Gender:
MaleLocation:
DenmarkOccupation:
TranslatorAge:
43Member Since:
November 28, 2004Answers:
1296Last Update:
April 28, 2014Visitors:
136532Favorite Columnists
lalalaflower
karenR
jenny914
DangerNerd
isis
theymos
Cux
Erinn_the_bamf
Lola
LM
LagunaBabe
more...
Main Categories:
Fitness
Nutrition
Friendship
View All
about

Forum!
advice
Ok here is the thing I have a boyfriend and he is really sweet and all but i like his best friend 2 and like i think i am loseing interest in my boyfriend right now anyway like once he (my boyfrind ) told me he would regret this one thing in life if he did not do it and that was kiss me but now i don't realy want to kiss him i want to stay frineds with him and we made like pack to always stay friends (fwy i am 14 ) and like i just don't want to brake his hart and like me and his best friend are also best friends so i don't want to mess up our friend ship because one of my best friends whent out with him and now they are X's but they are haveing a hard time makeing the friend ship work.any who like i don't know what to do i do more stuff with my boyfriends best friend then i do with my boyfriend and he doesn't even care like i have been out to lunch with him and his parents after going to the mall and been to the moves with him and friends 2 times and i have not done anything with my boyfriend out side ofschool and it will be 3 months the end of this month that we have been going out . what do i do please give me advice thank you
Well I agree with that you should break up with your boyfriend. Thats a must. As for going out with his best friend, thats tricky. I think you can manage to salvage all the friendships here if you wait before asking him out. Give your bf time to heal and get back on his feet, and then you might have no problem dating his best friend (particularly if your ex bf has found someone by then). All depends if he rebounds well or takes it very hard.
So, I dont think its all hopeless, but you are going to have to give it a few months after the breakup (and even then its not guaranteed of course).
As for your friendship with him, that too you need to postpone until he is ok with the breakup. After you guys split he should not see you much or else he might have trouble moving on.
Good luck
i weigh one hundred and fifty pounds and have a stomach that sticks out like all crazy. My stomcah is loose and is like jello. I dont like to go on diets. Another problem is that my mom always says i am fat and should try to loose weight waht should i do? I tried to talk to her and it doesn't help. My friends say i loook fine but my friends dont like to put me down. i just wish i could at least tigten up my stomach or something.
I am also an advocate of the "no diet" principle. There are many ways to solve your problem. In the end, its very much a question of burning more energy than you consume. Eating many small meals (as written below) is a good idea, it helps elevate your metabolism so you burn more calories.
If you have the discipline to start training at the gym (and I mean doing weights), then that would be the most efficient form of exercise for fat loss. Weight training boosts your metabolism like nothing else and you burn calories round the clock (aerobic exercise doesnt do that at all). Naturally a weights workout and a cardio is even better...
As far as eating is concerned, you can make changes on many different levels. Try starting slow, perhaps by regulating your intake of fat (particularly saturated), and also keep your calories below a certain threshold. Make small changes and stick to them. A diet is a temporary solution, what you want is to start making gradual changes in your life style to accomodate proper nutrition (thats permanent).
In the end, if you arent actively gaining weight, even small changes will make you start to lose it. Find the balance that suits you best, by increasing activity level and regulating what you eat.
Once again, the best thing you can do to start off with is to join a gym. Good luck.
where can i get power point ?
The answer below pretty much covers it. I just wanted to add (in case you didnt know) that you can download openoffice for free. That package contains programs that copy the functions of word, powerpoint and excel. Its actually very good and there are bunch of people working to improve it. Heres a link:
http://www.openoffice.org/#00000029
I am not sure how many extra features the paid programs have, but since I have started using it I havent found anything I couldnt do with it (of course my usage is relatively basic).
Not quite what you asked, but hope its of some use to you.
I'm taking a self-defense class at my school right now, and I LOVE it. I've never really thought about taking Martial arts before, but now I really want to. Would it be weird for me to start now? Do they have adult classes? I'm 16, so I don't know if that's too late or something. Also, which type of Martial arts would be the best?
It certainly is not too late. Many people start when they are middle aged. As for which is the best, depends a little bit on what you are after. Ju-jutsu is the one I would recommend for a number of reasons: Its not too hard on you (some martial arts have really intense training schedules); it is very practical usually and you can use many of the self defence techniques rather quickly; its not dependant on physical strength much; and finally it has one of the best records in full contact competitions (beating out most of the martial arts that people typically regarded as effective).
Whatever you choose, have fun!
So, basically I have these problem areas that I've been working on for atleast the past year. I guess you could call them "love handles", my abs, and my inner thighs. I do curl ups (like 100 a night), these one leg things like 25 a night, and i dont know what to do about myl ove handles. Oh, sometimes I run about a mile.
I don't know what to do anymore.
Nothing helps.
Pleaseeee help. =)
You cannot target fat loss to an area of the body. Curl ups, crunches, or whatever do not remove fat from an area, they only build muscle there. Thats why it hasnt worked.
So stop doing specific exercises no matter what advice you get, the human body simply doesnt work that way.
The only thing you can do is to either lose weight (overall) and eventually your body will get to your problem areas. Your only other alternative is to accept them as they are or disguise them (as per the advice given below mine).
I am not sure if you need general tips on weight loss, so I wont put any down here. Just send a question to my inbox if you do and I will be happy to help.
Here is a link to a nice site that has a whole load of exercises for your whole body:
http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/exercises.htm
Its a pretty comprehensive list, so you should be able to find all sorts of stuff in there. That being said... all they do is build muscle remember that.
Sorry if this wasnt what you wanted to hear.
Good luck.
I'm curious about something. If a person has been a smoker since they've been 12 years old, what long term effects would it have on the person? I'm asking because my friends wife is 54 and has been smoking since she was 12. She smokes about 2 packs a day. I think he is worried about her health. I already know that it has prematurely aged her from the outside. She has a very wrinkled face and horrible black and yellow stained teeth. Also does anyone have any solutions as to how she could quit? I hear it's very hard but possible.
Well the effects of smoking are very profound. It not only affects everything it comes in contact with (as in increasing the risk of cancer in the mouth, lungs etc etc) but also has been correlated with increased cancer risk in other areas too. My father used to work for the World Health Organisation and I had the "pleasure" or reading many of the studies done on smokers... not a pretty picture. Everything you mentioned yourself holds, but its mainly surface stuff. The real harm comes from risk of cancer, strokes and heart disease.
Now all that being said, I used to be a smoker. Quitting was the hardest thing I have ever done. There is no formula to it. Some people respond well to those patches and gum (my mother quit that way), but for me it was simply stopping. I didnt sleep for a week, my hands were shaking, I had all the symptoms of a freakin junkie. It took about 2 months of hell to control the craving (3 years later it still comes back from time to time).
Another thing to remember is that the later you quit the less you will get out of it. One study showed that if you quit no later than the age of 31 or 32, you would not suffer any increased chance of disease (compared to a non smoker). Any later and it would still (statistically) cut a few years off your life. Make no mistake... its ALWAYS a good idea to quit. Just the earlier you do it (after your early 30s), the better it is.
Also... 2 packs a day is a hell of a lot. She would be in the very high risk group. If I were you I would encourage her to see a doctor and try some of the anit smoking products that he would recommend. The sooner the better. Good luck
okayy im not fat i have a really good body actually i need to get in shape like my thys and that area have stretch marks and it looks like i have cellulite cus i have dimples and my stomach is pretty skinny i just want abs you know how can i get "fit"?
The best way, if you have the time, is to join a gym. Nothing at all compares to that since there you can vary your exercises and get far faster and better results.
You havent exactly defined what you mean by "fit", so its hard to give advice. Here is a link with all sorts of exercises (just click on the muscle you want to train):
http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/exercises.htm
Remember, you get a lot more out of a full body routine than out of just targetting a single muscle or two.
Now, if you arent the gym type, why not start playing a sport. Any "proper" sport (by which I mean things like soccer, volleyball, etc and not bowling or darts) will build some muscle on the areas you were worried about. Sports are a great way to burn calories and tone up, and they are often easier for people to stick to in the long run.
Anyways, good luck and feel free to drop me a note if you have more specific questions and ideas as to what you want to do.
im not sure but i think i know someone who suffers from bulimia. i really want to know. i have confronted this person about it but they just deny it. i told them facts about doing this and how bad it is for thier health but i still think they do it. is there a way to tell if they do it without confronting them and if so is there a way i can help
One way they hide it when they go to the bathroom is they leave the water running. So, adding to the answer below mine, go and listen and you will have an extra hint if the water is running for ages (if they arent taking a shower, what else could it be?).
If you do find out about it, I reckon the only way you can do anything is if they are young (you didnt mention any ages here). If she (I will asume its a girl) is still not an adult, tell her parents. You should probably tell her you are going to do it first, so there is no misunderstanding, but once you have found out confronting is a must.
If its an adult we are dealing with there isnt much you can do other than try to persuade them to stop. Talk to her other friends maybe, anyone in a position to influence her. Good luck.
I use Ad-Aware SE, and I ran a scan for my computer for viruses and such, and so far (after scanning 82,000 plus files, and counting), it's found 80 new critical objects.
I can't seem to figure out how to get rid of these. If anyone has experience with this program or knows something I could download that would not only find viruses but destroy, them, that'd be great.
Thanks.
You have to wait til the end of the scan and then just continue to the remove screen (by clicking on the bottom right). Odds are you probably got there just after submitting this question.
Now, as far as viruses go, you should also run a virus checker. I recommend avast (just search for it in google), its free and good.
Spybot is also a good one for adware as suggested below, sometimes Ive had stuff that only one or the other would find.
I recorded myself singing on a video recorder, which is pretty accurate, and it was really...well, different than I expected. It wasn't that bad, but it wasn't really good. But my dad and choir teacher say that I'm good. Does everyone think they don't sound too good for the first time, or is it just me? Am I not a good judge of this because it's hearing myself for the first time and all?
Pretty much everyone thinks they sound like a dork the first time they hear their voice recorded. You can get used to it eventually, but it just sounds wrong at the beginning.
We all hear ourselves a notch lower than everyone else does (if memory serves) which is what makes is so strange when we hear ourselves on tape.
So give it a bit, and listen to yourself often to get used to it. Your dad and choir are probably right.
Ok im not extremely overweight but i am fat. im 15 years old and i weigh more than 145 pounds.. ive been excersizing alot and ive actually lost about 15pounds but, my stomach wont seem to shrink. i do 500 crunches a day, and other things but it still wont budge. im on an ok diet if that counts. i can suck my stomach in alot to make me skinner but when im not i get HUGE.. please help im tired of being fat and ugly.. is it possible to get lipo? or some kind of surgery like that? and what kind of excersises can i do?
i rate 5's!! thanks
Have patience, your stomach will shrink eventually if you continue to lose weight.
To answer your questions. Lipo is a possiblity though I wouldnt recommend it (actually I dont know how they look upon it for really young people). Lipo is a painful process which has at times been known to go wrong. Also they can only pull a small percentage of fat off with it.
As for exercises, there are none that you can do. You cannot target fat loss, its just not possible for humans to do that despite popular belief. So, stop doing a zillion crunches, they are not helping, instead train your whole body and you will get faster better results.
So, before getting under the knife, my advice would be to give it just another few months (say half a year perhaps). Eat smart and exercise and if you have already lost 15 pounds, you are on the right track.
Heylo. I just got out of a 9month relationship about 3 days ago. I haven't eaten anything in 2 days and a half. I don't have any eating disorders. I'm already underweight as it is. I dont know what to do. I've tried eating but I get so nauseous. I've puked about 6 times already. I tried soup, ice cream, salads, hot meals..and it makes me so sick.
Any foods that you suggest I try? I'm starving..but the food I usually eat...taste HORRIBLE and i cant keep it in my stomach. How long can you go without eating (but you're drinking water) before you get really sick?
Hmmm, I concur with the previous person, you might already be ill. I cant say how long one can go without eating before being sick, though i know that one can survive for a few weeks (about 3 i think).
As the previous person suggested try to eat very small amounts and see if it helps. If you really cant then you should see a doctor. If they determine that you are at risk they will put you in that contraption that transfers nutrients directly to your blood stream (cant remember the english name right now). Do this particularly if you start to feel tired or like you might pass out.
As for suggesting foods, you already got some of the ones I would have tried... generally the blander the better, no spices or anything like that. Have you tried something like mashed potatoes? How about drinking milk, are you able to drink that or do you throw it up too?
Anyways, good luck I hope you get better and do see someone if this continues.
okay so my upper arms are really saggy, like selulite (SP). what can i do to get rid of it?
like weight lifting maybe or something?
also if i can loose weight on my arms what excercises target that area AS WELL AS the rest of my body?
You cannot target fat loss off anywhere on your body. The human body cannot do that, you can either lose weight overall (at which point fat cells will be burnt from all over) or not at all.
So, dont bother targetting only your arms, it will have no effect (other than at most tightening the area up a bit).
As far as weight loss is concerned, weight training is excellent because of its effect on your metabolism. Here is a link to a site which has a whole bunch of exercises for the whole body:
http://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/exercises.htm
Just click on the muscle you want to train. Sorry if this wasnt the answer you wanted, it really would be so much easier if one could localise fat loss... unfortunately one cant.
ok..im 13 and i still have huuge love handles. people always tell me that i should do side crunches to get rid of them...but i've been doing them for like a year..and nothing happens!! what else should i try?
For the love of God thats why you shouldnt listen to that sort of advice. Sorry if i seem wound up its just that there is a fitness myth going around advicenators (or maybe the whole world) that it is possible to target fat loss through exercise.
There is no exercise on earth that can make you do that, humans dont work that way. You have the choice to lose weight (overall) or not to lose weight. If you choose the former, then your body will eventually burn up your love handles, but you can never know how soon that will happen (and you cannot affect it either).
Now, if you want to lose weight the best form of exercise is resistance training (like weights) because of the effect it has on your metabolism. Proper nutrition and such is just as important. If you want specific advice on that feel free to drop me a note.
Please please please pass it on to all your friends... targetting an area will at MOST tighten the area up a bit, it will do nothing for fat loss there. Training your entire body is the key, nothing less.
I believe in abstinence, which is not having sex until you are married. I was just wondering how many guys would dump a girl who wouldnt have sex with him if they were going out? Guys tell me if you would dump me.
Well its really about 50-50 I would say. I wouldnt personally, but I have a number of friends that would dump you in a heartbeat.
The whole oral sex thing might save some relationships but lets be serious, thats just a really cheap way to compromise your morals.
is it gay for a guy to go on a diet?
lol... yes I do believe that what homosexuals do... they diet together.
okay say if you give someone oral sex and you do swallow their cum. well do you like always get STDS or only if they have an STD? because people make it sounds that everyone has an STD and if you dont use a condom then you'll get STDS. like im confused.
They have to already have an STD. And then there is a significant chance you wont get anything anyway (depending on the STD). The reason people say it like that is to scare you. Not to trivialize STDs because if you get one it wont be a pretty picture, but its not as easy as that.
I'm 13, and I weight 115 lbs. I want to drop a few pounds so that my thighs are slimmer and my stomach doesn't poke out of my shirt. Most of me is pretty skinny except for those 2 areas. I'm horrible with commitment so how do I take off the weight and keep it off? ( I'm very busy so exercising for a long time is a no, I'm not good at staying with the "no soda" act either)
Well, there really is only one way to lose weight in the broad sense. You have to burn more calories than you consume. You can affect this in a 3 ways 1. Eat less/ eat smarter 2. Exercise more 3. Affect your metablolism so you burn more cals.
Now, just in case you dont know (almost no one on this site seems to be aware of this), fat loss cannot be targeted. Doing crunches does not make you lose fat of your stomach etc etc. Humans dont work that way (if anyone says otherwise they are not from Earth).
So understand that once you start to lose weight you may (or may not) lose weight from other areas of your body regardless of what you do.
Anyway, you have a couple of options. You can calculate your daily calorie needs and create a small daily deficit of a few hundred cals. Alternatively you can increase your activity level. Here is a link to calculate your calorie usage (its your BMR plus cals burned in activities):
http://www.internetfitness.com/calculators/bmr.htm
Here are a few general tips:
Eat balanced meals, low on saturated fats. Eat many small meals every day (it helps boost your metaboism- start with 5 meals a day). Drink plenty of water... even if you cant cut out the soda it might help you cut down a bit (and it has other benefits too).
The best form of exercise for fat loss(and it really does not need to take long) is weight/resistance training... this is because this also affects your metabolism (unlike aerobics for example).
Dont waste your time only with target specific exercises they will NOT deliver the results you want (not unless those small nr of cals you burn doing them were all you needed to lose weight in the first place). If you have time to do something at home, at least try to work as many different muscles as possible, you will get better results.
In the end there is no great secret to weight loss. Take control of your diet and be aware of what you eat and of what you burn. Remember that small, healthy, sustainable changes in your diet and activity level are far superior to any quick fix.
I've been doing sets of 100 crunches
*Partial curls front and both sides
*Whatever it's called when you lay on your back and lift your legs, turn yourself into an L, then bring your legs back down without touching the floor and back up
*bicycles (where you like try to touch your right elbow to your left knee while you move your legs like you're riding a bike)
for a few weeks. 100 when I wake up and 100 before I go to sleep.
First - am I doing enough so that I'll actually see results?
I've had trouble with crunches before because I've been on a medication that kinda caused me to gain weight and retain water. I just went off of it and supposedly I'll be able to lose the weight and fat. So ignoring the med, will I see results from what I'm doing?
Second - While I do my crunches, my abs hurt, but after, they stop. Am I doing them right? I used to exercise to the point that my abs would hurt the next day, but I only had that result once and that was from doing like 700 crunches because I felt like it.
Please lay off the chatspeak. If I have to read your answer more than once to understand it, you'll be rated down.
Thanks!
What sort of results are you after?
Sounds like you should have built up a good amount of muscle on the area, if thats what you meant. Two things I can add on this point... 1. You dont need to train so you have pain the next day 2. Instead of doing a zillion reps have you considered adding some weight to the exercise (like holding a weight behind your head in regular crunches for example... it should be more effective).
If you meant getting a flat stomach and so on, crunches and other ab workouts have little to do with it. Then you need to lose weight. Just in case you dont know, fat loss cannot be targeted to an area of the body, so doing ab workouts will have no effect there. The order of fat loss is not in our control, the only thing we can do is make our body start to lose weight. Therefore, it follows that a full body routine and proper nutrition is the key.
If you want abs of steel, which arent neccessarily visible, than you are doing ok, but if you want any other sort of result then targetting only the stomach is a total waste of time.
15f christian....
I used to always masturbate. quite alot. but then about 2 weeks ago i read something that said that masturbating is a sin. well ever since i read that i havent masturbated, i actually gave in yesterday but then i felt reallllly guilty afterwards. is this bad because i mean will it mean i'll never be able to enjoy masturbating? is this normal and will i ever get over it? please help. i rate 5's!
This is a really tricky question which seems to have many subquestions implied.
First of all, is it a sin? I am not a religious expert (though I do know a bit), and I concur with the interpretation of that religious person a few answers below mine. Yes it is.
Secondly, is it normal (to feel guilty)? As long as you perceive it as "wrong" you will feel guilty... so yes, its normal.
Third, will you get over it? I doubt that you will go through the rest of your life like this. I mean, you will at some point make a choice to either stop, or to continue. Either way, once your mind is made up the guilt will eventually go away.
Debating whether one should adhere to this, from a Christian point of view, is no different than to question the validity of the religion. Many people have a similar point of view to the first person who answered. This point of view is in my opinion flawed... you cannot pick and choose your rules, the religion is either acceptable in its entirety or not at all. If God made these rules not a single syllable is to be questioned. This is a choice you must make for yourself, and decide whether to abide by the rules or not.
From a strictly medical point of view (which is not particularly relevant here I know), masturbation is good for your health.
Good luck.
Oh btw, in case you were wondering, I am not religious.