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Advicenator advisors
My question is, why does it seem like an overwhelming amount of the advisors on this web site are teenage girls? I'm serious about this. Is it because they have more time on their hands, have a stronger feeling of needing to give advice, need more advice.etc.etc? What do you think the reason is?
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i have noticed that too, is there a si for just adults as with life comes experice, does a 13 year old have this ?
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I an a 13 year old girl and I come here to help people. Yes in my spare time but that's because I like many others love to help people. Besides at school people come to me with their problems (even ones I don't know!) So I figure I have the practice so why not help others? Oh and I think that (no offence) girls can be more sympathetic and help people with their problems more than guys.(not trying to be sexist) We tend to be easier to talk to as well. Example: Tell a guy you have a problem and most will laugh and brush it off. Tell a girl and they will usually talk it over with you and give you some pointers on what to do. Please send feedback.
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I'm a teenage girl but that doesn't make me the typical 'oooooomg i am soooooooo like sad my boyf doesnt talk to me at skule!!! like omg wut do i do? i luv ma boi soo much!' type, and I speak for a lot of the teenage girls on this site when I say that.
I think teenage girls DO need more advice than anyone else - OR are more willing to seek it from a wider audience. Teenage girls are very insecure, as a whole, and tend to let it show more than teenage guys, for example. But is that so wrong?
I have to admit though that all those 'how do I get so-and-so's attention?' and 'how do I get skinnier?' questions bug me. A LOT. But I guess that's what the mods and the rating systems are there for.
Girls also like gossip and nosing into people's lives, however much they don't want to admit it (I am speaking about the sterotypical girl here, so don't get offended anyone), so it's a great passtime for us to give advice. Girls also TEND to be more empathetic than guys, making them more willing to and often better at giving advice than men (on certain topics that is - not to be sexist, but on relationships as opposed to motorbikes).
Sorry for such a vague non-answer. Just thought I'd comment!
Blessed Be,
Rach xxx
*Quick edit: I may be speaking only for myself when I say this, but I certainly DON'T have too much time on my hands. I am in the middle of my GCSEs, organising work experience myself because my school is totally unco-operative (is that even a word?), caring part time for my disabled mother, dealing with a psycho step mother and my friends who are all smoking/drinking/doing drugs...yeah. The list goes on. And I bet a lot of teenage girls out there can identify with a lot of that (with the possible exception of the psycho step mother). I don't have too much time on my hands - I come on here to avoid real life.
Hmm. So much for 'quick'.
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Girls are more sensative to talk to about problems, there is only one or two guys who are like that thats why there isnt many lads, Most guys would laugh at the problems rather than help.
luv roxie
XxX♥XxX
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i feel that more girls are advisors because we feel the need to help others in either situations close to what we've experienced or give advice on things that we feel we can give guidance on. So a big chuck of us are teenagers it is only because we know that people our age have more dilemas or problems then any other age group and we relate to it by helping others through tough times in their lives.
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because we have more issues and know what people are going through or need help from others we don't (i don't) have extra time, but feel like i have to try to help other people out that are going through the same stuff as i am. (which is a lot)
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Hello there,
I have been trying my best to figure that one out...
Have you noticed that girls will tell their dads things that they simply can NOT bring themselves to talk to their mother about? Same thing goes for boys. There is a definate lack of Dad type creatures around these days. Failing to have that person to bounce things off of, they ask their peers.
Why? Because, quite frankly, when you are 13, practically everyone you know well enough to ask adviceis also 13. Boys and girls all the same.
The difference comes in that a boy can ask his mother: "Hey Mom, what can I do to impress this girl." Mom is a girl, so she knows the answer usually. Don't EVER ask your mother what a boy likes... :-)
A boy at 13 has a number of people around of the male type, varying in ages, which he can ask most everything he would ask a dad if he were there. Pastor/teacher/martial arts instructor/mechanic/barber, etc.
We wouldn't think twice about asking someone we hardly know if we should get roses or chocolate, do we look alright, etc.
People say men don't ask for advice... That's bull. You see, we do. We will ask, get the answer and move on. I remember hearing girls talk about what their friend said they should do, and their friend's friend said this and that and the other.
Men, are very simple in such respects. We don't intentionally ask people we know will give bad advice. If we have a matter of life experience, we like to go to people who have already lived through a few more things than we have. For example: Back when I was 12, I wouldn't go seeking investment or job advice from someone 13. Try 50+ They have already done all the career stuff and if they did it right you get good advice. If however they did it wrong, you get to find out what job you do NOT want to get into. By asking our elders these things we learn something either way.
Today we all have reduced opportunities. When you are little today, you can't just hang out with adults... The news people have everyone convinced that every adult is a predator unless they are your parent. Guess what? The last figures I saw indicated that better than 80% of all child sexual abuse is committed by one or both parents.
What effect has this had? When I was about 6 my Dad went to pick up something from an equipment yard. I went with him and noticed a guy rebuilding an engine. Dad went into the office to pay, so I wandered over and started bugging this guy. By the time Dad came out, I was learning how to use a torque wrench. (The thing you use to make sure all the bolts on something are tight enough, but not too tight.)
Dad asked the guy if I was bothering him. He said not at all, so Dad left me there to learn for about 3 hours. I got a lot of that. Dad was a fair judge of character.
Now, there usually isn't a dad at all. :-( Everyone is so scared of things that kids never get a chance to talk to many people wiser than themselves.
We have ended up in a place where the only place to get advice is from our peers. People your own age usually give bad advice about almost everything. Boys, girls it doesn't matter.
Right now, on this board, there is a 13 year old female asking what she needs to do to start having sex. There are a few people who asked her to think twice, but those in her age range were less concerned with her mental health, and more concerned she get an appropriate condom.
A 14 year old, said something like "Don't wait till you get old like me, get your groove on before you get too old"
BAD ADVICE! Down! Bad Advice, no biscuit!
Adults in general aren't out to get you. It's a fact. If your Mom gives you bad advice, it isn't because she is trying to ruin your life... It is because she THINKS WHAT SHE IS TELLING YOU IS RIGHT. It doesn't make it right. Not at all. Same thing for Dads. (Though I mostly see complaints about mothers here.)
When my parents knew I was old enough to think for myself is NOT when I said I was. It was after I proved it. I thought something my parents said was unreasonable. My dad told me to put it in writing. I did my own thinking on why I felt that way. Then I started researching the idea. What I found out was that my parents were right about that. I wrote it out and handed it over. It was after that that my parents KNEW that if I looked into things for myself I would come to the right conclusion. Even if I didn't like it.
Short version: You want to be treated like a thinking, well read, intelligent and wise adult? Act like one.
Adult life is a lot easier when we spend our youth listening and learning everything we can to make smart choices.
Here's another thought: Travel. Out of this country. See how the rest of the world lives. Most people buy clothes because they are durable, not because they are "IN" (for about a week.) Guaranteed to open your mind to a whole new way of thinking.
Over a quarter million people died in the recent Tsunami... The survivors have NO PLACE at all to call home. And the current threads here are: "Should I wear a thong?" "Where do I get Like size 00 clothes, that are, like, in?" I like this boy...girl, etc."
The best thing that ever happened to me was seeing that almost everything I had been told to believe was important: Cars, clothes, trends, music, hair, team choice, etc. was completely and totally meaningless when you look at the big picture. I would have been right here asking the same kinda stuff(boy version of course) had I not had that opportunity.
Ok, this became a rant. Not against 13 year old girls. A rant against what our society tells 13 year old girls and boys is important for them to be worrying about.
Back to the topic of WHY:
Girls, let me ask you a question: How many of your girlfriends did you tell about this site?
Now tell me how many boys you told about it? Did you tell them there was a guy with 20+ years of computer experience they could ask questions for free? (I normally charge $75.00 per hour in my shop.) Did you tell them there was a place to ask questions about cars and trucks? How about model rockets? R/C cars? Paintball? Airsoft guns? Model building? Sports? Weight training? Hunting? CB radios? Computer hardware/software/networking? Car stereo? Hydraulics? Truck driving scools?
Have you told a single boy you know about any of the things that HE might be interested in?
Do I see one hand raised? Ok, so you get a boy in here and he asks a question. Wonderful! What do most of the girls do? Make fun of him, laugh at him, tell him he is stupid or he would already know and CORRECT HIS SPELLING! I am almost to the point where I have looked at every question on this site. I saw a lot of that on my way through.
What do I do when someone asks a question I don't know the answer to... I research it and post links to appropriate resources. When was the last time you did that for a question you couldn't answer? Saying something "cute" or mean as hell does not encourage the participation of teen boys. Teen boys are actually quite insecure about opening themselves up to be called stupid, or made fun of. They don't handle it well at all. It just guts them and they are never quite the same.
Here is something to consider: You have this guy, who you really like. You set up a date. You go out and buy the BEST outfit on earth. Your Mom likes this guy, so she gives you her credit card, sends you to get hair and makeup done in the BEST place in the city.
So far so good? Ok, now he shows up to take you out, and when you open the door, he bursts out laughing! Pointing and LAUGHING AT YOU!
Your new duds may be stylish, and the hair may be the latest french design but to him it is hilarious. He doesn't know anything about french fashion, or Neiman Marcus so to him you look like a hooker in a clown suit.
How BAD would you feel? Would anything ever make you COMPLETELY whole again after something like that?
Same thing if this site offers to answer questions and then the people here ridicule and belittle the askers. Boys minds work different than girls. It isn't a bad thing, it is just they way we are wired.
I got an email from someone after I answered their question. They said they quit using the site because the response they got to a very well thought out question was: "F***ing Dumb*SS!"
I reported another place this person used the same abusive response, using the abuse report feature, and this was the response:
"Moderator Response
Submitted: by FrEe2bMe
Reponse: While K**************'s response was not appropriate, if you look at their over all rating it is only a 2.21. That is why there is now a threshold where you can set who you want to recive answers from Under Profile Setting adjust it so you only recieve answers from people like 4 or higher or whatever your comfortable with. :)"
This guy, yes GUY, 15 years old didn't know that, so he will never be back.
Did anyone step up to tell this person off? Did anyone else report it? Do you even know where the abuse link is?
It is up to the majority here to decide if this is going to be Advivenators.com or Abusenators.com
Since the majority here are 13 year old girls, I ask you: Which will it be?
DangerNerd
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It is probably because most teenage girls have problems. Think about it, periods, boyfriends, friends, clothes, make up, hair, family, all the average stuff. Adults have problems too but younger people, especially girls, love to tell people their problems. If something goes wrong, they love nothing more than to share it with everyone. They often spend more time on the computer and have a lot of time too but the main thing is that they think they know everything and love to post their problems. I should know...guess what, I'm a teenage girl.
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Well, not being a teenager I suppose I should just leave this question alone.But,I'll give you my opinion anyway.
Girls are always giving each other advise.
Girfriends don't always take each others advise but that doesn't stop anybody! So,this is where they can come and give advise and feel good about helping someone else with all the wisdom they can come up with.
There are some guys giving advise too.Might be nice to see a few more.
I think it is good for them too. Not only are they giving advice but they are hopefully learning and thinking about problems that they will encounter themselves at some point in their lives.
And last but not least....It's doing something that they can be proud of.And MOST of the people asking the questions are the same age as them.
Me, i'm older and just hope to throw something in now and then that they all can learn from.Maybe something they should ask mom but just can't.I try to keep honest even if I sometimes wonder if I should really be telling a kid this!!!
I think regarless of our ages we are having fun and hopefully helping someone with their problems.Hope the old lady here helped you with the answers you were seeking!
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I'm with Missa, but I'd shorten it to "Men don't ask for directions." Also, females tend to be more social and so forth... and let's face it, giving advice on personal problems isn't really very manly.
I (18/m, antisocial) am here because I identify with some of the questions and would like to think that I can help.
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i think its because girls have more emotions and want to help people more. also i think guys dont come staright out with thier emotions...so why would they tell the whole advicenators website thier problems?
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girls tend to go through alot at a younger age and mature alot faster becaus ei know i had to grow up at a young age because of things that i would talk to my older cousins alot. so i think they feel that they dont want to have other people go through what they have alreay
hope it helps
luv britt
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I can't say for sure. I'm not a teenager. But here is my theory...
The reason females out-number males...Generally, men like to solve their own problems. Being able to solve their own problems makes them feel competent. They only ask for advise when they have a particularly difficult problem and need an expert. You never offer a man advice, you wait for him to ask for it. To offer when he hasn't asked is basicly accusing him of being incompetent.
And generally, women are the exact opposite. We value love, communication, and relationships. Mainly because we define ourselves through all these things. We like to help, share, support, and nurture, because it makes us feel good about ourselves.
(If you are wondering where I came up with this, read "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus," by John Gray Ph.D. Chapter Two. Excellent book.)
As to why there are more young people than older people, I'm guessing it is simply because younger people have more time on their hands.
For example: teenagers fifteen and younger only have school, family, and friends to worry about. Then you turn sixteen. Now you can worry about going to school, getting a job, driving, and family and friends. After that eighteen rolls around, and you're suddenly worrying about college, work, bills, family, friends, and relationships too. You'd think that by the time you hit your twenties, that would all go away. But nooo...Now you have a career to worry about instead of a job, more bills, more responsibilities, family, friends, and that person who says they want to marry you. Eventually, children get thrown into the mix and...Well, you see where this is going.
You might be wondering how I find the time to do this. I don't know...Oh crap, I need to go to bed :P
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i have also noticed this and i think it maybe because guys don't ususally bother with looking for sites like these and also they think they have to be tough so don't go to anyone when they have a problem. also girls usually stress out more easily, or need help in different things-so they come here. older people usually know how to solve their own problems so in most cases don't come here.
-dorinflower
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Well I am a male (obvoiusly) and I believe it's the massive amount of peer pressure there is on girls today that makes them want to get advice for their problems. Think about it - they're always wanting a way to get this guy they like to like them back, but remember, today the guys are always supposed to ask the girls out. And also girls are constantly needing ways to look good, because a lot of guys can be completely nerd-ish looking and still be a catch, or some that I know that are popular around girls even though they're huge - like 200 pounds or so, and they still are quite popular. So teenage girls are constantly looking at self-image and their emotions to figure out day-to-day problems. I know guys that wouldn't cry if they lost all they had and ended up living under a bridge, but even the most hardened, cold teenage girl will at least cry sometimes; they simply are more emotional, and tehy try to look to other people to help them out, not into themselves. So you have to realize that the female mind and the male mind have a lot of differences. That's not to say that I don't have problems with girls. I do, but I look to immediate friends to get help or advice, or maybe just look into my Bible to get it. Girls on the other hand would want to ask a bunch of simalarly aged girls or guys about their problems because they want help from all there peers so what she does is "right." (not saying it's always right, but a lot of people follow the crowd. Something I don't do at all. Like spelling correctly.) That's pretty much the only reason why there are a lot more girls on Advicenators than there are guys.
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Well, the site is for teens and adults, and lots of teenage girls are very good at giving advice, but they probably do have more time on their hands than teenage guys, because they ride bikes and stuff like that, but I think the main reason would be because lots of teenage girls are nice about giving sex advice to other teen girls, and if adults were answering, they'd just get, "you're too young" because lots of them hate the truth. But, basically teenage girls are just wanting to help I guess. I truly think that I help the site because, I say it like it is mainly.
-TheTeenGirl
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Because us 13-17 year olds have nothing better to do online, or we love to give advice/help out people our age. My reason is because I'm bored and I found myself addicted to this website! There are a few adults you can talk to though, if you want more mature advice, which is pretty cool.
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