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I'm a 17 year old girl who has had her share of problems. So I'll do my best to answer questions and you can leave a question anytime in my inbox. :)
Gender: Female
Age: 17
Member Since: October 31, 2010
Answers: 211
Last Update: January 5, 2012
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bewise
so i just met this boy and i am really infatuated with him.

we hav been texting nonstop for a couple of days and today he didnt text me ONCE

im so upset.
clearly if he liked me he would of texted me or something

y am i not on his mind??

(link)
Just because you're not talking to him doesn't mean you're not on his mind.
You don't want to seem like you always need to talk to him. Plus him not texting you is obviously keeping him on your mind.
So yeah, it doesn't mean that he doesn't like you just because you guys didn't text today.


17/f

I don't know why I feel guilty towards my dad today. Today is his birthday and I yelled at him, because I bought him this blu-ray DVD he's been wanting to play in his blu-ray DVD player. When he got it, he told me he didn't want it anymore and to go return it. I was angry, so I just yelled. I know it was wrong of me, I felt guilty afterwards because he came into my room and gave me green grapes, which is what I said what I wanted for my birthday, which was 3 days after his. I gave him some of my red velvet cupcake. He's not angry anymore, but I still feel really guilty. Maybe also because when I'm 18 years old, my mom and him are divorcing because so none of them would have to pay for child support, but not just that. My dad wouldn't be receiving anymore government money to take care of me. The social security is going to start putting money in my bank directly, so my dad is leaving the house after my parents divorce. I feel terrible, literally. I don't know what to do.

Help?? (link)
It was fine to be mad and you obviously know yelling at him wasn't the best thing to do.
My dad is the same way. For Christmas my mom got my dad something he said he wanted but he changed his mind and they had to go return it. I was mad too.
Anyway, it's fine to feel guilty. It's normal and now you learned that if something ever comes up like this again, you can handle it differently.
You and your dad are fine now so just put it in the past and go on. It'll be fine.


My former best friend is a boy. He was the only one who could understand me. Now that we're not friends anymore, I'm confused. I'm jealous when he's with other girls, and I feel crumpled when he's laughing with others, not me. When I see him, my heart pounds and I feel happy. Do I love him or not? I'm so confused! (link)
Well you might just like him a lot. Love is completely different and when you know you love him, you know and you won't usually question it. Anyway, it's obvious you do like him a lot and may love him as a person but not that whole in love kind of thing.


I have known my friend "Ryan" since I was 9 and recently found out that he likes me. I should have known because he is always trying to touch me or look into my shirt. He knows I have a boyfriend though. My boyfriend, "John", is somone I have known for three years and have been with for almost a year. I like him very much. Ryan knows I am with John but persists in trying to get me to like him. I really don't know what to do because I don't want to hurt either. what should I try? I have told Ryan how I feel but he just laughed and then grabbed my butt. Please help. (link)
Wow Ryan is a jerk. I can't stand when guys do that and think they can just touch girls like that anytime.
So anyway, you need to tell Ryan to seriously stop because you don't see him that way and you actually do care about your boyfriend. If he doesn't stop, you shouldn't be his friend.
He seems like the kind of guy who is all over your body, if you get what I mean. He would be one of those guys that would use you and hurt you. I don't know him but you know, the way people act.
Well just tell him again, and make sure you seem completely serious. If he doesn't stop, don't hang around him anymore. Good luck!


My girlfriend and i are both 16 and well im not sure abou the relationship anymore she keeps saying she wants to have sex shes not a virgin i am shes starting to pressure me for sex and well i dont think im ready im not sure shes the right girl and im not ready to get serious with anyone yet i want to wait i think im too young to have sex that might sound strange but anything can happen she thinks im a prude im not sure if i want to be with here anymore what do you think?
i dont think im ready i want to wait till im older theres nothing wrong with that is there? (link)
You should definitely wait till you're older. There isn't anything wrong with that and you really don't want to be with a girl who thinks you're prude, you're not, you have higher standards than she does.
You're not gonna be happy if you stay with her because she's gonna keep pressuring you, so I don't think you should be with her anymore. You'll be so much happier with someone else who actually wants to wait with you. Good luck!


Okay, so my friend found out that the guy i like does like me. The problem is i am 15 and he turns 19 on saturday. 2nd problem... he has a child who turns two in October. I have posted a question about this before a few days ago. But now i have decided i want to try to see if him and i can make this go somewhere. BUT, my mother and I are having serious trust issues with me. She does not want me hanging out with dirtbags, and i told her i did and she flipped. But i want to know how i can tell her that he is 19 and has a child. My mother got pregnant at 16 with my older brother so i want to think of a way to make it sound decently okay. I know it really is not but I want to try it. Does anyone have any kind of way that i can tell her this in the nicest, mature , understanding way? I would HIGHLY appreciate it! Thank you so MUCH!! (link)
I don't really think it would be a good idea. He might be sweet and all that but he still has a kid and you're just gonna end up having so much drama. The age isn't so much the problem, it's just that he has a kid.
I think no matter what you tell your mom she won't be happy about it. Even though she had a child at 16, I don't know if she regretted it or not, but I don't think she would want you to deal with the same thing.
I don't know if you would even want anything really serious with him either. If you do, I wouldn't find him that great to be with for a future because he doesn't even have a job. If you think about it, he has a lot of problems of his own and I don't think you'd want to be brought into it.

If you still really want to talk to your mom about it, just be calm and expect her to not be your way or go along with it. Good luck


So last night I was at a dance it was kinda boring but the my group went to dinner and around ten I decided to text the guy I liked who said he couldn't come to the dance bc he switched schools like a week before the dance and so I went some other guy but I couldn't stop thinking about the guy I liked so I texted him and the whole night no response and I felt stupid now this morning I wake up and it says he texted me back at 2 am well I fell asleep at one so now I feel even more stupid what and when should I text him bc last time a while ago I texted him back in the morning around 12 and he didn't respond after that should I wait till tonight or what? (link)
I do this all the time with the guy I like. I never know when I should text him or if I should text him. Anyway, I would text him and take that chance. It's fine if he doesn't respond, just think that he's busy or something. He didn't totally blow you off that night anyway because he didn't ignore your text. So just text him and if he doesn't end up texting back, wait till the next time he texts you. Good luck!


17/f

Hi- this is kind of the opposite of a normal relationship question. Basically, there's this guy who likes me at school. He gets sort of tongue tied when I'm around and my friends say he likes me, and that he'll try to ask me out soon. The problem is, I'm actually not interested in dating. This guy is great in a lot of ways but I've never been on a date and I'm just not interested atm. how do I say no if he asks me out, without hurting his feelings? (link)
If he does ask, just tell him you don't want to date anyone at the moment. He's gonna be disappointed either way but saying you don't want to date anyone will help a little and won't hurt him too bad. You'll be fine :)


Me and my boyfriend of a year and a half have been going through a really rough time in our relationship. We have been trying to take some time apart in hopes that it will help. Unfortunetly it has done the exact opposite because he has been thinking that i am going around with some other guy. I haven't though, i have barely left my house. And now I have permanently destroyed the relationship i think because I completely freaked out and lost it. i told him that i did sleep with some one even though i didnt. i dont know why i even said that to him but now i dont know what to do. Is there anything at this point that i can even do? (link)
Be honest with him. From what I have seen, most relationships get destroyed because of lies. It won't work if he's not honest with you and you're not honest with him.
It might not work out between you guys but at least tell him the truth. He'll probably be upset whether he believes you or not so be ready for that and don't expect much to come out of it.
Good luck!


Okay i am 15 years old and am a female. And i was hanging out with my friends and i met my friends friend Donny. He turns 19 next week. He has a son who turns 2 in october. i've hung out with him starting back a few months ago. But i do like him. Which i know is really bad...but no one can help feelings. And my bestfriend is trying to figure out if he likes me back...everyone thinks him and i would be cute together but there is many faults.. age for one. 2. the son. 3. some of the friends we share i am not aloud to hangout with. 4. he has some issues at home. but i cant help but be attracted to him. I just want to hear peoples opinions on how you guys think this would work out. Should i go for it, or should i drop it? (link)
It wouldn't have been too bad if he didn't have a kid. You don't want to get involved with a guy who is 19 and has a son. You're 15 and it's just gonna be a lot harder for you. It's ok to be attracted to him but I would just keep it at that because I don't think it would work out and it would just cause more problems.


A while ago, I told my friend about a crush that I had. Since I was afraid that she would freak out, I told her that I didnt like him any more but I do. Now I learned that she likes him a little too!!! I even just had a dream about him. Should I tell her that I still like him a lot or let her have him? (link)
I would tell her how you feel about him. If she was a good friend, she wouldn't flip out on you or get extremely mad.
Neither of you need to have him, but if she really wants him that bad, I'd let her have him and try to get over him because you don't want to lose a friend over a boy. Friends are way better than boys.
So just tell her and try working something out. Good luck!


i am very under age for sex but i cant wait to have it. i also cant wait to have a shower with my bf and btw how old do u have yo be to do that. i have tryed masterbating but is there a way to do it without putting anything in you??
btw im a female and im 12 (link)
You definitely need to wait. It might sound like fun and all that but there are always consequences to it and you don't want to get all caught up in that, especially at the age of 12.
I'd wait till you are way older to have sex. You might want it now but you will end up regretting it and just might end up feeling used, and trust me, it's a horrible feeling.
It has an emotional impact on you too so being 12, it would probably drive you up a wall and you'd regret it so much.
Plus, if you and your boyfriend have sex, that's probably all he's gonna want from you. So just wait it out.


okay so I have been dating this guy for the past three months and I recently found out he was cheating on me! He told the girl he made out with that he was single and that I was just his friend! I found this out cause i incidentally talked to the girl.I really got angry when I found out he had been lying to me all this while and I immediately broke up with him. when i confronted him about the whole thing he had to accept it but then for the first five hours after confrontation he was all like "i cant believe i could lie so well.." but after that he said sorry and kept on texting and calling me up! he wanted me back and told me he was very sorry and all and he actually spoke to some of his friends (who i know too) about the whole thing and how he really feels sorry about everything. he told some of our mutual friends to call me up too ..should i trust him again and go back to him or not???? (link)
I wouldn't go back to him. What if he finds another girl he's into and says that you're just his friend and he ends up hooking up with her or something? I don't think there is any way you could fully trust him again. You could always try to, but you will always have doubts in the back of your mind wondering if he is faithful to you or not.
He might be sorry but if you didn't find out and didn't break up with him, would he have regretted it? Maybe he's just sorry that you found out.
Anyway, I think you should find someone better who won't cheat on you and won't hurt you like that. You obviously deserve better. Good luck!


My friend (i'm just gonna call him "Stuart") found out that I liked him. He then comes up to me after school, saying that he found out, and that he and this girl went to our school dance and like each other soooooo much and that they were going to go out again that week (which I believe he only likes her because she was the only one that showed open interest in him). After that, he didn't talk to me. Then, a few days later, the first words that come out of his words to my face are that they had a great time at the movie theatre, and that the following week they were going to enjoy some "other" activities at the movies (again). Then today he comes up to me, bragging about their first kiss last night. What the hell is his problem? Does he have a large stick up his ass, or something?? He only started acting this way since his girlfriend told him about my feelings for him. (link)
He does sound like a jerk. I think he's just trying to make you jealous so I'd just not react to it and try to stay away from him or something. He's just being stupid.


16/f
it's going to be valentines day and one of my close friends wants to spend the day together. the thing is i don't really feel like spending time with her. on friday she made a very rude comment towards me, i just laughed it off. She's not the type of person you can talk to about how she makes you feel, it will just create an argument. I also recently stopped smoking weed in order to get myself together and she expects me to smoke with her every time we're together.
pros of going tomorrow:
-i might get to see the guy i like because whenever i hang out with my friend we usually invite him over since he lives close
- i get to get out of the house (very stressful house situation)

cons:
-i waste my money (i always pay for everything with her)
-part of me will feel miserable being with her
should i go? if so what should we do? any other opinions will be highly appreciated. (link)
I wouldn't hang out with her. You'll be miserable if you stay home but also with her. I'd find something else to do to get out of the house. Even a guy wouldn't be worth feeling miserable. Try finding some other way to hang out with him. Well, I wouldn't go but it's all up to you and how you feel about it. Good luck!


I'll try to keep it short. One day, I was playing games on my boyfriend's phone when I noticed a series of texts from this girl (we have tons of mutual friends so I was wondering why I didn't know this girl). I went through the texts and I didn't like what I saw. Texts like "smart is sexy", "hanky panky is a fun exercise ;)", etc. were in there and I got really angry. I confronted him about it, but he didn't seem concerned at all. He casually mentioned he's known this girl for a while and they've always joked around like that and it wasn't a huge deal. I'm old fashioned and I see it as a mild form of cheating. Am I overreacting or should I be worried? Thanks so much guys in advance. (link)
I don't think you're overreacting. If I was in your place, that would cause me to have some real trust issues with him.

He might not have done anything with her, so he might not have felt guilty. He might have but you have no idea so your mind just wanders. So you need to talk to him about it and tell him how you feel.

If he thinks you're overreacting then I don't think you would want to be with him. I would get that you wouldn't want to break up with him but you don't want to be with someone while you're always thinking about what is happening and if you could trust him. Just talk to him and see where that goes. Don't get angry and be calm about it. Good luck!


I started to realize my friend who I became friends with at the beginning of the school year is a complete loser. She looks like she has a mustache and she doesn't use common sense. She's really ugly, annoying, and hangs out with complete losers.
One of my friends dumped me last year because of popularity and I wasn't popular, I'm not popular, I probably never will be, but I will be considered a 'cool geek'.
Okay here is why I don't want to be her friend:
~She has a mustache and wears boots every day, not cute boots but horse riding boots or what looks like those kinds of boots.
~She has a mustache
~She went out with a complete loser
~She doesn't use common sense
~Is friends with other losers, one of which looks like a hippy
~She calls me her 'gym buddy'
~SHE WATCHES SOAP OPERAS(and in seventh grade)
~She doesn't have a facebook, cell phone, or email.
So how do I dump her without hurting her feelings? I've been kind of ignoring her lately. . .why should I do?!! Also all of he losers I mentioned are losers according to everyone except heir 'friends'. Oh and we are in seventh grade 13 years old she is 12 though. (link)
No offense but you're gonna end up being one of those stuck up girls that nobody likes if you keep this kind of stuff up.

She might not wear the cutest clothes or be the prettiest girl but you don't need to judge someone because of what she looks like or what other people say about her.
If those are the reasons why you don't want to be her friend, then you have some stuff to figure out.
Popularity isn't everything.

You said one of your friend dumped you because you weren't popular. You wouldn't want those kinds of friends. Why would you want to be that way towards someone else?


Me and my boyfriend have been friends since 3rd grade and we started dating since 8th grade we are about to graduate high school and he wants to get married. We both have refused to have sex with each other because we do not wanna risk are relationship with a baby . I really don't know what's best for him and for us . if you were me and you didn't Want anyone else what would you do . (link)
That's so good that you guys waited. I'd keep waiting because sex can really ruin a relationship. So I'd keep up with it the way it is now.

I also wouldn't get married right after high school. I've seen so many problems when that happens. Not that it couldn't work but you learn so much about that person that you didn't realize. You're still young and everything so I'd just keep going with it.

My boyfriend talked to be about the same thing. He wanted to marry after we graduated. I wanted to wait till I was in my 20s, after college so that we could actually afford everything and I know getting married right after high school has a higher divorce rate. Anyway, not saying it would happen to you but lots of things happen.

You two aren't too young for love but I wouldn't rush into things right after you guys graduate.
Good luck!


13, female
So there's a guy... He's 16 and he doesn't have a girlfriend. I think he's really cute. We see eachother at parties and there was a party yesterday, and of course there was music, so we danced together to bachata. It was nice, but I guess I should've talked to him more while we were so close together. It could've been the perfect time to talk to him.(NOTE: he doesn't make fun of me or anything like that.) One thing I don't get is that he flirts with me once in a while even though he doesn't have feelings for me.

Anyways, I know he doesn't like me, but I really want to tell him that I like him, just so he knows and so I don't have to be so sneaky all the time. Should I tell him? How do I tell him?

Thank you to everyone who answers! Even if you think your answer won't help, please write it down there! (link)
Well I wouldn't tell him how you feel if he doesn't feel the same. But this is all up to you. If you do want to tell him how you feel, go ahead. I would try talking and flirting with him more. You never know what could happen. Anyway, this is all up to you and I'm sure everything will be fine. Good luck!


We'll I had a bad childhood an I've seen alot of stuff a kid shouldn't. See and I have really bad flash backs of things and it seems to make me very paranoid what do I do PLEASE help i also have anexiety (link)
You need to go talk to someone. An adult you trust or a counselor. They'll help you get the help you need. That is probably the best thing you can do right now. Good luck!




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