about




My name's Jennifer, but I'm more commonly known as Jen or Sporkster. I love lots of things/people including God; volleyball and soccer, my two favorite sports; and cheese. I also love Pi, but that's a story for another day.

I've been answering questions on Advicenators for over three years now, so I'm pretty experienced with it. I love answering questions and helping you out anyway I can, so if you've got a question, just ask me!

Ask me about: Christianity, athletics, physical fitness, love-life, relationships, friendships, HTML queries, book suggestions, music suggestions, musical theory, history, English (or Spanish) grammar, Paint Shop Pro 8, skin problems, sports injuries, "punk" fashion, nutrition, etc.

advice

Q: Does anybody know any good sites to get like surveys and quotes for your profile, or live journal? I rate 5's!! THANKS!

A: Best survey site of all time:

http://www.bzoink.com

Have fun!

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Q: Hey. This is gonna be the stupidest question, but I really need help. My brother and his friends (they're all about 23, I'm 16) are doing this movie. It's supposed to be really stupid and pointless, and I'm some kind of princess. But I'm supposed to look really stupid, like with my costume and hair. They've already made the 1st one and they said I can be in the 2nd. Well, I'm supposed to go over his house today and practice, but I think I'm supposed to be in costume. But I have NO IDEA what to wear. If it helps, I have a princess costume from a recent dance recital. It's mostly white, with some yellow. But how do I make it look stupid? Or is there something else I can wear? And what do I do with my hair?! Please help, I don't want to look like I have no idea what I'm doing. I want to look stupid, but I want them to think I know what I'm doing! Please help!!! They think I'm cool, I wish to keep that reputation!

A: For a visible effect of looking stupid, use lots of gaudy makeup--bright blue eyeshadow, visible foundation, lots of blush, bright red lipstick, etc.

Although it would be best just to act out the part, i.e., acting stupid/clueless/oblivious/cheeky. Act like a blonde stereotype. You know, like Jessica Simpson. Stupid, but adorably so.

I'm sure you won't lose your reputation with your friends over something this silly. Just have fun making the movie.

(Oh, and if they ever put it up on the web, send me a link. =] )

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Q: Do you ever smile in pictures? I was checking out your band website and your are such a stone face...

A: I look weird when I smile. =| Also, the pictures on the band site were supposed to be stone-faced--we were trying to parody nowadays emo/punk bands.

Check out my "emo" picture on my Advice Column. Tehe, once again, trying to parody "emo" people.

I've got a few pics of me smiling in my Tucker and I album...as well as my sexy feet.

http://community.webshots.com/user/sporkster

Have fun.

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Q: well first i am 14/f, and anyone makes fun of my question in anyway, i will report you and get you banned. and well people who are willing to help, please help i need help ASAP. my problem is this. i am crushing on a gay guy. i just met him and he first denied that he was, but today he told me and my friend that he is gay. but he is fits so perfect for my dream prince. he likes stuff i like, and such. not to mention he is sooo hot.

so please, is there anyway i can turn him straight? i know it will be really hard and i can't help it because its like hormon, but i have heard of few stories that it can happen. but i dont know how, and please dont say give up, because i know most of you will try to do that but i already know that , but i have to try at least!! so please please help me.

i rate 5 if it helps even a little.

A: You can't just turn someone straight. It doesn't work that way. You're just going to have to find another "dream prince," because it ain't happenin', sister.

You can try all you want to, but unless he's not REALLY gay he's not going to be interested. If he told you he's gay, he's trying to let you know something. Either he's not into you, or he doesn't want you to like him, or both. Take hints.

I hope this helps you in some way.

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Q: ok so i hear if you take test and it comes out positive, there is still a chance it can be wrong and your really not pregnant. i also hear if it comes out negative..it can be inacurate as well and you really could be pregnant..therefore how is taking a pregnancy test a good indicator if your pregnant or not? are you supposed to take like 4 in a row and see whatever answer comes out the most?
little confused
thanks

A: You can be given a false negative, but never a false positive.

So if the pregnancy test comes out negative, take it again to make sure. Take it three times. Or four.

If you're tested positive, test all you want to but you're pregnant.

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Q: i had unprotected sex about 3 days ago. he didn't cum inside me, so i know i'm not pregnant. but could i still have gotten any stds, even though there haven't been any signs so far?

A: Any time you have sex you have a chance of becoming pregnant. Any time. That's why you should NEVER have unprotected sex if you're not trying to conceive. It doesn't matter if he didn't "cum" inside of you. There is pre-ejaculate (or, "pre-cum") that does contains sperm. Always always ALWAYS use some sort of birth control/protection.

If he has been tested for STD's and was tested negative, you have nothing to worry about in that area. If he hasn't been tested, you really don't know. Have him and yourself tested for STD's so you don't have to worry about it.

Remember that the only 100% effective form of birth control is abstinence.

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Q: ii went to a summer camp and met this guy... to keep a long story short, all we did was flirt and spend every min. with each other... we even kissed... ii really liked him... he gave me his number and it turns out he has a girlfriend... to him was it just a fling? please help ! btw im 14/f....

A: Yeah, it was just a fling. Did you ask him about having a girlfriend? Make sure you do that next time.

Guys are jerks like that sometimes. Sucks, huh? You're better off looking for a guy in your area you can keep an eye on/know about a little before you kiss him.

Learn from your mistakes--that's why we make them.

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Q: i am wanting to change my look to a more 'ashlee simpson/punky' look without being called a poseur. i am currently into hollister, american eagle, forever 21, abercrombie, and aeropostale. how can i change my style without being too drastic? please help

A: Why exactly do you want to change your look? Just because it's becoming popular due to Ashlee Simpson? That's asinine.

Wear the clothes you have, don't just go "punk" because it's the in thing to do right now. People like that make me sick, especially when they throw things like "OMG, you're a poser!" and "I'm a REAL punk 'cause I listen to Green Day and dress like Ashlee Simpson, OMG!" around. It's sickening.

I've worn guys shorts, dark colored shirts, and eyeliner my whole life. People used to tell me "Oh, you're such a freak!" all the time. I really didn't care, until the whole "punk" thing started becoming popular and they came up to me asking where I bought my clothes. It's stupid. Just a silly fad.

Next week you'll be wanting to be "gawth."


To sum it all up: Be you, and only you. If you were really "punk," you'd have been wearing "punk" clothes before "punk" became popular.

P.S. Real punk is dead.

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Q: I wear a DD size bra. Like, does that make me fat? And do boys like boobs that r like, DD size? Is it common do wear DD, or is that like wayy huge. Please be serious nd just answer, i'll rate high

A: Having larger breasts doesn't necessarily mean you're fat--there are some relatively skinny people with large breasts.

Not all guys like big breasts. In fact, I know some that think they're gross and look nasty/slutty. Most guys I know don't really like anything bigger than a C. *shrugs* It differs from guy to guy. It depends on how you present yourself. Hopefully, you don't try to flaunt it in a slutty way, because that's just stupid.

Honestly, I don't know many people with breasts that large. There may be a lot of people with that size, but I don't know many myself.

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Q: Are kilocalories and calories the same thing?

A: Yes. A Calorie (with a capital C) is equivalent to one kilocalorie, or one thousand calories.

I can't remember if that's exactly right, but I do know that one Calorie is made up of one thousand smaller units called calories (or kalories?).

Make sure you check on WebMD or some other related site to see if that's right, as I'm not entirely sure.

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Q:
I have this friend who likes me but I like another girl. I want her to know that without her felling bad so can you help?

from Pola_Bear

A: Well, you have to be completely honest with your friend no matter what. It hurts to be let down, I'm sure, but it hurts even worse to lead someone on.

One of my guy friends really liked me. We were extremely close at the time, and he told me pretty much everything. Well, I didn't like him as anything more than a friend, but he didn't see that. He asked me to be his girlfriend, and I didn't want to hurt his feelings so I said yes. Bad, bad mistake.

I had no romantic interest in him whatsoever. He would try to touch me and I'd almost recoil in disgust. He would ask me out on dates and I'd make up lame excuses for why I couldn't go. It only made him sad and bitter, and in the end it wasn't worth trying to save his feelings from being hurt. They'd been hurt even worse by me leading him on. He practically hated me for a year or two before we became friends again. I felt like crap.

While I can completely understand not wanting to hurt your friend's feelings, it would save her alot of pain to tell her now than let her think you like her when you really don't. The truth is a million times better than a lie, and lies are always more painful.

Just explain that to her. Tell her gently how you don't want to lead her on or hurt her feelings. She may be upset now, but later she'll thank you. Believe me.

Think long and hard before you act. I hope my advice helped you out. If you've got any more questions, feel absolutely free to ask, 'cause I'm here.

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Q: 15/F

I was looking at the question someone asked about good classic rock songs, and your taste in music seems to kick ass! So, my problem is that all I listen to is classic rock, and im completely out of touch with all new music. Since I can trust you to have good taste in music, do you have any suggestions for good modern bands?

A: Well, I don't know if there is such a thing as good taste in modern music. =P You know, with all that "punk" stuff and whatnot. But I'll give you a list of what bands I listen to.

From Autumn to Ashes
Alkaline Trio
Coldplay
Dave Matthews Band
90's Green Day music
90's Foo Fighters music
The Used
Weezer
Breaking Benjamin
Jimmy Eat World
Jane's Addiction
System of a Down

I've not really listened to them, but Nine Inch Nails is a pretty good band.

Also, if you want some more awesome suggestions for classic rock:

The Eagles
The Who
Led Zeppelin (as always)
Pink Floyd

You might want to check out some folk rock like

James Taylor
Cat Stevens

I hope you'll like what I've suggested. I really love them. =)

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Q: 16/F (I'm a waitress..)

There's this guy from work that I like, and I'm not sure if he likes me as more than a friend, or just a friend.

I'm not sure, but I think he flirts with me. He'll steal a salt shaker from one of my tables, and won't give me it back unless I chase him around the kitchen for it. He shouts my name across the dining room, and risks getting fired for it. He talks to me a lot, and will usually even help me clear a table just to talk to me.. he does little things for me like that. If I'm carrying a tray, or something, he'll put his hand on my back and help guide me through the doors. I'm a pretty shy person, so I hate it when I talk to customers as I'm clearing a table, so usually he'll come over and talk to them for me...

But.. there's two other girls.. and they usually go up to him, and hug him. And they're pretty. And outgoing. And I don't know, I just don't think he likes me. How about you?

A: He seems at least somewhat interested in you. All the guys I know just love to tease girls they like in that manner. I think he really likes you. =)

How does he react when the girls hug him? Does he invite them to hug him? Are they just friends? Do a little bit of investigation into that matter. If they're just good friends of his, I could understand him hugging them--it's what close friends do.

Also, does it matter if they're pretty? Some guys don't really care about looks, believe it or not. And I'll tell you this right now: looks don't matter to the people who do. I bet you're quite pretty yourself and are just too humble to admit it.

Outgoing personalities? Some guys like shy, sweet girls. Alot of guys are kind of iffy about outgoing girls because they're, well, outgoing. That can scare a guy witless. Also, some guys don't like outgoing girls because of their reputation for being sluts, etc.

You've got just as much a chance as those other girls. Flirt back a little! Tease HIM a bit, and see how he reacts. Egg him on, he'll love it. And don't ever forget to smile--guys love a beautiful smile.

Spend some more time with him, and get to know him better. Have fun!

I hope things work out for you. Keep me updated, and if you've got any more questions, feel free to ask me.

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Q: does any one know some good classic rock songs?

A: Just to add a few songs to Panramos's list:

The Rain Song - Led Zeppelin
When the Levee Breaks - Led Zeppelin
The Ocean - Led Zeppelin
Going to California - Led Zeppelin
Tangerine - Led Zeppelin
Another Brick in the Wall (Parts 1,2,3) - Pink Floyd
Money - Pink Floyd
Wish You Were Here - Pink Floyd
Bohemian Rhapsody - Queen
We Will Rock You - Queen
Killer Queen - Queen
(I Can't Get No) Satisfaction - Rolling Stones
Have You Ever Seen the Rain? - Creedance Clearwater Revival
Proud Mary - Creedance Clearwater Revival

Those are all great songs. Led Zeppelin is my favorite band, followed by Queen and the Rolling Stones. Pink Floyd is pretty good as well.

Happy listening.

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Q: I want to create my own webpage or homepage or website (jeez im so bad at this I don't even know what its call) I have no idea about all the code, and design, and the problem is even if I registered to some free hosted website. And when I have to kind of decorate my page right i dont know how to do it basically. (cause take a look at my column for example i can't even figure out how to change the background)So if any of you have experienced or good at this be nice if you could help. And if you are willing to help it also be great if you would explain it in a easy-language. like step 1 and step 2 and so on that kinda thing.
P.S. The thing is I kind of want my own domain name.
Thanks
-Patty-

A: The wondeful world of web design. I'm glad you're interested in it! Making websites can be a really fun and addictive hobby once you get the hang of it. It's not that hard, really, and I'll go through a few of the basic steps with you now.

1) Find a host.

If you're just starting out, I definitely recommed Geocities. Just visit http://www.geocities.com and make an account on there. It's easy, and pretty simple.

Once you've got an account, go to your file manager. You should see a link that says "index.html." Check the box beside it and click "Edit."

Now, you'll see a text-box with writing in it. Delete all of it. Once you've got a blank box, here's where the fun starts.

2) Learn HTML.

HTML is probably the simplest type of coding to use when making a website. You've probably used basic HTML before:

BOLD
ITALIC
UNDERLINE
STRIKE-THROUGH

Etc.

Here's how you start out coding your webpage.

Type



Your Webpage Title Here


Your Webpage Text Goes Here and can continue on forever...



The HTML tag tells the site what language you're using.

The head tag is where you'd put your title, links to external style sheets, etc.

The body tag is where the body (or content) of your webpage will be, where you put your DIV layers, tables, etc.

There are lots of great books out there on HTML and web-design. A couple of my favorites are:

The Advanced HTML Companion
by Keith Schengili-Roberts
($29.95)

and

Effective Web Design
by Ann Navarro
($39.99)

Go look for those books at your nearby Barnes and Noble or Books-a-Million. If you're low on cash, check out

http://www.lissaexplains.com

or

http://www.peachie.nu/html.html

Both of these sites offer great tutorials on basic HTML.

Also, if you'd like any one-on-one help with coding your site, feel absolutely free to ask me. I've been working with HTML for five years, and with CSS for about one.

I hope my answer satisfies you, and that you have a great time working on your site!

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Q: Umm.. Would you have any idea where I could get the music video code for "Dirty Little Secret" by All-American Rejects? I've been searching the internet for it for like 2 weeks straight and it is driving me up the wall!! I really want to put it in my myspace! Your help is appreciated more than the ice cream man on the hottest day of July!! THANK YOU

A: I honestly have no idea where to find music video codes.

Where have you been searching? Try typing in "Dirty Little Secret music video codes" in Google, or "All-American Rejects Dirty Little Secret video codes," or variations of what you're looking for.

I'm sure you'll be able to find it, as it's a pretty popular song right now.

Good luck in trying to find it, though.

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Q: hey jeen tucker popped your cherry give me a call 252 442 9978 this is jacob from gca call and ill explain

A: LOLOMG, HOW DID U NO!?!??!?!?!

Seriously, that's messed up.

Can't you find something else to do in your spare time? Like learn how to read or type?

I ain't going to call you, but Tucker might after reading this. =)

What's your screen name on here? I'm dying to see what kind of advice you give.

- "jeen"

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Q: can you tell me some good books that you have read about i love to read and I dont what books are good!
twistedteen25

A: OMGLOL! ly3k, To Kill a Mockingbird was t3h awesome. As was the Hobbit, but we already discussed that.

If you like girly books, the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants is a good series.

If you're into Anime/Manga, check out InuYasha or Ghost in the Shell.

If you like classics, go with Jane Eyre or Crime and Punishment.

What kind of books are you looking for, exactly?

Oh, and thanks for the inbox. =)

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Q: Hey Everyone, Whats up?

You Know Jessica Simpson's new "Dessert line" Of beauty probucts? I was wondering, Can you Really eat them? Or Not? I read the back of a Bottle to see the ingredients and I really couldn't tell. Anyone Know?

(Are they worth the price?)


-SLeK-


(If it matters, I'll rate and leave feedback!)

A: Yes! My friends and I were at the mall during a band trip, and we tried some of it on. It tastes so effin' good. We were walking down the mall licking our arms, and people were staring at us like we were freaks or something (not that we're not, but, haha).

They're definitely edible, but only in small quantities. Don't just pour yourself a glass of the perfume, 'cause that's probably going to make you sick.

I don't think they should be as expensive as they are (it was like $50 for either the lipgloss or the perfume. That's not exact, but you can check it on any Claire's site/store/whatever.), but they sure are good to eat!

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Q: Yesterday my boyfriend and i had sex and i bled on him, we thought that it was jusy my period coming because i am late...but it wasnt my period. He said that it could be possible that i contracted a std from my previous relationship or i could be pregnant. Im not sure what to do or what to believe~Im going crazy because i dont have anyone to talk to about this and if i do have a std he'll probably leave me...and i dont think that i would want to live without him; i'll be better off commiting suicide.

A: Maybe he was a bit too...rough? I don't know of any STD's that make you bleed--at least, not any that I'm aware of. Are you sure it couldn't be your period? Wait it out a few days, and see what happens. If you're still bleeding blood (as in blood blood, not period blood), I would really advise seeing a doctor.

Also, if your boyfriend would leave you just like that, he's some boyfriend. Really, why have sex with someone who would dump you like that?

I hope that you'll find the source of your problem, and that you'll get better soon.

Sporkster

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