about

First off that's my special man friend with me way back from high school, and been dating now for almost three years now. Yeah he's pretty spectacular, and I love him to pieces, and that's all I have to say about that. I'm a full time college student and I'm not exactly sure what I want to do yet but I'll figure that out eventually. Prolly something with the elderly though; their the best. In fact I work at a nursing home now as a CNA and I love it so much. Anyways ask questions if you want. I'll try to help you out anyway I can. I love helping people after all. :)

advice

Do you have any suggestion for a birthday gift that ALL men like? I don't know him that well, but I want to give him something he will really remember. :)

A good pocket knife, or make him a good steak unless he's a vegetarian, or take him out to dinner if you can't cook. If he's a gamer get him a game he doesn't have. Maybe a subscription to magazine. Hope I helped.

:)

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I know this may sound like a dumb question but I have dark reddish brown hair and really fair skin (like the skin of most redheads) it has pink undertones and it's freckled. Most brunettes I know even if lighter skinned aren't as light skinned as myself...?

Your probably a nice person but you don't need to be tripping on color. How old are you? Lots of people find red headed folk very attractive.

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I am a Christian and I'm working on being a better one, but I'll be the first person to admit that I'm far from perfect. I have debilitating guilt and shame about my past and even the way I came to Christ, even though that sounds strange now that I'm writing it.

I feel like everyone else has really great, inspiring stories and I have kind of a cowardice one. Long story short, I wanted to come to God for years, but thought that I was too bad to do so. Like God wouldn't want someone like me. I didn't have the courage to find out if that was true or not until I was sick and thought I might be dying soon. When I found out that you can be forgiven for anything, I asked Jesus into my heart. (I'm fine now BTW).

Getting to my problem, my dad will not stop judging me, or my family for that matter. He judges us for missing church and any sins we commit. He'll imply or flat out say that we won't go to Heaven because of certain things that he himself does.

I hope this doesn't sound like I'm being hypocritical and judging him, but he's got problems as well. He talks hatefully to my mom, he does rotten thing to people, he uses filthy language, he lies, he takes our things that don't belong to him and these are the kinds of things he judges us for. He'll come home from church and act this way. I've never habitually done all of these things and I've repented, but when I drop the ball, he's all over me. I'm not saying that my dad's a terrible man or that he's not going to Heaven, but I don't feel that he's in a position to look down his nose at me.

The worst is when he judges me for missing church. I admit that I've been bad about that, but church isn't the only place where I worship God with other Christians. I've heard that you don't have to go to church as long as you worship somewhere. It's not in the Bible. It's not that I don't like church, it's just a long story of why I don't go every single Sunday.

He's confident about his own salvation and that of certain people close to him. He just judges his household. It bothers me that he thinks I might not go to Heaven when he and some of the people close to him are no better than I am. It just plain bothers me that he judges me at all.

One reason I think it bothers me is because it makes me feel like such a loser. It brings back the guilt and shame I mentioned earlier. It also makes me wonder if I'll ever be the Christian I need to be. If my own dad doesn't have confidence in me, how strong of a Christian can I be?

What do you think of this situation?

Dude after reading your post I certainty don't think you're a loser. But my suggestion for what it's worth is to broaden your horizons. You seem like a sensitive, intelligent young person but fyi parents are not always perfect. Remain kind, sensitive,and patient with folks. Also find a spiritual path that may better suit you. Believe me there's no one size fits all. This may not be your cup of tea but check out the Catholic workers.

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Hi im a 14 year old female, i know , young. But i have a boyfriend of 2 months and i like him alot but i feel like im starting to loose feelings , like i wanna be flirty with other people and not tied down, but if i do break up with him i dont wanna miss him. He gets mad over the littlest things and hes grounded so how am i supposed to have feelings if we can barley talk ?! If you were in my situation what would you do?

You're very young and will prolly have at least a dozen boyfriends in your lifetime before you finally find the "one" so it's really not a big deal. Just be kind, and break up with him in person, try to be as private about it as possible like after school or something. Just say it's not working out and that you care about him, just not in that way anymore. Eventually he'll get over it and you'll both be happier in the long run.
Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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My younger sister is asked in my room doing something like jumping on the bed, trying on my jewelry, playing with my toys and electronics, taking things, playing with my trophies like they're dolls, out begging me to let her watch me get dressed. And everytime I invite friends over, she wants to tag along and tells my mom later,“I wanna have a play date with (friend's name) without (my name)" and acts like they're HER friends, not MINE. And when I go to my friends house without her, she throws a fit! You can hear her from across the street. And when I was watching a TV show, she ask of a sudden became a Jessie phsyco crazy mega long time fan. She always follows me, and when I went to a dance last night, she screamed and yelled and tried to steal my dress just because she can't go. And when I walk downstairs, she yells,“I WAS THERE FIRST" then cuts in front of me, and once she gets to the bottom of the stairs, she says,“I win I win I win I win" over and over again. When I'm sleeping during the day she kisses me until I wake up, and when I get dressed for a special occasion she starts walking like an elderly man who needs a cane and says that's how I'm supposed to walk, and then starts singing like a cat dying 9 times over, so loud that the people living downstairs start yelling. Any is my sister so annoying? I can never do anything without her wanting to tag along, and she never respects my privacy or items.

LOL! Little sisters and brothers are always annoying... I would know, I was one.. The reason I did it to my sister was I looked up to her and I loved her. I think it got to her and she finally broke down and told me that I couldn't act that way anymore and that she loved me very much but needed time for herself. After all, we even shared a room together.. LOL! Eventually she started making time for me. We would play school or she'd take me on bike rides just her and I. I loved that time where it was just her and I hanging out.. Now she's married with children and building her own life about 100 miles away from here... I see her & talk to her but not as much as I'd like for we are both busy! However I often think about the fun times we shared together just her and I. I know it's hard for you to comprehend this stuff right now, but eventually you miss that little annoying sister who is constantly vying for your attention, because deep down you know she just absolutely adores you and wants to just like her big sissy. One day you won't have that, you'll both be grown up and building your own families, or going to school, etc.
So my suggestion is do what my sister did with me. Tell her you love her very much but you have to have your own time. Ask her why she does this.. And then offer time where it's just you and her together doing girl stuff whether it be painting each others nails, playing school, barbies, or whatever you two decide to do together. Then explain to her that now sissy has to have her own time but remind her you love her very much and you two will spend more time together just you and her soon. I'm sure shew ill be a lot happier and you will too, and I'm confident she will not be quite as annoying... LOL notice I said quite... :) And then when you look years back at it, you will be so much happier and so will she that you had such a good relationship with your sister and love to have someone you can call up at any time just to talk or whatever your heart's desire. Hope I helped!

xoxo,
dottie4

P.S. Remember she loves you very much and just wants to be your mini me! ^__^

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person you actually met in real life rather than like a celebrity

My sister is about 7 years older than me. I actually have had crushes on a few of her guy friends. Also my dad has a few friends that are younger, like mid 30s; when I was younger I thought a few were pretty cute.

But I'm actually older then my manfriend I've been with for three years; by 28 days! :p

xoxo,
dottie4

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Hi everyone, id appreciate that if the person reading this would understand my points of views, my decisions and to try to understand how I think. Me and this guy really hit it off, we've been good friends for about 4 months and 2 of those months we started dating. We had intense chemistry, it was insane..we'd talk about how weird it is that we both feel so strongly about one another in such little time and how were shocked that we got close so easily. Now i know that some people believe that 2 months isnt a long time, and your right its not but this expirence taught me that no matter how little time you had with someone, sometimes 2 months can have more of an impact on both your lives than 2 years. What happened was that he was really affectinate and loving in the begining of our relationship, then he randomly stopped calling or being as sweet with me. I wont get into details because i dont feel its neccasary, he just randomly called me asking me to meet him cause he wanted to talk, so i said okay and went then he tells me he isnt happy, he feels like we arent sweet with eachther anymore Ofcourse i let him know that its his fault, and that im the one whos always trying to be cute and call and do and say sweet things but he never budges (which is completely true) so then i asked him this : I was like, "Do you love me, or do you just have some feelings for me, because i really do love you, a lot" then he was like "Look i have feelings for you for sure, but im not crazy about you, i think your more inlove with me than i am with you thats for sure" Honesty is the best policy, and i dont blame him for being honest, HOWEVER i am not the kind of girl that can be with someone that i love more or care for more, someone who believes he has the upper hand in the relationship ( and he has shown me that he thinks he does in many ways) so i ended it, i told him that i dont deserve that and that i should be loved in the same amount in return, why should i love someone any less? and why should he be with someone that he wants to feel more for? it makes no sense to me. Our break up wasnt terrible, we were both sad. But i made sure he knew that my dignity was above everything else and that no matter how much i love him, ill always love myself enough to walk away from anything that i feel isnt fair to me. He contacted me after a few days (4 to be exact) asking how i was, i said i was fine and he said he was great and the conversation just ended. You guys, i am so inlove with him i cant even explain, i dont know what to do or how to act anymore, i dont even know what hes thinking or have an idea about it, im really hurt and would love some guidance, please tell me what i should do? do you think him seeing how strong i am and independent will make him think twice ? Thank you all for reading this and please no harsh judgement :)

Honestly, no judgement intended but I really don't think anyone can fall in love in a short of time period as you too have been together. It's called "infatuation" which can feel like "love" when in fact it's not. If you two are broken up you need to just let him go and date other people. It may feel like your world is in crumbles right now but it's really not. There's TONS of other guys waiting to meet such a sweet compassionate person such yourself that you actually WILL fall in love with. Or who knows?? Maybe this guy is the "one." my boyfriend and I didn't talk to each other for six years, he was my first boyfriend, first kiss, and first date (dated each other for six mths and then broke up) but now we've been together for 3 years and I truly do believe he is the one and I love him SO very much. I am a true believer in the saying "If you love something set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was." So if your really love him, let him go, he just may come back and it will be better then ever before! Much love!

xoxo,
dottie4

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How? How on Earth do some people get hired? What can help me get hired? I swear they lie to us in high school about everything. I'm 18, college freshman. So far it's nothing what they said it would be. That's one lie. The second, branches out into many lies about lateness and "professionalism." I have friends who work at places such as McDonald's who show up late everyday, can barley speak English, have horrible attitudes, have no experience, go to interviews with ripped pants, smoke and drink, act ghetto, (My friend's manager uses the "N" word ON THE JOB!!" yet I cannot get one. Even after resume reviews and changes (Very short one at that as I have no experience) I've lost track of where I've applied to. The only interviews I've had were at Guitar Center twice. Nothing. It pisses me off even more when I see employees do things like text while talking to me, that happened at the movie theater. What can I do, resume, interview, action wise to improve my chances? And I'm not talking about some BIG suit and tie job. I'm applying for like dish washing and cashier jobs, minimum wage jobs. At my second interview, the guy said they have training for people with no experience so yeah. I recently applied for dish washing and had to answer over 220 questions. It requires 3 months of experience at a restaurant. But I mean c'mon most people have been washing dishes half their life by 18. It's really aggravating me. I put all this effort into optimizing resumes, knowing about products and the company, preparing for the interview, being better dressed than the interviewer and other interviewees. By the logic of my observation, if I show up to an interview late with wrinkled clothes, I'm GOING to get the job.

You should totally get into the line of work that I do! Either homecare or a nursing home. Plus, it usually pays more then minimum wage so that might be of benefit to yo as well. :) Only thing is you have to really have the heart and patience for it. A lot those type of jobs don't require you to have "experience." However they do check your references so be sure you have a few really good references such as ministers, teachers from your school, lawyers, doctors, etc. Good luck with everything.

xoxo,
dottie4

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Hi So I hooked up with this guy the other night and we texted all weekend and he said he was looking forward to hanging out with me next week and that he would call me on monday. It is now tuesday and he still hasnt called me. Who texts to say they are going to call and doesnt? It seems like a lot of effort when he could have just not talked to me after our fling.

I know this sounds cruel but you shouldn't hook up with a guy you just met anyway. As the old saying goes, "Why buy the cow if you can get the milk for free?" Not trying to offend you but that's the way it goes. He prolly was just trying to put you down nicely to try to avoid hurting you, and hoping you would get the point. Just try not to move things so fast next time; especially if it's a guy you really, really like. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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How do i get rid of dandruff. I have a bunch and im getting tried of it. When i wash my hair it comes out parctially. Whats the best way to get rid of themm

Use a dandruff shampoo. Also if you have itchiness in your scalp, which is often attributed to dandruff, you should put a small amount of vinegar in with your regular shampoo. I learned that in my cna class, and the last time I had an itchy scalp, I did just that and it really worked. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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Hii
i was into a relationship frm last 4 yrs.. N v broked up few mnths back.. V had sex on a normal basis..Now i gotta new guy n he thinks that m virgin.. Can anyone pls suggest me how to show d fake virginity..
Thnx

Don't lie to him... There is no shame in the fact you had sex, it happens. You were with someone for a very long time who you probably had a lot of feelings for. If you feel like you have to lie to him, let him go. It's better off for you and him. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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So Everything was fine until I had sex with my boyfriend a month ago(used a condom). The day after we had sex around my vagina was very itchy but I thought it was just because I had shaved before. After I kept itching it, it got swollen. It was better the next day. Lately it has been itching a lot and if I itch it to much it starts burning. Now it is mostly just the left side that is itching and there is white/dry skin around it(not on the lips but the skin beside it). It seem really irritated especially after I shave. The last time I have had sex was a month ago and nothing since then. Could it just be dry? could I have STD's? Why is it itching so much now? How would I know if I did have STD's or not? (no unusual bumps, No abnormal discharge, normal period)

I would go to your doctor immediately and get checked out. No one on here is qualified enough to answer questions like that. However, it could just be a simple yeast infection without the discharge. I've had that before, but I STILL went to the doctor to be sure. Hope I helped

xoxo,
dottie4

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Can a guy get pregnant from another guy

Yes.. Here's proof!

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/07/03/thomas-beatie-pregnant-ma_n_110733.html

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F/16
I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 months now, we've been really good together but lately he's been acting a bit cold. He doesn't text me that often anymore, or when he does... It's always me texting and starting the conversation first, he's acting like he's not interested anymore. I will admit, I'm telling him what to do, well not necessarly telling him. But whenever he does something I don't like, whether it's hanging with girls or speaking to them etc, I tend to go moody and be really stressy. I have no idea what to do, I've tried to ask him if I've done anything wrong but he says I haven't and goes back to being cold. He's never affectionate towards me anymore, I never hear the words "I love you" unless it's me saying it and then he obviously says it back. I have no idea on what to do, I know you can't make someone stay when they want to leave but he's not said he doesn't want to be with me anymore, but that's how it feels. I don't want to lose him, I really don't, but I'll give it another month and I feel as though I will have lost him by then. Coming from a male themselves, and obviously a female, can you both give me your opinions on why he's gone cold and what I should do to over come this? I'd really appreciate it.

You are still very, very young. I know it's hard but it's probably best for you to just let him go. And I don't mean to sound cruel, but I don't think you really love him, you've only been dating each other for two months, but no worries.. Extremely common :) If it's meant to be you guys will get back together. My high school sweetheart and I ended up back together seven years later, but in high school we broke up of course, dated other people, etc. I wish you the best of luck hun. If this isn't meant to be, you will find someone who is.

xoxo,
dottie4

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I really like this 13 year old boy, I am a 11 year old girl but he likes me too(bf, gf way) he grabs my ass and wants to kiss, he also puts my hand on his dick. Should I make out with him? Only problem is other 13 year old boy likes me too and we all live on the same street and hang out alot. What do I do?Also please don't give me any of that choose who u like and follow ur heart junk!

This is one of the sickest things I've ever read on this site... No wonder there are so many stds, and unplanned pregnancies today! You need to talk to an adult.. like now and get all this resolved. These guys should not be touching you the way they are and you shouldn't be touching them either. I suggest you not talk to these boys anymore... This is disgusting....

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Can a girl get pregnant from precum if both of you are wearing underwear and there is no penetration, and you didnt ejaculate?

More than likely not but you do risk getting STDs like HPV so I suggest being extremely careful. HPV can be spread through any skin to skin contact, even with using a condom.

There are no tests now to test men to see if they have such a disease, but there is for women. As a result men can contract the disease, not show any symptoms, and spread it around to multiple women. They can find out through an HPV test or an abnormal pap smear.

Statistics state 3 of every 4 women get the disease at some point in their life. You need to be extremely careful nowadays, even with just fooling around.

You can go here for more information on HPV
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/stds-hiv-safer-sex/hpv-4272.htm

I don't mean to freak you out, but it's just the way things are. I suggest you and your partner get the vaccine (Gardasil) which protects you against two types of the main types of HPV that cause cancer and the main type that causes genital warts.

Better to be safe than sorry. Hope I helped.

xoxo,
dottie4

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so me and my bf were on a break and i was texting my guy friend about what i should do. I still really love him and i wanted to work things out. he looked through my phone and saw that i was talking to him and some other guy but they were just friendly conversations. it wasnt flirtatios at all. My ex got upset and broke up with me. He thinks that i was talking to these guys throug out our entire relationship. i wasnt. i really want to work things out with him. and he said we can start by being friends and work up from there. my question is how do i show him that i love him and that i want to work on us.

If I were you, I'd just let it go. If he acts this jealous because you happen to have a few male friends, you're better off without him. Unless you're going on dates, or having sex with these guys there is no reason why he should be acting like this.(Or if it's an ex) However, if that isn't the case, he sounds like an extremely irrational person and it also sounds like he's a control freak.

However if you really want to work it out with him, tell him how you feel. Explain to him he's acting unreasonable, and that you don't have interest in these guys on any romantic level whatsoever. If he's not willing to admit any guilt, let him go.In other words, walk away and let him find someone else who will let him manipulate them.

Good luck!

xoxo,
dottie4

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I have been battling suicide for as long as i can remember. It started because i was being abused by my brother and i had parents who didnt help me or support me when i tried seeking help.
My only outlet was self harm and taking my friends left over valium.
Neither seem to help block it out anymore. I have no coping resources and ive always felt like i dont belong here, like im an alien. I have wanted to kill myself for a while but i always chicken out. How do i do this?

No one here is going to give you advice on how to kill yourself. You need to seek therapy. Tell an adult you trust how you feel.
1-800-273-TALK (8255) Call this too, it's the National Suicide Prevention Hotline. You can message me anytime you need too.
You may fee like nobody cares, but I guarantee you that you probably have more people that care about you than you think.
You need to get a handle on these feelings. Please don't kill yourself...

xoxo,
dottie4

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I have best friend which is a guy, he did something that upsets me. Well, he just made me look like a foolish girl. He wants me to be his BFF again but i made a condition.He will write a letter to me of how important our friendship is, He didn't wrote any but we are normal friends.

And what is it you need advice on? I'm confused...

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i like this guy he never to me everytime he sees me he stares or he just look away so

Give him a goofy face next time he stares at you and then smile, maybe wink at him after...I did that with my manfriend now and we've been dating for almost a year. :)

xoxo,
dottie4

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