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I'm Jessie. I've been on here on and off for about 7 years. I'm 22 :) I am currently in my final year of college studying English and new media I'm from Ireland I dye my hair way too much. I've been blonde,brown,brown with blonde,black,red,and blonde again!I love helping people I found advicenators when I was just 15 and didn't understand the world! I feel I have matured with this site. The people on here are amazing and I love coming on here in my spare time to be there for people in need. I won't tell you what you want to hear because that's not advice it's just fooling yourself. I try to help in whatever way I can I try not to judge and try to relate to a situation if I can. :) If you don't like honesty then you won't like my advice.
If you're kind enough to rate me please leave a comment letting me know if I helped! I love hearing that I have!
Please try to use proper grammar and be coherent.
I have been featured 4 times. :)
advice
F17
Hey guys Im dating a guy and he is extremely nice to me. I love him but, I sometimes feel hes way to efectionit! I dont get it I love the way he is but I can't figure out all these stupid emotions.. I know your probably saying yea he's a nice guy don't break his heart but I feel a lot of pressure beacause he mentioned the other day he wouldnt be able to move on if I were to break up with him when I never told him I was. That gets me thinking. sometimes I feel i am only with Him for loneliness. Hes like my guy friend but hes also more then that is that how I'm sopose to feelI don't know I just get lots of thoughts in my head :/ help!
Hey there, :)
I understand exactly how you feel. This is how I felt when I first started going out with my boyfriend. Sometimes I loved being around him, he was so sweet nice and kind. But other times I Felt completely disinterested. Like he was into the relationship more than me. I felt like his affectionate ways bugged me. Other times I loved it.
I actually wrote on here asking for advice.
Some of the advice I got from people here, and from my friends, told me it wasn't fair to be with him if I wasn't as committed as him.
But who is 100% devoted to someone at 17?
you're still young. You're still figuring out all of your emotions. Having the responsibility of a relationship is a huge deal. Having to think of someone besides yourself is a huge deal too.
Some like the idea of a relationship more so then the actual person. In some cases this may be true. In which case the right thing to do is to walk away.
However I am a firm believer that relationships take time to grow. One person may develop feelings of love quicker than the other.And that's only natural. Give it time. See how your feelings grow.
I gave my emotions and my boyfriend a chance. and I'm so glad I did because three years later we are still together. You never know. Give it time and see how you feel. You'll no in your heart if it's right or not. There is no point being with him for the sake of it. If you can see it possibly working out in the future, then give it a fair go. If not it's best to end it now
Much
So I'm 17/F and the other night I was at a party on a college campus and it ended up ending a lot sooner than I thought. I was supposed to be spending the night with one of my friends but she went off with her boyfriend because they were in a big fight and basically ditched me... This guy that I kind of have been having a thing with that was there (we'll call him Matt: 19) was like "hey we can just chill in my car and figure it out" cause we were both too drunk to drive. So we're walking to his car and this dude starts yelling stuff at me and I don't really remember what he said lol but I think it was pretty sexual/rude cause it pissed Matt off and Matt was trying to start something with him cause he gets like that when he's drunk... anyway last thing I remember after that was sitting down on the sidewalk being really confused. I woke up in Matt's car but Matt wasn't there, neither were the keys, and the windows were down. I got pretty scared cause I didn't know where he was and I was just sitting in this open car in the middle of a college campus and Matt's phone was in the car so I didn't know what else to do but call one of my freinds Jake to come pick me up. He picks me up and since my friend ditched me and I couldn't go home I ended up having to spend the night at Jakes hous. Jake and I have a history of almost hooking up but never actually doing it and he has a girlfriend now so I knew we had to be extra careful and I was like, I'm not gonna hook up with him. But I was really drunk and so mad at Matt for just leaving me in his car (he ended up texting me saying he was fine and that he was just gonna spend the night in his car so I knew he was okay but I was pissed he had just left me like that). Anyway,I was upset and drunk and I didn't feel well so Jake layed me on his couch and started rubbing my back. He put my head in his lap (on a pillow) and kept going but started to go under my pants... he took my hand and held it for a little while then started moving it toward his penis. I don't know what I was thinking but when he pulled down his pants and put my head there I just started giving him a BJ... I had been going for a little bit and then I stopped and he was like "uh yeah, we prolly shouldn't finish that..." I was like "wtf Jake. why did I do that?" and he says "I don't know but it felt so good I couldn't stop you. If I were single we'd be up in my bed right now but damn..." he didn't even seem sorry, I felt worse than he did and he was comforting me. We agreed we could never tell anyone about it but I'm just freaking out. He wasn't even drunk and he initiated it but if anyone finds out, I'm gonna be the one that gets called a slut and what not. He's going to college in the fall and his gf is only gonna be a junior so he was gonna break up with her at the end of the summer anyway and I know everyone hates his girlfriend cause she's a total bitch but that doesn't make what I did any better and I just feel so awful... He doesn't even seem to feel bad but he doesn't want anyone to find out either. Im just so scared he's gonna tell her or something and he's gonna say my name and oh my gosh... please help!!!
Hey there,
Okay so you made a mistake. You've realised that. You need to stop dwelling on it and beating yourself up over it. We all make mistakes we are simply human. We do stupid things when we drink too much.
It's a lesson to be learned and take on board for the future. If anything Jake was more so in the wrong. He took advantage of you in your drunken state and had absolutely no regard for his girlfriend be she a bitch or not. She doesn't deserve to be cheated on.
I disagree with adviceman. You were not raped..
Rape is defined as:
"The crime, committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with him, esp. by the threat or use of violence."
He didn't force you to have sex with him. You willingly gave him oral sex.
There is a very big difference.
But you stopped. Give yourself credit you realised the wrong doing and made him stop. He won't tell trust me. He won't want to be known as a cheater and likelihood is he will want to keep stringing his girlfriend along until he decides to dump or cheat on her again.
Be careful while drinking in the future. Know your limits and always be on guard. Take it from someone who had her drink spiked you do NOT want that to happen. Don't let guys take advantage of you. If you think that's going to be a problem when drinking well don't drink as much.
So try to relax okay? :) It's in the past move on and learn.
Good luck and much
I would like to start by thanking anyone who takes the time to read this multi-part question. It is as much the result of a need to vent as it is a sincere request for a second opinion in a time in which the rational part of my brain seems to have abandoned me.
I am a 23 year old (male) that moved half way around the world about five months ago on a whim. I have had dates since I got here, but nothing was all that impressive until a few weeks ago. There is a tiny shop tucked away in a mall that I frequent. Around the second or third time I passed through the shop, a girl that works there casually started talking to me. I had to leave, but she asked for me to come back and talk to her some other time. A week later I returned and we talked for over an hour. I found myself thinking about her frequently in the following days and made up my mind to return and ask for her number and ask her out.
Herein lies my first question. I believe that this girl genuinely likes me, but some part of my brain works overtime to convince me that I am in fact delusional and seeing things that aren't there. The girl seemed genuinely pleased when I asked for her number. I went on to try and set up a date then and there, but things went less well. Every time I mentioned something we could do, her face would light up, but that would quickly disappear as we determined that she would in fact be working during every social gathering I was attending that week.
When we talk she seems almost overly interested in me, and she seems to point out some positive quality she sees in me after everything I tell her. If I say I recently graduated from university, she says, "oh, so you're intelligent". If I say I live alone, she says, "oh, you're so independent". I believe that these are all signs that she is genuinely interested, but I would appreciate you confirming this (or rejecting it completely if you think I've gone off the deep end).
I have told her that I sincerely want to get together outside of her work, but I'm wondering if I should be more direct in expressing that I am genuinely interested in more than a casual friendship.
The next part of my question pertains to how to proceed. Even in the best case scenario, more than a couple dates a week will probably not be possible due to both our busy schedules (in this country, people frequently work 70 hours a week or more, and she is one of those people). I feel that if I don't make a serious romantic gesture soon, she may lose interest. Basically, I'm looking for ideas on something fun and meaningful that we could do even with a very limited amount of time.
Ultimately, the rational part of my brain tells me to give up. On paper there is nothing exceptional about this girl. She is by no means the most accomplished or attractive girl I have met recently, but I feel this inexplicable attraction to her that I cannot get over. I am a young man with all a young man's desires, and yet I find myself intrigued with a girl simply from a handful of conversations and phone calls.
Should I let reason prevail? Or should I try to make things work despite the seeming impossibility of the situation? After all, there's a reason why it's called a "leap of faith".
If you have made it this far, I would like to congratulate you. Patience is a virtue that you certainly possess. Know that your advice is sincerely appreciated.
Hey there,
Okay In my opinion you are over-thinking things a little bit too much.
You said you believed she genuinely likes you,but then as you say you have doubts. Such as second guessing yourself. It's natural we all do that from time to time.
All the signs are there that she is really interested in you. She frequently compliments you,someone who likes someone wouldn't keep doing it for the sake of it. You are not imagining things this girl likes you.
You also mentioned her face lit up when you suggested getting together,followed by disappointment when realising that she couldn't. Again tell tale signs. As you said she works a lot and so do you. So her reasons weren't fabricated.
Text her and tell her how you feel! Or in person id you would prefer. Let her know that you really like her and can't stop thinking about her and that you really hope you can get together soon.
Why don't you take her out to a romantic dinner?You really can't go wrong there. It's one of my favourite things to do with my boyfriend. As I love trying new restaurants. Does she have a preferred type of food or anything she has mentioned?Like Italian or French or something.
You could keep it casual and see a movie but as you said you wanted something meaningful..
Bring her flowers and if you're going with the whole dinner thing maybe go for a walk after wards along the beach if there is one near? Or go for a drink.
I don't really know what else to suggest as far as first dates go,there isn't a lot you could do. As you get to know her the more romantic gestures will follow.
You could send her flowers at work to let her know you're interested in being more than just friends?
She doesn't have to be the most attractive or accomplished girl as long as you like her. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There is obviously something special about her if you find yourself drawn to her.
By all means don't give up. It's not an impossible situation,just a slightly inconvenient one due to work load. Find a time that suits there surely will be one and go from there.
Good luck and I sincerely hope I helped. If you have any more questions please,do not hesitate to inbox me.
Much
I recently started dating a guy. I have known him since I was little but we starting becoming friend about a year ago. We texted everyday talked every night he called me beautiful and things like that. I found out he liked me asked him about it and we ended up dating but now I feel different. I feel like he'd more of a friend then a boyfriend. I've never been physically attracted to him but he had a great personality. I feel like if were going to kiss I won't want to do it. Can you have a relationship without physical attraction? Also Im not very good at complimenting people. I can be mean but I just joke around. I feel like as his girlfriend I should be all "aw you're so sweet. I love you" blah blah but I cant. With all my past boyfriends I've never been like that. Im not clingy and I dont express my feelings. How can I be nicer to him. How do I make him feel like he means something to me. I think I have this wall up because Im scared to get hurt. Or is it because deep down he's just a friend to me and I dont want to tell him these things. I love talking to him and he makes me laugh and smile,but friends do that too. I can't break up with him because what if I do like him and Im just too stupid to know it.
Hey there,
Okay let me tell you this is exactly how I felt about my boyfriend when we first started dating. So I can feel I can relate to this quite a bit.
I didn't find him sexually attractive what so ever.
But he was the sweetest,kindest most down to earth guy I had EVER met. He made me laugh like no one else ever could and just truly understood me. I felt like I could be myself around him. Everyone kept telling us to date but I just didn't feel it. After about a year and a half he was there for me during a very bad break up,and I realised maybe what i've been looking for has been right in front of me? (as cliche as that sounds)
So I gave it a go. In the begining much like you I felt like I just couldn't be attracted to him.I Would cringe whenever he would commpliment me or call me baby or babe. I couldn't call him those things at all. Around 5-6months In I contemplated ended it. But I said id give it a little longer. My sister told me that when you fall in love with someones personality,eventually the physical attraction will shine through. And you know what?That is exactly what happened. Almost 3years later we're still together,and stronger than ever.
I don't know how or when but I just found myself becomming more and more attracted to him physically.
So what I would say to you is give it a bit more time. You only recently started dating love takes time to grow in my opinion.
I put up walls like you also but you need to learn to let them down just a bit to let people in. There's a risk you might get hurt but that risk is there with any relationship. As the relationship progresses you will find it easier to let him in and express yourself. You don't have to do it by saying I love you a 100 times a day or calling him baby or whatever. Find your own little ways of showing it. Like posting his favourite song or a song that reminds you of him to his facebook if he has one. Or texting him a random song lyric. Stuff like that.
Some would say it's not fair to lead him on,but I don't think you're doing that. I think you do really care for him you just don't Love him yet. My boyfriend confessed his love for me first but it took me a lot longer. And that's okay :)
You will know if it's going somewhere or not. So in short give it a little more time and see how your feelings are then,if you think there is no way you could ever be intimate with him well then it's best to end it.
Good luck and I really hope I helped. :)
Much
13/f how do you know if you still have feelings for Someone? Cause I used to like this guy then he crushed my heart and I'm having dreams now.
Hey there,
Well do you still think about him a lot? Do you get a feeling in the pit of your stomach when you see,talk, or think about him? If he's pretty much all you can think about well then yes you most likely still have feelings for him.
Especially if you're dreaming about him. I guess the real issue here is what to do with those feelings.
You say he crushed your heart, in that case it's best to move on.
I know it's hard but it gets easier with time. Just surround yourself with your friends and keep busy with the things you love to do.
Distract yourself when you start to think about him and delete his number. It's easier that way. Before you know it some one new and better will come along :) You're still so young remember,there is plenty of time for dating and liking guys. Enjoy being single,young and carefree while you can. Trust me relationships can be very stressful.
Good luck and Much
My boyfriend just left to basic camp training and he has been away for about 4 weeks now. The problem is that he broke up with me before he left because he thought that it would be better for our relationship. I really do not agree. He wants to keep our communication going even though we are not really "together" and it is making me emotionally unstable. How can I deal with this situation when I love this person so much that I don't want to lose him? He will be gone for a 1 year and about 7 months after Basic Camp Training but he still wants me to visit him and still talk as if nothing has happened. What should I do? I need help!
Hey there,
Okay it sounds to me like he wants the best of both worlds. That's a dangerous situation to get into. It will toy with you emotionally and physically. I mean it's just not healthy.
You're not together but then in a sense you're going to be acting like you are.
It will just cause a lot of hurt in my opinion.
You can't just forget nothing happened.
If he was 100% committed to you he would stay together and you would visit and keep in contact.
It's so hard when your boyfriend is in the military. I know first hand in a way. My dad was in the military for 21 years. So my mom had to deal with him being gone a lot. And me and my sisters too as young children. He was often gone on year long placements. But if you love someone so much it's a sacrifice worth taking. My mom and dad remained together and are stronger than ever.
What you need to decide is,is this the kind of life/relationship you want? With your boyfriend gone overseas for months on end?
Can you handle it?If you think you can explain this to him. Tell him you want to make it work as a couple. But if he can't do it then neither can you. You should remain friends and only that. None of this acting like nothing happened and visiting etc.
As you said it's making you emotionally unstable. You may as well be in the relationship if that's what you will be doing.
So talk to him about it more find out how he truly feels,why he wanted you to break up. Tell him how you feel,decide what you truly want and go from there.
Good luck and Much
So I've been talking to this guy for a while and we've been getting a lot closer lately. We both feel like amazing connection with each other, or at least he says he does, but we just feel right together. We skyped a few days ago and and were going to again today. I texted him at around 3 and he didn't text me back till 8 asking me if we could skype. I texted back and said yeah let's do it, he told me he was going to call in a little bit but never did... I kinda of just shrugged it off but still wondered why he blew me off. I didn't say anything to him about it though because I did not want to feel clingy or anything like that. A few hours later he called me while I was out and I didn't answer. He texted me after with a sad face and I didn't answer. About an hour later he called me again and I didn't answer. Mostly for the reason that I was out with people and I couldn't really talk to him. But do you think I did the right thing to show I'm not too clingy or that I am always available when he wants me? Should I wait for him to text me or should I text him first?
Hey there,
Yes I think you were right not to answer to him right away. You were genuinely busy. There could be many reasons as to why he didn't text back or skype that time. He too,could have been genuinely busy or got distracted. Or he could have blew you off.
Either way I wouldn't make a habit of ignoring him on purpose just to get back at him. I know that's not what you did but for future incidents.
I would text him and keep it casual Say "Hey,sorry I was out with friends and couldn't really talk the other day. How is everything with you,you never skyped me" Or something to that effect.
It's good not to be too clingy or desperate but at the same time you don't want to keep getting blown off. If he continues to do it I would have a talk to him about it or else move on. But for now keep talking like you usually do and allow for the fact that you both on occasion might be busy. But don't take crap either. If he says he is going to skype and then continually doesn't somethings up.
Good luck and much
My boyfriend and I have a long distance relationship. As of now, he is 15 and I'm 14. He is very sweet but his anger tends to get out of control sometimes(such as swearing a lot) Recently, he encountered one of his friends on Facebook. He told me that he was mad because he had asked her a question and she told him that she would tell, but wanted to know why he was asking. He blocked her and was extremely annoyed. He asked me what i thought of it and I didn't know what to say. I thought that he overreacted to it but even though he never has, I still didn't want him to get mad at me for saying he was rude. I never see him other than online but i don't know what to tell him. His anger gets out of control but he apologized for yelling. If somebody could give me some advice, i'd be grateful! Sorry the question is so long!!
Thank you.
Hey there, Okay you might not like what I'm about to say but I think you need to consider the healthiness of this relationship and whether its actually going anywhere. The fact is you shouldnt be afraid to say what you really think. You have an opinion you shouldnt have to hold back in a relationship. And you definitely shouldnt be tip toeing around him for fear of setting him off. Take it from someone who has dated over the internet it only ever ends in heart ache. Especially since you dont see one another. You need the physical effects of a relationship as well as the emotional. I was in a relationship with a guy online when I was 15 and i litterally would do anything to make him happy. Such as agreeing with him all the time. My life outside of him suffered I fell behind in school and saw my friends less. I know this may not be the case but it could be. In the end he dumped me for a girl who lived near him. I would reconsider your relationship with this boy perhaps just be friends. Good luck and much
Hi everyone!
I'm with this man now, we were on and off for about a year, but for the past month and a half we decided we cared for each other too much and really got serious. And I can honestly say I love him, which I've never felt before, he's my second serious bf but the first who ever took me out and introduced me to his friends. To me he's perfect! (though 5 years older than me, which occasionally causes trouble but we usually forget about it)
Anyway, my problem arises more so with my father, my parents never were very faithful to one another but I believe they loved each other, about 2 years ago my father cheated once again and my mother had had enough of his betrayals so wanted a divorce... This was a messy, angry divorce. My dad cut all contact from me, I had no birthday/Christmas cards and he had been telling everyone I should be making the effort to call him, as if he was the victim. This was as I was doing my A-levels and preparing for uni, so I had alot on my plate.
So basically, ever since I'd caught him cheating and seen how hurt my mother was from a younger age, it seems to have stuck with me. I can't trust men very easily, not with that at least, I'll do anything for my man, but when he is asleep, and his phone is there I have to fight every fibre of my being to not look at it, since he forbid me too really... He gave me his fb password and his phone password based on the trust that I'd not use them to snoop and I have done very well considering my history, but what I want is a way to get over the paranoia!
I haven't told him, because I know I'm being stupid and I know he loves me. He's a man that enjoys many friends and his freedom and I don't want to restrict that, but as I'm a uni student we have to spent holidays apart, and I read into the smallest thing all the time :(
Is there a way to just get over this one trust issue? without involving him too deeply preferably :) thanks
Hey there,
Okay it's completely natural to feel this way given the way your father acted.
Girls look up to their fathers as role models. Our father represents the way in which we see many other men.
The fact that your man trusts you enough to give you his fb password and phone password says an awful lot. It means he has nothing to hide right?
Which should give you some peace of mind.
I would really reconsider telling him about it if I were you. How do you know that it won't actually help?
Sharing your insecurities with your partner brings you closer together. He will be able to reassure you,and you can work on getting through it together.
That way you won't frighten him away.
But of course that is an option completely up to you.
Have you considered counselling?this could be a great way to really vent all your emotions and fears,as well as beginning to overcome your paranoia and trust issues.
Remember not all men are like your father. There are great men out there. Sometimes we just need to let our walls down just a little to allow them in. There is a risk of getting hurt of course but that risk is there with any relationship in life.You just have to take the risk.
You won't get anywhere if you don't
So please consider talking to someone about this :)
Good luck and I hope I helped
much
Ok so I have actually had my first kiss before but my new boyfriend hasnt and we've been dating since november. He says he wants to kiss me before the school year ends (thursday) and I said okay but truth is im so freaking nervous =/ WHy am i nervous about this when Ive had my first kiss before? Advice? Hes really shy..
Hey there,
It's natural to feel nervous when you're going to be kissing anyone for the first time! Regardless of whether or not you have actually kissed someone before.
It's probably just because you like him so much.
I remember my first kiss with my boyfriend. Bearing in mind we had both kissed tonnes of people before. But we liked each other soo much we were both so nervous and just spent ages lying really close to each other before we finally did.
Just remember to relax and take it slow.
Also remember it's his first kiss ever! so he is probably going to be equally if not more nervous.
It will all come together naturally don't think or stress too much about it because then it won't be special.
Good luck and much
I went on another date with this guy, and its not that my gut says move on, when I'm with him he makes me happy. Makes me feel like whatever happened in my life is pointless, I can move on from it.
The night before our date, I told him the only way I would take his jacket is if we were boyfriend and girlfriend.
During our date at the end of the movie, he tried to give me his jacket, so I said "I don't know what your talking about" but he replied with "Oh, I think you do"
My question, Did i completely miss a chance to finally be his girlfriend?
Hey there,
I agree with the previous columnist your first paragraph is a bit off.
Needs some elaboration and clarification.
Anyway, Why did you say "I don't know what you're talking about?"
You told him the only way you would take his jacket is if you were bf/gf He offers you his jacket a clear sign and you refuse?
He was obviously hinting..why didn't you accept?
He might feel a bit confused by this and like you were sending him mixed signals.
You might not have totally missed your opportunity but you did put a dent in it.
Keep hanging out and maybe it should arise again.
Good luck
Jess 18/f
20/f. I have been with my bf for 18 months now, and sometimes I contemplate whether or not we will be together forever or if I am wasting my time. We have so much fun together and definitely lots in common, but we also have very big differences as well, such as some of my friends obviously don't like him, and my family is not a fan of him either. As for his friends and family, they love me. There isn't a really solitified reason why some of my friends and family don't like him, it just kind of came to be that way. I'm also very outgoing and social, with lots of friends; he has one good friend, and two other casual friends. It may not seem like a big difference, but it is when it comes down to making plans and lifestyles, etc. As my last point, sometimes I think he can be a bit immature for our age, but only with his not having a job reasoning, and how he never pays EVER when we go out. Actually, I pay almost all of the time, unless he brings money, then we pay separately. I have listed a lot of negatives, but there are lots of positives as well. I just don't know what to do or what to think. Any opinion would be very appreciated, thank you! Sorry this was long.
Hey thank's for inboxing. :)
Okay I guess the real question here is do you truly love your boyfriend?
If the answer is yes then you will be able to overcome these differences and they shouldn't matter so much.
When you are with someone for so long it's completely natural to question things and notice their flaws and what not. But sometimes the real beauty of a relationship is not agreeing 100% or being totally compatible.
It would be nice however if he paid once in a while It's always nice to be spoiled. Me and my boyfriend usually split the bills but every now and again when he can afford it he will pay for dinner and movie.
I think you should sit down with your boyfriend and voice your concerns.Talk it through. It helps a great deal. However you also must realize that you can't change a person.
Are these differences you are willing to accept and live with? Such as your family and friends not liking him that's pretty hard to deal with.
You need to decide if your love for him surpasses these differences. Can you overlook them or are they going to always weigh heavily on your mind and heart?Because if they are you might want to seriously think about the relationship,and if it's worth the stress. Have a talk and see where you stand then.
Sometimes these little doubts go away on their own and you become more accepting but other times it just doesn't work out.
Go with your heart it's almost never wrong! As cliche as that sounds. Chances are deep down you probably already know the answer.
Good luck and much
20/f I've had a boyfriend for over a year. We usually do everything together, but some of my college friends have asked me to go out with them, specifically one of my good (girl) friends from school. She wants to go to a party at a house that will be coed so there will be other guys. She never said I could invite my boyfriend, would it be wrong for me to go to the party (not talk to guys flirtatiously at all) without my boyfriend? I want him to come, but I think if she wanted him to come she would have asked. I feel awkward now and I don't know what to do. Thanks
Hey there,
Personally I don't see it as a problem at all should you chose to go. In fact if I were you I would go!
It's completely healthy for boyfriends and girlfriends to do things separately. It shouldn't be an issue. Like you said you are going with your friend to have a good time and guys will happen to be there,it doesn't mean you are going to do anything with them.
You need to be able to socialize without your boyfriend from time to time.
I go out all the time without my boyfriend and vice versa. We trust each other completely so it isn't an issue.
Why not ask your friend is it okay if he comes along? I don't see the problem she probably forgot to mention. Or maybe she just wants a girls night?
Talk to your boyfriend about it if he is feeling insecure and reassure him that nothing will happen with other guys. He needs to be able to give you this space though and allow you to go out on your own from time to time.
Good Luck and Much
Okay so the guy im dating now is pretty awesome, but we have awkward conversations all the time and hes a boring texter weve been dating for three weeks now and all i hear is either eww cant believe you like him she dated him to,im thinking what the hell or im hearing im so glad I told him to start liking you if i never told him to like you,you guys wouldnt be together at first i didnt believe her but two nights ago i found a note beteen them sayding hes not over his ex and she isnt to happy were together either so on the note she says why dont ask angie out and he says oh i dont know if she likes me so ya its annoying me like ya i asked him before why does he like me he said he like me the year before ever since then a little and that he doesnt like being single and something else but i forgot. we already kissed three time too and ever since the first kiss he says i love you alot. is he like using me or something. matter of fact im not even sure i like him that way cus when i text him i dont get excited that much,but when i text these other guys i get all happy and blush like crazy and those guys i can actually talk with its not awkward at all. they also always say stuff like you and your boyfriend arent going to end out well and that they think im beautiful,they said those things before i dated my boyfriend so okay im asking should i dump him cus heck hes just dating me so he isnt single, honestly i dont care cus i like being single myself.also how do i stop the other guys from flirting with me, and to deal with my bestfriend saying that stuff????thanks so much-angie!!!!!!!!
Hey there,
Okay this was a little hard to read but i'l give it a shot.
If I'm honest it really sounds like you are not that into your boyfriend. It seems you only like the IDEA of a relationship and not the actual relationship. Same goes for him,he even admitted he's only with you because he doesn't like being single. You should be in a relationship where you are really crazy about the guy and he WANTS to be with you and you him. Not just for convenience or for the sake of saying you are in a relationship. Don't feel pressured to be in a relationship because everyone else is.
It's especially obvious you aren't happy if you are finding comfort in compliments from other guys.
I think it's time you end it and move on. Be realistic here. You don't love him so what's the point?
If you are uncomfortable with other guys flirting with you tell them to tone it down a little.
You also need to talk to your bestfriend. Let her know her comments are hurtful and unwelcome.
Good luck and much
Okay, my best friend told me she was lesbian this morning, and I'm attracted to her. I afraid to tell her I'm lesbian, and she's really sexy, and I don't think she likes me like that. She hits on me, and I act disgusted, but I'm really not. I'm afraid she'd turn me down if she knew I was lesbian. What should I do?
Hwy there,
You shouldn't be afraid to tell her you're a lesbian. She had the courage to tell you?. Don't act disgusted. Why should you feign an act? If she hits on you then why would she turn you down? She is a lesbian too remember so what's the problem here? You are both lesbians you are both attracted to one another so go for it.
Don't be ashamed of who you are and act disgusted. Don't pretend to be something you're not.
Tell her how you feel. Nothing to lose everything to gain.
It's not like she's a lesbian and you're straight and vice versa.
Good luck and much
This boy and I have been friends for quite a while now. We started to text as friends but then it grew on to a flirting level, I started to really like him but when I told him he went really awkward and wouldn't pay attention anymore, he would not reply to my messages. I was being a little obsessive and would not leave him alone, then he turned around and said I do not like you get it in to your mind, we argued and then I appologised and I asked to be friends and he agreed but he is still being awkward through texts when I even try to make conversation. I must admit I have fell in love with him, it feels like he has torn me apart, I don't know what to do. I thought may be friends then it would build back up because he seemed interested before. Can anyone help me on what to do or say? May be text him and say something to make him realise or.. I don't know I am confused and hurt, what should I do? Someone please help I really appreciate it
Hey there,
I can understand how hurt you must feel. It's not nice when you pour your heart out to someone and they respond by shutting you out.
If I were you I would do my best to forget about this guy. He has made it clear he doesn't like you like that,and unfortunately at this point there is nothing more you can do about it. If you continue to send him texts he his just going to ignore you further. You don't wanna come off as desperate. The way he reacted wasn't fair,sure its bound to be awkward for a while but if he was a true friend and cared about your feelings he would make more of an effort to move past it. He dealt with the whole situation in a most insensitive manner. On the other hand you cannot make him have feelings for you as much as you want to. I know how much it sucks I have been in this position before. I would say the ball is in his court now. You have apologized and asked to be friends. I wouldn't text him first anymore let him make the effort.
Do your best to forget about him and move on. Spend time with friends and keep yourself occupied. Whenever you start to think about him do something fun or relaxing to distract yourself. Like listen to music watching a movie or going shopping. I find when I am really stressed I like to bake but that's just me!
Wait for a guy who will truly appreciate you and show you the respect and adoration you deserve. Don't be disheartened there are nice guys out there. Don't let this one set back hold you back. My inbox is always open if you ever need anyone to talk to.
Good luck and much
Last night I had a terrible argument with my boyfriend,I insulted him, I treated him really bad and practically sent him to hell.The thing is that I'm sure that he's cheating on me.He told me he was in bed but I could hear the sound of a car passing by,so I immediately figured he was actually in his car pretending to be in his room,why does he do that to me?We made a promise some time ago and he just can't keep his f&$&& word!I'm so mad but at the same time I'm missing him a lot,it's driving me mad,even though I know I should dump him and try to forget all about him I just can't,and I'm eager to receive his call cause I cannot stand being alone without knowing anything about him.What can I do?Shall I call him,text him?or shall I try to think about nothing but me from now on and what to do tomorrow all by myself now?Thanks,I'm so sad...
Hey there,
You may not like this at all but anyway..
Okay how do you know he was cheating on you? Do you have any actual proof? Did it occur to you that he may have actually been in bed?and that car you heard was just one passing outside?There are loads of possibilities and explanations to this.
I think you may have over reacted just a little bit.
Did you give him a chance to explain?
I understand you may be feeling insecure and are afraid of getting hurt and this leads you to act a little paranoid and accusative. But this will only drive him further away.
You said it yourself you are not sure he is actually cheating on you?
It seems like you have some genuine trust issues. And if that's the case perhaps you should take a break from him and work on that yourself.
Has he ever showed signs before that he may be cheating? has he a history of it?
The fact is you can't assume these things unless he has been acting genuinely suspicious.
Example lying to you all the time sneaking behind your back not coming home etc.
I think you need to sit down with him and explain your fears and worries. Maybe you just need reassurance.
Otherwise you are going to drive yourself absolutely crazy. You don't want to become the jealous paranoid type trust me.
I really think you are jumping to conclusions. Just talk to him okay?
try not to worry.
Good luck and much
So I really like this guy, and I think he's flirting back - but he's so intentional to everyone, so i don't know if he's really flirting or just acting like he always does to girls.
he's 22.
i'm 20.
here's the queston: what are some body language signs i can look for to see if he is flirting? / interested or whatever! thanks
Hey there,
Okay ask yourself these questions:
Does he brush up against you? Find reasons to touch you or be near you? Does he go out of his way to talk to you? Does he flirt a lot? Pay you compliments? Notice how he acts around other girls. Does he act the same around all girls or is he different with you?I.e pays you more attention? Usually the player types will flirt with every girl but a guy who is truly interested in you will only have eye for you.
It's always hard trying to gauge if a guy likes you,or is just being friendly. Some guys are natural flirts. Flirt with him and see if he flirts back!
These are the subtle ways I use to try and tell!
Good luck and much
i'm 13 and i was with this guy around 3 months, the first month at a party we went off together and he fingered me and i gave him a hand job, then after than night mostly everytime we met up we done something. is this bad? he did ask me to have sex with him but i said no. everyone found out about what we done and now people call me a slag-_- am i really that bad??
Hey there,
No I would not call you a slag. You have your own free will at the end of the day,but honestly I wouldn't make a habit out of it. You don't want to get a reputation as the girl who gets off with random guys at parties. Don't feel pressured into doing anything you are not comfortable with. Especially at your age there is sooo much time for all that. Just enjoy being young and carefree.
If I am being completely honest with you it sounds like this guy is just interested in engaging in sexual activity with you.
Every time you have met up you said you have done something. And he asked you to have sex after just 3 months. Do you guys hang out and just be a couple?go to the mall movies etc? or is it purely making out?Be careful and don't let your guard down. But well done for not giving in and saying no.
Don't let guys take advantage of you,find a guy who will treat you with the respect and adoration you deserve.
Good luck and much
15/F
I want a boyfriend, but I don't know if anyone likes me. How do you tell if a guy likes you or if he's just being nice?
Hey there,
Okay well take note of his body language. Does he brush up against you? Find reasons to touch you or be near you? Does he go out of his way to talk to you? Does he flirt a lot? Pay you compliments? Notice how he acts around other girls. Does he act the same around all girls or is he different with you?I.e pays you more attention? Usually the player types will flirt with every girl but a guy who is truly interested in you will only have eye for you.
It's always hard trying to gauge if a guy likes you,or is just being friendly. Some guys are natural flirts. Flirt with him and see if he flirts back!
These are the subtle ways I use to try and tell!
Good luck and much