about

First off that's my special man friend with me way back from high school, and been dating now for almost four years now. Yeah he's pretty spectacular, and I love him to pieces, and that's all I have to say about that. I'm a full time college student and working on my gen ed, but I would like to get my bachelor's in gerontology and eventually get my nursing license. In fact I work at a nursing home now as a CNA and I love it so much. Anyways ask questions if you want. I'll try to help you out anyway I can. I love helping people after all. :)

advice

Hi! I'm 13 going on 14 and there is a guy in school that I like. He's not good looking to others (but is to me in a weird way) and all my friends turn up their noses at him. We flirted over Skype and in class for a while and he eventually asked me out.

I panicked. I was scared about what others would say and how badly this would go. I think I'm a commitment-phobe. So I made up this guy and said we were already dating. I know it's one of the worst things to do and I feel horrid.

We're still friends and we still flirt (after I said I broke up with that guy) and I thought he still liked me. A few days ago, he said over Skype that he was so alone. So I comforted him and did what anyone would do. He said all his friends were dating and I said I wasn't. It was the biggest hint I've ever given... -_-'

He didn't get it and went on to say the girl he likes won't ever like him. I'll spare you the long story but this was some complete bimbo who would never look twice at a sweet guy like him. I find that horrible.

Even though he likes this girl, he always says to me that I'm pretty on my worst days and that any guy would be lucky to have me. We still flirt all the time! I feel like he is sending me mixed messages though.

Do you have any advice to give me on any/all of this? I feel too embarrassed to tell my friends because none of them like him. Thank you in advance if you reply. Sorry about the length. I at least hope I entertained you with this. :)

You're still a baby! You need to focus on school, you don't need a boyfriend... You have your whole life to worry about that sorta thing, and don't need to worry about doing so right now. Besides if you really did like the guy that much to begin with you wouldn't let the negative comments from your friends to effect it at all. Just proves you have more growing up to do. Your probably a really sweet little girl, but honestly hon, you still have quite a bit of maturing to do. Nothing wrong with it; I was the same way at your age. You see your peers have boyfriends and you feel like you don't fit in because of the fact you don't have one. In due time you will find the right person. Just do things you enjoy right now. Don't be in such a hurry to grow up, cuz honestly it's not all it's all it's cracked up to be.

xoxo,
dottie4

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Please help!!! Worried about my boyfriend.

Well I ve been with this guy for like 8 months. It s a long distance relationship. He lives in a different state. . well he treated me like shxt and he says he does it because he's stressed out. And I was gon leave him a acouple of days ago and he said he was gon kill himself. Well earlier yesterday , he said he was in danger and that he needs me and to stay with him. He said something about people putting him in a gas chamber and that he gets gassed and he's going to die. Idk if that's another excuse of him trying to keep me in the relationship. I tried to call his phone but it went straight to voice mail. I haven't talked to him in a day. hes been stressed out. I can't stop crying im worried

If he has threatened to kill himself, I suggest you call the police and tell them what is happening. They can give him the help he needs;i.e. medications, counselors, etc. It's not your responsibility to stay with him and risk your own health & well-being which is what you're doing right now. You have a good heart but you need to take care of yourself too. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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I am a quiet person and i don't talk that much, I have been like this ever since i was born. My boyfriend is always complaining, saying that i don't talk about romantic things or emotional things, things that can strengthen our long relationship. he said that i always talk about every day mundane things. can you please advise me about romantic things or emotional things that i can talk about?

Sorry it's been a while. I have been in the same boat. I dated the same person for two years then he went to the military and things just sorta phased out. It's hard to keep a relationship going when you can't see them often as you would like. The best thing I can tell you is just try to let him know how much you care about him; maybe watch a movie that neither of you have seen and can talk about it after, or a book, maybe a tv show. Get on skype that way you can actually "see" each other. May not be the same as being with the person but it can be comforting. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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14/f
i used to go out with this guy who kept switching between me and my used to be best friend and i broke up with him about 5months ago (ex # 1)then he went out with my ex friend and they broke up i was in a relationship with my exs bff (ex # 2and we broke up now ex # 1 told 1 of my friends he wants to date me again but hes going to wait a while to make a move what should i do when he does make a move sorry if this sounds confusing

You're just a kid. Focus on school... :/

xoxo,
dottie4

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Hi im a 14 year old female, i know , young. But i have a boyfriend of 2 months and i like him alot but i feel like im starting to loose feelings , like i wanna be flirty with other people and not tied down, but if i do break up with him i dont wanna miss him. He gets mad over the littlest things and hes grounded so how am i supposed to have feelings if we can barley talk ?! If you were in my situation what would you do?

You're very young and will prolly have at least a dozen boyfriends in your lifetime before you finally find the "one" so it's really not a big deal. Just be kind, and break up with him in person, try to be as private about it as possible like after school or something. Just say it's not working out and that you care about him, just not in that way anymore. Eventually he'll get over it and you'll both be happier in the long run.
Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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person you actually met in real life rather than like a celebrity

My sister is about 7 years older than me. I actually have had crushes on a few of her guy friends. Also my dad has a few friends that are younger, like mid 30s; when I was younger I thought a few were pretty cute.

But I'm actually older then my manfriend I've been with for three years; by 28 days! :p

xoxo,
dottie4

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Hi everyone, id appreciate that if the person reading this would understand my points of views, my decisions and to try to understand how I think. Me and this guy really hit it off, we've been good friends for about 4 months and 2 of those months we started dating. We had intense chemistry, it was insane..we'd talk about how weird it is that we both feel so strongly about one another in such little time and how were shocked that we got close so easily. Now i know that some people believe that 2 months isnt a long time, and your right its not but this expirence taught me that no matter how little time you had with someone, sometimes 2 months can have more of an impact on both your lives than 2 years. What happened was that he was really affectinate and loving in the begining of our relationship, then he randomly stopped calling or being as sweet with me. I wont get into details because i dont feel its neccasary, he just randomly called me asking me to meet him cause he wanted to talk, so i said okay and went then he tells me he isnt happy, he feels like we arent sweet with eachther anymore Ofcourse i let him know that its his fault, and that im the one whos always trying to be cute and call and do and say sweet things but he never budges (which is completely true) so then i asked him this : I was like, "Do you love me, or do you just have some feelings for me, because i really do love you, a lot" then he was like "Look i have feelings for you for sure, but im not crazy about you, i think your more inlove with me than i am with you thats for sure" Honesty is the best policy, and i dont blame him for being honest, HOWEVER i am not the kind of girl that can be with someone that i love more or care for more, someone who believes he has the upper hand in the relationship ( and he has shown me that he thinks he does in many ways) so i ended it, i told him that i dont deserve that and that i should be loved in the same amount in return, why should i love someone any less? and why should he be with someone that he wants to feel more for? it makes no sense to me. Our break up wasnt terrible, we were both sad. But i made sure he knew that my dignity was above everything else and that no matter how much i love him, ill always love myself enough to walk away from anything that i feel isnt fair to me. He contacted me after a few days (4 to be exact) asking how i was, i said i was fine and he said he was great and the conversation just ended. You guys, i am so inlove with him i cant even explain, i dont know what to do or how to act anymore, i dont even know what hes thinking or have an idea about it, im really hurt and would love some guidance, please tell me what i should do? do you think him seeing how strong i am and independent will make him think twice ? Thank you all for reading this and please no harsh judgement :)

Honestly, no judgement intended but I really don't think anyone can fall in love in a short of time period as you too have been together. It's called "infatuation" which can feel like "love" when in fact it's not. If you two are broken up you need to just let him go and date other people. It may feel like your world is in crumbles right now but it's really not. There's TONS of other guys waiting to meet such a sweet compassionate person such yourself that you actually WILL fall in love with. Or who knows?? Maybe this guy is the "one." my boyfriend and I didn't talk to each other for six years, he was my first boyfriend, first kiss, and first date (dated each other for six mths and then broke up) but now we've been together for 3 years and I truly do believe he is the one and I love him SO very much. I am a true believer in the saying "If you love something set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was." So if your really love him, let him go, he just may come back and it will be better then ever before! Much love!

xoxo,
dottie4

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Hi So I hooked up with this guy the other night and we texted all weekend and he said he was looking forward to hanging out with me next week and that he would call me on monday. It is now tuesday and he still hasnt called me. Who texts to say they are going to call and doesnt? It seems like a lot of effort when he could have just not talked to me after our fling.

I know this sounds cruel but you shouldn't hook up with a guy you just met anyway. As the old saying goes, "Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?" Not trying to offend you but that's the way it goes. He prolly was just trying to put you down nicely to try to avoid hurting you, and hoping you would get the point. Just try not to move things so fast next time; especially if it's a guy you really, really like. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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Hii
i was into a relationship frm last 4 yrs.. N v broked up few mnths back.. V had sex on a normal basis..Now i gotta new guy n he thinks that m virgin.. Can anyone pls suggest me how to show d fake virginity..
Thnx

Don't lie to him... There is no shame in the fact you had sex, it happens. You were with someone for a very long time who you probably had a lot of feelings for. If you feel like you have to lie to him, let him go. It's better off for you and him. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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Can a guy get pregnant from another guy

Yes.. Here's proof!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/07/03/thomas-beatie-pregnant-ma_n_110733.html

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F/16
I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 months now, we've been really good together but lately he's been acting a bit cold. He doesn't text me that often anymore, or when he does... It's always me texting and starting the conversation first, he's acting like he's not interested anymore. I will admit, I'm telling him what to do, well not necessarly telling him. But whenever he does something I don't like, whether it's hanging with girls or speaking to them etc, I tend to go moody and be really stressy. I have no idea what to do, I've tried to ask him if I've done anything wrong but he says I haven't and goes back to being cold. He's never affectionate towards me anymore, I never hear the words "I love you" unless it's me saying it and then he obviously says it back. I have no idea on what to do, I know you can't make someone stay when they want to leave but he's not said he doesn't want to be with me anymore, but that's how it feels. I don't want to lose him, I really don't, but I'll give it another month and I feel as though I will have lost him by then. Coming from a male themselves, and obviously a female, can you both give me your opinions on why he's gone cold and what I should do to over come this? I'd really appreciate it.

You are still very, very young. I know it's hard but it's probably best for you to just let him go. And I don't mean to sound cruel, but I don't think you really love him, you've only been dating each other for two months, but no worries.. Extremely common :) If it's meant to be you guys will get back together. My high school sweetheart and I ended up back together seven years later, but in high school we broke up of course, dated other people, etc. I wish you the best of luck hun. If this isn't meant to be, you will find someone who is.

xoxo,
dottie4

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Can a girl get pregnant from precum if both of you are wearing underwear and there is no penetration, and you didnt ejaculate?

More than likely not but you do risk getting STDs like HPV so I suggest being extremely careful. HPV can be spread through any skin to skin contact, even with using a condom.

There are no tests now to test men to see if they have such a disease, but there is for women. As a result men can contract the disease, not show any symptoms, and spread it around to multiple women. They can find out through an HPV test or an abnormal pap smear.

Statistics state 3 of every 4 women get the disease at some point in their life. You need to be extremely careful nowadays, even with just fooling around.

You can go here for more information on HPV
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/stds-hiv-safer-sex/hpv-4272.htm

I don't mean to freak you out, but it's just the way things are. I suggest you and your partner get the vaccine (Gardasil) which protects you against two types of the main types of HPV that cause cancer and the main type that causes genital warts.

Better to be safe than sorry. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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so me and my bf were on a break and i was texting my guy friend about what i should do. I still really love him and i wanted to work things out. he looked through my phone and saw that i was talking to him and some other guy but they were just friendly conversations. it wasnt flirtatios at all. My ex got upset and broke up with me. He thinks that i was talking to these guys throug out our entire relationship. i wasnt. i really want to work things out with him. and he said we can start by being friends and work up from there. my question is how do i show him that i love him and that i want to work on us.

If I were you, I'd just let it go. If he acts this jealous because you happen to have a few male friends, you're better off without him. Unless you're going on dates, or having sex with these guys there is no reason why he should be acting like this.(Or if it's an ex) However, if that isn't the case, he sounds like an extremely irrational person and it also sounds like he's a control freak.

However if you really want to work it out with him, tell him how you feel. Explain to him he's acting unreasonable, and that you don't have interest in these guys on any romantic level whatsoever. If he's not willing to admit any guilt, let him go.In other words, walk away and let him find someone else who will let him manipulate them.

Good luck!

xoxo,
dottie4

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i like this guy he never to me everytime he sees me he stares or he just look away so

Give him a goofy face next time he stares at you and then smile, maybe wink at him after...I did that with my manfriend now and we've been dating for almost a year. :)

xoxo,
dottie4

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I am on my fourth girlfriend and all of the rest broke up with me saying they dident even like me, I am in middle school I found this girl that I really she could be the one but that's what I thought about the others what should I do?

Haha! I saw this and had to post something.It brought back memories of my youth. :) Coconutcatastrophe is right, don't worry about girls yet. If it makes you feel better I didn't even have my first boyfriend till I was a freshmen in high school. Inevitably, just like most relationships formed in highschool, we broke up. We didn't realize we were meant to be together until 6 years later. LOL! But yeah, just get involved in hobbies. If you would like to learn an instrument get in band. If you want to learn a sport do that than. You are VERY young and have your whole life ahead of you. If you see a cute girl there's nothing wrong with hanging out with her, but don't get your heartbroken if it doesn't work out. Right now you should be enjoying your life, not worrying about having a date on Friday night even though it does sound like you are VERY popular.

xoxo,
dottier

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m/26 gay,well I have a boyfriend whom I relly love with all my heart and been dating for almost three years now,but over the whole last year we've been going through a lot of hardships,a lot of arguments and problems,we are not happy anymore I reckon,I'm really sad 'coz he has tried to dump me like a hundred times,and I've always begged him not to do it.Currently, I cannot stop crying bc I have realized that he no longer cares whether I'm out of his life or not,so I'm seriously thinking about moving on with my own life and just forget everything about him but it just freaks me out the idea of being alone again and miss him too much,help?THANKS!

I can definitely relate to this one... I was dating the same guy for 3.5 years, not much longer than you and this one. What ended up happening was he left for the military and we ended up breaking up. Things happen, and people move on with their lives. As you can imagine for the first 6 months I was heartbroken. I didn't want to be with anyone, see anybody, or do anything. However I knew I had to go on with my life. I got involved with volunteer work, joined clubs on my campus, and started hanging out with friends, etc. Just start doing things for yourself and don't be afraid of being alone. If you like music, start going to see live shows, just put yourself out there. You won't regret it. Hope I helped out a little.

xoxo,
dottie4

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im 13/f, im 85 pounds, and i can call myself pretty(: its okay to think your pretty and fit right? Never have i ever hugged a cute boy, dated, had my first kiss, made out, lost my virginity, humped, nothing! is that bad? im 14 in 5 months. i feel like everyone has! especially dated, hugged, or had their first kiss! i havent, is that bad? plus my parents are super awkward, and i would never talk about boys in front of them. if i dated though, it would be a secret. should i be worried?

Nothing to worry about dearie. Don't be in a hurry to grow up. Enjoy your youth while you still have it. When you hit high school I am sure you'll tons of boyfriends.

xoxo,
dottie4

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I need help my wife s getting "bored" with our sex life how can I spice it up a bit to keep her interested?

Try it while she's on her heaviest flow.. That oughta keep you from being bored. ;)

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Ok well we live hour away not to bad of a drive I love her so who cares about the drive and go see her offten maybe every two weeks or week and how can you make her happy and when she's upset how to comfort her on the phone or txt I really love her she's my world I would not be able to handle the breakup if we brokeup ? Help me ideas anything ????

For one an hour is not that far away and I would not consider that a long distance relationship... I don't mean to sound harsh, but that's the way I look at it. Anyway this type of thing should not even be going through your mind (a possible break up) if your serious about this person. If she does not seem happy, I would just let her go. I would say skype with her, send her sweet text messages saying how how much you love her, and maybe even a letter every once in a while. Nothings compares to the old pen to paper. ;) You'll figure it out. Good luck.

xoxo,
dottie4

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I've been in a long distance relashionship with a boy who lives about 1,000 miles from me. I know this may sound stupid but please just listen. We met on a teen chat room and i gave him my phone number (back in march) we started talking daily on the phone for hours.. We realized we were so compatiable and we decided to start dating. Mostly talks on the phone/ the occasional video chat. In August i convinced my mom to let me pay for a plane ticket for him to come here and go on vacation with us , she agreed. The day I met him at the airport was the best day of my life! We had the most amazing time ever at the beach but 4 nights and 5 days went very quick and before i knew it we were dropping him back off at the airport. Ever since he left that day things have been had. Always having that feeling of wanting something you know you can't have right now. We have been on/off for the past couple months not because of fighting or anything but because its been hard not being able to be with eachother. We have recently gotten back together . I told him that we might be moving down there in March ( which is true but i kinda think my moms just telling me what i wanna hear) If we don't move down there i told him i would pay for a plane ticket for him to come here in june and he could stay longer . I told him to not forget that in less then 3 yrs i would be eighteen and would move down there to be with him. & until that day i would keep paying for him to come here atleast once a year. We have been back on lately but last night he didnt text me or call me like he always does.. & so i knew something was up. I texted him n said "whats going on? :( ... & this morning i woke up to a 2 page message from him saying how he talked to his DAD and decided he just wanted to stay friends until i moved down there if i did. he said that he wanted to still be friends n he would still tell me he loved me because he does and always will. I cried when reading this. I'm very sad and haven't texted him back. Why can't he just wait until June then we can be together for like 2 weeks ... why cant he just wait for me? I know he's the one & he's all i think about. I'm sorry for the long story i just needed to get this out.. does anyone have any advice for me please? :/

Hun, I know you are upset but you are still very young. Don't let this get at you too bad. You deserve someone who is close to you and who wants to pay for his OWN ticket to come see you. You have your whole life ahead of you and if it's meant to be, it would be. If not, then there's someone else out there for you. You shouldn't have to give up your whole life to go down there to be with him. He should want to be with you. A relationship will never work unless it's a two way street. You should both do for each other. I guarantee you will find someone who is special to you one day. :D For now, let this one be.

xoxo,
dottie4

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