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November 26, 2012

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I'm Jessie. I've been on here on and off for about 7 years. I'm 22 :) I am currently in my final year of college studying English and new media
I'm from Ireland I dye my hair way too much. I've been blonde,brown,brown with blonde,black,red,and blonde again!I love helping people I found advicenators when I was just 15 and didn't understand the world! I feel I have matured with this site. The people on here are amazing and I love coming on here in my spare time to be there for people in need. I won't tell you what you want to hear because that's not advice it's just fooling yourself. I try to help in whatever way I can I try not to judge and try to relate to a situation if I can. :) If you don't like honesty then you won't like my advice.
If you're kind enough to rate me please leave a comment letting me know if I helped! I love hearing that I have!
Please try to use proper grammar and be coherent.

I have been featured 4 times. :)

advice

I was wondering how you start your own forum on here. Thanks =]

Im not sure what you mean by fourm..do you mean column?..like where you have your own pages displaying questions & answers?..because if thats what you mean basicly you just answer peoples questions and they get displayed on that page and you can customize it anyway you want and add backrounds and stuff.
hope i helped? im not totally sure what you mean though so if u could post additional info or if theres anythin else u need to know please ask (;

Iam 20 years old and I have a problem with trusting people a little bit to easy and I want to know how to be not so trusting?

Okay well the key is to get to know a person first and make sure you know them well before you start trusting them with anything major.
dont go telling people you barely know or have just met problems or secrets and such because maybe they seem nice its hard to tell those who mean well from those who dont so take the time to build up a good sense of trust and even then always be catious,
the best people to trust are friends youve known a very long time and your family =]
think about what your about to tell a certain person before you do and you should be fine =]
but dont close off completely its good to have one or two people you can always rely on and trust.
hope i helped in any way
Much

My friend was talking to her boyfriend on MSN
and she was telling him she really liked him

and he wrote back
"I love you more than anything in the world and always will.we are both very lucky people. It hurst because I went up to 8mm in like a day lol"

WTF does thttt mean???
We didnt want to ask..we were so confused..
I dont even know if this is even in the right category

hmm i have no idea either..
you should ask him maybe its a typo?
hurst..im guessing is hurts..
and 8mm ive no idea.
if you find out inbox me maybe and let me know lol thats gonna kill me :P

16/f
ok well where do i start. i really think theres something wrong with me. that i am not noticing as much as others.

well heres the thing. my ex knows me better than i know myself and helps me realize so much about myself.

we were talking last nite and he was telling me to ignore people that get on my nerves. well i said, u know me, i cant ignore things. and he said "not being able to ignore things is a blind version of sumbody not knowing themselves, meaning no one does." and i totally agreed.

i DONT know myself. at all. and its really becoming a problem. thats part of the reason we broke up, because he thought that i was changing for him and for everyone else. which is true. but i cant stop doing it. i dont know who i am so i try to act like other people.

he also said, " i love you, but you act so different around so many people i find myself going who is she really? i was unsure of the girl i fell for." and i do it unconsciously sometimes and i no that i change for everyone. its like im trying to make everyone happy and impress them. as in im a different person to all of my friends. like when i met my best friend i started dressing just like her. (shes black) and i totally changed my style and started talking differently and acting like i didnt care about anything kind of like her. i am a really caring person but when i talk to her im just like yeah who gives a fuck, whatever, who cares. and i like the type of person she is so its not like im unhappy being like this because all this changing just kind of comes natural to me because i like impressing people so much. but it happens all the time, ive changed to be like different people many times.

i went through the jock, skater, hippie, and many more phases. im currently stuck in the "gangster" phase. maybe because my best friend and ex are black.

i dont know. but the thing is, i want to be friends with EVERYONE so i act like how i think the person would want me to act. i am part of every different cliche and i act different in every one of them. with the gangsters, i talk like im black, i wear ghetto clothes, and act like i dont give a fuck about anything. with the stoners i wear my bob marley stuff, talk really slow, and act chill with everything. with the popular people i always crack jokes, wear abercrombie, am really caring and act a little bitchy at times. i change like every month, but i still keep all my old friends, i just gain alot of new ones too but i dont think they like me for the real me, even though i dont even know who that is.

and believe me ive become amazing at this changing and i am friends with everyone in the school because im so good at doing this. but i need to stop. its ridiculous and i feel like im being fake. its become a habit and almost like a game. ive become friends with girls that my ex once dated, just so i could keep tabs on him. ive become friends with girls so they will hook me up with guys. ive become friends with guys to make girls jealous. i havnt become friends with half my friends just because i like them as a person. but i want everyone to like me and i love being so popular. i dont know what to do. like my ex said, if i dont know the real me, no one does. please helppp

ok one good thing about this whole situation is that your begining to realise it and wanting to change thats the first step towards helping to fix it.=]
so its like your taking on different personalities around different people there is a girl i know who used to have the exact same problem.
it is totallyy normal though for us teens to go through like a hundred different phases and labels before we find who we really are or where we "fit"
if you want to be friends with all theese people it shouldnt be a case of you changing your hair or clothes attitude or personality to fit in with them.
people respect you more if your someone who can just mingle in with everybody but still stay who you are.
your ex is spot on it what he said about if you dont know the real you no one does.
you just need help finding who you truely are ok like think
what do YOU like doing?
what kinda music do you like to listen to?
and whats your favourite style of clothing etc etc.. fav movies books tv shows..
think for YOURSELF not as anybody else or anyone your trying to be like this is the only way your going to find out about who you are.
If all of theese "friends" are true friends then they wont care about your appearence or personality etc they will like you for you and if they dont then they honestly arent worth wasting your time on they are fake friends..why would you wanna spend time with people like that?
people who like you for what your Pretending or posing to be. just forget about trying to impress and make friends and honestly just try concentrate on finding yourself and staying true to yourself, life will be alot less stressfull and dont worry about not having friends or fitting in i gaurentee you,you will =]
your ex seems to really understand so talk to him more and im sure he would be happy to help you in changing.
i hope i helped in the slightest i wish you the best and good luck!
Much

I really want to move towns but my mum doesn't want to. i haven't exactally asked her but she seems happy here. but i hate it. i get bullied at school constantly and i don't think i can learn well here. any advice? 13/F P.S im from australia.

I'm really sorry to hear about you getting bullied =[
but you should honestly talk to your mum about it nothing ever gets better if its left in the dark.
tell her whats going on and explain to her about how your not happy so something can be sorted it maybe not as irrational as moving towns because running away from your problems doesnt always fix them in reality.
if you tell your mum she can talk to the school and make the bullying stop.
I know it seems scary the thought of it but if you dont do anything and just run away from it theese cowardly low life bullies are going to continue being this way to other people.
if you try to sort it out,and you are still really unhappy why not consider moving schools? if there are any other in the area rather then towns?
Im really very sorry to hear whats happening and i hope everything gets better and works out for you,and that i helped anyway in the slightest..please consider telling someone close about this.
;

Hello everyone i am kinda young im Ten years old and i need your help. I am getting white discharge,tummy cramps,moody,sleepy,and my brest are kinda tender. Are these simtoms of getting my period i need to know so i can be prepaired.
Thank you For Your Help Love,Gam906e

hey there =]
well theese are all the classic signs that your period is about to start but it still might not happen right away you could have theese symptoms for a while before your period actually comes and even then because you are so young you might just get one show and then nothing for a couple of months but everybody is different.
so i would make sure to have a packet of pads at home just incase.
and keep one in your schoolbag discretely just incase anything were to happen at school.
(its easier to use pads when your staring off then tampons..and because your so young)
you should talk to your mom or older sister if its too embarassing!or even an aunt or cousin or someone who could help =]

Okay, so i've been friends with this guy for over 2 years. We've both liked each other. He cares about me more, which is sad to say. I always find myself going up and down on whether i like him. Its like when i'm with him, i don't like him, but when i'm away from him i miss him so much. Also my parents won't allow me to go out with him. It's sad but i like his personality, but not so much his looks. I know its shallow, but honestly i just want to find a person that has a great personality and amazing looks. I've told this guy a numerous amount of times i won't go out with him, and we get into big fights, then we get close again. I'm just very confused when it comes to him. We've been through a lot, but i honestly think i deserve better...What should i do?

wow im in the EXACT same situation as you!
its like he has such an amazing personality and you know he would probably do anything for you but its just that attractiveness missing thats holding you back right?
i cant give you much advice because im honestly at a loss as of what to do myself im just tryna go with the flow and see what happens but im here if you need someone to relate to because i understand completely.
i often beat myself up over it because i know
looks arent everything though and its hard to find someone with both...but there has to be some kind of appeal to someone.
anywho sorry im rambling.. i guess what you should try do is do your best to look past it concentrate on his other amazing qaulites and maybe his personality will just shine through over his looks and he will seem attractive to you.
thats what im trying to do with my friend.
hope it works out for you its nice to know im not the only one in this kind of a situation or who thinks this way =]
i try think of that quote too..
"beauty captures the eyes but personality captures the heart"
i also try to think that nobody stays good looking forever.
hope i helped even in the slightest!

I attempted (for the first time) the smokey eye makeup look and I have no clue if it is right... so help me please to understand if it looks right (or some-what right? haha)

http://img32.imageshack.us/my.php?image=rscn2108.jpg

http://img193.imageshack.us/my.php?image=rscn2106.jpg

its not too extravagant, very subtle with some glitter.

please and thank you :)

thats really good for a first attempt =]
youve got really pretty eyes btw.
the more you do it the better you get at it try darker greys an silvers too. it makes it stand out more even incorperate the tinest bit of black its all about blending it together and giving it an even edgey finish =]
when im doing mine i always use the bourjous silver eyeshadow and wet an eyebrush just a bit before applying it makes it come out alot better.
then ive all different palletes and shades gosh i think is the brand but it doesnt matter and i go for a like half and half blended look if you get me. but what youve done is awesome just giving you a few ideas if you wanna try it out

ok well im 15 and a girl. and over the years that i have been growing up i have been at my grandparents house in indiana. and i live in illinois. i love it there. and my grandma one day told me about this kid who was moving in next door to her. he was the same age as me. he is a nice guy and he introduced me to his friend casey. hes a guy. and this was like 2 years ago. and i really thought he was cute and stuff. but my friend who was out there with me at the time liked him and they ended up like dating for like a day. ha which it didn\'t work out considering the different states we live in. but we left and every once in a while i would talk to casey on myspace and i always had this crush. but just about a month ago he ended up giving me his number and ever since we just hit it off. and we talked on the phone every night for a month. and we were just so into each other. but then like 2 weeks ago i went down to my grandpas house in indiana and we hung out. and he was just so amazing. and we ended up just cuddling on the ground and we ended up kissing. and it was my firstt kiss and he knew it too. but it was just a perfect moment. and then the next day, sunday, we had to go and he couldn\'t come and say bye because he had to help with his dad. and the whole day he just seemed weird. and that night he ended up telling me that we just weren't going to workout because of distance. and i just completely broke down. he was my first kiss and it ment so much too me. and he new that we lived in different states going into this. and he kissed me anyways. and i just haven\'t talked to him for awhile. and all i can do is think about him. but its getting better. but he was my first kiss and i know i will never forget him. which sucks. because he was so perfect.... what should i do?! heart breaks are so difficult.

Awh I know this situation totally sucks. but aleast you will always be able to remember your first kiss as a really special one with someone you cared about alot.
I know it hurts alot now but it will get easier with time and no doubt youl find someone just as nice nearer to you although to you it probably doesnt feel that way now but it will get better trust me your still trying to get over him.
its good that you wont forget him in a way because you can always look back and have something to smile about.
im afraid thats really all i can tell you =[
just keep your chin up and take each day as it comes and it will ease eventually focus on other things in your life.
hope everything works out for you and that i helped even in the slightest.

ok umm for like a while i stared sweating from my hands and i cant stop and now every time i shake someones hand it feels all wet does anyone know how i can stop sweating from my hands

i agree with the previous answer.baby powder should help but its nothing major you should worry yourself over chances are nobody would notice too much.

how to take care ofspiral perms

i really have no idea!? sorry!.

i'm 15 years old..just turned 15..and since i have a year until i'll need a car..i wanna save up as much as i can before my 16th birthday..from now til april 16th..it's a long time..but i still need to save up as much as i can and quick..but..the only problem is..since i dont have a car right now..my parent's wont drive me to a big town to work..( we live in a small town..the suburbs)..and no job close enough in town will hire anyone under 16...so..what are some good way's that i can save up money??

i totally feel your pain im the same age and live out of town too but my parents just started renting out a bar so i can work there for summer.
anyway what i did up until then was as much babysitting for people as i could! it really helps to save up and also save whatever money your mum and dad give you..
what i did a while ago was instead of going out for lunch at school i got up a bit earlier and made it from home but didnt tell my parents and still got my lunch money everyday for the week..! haha i know its kinda sneaky and going behind their backs but hey it works.
i told my parents afterwards and they werent mad..but then again that depends on your parents.
thats all really i can think of..or u could ask neighbours if theres any odd jobs theyd need doing to get some extra money.
hope i helped a bit!
x

i want to have sex and i'm not old enough.... why do i want to... whats wrong with me??

your just having sexual urges..totallyy normal its just your hormones =] it happens to all of us.
please dont give into sex too early though if your not old enough or ready!
&& dont ever be presured into it either.

i'm not really asking too much for advice, but more of an opinion and what you think. so heres my story (17f&17m):

i dated this guy for 8 months and we broke up the last week of april...he said he doesn't have the same feelings for me. however, we went to prom together and i was laying on this guy cause i wasn't feeling good and he was off doing his own thing...and he got upset at me for that...we both decided that itd be best for us not to talk until summer starts (which is in like a month from now) then he wants to start hanging out again as friends and he said "if its meant to be, it'll be". we started going out during the summer of last year and i was thinking of doing something cute when we hang out to realize why he fell for me last summer. i really love this kid and he treats me right. so what do you think i should do with this whole situation..is there anything that can boost our chances of getting back together?

oh and should i text him first when school ends? and how long should i wait? or should i let him text me?

Okay i dont understand why you both decided not to talk until summer starts how would that make a difference?..
or is it a case of giving each other space to find out if you truely like each other..the whole absence makes the heart grow fonder type thing?
i dont think theres anything you can really do to boost the chances only be yourself as you always were and maybe he will realise that he still does have feelings for you and that he doesnt wanna let you go.
id say give it a week after school ends and see if youve heard from him by then if not just casually text him to see how he is.
good luck i hope it works out for the best between you two let me know how things turn out =] hope i helped a bit anything else you need advice on or wanna know please ask

It kinda goes like this:

babyyy youuuu
youuu got what i neeeeeeeddd
but you say he's just a friend..
you say he's just a friend

It'd help me out if you had an idea :P

Biz Markie- Just a Friend
i think =] hope i helped!
youtube it and see

I'm a girl,16.
Ok so I sorted out the last problem,thank you very much for all your help.
Now though,I like this guy. The guy I've liked for well..years.
I REALLY likie him,the first guy I have liked this much in fact. I dunno if he likes me or not, he used to. We kissed a few months back,but it was his first kiss so afterwards,nothing else happened I guess cos he was too shy to initiate anything and I didn't wanna push him into anything he wasn't ready for so neither did I.
I haven't a clue if he still likes me,but I like him as much as I ever did. For the past while,I've been considering telling him that I still do,but we talk the whole time and hang out quite a lot (We go to the same school so we see each other everyday) so I don't want it to turn out bad if I DO tell him. There's only like ten days left in school and I'm wondering,should I just be honest and tell him straight,or keep it to myself and enjoy being friends with him?

Thanks to anyone who helps.

i would say go for it if you like him that much =]
youve got nothing to loose, if you dont youl be wondering what would have happend and youl kick yourself over it.
hes probably very shy aswell and he could be feeling exactly how you are and is just waiting for you to do something.
i know theres always that fear factor and like risk he wont feel the same but at least youl know you gave it a shot =]
good luck i hope it all works out for you.

Alright, so last summer I went out with this guy, and hes like a druggie, well i liked him. and he said he'd stop smoking for me. Well then he shows up to hang out with me high. This made me mad, sort of like telling me i'm worthless to him. Well, I wouldn't have been mad if he hadn't had said he wouldn't smoke for me. Well, we broke up like a week later over this and a bunch of other stuff. Well my friend hangs out with his friends and oneday he was there. She asked about me, and she asked him if he liked me, and he smiled and looked away, and later talked about getting back together with me. Well I reallyyy don't like the fact that he smokes. and I do like him, because hes really hot and funny and sweet. Well he started talking to me agian. And I know that if I want to go back out with him then we will. Its pretty much up to me. But I don't know what to do. I think I like him. But he smokes, and he clearly won't be able to stop. what should i do?!

i was in the EXACT same situation as you just a couple of weeks ago!
i hated it so much but i said ok il try look passed it and make it work..and he did his best not to smoke and even mention the stuff around me but we somehow always ended up arguing over it and in the end i broke it off with him because he turned out to be only interested in getting sex off me.
so what you need to look at is they other traits in his personality that you can concentrate on more. for example how funny he is and stuff
does he treat you well?
is he not just after the one thing?
does he make you happy?
do you have fun with him?
is he a good guy that just happens to have a problem with smoking?
or do you feel hed be a bad influence on you?
like would he ever try to get you to smoke with him?
ask yourself those questions and it should tell you what to do
you should do a pros and cons type thing to help you make your mind up
but if its something you truely feel you cant live with then hes probably not the one for you.
good luck with whatever you choose to do hope i helped a bit.

me and my friend both like the same guy.... she dosnt know i like him but i know she i like him. she always talks about how much she think she loves him. me and him have been going out secretly. she just thinks we're friends. she told me scince we're such good friends if i could ask him out for her. i dont want to hurt her feeling, i feel guilty i'm dating her crush. she's been my bffl ever scince i knew her,and he said he likes both of us..... what should i do?

Okay this is always a tough situation to be in.
what you need to ask yourself is who is more important to you?
would you wanna totally destroy a your friendship for the sake of going out with this one guy for a couple of motnhs?
is it worth it?
in my opinion i think you are both better off staying clear of this guy because he is only gonna come between you two. i know you both might really like him but trust me plenty more will come along and your not always gonna like the same guys.
its your choice but if you truely think this guy is worth all the hassle..then you should talk to your friend and try explain to her that you didnt set out to hurt her feelings and that it just happend.
good luck with whatever you do hope it all works out =]

NOTE: IM IN A RUSH SO SOME OF THE GRAMMER AND WORDS MAY NOT MAKE SINCE..and MIGHT BE STRAIGHT RUBBISH
im a 10th grader and the talk around school in my grade is who has had sex or not.. i mean its not a big deal but like...i wanna know who has or not..wel me and my best friend jesse..know alot of people who have and they tell us in secret..but i always tell him even though i promised that person i wouldnt say anything..and i thought he told me everyone he knows..but latley theres this other girl he hangs out with and me and her are cool too..but she told him that her and her boyfriend have and he never told me.. i asked him if they have a couple of times because they are always just there..kissing..he always says no..well like 3 days ago two of my other best friends told me that she had told them on two different occasions and one of them said that the girl had told him too...so i was in shock that he never told me..and i asked him about it the next period and he said he didnt know..and i just walked away because i knew he was lying..and well i just said..i see how you are..and he said fine dont believe me..well i let it go and today while i was on the phone with him..i told him just to tell me if he knew because i already knew they have..he still said no..and played like he didnt know for like 10 mins...finally he confused and said he did know but he just didnt want to tell me.. I find him as my best friend and i tell him everything i know..i mean everything..and i just feel like he isnt telling me everything..

what should i do..should i stop telling him my secrets..what do you think..and
ps
he lies like ALOT so yeah..idk if i should trust him anymore
19 minutes ago

I totally agree with the previous answer.
you cant be trusted either if you tell peoples secrets like that.
did you ever think maybe its you he cant trust?becuase youd go blabbing it around the place.

Well im not sure why but i like this kid that is 13, im am 15 will be 16 in june. He doesnt act like he is this young and is really sweet. Is it bad that i like him??? what should i do?? Plus if anyone finds out do you think that i would have a bad rep at my high school??

No its not bad at all in my opinion.
it annoys me how ages makes such a difference at our age now but its practicly meaningless when people are like 30 or 33.
i was with a 17 year old for a while (im 15 too) then he turned 18 a little while after and he sudenly didnt wanna be involved with me cos he said i was too young!? but he really liked me it didnt make any sense to me at all..it shouldnt matter if you like someone.
i dont think youl get a bad rep as such but there is always gonna be people that will talk and gossip. thats just life how you take it and deal with it is another matter if they wanna talk let em? after all its their time their wasting you shouldnt care what they think =]
your not doing anything bad you cant help who you fall for
anyway thats my advice its your decision though.
hope it works out

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