my plant, gromie, just winked at me. it kidna scares me. i am really upset with his behaviors! what should i say to my naughty naughty venus fly trap? should i tell him to be a good boy, or just ignore the cute little guy?
xOcRaZiCrAcKaox answered Friday November 12 2004, 11:37 am: Pssh, obviously hes in love with you! Give him a chance and feed him some chocolate covered strawberries ;-) lmfao. And afterwards, go check yourself into the mental hospital. Hav fun..Ha..
Ronlina answered Thursday October 14 2004, 12:07 am: He's obviously fiesty and seemingly frustrated on many levels. The delicacy of such a plant's state of mind is at peril, and I suggest that you do the following immediately.
Find someone you don't care much for, and lock said person in a dark room with the plant for a minimum of seven hours "counselling" time. This therapy is almost garenteed to settle your beloved plant down while simotaneously getting rid of any unwanted neighbors, animals, or unruly children. [ Ronlina's advice column | Ask Ronlina A Question ]
koshii answered Wednesday October 13 2004, 9:05 pm: When this behavior occurs in male venus flytraps, it is often an attempt in communication with a different species--namely, you--in order to attract their attention to a plight they feel is necessary.
Examine Gromie's planting material and make sure he has enough moisture to keep his cells taut with water. His leaves should be erect and bright, free of dust and not scarred by mistreatment. Be certain there are no parasitic insects harming his planty flesh.
Increase Gromie's ultraviolet-light intake by opening a window or moving him close to a natural light source. Brush him gently with a soft paintbrush to make him feel pretty.
If you feel he may be hungry, find a small child whose parents dislike it and marinate it with lemon and cilantro, and feed it to Gromie. He may take some time to digest it due to difficult materials such as polyester and teeth.
Care of Venus Flytraps is based on careful communication between you and your plant. Because Gromie has no vocal cords, pay attention to his body language to determine his needs and his emotions. Do not speak sharply to him unless he severely oversteps his boundaries (such as attempting to digest your flesh instead of that of his accepted food). With time and gentleness you may find that he will give you love and affection. [ koshii's advice column | Ask koshii A Question ]
chaos answered Tuesday October 12 2004, 7:04 pm: Did you breathe on it? You know some plants just take things too far. I had a plant once that liked to lean from side to side in its pot, so I put it on a turntable. [ chaos's advice column | Ask chaos A Question ]
Dimitris answered Tuesday October 12 2004, 2:40 am: First Roll up a newspaper, walk calmly over to the plant with the paper behind your back, as not to scare him off, then quickly smack it on the ....er....hmmmm Head I guess, if plants have heads. and in a strong firm voice say NO ! NO !.
Then what you do is look in the mirror and first person that you see repeat thee above as necessary
Dimitris. [ Dimitris's advice column | Ask Dimitris A Question ]
K3587 answered Tuesday October 12 2004, 12:07 am: Oh man, that plant is showing the first symptoms of "Love em and leave em syndrome". Basically, the plant is becoming sexually attracted to you. Over time, you will give into your desires and have hot, nasty sex with a totally different kingdom of lifeform.
This will continue on for a while, and the sex will be the best you've ever had...and the best you'll EVER have. Because soon, the plant will become disinterested in you, and thoughts of lechery soon turn to homicide. One night during your physically impossible lovemaking sessions, the plant will slit your throat and rape you as you bleed to death. Your last breath and your final orgasm will coincide; but hey, at least it's a good way to go.
xokaylanicoleox answered Monday October 11 2004, 11:36 pm: i hope your joking bc no offense but plants dont wink they are just plants they cant do anything humans can do and they especially cant talk to you. how are they good anyways? they live their life the only way they know how and they dont do anything else. anyways thats kinda strange .. just leave it alone. -kayla [ xokaylanicoleox's advice column | Ask xokaylanicoleox A Question ]
pinkygrl336 answered Monday October 11 2004, 11:02 pm: OK you know what..usually im nice on these things but you dont need no website sweet thing..you need Psychological HELP from a professional...plus, i dont htink the plant is scaring you i think you are scaring the plant. Dont talk to plants, and if you are the same person who also said you are attracted to plants, then you are one sad person who has no life and has to have plant friends..hwy wont you go screw a plant..:-) [ pinkygrl336's advice column | Ask pinkygrl336 A Question ]
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