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April 28, 2014

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If I run for between 30 mins to an hour, at least 5 times a week, do you think I will be able to lose a stone and half by late february?

Hey,

After my quick research into how much a stone is... I got your target to be just under 10kg in about 3 months.

The answer is yes, you certainly can. Just remember that weight loss is a product of the net calorie intake... so while your exercise target is impressive, it will not guarantee any weight loss on its own. The diet makes up the other half.

So, eat reasonably and exercise regularly and you can certainly achieve your goal.

Good luck.

Do guys get turned off if a girls never made out with anyone?

Not at all.

And in regards to being bad at it (as the person below mentioned), this will not be a big issue unless you bit his ear off or something :D

..or do they just STOP liking the one they're with, when they break up with them, even if someone new isn't on the horizon?

Please note that this isn't related to me, it's just something I've always wondered.

It especially makes me wonder about men when really nice guys, or guys who seem that way, act so flirtatious with their gal pals but still have a steady relationship. Do they even realize they're flirting?

Basically the simple answer to all your questions is "sometimes" :)

The longer answer is that guys and situations are different. Sometimes one may stop liking the person one is with. Other times one may find someone else.

Now, what you want to watch out for is guys who have a tendency to move from one girl to another. Guys who get bored easily for example, or who are always looking for the first love sort of feeling. Its more about the pattern with each individual guy rather than with our gender as a whole. I actually do not think we are any different from females in this respect.

As for the flirting... again it depends on the guy. Some (maybe even many guys) may not be aware that they are flirting. Some may not even regard it as flirting. If I had to guess I would say that probably most guys would fall into one of those categories... but, like before, there would be some guys who are perfectly aware of what they are doing.

Not much of a definite answer I know, but guys really are quite different from one another.

female.
I play soccer and i don't think its anything big but my left knee is like acting funny. like i will be sitting down and put my legs straight out and sometimes it will pops almost like theirs a bubbler, or it kinda is irritating. Do you think it will just go away and its normal or could something be wrong?

It is always a good idea to have these things checked. The thing with knee problems is you really cant tell. As a soccer player myself, I have had every imaginable injury, including some major knee issues in my 20s.

My first impression with your thing is that most people get strange things with their knees, and often its nothing. So I wouldn't worry about it, particularly if there is no pain. But, the reason its important to get a doctor to have a look at it is so it does not get worse. I was fortunate enough to dodge surgery... but a couple of my friends were not so lucky. So get it checked, that way, if it could be something more, you will be able to nip it in the bud.

would want to marry?

Title says it, really. Why would God, who knows all about us before He gives us life, let someone who will inevitably, truly, with all their heart want to raise a family be so ugly that no man would want them?

With all these kinds of "why would god" questions (e.g. why would god let a child suffer, why would god let injustice prevail, why would god let people die of painful diseases, etc) there are 3 options:

1. He does not want to do anything about it

2. He is unable to do anything about it

3. He does not exist

If it is 1, then he his no good god. If it is 2, then he is no omnipotent god. If it is 3... well, then everything pretty much happens by chance and/or nature's trial and error.

So, to answer your question, I challenge your original premise - the fact that you assume there is a god that knows us and gives us life. There is absolutely nothing to back that assumption (unfortunately).

As with everything, we are dealt the hand we are dealt. Some good people are born handicapped, some have mental deficiencies, some have horrible diseases, etc. Meanwhile some bad people have it all. Its terribly random and terribly unfortunate. Its life.

That being said, there is often more to things than just looks. I dont know how old you are, or what you have been through, but the possibility of finding someone is only limited, not precluded, by "bad" looks. There is a lot that can make up for it in terms of personality, attitude, energy, etc. and some guys (particularly later in life) will see through that.

My bf was over yesterday night and we dry humped with our clothes on. He was wearing skinny jeans and boxers and i was wearing short shorts with underwear. This only went on for about five minutes. I heard from my friends that sperm can travel through clothes. He told me that he ejaculated in his boxers and i asked him if he had to clean himself and he was like nahh its dry now. so i checked for stains and there were none thank GOD. but to be safe i changed my underwear and shorts. THEN when he left i showered and i scrubbed my vagina. there was a stain in my underwear but i, myself cummed as well. do i have a chance of getting pregnant? that would suck cause i'm 15. anyways i only get my period once a year. i got it for the first time when i was 13 in jan. then i got it again when i was 14 in jan. do you think im infertile? help. easy five points!

Its not really true that the life of a sperm cell is practically zero outside the human body. The sperm will tend to live as long as the fluid does not dry up. Not sure where this myth started, but its not true.

Now, all that being said, I agree that the chance of pregnancy is pretty much zero, since it clearly did not reach all the way. There are just too many unlikely factors here for you to worry about it.

im 17 f my friend is 15f and he acts like he owns me i was only friends to be nice cause everyone makes fun of him but he always cusses meoout if i dont wanna hang ooutof my ffriends or guuy s over i dont no what to do im sick of how he trys to run my life!

I'm sorry if this is a silly question, but why can't you just tell him to hit the road?

Or alternatively tell him to stop acting like this (and explain calmly what it is you don't like) or else you will cut ties with him.

I don't think this situation is more complicated than that. He sounds selfish and immature, and there isn't all the much more you can do.

Good luck.

so I'm in college and seems a lot of weight nowdays and I can't stop eating late at night and eating out a lot of junk food how can I fix this? its hard to avoid junk food and I don't exercise that much anymore but I walk 20 minutes to school everyday

There is no magic formula unfortunately. It will boil down to eating less, eating smarter, and/or exercising more.

You should start by taking one habit (or part of a habit) at a time and changing it. Then bit by bit you can begin to tackle your problem.

First thing I would do is be prepared. If you know you eat late, have some healthier food alternatives ready. Cook during the day, or find some healthy snacks, so that when hunger strikes you have something decent close at hand. Something low on carbs and high on protein would be good.

Try to eat out less, or to go to places that have healthier alternatives. There isn't much else to do with this one. Same goes for exercise. The walk you take is good, but it would be even better if you did something a bit more strenuous.

I think the key is focusing on small steps, thinking ahead, and preparing yourself.

I could add a little psychology to all this: Focus your mind on the new habits that you want to implement, not on the old habits that you want to drop. Dont say to yourself "I shouldn't eat junk food". Or "I wont be lazy anymore". Apparently the brain does not understand negative phrasing very well (or at all), and one ends up reinforcing bad habits by talking to oneself that way. At least that's what they say :)

Focus on the things you want to do, talk to yourself positively, and set clear and attainable goals.

Good luck.

i need hellppp and i dont know what i do

i work at a place that i realllly enjoy and i love all my coworkers. i've been working here for about a month but last week i got offered a job at another place where this guy that i have always liked works. We have always been friends but never anything more, and i was really excited to work with him and see him alot more. But the job is really boring and pays alot less. its not about the money but for so many other reasons i want to stay at my first job but everytime i think im going to turn down the second, i see the guy and imagine how fun it would be working with him, i dont know what to do, should i stay at the job that i love? or quit and work with the guy who i have always had a crush on???

Personally I think changing jobs is a bad idea. It would be one thing if you guys actually had something more than friendship, but to throw away a good situation like you have now on a maybe... that's just no good.

Think about it, what if nothing more happens? Or if something does happen but it does not work out. And you are stuck in a boring job earning less money. This is definitely a time to be pragmatic in my opinion.

Good luck.

How do I learn to play better chess?

I am ok at it, but I feel like there is something I am just missing and that is why I get beat so often.

Anything that helped you that might help me?

Thank you!

Would have helped to know how good you are... and if you have read any chess theory.

Anyway, this is what I would suggest:

- First, as white, pick a few major opening lines and read about them. You can also find instructional videos on youtube for most openings, but I find them a bit irritating compared to a written analysis. Make sure they fit your style i.e. the kind of game your like depending on how aggressive/defensive a player you are.

- As black, learn to respond to the most common openings- particularly 1.e4. If you play against someone often then by all means use their opening strategy as inspiration. Narrow things down as much as you can so that you can focus on a certain type of opening/situation.

- If you have not done so already, learn the basic principles of opening play (also in case your opponent deviates from your line, which he will undoubtedly do). You can check out chess opening principles on a search engine or youtube.

- Practice analysing positions. By this I mean treating it like a tree with branches that divide into other branches which you explore as far as is feasible and then move to a different branch. Training your mind to go deeper and deeper is a huge advantage.

- Try your hand at chess puzzles. I dont mean the novelty problems where you have to find a checkmate in X moves, but more where you have to analyze positions and suggest moves. Again, there are probably many free resources here too and definitely many good books.

Beyond this, try to analyse your game and see why it is that you often lose. Where is the problem? The opening, the middle game, the end game? What are your weaknesses. Identify the kind of player you are and work on what is missing.

Some people like pratising with computers, personally I hate it. But, it may be something for you. There are many free chess programs out there if you do not already have one. Here is a pretty decent one:

http://www.mayothi.com/nagaskaki.html

I am sure there are a million other things I could say, but it's all I can think of at the moment.

Good luck :)

I have been on birth control for almost a month! But anyway, My boyfriend and I were having sex and he had a condom on and he came inside of me.. and when we took the condom off, I blew air into it and they're were no holes or anything but Im still a little paranoid so am I okay?!

ThankYou:)

The chance of anything happening is incredibly small. Both forms of birth control are effective on their own, I think together the odds of anything happening are virtually nil.

You are requested to name the most effective sleeping pills availabe easily at medical store.

For a further note, i am not mental illing problem or any domestic prob., I am 38 yrs male indian, single, doing pvt. job, just fed up from living unmeaningly life with unwanted issues which are not even relate to me.

Thats why, I want to take it for easy suicide. If you think I need any guidance to live, just ignore the massage.

Thanks

Hi, first let me say how sorry I am that you have decided to do this. I am not one to preach about such things, and I have been quite close to where you are now myself.

However, no one here can answer your question. We are not allowed to give suicide advice. In fact all we can do is offer a shoulder to lean on and a friendly ear. Beyond that, if anyone actually does give you advice, it will just get them into trouble.

Again, I am sorry for your situation and I hope you will find some way to resolve it.

Well im i the 7th grade and im 13. i'm about 20 punds and i really would like to lose it. any sugestions? i really can't help what i eat ecause i just grabs whats in the house for breakfest, we don't have healthy lunches at school. and for dinner its usualy pizza or spagheti.

Ok, I read through the answers below and I have a few things to add.

First, no one mentioned the obvious. Exercise more. Weight loss is a function of your calorie balance which is the calories in vs calories out (i.e. exercise).

Cardio is excellent, so are sports. In fact no matter what everyone should be doing at least 3 cardios per week (steady pace, min 20 minutes in duration) just for your heart's health. This could be biking, running, swimming etc.

In my opinion thats your best first move.

Then, start weeding out some of the worsts elements in your food. What is in the house at breakfast? Look for things like oats, whole wheat bread, low fat dairy products, low fat meats, fruit, eggs (in moderation), etc.

As for later in the day, you can try some of the suggestions mentioned below. Its hard to say sometimes how bad things are e.g. spaghetti can be ok, say if its made with a healthy meat sauce (not high fat beef). Pizza rarely is, so you should really moderate that.

As for how much you need to lose... I am not a fan of BMI. Lots of people use it but it neglects two vital elements 1. build size (are you narrow or broad shouldered?) and 2. muscle to fat ratio. If you put a bodybuilder through a BMI formula he could come out as overweight even though he has a lower fat percentage than any of us would dream of.

So, forget numbers and use the mirror. It is the one thing that does not lie and nothing beats it. This way you can see for yourself, and you wont need to ask others.

Anyway, use the food tips that everyone gave you, but please be active. Make it a part of your daily life and find something you enjoy doing (maybe a sport like soccer - which is phenomenal for losing weight and staying fit).

Good luck

Okay well i wanna lose my tummy fast & i hear that those sauna waist belts help alot & i was wondering if they actually do , i kno it doesnt do all the work & that would have to exercise & diet a lil but is it a good idea ? Ps im really busy so i dont have time to always go to the gym anywho thanks in advance !

To me it never made any sense as to why it should have any substantial positive effects. I actually asked this question to another personal trainer on this site some years ago and he too agreed that it would not work.

Anyway, I did some research and it seems that it is in fact no good. From amongst the many articles I can quote:

"The UK Advertising Standards Authority and the United States FTC are two of the most prominent agencies that cited the Velform Sauna Belt ads for misleading advertising in 2005."

So, you are best off saving your money :)

Please help! So there is this guy I met off a site and he was really nice in person. But , he wanted me to go over to his place the first time we met and I wanted to in public so we did. So then ,after that we talked and stuff. And he started talking about his ex gf died and he wanted to marry her and he kept repeating it and said they had sex the first night and everything. So , he was wondering if I would be just as fast, but I told him no right? So like he said he does not want to wait forever... he says it makes no sense and everything. He kept asking to hang out , but I kept making up excuses...because he seems like he wants sex , but he keeps asking me to come over to his place and cuddle? I mean im the girl shouldn't he be coming to me? is he worth my time? he keeps saying that he really wants us to work and its not the sex that makes love and everything he wants something serious , but i don't know.. he even said he shaved his downstairs for me.... ah and he said if i came over he would half my shirt off in a bra. So I have no idea what I should do?

he also , he tells me im beautiful and he talks to me non stop , but is it a scam?

Thank you betty!

To be honest this kind of creeped me out. I am curious to see what others make of this, but to me he sounds like bad company.

I think he is very much after sex. I have no idea if the gf story is true, but its total bs either way. Why on earth should that former relationship have any bearing on yours?

The way I see it, he tried to get you to have sex right away, then he keeps trying to get you over while making sexual references (the shaving etc), and somehow he claims that sex is not what he is after (or not the most important thing). I dont buy it.

Oh right, and he warned you he wont wait forever after you told him it wouldn't be right away.

No, this guy is bad news in my opinion. I think you should consider staying away.

I am very confused about guys (hence the title) and I found myself asking me a few questions. See, I like my best friend, whom I'm not sure likes me back. I've like him for 2 years. But a few select times, I find myself thinking about another guy as well. And I find out that I have a small crush on another guy, as well as really liking my best friend. Am I some kind of whore? Is it because my best friend might not like me? Is it because I want a boyfriend? I'm so confused!!

It is perfectly possible to like more than one person at one time. That does not make you a whore (or anything even remotely close to that concept).

Another thing, remember we are not judged on our thoughts, we are judged on our actions.

Now, its possible you want a boyfriend, but thats not neccessarily the reason you like two guys. Certainly thought, if one carries a crush around for very long without anything happening it is natural to start looking around.

I wouldn't worry about it, but it might be an idea to start figuring out what you want to do in relation to your best friend.

15f
I have a HUGE crush on this guy but he's gay is it possible to turn a gay guy staight and if so how?

I agree. Its about as likely to turn a gay guy straight as to make a straight guy go gay. Its really only possible if the original condition was an act (or if he is bisexual as mentioned below).

The best bet by far is to save yourself some heartache and try to move on as quickly as you can.

Does dieting stunt growth?

It can if it is done improperly or used for the wrong goals i.e. if one does not get the nutrients one needs; if one uses starvation diets; or if one generally goes too far (i.e. trying to reach some standard that goes beyond actually being overweight).

But, if a child is actually overweight its perfectly fine to use a moderate and sensible diet and exercise program.

So Im trying to stay a virgin. The guys I dated in high school did not really have a problem with it. We would fool around a lot and I made sure he was happy :)

Well I started college this year and I met a few boys who I of course made out with and Ill admit, even did a little more. Usually when I meet a boy, we will make out and if we have been kissing for a bit, Ill let him grab and suck my tits. I dont do this in public just if we are like in his room or something and no one is gonna walk in. I have really big tits and I just dont wear a bra so its really easy for him to get to them. Most of the time, the guy Im making out with will finger me and play with me and Ill come and it usually ends there.

This is pretty much what happened with this guy Ill call David. We met at a party and we started talking and soon we were making out. One thing lead to another and yeah...it didnt go farther than him touching me down there that night. He called me later and asked me to come over but I didnt want him to think of me in just a sexual way so I said no. He then asked if I wanted to go to dinner. We had a great night and I ended up giving him head which he said was the best head in his life. And he said a lot of girls have done that before to him.

At first I was really happy but now Im like oh my god...how can I compete with all those other girls. I told him Im a virgin and he said that he respected that. For a month now Ive been crazy paranoid. I really like him and dont want him to see other girls just cuz I wont have sex with him so I see him like every day and give him head or do whatever he wants. I try to keep it interesting with like ice cubes and strip teases and lingerie.

Hes been asking me if he could just rub the tip of his dick against me and I said yes. Weve been doing that a lot recently and one time he accidentally put the tip of his penis a little too far. It actually felt really good and now Im wondering if Im ready for sex. He said that wasnt sex and he has been doing it like every time we meet. Hes never come inside me which is how I know its not sex but he said it feels really good and it does feel good when he is in there. Should I just have sex with him?

I have to be honest with you, I am not really getting this kind of definition of "virgin". Certainly, ejaculation inside a woman is not the way its defined, by any standard. You can have sex and pull out and the girl is certainly not a virgin.

Second, I dont get the benefit of being a "virgin" that does everything else with guys except vaginal sex. This is of course up to you, and I am am not criticising your choice, but I find it hard to understand.

The reason I mention this is that a guy can still lie and say he does not like you just in a sexual way just to get all other other "benefits". Its not exactly denying him all that much.

Now, onto more concrete advice. First I am worried about the way you think about guys and sex. The way you phrase things, sex is something one keeps guys with, and that one competes with other girls with. And yet sex should not be the foundation of a long lasting relationship (no matter how good it is).

Its going about it backwards a bit in my opinion and it could lead to heartbreak. The decision to have sex should come from you and not from a fear of losing some guy. It should be because its the right time for you, and this is the right person ("right" defined according to your principles on sex).

So, sit yourself down and ask yourself exactly what you want. What does sex mean to you? Why is being a virgin important? How serious do you think your relationship to this guy can become? Keep the questions open (as in not yes or no) and inquisitive. And once you have your version of the answer, do not compromise because of insecurity or fear of losing someone.

I know this wasnt exactly what you were after, but at least you have a guy's perspective. Hopefully others who are better at this will have a go after me :)

Best of luck.

i'm 18/f, i weigh about 150 pounds. my ideal weight is around 135, is there any specific exercises i should do to get down to the target weight? i am a little overweight.
i have love handles, and was wondering if there was a workout technique i could use to get rid of them or make them smaller.
i also have a bunch of excess tummy fat, i heard somewhere that crunches and situps werent good for it, is that true?
basically, i just want to tone up my body, and i need help with what exercises i should do...
anything would be appreciated! thanks in advance,
gina

Peeps's answer is very good. I just wanted to add a couple of things.

First, cardio is very important. It is a great way to burn calories and it has so many health benefits that it would take forever to list here (though the benefits to your heart's health deserve a mention). So please, incorporate at least 20 minutes steady pace cardio into your routine. This could anything like biking, running, walking (depending on your fitness level), etc, done at a pace where you can just carry out a conversation. 20 minutes at least 3 times a week is the minimum which will give you many of the health benefits.

Now, in regards to exercises. I would recommend going to a gym, both for the equipment and the motivation. As mentioned below, you cannot target fat loss, but resistance training preserves muscle mass during weight loss, which is very important to keep your metabolism from going down. Train as much of your body as you can (ideally a full body routine).

Try to train opposing muscle groups... e.g. if you do crunches, train your lower back also. Not doing so can lead to posture problems later in life (which in turn can lead to back problems, etc.).

You can find a big list of exercises here:

http://www.bodybuilding.com/exercises/

The best is to stick to multiple joint movements that involve more than one muscle group. You can also find home workout routines on youtube with just a few creative searches :)

Good luck.

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