about

Many of my friends say that I am a good listener and advice giver. Because I have experienced many good and bad situations, I know what it is like to feel down or confused. I am a mother, daughter, sister, girl friend, and friend. And if I can't figure out how to answer a question, I'm sure I know someone who can. And I've come to notice that most of the questions people ask they already know the answer to, they just need a little reassurance. But I will warn you that my policy is, if you ask a stupid question, you will get a stupid answer. But i will say that it is my joy to help anyone with a real problem, so ask away!




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advice

Well...It started out as:
This guy IMed my friend and she added him to a chat we were having.Well after my friend left we started talking and he gave me his other screen names. We talked/talk everyday. Well, we got really close...and now I think I may be starting to develop feelings for him.

Is it wrong that I might like him as more than a friend if I've never met him face to face? I don't know if I should...because...well,I'm almost positive he is NOT a paedophile...but one can never be to sure. I don't want to get hurt like that, but I just want to know if its wrong to have a little crush on him.

no there is nothing wrong with having a little crush on him. i just wouldnt trust meeting him because you never know....

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See I have boys that are my friends and their best friends , but they both have a crush on me , but when they both found out that each other liked me and they stoped talking to each other, I like one but the other I don't want to hurt ,what do i do???!!!

explain to the one you dont want to hurt that you dont want to hurt him and that you still wanna be friends. its stupid for him to act the way he is because you guys have always been friends and you dont want to ruin that over something like this. he should be happy for the 2 of you. maybe you could even hook him with soemone else. good luck! :)

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my boyfriend and i have been together for almost 2 years now.. this year im going to be a senior in high school, and he's going into his sophomore year of college. he plays basketball, so sometimes during the season it is hard for us to be together. we made it through last year, but i just feel like im not really up to make it through this year. he lives like 20 minutes away down in the dorms. i really love him and dont want to break up, but what else can i do? i need attention haha... i feel selfish, but no.. im really just used to having him around whenever i need him. any tips, thoughts, suggestions?

just talk to him about trying to see you a little bit more often or you going to see him more often when there is time, then you did last basket ball season. explain to him that you need him. im sure he will understand sinceguys have been together so long, and he will probably want to see you more too.

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MY AUNT married this boys DAD so I guess you could say we are cousins? But not full blood? Well its the weirdest thing because I sorta do like him, and it's just a different feeling, and I know or like can tell that he sorta likes me too, but its sorta weird so we haven't said anything to each other, but does that make us cousins? If his dad married my aunt ??/ thanks!!!

no. you guys are only related by marriage not blood. technically if you wanted to see him it would be fine.

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hii.. im the gurl before that was askin about Nathan and smokin weed. i dumped him, but i got really stoned one night, and fell asleep.. and woke up naked but he wasn't there. I know we had to of had sex, cuz i was REALLLLLLLY sore down there.. and was bleedin but i didnt have my period, now i think im pregnant cuz i havn't got my period this month... i am s0o0o0 scared!! i've been non-stop crying.. like im only 14 years old!!! and i cant believe that happened... he is denyin anything happened but i dont believe him. Please, pretty please give me some advice on what to doo!! please i need help, i ratee!!!

signed,
scared and want help!

you know that is some fucked up shit that he did to you. im sorry that you had to experience something like that. but look, go buy a pregnancy test, and see if you are pregnant. if you arent, just stop stressing, because that is probably what is delaying your period. hope i helpd. and good luck! :)

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ok! last night my friend had a sleepover nd' there were guys and we all slept in the tent outside and i we were all like smushed together with not alot of room and this one really cute guy was layin next to me and when i went inside with *c* whos sleepover it was to change...everyone that was outside told that guy i was layin next to to do stuff with me like they even told him step by step n shit. and i didnt know that till later and then all of a suden he was up my shirt and we were layin closer and huggin and stuff. i didnt do nething with/to him tho. I really do like him but im 14 and hes 16 gunna be 17 in 6 months so idk if thats ok and should i be mad at my friends for setting that all up or not?

No, you shouldnt be mad at your friends. They were probably just tryna hook you up. Atleast yo are smart enough to know that 14 is too young to be doing things that are too sexual. If you like the guy, that is cool. Age is just a number. As long as he will respect the fact that you feel you are too young to go too far is all that matters. and when you are ready tog o farther, you will know.

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Hey there. Okay, I've been on birth control (Tri-Cyclen) for a week now ... and about 4 days into it I started getting cramps, and having diarrea. It continued like that for 2 days. I also have to pee like, every 15 minutes. lol. Is this normal, or should I talk to my doctor about it.

yeah this can be normal. sometimes it can take up to 3 months for your body to get used to the birth control. if the problems keeping persisting for a while and it becomes uncomfortable then i suggest you see a doctor, and maybe get the birth control changed to something more mild.

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alright..well ive been with ryan for now 6 months..and still my ex-bf brian is still in love with me (we went out for 9 months) he doesnt act it..or be an ass to me or anything, its just i know he still loves and cares about me. it kinda gets annoying that he still does..how can i ask him to just move on?

by saying just that... be like, look you are a nice guy, i dont hate you, but im with soemone new, and i think its time you do the same adn be a nice guy to some other girl who wants to be with you.

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OK this relates to the other questions ive asked. I'm really shy around girls and its hard for me to not studder when i talk to a girl. I get all sweaty and clammy when i have to talk to a girl i like. My mind goes blank and i cant think what to say. Got any pointers on how to fix this?

It all has to do with self confidence. You have to be confident. Unconfident guys are a turn off. What are you so scared of or nervous about anyway? they are just girls. human beings, just like yourself. just relax, be yourself, dont try so hard, and remember talking to girls is a perfectly normal thing. if you keep being nervous you are gonna say something dumb, but if you just relax you will be fine.

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(yes i just asked the q about the x bf..) anyways.. ohh my boyfriend ryan..i love him so much. i know hes ready for sex, and i am too. we tried it once..fully no clothes but he wasnt hard enough at the time so he couldnt put it in me. then tonight, i ended up giving him head..(FOR THE FIRST TIME) and i must have given him head for a minuet..then he pushed me away cuz he cumed! im like..wow? am i that good..? idk! anyways..like i REALLY want to have sex with him, just because i know we're both ready..but it always takes us SO long to get to that point. we're the kind of couple that kisses and makes out ALOT..and we ususally do forever before we do anything. like we'll be in his room and make out on his bed for an hour before we do anything. how do i speed things up ah bit?


*I RATE AWESOME!!*

by dping exactly that... speeding things up... while you are kissing, instead of just kissing, start ripping eachothers clothes off.

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Ok, I am 15 and so is my boyfreind and we have been going out for a month and I trust him but I always have the fact that he's known as a player in the back of my mind. I really like him don't get me wrong, and he's as sweet as can be even with his freinds around and everything, which makes me happy and he does make me happy, but lately it just seems like he might be cheating on me. This weekend for instance, I talked to him friday night n he told me 2 call him saturday after I got home from shopping and I called and he didn't call back until tonight when I called him. I told him I called yesterday and he said " Yeah I was busy..doing something... Oh but I forgot what it was, but I was doing something." When he said that I just started thinking something might be up. What do you think?...

give him the benifit of the doubt. guys are so absent minded they almost never remember what they are doing. if you trust him, then keep trusting him. dont accuse him of anything until you really got some proof.

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ok, recently i jus started being a columnist (yea, and i need advice!!)Anyway, i dunno wats wrong wit me. But i started this on.... Aug. 16th i think, and since then only OnE person dropped a question in my inbox. I know i give good advice cuz my average rating wuz a 4.57, but then how cum i'm not gettin any questions?? Is it that i'm not being patient enuff, or wat? Cuz i'm thinking about quiting being a columnist. Help me out please. thanx

look you gotta give it time. i been a columnist since like march or april i think. and i barely get questions dropped in my inbox, and my rating isnt bad either. most people dont just ask a specific columnist, they usally ask the whole site to get a bunch of oppinions. so just keep answering the questions on the main page. and dont give up. this stuff is good for you :)

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I know silly question but I want my last day of summer last.. I thought you guys give me some ideas to do tommorw.. and beisde nobody dont want waste there last day of summmer. i mean i am ready to be a senior.. my point is i dont want to watch tv all day beecouse i want to do something keep me busy. thanks. i know few list clean,layout, what other 18 and up do with out job and cars and beise driving.. any tips.... I know worst advice qestion but oh well i just bored lol.. thanks

find some friends and go get drunk! :) get fuckin wasted til you puke your fuckin guts out and find some dumb girls invite them over, get them drunk and fuckin wasted til they puke their guts out and fuckin smash them ... then you and your friends can talk about your hang overs and how sore your dicks are at school the next day. :)

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My Friend Recently Got Dumped By "The Love OF Her Life" She Thinks That It's Her Fault. And If She Can't Have Him Then Her Lifes Worthless. And She Refuses To Eat. She Hasn't Ate In 4 Days. Does Anyone Know A Way I Can Try To Get Her To Eat Again? It's Killing Me. I Really Really Need Your Help Really Soon.

Sincerely,
A Concerned Person...Aka Steph

This is really sad. Try to explain to your friend, that not eating will not solve anything. it will only hurt her more. And none of this is her fault. If this guy really loved her, he wouldn't have broken her heart. She has to gte up and move on. Its gonna be hard but you will be there for her right by her side to help her be happy again. trust me, she really needs a friend right now. good luck! :)

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One nyte i was with this guy, nathan who i knew a long time and we ended up going down on eachother and doing "69". We are just really good friends. Then three days later me and this guy went over to one of my other good friends' house and i gave the other guy head because i was pressured into it and he kept asking me to do it but i kept refusing. After about 3 hours i finally agreed to so he would get off my case. Well Nathan went off with my friend and pleasured her..after i did this i felt really regretful and felt horrible. Do you think that i'm now a slut?

if you regret it, then you are not a slut. now, if you were all bragging about it like "yeah i sucked his jaun, and his jaun too" then you would be a slut. and dont ever let anyone pressure you into doing something you dont want to. no means no, and if a guy cant respect that and tries to push or force you to do it the fuckin hit him in the nuts or spit in his face. fuck that shit, dont ever let anyone disrespect you or make you disrespect yourself like that. but dont feel bad, just let all this be a less on to you, and make some better choices in the future.

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I'm 16, and my dad still treats me like I'm a "little girl". My mom and I, we get along so well, because she treats me like a young adult, but my father raises hell whenever I ask him to do ANYTHING. We see a family psycologist, and not even that helps. He's just so effing stubborn. I tell him allll the time " dad I'm not a little girl anymore", but it just doesn't get through to him. I know he's going through this "phase", but isn't over 3 years a little much? I am an only child, and a model, and I know he hates to see me take pictures and wear clothes that expose my stomach and it's just a lot to take. He tells me I have no future because I failed one year of math with exelent effort, and that I'll never make it. He puts me down and makes me feel so effing shitty. It's like he wants my respect, but he doesn't give it back. Any advice at all pllease.

thank you

well tell him that... tell him you want his respect. you give it to him, why shouldnt you get it back. you are not a little kid, you are 16. he should be happy that you are not out doing the nasty shit most freakin 14 years old are doing. and tell him to stop putting you down, thats only gonna make the relationship you guys have worst. doesnt he want the kind of relationship with you that your mom has? tell him you want one with him.

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hey well I really like this guy and he likes me too but we know it cant work out. (long story) But I asked him what he didnt like about me..and he said I was flakey..i didnt wanna seem dumb and be like what the heck is that so im like ohh ok and i changed the subject lol....so thats where you advice ppl come in..whats flakey? haha..

he is basically calling you weird. like you act strange, like the oddball. but oh well, its not bad being the oddball, means you are one of a kind, no one is like you, you're unique! :)

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Hey everyone...I need some advice....

Well I met this guy almost 8 months ago. We started talkin and we went out for about a week but things were not workin out because he lived like 30 mins away and neither one of us could drive. So we broke up and didnt talk for a while then we started talkin again and we got really close. He told me he didnt want to go out right then cause we wouldnt ever see each other. He wanted to wait until he could drive. Well he will be able to drive on tuesday. We have had a really hard time the past month or so. He told me he loved me and the whole nine yards. But now he is sayin that he doesnt really want a relationship. And some ppl told me that he said he hated me and never liked me and i asked him and he said he didnt say that. I cant stop thinkin bout him and i really love him a lot. How do I get him to realize that. I have already talked to him and tried to explain. All i want is just to be with him....Please help

Sorry it was so long

this guy probably suddenly doesnt want a relationship because hes got a new car and probably thinks hes hot shit and want to go picking up girls with his buddies. but i could eb wrong. you should talk to him ask him if he loves you and now he finally has the opportunity to see you then why doesnt he want to be with you?

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I use to hate this girl at my school, i never said anything to her hurtful its just that she acts stuck-up but the problem is that my friend is friends with her and i cant stand being around her, I dont wanna tell my friend because i am scared she will stand up for the girl and stop talking to me.

so just tell your friend... im not trying to be mean, cuz i love being your friend, but i dont like your new friend, so im only wanna chill with you when you are not around here. you know, that girl was not put on this world for you to like her, so you dont have to and your friend should be able to accept that.

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is there an age of how old ur supposed to be when u get ur belly button peirced? ill rate ya. lol thanx ~JessiKa~

well how old are ya? if your like 12 thats a little too young. but nah, i dont really think there is an age you should be able to pierce it, as long as your parents say its okay then go for it. if you are under 18, yuo might need a parent to go with you to get it done though.

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