kristen22's

advice

Hi. I work in a drop in centre for people with mental and physical disabilities. Recently we hired a new girl to work in a seperate job employment program, funded by the centre, but not really being involved with it. My own employer, before she left for her maternity leave, made it clear that I was in charge of the drop in program.

However- this person does not have anyone to work with in her own program, and apparantly has decided to horn in on mine. When I am working with the members, she buts in, telling them what to do and how to do it. Several times she has forced people (who may not be willing/may be unable) to do work like washing dishes. Once she was incredibly pushy towards a person who was suffering a petite mal seizure.

I don't want to have to deal with further strained relationships with my coworker. Already I feel resentful and threatened by her, mainly because she is two years younger, fresh out of college, and is one of those super-perky-isn't-my-life-wonderful-compared-to-yours kinds of people. How do I politely assert my authority without offending her?

(Feedback given!)

I wouldn't give two shits if she was offended or not. You were left in charge beacuse your "boss" felt like you were the best person for that job-now you can do your job 100% if you got a know-it-all that actually knows-nothing trying to do your job for you. Let her know Katie, the advice your giving is NOT in the best interest of our client, I'd appreciate it if from now on, you'd let me do my job. That should shut her up, and if not...then it's time to get ugly.

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I have a friend who is straight. I'm gay. We are in our low 30s. When I told him that I have very strong feelings for him, he was totally uninterested. Not only that,
but he told me that he was very disappointed in me for telling him that. (That I have feelings towards him in such a way.) My major problem is that I obsess about him. I think about him constantly during the day. I dream about him at night. Sometimes many time in one hour, uncontrollably. In sexual and non sexual terms. I think of him in many different ways. I want to know everything there is to know about him, what he does, what he likes, what he spends his time with, etc, etc, etc. My point is, I tried to stop all this thinking and wanting to be close to him, but I can't. I'm in searing mental pain every day because I think of him so much and the interest he has in me at best is being a casual/good friend, my feelings towards him are not mutual. I don't want to get up in the morning because I know what my day in that aspect will be like. I know the reality of the situation but I obsess about him, and I can't stop my thoughts, they just pop into my head without my will or consent. What can I do? Can you help me? Showing him this letter is out. So is going for professional help. As much as I think I might be able to be helped by a psychologist/psychiatrist, the hundreds of dollars of fees that they charge per hour/session is beyond what I can afford. I can barely pay my basic bills, never mind this. I need to be able to have my day, everyday, go by without thinking, dreaming and fantasizing about him. My mind needs to be free of him the way I think of him now in order to keep my sanity, to be a normal person. It has come to a point that I'm in terrible, constant anguish that I think about him 24/7 the way I do, that I can't take it anymore. Please help me! Many thanks for you time. I eagerly await your response, you might just be able to save me before I go absolutely crazy. Thank you.

I would advise you making a appointment to go to Mental Health. (No it's not for crazy people) -It's for people that have trouble coping with a few things and just need someone to talk to. It is farely cheap to go there (you might can even get the state to pay 4 it-mental health can talk to you about that & even if they don't they offer payment plans-there main goal is to help you not get all your money. It's normal to fantasize about a person you know you could never be with-but it ends there. You can no more make a straight person gay than a person can make you go straight. Best Of Luck To You..

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I'm 16 and i lost my virginity to my boyfriend of 3yrs. it was just 3 days ago. we didn't use protection i'm worried i could be pregnant. i wouldn't have done it if i didn't love him. but his phones been cut off. He has a cell phone but hasn't called or anything. Should i be worried or relax?

WHAT SHOULD I DO???

Prime example on waiting to have sex. I do however have to give you props for waiting 3 years I suppose. Moving on to your question.... GIRL! Didn't you know when you layed down to have sex with him that you could get pregnant if he didnt use a condom? It's too soon for you to have any symptoms & it's too soon to take a pregnancy test. Take the test 4 days BEFORE your NEXT period should come. If it comes out positive then you and him have alot of talking to do and if it's negative...then maybe you have learned your lesson about being more careful! 30 minutes of pleasure vs. 9 months of pain.
-Marine Wife

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hey
my name is justin, iam almost 18, actually iam 17 years old plus 7 month.
i live in new york.
i was woundering wats the legal age in the us to have sex, and am i free to buy condoms?
tanx for help, and i really appreciate.
reply soon.
Justin

I've never heard of there being a law that states you have to be a certain age. There is laws against a minor (under 18) having sex with someone that is 18 & older though. There is NO age limit on buying condoms -can tell you that for a fact because I used to work at a grocery store and a convience store and we were told to sell them to ANYONE.
-Marine Wife

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my boyfriend is going to propose to me on christmas (i over heard...oops!) it will then be 7 months we have gone out. Is that bad? I mean it doesnt mean we are gonna get married...

No it's not bad at all. Love has no certain time limit! Me and my husband were together for 6 months when he asked me to marry him, and 6 more months later we were married. His good friend went on a trip and met a girl and they knew each other 3 days when he asked her to marry him (no there not ugly ppl lol) and they've been happily married for 3 years now. When you find that person....you got to hold on to em'. Best of Luck to you both.
-Marine Wife

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28/f

My husband and I have been married now for 7 years. I have an 8 year old son from a previous relationship, whom he has legally adopted.

When my husband was a baby, he had kidney cancer and went through so much chemotherapy and radiation that he is unable to have his own children. (He is perfectly normal and healthy now)

We considered adoption, but my husband has already done that with my son. Plus, I really want to be pregnant.

I know that our only option is to use a donor. I was wondering if anyone out there has been through a similar situtation and could offer us some advice.

Where do we go? How much does it cost? How long does it take? What should we watch out for?

We have already talked to our doctor and he referred us to a place- I just want to know what's out there and talk to someone who has been through it.

Thanks!

I doubt you'll find someone from this site that has been through what you are about to go through. Most people here are teenagers and there are a handful of adults (I'm 24) I haven't been through it, but maybe if nothing else, I can share with you what info I do know on the topic.

Sperm banks often provide special services such as donor consultations (to help you pick a donor), photo matching (if you provide a photo of yourself or partner, they'll try to find a donor with similar appearance) and genetic consultations to help you identify specific genetic/health issues that may be relevant in your case. Typically, these services are billed at an hourly rate.

*PRICES*
Depending from what state you're in the cost charges is usually approximately $1,650 for an ovulation induction cycle. This covers office visits, injection training, and estrogen and ultrasound monitoring throughout the cycle. This does not include sperm washings, intrauterine insemination or medications. I strongly recommend you shop around for the best price. Costs can vary tremendously, even for the same medication. Some insurance will cover some if not all of these procedures. (Blue Cross Blue Shield is a awesome Insurance carrier) If you Insurance doesn't even help cover this sort of thing, My first bet would be to shop around for a insurance carrier that does.


Please take a minute and visit this site. http://www.spermcenter.com/spermdonors.asp
-Marine Wife

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Hey everyone. My world history teacher wants to go to italy for spring break (first 2 weeks of april...yes...we get 2 weeks off) and he wants only about 5 or 6 students to go with him. Well he's obviously got a long time to plan and we'll get more information later...but right now he estimated the trip (for 9 days) to be about $2,500..not too bad right? WRONG if you live in my family! we are in a horrible money situation right now and certainly cant afford it. Heck, I dont think we can afford it when spring break rolls around..so i need a way to make money..enough money to go to italy for spring break. please dont tell me to get a job because i've already considered that and no one (besides mcdonalds) will hire at 15 around here and i'm not about to work at mcdonalds...and even if i did put in for a job...there is no promise i'll get it. So how on earth am i going to make money?? I dont like the basic idea of making and selling food because there is no point in doing it in my neighborhood. So can someone PLEASE help a sister out? I WOULD LOOOOOVE to go to italy! I'm only $2500 away! :) Thanks In Advance To Anyone Who Helps!

Not being harsh or nothin... But, you said please don't tell me to get a job. How else are you going to come up with that kind of money? A lemonade stand at a quarter a piece? Prostitue? Beg strangers for money? Your only option here IS to get a job. Don't just not put in for McDonalds because there is a CHANCE you won't get it. You don't know if you'll get it or not and McDonalds is hiring ALL the time. Like you said April is a ways away and working from now till then, you'll have the money but all these little gimmick ways to make money don't work. If they did, we would all sit at home on the computer and be rollin in the dough. I know your going to rate me a 1 and I'm ok with that because I told you the truth, not what you wanted to hear.
-Marine Wife

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Hey everyone. I really want to do my room in a tropical hawwain kinda theme. I've been to websites like pbteen.com, wakeupfrankie.com and stuff like that. But everything is too expenceive. I want to put effort into buying things but I don't want to spend all of my money on like, 2 things. Please Help!!!! If anyone knows where I can get some cheap (and cute!!!) topical things, please tell me! thanks!!!

I think you can still surf the web for ideas, It will help you get a better idea of what you'd like to do to your room. You can get tropical themed items at Wal-mart & Target..Cheap places like that. The first big transformation would be to paint and border your room. Like if the top half is white, paint the bottom half like a sea-blue or bluish-green and put matching tropical border inbetween the two colors. Here's an example:http://www.themouseforless.com/community/showcase/rooms/Bedroom2.jpg (see the border in the middle-just paint the bottom half a different color) Also, nice pictures of hawaii or beaches would be really cool. A Tropical pattern bedspread would also be cool. You could go to Wal-Mart and go down the sewing isle and get a couple bags of cotton ($1.50 a piece) and some needles & thread and pick out some good beach or hawaiian style fabric and make dozens of throw pillows for your bed that would be a super-cheap idea and it will keep ya' busy. Hope I helped!
-Marine Wife

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Will something happen to your knuckle joints if you pop them?

From one knucle popper-to another...Nah, well... nothin' to important that is. They MIGHT swell a little in cold weather, but that's it. Me & my sister pop our of habit or what-not. Mine swell a little (not enough for anyone else to tell) and my sister's don't at all.

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Hey iam iam not pregant or anything,but iam so fat that one of the people that comes to the school to recruit people for the army when I went up their to help a friend sign up asked me if I was pregnant and then he laughed what can I do to lose weight so that dosn't happen again iam only 17 and iam about 5 foot and weigh 145 lbs what should my normal weight be and how can i lose it fast?

Go figure... Army is fags anyways so don't let that bother you. God that pisses me off!! lol Like 145 pounds is not even fat at all! But, here's the info your askin for:

Calculate your Body-Mass Index
Enter your height in feet: 5 and inches: 0
Enter your weight in pounds: 145
Press the button when you're ready to see your BMI: 28.4

Your result:
By doing this calculation, you will come up with a number that is your BMI. Healthful BMI's are between 19 to 24. If you have a BMI over 24 or under 19, you should see a doctor or a nutritionist to discuss your nutrition and weight.

http://www.teenhealthfx.com/answers/Sports-18.htm
Hope This Helped.
-MARINE WIFE

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I have been on my birth control pill for about two months now and me and my boyfriend have had unprotected sex many times but he doesn't cum inside me he always pulls it out. well my stomach has been hurting alot for like the past two days and today i took a pregnancy test and it was negative. my question is why do you guys thing my stomach has been hurting? yesterday it hurt alot and today it doesnt really hurt that much only when i think about it and then i feel like it is hurting. thank you in advance

Well I'm 24 years old! (LOL)
Ok so, you didn't say if you had a monthly period still with your birth control method or not? Your stomach could be hurting from period cramps. (Even though you might not bleed, your body still goes through that process if you get what I'm sayin') Or could be something minor like a stomach ache. When taking a pregnancy test you need to wait at least 4 days BEFORE your NEXT period to come. So if you don't have periods now, try to think back to when you did..Like say it was on the 15th.. that means the earliest you could take a test would be the 11th of that next month. A pregnancy test, doesn't know if there is actually a fetus in your stomach or not, what it does, is... If you are pregnant it takes about a month before your body starts to produce a hormone called HCG. This is what the test picks up on..if your body has that hormone. So taking a test to early will only give you a false negative even if you are pregnant. I know it sucks having to wait but that's just the way it is. You can get a blood test done at like a Health Department (they won't tell your parents and if your under the age of 18, the state pays for it.) Hope this helps.
-Marine Wife

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What does it feel like when you have a misscarriage?

Do you get a stomache ach then have lots of blood and it have a weird/gross smell?


thanks

It's nothing like a stomach ache or any weird/ gross smells. I'm not sure where you got that info...but it's wrong.
A miscarriage can be different for every woman, including stomach cramps (not a ache feeling), bleeding, sharp almost like being stabbed pains in your stomach.

Some women miscarry and there so EARLY in pregnancy that they didn't even know they were pregnant. It just flushes like a period almost.

The longer you are pregnant, the worser the symptoms for a miscarriage. In that case you have a procedure called a D&C done to (I don't want to get graphic here, so I'll just say "flush out" the fetus and lining.

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I found out yesterday... i have a diseaseon my ovaries. and i might not beable to have kids when i'm older. and it upsets me because it is going to be so hard for me when im older to try to have kids and if i can't have kids. the doctor told me there is a slight slight change i can treat my problem but can't cure it. not alot of people know and i don't want them too. but my question is.. when i'm older do you think having a boyfriend that really wants kids, jeopardize my relationships?

It doesn't have to jeopardize anything. Entering into a relationship, your first off thing to do, would be to let them know that if they want kids, that there is a HUGE possibility that you can't give them that, but that you are open to adoptions (?). By letting him know early on, there won't be any hurt feelings when he tells you he's ready for a kid, then you have to break it to him that you can't give him any. I'm so sorry for this of happened to you. We live in a time where new things are being discovered every day, so it's possible that during the course of your lifetime they could find a cure to treat whatever disorder it is your having that is preventing you from having kids. My heart goes out to you.

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so theres this girl who i like but i dont know if she likes me, she always waves to me and when i called her once after she told me to she said a greeting so quickly that she sounded as if she planned it. what do u think?

She might of planned it lol us girls do things like that. Well, there's not really much to discuss here. She told you to call her, and you did. Know this.. If she didn't like you, there is NOOO way she would of told you to call her, so that's a good thing. Best Of Luck, sorry I couldn't help ya more.

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why isn't it healthy to wash your hair everyday?? i do that and i dont see anything wrong with my hair. i'm just womdering

Yea ppl say not wash your hair everyday because it strips your hair of all the natural oils, thus... damaging it. I have to wash mine everyday or esle I look like a oily-headed ho-bo lol

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Hi , can anyone help!!!!!! I am 17 years old. I have a problem in that I would like to become a Goth/Gothic/ but I am also thinking about going to college /wanting a career working with horses. But how is this possible? Can Goths get jobs working with horses? Can i work with horses and still be a Goth realistically?? PLEASE HELP!!!! it's just I desperately want to do both! It's just I have NEVER EVER in my life SEEN ANYONE who is a Goth/gothic who works in a stable yard. Also the hours working with horses are long....so how can i be a Goth in my spare time ..if I don't have much spare time? But I really want to do both...WHAT CAN I DO?? help!!!! Also I was also considering a career as an actress. I would quite like to go to college do study 'performing Arts' but again:.....can I be a Goth AND an actress...because I don't think I have EVER seen a Goth actress.Do you know of any famous actors/actresses who are also Goths/gothic/follow the gothic lifestyle??? What can I do?? I haven't decided whether I want to work with horses or go into performing Arts yet.....but whatever I do I would also like to become a Goth/gothic. Can I still become a Goth if i get a job as an actress or with horses??? Please can anyone out there offer me any advice???? PLEASE HELP!!!!! Do you know of any people who either work with horses or who are actors/actresses but who are also goths?? HELP? CAN I BECOME A GOTH AND WORK WITH HORSES/AS AN ACTRESS??? please be realistic.
I am from England

Goths tend to be passive, accepting, laid back and passive.

•Many Goths have a fascination with death.

“There's no Grand Gothic Judge to decree what is truly Goth and what is not, although there are plenty of people who claim to be it. It's an ambiguous label with many people using it that don't understand what it means. The people who do understand it often have many different definitions.”

Drug use is found in the gothic scene, just as in any teenage group. However, it is not required. Most commonly used drugs within the gothic scene are alcohol, LSD, and tobacco.

For girls, some common Goth looks are:
Fishnet tights
•Pointy toed shoes, combat boots, high heels, heeled boots…
•Piercing or tattoos
•Cleavage-enhancing corset top with long flowing skirts
•Crushed velvet dress with heels or boots
•Bondage Gear, spikes or studs
•Ratted up Hair, red or black lipstick, black makeup for the eyes, pointed angles
•Lingerie that shows
•Dracula Influence/ Death Angel Influence

So, just ask yourself, could you dress in that style & tend to horses? lol. Just be yourself!! I'm not saying don"t be goth... but you shouldn't let an outfit define who you are.
Good Luck.


Some info pulled from:http://www.trinity.edu/mkearl/death02/goth/Goth%20Fashion.htm

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hi, well im not a politics type of guy, so i dont know why george bush and tony blair are hated so much. what have they done thats so bad?

Most American citizens are content whomever is in the Oval office, do their 40 hours at work, take their check and enjoy the weekend. Some Americans are unhappy with the condition of the country. And a select few will do ANYTHING to see that President Bush is removed from office.

I think alot of the reason's he is hated so much is the way he has chosen to run things regarding the war in Iraq. Alot of people believe that they should just pack it up and bring our troops home, partly beacuse it has been such a long time since 9/11.

You take a dollar and bury it, you dig it up ten years later. It's still a dollar right? YES. You take a man that organized a attack on the United States, blowing up the twin towers, killing thousands of people. People that NEVER got to tell there family's bye. They just thought they were going to work. a few years pass, and what it doesn't matter anymore? Of course it matters, and President Bush knows that. That's why the war won't end until Osama is caught or killed.

People that say Bill Clinton did a wonderful job when he was in office are full of shit. First off, there was no war & he didn't have as big a problem as there is now with illegal immigrants. The president before Clinton is the one that set everything up so nice so Clinton would have time to Cheat on his wife and stick cigar's up her uknowwhere.

Hope this helps ya get a better understanding of things.
-Marine Wife.

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i've always wanted to curl my hair. i've always liked girls who curled their hair. the problem is that my hair doesn't easily curl, and it doesn't hold curls well. i've tried using a curling iron and curling first the bottom layer of hair and then the top, but it never looks good.

does anybody have any tips to help me curl my hair better/easier? like can you give me step-by-step instructions on how to curl my hair?

here is a picture of curls that i like:

http://www.ashleytisdale.com/images_pub/pat718.jpg


and what size curling iron would i need to use?

and here is a picture of me, can you please tell me if i will look good with curls, and if you think my hair can curl like that:

http://img224.imageshack.us/img224/4615/aug2506003mc0.jpg

thanks so much! and sorry this was kinda long.

I'm going to school for cosmetology so myabe I can help ya'... Here's a few tips to help your curls lock in.

*Use Aussie INSTANT FREEZE hair spray
*A 1/4 or 1/2 inch barrell would be good to curl your hair with.
*Start from bottom to top. (Clip your hair on top of your head and do in sections, leaving the newly curled part down as you go)
*Spray each section WHILE it is wrapped on the curling iron.
*Do not curl side to side {EX. ----} Curl your hair up to down (just like a spiral curl looks like {/}
*DO OT brush or comb your hair after it is curled.
*Let all the heat go away from your head before you attempt to make it all look good. The longer the curl has heat, the longer it will stay in, and combing or putting your fingers through itas soon as your curl it, takes the heat out faster.
*After all is curled, and all the heat is gone from your hair, spray with INSTANT FREEZE one good time, wait a minute to dry then bring your fingers through it to seperate the curls and bring the look together.
{I know this take's alot of work, but it's worth it in the end} {Good Luck and I know it'll look beautiful!!}

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my pregnant sister is trying to find a unique [maybe exotic] MIDDLE name for her baby girl, so far its between Cache[accent over the e] and chenelle....

the babys name will be Alexis [middle name] Smigelski

does anyone have any suggestions for a middle name?? and please dont say anything like nicole or ashley, NO common stuff

haha sry if im sounding mean but i just would like any suggestions that sound good, you can see our taste in names [chenelle, cache] if that helps so ya thanks, ill rate anyone who at least trys lol

~ xsharpiexlovex

Nevaeh (heaven spelled backwards) {Na-vay-ah}
Makayla
Ava
Hannah
Brianna
August
Breyden
Charisma
Essence
Skye
Laiken
Treanna

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If I look like this..(Im the one on the right)

http://s2.photobucket.com/albums/y7/waioluaiai/?action=view¤t=noo-1.jpg&refPage=&imgAnch=imgAnch1

What are some tips to make me look more like Jessica Simpson? Thanks so much!

You already, are very pretty. I would suggest however, if you wanting to look somewhat like Jessica Simpson, that you dye your hair her shade of blonde, use shampoo & conditioner that made to volumnize your hair and use those heat roller-curler things. Also, gainin about 10 pounds would work, becuase your face is alot skinnier than hers!

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