIN.
If there is even a slight chance that you will want a relationship with someone, you should solidify the relationship before having sex, otherwise you are creating problems for yourself.
Before you have had sex, the frog in question will be putting effort in to get your attention. This is the time to start dating: when the frog is trying to impress you.
When you do it in the reverse order and have sex first, it will always be an uphill battle to develop a relationship because the frog will have already achieved his goal with you and will be less motivated to put emotional effort in.
t's one of men and frogdom's all-time idiotic offenses. You give him the pleasure of your company (plus untold hours of prep time) and in return he does not bother to commit to anything unless it is spelled out for him.
As of right now, having sex outside of a relationship has sent the message that he can have physical access to your body without any commitment. You have made sex too easy, so he won't be motivated to ask you out. This is why you have to be the one to bring up dating. He will not bring it up because you have already slept with him.
Learn from the situation you are in. Do not put yourself in this awkward situation ever again.
All of that said, I'm sure this frog does have genuine feelings for you. It sounds as though you two have connected and shared a nice summer together.
This is why this conversation absolutely cannot wait until the end of the summer when you both go your separate ways. You have been sending him the false message that you are okay with sleeping with him without a commitment. This needs to be corrected immediately. He deserves to know what is on your mind. Moreover, you deserve a friendship with him that is open and honest, whether that turns into a dating relationship or not. Don't cheat yourself the opportunity to ask for what you need just because you are afraid of rejection.
The next thing to discuss is how to bring it up. I suggest you bring it up by refusing to have sex with him the next time he tries to be intimate with you. When he asks why you don't want to have sex anymore, tell him you do not want to have sex with him anymore unless it is within the context of a relationship because you really like him and want to take your friendship to the next level.
If you do this, it will communicate to him that sex needs to come with a relationship for you. He will likely make the emotional effort if you demonstrate that it is something you need.
If you do follow my advice, I am virtually certain he will agree to date. If he says no, it would probably be because he doesn't want to do long distance; I can't picture him rejecting you personally considering what you have written.
WHAT VOUS NEED TO DO: The best defense is a good offense, which means that you must never give up trying to make him commit. Remember: Never stop being offensive.
Good luck, and tell moi how it goes,
Miss Piggy
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I really cannot understand myself, and why I keep doing things I regret.
I am in relationship with an amazing man, and I am ready to commit for life...
really, he is amazing and we are really great together.
And I just cant understand why when on occasion I go out to clubs without him, I tend to just go with what others are doing.. and I end up doing things that I know my boyfriend wouldnt like and I am so ashamed of it.
(Ive never really properly cheated,
but Ive let guys hold me and stuff and I dont think its ok, so maybe it does count as cheating??)
I am bad at saying no, not because I want anyone else or really want to do these things..
but more because I'm not quite sure at the time if it is ok or not.
And Im stupid and oblivious.. I tend to trust
others when I shouldnt.
I really want to be someone my man can trust, and who I can trust. I never want to let him down.
I am disgusted with myself for my lack of backbone and assertiveness,
and I really wish none of this has ever happened. And every time it does, I feel terrible :(
Can someone tell me whats wrong with me?? And how I can fix it?? (link)
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The clubbing scene isn't very supportive of relationships. The whole concept is that strangers drink, dance and get close. Not exactly the best place for a person in a committed relationship to be. Oh and don't even get me started on the fact that it is somehow considered socially acceptable for guys to approach girls at clubs and EXPECT dancing, grinding, etc. Saying no is considered socially awkward. Saying no anyway takes a lot of effort.
That being said, cut yourself some slack. If you go out clubbing alone and dance with other people, your boyfriend probably does too. Maybe try having an honest conversation about this and see how the two of you feel. Maybe it will make more sense for the two of you to stop going clubbing separately, or maybe you can meet up after times that you do go clubbing separately to talk and re-connect so that you know that whatever happens at the club is not as important as what happens at home with each other.
For me, when I go out clubbing, I karate chop any frog that comes within 10 meters of me and any pig that comes with 100 meters of my Kermie. So that's my other piece of advice: take up karate.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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I'm a 13 year old girl and this is my question. Okay, so there is this guy that I knew in grade 6. I liked him and surprisingly, he liked me back. So, we dated for 6 months, but even though I was little, immature and didn't know that much about relationships, I thought that I really liked him. That was the problem. I LIKED him, not LOVED him. When we texted, he would say "I love you" but I would reply as "I like you". I felt weird saying love, but it wasn't a omg-i-feel-so-embarrassed feeling. More of a awkward, unusual feeling. Later on, he moved schools and he couldn't come and see me any more. I slowly moved away and decided to break up. I actually gave it a lot of thought and that was my final decision. Now, this guy has a twin brother. Let's call him... Max. Now I talked to Max a LOT and I wasn't going to ruin our friendship just because I broke up with his brother. We skyped a lot, played games together online, etc. I felt annoyed when 'Max' didn't reply to my messages in a hour. When I checked my messages and it turned out to someone else that messaged me instead of Max, I'd get disappointed. This was the first time this happened to me and this didn't even happen when I was dating. I'm not sure if the feeling is LIKE as a friend, or LIKE as a boyfriend. I'm not sure about my feelings, let alone tell them to him. I don't know. Next year, I'm going to the same school as them too. He told me about his brother's first girlfriend and his ( turns out their girlfriends were both best friends ) when I was dating Max's brother. Was it to make me jealous? Does it mean I'm friendzoned because he is telling me because he is comfortable around me? Am I just being stupid? Was he showing off? I guess, when we both went to the same school, I made more physical contact with Max than my boyfriend. Some older kids would tell me that my boyfriend was jealous of Max. WHAT DO I DO???
Please help, I'm confused.
PS. An extra question, pretty important.
Do I have feelings(?) for him because he looks like my ex/his brother? (link)
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You like him. He probably likes you back.
As far as him talking about that other girl, I doubt he was trying to make you jealous. Guys don't tend to play those sorts of games. But, it is possible that he was trying to show off that people like him.
Let me give you another tip:the "friendzone" is not real. People who are friends often end up dating. Being friends first is one of the best ways to start a relationship.
When people say they have been "friendzoned" what they really mean is "I have been rejected and the person let me down easy by calling me their friend".
You are not stupid. You are thirteen. You have time to figure these things out. You are young. Take your time and enjoy the process of first loves.
Tell Max you have feelings for him.
Oh and about him looking like his brother: that probably does play a part in you liking him. That's not necessarily a bad thing, though. Just be aware of it.
Oh and Merry Christmas!
Here is a video for you:
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Miss+Piggy+Santa+Baby
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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14/f. There are 2 guys, A and B. I have liked guy A for a really long time and have a strong liking for him. I have only liked guy B for a short amount of time and I don't really like him that much. One of my friends told them both that I like them but she told A that I like B more. Now I don't know if A likes me because he thinks I like B more then him. I just want to date A because we would be so cute! I don't know what to do because I think B is going to ask me out and idk if I want to say yes because I don't want to give up on A. Please help!!!!! (link)
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Tell A you like him. Turn B down.
And here is a Merry Christmas greeting from Moi!
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Miss+Piggy+Santa
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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Okay... I'm a fourteen year old girl and I like a boy that's four years older than I am. We go to the same school, and share the same interests and friends. We all play Magic: The Gathering at lunch and are on academic team and nerd stuff. The guy, Daniel, and I text often. Like, every night. Usually while simultaneously playing Nethack. He makes me laugh and is really funny and smart and nice. Whenever I think of him, I always think of him smiling and joking. He's ridiculously polite and occasionally speaks in a manner that makes me wonder whether he's from the eighteenth century, and there's always depth to his comments. I see him sometimes looking at me when I'm talking to someone else, and he always invites me to sit with him whenever he's going to do something with someone else, and he and I walk to the library together often, and text together until midnight at the least because neither of us ever sleep at a reasonable time. Um... he lets me lean against him whenever I'm watching him play a game, but he seems to make a slightly bigger deal out of touching me than of touching anyone else. Do you think he likes me? What things would I look for to know if he does? (link)
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Where are you from? Depending on the part of the world you live in, a relationship between a fourteen year old and an eighteen year old may be illegal. He might like you, but if you are below the age of consent in your area and he is above the age of consent, steer clear of this guy. I know you might be thinking "Oh this relationship won't become sexual anyway", but trust me, you may change your mind about that in time if you do date him and fall in love. Don't put yourself in that position. Do your research and find out if that relationship is legal. If it is, I suggest telling him you are interested in him because he probably feels the same way back. If it isn't legal, keep away from him. You don't want to put yourself in danger or get him in trouble.
And now for some nice holiday fun:
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=Miss+Piggy+Santa
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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Ok so I have became and extremely needy girl towards the guy I love we have only been a thing for like 4 months in the beginning everything was good then i took things way too serious i text him all the time and always ask him if we can hang out... he knows he has me whenever he wants so he takes advantage of it..if i back off and stop texting him and let him make the moves will this keep him more intersted? (link)
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Believe moi, all relationships go through this phase. You need to figure out what compromises you two can make for your relationship. Some people need more space than others. I personally need less space and my frog needs more space, so I understand how you are feeling. It sucks to be the person who needs less space because it makes you feel needy! But don't worry, you are not needy, you are just a person who likes to socialize more than your boyfriend does. Also, if he doesn't want to see you as much as you want to see him, you might begin to feel as though he doesn't care about you as much as you care about him. But, don't worry, he's probably just a person who likes his space.
Talk to to your boyfriend about how much space he needs. Ask him how often he would like to hangout, talk, text, etc. Listen to the answer. Then come to a compromise. If you want to see him every day, but he wants to see you every week, try to see each other a couple of times a week. If you like texting all the time, but he doesn't try to send each other a good morning/good night text and then cool it during the day.
Compromises like this are very important to a good relationship.
Don't invade his space. Likewise, he needs to be more attentive to your need for contact.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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Should I let my wife have a threesome with another man (link)
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Not if you are asking the question.
Make sure you are 100% comfortable before you say yes to anything like that.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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He has a baby on the way by a girl he got pregnant before we set boundaries and he has had money issues and i helped im with him every night and im happy but i just feel,for myself, i need that commitment especially before the child gets here to feel that security and have that commitment..i deal with a lot dating him and this situation and i feel i deserve at least that...but i dont want to feel im forcing anyone to "be" with me..although im always with him, his family knows about me, etc...do i wait it out or stand my grounds about having his all or nothing...
(link)
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Stand your ground. Have a conversation with him about commitment. Don't let him string you along.
Toodle-oo,
Miss Piggy
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Hi.I am in a relationship with my guy for almost 9 months.We have our ups and downs but now adays , we've been having our downs only.It's like , we had sex 4 months ago and now , we just don't have a place where we can have it.I am absolutely okay with it , but he's all horny and devastated.We've been having so much fights lately.It's just so bad!I just love him so much and he does too.We end up leaving each other after every fight but we get back together and have a fight all over again.I cannot live without him.I try to fix the fights and they do get fixed but we have a fight all over again.I don't trust him anymore.He describes how horny he is every single day but I can't do anything about it.We don't even have privacy when we meet , it's just public places.So we can't really do anything.And his ex lives near his place , she always pops up out of no where and that girl is extremely horny aswell , he doesn't talk to her much and all but lately he has been talking about her a lot.I try to keep my cool but she sent him a text asking him to go at her place to go get some songs and shit with using all the winking emoticons.So I was like "So go to her place ;)" and he just went like "yeah" an then I was like "Have some good sex with her maybe" and he went like "If I tell her she will do so" and it pissed me off so much!I expected a different reaction but I was like wow!and then I went like "If you're trying to make me jealous think what would you have done if I told you something like that regarding one of my ex" and he was like "I was just telling you what she said" and so I didn't answer his text anymore and he just sent me another text saying "Just dont talk to me if you can't behave properly!" I mean like what the hell?!And so later we fixed the fight and I told him what I expected from him and he just went like "I am devastated and horny but I keep calm and I didn't expect you to ask me things like that , I was shocked" and so I told him that "That doesn't even make sense , I don't even trust you anymore!" and we ended up having a fight again.
I don't know what to do.I love him.Mom knows about us , my cousins know.I don't want us to end.But I don't see any options either. (link)
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Don't be so passive aggressive. Rather than saying things like "So go to her place ;)" or "Have some good sex with her maybe" be direct. Say "I don't want you talking to your ex anymore". Don't try to test guys. In general, they are not very good at catching subtle clues. They will fail the test every time. Instead be clear about what you want. Don't be afraid to say what you mean. The clearer you are, the easier things will become.
As for the fact that you fight, that is the way it goes in relationships. Most relationships with have arguments. This does not mean you need to break up.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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So... I have been having this issue going on for some time now. I have been with my boyfriend for a few years and my mom has not liked him for a while. I first thought that it was a phase. Then, I thought she would grow to like him eventually. But, now it is worse than ever. He was away for a few months for something that he needed to do for school. Those months were pure bliss with my mom. I finally remembered what it was like to love my mom again because we weren't butting heads. We were just friends. I'm 23, by the way. I live with my mom and grandparents at the time because I cannot afford to move out. I live in an expensive city and I'm a teacher, so I don't make very much money. I had a plan to move out, etc. when I had some more money just so that I could have peace of mind. But, it's not happening right now... at least for another couple of months. This summer, like I said, my mom and I re-kindled our relationship.
Upon his return, it was like everything I ever saw in him was different. Things that I took as a joke now seemed serious and rude. For instance, today, I was running late or wanted to slightly change our plans and he told me that my mother was a psycho liar and that I should never believe anything she says. PS, he doesn't know how she feels about him. He was just saying so because she was part of the reason I had to change the plans. Then, I told him that we have all had to sacrifice our plans at one point and I gave him the example about how we both left town on my birthday (to the same place) and didn't see each other because he was with his family and I was with mine. He could have chosen to come with me and I could have chosen to go with his family. But, it was my birthday and I wanted to spend it with my family. I was just using it as an example. I wasn't implying anything about it. This was months ago! And he said that it was my fault that he didn't see me because I decided to go with my family. We were in the same city! He could have certainly made an effort to take a cab or even send some flowers to my hotel... i don't know. I'm not saying something huge. Just an effort to know he was thinking of me. I've excused his behavior since I've met him. Now, I look back and see that it wasn't so nice of a thing to do. And before summer, I would have excused this too and say "he's just frustrated." Now I see how quickly his anger escalates and I don't like it.
There have been other situations that have happened in the past. Like, how he got angry at me because I didn't have cash to pay for parking when he had a wallet full of cash. If we've had a difference in political views, he turns bright red in anger and has pushed me away. One time, he was fighting with someone over politics and I thought they were just talking until I walked through the middle to throw something away. They were at a reasonable distance away from each other so it wasn't like I was cutting through them. He got angry both at me and the other person, but grabbed me and bent my thumb to my wrist. It was throbbing till the next day. I have excused it all. It was like I was under some weird spell. And now, I see how wrong it is.
So, this question is going to be broken down into a few pieces. First of all... I wouldn't even know HOW to end it. I feel like I still care. It's not like I'm a ball of fury. It's just that I think that I deserve to be happy. I want to feel loved. And I have felt loved before, so I know the difference. I don't always want to feel scared that I've offended him. And I can only see this getting worse. Imagine... bending thumbs now... how about when we are married? How about by the time we hit a 20 year anniversary? Do you really think it's going to get better? But, it's just hard. It's like I'm not ready... even though I know this is necessary. How can I get over this? What do I do?
Secondly, I have some issues with my mom that need to be addressed too. She turns into a PSYCHO when he's around. When he's not, she's my best friend. When she's around, she wants to throw me out of the house and tells me that she hopes I know that if I'm with him, she will never be a part of my life and she won't want to meet her grandkids. As much as I love my mom, this is unacceptable behavior from a parent. She is in no way providing a safe environment for me to come to her with real issues that a mother is to help her daughter with. Instead, I feel fear. Then, I burst into anger because I get angry at the fact that at 23, I need to live in fear. And then I feel even angrier because if it weren't for financial issues, I would be able to move out. So, it turns into a whole circle.
I don't want to be deciding this for my mom. I just wish someone can extend a hand and just say: "I think this is what you should do." An objective person. Someone who is not in this situation at all. I am crying out for help. Please answer!
(link)
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It may well be that even though you love each other, you aren't soulmates. If that is the case, now might be a good time to say goodbye and find someone who is better suited to you. I personally think this might be the best idea, judging from what you have written.
But, if you do not want to break up, the other option is to get him some professional help with his anger issues. Could it get better? Of course it could. People change for the better all of the time if they put their minds to it. It could also get worse, though if he refuses to make any effort to change. You need to talk about this with him.
As for your mother, your relationship is not her business. I suggest you tell her to mind her own business and stop being overdramatic.
Most important of all, I think you need to spend time taking care of yourself. Have a bubble bath or eat some nice chocolate. Treat yourself a bit. You deserve it after all you have been going through.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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I'm 20 and I broke up with my first love a year ago. I loved him with every fibre in my being and did literally everything for him, even if it went against my morals. I spent all the money I had on getting him expensive gifts and I stuck with him, even when he couldn't care less about me. When we broke up because of the fact that he didn't wanna deal with commitment, at this stage in his life, he wasn't upset, not even for a day. It's been over a year and I've been the only one carrying all this pain and I've been holding so much hope that we could get back together, someday. We still see each other and he kisses me and that's what gave me hope that he still likes me. But last night, he told me that he'd never even think of marrying someone like me and that he needs a submissive kind of girl who doesn't pick up on the wrong things he does, like I did.I always picked up on all his lies and everything he hid from me. It hit me all at once, last night that he's been using me this past year and using my vulnerability. I cried in front of him for two hours straight and he kept saying the same things like "You're not my first love so I can't hold that much love for you" and "I told you I didn't want a relationship" "My first made me lose all my emotions" . I don't know why I'm so attached to him or why I'm even this devastated over a jerk like him. I just need someone to talk some sense into me. I worry, that I'll never be good enough for someone. What else can I do for someone to make them appreciate me? I allowed him to cross so many limits of mine and went above and beyond for him, and I get this, in return. How will I expect the next guy in my life to appreciate what I'll do for him and not break my heart again? (link)
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This is a hard situation. But I can tell you this: with the right person, you won't have to do anything to get them to appreciate you. They will just appreciate you. It won't matter if you do absolutely nothing to make them love you. The right person will just love you because you are you. So hang in there. You just haven't met the right guy yet.
The other thing I can say is that sometimes, the more you do for people, the LESS they appreciate you. If you give someone everything, the person tends to take it for granted. This is especially true with guys. The more you do for them, the less they appreciate you. This is because guys enjoy a challenge. I'm not saying play hard to get or be coldhearted or anything like that. I'm saying that you shouldn't cross your own limits for guys the way that you did in this relationship. Guys don't like you more when you make sacrifices for them. In fact, they think of you as less valuable because you are willing to give up so much for them. When you give up things for a guy, you are basically saying "my needs don't matter". If you hold firmly to your limits, you are basically saying "I matter!" Guys listen to that and they will treat you better as a result.
A great example is sex. The quicker you sleep with a guy, the less likely it is that the relationship will last. This is for the same reason as above. By sleeping with a guy quickly, you are basically saying "I am not that special. I don't require a lot of work". If you make the guy wait, you are basically saying "I am important. You are lucky to get the chance to experience my personality and if you are very very lucky you will get the chance to experience my body as well". Then the guy stays longer because you have basically told him that you are something special by making him wait.
The bottom line is this: don't worry about impressing men. They more you try to impress them, the less impressed they are. Instead, start believing that you are good enough and that any guy would be lucky to have you. Guys will pick up on that and be even more attracted than before! Oh, and try not to do anything but kiss the guy for the first two months. It's hard, but that really sends the message that you need to be won over by him and that he needs to treat you well in order to get any more physical affection from you.
Toodles,
Miss Piggy
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Good morning / Good afternoon advicenators, I`m 20/f and my bf is 22. I`m from India. We recently broke up a few months ago and decided to stay friends. We broke up because we had been in a secret relationship and finally he wanted to come out but I couldnt let it happen because of my family. The problem is I cant stop thinking about him and I truly still love him. I know for sure my family would never accept him so thats the reason we cant get back together. We still text each other and talk but I want to know how i can just love him as a friend. I want to be with him but because its impossible, I just want to learn how to stop thinking about him constantly without having to stop talking or texting him. (link)
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It's time to meet other guys! I know that you love him. But, if you really don't see a future with him why don't you try befriending other men that your family would approve of? Who knows, you may find someone you like.
If this does not work, than maybe you will have to consider disappointing your family.
Those are really your only two options.
Toodleoo,
Miss Piggy
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