about

I am a 29/f that loves to listen and try to help out. I have always been the one people go to for advice.

I will tell you how I feel about it. If you don't like my answer, I'm sorry. However, usually what I say is true, people just can't handle the truth.

advice

Okay well I'm 13/f and I want to get the kind of contact lenses that can change my eye colour and all that stuff.
1.How much would they be ?
2.Am I old enough to use them ?
3.Are there any long/short term effects to wearing them ?

Contacts at any age, are a pain in the butt. However, if learned how to properly take care of them, they become like putting on shoes. If you can take care of your things, it's a good sign that wearing contact lenses would be appropriate for your age. With that said, they tend to get expensive. I am not sure where you are, but I am in Oklahoma. Here was what I was priced not to long ago for my contacts. For disposable contacts, they come 6 pair in a box, you have to purchase 2 boxes, one for each eye, lasts 3 months, would cost me 80.00, which would total around 320.00 a year. Now, they have a yearly contact, but problem is, they can tear, or get lost and it cost 150.00. So in the long run, the yearly contact lens is cheaper, but you would have to pay 75.00, just to replace one if something were to happen. I would just go and talk to your optometrist about the right option for you. Good Luck!!

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I've been really tired & sore lately. I feel like my body has the flu, but I only have a slight temperature. I had mono over the summer. It still shows up on my blood test, but my doctor said that's normal. I am a bit underweight. I'm approximately 5'7-5'9 range & weigh 116-118 lbs. All of my joints, bones, & muscles ache. This has been a consistent thing, but I usually can go through the school day fine. I was thinking of taking a day off, because it's really becoming tiring. Usually, if I don't nap at least twice a day & get 8 hours of sleep, it becomes much worse. It hurts to even type. My arms & legs ache & it's been pretty bad for the last few days. My parents think if it doesn't improve that I should go to the ER. Would this be a good idea or should I wait it out? The fatigue has been happening for a few months, but it was never this bad. I'm afraid to go, because people give me a difficult time about my weight. I do eat, except I have a fast metabolism & I get full very easily. Does anyone have any opinions or suggestions?? Anyone ever have this problem?? Any ideas?? Thanks!!

I'm not trying to accuse you of anything, but is there an underlying reason, noone knows about, for not wanting to go to the E.R.? I would think about going for many reasons. First, being tired at such a young age could be a sign of something more seriously wrong than you think. Secondly, if your problem just keeps getting worse, then you may risk your health and even your life if you don't seek treatment, and could have been cured way before this. I am not neccessarily sure if you would have to go to the emergency room. I would suggest going to your primary doctor for an exam and blood test first. Just remember, there is only one you, take care of yourself. You may find it is something as small as sleep apnea that keeps you from getting deep sleep at night. You'll never know though, unless you go to the doctor to find out. Good Luck!!

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i posted a bulletin about my friends a while ago about how theyre never there for me. well yesterday that got put to the test because my boyfriend of 5 months broke up with me. he was my first kiss. first boyfriend (that was over a week long). etc. i cried all yesterday. i cried todayy. my friends had the nerve to talk about me behind my back to each other about how i have to get over it and its just a boy and how its annoying that i talk about him. its been one day. im questioning if theyre really my friends. i dont want to switch friend groups. if you were me, you would know how stuck i am in this group. please dont question that. well my question is how do i deal with a broken heart without the support of my "best friends"? i mean, i dont even know how to deal with it with best friends! this makes everything worse. please help meeee



thanks;;
hopelessss

Sweetheart, I've been where you are. Even as an adult, my friends always seem to have better friends to hang around for some reason or another. Now, I have learned that it is strictly up to me to be here for myself. You know what I have found out? I am the best listener I know, sounds crazy talking to myself, right? However, at least this is the only way for me to help myself through it all. I've come to realize that for the most part, if my friends can't be here for me, the same holds true on the flip side. I don't make time for them now. I give them a dose of their own medicine. My best friend for 13 years now, decided to shut me out of her life for no reason. I went through a terrible mess with my husband and she really wasn't there for me. Then, a few months later, she had the same problem. She'd call and I'd listen, but I wasn't there for her like I used to be. I know, I haven't told you how to deal with your situation in a sense that may have been in the direction you were seeking, but I have given you a piece of advice that you will take with you for the rest of your life, and that is, you are your own best friend, you and you alone know how to take care of yourself. Good Luck!! If you need someone to talk to, I'm here.
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You are most welcome!! Thank you for your kind words. If you ever need anything or advice again, I'm here for you!!

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17/f

im going to try and word this in the least rude way i possibly can.. forgive me if any of it is bad..

around the 23rd of december my period was due.. its usually dead on then or up to 3 days later, it didnt come, and on the 29th of december, i gave my boyfriend oral, there was precum there, but im sure it came off with the oral.. anyway we stopped for him to finish off kinda on me.. and he went to touch me "down there" after touching himselfbriefly.. i stopped him though incase he had anything on his hands, he managed to touch me a tiny bit though.. he didnt put his fingers actually in me though, just on me..

my period is still late now..

i know its probably not likely for my to be pregnant even though u can get pregnant by precum, even i know that

my question is... what do you think.. what are my possibilities of me being pregnant??

I seriously think your chances of getting pregnant in this manner are pretty much slim. If it was that small of an amount of precum, it would be dry and therefore inactive. Your period situation, could be because of stress. If you are still concerned after this weekend, get a test, just do it and get it over with. I wouldn't have been as patient as you. I would have already taken fifteen test by now. LOL Good Luck!!

If getting one is the problem, you can go to your local Health Department and get one for free, and they can't tell your parents. It's illegal for them to do so. Good Luck!!

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19/f from Italy
i know its realy long but pls read it!!plssss
Hi my problem is the following...for about 1 year i am very close 2 this guy...we r best friends he sais so him self...he always said that he would never try 2 flirt with me cz he would feel 2 guilty cz he just saw me as a real nice innnocent girl..well in the summer we made vacations in my home town where he saw another side of me...he saw me dancing and guys flirting with me and all that stuff...after that he changed towards me..he was carying we talk almost twice a day...he bought me a present its like he liked me more than before and he sais he likes me but he was always the flirty guy so i dont know in what way he means it...once he told me very serious that he like me and i got scared so i said in a very friendly(kind of laughing) way "i like u 2"...when we watch dvd at my place he is very carying he wants 2 hug me the whole time and sometimes he sleeps over cz its late ,and the whole night he just holds me in his arms...and then there r other times where he asks me about one of my best friends(which is very pretty)and he sais that he likes her(he saw her 3 months ago for 30 minutes)and i got sick of it so i called him a coward and a chicken if he doesnt sent her an email and tells her that he likes her so he did!i dont know if he really likes her or if he is just playing with me!he even asked me if this subject bothers me and i said no...once at a party where he was kind of drunk i asked him if he liked me and he said yes...and then he added "as a friend"and he huged me...but the rest of the night he kept dancing with me very close...he even put his hand on my butt so i sometimes think maybe he really loves me as a friend but he wouldnt mind if i am just his sex buddy ..doesnt like me more than that...i dont know...but on the other hand when we r just lieng in bed wathcing the movie he is really carying and soft...i dont know pls i need advice...i really like him but i dont wanne b used just 4 the physical part!oh and btw i am 19 and he is 22...but we study together...also...if guy sais u r his best friend does it mean that he doesnt want anything more from you?

thnx a lot,
Gery

From what you have explained, it sounds like he has developed feelings for you. He also sounds like a great guy. I don't think he would want to use you for sex. If you want to see if you can start a relationship together, then ask him if he would be interested. I hope that it works out for you two, because it seems you are both interested, just too scared to be the one to make the first move. Good Luck!!

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I have no confidence whatsoever in myself...none!
Is there any way i can fix this?
what are some positive things i can think?

Confidence is a mindset. All you have to remember is everyone is worth being on this earth for one reason or another. Remember God (if you believe in him) put you here for a reason. When you start feeling down, just remember all the compliments you have ever received and remember they were true or else they wouldn't have said it. I have a confidence problem too. However, I just think to myself, what makes everyone else think they are so much better than me? Then I remember, they are not. We are all just human, and at least I am here to enjoy my life. Good Luck!!

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F/13

ok so i am trying to get into shape before swimsuit season.

1.)what are some excersises that i can focuse on my thighs, bottom && stomach
i have a home gym and i do crunches
but its there anything else
please dont say go to the gym... because for some reason i feel so uncomfortable for people to watch

2.) what are some things i can try for diets
how do you stay away from sweets
i drink diet pops
i LOVE fruits
and i do not eat pork
please what are some things i can change about eating
me working out
please help


thank you in advice
and yes i do rate

I would suggest getting an exercise ball. It is really effective and totally fun.

As for the diet, I would just make sure that you don't eat starchy foods, or high sugar foods. Stick to protein like chicken, fish and fresh fruits and veggies. Also, make sure to drink plenty of water. It helps in so many ways, weight loss, skin complexion, and overall healthy feeling.

Good Luck!!

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14/f

ok well my friend asked me out once and i said no to him because i only saw him as a friend. then he called me like a few days ago and i asked him how his christmas was. he said that his grandpa died on christmas eve and his bestfriends mom died as well cauing his bestfriend to move out of the country. he then asked me why i said no and i told him he then asked me out again and i had to say yes. i don't know if that was right but i did it i mean i wanted him to be happy. he's a sweet guy but not at all close to my type or what i've been with. i'm use to going out with drug dealers and thugs. but with him he's just the exact opposite. he's not relaxed really up tight and actually someone my parents would really like. honestly i don't think he knows what he's getting himself into like i'm scared that in the end i might end up hurting him. i'm not attracted to him and that's dangerous when it comes to me. i've cheated on boyfriends for that reason and i know that it's wron but that's what has happened. i don't want to do that to him and i could resist to but my personality would truely risk it. i'm not sure what to do.

so please help. what would you have said in my position and what would you do?

Thank you and sorry it's so long! =]

It's true, you can't help who you like. However, with your previous comment about the type of person you do like, he may be just what you need. This may be one of your wake up calls telling you to choose a better way of life. I am not trying to lecture, but you need to make sure you take care of yourself and stay true to yourself. You don't want to end up being the one with regrets.
Cheating is wrong. If you truly don't like this boy, then yes break it off with him. It was unfair of him to put you in that position where you accepted to go out with him out of pity. I would suggest telling him that it just doesn't feel right being in a relationship with him, explain to him how you feel, telling him that you said no once, and that it was a low blow to try and get you to start dating him under those particular circumstances. Honesty, is still the best policy. Good Luck!!

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Just checking...the birth control pill still works when you have consumed alcohol right?

As far as I know, alcohol does not interfer with birth control. Here is a website containing information about the birth control pill. Good Luck!
http://www.coolnurse.com/pill.htm

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My 16th birthday is coming up, so I'm trying to plan a party or something, but I'm having trouble figuring out how to do it. I have a lot of friends who are in different groups: like, there's a group of kids I hang out with from band, a group from lacrosse, and then some others I've just known awhile that are close to me. I don't want to have just one massive super party where I invite all of them because I feel like if I do that then some of them will be neglected at some point, and they are all pretty close friends with me. I have thought about doing a party and inviting only the biggest group, and then another day do something with the others like go out to dinner or something. But there's so many groups idk what to do... what would you do?

Maybe it would be okay to invite the closests ones to a party from all the groups. It may give people a chance to get to know another group and make new friends. If you really don't want to do that, let your friends do the planning for you, this way, you won't hurt anyones feelings and they can be responsible with handling the activity for you. Hey, why not, it's your birthday, you deserve to be spoiled by your friends on this one day ;)! Good Luck!

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Im 16, just had my period getting over it today. but two nights ago, i was really tired and i went to change my tampon not realizing that i already had one in. Later i completly remembered.. took the second one out and the 1st one i got, but when i took it out it had no string.. is that something i should worry about or not a big deal? please helppp!

I've done this before. One night I got smashed and was on my period. Came home, took care of business and went to bed. The next morning, I went to the bathroom and took care of business again, to find I had two in me. I freaked out totally. Nothing went wrong and I am fine. About the string thing, it could be possible that the string was wrapped up in one of the tampons and just didn't notice it, or could have been a defective tampon to begin with. I wouldn't worry to much about it. However, if you start to feel really weird, like being sickwise, I would go to the doctor for a check up. Good Luck!!

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i was on myspace one day when my spyware thingy popped up and notified me that it had expired, and all this techincal stuff i didnt understand. then something else popped up with the options "allow instalation" or "block instalation". i had no idea what this was so i kept clicking X. now, my computer is really messed up. the icons and start menu only show up when i 1st turn on the computer, then they disapear. just a minute ago, i was randomly taken to this website where it said my PC was infected or something, and it wanted me to run some kind of performace optimizer. (performanceoptimizer.com) i didnt do it becuase i wasnt sure. what should i do....? HELP!

Never click on any pop-ups on your computer. Most are tracking devices that give you spyware and viruses. I would suggest going to this website, it will run a virus scanner on your computer and give you options to go from there. It is a free service. Also, a very good free antivirus program can be found on the second link to ensure safety of your computer. Good Luck!!

http://us.mcafee.com/root/mfs/default.asp
http://www.free-av.com/

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14/f

obviously my eyesight has gotten worse. i haven't changed my glasses since i was in seventh grade, because i had an eye exam and ear exam during school.. and they said my glasses still worked. but i knew my eyesight got worse during 8th grade... but we didn't have the exam that time. i told my dad that i needed new glasses and he's the type of person who doesn't like to spend money and such. he says "why? your glasses are good enough.. it's alot of money to get you a new one.. did the nurse say you needed a new one?" and etc. right now, i can't even see what the overhead says, and i ask the person next to me. contacts would be nice too.. and it's also hard for me to focus on something with my eyes.. i'm not sure... help?!

Here are a few things you can look into. Does your dad have insurance on you? If yes, look to see if vision care is included. If not, go to your local community action agency and see if they can lead you into the right direction of getting help on vision care. I would like to say, involve your dad. If he is concerned with the price, offer ways to help him find a solution in getting you help. Tell him this is not a joke, or you wanting to get new glasses, you truly are having problems seeing. Maybe by working together, you two can come up with a solution that suits both your needs. Good Luck!!

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Ok so, i have a boyfriend and i still talk to my ex-boyfriend. I was in a great reltionship with my ex, but then i couldn't see him for 4 months becasue of the Navy, and now he is gone for another. But my ex and i still love each other, but i aslo love my new boyfriend. But point being is, that i want to write a Pro and Con list. Like what i like about him and what i don't. But
WHAT QUESTIONS SHOULD I PUT ON THE LIST?
becasue i can't think of anything..
thank you..the questions is in cap's, just incase you missed it.lol
A long long long list with many idea/ questions would be very helpful..tahnks

Ok, you totally reminded me of the episode on Friends where Ross made a list for Rachel and (damn forget her name)*(the one he married and said Rachels name instead). Oh well, just remember to trash the list after you are done!! lol

Ok, first you need to decide which one you feel safest with, which one you feel the lonliest with, which one makes you laugh, which one makes you cry, (if he is making you cry, why is he making you cry), and which one you have the overall feeling of content with.

Good Luck!

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Is it wrong to really like your counselor?
she's in college, and i'm in highschool-junior

it wouldn't be wrong to continue seeing her for guidance after i graduate?

any advice?

When you say you like your counselor, do you mean in the sense that she's hot and you would like to be with her? If so, just remember if you do like her, don't pursue anything while your in school, do it after you graduate. This way, you won't ruin her life because she acted on impulse. Now, seeing her after graduation is fine, for advice, if that's truly what you want. If not, then after you graduate, if you still feel this way, then just tell her straight up that you like her and go from there. Good Luck!

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Please, only answer these questions if you really know about them. And just answer the question, don't try to persuade me into a different direction.

1. What are the best over-the-counter appetite suppressants?
2. What is better: Walking a mile, or doing 200 sit ups?
3. Can cigarettes really suppress your appetite?

1. dexatrim is a good over the counter pill. (Would I suggest it, no, because all diet pills have a tendency to make your heart rate go up, causing undue stress, one of my good friends died at the age of 26 because of phen-phen.)
2. A combination of both. A good work out routine is better. I like the exercise ball. Not only is it very productive, it is fun. I laugh all the time trying to balance on the ball.
3. I smoke, am still overweight. I have a double negative going for me. It doesn't suppress your appetite as much as people would like to claim. You just end up getting addicted to smoking and then still want to eat.
4. I know you asked for no persuasion methods, I am not trying to persuade you in any way, just use common sense first, sometimes, things aren't exactly as they seem to be. I would definitely keep a record of your heart beat if you are going to take any diet pills. If it gets to high, then stop taking them. If you are really wanting to take a diet pill, I would go to the doctor and get a check up and follow her advice above anyone elses. Who knows, an hour at the doctors office, could become the best decision you've ever made. Good Luck!

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I have a pimple under the skin on my bottom lip. I mean, it's not a bump.. I pulled my lip up to see a circle and a dot on it. You can't even see it.. it's just my lip color. My mom said it was a pimple under the skin so I'm going to go with what she said. I noticed something was off with my lips because that side was dry. But my lips are not chapped or cracked. Is there anything I can do to make it go away?

Carmex.

What, have a problem against Carmex? You asked what you could do to make it go away, Carmex works wonders on stuff like that. Have you even tried it? If you haven't then why would you give a rating of 1? I think you just wanted someone to go on this long drawn out process of what it is and how you can get rid of it. I summed it up for you. Carmex works wonders. But, oh well, if you think you can do better, than stop asking for advice and just do what you want to do.

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I'm incredibly inexperienced.
The farthest I've gone is dry humping
but it's not even to the point of sex with clothes on.
It's just grinding.
I'd like things to move along
but I don't know how to do anything.
Will someone please explain
how to touch a guy with pants on?

Then what do I do
once his pants are off?

Thanks

This may sound lame, but boy do I miss dry humping. I'm married with two children now, because I progressed from dry humping, and it just isn't the same. I know that younger people want to be treated like an adult and enjoy the adult privileges as well. I remember it for me, I couldn't wait to grow up. Now, I can't wait for time to reverse itself. Ok, sorry now on to your problem not mine ;)!

If I were you, I would let everything work out naturally. Don't force anything to happen, when you are truly ready, you will know what to do. It's in our survival instincts.

However, if this is not the right avenue you are wanting to go down, here is the other advice. When you are with him, just softly touch his body all over, slowly making your way down there. You could even slip your hand down his pants. Let your imagination go from there. I will say, at any time, if his penis is near your vaginal area, he needs to wear a condom. Sperm can be transmitted through pre-cum and also it doesn't have to be in you either. With practice and safe practice, you can enjoy your life and still not have to take care of any children. Good Luck!

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Hello, My name is david, my age is 25, i am masterbuting from last 3 years, my question is that can i be a father because my sperm is like water, i am deeply worried about this, please help me, i am asking it from my deep heart

Unfortunately, there is no real way to tell by the consistency of your semen. If you are truly concerned, I would go and have a sperm count done at your local doctor. This would clear up any concerns you may have. Also, by doing this, you will know in the future when it comes to settling down and you want to have kids. You will already know if you can or cannot do it. I wouldn't worry though. Just remember, we are not all made from the same mold. We are all unique in our lives and that is what makes us who we are. Watery like semen isn't something I would worry about though. Good Luck.

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Lately i haven't really done anything. This whole vacation i've gone to my friend's house twice and my grandparents house about 5 times. I've been stuck on my xbox, and feel very bored.

i love football, but my dad doesn't like to play catch....and i don't have friends that love football the way i do.

i don't want to live like this playing madden and ncaa football on xbox-i wanna be that---and to be honest i don't think i will with things going the way they are.

Thanks!!

Your just in a rut right now. It also sounds as if you may be going through a slight form of depression. It happens when you get couped up in the house in the winter time. It's called cabin fever. Just think of it like this, you will be going back to school in 5 days, and you'll have to get off your hiney ;).
Now, if you are wanting to participate in the actual sport instead of just watching from the sidelines and playing it on video games, start looking at your options. I know football season is over for this school season, but think about strength training and running laps to get into shape. Get a guide about football runs and kind of like practice. Then, when it comes for try-outs next season you'll be prepared. Another thing you could do, is take a piece of plywood, cut a hole, put some sort of netting behind it and practice throwing the ball into the catcher. Just an idea. Good Luck!!

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