about

I'm Christina, and I'm 27. I tend to be brutally honest when I give advice or an opinion. I don't tell people what they want to hear but rather what they need to hear. They don't always appreciate it at first, but I usually get a thank you in the end.


I have 15 tattoos, and 8 piercings. I'm married and just gave birth to a baby boy in May. I'm currently a SAHM so you can find me taking care of my son and binge-watching television while he naps.

advice

Like it sucks. I just lost all my friends. My family always yells at me. I hate it. I'm so sick of it, its the same thing over and over agian. My life is also really boring. I do the same thing everyday. I want to go to bording school to get a fresh start but my mom just starts crying and is like i can't loose you, but then why does she treat me like shit? what can i do to make my life better?

14/f

I had your same problem. Whenever something went wrong in my house, I was always to blame. Whether something was missing, or dirty, I did it.

I moved out the second I turned 18. I spent my birthday with my mother, and then the next day I flew 2000 miles to California & have been living here ever since. My mom was very much like yours.

Just because your parents yell at you all the time doesn't mean they don't love you. Parents get really irritable at work and sometimes take their frustrations out on their children & don't exactly realize what they're doing to you guys.

I think you should talk to your parents. Ask them what you're doing wrong that makes them yell at you so much. I'm sure they'll have an answer. Tell them how they make you feel and maybe things will change. :) Now that I've moved out, my relationship with my parents has changed completely. I actually call them everyday & we talk for a while without being hostile towards each other like when I lived there.

As for the whole friend thing, I don't know what happened because you didn't say. If your friends stopped talking to you, then you shouldn't be friends with them anyways. If it was something different, then you need to talk it out with them.

I wouldn't worry too much. When a door closes, another one opens. Life will always get better even when it seems like it won't. Trust me.

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i've always been a really shy and quiet person. people who don't even know me think i'm weird because of it, am i? i'm not unfriendly or antisocial, i talk when people talk to me, i'm just not always the first one to speak up. i'm not very confident but when you get to know me i open up to people. i'm afraid of how other people percieve me and it makes me shy sometimes. is there something wrong with me? am i weird because of this? or is it their problem if they don't like me?

I don't think you're weird. You're just quiet and shy. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that.

If they don't like you just because you're quiet, then you shouldn't want to be friends with them anyways. But honestly, don't worry about anything that people say or think about you.

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Are they legit? Is anybody or does anybody know a mystery shopper? Any websites that are legit? Any info. welcomed!

I haven't found any that are very legit. I was actually scammed by applying for one on craigslist. I love shopping and saw an ad that they were looking so I applied. I researched it and what was happening to me had happened to other people and it was almost pretty exact to my situation.

I'm pretty sure there are some that legit, but just be careful about where you apply because some places are a scam & could get you into trouble.

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I am so frustrated because I hate my school beyond belief. The rules are ridiculous, the administration is always up your as*, & I'm having friend issues.
My mom won't allow me to switch, though, because of a bunch of reasons. I keep telling her how unhappy I am at this school, with these people, but she says I need to cope.
What should I do?

Your mother is right. If everyone was allowed to switch schools because of rules, and friend issues, there'd be no one in school. Everyone will come across problems like these no matter what school they go to. Every school you go to, issues will follow.

You need to learn to cope. Talk things out with your friends, follow the rules (no matter how ridiculous) & respect the administration. There's nothing else you can do. You cannot switch just because you don't like the environment. Where your district says you go is where you go.

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how can you tell if a place is sanitary/safe or not? if i go to a city and some bustling street the shop must be okay, right?

You can tell just by looking around when you walk in. If their materials are packaged & unopened, then they're clean. If they're stuff is sitting out & or taking a bath in a glass of rubbing alcohol, then leave. You can also ask them about the procedures they take.

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i thinkin about tellin my bestfriend that i was datting her boyfriend wen she was datting him becuz she got me real mad so i asked him &he sed yes but then they broke up but we did to wat should i do???

Be honest with your friend and correct your personality.

You don't date your best friend's boyfriend while he's dating her or even after he's dated her. That's gross, immoral & bitchy.

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Are there any websites that show an example of each ethnicity or whatever? Like an example of what a typical German/French/Irish person would look like. I've been looking forever and can't find anything like this.

There is no typical look for any ethnicity. People of German ethnicity all look different, same goes for any other ethnicity. Nobody looks the same. The reason you can't find a typical look for a race is because there isn't one.

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anyone know any clothing sites with fairly cheap and stylish clothing sites that ship to canada?
like forever21?

wouls be greatly appricated, thanks. =)

You could try Wet Seal & Charlotte Russe. They have clothes similar to Forever 21. :)

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can i get a job at the age of 14 and where in michigan

The most you can do at 14 anywhere is volunteer work and babysitting. Maybe a library would hire you but until then you'll have to wait until 16 or 17.

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What does the expression "I'm wearing my heart on my sleeve" even mean?

It means that someone is very in touch with their feelings & not afraid or ashamed to show it.

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im in 9th grade, 14 years old, about 100 pounds, and 5'1", and i am COMPLETELY flat-chested. and when i say that, im not exaggerating. i don't just have really small boobs, there's nothing there at all. i have the chest of a seven year old. no one i know is like me, and i feel like im not normal. people say to be patient, but im so afraid ill never get them. is this possible?
p.s.: i've just started my period a little while ago, and all other signs of puberty are there.

You are completely normal. Just because you've started your period already doesn't mean you're going to get boobs.

You'll get them eventually, just wait. You're only 14. Be patient.

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I have a best friend (we've been best friends for a few years now) we always have our moments and she jsut treats me like crap all the time. I can't take it anymore. She doesn't know how to say sorry. She's been with this boyfriend for about 4 months now & he's 6 years older than her and so of course I want to meet him. She acts like its a crime for me wanting to meet him and says I am just being ridiculous when I told her it made me mad and she said you're ridic.!!! and im like wow that hurts and she goes on making fun of me because my feelings got hurt. That was about 2 weeks ago and we talked (fought) tonight and i asked her if I could just call her so we could talk but she kept saying she's on the phone so I asked how about after? she never replied and it pisses me off. Does she not care about this friendship enough to try like I am? I also went out of town 5 months ago and she made me feel like absolute crap for going to visit another friend and being in another friends wedding that she isn't in. I told her to stop being so rude to me and she said oh well and i said you're acting like a brat and she said so?

she takes too much pride and it kills me.

WHAT DO I DO!

Try to talk to her about it. If you can't & she refuses to give you answers, then leave it alone.

I personally don't think you should be friends with her. A friendship (like a relationship with a boyfriend or anybody else) is a two-way street. You both need to work at it. It is not fair of her to make you do all the work. However, if she doesn't want to be in the friendship anymore, it is not fair of you to make her give an effort to something she doesn't care for anymore.

Stop being her friend. If she can't try to be a friend or make effort to fix the problems within the friendship, then you should stop trying too. Do not keep trying to make things work if she is dead weight.

If she's going to act like a brat then treat her like one.

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Help me, please?!?!
I like this boy who I think kinda' likes me, but I don't know how to talk to him!
My friends say,"Just say 'Hi! My name is Makala!', but I just can't. It's too hard!
Please help me!!!!!!!!!!

Is there any way to find out what he likes?

Does he do a sport? Does he act in the school plays? If he does either of those, you can ask about those. Or ask about what type of music he's into.

Start a conversation and when he asks your name just tell him.

It's really not so hard, sweetie. Just be yourself. :) Or maybe you can have a friend who knows him to hint that he should talk to you.

Also, if you MySpace, you can add him to your friends list & talk to him through there. Talking through a computer is easy so if you can build a small relationship there, it could probably make it a lot easier to talk to him at school. :)

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What are some good tattoo ideas? Just a small one, I mean it'd have to have a personal meaning for me.. so any ideas how I should go about picking something like that?

I would probably get it on my wrist.

Any advice or suggestions will be appreciated. thanks!

Hey, I have a tattoo on my wrist & mine is of a question mark. You need to think of things that are important to you. What is important to you though?

Music? Family? Friends? Life? Love?

My tattoo revolves on my life when I was younger and with the identity problems I struggled with.

You can go to a tattoo parlor & look through their books. They usually have folders of some sort with either the artists work, OR of pictures of tattoos. They usually sort it through category as well, so that could help too.

If you get a tattoo, please make sure you take care of it well, and that you are careful about where you get it done. Some places can be really gross and disgusting. Also, make sure you tip when you pay them. So the cost of the tattoo + tip!

I recently answered a question on tattoos the other day. Here is the question so you can refer to the information I gave there as well:

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=561419

There you go. :) I hope this helps you. :) Good luck with your tattoo!

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I am always feeling down and blue but I'm always hyper and naturally funny. I neve stop talking. But inside I hate myself and wish I was either dead or someone else.

I cut myself on average twice a month when things get ontop of me

I feel like I have no identity but whenever I ask for help the people around me are so wrapped up in themselves and say stuff like "that's a shame" and my sis just says "yeah well get over it"

I am so stressed and noone cares life is all crap and I might as well just sleep forever

P.S I'm not gonna kill myself so persuasion is not needed

Any advice ?

I used to cut for 5 years, so maybe I can help.

You need to see a therapist. If you cannot afford one, talk the counselor at your school. They are there to help with stuff like this, and they can refer you to places that could possibly help for free. That's what the counselor at my high school did for me (though I was stupid & never went).

Could you possibly talk to a parent? I know you probably think your parents don't care & they'll tell you it's not a big deal, but maybe your parents will listen. If you tell them, they can try to help you. You parents love you & want you happy. They'll do what they can to make sure that you are.

If you want to talk with me, you can e-mail me. My e-mail address is on my column. I check it daily, so you can always ask & I am free to help you whether it be here, through e-mail or even through MySpace. :)

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what are some ways to get someones trust back??? i just lost it and i need to get it back.

Trust is REALLY hard to get back once you lose it, and it sometimes isn't possible.

You need to ask the person what you can do to get their trust back. We don't know what you did to lose it, so you need to ask them.

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i am having a little trouble with my friends. it seems like they don't like me anymore. i don't know what happened but all of a sudden they didn't want to hang out and has kinda been ignoring me.
help! what should i do?

Ask them what their problem is and if they don't have a reply or are just being assholes for no reason, then stop being their friend.

If they're going to be mad at you for stupid shit, then you don't need them in your life and they were never your friends to begin with. Plain & simple.

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alright, so here's the deal...
i'm 19, and a guy, single, and recently (7-9 mos. ago) moved to California, i'm not in school, and i haven't been able find a job yet, but im looking, but anyway my problem is i want to get out and meet some people but it doesn't work out, people say im weird, or im strange, but you know, im just being myself, im confident, im really sweet, i want to make friends, and i cant seem to do that....so basically thats my problem if you can understand, if you want me to elaborate or something you can go ahead and email me or look up my myspace, my email is itheck@live.com just search that on MyS and you should see me...
thanks...CK

I'm sort of in the same situation.

I just moved to CA in February and I live with my boyfriend. I can't go to school until fall and finding a job here is really hard, so I don't blame you on that one.

As far as finding friends though..I think it's just the people here. As far as I've seen.. People here are a little more pretentious & rude. You really have to go to new places and try to find friends. I can't really say anything about making friends here because I'm not here trying to make any, I guess.

I don't know how exactly I can help you, though I can refer to you to a columnist who can.

Check out Uberlou. He might be able to help.

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Hi guys ATTENTION!!!

FAKE SPAMS have been going around and trying to get ADVICENATORS.....dont be caught in penpal spam

Young women (pretending to be from west africa like senegal or dakar) will send you emails stating something along the lines of "my father was a millionaire, my mom died and i'm the only one that survived, and now i'm in a refugee camp"
DO NOT BELIEVE THIS.

her email is julietnkaje2007@yahoo.com

here's a website where other people have had similar situations if you wanna check it out, and here's the email i got and decided to check up on.


http://www.419scam.org/419-penpal.htm


this is what she sent me
""HI
My name is Juliet nkaje ,i saw your profile today in (www.advicenators.com) and became intrested in you,i will also like to know you more,and i want you to send an email to my email address so i can give you my picture for you to know whom i am.
Here is my email address (julietnkaje2007@yahoo.com)
I believe we can move from here!
I am waiting for your mail to my email address above..
(Remeber the distance or colour does not matter but love matters alot in life) yours "

and again :

"My dear,
Am happy in your reply to my mail. How is your day over there in your country i hope you are fine? My name is Juliet nkaje ( 24 ) single and never married, i am 5.6 height 49 wight, fair in compilation nice looking understanding and sincere young girl.i am from Liberia in west Africa but presently i am residing in refugee camp here in Dakar Senegal,as a result of the civil war that was fought in my country then i found my self in UN refugee camp and i am writing you with the hope that you be a help hand to me over my situation.

My late father Mr Morgan nkaje was the one in charge of the diamond sales in Government in monrovia the capital of Liberia and he is also the personal advice to the former head of state before the rebels attacked our house one early morning and killing my mother and my father,

It was only me that is alive now and i managed to make my way to near by country Senegal where i am living now as a refugee under UN refugee camp in Senegal so .I will like to know more about you. Your likes and dislike,your hobbies and what you are doing presently you work all about you as. I will tell you more about myself in my next mail . Attached here is my picture and i will like to see your picture too, Hoping to hear from you
Yours Juliet"

My boyfriend got that e-mail. It pissed me off. He deleted it though. Thanks for the warning.

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ok well here it goes,
right my sister helen wants to have my room and i have hers
but she made a rule : im aloud in it anytime to do anything i want.
but it's only fro her college work or school work
So what do you say i should do!?

She wants to switch rooms?

Uhm, I guess if you don't want to switch with her, then don't. Why should you have to switch if you don't want to? That doesn't seem fair, especially if she isn't gonna be using it much.

And that whole "allowed to be in anytime to do anything" is a lie. She just tried to butter you up to let you use her room probably.

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