Maybe both. Guys are definately very immature at that age, and unfortunately for many many years longer. Sigh! Anyway, tell him to grow up and figure out a nicer way to flirt. He is probably insecure and confused by his own feelings, and really just a silly little boy still, with hormones driving him insane. Don't put up with any crap, you gotta teach him what is acceptable and not acceptable behavior in flirting. Something all guys have to figure out, and they will only get it eventually from practice, trial and error, especially the error part. Yeah, he likes you, but don't let that be a reason to take crap either.

You want what you can't have, and you are taking Brad for granted while fantasizing about Mark who dumped you, remember? The moment you dump Brad, you will realize that you are throwing away a good guy for a fantasy. Mark cares only about Mark and will always be selfish...I know bad boys make our hearts skip a beat, but they come with a heavy pricetag and later tears. Give a nice guy a chance, and he will eventually make your heart skip a beat, too...without later ripping it out and stomping on it on the way to another prospect.

It is normal to be a little jealous, but not normal to strangle someone or show violent behavior of any kind. Do not let this girl control you or your life. If she wants to be with you and you with her...which you should think about, then start setting limits and boundaries. Tell her she does not get to dictate how you live and who you talk to. She gets to be your girl if she accepts and trusts you and your choices. If she is too insecure and psycho to handle it, then dump her and be glad to be rid of her.

Keep it simple and fun. Kids love to be creative and get involved in everything. How about a craft or activity for them to be a part of the whole thing? The parents would LOVE for you to give a gift of your time to the girls...maybe free babysitting so the parents can go shopping or out to lunch? The girls get to play with you and you can bring a different toy each time to play with or paint toenails or a game the girls like. Time is the best gift!

He is just a guy, so remind yourself that he is not some prince or fantasy man. He does gross guy things, says stupid stuff, probably would piss you off if you knew everything he said and did, and he is lucky to have someone as cute and cool as you to give him your time and affection. Confidence is more sexy to a guy than shyness, so if you are serious about winning him over, then stop acting like a girl and act like a young woman who is worth looking at twice. Turn on the charm and show no mercy, because you don't get many chances to make an impression.

Make sure that your partner/girlfriend is wanting to makeout before you go pouncing on her. Keep it slow and simple. Girls love a guy who is slow and notices how she is responding. You are very young still, so don't rush yourself. A lot of guys will lie or exaggerate about how much they have done, and believe me, these are usually the guys who are the lamest. Everything good is worth waiting for, and I know many guys that waited until after highschool to have serious girlfriends/sex, etc. and these guys were HOT and glad they waited. There is no way and no need to practice. Just pay attention to who you are with and set the pace together. Girls can be aggressive in this area (I've heard ;)...) so let this type of girl know you want to savor every moment and not rush it...which is regrettable for both.

Everyone can develop habits, and they can be harder for some to break depending on the challenges of the specific person and habit. Chemicals in our brains that make us feel good sometimes occur right after having pain. The cutting provided you with this feeling. It released tension and then soothed you chemically. There are a million other ways to get this stress relieval and soothing chemical release. Excercise is an easy one to try. If you can start running for 20 minutes everyday, you will enjoy the results. An addiction is something that we get immediate gratification from, usually without thinking about the consequences. It is usually about feeling good or stress relieval. Addictions can take over your life if we do not continually make a decision to say no to the addiction and yes to something better for us. Life is about balance, so find something that will take the place of what you once relied on. Make sure it is something positive and healthy. A person who chooses to constantly seek out addictions and behave in ways that do not promote whole being wellness are taking shortcuts to long term damage. The easy and fast fix is almost always the one we regret. All good things are earned through honest seeking and personal effort.

There is something to be learned from this experience and it is so important. You cannot please yourself and others simultaneously. Saying yes to one choice, is saying no to many others. I don't think that these smart people are impossible to say no to, I think you have a hard time saying no to them. You need to take responsibility for your choices or nothing will change. You can blame others for manipulating you, but you will know the truth. This is not a choice between love and money, but about keeping your word and commitments, and making the most of your time in a way that works to attain your goals. You can still work in some time with your guy and keep your commitment and make some cash. Next time you are asked to do something, tell them you will check your calendar and get back to them. Carry a little planner and make some dates with your guy that you keep free of other things. Life takes two things: Discipline and Balance. Take charge of your life and practice both.

Updated***
Wow, only 15years old? Well, you are obviously intelligent in some academia, but may lack social intelligence and the skills necessary to make friends in such a crowd of older students. First, admit you don't know everything. Remember that usually bored people are boring people. You may not like hearing that, but whatever. You need to take responsibility for the fact that you are not going to blend in and make friends as easily as some. So try harder! Get involved, talk to as many people as possible, and check out the various clubs and activities. There are so many social groups to choose from! Talk to your guidance counselor for more direction. If you are not happy, you won't do as well in school. Grades are important, but so many more things make life enjoyable...go out and don't give up!!!

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Are you a boring person? Seriously, ask yourself this question. What kind of person do you want to be? Think about it awhile, write about it. Make it happen. Life has ups and downs for sure, but you are ultimately responsible for how you live. Take charge and challenge yourself...get out of your comfort zone!

Marc is a grown up and you do not need to tell him what to think, but you can be honest about why you personally will not be friends with her. You made a mistake in listening to her rant on, without calling her on her harsh tone and cruel words. I would not be talking behind her back or planning another, "intervention" soon. She is already on the defensive and you would just be adding fuel to the fire. When people live in close quarters or community, they can sometimes become overinvolved in each other's lives. Set boundaries and the next time she starts to vent, you can tell her that unless the two of you can find a way to calmly communicate, you are not interested in being her soundboard. If she is truly a very irrational person, you need to be sure not to provoke her, and do your best to keep distance between you.

She is breaking the law, but do you go around turning everyone in that breaks the law??? I think you are just concerned because of her relationship to you. Do talk to her about your concerns and see if you can help her find other means of making a few extra bucks, because she could get herself into not only legal trouble, but physical danger. The wrong person might break into her house and harm her trying to steal the pot. We don't want that to happen. I don't think you should rat on her, but everyone gets caught or caught up in their own web eventually, and this is something that could affect you if you live with her. Talk with her, be careful, but do not be a hypocrite.

The offical name for what he has is called, "ownership of the house." It is absolutely none of your business how he and his wife decide to run their home and finances. Your "poor mother in law" chose this man, and can do what she wants. It is not for you to step in. Why you are staying with them, you need to be especially respectful of the way the two of them live, and not try to get inbetween them or even give your opinion. It may seem strange to you, but it has nothing to do with you and your life. Their home and marriage are their business.

Label Schmabel! What this really is about is you letting him have his cake and eat it, too! You want a commitment and he does not. That is the core truth and you have been lowering your standards to suite him and keep him. This will not work out for YOU. Either you have an open relationship where you are both comfortable being with other people or you start setting some real boundaries that you both agree on. If you are giving in to keep him, he won't respect you and you can't respect yourself. Better to leave him and leave yourself open to a man who will be thrilled to be yours alone!!!

What do you mean you expect periods before 15 days? Are they close together? Did you miss one? Mucus is not a period, so if you meant that you are 15 days late, you could be pregnant. Please clarify.

Straight and shiny will give you a polished and natural look. Guys are not into the too much hairspray look or heavy make-up, so keep both hair and face soft. Super fresh breath is a must...bring mints!!! Try different looks whenever you see him and maybe he will confess his favorite. Have fun!

You basically made yourself known to him, so now step back and don't push. Guys like a challenge, and though he was probably a little flattered, he will not be enticed any further if you are in his face too much. I would really try to expand your horizons and get to know some other guys. Don't misuse someone to make your crush jealous, but it does not hurt to have him see you as less available and holding other guys' interests. Do not chase this guy or waste time pining away. You can't make him like you, but you can give him room to see you in a new way.

You could ask him if he is serious with his girlfriend, but he most likely is. He could have broken up with her and asked you out by now, knowing that you liked him. I don't want you wasting time over this guy, if he does not return you feelings. You may really carry a crush for him forever...sometimes we humans carry multiple crushes for years. That should not mean the end of your life. He may or may not ever return your feelings, so if he does not right now, set it on a shelf and move on. There really might be someone else you will find you like even better. You are actually just starting out as a young adult, and things are really going to change for you in the next several years. Keep your options open.

You still need to report all the details of the abuse to the police if you have not already done so. Never ever put up with any form of verbal or physical abuse. End any relationship the moment anything like that is suspected. I don't know how well you know this Matt guy that showed up to save you, but you owe him a thankyou and nothing else. Not that violence is the answer to violence, but I wasn't there to judge, and I can't blame him for that reaction. Next time you meet a guy that reminds you of the violent boyfriend, turn around and walk away. Use this experience to make better choices for yourself in the future.

The question is what motivates you? Getting good grades? Candy? What reward can you think of to give yourself for a job well done. Work for 20 minutes and break for five? Figure out your own plan based on what you love. The hardest part is getting started, and so tell yourself it is just for 10min then a quick break or snack or something. Set a timer. Make a habit out of it and start and stop at the same time everyday, somewhere you won't get distracted.

A bit of everything. It was none of your friend's business in the first place to ask such a private question about your sister, and it was not your place to give him an answer. He was being a jerk for calling her a slut and more of a jerk for denying it. You should have kept it to yourself though, and not gossiped further to Brandon. Now your sister has probably heard that someone called her a slut...real nice. You and your friend need to learn from this, and make the appropriate apologies to your sister. These little mistakes can be avoided in the future if you remember to set boundaries when it comes to privacy, especially someone else's. Now take care of your part of it.

"Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person they are almost indistinguishable. To say something you value deeply to another and to have him or her value it equally by listening to it carefully and apppreciatively is the most universal way of exchanging social interest or demonstrating affection." David Augsburger, CARING ENOUGH TO HEAR AND BE HEARD.


All sincere persons will be given thoughtful examination and reply. Please be specific about your situation as it applies to your question, the applicable information and facts necessary for me to properly assess your situation and give you the benefit of my knowledge and experience, which includes: experience/education with mentoring, relationship study, self help, spirituality, poetry, literature, philosophy, psychology, color theory, teaching, parenting, and debate that will be used to your advantage. I am concerned with offering an objective and realistic perspective more than ratings, because this will help YOU. Artificial sweetness is found in diet soda, not in my advice. If you feel that I did not understand your question or need more specifics to help, please let me know, but while all truth is subjective, questioners should be mature enough to hear answers not necessarily agreed with. If you are only looking for someone to tell you just what you want to hear, then you may not be ready for my advice. I believe in personal responsibility, self and other awareness and your power and ability to recreate and redirect your own life. All our misery and joy begins and ends within ourselves, but our willingness to be open can bring the positive or negative energy we seek. If you or someone you know is open to positive help, the resources and caring individuals needed are available now.

http://www.coolnurse.com/

http://www.4woman.gov/violence/

http://www.childhelpusa.org/about/programs-and-services/childhelp-national-child-abuse-hotline-1-800-4-a-child

drug/alcohol abuse help go here: http://www.4drugabuse.com/addiction-treatment.html

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/1800-273-TALK(8255)
The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is a 24-hour, toll-free suicide prevention service available to anyone in suicidal crisis. If you need help, please dial 1-800-273-TALK (8255). You will be routed to the closest possible crisis center in your area. With over 120 crisis centers across the country, our mission is to provide immediate assistance to anyone seeking mental health services. Call for yourself, or someone you care about. Your call is free and confidential. -----------------------------------

http://www.kidscrisis.com/

http://www.teenadviceonline.org/gethelp/numbers.html

You can call the National Sexual Assault Hotline, operated by RAINN, 24 hours a day, free & confidential. 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)

For info. on birth control etc.
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/

The Girls and Boys Town National Hotline is the only hotline that children and parents can call with any problem at any time:
Open 24-hours a day, every day at 1-800-448-3000

Spanish-speaking counselors available; translation services for 100+ languages

TTY line available for the hearing-impaired at 1-800-448-1833

Counselors can help find services and agencies in the callers' local community

Help at the End of the Line
Callers talk to highly-trained, professional counselors who listen and give "right now" answers. They're sympathetic people who have expertise dealing with these and other problems:

depression

suicide

running away

parenting problems

relationship concerns

physical, sexual, and emotional abuse

chemical dependency

mental health

anger

aggressive behavior

Toll Free
Operated by Father Flanagan's Boys' Home, hotline services are free of charge to every parent and child in all 50 states, the District of Columbia, U.S. territories, and Canada.

Toll-Free: 1-800-448-3000

http://www.sex-ed101.org/links.html

http://www.anorexicweb.com/anorexicweb.html

Report Child Abuse
Childhelp USA National Child Abuse Hotline
1-800-4-A-CHILD TDD: 1-800-2-A-CHILD



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All our motivations stem from two: Love or Fear. When in turmoil or indecision, ask yourself from which of these you are acting. If you want an honest response outside of yourself, you need to first be honest within yourself. Bless you on your journey!

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