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Hey everyone. I love giving advice, dancing, playing the piano, flute, and piccolo, talking on my cell, being on the computer, watching tv, eating, sleeping, and hanging out with friends and stuff! Yep. Ask me a question. I like those. I heart you!
♥ Erin




advice

15/f


Why is it that whenever a person tells another person a secret or something ...some kind of news.....and that person is close to the other person...and no matter how much you BEG them...and PLEAD NOT to tell the secret...they still ALWAYS do.

What does this mean? Should I stop telling people secret stuff?...I mean....How can I NOT?....I tell my own SISTER stuff....and she spills the beans.


How can this be stopped?


What should I do if I crave to let my emotions and secrets out? Because there's a lot building up inside of me over time. And I can't be trusting of ANYONE anymore...since like all of them (the people) basically stuck a fork up my ass. And backstabbed me with a dagger.

:(

Tell a pet. I'm pretty sure they won't say anything. :]

Sorry if u don't even have one, causing this advice to be completely useless. :/

But in that case, writing in a journal or something like that might be helpful. :]

♥ Erin

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a lot of my friends have drifted away. what are some activities/ things i can do to get them back and let them know i still care?

Something similar happened to me not too long ago. My best friend who I went to dance class with, quit, so I hardly ever see her anymore. She has a job and is really busy and everything, so it felt like we were drifting apart. But I talked to her about it on the phone, and she felt the same way, and now we're trying harder to make plans together. Try that, hopefully things will work out. Good luck! ♥ Erin

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last year. i had like a big group of friends. and now this year. it feels likes they dont think about me as much. like im just sorta there then like theyre best friend or just friend. my best guys friends are all of a sudden BEST friends with my BEST girlfriends and its like okayy what about me. every1 has a bst friend now and its like i dont. i dont want to be the center of theyre world but i mean i dont want to be invisable either

The same thing happened to me in 7th grade. You just have to forget about them, because they're not being your friends. I know exactly how that feels. I had these 4 friends back then; 2 of them were best friends and the other 2 were best friends, and they were all friends, and I was just a 5th wheel. Just make new friends, or start talking to the ones you don't normally talk to. That's what I did, and now I have lots of friends. Good luck, hope I helped! ♥ Erin

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My friend told me that he was moving away...I'm very bummed about it but I dont know what I can do...Can someone please help me like how did you feel and what did you do and everything. Thanks a lot!

Hey! Well, that's never happened to me, but there are some things that you can do to stay in touch. Sometime before he leaves, have a party with him and your friends, and have someone videotape the whole thing, and then later on, when you miss him, you can watch the tape. Oh, and if you don't already have xangas, you can get one and look at each others, so you know what's going on in his life and everything. And maybe once a week or so, watch a movie together over the phone. You can even send each other little gifts through the mail. And try to call as much as possible. And maybe once a month or something, if he's not TOO far away, maybe you can visit each other. Good luck! I hope I helped! ♥ Erin

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Ok, this is how it is. Have 2 bestfriends at school; we have been friends 4ever. Anyway one of my friends {Lets call her Karla}found out that my other bf {Lets call her Tisha} was talking about her behind her back. It's very hard 4 me because everytime I talk to 1 of them the other 1 asks if she said anything about her. It's driving me nuts! I don't know if I can take it anymore. Anyway I've been friends with "Karla" longer than I have "Tisha". I've known "Karla" 4 about 8 years, and I've been friends with "Tisha" 4 about 2 years. I'm so confused and I cannot deal with it any longer. Anyway school is almost out, so maybe everything will get solved. {We only have 4 days left} But I really need help! Since there's only 4 days left I've been thinking of not talking 2 any of them? What should I do?

I RATE HIGH!

That's a really tough situation, but you just need to tell them both (separately) how it's making you feel. Tell them that you feel like you're caught in the middle and that it's really frustrating to see them both fighting. If they're really your friends, then they will stop putting you in the middle and spare your feelings. But don't stop talking to them, because they'll just get mad at you, and then you won't have any best friends. And if you know what they are fighting about, maybe you can try and help them to solve it. Good luck! Hope I helped! ♥ Erin

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I have been going out with my boyfriend for 6 months. Lately though he has been acting really possesive. He wont let me look at other guys and everytime I have to do homework or a school project with another guy, he always thinks I have a crush on the guy. What should I do to get him to quit acting so possesive? Thanks a bunch!

Ok, I think you should just talk to him about it. You have to let him know that you trust him and he needs to trust you, too. Trust is really important in a relationship. Try getting a group of your friends, including guys and invite him. Then show him that you have no interest in any other guy, and he'll trust you more. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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well my bestfriend pressures me. she wanted me to spend the night last night but i was tired from a trip and did not get back till midnight. She is always getting mad at me for that stuff what should i do?

Try talking to her about it. She's being way too controlling. Try writing her a nice note or an e-mail and explain how you feel. If she doesn't change, try looking for better friends. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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Hello! I am a 24 year old male in seek of a female. I really need help with what to do and how to do it becasue everyone thinks that it is impossible for me to get one after several attempts of people trying to help me. I really want someone that I am compatable with and that will make me happy...ect. Does anyone have any ideas? Oh yea and does anyone know what to do with this situation... there are a lot of girls YOUNGER than me that have "crushes" on me and I dont know what to do and how to get them off of my back before I get in trouble for something that I didnt do! Please help
**Lovelost**

Hey, I'm sorry! Lol. Try doing those online dating services. My brother, who's 19, did this and found someone. It didn't work out too long, but that's just because he's a jerk, lol. I'm 16, but I still know how you feel. I want to find that someone, too. Try going to different parties, or have one of your own, and tell your friends to bring all the girls they know! As for the younger girls, just tell them you're not interested or avoid them any way you can. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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ok well i have a friend but lately shes been pissing me off... last year she made out with this guy and all they did was kiss but she went around telling people that he fingered her... then this year she hooked up with him again but she says she doesnt like him anymore... she still like makes out with him and i guess its like the "friends with benefits" sort of thing but i get so mad at her because i know the only reason shes doing it is to be "experienced" so she thinks shell be cool... then she tells me not to tell anyone but she like advertises it all over her live journal thing... the rest of the people that know are annoyed by it too and i dont want to talk to her because everytime i talk to her about anything negative she takes it way to personally and gets all mad... help!
-i rate 5s for good answers

Try writing her a NICE note (since she takes things personally) or email. Tell her how you feel, but don't be mean about it. Explain it to her nicely. End with saying everything you like about her, so you won't leave her at a bad note. If she's mad at first, don't worry, she'll get over it. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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I don't have a lot of guy friends because i get really shy around them and barely talk to any boys. I want friends that are guys but i don't no how to talk to them. Is it a bad thing that i don't have boys as friends? How can I be myself around them?

You just have to be calm. I know it's hard, but the more you talk to them, the less nervous and shy you'll be around boys. To solve the problem, you just have to face it! That's how I overcame it. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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i have a friend who used to be very down to earth and friends with everyone. now she is "popular". Just because of that, she thinks she is better than everyone else, and everyone agrees. she is snobby too, like saying stuff like "omg i hate fat people, old people, smelly people, and people that dont like me." the problem is, i love being friends with her!! she is so much fun to hang out with when there are not other people there. with other people, she seems to think she needs to act like that. when i ask her why she is so mean to me, she says "you are mean to me because you think you are so much better!!!" what should i do?!?!

Try talking to her about it. Tell her that she doesn't need to act like that when she's around other people, you already know she's cool. A good friend will listen. If she doesn't change after awhile, try looking for other friends. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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hey i'm in college and i'm really shy. i can't seem to make friends with anyone in class. i have friends in my dorm and im comfortable with them, but i see people in my class that i would want to be friends with, but i can't seem to get myself to talk to anyone. i like crawl inside myself and no matter what i can't say anything. especially to guys (im female). i've been trying real hard to open up, but i just can't seem to do that. any advice on how to start opening up and becoming more comfortable with myself and be able to talk to people without being scared that they won't like me? i know im in college and shoud be over that already, and i am for the most part, its just when im surrounded by people i dont know it makes it really hard. thanks in advance to anyone who answers this

I'm really shy too, but what helps is putting yourself in their shoes. Pretend like they're the ones coming to you. If you don't think of them as losers, they won't think that about you either! Trust me, this works for me. You have nothing to be afraid of. You seem like a nice person, they have no reason to NOT like you! Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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i have this friend who is so selfish. she told me that if i went out with his guy named matt that shed hate me more then her friend olivia. i really like her as a frind..but i want your opinion..thanx

She has no right to do this! A friend would accept who you're going out with, even if she didn't like him. Trust me, she's not a true friend. I would go out with Matt and get a new friend. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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Since September, I have been friends with a girl, we are both 13. I really like her but I am very worried about her. Before she came to our school, her Step-Father, she hasn't seen her biological father in 10 years, threw her, her Mother and her sister out of their house and they had to move back here.

Since then, she has been cutting her wrists and talking about how she wants to kill herself. Recently, she has started taking paracetemol everyday because she says that she gets headaches and feels ill if she doesn't have any. She used to smoke and I know she still has cigarettes at her home in case she needs them, I'm worried she might start again.

She hates her Mother and yesterday she told me that her Mother is moving to another city and leaving her and her sister, who is 14, behind. I can't tell anyone because if I do, my friend will be put in care and she will never forgive me. No one else knows about all this except me and I am so worried about her.

I don't know what I can do to help her, I am going through a difficult situation myself and I'm so wrapped with it that I don't know how to cope with my friend as well. I have tried talking to her and telling her to get help but she wont and there is no way I can make her. I don't know what to do, I can't tell anyone and she wont get help. I'm so scared that one day she really will kill herself, she's threatened to so many times. What should I do?

Tough situation...
Well, you have to decide what's more important: losing her trust or letting her die.
I would tell someone, and trust me, eventually, she will forgive and she'll know that you did because you care about her, even though it'll take some time. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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I have this friend and i always tell her who i like and she talks to him about me, like not in a bad way but in a good way, but every person i like they end up likeing her! what do i do!?

Well, instead of having her talk to the guy, just talk to him yourself! Because whenever she talks to them, they start to like her, so if you talked to him instead, they'd like you! Guys like it when you talk to them straight forward, they respect you more. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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Me n my two friends Lizzie n Jess are going to the movies. Lizzie is riding with her cousin, and is going to be hanging out with her the whole time. Me n Jess hate Lizzies cousin, and don't want to ride with her, because we've had trouble with her cuz in the past. So, me n Jess have a ride there BUT not a ride home. We're meeting Lizzies boyfriend, and Lizzies like one of my best friends.. We asked her bf to take us home n he said sure. But Lizzies pissed and doesn't want us to. I'm not like that, and I'm not going to do anything with him, or act like a whore around him n stuff. I don't think she trusts me. She acts like she doesn't care, but you can tell when she does. What should I do?

You have to tell her that you're not like that! You probably have already, but you just have to keep telling her, so it'll get in her head. Just remember that true friends will trust each other, and she still doesn't trust you, she's not a true friend, even though you think she is. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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i have this friend and she wants to kill her self bc she thinks she doesnt deserve to be in this world and she is like always tellin me and her other friends that she is gonna kill herself and everytime she goes in a room she looks for sharp stuff to kill her self with and i get freaked out.. so if you have any advise plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz tell me i need help! me and her other friends are tryin to make her eat, not kill her self, think positive but nothing is workin plz help

Tell her that if she decides to leave the world behind, she's also leaving you and your friends behind. Tell her that you really care about her, and if she died, you would be sooooo sad and wouldn't know what to do. Somehow, you have to prove to her that she is loved. Try getting a party together with her family and friends, and she'll realize that people really do care about her. Also, point out everything she's accomplished over the years! She feels like she doesn't deserve to be in this world. I'm not sure why she feels that way, but if you do, you have to prove her wrong somehow! Make her a nice card with a note, it shows that you care. Good luck to you and your friend.
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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hi, i dont know if anyone remembers this but i wrote a little while back about a friend whos father had brain cancer, and he had a major surgery on the 1st day of school (september 2nd or so), the doctors werent sure if he would surive or not, my friend wasnt sure what to do. whether to go with his parents or go to school, because he hates to see his father in the hospital and all. so he came to me the night before. I told him no matter what he does his father will always love him and always be proud of him. he told me that i was scaring him like his father was, since right before i said that so did his father. I said i was sry and ill always support in anything. I know they went on vaca the week be4 so he got to spend time with him. then he had his 14th birthday in november. christmas and the new year. yeah well on monday my friend whos his gf said he wouldnt be in all week and she wouldnt say why and well last night my other friend asked me if i heard wat happened to him. i said no and that all i knew was that he wasnt gonna be in school all we, it turns out this pasted sunday his father had pasted :'-(. I dont know wat to do or how to support him, when he comes back to school next week. please help

Aw, that's so sad. What you need to do is either tell him or write in a note, that you'll ALWAYS be there for him if he wants to talk. People deal with this differently. Some want to talk about it and others don't. If he doesn't want to talk about it, just tell him that you're here and listening whenever he needs you. There's not much else you can do, you can't bring his father back. What would be really nice would be if you got him a nice card with a little note in it, because he'll know you care and that will make him feel better. Maybe get a big group of friends and make him a GIGANTIC card with little notes from everyone. That would sooo cute. Good luck to you and your friend.
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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I have these two friends one doesnt like the other and the other wants to be the other ones friend what should I tell both of them?

Tell your friend that doesn't like the other girl that your other friend is really nice. You have to target why she doesn't like her in the 1st place and work from there. The other girl who wants to be friends, have her write a nice note to the other girl and have her do something really nice, like bake cookies for her (I know, cheesy, but who doesn't like cookies?). She'll probably be caught off guard at her kindness and be nice back to her. That's just the way it works. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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ok there is a girl at my school that is like stealing my bestfriends and my best friends dont no it i feel like im a sucky friend and i dont no what to do they spend less time with me and like when i try to make plans with them they end up doing it but not with me but with the other girl i just cant take it anymore they treat me like crap and i dont no what to do i need help!!!!!!!

female 13

Try talking to them about how you feel. No one should be treating you like this. If it continues, you have to find better friends, because they're not being good friends at all. Good luck!
Hope I helped!
♥ Erin

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