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scars
Hey, i'm a 15 year old girl turning 16 n a few months. I'v never had confidence in myself and to be conpletely honest i kinda hate myself. I think im fat and ugly and i try to lose weight but nothings good enough.I'v never had a boyfriend in my life let alone had a guy tell me im pretty. My friends are pretty and they always have guys asking them out but i juss feel stupid hangin with them sometimes, like i dont belong. For the past few years i have resorted to cuttig myself. I'v only done it 3 times but i dont wanna go to counscling or anything cuz my parents and every1 will think im crazy i dunno what to do can you help me?
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
No one will think your crazy if you go to counseling... Well, they shouldn't. If you feel comfortable, then tell a close friend. If you don't then, well, you don't have too. Instead of cutting then maybe you should write everything down or snap with rubberbands [Yeah, I know it sounds stupid.. All my friends tell me to do that instead of cutting].. That's all I can really say.. Hope I helped. Sorry If I didn't. =]
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Its good that you dont want to cut! Next, try to do stuff that makes you feel good! If you want, go on safe exercise and eating diets! The right guy for you will come along sometime, and when he does youll b rite there waiting! Dont worry about how many boyfriends your friends may ahve had, because they aren't you!!! you have to date guys at your own pace! dont worry!
briana <3
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well. if you go to a counclier, NOBODY will think that you r stupid, trust me. i went to a counclier, and i told my friends and they understood. im not saying ur friends will, but no one said you have to tell them about it. and ur parents will be happy that you want to get help, going to a counclier doesn't make you a crazy look a like person. its just somewhere you can go to, to talk and work out your problems =D. they do help ALOT trust me. my counclier helped me to stop my cutting path and lead to a happier life with my family (i had fam. probs.)! and if you do end up going to a counclier, ill be sooo proud of u, but tell me how it goes! GOOD LUCK CHICK!
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look 3 times isnt bad i used to cut myself almost everyday for a year and i tried killing myself twice try to do what u used to liek to do and listen to music adn get a journal and write everything down adn a guy isnt going to make u happy so dont stress urself over that do something to keep u occupied ctting is a very bad habit i have done it for a year i did go to councelign it didnt work and i was on medication jsut think it could be worse and wen i get mad or sad is still cut myself and its been a year so watch urself
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the only person that can TRULY help you is yourself. your friends and family can guide you and be there for you but its really up to you as hard as it is. and believe me i know this first hand. you may think these things about yourself but you shouldn't confidence and personality is what makes a girl beautiful. as for cutting if you wanna be pretty cutting leaves scars and its a day to day reminder of what you are going through or have been through and you will never get better if you are constantly reminded of it, its also ugly. but if you've cut three times it will lead to more. you may promise youself its the last time but it's hard to stop. so tell someone maybe to a counsler but to a close friend you trust.
i hope i helped and good luck!!
<33333 megan lynn
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Cutting yourself doesn't help at all, and you may be doing it out of a need to be noticed.
Unfortunately, most guys our age care only about looks. Don't fear, they'll grow out of it (I hope). You'll find someone to be with, as long as you don't want some really hot guy (if you don't want other people to be so physically obsessed, you shouldn't be either).
You just have to wait it out. Things will get better. People shouldn't care so much about exterior, but around our age, they do.
If your friends are making you feel "excluded", maybe you should hang out with different people.
I think your just going through the depression phase all of us go through. Don't worry too much about appearance, because that's all that it is. You'll grow out of this depression and realize what's really important, and guys will grow out of their immaturity and cruelty (a few, anyways).
Hope I helped.
-Farren
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Stop cutting yourself, it's just stupid and nobody wants to date someone that does freaky stuff like that.
If you really want to lose a few kilos then eat less and get some exercise. It really is that simple.
You'll find though, that if you just relax a little and stop stressing over things, then guys will probably start to show more of an interest anyway.
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dont cut..please dont cut..everyone feels fat and ugly. I mean ask any Hollywood actress and I bet they would tell you that they do NOT think they are pretty. And they all have FAT days.
can you do something right now to improve you looks to help you feel better...a new haircut or color..
Some girls date during HS some do not...NOT always about looks...
I found out later that some guys wanted to ask me out but they were afraid I would turn them down...
What do your friends say?? if you can take it..ask them what you could do to be more availabe to boys?
I feel for you...this age is so hard..(but how cool that you will be able to drive soon!!)
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You don't have to hate yourself! Think about it- I'm sure there's one thing that you're good at. It could be ANYTHING; sports, acting, whatever! Its okay because I think I'm fat, ugly, and yeah I try losing weight ((it has worked, maybe you need dieting suggestions)) anyway, You're probably beautiful, but insecure. Haha- I don't think anyone has had an actual boyfriend that they wanted to be with.. all my friends just get boyfriends for the pleasure of saying they have one! Don't cut yourself-- believe me, I tried that. I know exactly what you're going through, and it's not worth it. I know you might think that nobody understands-- believe me, I do.. you want to cut to get away from things and you think it's the only thing you can control, right? Wrong! If you actually put your mind to something, and think "hey, i'm a motivated, pretty, talented person, and nobody can stop me from doing anything!", your self confidence will get the better of you-- and you'll become that happy person. You're not crazy.. you're just going through tough times and it'll eventually get better! =D
-Kimmy:)
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aww. in order for love u gotta show u love yourself. just show confidenc dont be the loner that does nothing ya know?
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You shouldn't feel that way about yourself.i bet you know this an everyone already told you that but it isn't healthy.if you want to be complimented you have to feel good about yourself before any one else likes you.You have some serious self esteem problems but your not alone on that cause i am going through the same thing and i bet soon enough you will feel better bout yourself.cutting wot help at all it might numb the pain but it wont go away if you want it to go away surround yourself with close friends and family you enjoy being with.and your not crazy this is just a stage most females go through life with but soon enough it will be over.good luck and god bless.
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im gonna be completely honest with you. nothing that i could say will make all these feelings magically disapear. every morning when you get up, and every night before you go to bed, tell yourself how beautiful and wonderful you are. ask your friends to remind you of the qualities that they fell in love with when u guys started being friends. tell yourself that cutting will only make you feel worse. keep talking- no one in their right mind would think you were crazy for needing to talk. if you ever need to talk, message me. keep telling yourself that you are absolutely awesome...and eventually you'll start to believe it.
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hi. look you really need to stop cutting yourself. that isnt gonna do anything to help you it is just going to make things a lot worse. trust me i have a good friend who does that to herself and it just keeps getting wose. Also you need to realize if your friends are friends with you they obviously love you and think your fun to be with. Maybe if you just think of all the good things in you you'll be happier and you might get a boyfriend because guys would much rather go out with someone if they were confident then some1 whos always putting themselves down. I hope this will help u. --Jilli--
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Aww, love, I know how you feel. I'm just like that. And it is annoying, it really is. But the people you are friends with love you, otherwise they wouldn't stay with you if they thought what you thought of yourself. I also resorted to cutting, and as I'm so bad at hiding things, my mum found out and such. But anywho, don't let any one call you a bad person, or ugly or anything of the sort, because its obviously not true. If you think that someone won't go out with you because of how you look, they're obviously not worth it, because they didn't take time to get to know the real you. You'll meet someone when the time is right.
I would really appreciate if you maybe messaged me, so I could talk about this with you further. I'd really like to help. (please)
-daka
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Hey sweetie, I had the same problem. But I resorted to something different..I thought I was fat and I guess you can just draw conclusions from there. I've never had a real boyfriend either and I know how much it hurts to have prettier friends. but in reality they aren't, you're gorgeous in your own way. I bet you are pretty just like everyone has said. Even if you think you're not what does outside looks matter for anyways? You are beautiful in the heart, that is all the matters. You ARE beautiful on the outside. The happier and more friendlier you are the more prettier you become. You just have to stop thinking that look at all the good things of you. As for cutting, I have suggestions for ways to stop if that's what your asking for. As i've mentioned b4 on questions in my column, put a rubberband around your wrist snap it whenever you feel the urge to cut. This hurts but isn't bad like cutting is. You can also use duck tape, put it on the hairy part of your arm and rip it off when ur angry. Just rip off all the emotions. Also find old stuffed animals, cut them up whenever your mad. Write or journal about your feelings and write songs (if ur musical) Listen to music that helps you vent. Anything to get your emotions out. Don't be afraid to go to your school counciler no one has to know but you and your counciler :) I hope this helped sry it's so long, good luck babe if u ever need anything my s/n in on my column or drop one in the inbox, ur beautiful remember that! You dont need a boyfriend right now cuz when u find that guy he'll be PERFECT! and you'll be able to tell him that u saved urself for him.. a married woman once told me I was so upset that I had kissed other guys when I married my husband, I just wanted to take them back and only have them for him. good luck :)
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well first off u arn't ugly or fat ur beatuiful with in ur wself and u have to keep tellin ur self that right now i wouldn't be worry about a boyfriend all guys are dicks and they just want sex and ur turn will come when u find the most prfect boyfriend and all ur friends will be jelous when u find some one who like u for u and about cutttin it don't help much it hurts u more in the end i should know i did it and some guys get turned off when u tell them u cut ur self so i would stop and about the counslor thing if u really have to go them tell ur parents be like mom dad i think i need to see a conslor and if they ask y be like i need some one to talk to beside u guys and hopefully they will understand just plz stop cuttin u are beatuiful u don't need scares to prove that hope this helps
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well stop cutting!!! and if u rele feel this way try losing a little weight or being more confident in yerself...if u believe ur pretty everyone else will believe it too <3
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Ok, your 15 everyone thinks that stuff about themselves. And, I know what I am talking about because I also am fifteen. Just don't cut yourself. That is definetly not a good idea, but what is, is finding what youi like about yourself. Just think for a moment about all your talents. And don't you dare say you don't have any because we all do. Then, try to remember that your friends are your friends and they won't care at all about how you look. However, if you are that upset with your appearence, you could do things the harder way with diet and excersise. I hope that you can reallize that you really are a good person, and become more self confident.
Lots of Luck,
Ann
P.S.
Don't worry I have never had a boyfriend either.
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