"People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed; never throw out anyone." - Audrey Hepburn
I came to this site for advice about a man and love. That very question turned my entire world around and I have had my eyes opened to things I never noticed before.
I've stayed here so that I can share the knowledge I do have. I know I'm not changing the world but I do hope that I spark others to open their eyes.
"The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself." - Oscar Wilde
So, if you learn something from what I say then repeat it to someone else who can use it.
I hope that if you see an answer of mine that you enjoy it will inspire you to go out of your way to give good, solid information. Provide links for further information, detail your responses, encourage people to seek out professionals when it's needed, and stop sugar-coating responses and just say the truth.
I hope that even if you absolutely hate my answer that it'll kick start your brain. Hopefully you'll begin taking your time to respond instead of hurried answers that are useless to an already confused person.
"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." - Robert Frost
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How do you get over a miscarriage? It's been 4 years now. Shouldn't it be high time I let that go or will the sadness ever go away? I'm on depression pills due to a breakdown from having a miscarriage and am just wondering if I will ever get any better!? (link)
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It's time to talk to a professional.
Everyone deals with this sort of thing differently. Just with abortions, miscarriage can really damage your mentality. It can cause you more emotional pain than physical. It can leave you with scars and a broken heart. Obviously, it can put you into a deep depression.
You should seek counseling so that you can express your inner concerns, fears, and emotional trauma of the incident. There is nothing to be ashamed of. This happens. You aren't the only one that is having a hard time getting over something like this.
Pregnancy causes hormones to change pretty dramatically. Miscarriage causes them to change, again, very quickly. It can be such a roller coaster that you subconsciously fear it will happen again. It's a great deal of stress on the body. It can take a lot of vitamins and nutrients out of you that you body needs (and, even though it's been 4 years, you should be taking a good multivitamin every day).
Emotionally you lost a baby. Losing a baby isn't easy, even if you never got the chance to meet the little one yet. When you find out you're expecting you get prepared. You start thinking of names, how their personality will be, and what color to paint the room. You don't think of losing them or death. It's what it is.
You may blame yourself for the miscarriage. It's common. Even if you don't realize it, you might do it. It can be hurtful to think you caused a death. I don't think anyone really takes that easily.
Pills aren't going to make everything all better if you aren't fixing the problem. Pills will only cover up the hurt. You need some therapy so that you can move past pills and be yourself again. Pills won't solve the problem. They never do and that's why people are on them for life. If you don't treat the real problem then all you will be doing is masking the hurt with synthetic drugs.
Talk to a doctor. Get some one-on-one help. Discuss how the miscarriage made you feel. Your thoughts on it. Your feelings. How things happened. How everyone reacted. What it was like. Anything and everything. They can help you sort through this. Therapy might not fix it in a day, week, month, or even 4 years. You've been trying the pill thing for awhile now and it's, obviously, not working. It's time to step it up and fix what is really broken.
I wish you well and hope that you never have to experience the loss again. You're not alone and if you need more people (other than a professional) to talk to about it there are plenty of online community for people who have miscarried and lost a baby during pregnancy. They might offer you a great deal of emotional support through your therapy sessions and can help you to maintain a positive attitude because therapy won't be easy either.
You can get better.
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im a 14 yrold girl and have a history of mental health problems like depression paranoia and the occasional acute delusion. my dreams tend to be otherworldly and imaginative. i've had rape dreams before but none as real as last night. normally i cant feel the pain and normally i have nuetral emotions in the dreams i have involving sex. last night i felt extreme emotional and physical pains. while being used about five times by different men in different places. i had nervously scratched my arms in my sleep and woke up red and swollen. even when i woke i was still half asleep and endured more horrible beatings and rapes which in being half conscious i can still remember vividly. all day i thought of the nightmare. i was caught spacing out with an 'in pain' look on my face in the car by my step mom. i couldnt talk with my best friend because i was too upset. i keep scratching at my arms and staring into space. all i can think of is how i felt. when the men hit me and shoved themselves inside me. i can still hear me screaming and crying. i've never been raped i am a complete virgin so i know these arent dreams from memory. how can i make the thoughts go away? how can i sleep tonight? why am i dreaming such horrible things? (link)
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Therapy.
I know you may already see a psychologist but this is really important to tell them. It could stem from purely an absolute fear.
The thing that you must realize is that dreams are different for everyone. Dreams are only dreams. They aren't real. They won't ever be real. They cannot be real.
If it didn't happen then it did not happen. Keep that in mind. If you keep dwelling on it then it's likely that you will dream it again. That's how dreams your subconscious mind works.
Get your mind off of it. Do something that will create joy. Keep active in your mind. Don't think about the dream. At bedtime, remind yourself of all of the positive things in your life. Get relaxed. Make your room your secure haven. Be comfortable.
You can't really choose what you want to dream and what you don't. You can manipulate them and try to force yourself to dream a little of this or that if you want. In a dream like that, remind yourself that you're the one that really has the power. I have a trick where I start to count from the number 1 upward. I've never had to make it to number 10. I always wake up well before then. I have complete control. Sometimes, when I realize it's just a dream, I just alter things. I give the bad guys funny wigs or I disappear and float away so nobody can get me. Just stuff like that. Realizing that you have complete power in the dreams. The dreams aren't real. It's all inside of your head. It's your imagination going wild.
Lots of people "feel" things in their sleep. You can't help it. It happens. Hear those stories about people eating their pillows? They felt the sugary taste of marshmallows when they bit into the cotton pillows ;)
Talk to a counselor to help you sort the feelings out. The truth is, there might not be anything that can be done. Sure, they may offer sleeping pills so that you're knocked out cold but it isn't going to prevent dreams from happening. It's something that we, as humans, have to learn to deal with.
Try to move past it. Realize that it wasn't real. You have the power and control in the dreams. You can make the bad guys turn into pigeons if you want when you realize that it's just a dream. Talk out your feelings with a professional in case it stems from a deep fear of something hidden within the dream.
Beyond that, we can't help. We aren't professionals. We are only humans, just like you. We can only offer the support that we know from our own nightmares. I hope you have a better night tonight.
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I masturbate a lot. I know you can get STDs from having sex. Sexually transmitted diseases. Makes sense. Masturbating is sort of like sex with yourself though. So, does that mean I can actually get STDs by masturbating? How common is it, if so? And are there any ways to prevent it then so I don't get STDs from this? (link)
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Yes, it's very possible.
If you aren't very hygienic or have come in contact with nasty germs then you can have bacteria and other infections on your hands. New studies are showing that strains of herpes and HPV can actually live deep under the nailbed of the fingernails. It's very important to always wash your hands with soap and warm water before engaging in ANY sexual contact with yourself or other people. Purchase a cheap nailbrush to scrub the dirt from under the nails and get them squeaky clean too.
The likelihood of STD risk during masturbation hasn't really been determined yet. I would say that the odds or chances are growing each day with so many new STDs being found out about and spread through simple contact. Always wash your hands before the love!
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I have a heavy white discharge, i also have my period once a month but almost all other times i have a really heavy white discharge, heavy to the point where i have to wear a pantie liner is this normal? i'm only 13 (link)
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Heavy white discharge so much that you must wear a pantyliner?
No, not normal for most women.
White discharge should only be happening around the time you ovulate. You should be ovulating around day 14 of your cycle for only a day or two.
It sounds like you might have a yeast infection. It's time to see a doctor. Let your mom know that you're having some odd stuff happening down there and that you'd like to talk to a professional about it. She has probably had to deal with yeast infections before so you can probably say, "I am having a lot of white discharge..." and she'll know it isn't normal either.
A yeast infection isn't going to kill you or hurt your womanly parts. The problem is that there is an infection that has similar traits to a yeast infection that can be serious, cause you life-long pain, and make you completely infertile. It's a bacterial infection that you will want to rule out by seeing a doctor. If it's a yeast infection, which it probably is, then they can give you some medicine that can clear it up pretty quickly.
Doctor time.
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Okay, so my boyfriend came over and we were making out on the bed. it got a little hot and heavy and he got an erection. He was wearing gym shorts and underwear and i myself was wearing shorts, underwear and a pad. but i am not on my period it was just in case something would come out. so there was a wet spot on his shorts and i think the semen went through his pants so i backed off a bit and didn't even touch my loweerr body to his. My underwear feels a little wet and when he left i went to the bathroom and my pee was alot darker then usual i feel a little queasy but i think that is just from how nervous i am. my tummy is doing some irregular rumbling and i pooped but i think it's doing that because i might be pregnant. White jelly like substances are coming out of my vagina and everytime i think of the wholee situation and what we did my underwear gets a little wet. I washed my blankets and now i feel like im pregnant. He told me it was not possible but im not so sure. It is possible for me to be pregnant? Im not feeling nausaus or throwing up or anything like that im not really in the mood to eat so are those signs of pregnancy? by the way im 13. && i have never been sexually active the closest i have ever got to being sexually active was doing this with my boyfriend. Please help mee!!! im so scared! (link)
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Sperm CAN travel through clothing if the clothes are moist enough. The pregnancy risk is dramatically lowered, especially since there was no penetration and you backed off of his parts as soon as you realized it was moist. If you were wearing a pad then, chances are, the moistness never even touched your vagina. Sperm on the vagina (or IN the vagina) is what to worry about.
You probably wouldn't notice pregnancy signs for another couple of weeks at least. The egg wouldn't have been fertilized and implanted already. It's highly unlikely that you would already be feeling pregnancy symptoms.
White stuff coming out of your vagina right now that you haven't ever noticed before is just your natural lubrication to get ready for sex. Vaginas need to be fairly moist to accommodate a penis comfortably. It being more whitish colored than usual might mean your at your peak fertility time and you are ovulating (releasing an egg).
Relax, calm down, and wait it out. If your period skips then you can try a home pregnancy test.
Purchase some condoms. Even if you guys are just going to do some dry humping he can wear a condom to make sure the sperm doesn't end up getting into your vagina. It won't hurt him and it'll help to cut down on pregnancy risks. Plus, if you two are getting this close to actually having sex then it's good to have condoms on hand if the mood strikes and you do take the dangerous leap.
Remember that nothing is 100% effective on preventing pregnancy or STD risks. Condoms aren't going to ensure you will never get pregnant or that your partner won't give you an STD. Think it through before continuing this sort of sexual behavior. It really could mean changing the rest of your life.
Be smart.
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I texted my ex boyfriend from my friends phone and said "so, seems like you and ___ are really hitting it off (;" and he said "ha yea totally..." They haven't talked face to face, but they have texted uh, three times. he usually answers back right away when she texts him, he laughs in basically all of the texts, I told him he should come to her bonfire and he said "yea, maybe" What should he do? Through just that do you think he's getting to the liking stage? Thanks! (link)
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Ok, let me get this straight. You sent a text message, pretending to be your best bud, to your EXboyfriend. You were curious if he and (you/other girl) are getting along so you sent a basic message asking if he liked (you/other girl). He response positively. You don't understand what this could mean.
Does he like you?
"You and (the-real-you / another girl) are hitting it off, huh?"
"Yeah, totally!"
...is this seriously a question? Of course he likes whoever it is you asked him if he liked. He didn't do an iffy face. He wasn't like, "Yeah...I guess...sorta..." Looks like he was pretty darn clear about it to me. There isn't any "hidden meaning" that I can tell. Heck, there's not even enough words to have a hidden meaning!
Yes, he likes (you / other girl). It doesn't mean he's CRAZY for (you / other girl) but he probably wouldn't mention that to a complete stranger anyway.
Sounds like he's being honest to me.
To make it sound like you're not creepy stalking him you should have your best bud continue texting him in a friendly manner. I hate to break it to you but a lot of this is really childish and he may be able to see through it and realize it was really you asking.
Maybe you should call him, hmm? ;)
If you did ask him if he liked YOU:
If you're expecting him to come out and say, "OMG! I LOVE HER! SHE IS AWESOME!" then you need to realize that this is real life. Of course he isn't going to text something like that, especially to a stranger he rarely ever texts anyway. He isn't telling you he likes you in real life for a multitude of reasons. Maybe because of a bad breakup or afraid of getting hurt. Maybe because he isn't sure how YOU feel and doesn't want to be embarrassed. Boys have feelings too. Maybe because he just likes you and that's as far as his feelings go. It's time to talk to him if you're curious though.
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what could I have. Here are some symptoms.
-cramp like feelings in the stomach. Not painful, but it just feels like when you're on your period and something is breaking.
-headache
-nausea all the time almost
-hard time breathing, i feel like i have to take deep breaths.
-right side of stomach a little tiny bit of pain
-fatigue, but not sleepy
do you guys know what this might be? (link)
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Time to see a doctor.
It can be anything. It can be symptoms from a serious STD. It can be a mental disorder. It can be something physically wrong. It can be an underlying allergy (like if you get MSG a lot). It can be just from daily stress. It can be from pregnancy, abortion, or miscarriage. Heck, it can really be nearly anything.
See a professional doctor. Get it checked out. Tell them what is going on. If they can't find anything wrong then seek mental therapy, since many times people simply imagine their "symptoms".
It's possible that you body is just trying to tell you that something is not right. We aren't going to be able to diagnose you through the internet, I'm sorry. We can only help guide you to the people who can. See a doctor immediately to make sure nothing is serious. Sometimes the little symptoms can mean big trouble. It's time to get help.
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Over the past six years or so, I've lived as a recluse. I have virtually no human contact other than what is required. In an average day, I probably say about 100 words aloud. I had a small group of 3-6 "friends" in elementary school, but I very rarely did anything outside of school with them.
Unlike most people with this problem, mine is entirely self-inflicted. I was never bullied, and I've had no "bad relationships" of any kind. I simply do not enjoy multi-person activities (including conversation). Since I viewed friendship as useless in the past, I didn't pursue it, and I am now completely incapable of participating in any kind of social interaction due to lack of experience.
Recently, over the past 2-3 years, this state has increasingly been bothering me for the following reasons:
* Having no social network of any kind puts me at an enormous disadvantage in gathering and spreading information.
* I have not a single person I can really trust with anything.
* Not having any human contact makes me depressed/lonely from time to time. Even though I don't consciously *want* human contact, I clearly need it in order to fix this.
So I eventually want to have like five friends (preferably online) who I can trust. It's no good just to have five contacts sitting in my instant messaging program; I need actual friends with whom I have real understanding.
How do I do this? Keep in mind that I have less social understanding than the average 3-year-old, and I am completely useless in a conversation. I also don't particularly enjoy conversation.
Don't tell me to "go out and talk to people". That's what all the websites say, and it does me exactly no good because I don't know the first thing about having a conversation. In all cases that I've tried to randomly participate in a conversation (_many_ times, online and off), I say virtually nothing because everything moves too fast for me and I can't think of anything to say.
I've posted this stuff to one other site, and despite talking to several of the people there, nothing good came of it. I will therefore be reluctant to contact anyone offering to "be my friend" in their response.
(18/m) (link)
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Ever looked up Asperger's syndrome?
Or, heck, even a very high functioning autism?
What you describe is almost by the book. It happens. You're not the only one out there. Heck, that's me too.
There are a lot of sites that are dedicated to finding online friends. You probably will have a hard time with them because they will be looking for someone who is highly active in conversation. They're looking for more socialization. You're not really looking for that. You didn't just wake up and say, "The people I interact with each day is not enough. I need more communication with others! Must find!"
Try starting in a community based on socially awkward people or a group with socialization problems (like autism or Asperger's). They will be able to relate better and have better expectations of the conversations you do choose to have with them. They won't be looking for...social entertainment, is what I'm trying to say.
Stick with it and keep trying though. Friendships are hard to create, especially if you don't have experience with creating them. Online friendships can be harder for some people because of the facelessness of it (you will find that many Asperger's and austistics won't have that probably as severely as facial expressions tend to go unnoticed anyway). Keep posting. Try to be somewhat active in the search. Tell people a little about yourself--what you are interested in (sci-fi novels? watching the big bang theory on TV? building wooden models of cars? whatever it is you like to do).
Start online and learn acceptable communication from online conversations. It might take awhile to get use to it. In time you'll find it's easier to talk with somebody. You can begin taking that in your offline world. It takes awhile though, trust me. Heck, you might meet someone online that becomes your friend and can help you to move friendships to your offline world, you know? My husband has been great on teaching me how to have conversations with people. Though, I still have problems coming off as sounding cold online, apparently.
Don't stress over it too much. It will happen when the right friend runs into you. Growing up, I only had 1 friend until my 10th grade year. Even then, the friends I had were not "close" and I didn't tell them much. Friendships don't just magically fall into your lap. It'll be ok. In time you'll see somebody you chat with create a friendship bond with you. Just keep at it and don't worry too much. :)
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I just got out of a 6 month rehab place and i havent had sex in soooooooooo long. I need need need sex!
myspace.com/oliviamakesyascream212
(link)
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Do you NEED common sexually transmitted diseases like herpes, genital warts, gonorrhea, AIDS, syphilis, and chlamydia, too? :( What a shame.
I know it might sound fun right now but think it over. Who wants to be the dirty 25 year old woman with every known STD on the planet? Cracked out, heartbroken, looking for love and affection from all of the wrong people all because she screwed up her life when she was a teen. Things like that really do happen.
Condoms aren't going to protect you from everything. Pills don't always work on preventing pregnancies. Your reputation can follow you for years--even into the job field when you're an adult.
This really is a huge sign of life failure. Rethink it while you can.
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17/F
I currently have one lobe piercing on each ear and would like to get two more lobe piercings on each ear. I was wondering if it was okay to get them done at the same time or if I needed to space out the piercings.
Just fyi, my first piercing was never infected and I hardly ever cleaned it.
Thanks :) (link)
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The most "new" piercings you should have at a time is 2. It's so that they heal properly. Even if the piercing doesn't get infected it does take your body a lot to heal up. It's a puncture wound, after all, even if it's small. It takes weeks to heal up right and for your body to get back to normal.
I would space them out to make sure everything goes right. You wouldn't want your immune system to get lowered because your body was fighting off infection or trying to heal 4 puncture wound holes at once. I hate dealing with colds and I bet you do too. A lowered immune system makes you vulnerable to illness.
It really isn't that long to wait in between ear piercings unless you're gauging them or something crazy anyway.
And you should be glad that your body fights off infection so quickly since you remarked about not having to clean your previous ear piercings. That means your body has fought off all the dirt and nasty debris that it has encountered on those wounds before you even knew they existed. Good job, immune system! ;)
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hi i dont have long distance on my landline telephone.(its verizon) so i can't make long distance phone calls. its even restricted so you can't make them by mistake. if someone calls me from a long distance number, will i still get charged for a long distance call? (link)
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You would only get charged if they called collect or something. You would have to verbally approve the charges when you answered the phone though. It would say something about so-and-so calling you, would you like to accept the charges...and you would have to say, "Yes," to talk to the person on the other line.
Otherwise, the person making the call is the one getting the charge and paying the bill. Answering your phone doesn't cost anything. It would be pretty darn awful considering how many people dial wrong numbers every day.
So, shortly, no. You won't be charged to answering a long-distance phone call.
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If it's a LANDLINE then you don't have minutes to use up. Please don't listen to people who can't read ;)
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ok so about a year ago i read a few of my dads text messages. there were some texts of questionable nature and they were sent to a guy. i told my sister and then we sat down together and told my mom. she confronted my dad who denied it and we all went along with our little lives. then yesterday, i was the only one awake in my house and my dads iPod touch was charging in the kitchen, i proceeded to start playing some apps and what not. but then i got a funny feeling that i should click on the "email" app. so i did. he had 3 different email accounts set up to it, two of them i was familiar with, but i had never seen the third before. so i clicked on it and this is when i wish i would just STOP going through my dads stuff. he had several emails from different guys talking in ways two guys should not talk to each other (especially a married man with FIVE kids!) some emails said what they are into, some talked about meeting up, some said "nice pic, hope to see the real thing". i'm 17, not stupid so i know what they were talking about!
so my dad is bi sexual, obviously! but i don't know what to do! do i tell my mom or confront my dad?? my dad would get pissed that i looked through his stuff and that i am accusing him of this again! my dad is a jerk already, but i don't want him to hate me! i have 3 little brothers ages 7, 5 and 1, all i keep thinking about is how this will affect them if i say something. my youngest brother, we are in the process of adopting him, and i would be devastated if we couldn't adopt him, if they got a divorce. should i wait until September, when the adoption is complete to say something? my sister moved out of state, so i cant talk to her as easily, so she cant help me again.
my dad is always on my case about how i cant be trusted to do things, when he is the one with a secret like this! i have no idea what to do! i have been severely nauseous since last night. i don't want to possibly break up the family by saying something, i would rather this still all be a secret. i would feel so responsible for the divorce if i said something. i just don't know what to do. i am also shocked because we go to church every week, twice a week. my dad just got a position in the youth group...how is he going to teach the youth not to sin when he is committing one of the biggest sins??
i get sick every time i think about my brothers and my mom. i know i cant keep this in because it has been eating me alive and its only been 10 hours since i found out. i don't know what to do..i need help. what am i supposed to do? so much is riding on my family, a divorce would mess everything up. i would lose some of the most important things in my life. help me...please?
also, my dad took his ipod to work with him, as he does every day. so i cant really show my mom, without him around...
(link)
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That's pretty tough.
I feel like your mother should know. She already knew once though, confronted him, and never did solve the problem entirely from what we are aware of.
Without cold hard evidence to show your mother, she might not fully believe you or take you seriously. Many parents are like this, actually. I'm not sure why. I guess they're too afraid of the truth.
She deserves to know though. My mother cheated on my father a lot and I wish my dad knew more about it right away so that things could be handled. I am not happy with how things turned out but that's why I was the child and they were the adults.
What would I do?
I would talk with your mother, privately. I would tell her exactly what you told us. I would say flat-out that I was snooping because the gadget was just there and you wanted to mess with your dad's applications. You're a teen. You get curious about things like that. You saw the email, got curious, opened it up, and was pretty shocked. Go for it and describe what the emails say. She needs to know it. Then, I would ask her to look at the iPod touch herself before making any moves in the relationship, including confronting your father. Simply tell her exactly step-by-step what you did to get there.
Then comfort her. Let her know that you have her back for whatever she wants to do after she checks out the info for herself. Explain to her, nicely, that you only wanted to tell her because you think she deserves to know the stuff you accidentally found in case there is a problem. She will probably be hurt and might do something silly so relax if she gets angry or something. Be nice and polite. Nobody likes to be told they've been used.
Suggest to her that maybe your dad didn't go through with meeting these people. Maybe couple's counseling will help them resolve this. It's possible he got the wrong impression from last time and thought that this behavior was acceptable between him and your mother after all. Encourage her to confront your father after she personally sees the proof for herself though.
It's possible that they had an adult discussion and decided it was OK for their marriage for him to communicate with men online like this. It's possible that she had absolutely no clue that this still is happening. It's possible that she knows but is so clueless and scared that she is pretending not to see it.
Steps:
Let mom know details and encourage her to see for herself.
Talk with her, help her cope with this and figure out a plan of action.
Let your parents handle it.
If your mother chooses not to do anything then then you do have to step back. There is only so much a child do. Let your mom know, support her, and then back off.
After this, try to stop snooping through your father's things. If your mother decides to let this slide then there isn't anything that will help by continuing to look through his things. That will just be hurting you by knowing the problem still exists. Try your hardest to stop looking through his personal things and put this information behind you after your mother decides what she is going to do. Again, there is only so much a child can do in a marriage. You simply cannot save it if they don't want it saved. You can't fix it if they deny there is something broken, you know? Try to make this the last time you snoop.
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I'll say this first, I think piercings stink. My industrial bar, in my opinion, freakin' reeks. I go my nipples done (female) about two months ago, they're pretty much healed, still crusting up a bit, but the infection is gone. In short, I find them to be a bit stinky, and this is not an area where I can tolerate that.
I clean them daily in the shower with Dial soap.
Is this normal, if not, tell me pleeassee. (link)
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Dial soap is actually pretty terrible to use on any piercing, new or old. It prevents the healing process from taking place properly by killing off healthy cells as well as unhealthy ones. If you have more healthy cells than unhealthy then your body will take care of the work and avoid infection on it's own.
Only wash your nipples off with a saline solution. You can buy it or make it yourself, since it's pretty much diluted sea salt water. Ask your pharmacist about some saline solution. I think I bought mine when my nipples were pierced for something like $3 for a huge bottle.
Yes, they will stink. That's your body trying to heal over and over again. That's dead cells getting caught in the piercing hole. That's just you. That's what humans do. Dead skin cells = smelly. That's natural. It happens. You can't really avoid it.
Nipples actually take way longer than 2 months to heal up properly. You won't be completely healed for nearly a year. It's a very complex piercing in a very sensitive area. The piercing is constantly being pushed on, moved, hit, scrubbed, etc. so it takes about a year to fully heal from the inside out. After the healing process is over then the smell may be reduced some but it won't go just go away.
Rinse it off decently with the saline solution (and ONLY the saline solution) but make sure you wash the areas surrounding it like usual. You can lightly move your bar back and forth slowly to help get the saline solution moving into and out of the piercing for cleanliness.
The crusting? Well, I had mine in for quite some time, until they were fully healed at least, and the crusting doesn't ever end. Some days you'll see more than others. Sometimes you'll forget it ever has that issue. The crusting is just your nipples discharging the dead cells inside. You'll experience it 10 years after getting them done as far as I was told. It is just the natural process of the body, again.
Other than that, you're just going to have to deal with it. Piercings usually smell pretty terrible. All of them. Ever smell somebody's ears that were gauged? Smells pretty terrible. It's because the body has some dead cells there. That's why they have to rinse them out at least once a day to help with the odor. Whoever tells you it doesn't smell is just a flat-out liar because it's what the human body does. Shed dead skin cells. And the bar moving all of the time (even when you just don't notice it) helps to shed those dead cells even faster.
Yep.
Saline solution only.
Wait it out.
Deal with it.
That's about it.
And, yeah, I have some pretty decent experience with that. I had something like 14 piercings total by the end of my lunatic faze.
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FEMALE.
okay, me and my boyfriend have been going out for nearly a year. I really do love him and everything and he wants to be with me forever. We plan to get a flat together after he finishes college and it sounds like such a great future.
Exept sometimes, I feel as if i dont like him as much and that i want to be with other people. Its just that, i lost my virginity to him so i feel like if i am with him forever, I will never get to sleep with another person or have different sexual experiences. I dont want to dump him though because i love him more than anything in the world and i know it would tear us apart if i did. He crys sometimes because he thinks i will dump him but other times i feel he doesnt apreciate me :S please please please help (link)
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If sex is the deciding factor then it's time to break it off for the boy's sake.
Seriously.
Love should be more important than getting to sleep with 10 guys. You don't usually realize that until you've done the damage and can't turn back the clock.
But if it's more important and you're worried then that's the truth of it. There's no point in hanging on to a boy when you want to be free to sleep with other people. You end up encouraging yourself to cheat and begin a cycle of hurting this guy over and over (and yourself in the process, but you won't see that at first).
Get out now so he can heal and move on and you can do whatever it is that you think you want to do. You're causing him pain right now by just hanging on to something you truly, deep down inside, don't want at this point. Let him go.
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What soap should i use (link)
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I like to use Desert Essence Castile Liquid Soap with Organic Tea Tree Oil in the shower as my body wash.
I prefer Kiss My Face Obsessively Organic Self Foaming Liquid Soap (Grapefruit & Bergamot) for my regular hand soap.
We also keep a bar of dial soap handy for guests who do not prefer foaming soaps.
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17-f
okay so i had sex for the first time about three weeks ago and like two days ago my vagina has been feeling weird. the guy i had sex with had sex with 5 other girls and now im questioning like if i have an std now or what? but wouldnt i be able to tell if i did have one? its not like it hurts its just really itchy and it feels tingy. my mom didnt change any of the detercant in the laundry so i know its not my underwear. and its just constantly bothering me its not like it stops and goes away. do i need to go to a doctor something? because i dont want to tell my mom because thats weird and dont you have to call a doctor and wait like forever to get in? and i dont have money and im sure you have to pay in order to have someone check you out right? i also think im getting my period probably next week and im wondering that its bothering me because of that? but it usually doesnt. does anyone have any suggestions or am i overreacting?
thanks! (link)
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This could be anything from a yeast infection to a serious STD or HPV.
You need to get checked out by a doctor. When something like that doesn't feel right it's because your body is telling you that something is wrong.
You should tell your mother just because she can make the appointment calls for you. You don't have to though. Many cities and towns have health departments that help cater to women who need to be checked out but don't have money to pay for a gynecological visit. It isn't the best treatment but they can sure find the problem and help you with a solution. The best appointment I've ever had was when I was having financial problems in college and had to see a nurse practitioner at the local health department. She was very nice about the whole situation.
Now, anyway, simply call them and see if they can provide you some assistance. Let them know you had sex with someone who has had multiple partners and that you may have contracted something from them. You should request a full STD test. Tell them about your symptoms so they know what sort of appointment to book you under (ie: a pap smear too).
It may be nothing. It may be something. It's better to find out now than 5 years later. Look up your local health department number and see if they can help. If they can't they might be able to help you figure out what to do.
Telling your mom and getting it over with isn't too bad though. She knows you're a teen and probably has expected you to be experimenting by now in this crazy world. She probably wouldn't react nearly as bad as you may be thinking, especially if you were being mature and saying, "I need to get checked out because I may have made a poor decision." You know?
Hope everything turns out well!
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Why everybody is now worrying about bottled water in the sun and then go down to mc donalds or burger king for a meal when the cows they were made from are milking cows to drugged up and tired to even live is beyond me.
So my question is:
Why is the government, FDA and Monsato slowly killing everybody with their toxic food.
And why are people to stupid to see it. (link)
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I want to laugh at a previous comment about life expectancy. You, questioner, are completely right in your asking.
The upcoming generations are expected to not live as long as the current ones. Eek. Kind of does sound like life expectancy is going down. Fast-food is flourishing at the same time. Oh, and let's not forget our wonderful scientific medicines that have "improved" our lives in recent years. But we're still expected to live a shorter lifespan than our parents!
We are being fed what the media tells us to buy into. We're told to worry a lot about bottled water in the sun. We're not told to stop buying McDonald's food (otherwise why are there so many commercials being slammed at you on T.V., right?).
Obesity is a problem! Instead of drinking a large milkshake just drink a medium one! Not a solution. HELLO! Stop making it if you care about us. Stop selling it to us on T.V. commercials and billboards.
I answered a recent question about fluoride and the answer is the same here.
Money.
If you make a person sick by selling them X then you can make them well by selling them Y. You make double the profit if you would have just sold them something good. Healthy people don't buy as much junk, medications, and assisted living things.
Vegetarians? Live longer! Who would have thought, right?! The scary fact is that they aren't the healthiest people either because we're pouring pesticides and flavor enhancers on our fruits and vegetables too. They're just healthier than meat eaters because they ingest less of the bad stuff by eating no meat. If we didn't have such harmful chemicals and we used our science to seriously just improve our lives then...I couldn't image how long we could possibly live. Possibly well past 100 on average.
Ok...example...
Let's say...(please do note the made up numbers for ease of understanding)
A cow costs $100 to raise until it's time to kill it for meat. An average cow weighs 100lbs. When you sell a cow you make $200.
If you can inject something into a cow for $20 that will cause it to be, on average, 200lbs then you just made a huge profit. You just made a $120 cow investment into a $400 sell.
See? Money. Big bucks without extra work.
Now, we know that things are not so great. The media has to throw something at us to keep us occupied on one bad thing. That way we won't go fishing around for other things to complain about. Oh, Paris Hilton did this, that, and the other this week. Lindsey Lohan is in jail again. Racism is getting worse, better, or is stable. Whatever it is, they have to throw us something.
Bottled water. Boom. There's something to be afraid of.
We start to overlook things.
I have a real-life experience of this. Remember the huge peanut butter recall? Did you know that it the exact same time that they found mercury in high fructose corn syrup? Seriously. It was announced the same exact week but it was overshadowed because the media wanted to overlook that. So, for awhile they focused on peanut butter. They knew that wouldn't last though so they set us up to focus on the next subject--Mercury contamination. I saw it with my own eyes. Now we're worried about mercury in soda but we weren't when it was first announced. Not at all. What was that? 2 years ago now?! Please!
So, it's just a chain. Something to keep us occupied while they sweep more things under the rug so they can make more money. Yeah. I sound insane now so I'll shush.
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So on the toothpaste if you swallow it you should call poison control but most of American drink the stuff in the tap water.
Swallowing it is just as bad as brushing it into your gums.
Over 20.000 dentists petitioned against the use of it so why is it still in the water and in the toothpaste. ??????????? (link)
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Fluoride. Wow. What an evil, evil substance.
Where do I even begin?
I know where!
Check out the film title The Fluoride Deception.
It seriously is nothing but the government trying to get rid of a deadly toxin. What do they do with it? If they release it into the air, the animals die (just watch the film; it's heartbreaking). If they toss it into the waters, the animals die! If they dig a hole and pour it into the ground to be covered up...the animals die!
So, what do they do with it? It's a byproduct of many factories. They can't just stop it from being produced. Heck, it's not even intentionally produced.
Then, suddenly, someone found out that it hardens bone. Actually, it starts to grow small masses onto the bone. Pretty much cancer. But that small masses? Wow, gee golly, it makes it harder for your teeth to rot out of your head!
So, they found a use for the substance that people bought. Nobody wants to lose their teeth. Nobody wants painful cavities. The government bought the "solution" and told the people of the nation that it would HELP them. People began to use the product in their toothpastes and realized that it did do what they said it would.
Now, look up dental fluorosis. Pretty ugly, huh?
Those white specs on your teeth? Even I have them now. That's the start of it. It isn't natural.
Truth is? A lot of people are suffering from that and it's because they've been taught that fluoride is not harmful. Sure, a regular toothpaste may not seem like it has much on it. But, like you're saying, how much rat poison do you really want to ingest? Say 1 ounce of rat poison a day makes your hair really thick and pretty. Sounds, great! But we know what too much does.
The body doesn't just throw away harmful chemicals. You don't just go to the bathroom and expel toxic chemicals like fluoride, chlorine, or mercury. Your body stores them because it doesn't know what the hell to do with it. Suddenly, you have fat cells harboring these insane substances. You're sick. You start to see signs of poisoning.
Brush your teeth three times a day with fluoride. Floss with fluoridated floss. Drink 8 glasses of fluoridated water a day. Gee golly, it sure is adding up! We're not even taking into account the food that is prepared with the stuff, the livestock we've give fluoridated water to that we kill and eat, or the fact that you bathe in the junk every single day (sometimes more than once).
It has been suggested that the fluoride in our water supply is slowly killing us. Believe it or not, they don't have a real reason to drink it. Honestly. Nobody's right arm rots off because they had a cavity in their arm, if you know what I mean. They don't have a reason to put it in our water supply. The problem is that we, as a nation, trusted our leaders to keep us safe. When they said it was safe to put on our teeth we believed them. We didn't see immediate negative effects so we continued to use it. When they suggested to put it in our water supply we didn't object because we still trusted them and hadn't seen negative effects.
It's just one of those things. Most people don't take the time to question or research things like this. They believe what the leaders tell them. They feel that the rest of us, who actually care about what we are putting into our bodies, are insane, whacko conspiracy theorists.
Why do you think pharmaceutical companies are booming right now? What about those negative possible side effects like, oh I don't know, death. Seriously! Herpes medication can even cause death. But we're told to take it and that it will help. We put too much trust into those people. Having herpes is worse than the possibility of painful death? Man...
So, your answer is that more people believe it will do good for us because they have believed the leaders of America. They haven't seen the truth face-to-face. They don't take the time to think for themselves. They just kind of go with the flow. When their teeth suffers from problems like fluorosis more dentists will offer dentures, bleaching, crowns, and whatever else they can make a quick buck by before ever saying, "Oh, uh...stop brushing your teeth with that junk..."
Money.
Telling people that if they watched what they ate, reduced their sugar intake dramatically, and lived a healthy lifestyle that they wouldn't suffer much serious tooth decay doesn't sell you more stuff. Causing people to suffer means you can make money by "helping" them later. If you can trick them into believing sugar is a great antioxidant (or whatever label you want to slap on it) and that they should eat 8 full bars of candy coated chocolate bits a day for optimal health then that's more money for you in the long run when their teeth start to rot off and they begin to experience problems like diabetes.
The dollar. Money. Moolah. The quick buck. Cold hard cash.
BP has an oil spill and people hate them for killing wildlife. After watching the above mentioned film, could you imagine the rioting that would happen if the government started to release this fluoride toxin into our air? How would they get money then, right? People would start to distrust them.
Man...I could just go on and on...but I'll stop here. For now.
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Hi tonight i was ordering something online. I pressed the submit button once it did not work for a while and i pressed it again. It turned out to put my order through twice when i only wanted one. I tried to call the store but they are not open until monday. I tried to put the tracking number in and theres no such number..im guessing it didnt get processed since the store isnt open. Im wondering will i be able to cancel the purchase and get my money back? The card is a debit card by the way.
Thanks! Im so worried! (link)
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It's OK. It happens all of the time.
If the company pays attention to the orders then they'll probably know right away what happened and will cancel the second one. You don't want to wait for that though in case they accidentally skip over the mistake.
Call them the first thing Monday morning. Find out their hours online and give them a call as soon as they are open. Simply explain that your mouse clicked the send button twice in the browser window when you were completing your order and that you want to get that straightened out.
The package shouldn't be in transit yet then so you will catch them before they send it off, hopefully. If they are confused simply request that they refund the funds to your account since you only wanted to make one ordering purchase and not two.
I'm certain they handle this all of the time though so don't be ashamed or afraid. They'll probably just say, "OH! Ok, we'll take care of that right away!" Don't forget to thank them for helping you out in the end, by the way.
Relax for now. The charge may not even been applied to your account yet. If you don't have online banking then when you speak to the representative of the company (customer service) then they will be able to bring up your account and see what charges have been made so far.
Everything will work out just fine if you call them as soon as they are open. Don't worry too much. It happens. We all make mistakes like that.
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i think im bipolar or something, my mom is in complete denial of it but i need help. what do i do now, is there a pill or something to fix me? please. haha (link)
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You have to be diagnosed by a professional before anything can be done. Chances are, you really aren't bipolar. If you're under the age of 18 then it could very well be hormonal changes in you body that is causing you to act out or feel abnormal.
See a counselor, therapist, or psychologist to get started on medication.
Will medication fix you? Not really. It's a very complex (may be inherited, may be from substance abuse, may be even imaged; it's just "one of those things") disorder so, chances are, you will always live with the problem (if you are, in fact, really bipolar). It would be a life-long medication that you would always need to take. Bipolar isn't curable. It doesn't just vanish. If you ever get "cured" then it's highly likely you were misdiagnosed to begin with.
Bipolar disorder is being overly diagnosed in many people, especially young people. It's better to not jump the gun and assume that something is wrong with you and that you NEED pills to make you feel different. Try to change your lifestyle, eating habits, exercise routines, etc. before concluding that you need professional help. Many therapists are only after money, sadly, and will prescribe you medication so that you become a lifelong or long-term patient of theirs.
Be smart, be safe, and try to give your body time to adjust to new changes. Live as clean of a lifestyle you can. Realize that everyone has bad days and bad moods. You don't want to live with such a disorder so don't dwell on the possibilities.
The fact is, we all have symptoms of multiple psychological disorders. That's the truth. The problem is that we need to accept that we're all flawed beings. Having one, two, or even three symptoms doesn't mean you're abnormal or broken. Really.
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