Gender:
FemaleLocation:
KansasOccupation:
House wife, Mother, Local LoonAge:
35Member Since:
July 15, 2006Answers:
3333Last Update:
March 11, 2013Visitors:
124857Favorite Columnists
karenR
DangerNerd
Razhie
isis
theymos
Alin75
hitler_the_goat
ChevyIINova
MikeCFT
Elcee
AKSherma
more...
about
I'm a mother of 2 boys who are 13 months apart. Talk about a handful. I'm a wife to the best husband I could have ever dreamed of.I'm one of the very blessed.
I have Bipolar 1 Disorder. I hate taking all these medications and always going to doctors appointments, but life is too short to let mental illness get the better of me.
Often times life is a challenge, and nobody knows that better than me. I wake up wondering if this is going to be a day my illness overpowers my meds, and either sends me flying like a bat out of hell, or leaves me laying on the couch like a wet dish rag.
Thank all that is good in the world that I have an excellent support system at home.
I'm one of the lucky ones.
I'm honest, and that can either be a perk or s flaw. Depends on how you choose to look at it.
I like to see it as a perk, because it's better to hear the truth than to be told candy coated bullshit.
advice
have been dating my girlfriend Caitlyn for two years in October. She is the most amazing girl i have ever met and about 7 months ago i gave her a promise ring and i know Cait is the girl i want to spend the rest of my life with. Sometimes we get into little fights and blow them way out of proportion. About a month ago we had one of these fights and she wouldn't come to a party with me that night. I was pretty upset with her and At that party, i got pretty drunk and slept with a girl from another school. I didn't tell her about it and everything seemed like it was fine until this girl i slept with showed up at my baseball game and just so happens to sit down next to Cait and her best friend without knowing it was them. They start talking and pretty soon Becca, the girl from the party, has to go so she asks my girl friend if she could give me a ring back that i had left at her house (the promise rings we gave each other. i guess i left it there that night) of course my girlfriend gets curious why this girl has my ring and so she asks becca about it and she told her the whole thing. After the game Cait brought the ring up to me and said that my "little friend Becca" thought i would want it back and asked her to give it to me. I was totallly shocked and had no idea even what to say. Cait broke it off right then and there. I need to find some way to make it up to her. She is the love of my life and i totally regret what i did but she won't even talk to me which is really awkward since i am at her house all the time since her brothers are my best friends and her dad is my football coach. How can i get her back?
I don't know how you can get her back or if you even can.
The best thing I can tell you to do is have patience with her. She needs some time to sort out her feelings.
There really is no way to just "make it up to her."
Right now she is not only angry with you, but really, extremely hurt. She has lost all trust in you. You can apologize and apologize until you puke coat hangers, but right now she will likely not trust that you are really sorry.
Like I said, you are going to have to give her a little time to sort out her feelings. If she does decide she wants to get back together, you will have to accept the fact that she won't trust you at first, and she probably won't trust you for some time to come. You will just have to have patience with her on that, as well.
Regaining someone's trust is not an easy task. You can't just go out of your way to say "See, you can trust me, now." You have to prove to her that she can trust in you once again. I can't tell you how to do that. That is something you really have to figure out on your own.
As for the cause of this whole thing- the fighting- your best bet is to make a point not to fight over anything that isn't worth fighting about. It saves a lot of trouble and heart ache in the long run.
Good luck to you, and I hope that you get it straightened out in due time. :)
ygs-29/f
i had sex on saturday, and i got my period on monday. its now thursday and i still have it. but im worried because i read that a sign of pregnancy is a short scant period. so far its been normal, but slightly less heavy than in the past. but i know that symptoms of pregnancy dont usually occur until about 2 weeks later. this wasnt my first time having sex so it wasnt blood from that, and im ashamed to admit that the sex was unprotected, but he pulled out. but i know that precum can be a factor. is there a chance that i could be pregnant even though i got my period? thank you!
If your period is normal, then you most likely have nothing to worry about.
If you become 2 weeks late for your next due period, then you should be tested.
Next time, you can alleviate a lot of worry by using protection. You should always use a condom, considering it is the only thing out there that protects you from STDs.
ygs-29/f
well, i got my braces off the other day :]]], ive had them on for like 6 years. and my teeth are pretty discolored. to fix it, should i use teeth whitener? because ive heard it ruins the enemal in your teeth and such. so is it worth it? and dont say things like, "do lazer whitening" cause i think thats expensive isnt it? and if i do use teeth whitener, should i buy it in strips? or by a tube? THANKSS
Before you use any whitening products, you should be sure to have your teeth cleaned at the dentist or it won't work.
Try using the whitestrips (or any other product of your choice). However, once you remove the discoloration, you shouldn't do it much more after that, because you are right- whitening your teeth does ruin the enamel.
Those who keep their teeth paper white with whitening treatments to look good now are aging their teeth. Kind of like those who tan themselves to look good now are aging their skin.
ygs-29/f
I have a crack down one of my big toe nails. It's all the way down, it's been there for like 2 years or something haha.
I doesn't bother me but I'm a perfectionist and I want it gone. Is there anyway to get it gone or do I have to wait years for it to grow out? or will it ever grow out haha?
You could try to put super glue on the crack to help keeping the nail from continuing to crack as it grows out.
That also helps with broken fingernails.
ygs-29/f
What makes the tips of your nails white? I mean the natural white tip everyone has.
My tips have always been really white but some days it's a duller white and some days bits of the white goes completely clear.
Is there anyway to make them whiter or is it just a thing everyone is different with?
I always heard that a natural way to whiten the tips of your nails was to soak them in lemon juice.
ygs-29/f
I have the last book of Unfortunite Events, Its so long, I dont want to read the whole thing, whats the good parts and parts that I would care about?
The good parts and those that you would care about won't make a whole lot of sense if you don't read the whole book.
ygs-29/f
okay, so my friend's birthday is two weeks from now which also happens to be the day of our recollection. my other friends and i are planning a birthday surprise for her: we're gonna give her cake. and thats just it, i think. i just thought i'd wanna give her a gift too. i was thinking 1)a pen since our group name is named from a pen, 2)a novel, she likes reading novels, but i dont know, what if i get something she doesn't like? she's not the most appreciative person. 3)another cake. she loves to eat but maybe she'd probably have enough. IDK what to get her. but i wanna get her something special for her birthday. help me please?:)
lala 13/f
Get her something she likes, but not another cake. One cake is plenty. :)
If she likes to read novels, get her a novel she likes. You have 2 weeks to do some research into what she likes to read. Call her parents and ask her mother or someone what sort of story she likes to get into.
If she isn't appreciative, don't let it get to you. Some people are just that way, but YOU know you put a lot of thought behind the gift.
ygs-29/f
I'm 17, and 5 years ago something really horrible happened to me. I accidently let it slip to this guy I really like and he said he wanted to hear the whole story, but I was too scared to tell him then... I haven't been able to sleep for 3 days, and I think I do want to tell him what happened, but theres no way I can just bring it up in convresation, I'm too scared, plus he hasnt even mentioned it since I told him, I don't know if thats because he doesn't care or he thinks its what I want...
How can I tell him? Should I even bother?
If you are losing sleep, you should get it off your chest. Since it was something really bad that happened to you, he is likely not bringing it back up because he doesn't want to continue to rip open old wounds, not because he doesn't care.
Just tell him "I didn't tell you the entire story, and it's really bothering me." I'm sure he will be more than willing to listen to you and not be offended that you didn't tell him the whole truth before.
ygs-29/f
Whenever i shave my underarms,
I use shaving cream & a razr,
I get all of the hair off but
about five seconds after I shave
red bumps pop up everywhere in
my pits. Sometimes they irritate
me and they itch and then somtimes
they dont. But they are UNATRACTIVE.
Why is this happening?
It's razor rash, most likely. Try using a moisturizing shave cream.
ygs-29/f
is there any way to tell if you have mono without being tested? ive had it before and i know whats it like, but i guess i cant be too sure. i have all the symptoms except nausea which comes and goes. but other than that i feel the same way i did when i get it the first time. and i know its possible to get it more than once, and i was wondering if i could tell without getting a blood test. thank you
You need to go to the doctor. You never know, those may be symptoms of some other illness, and only your doctor can diagnose you.
ygs-29/f
i went to a party last night, fell asleep at about four in the morning and then woke up at like eight. (i know, not a good idea). i'm really hung over right now and i feel like crappp. does anyone know any remedies?
Eat. You don't want to, but you need to.
ygs-29/f
i had sex last night and we agreed that he would pull out, but i dont know if he actually did. i was wondering if you would be able to feel it? he wasnt wearing a condom, and im scared that he may not have pulled out. thank you.
No, not really. You have to basically trust him when he says he did. (Can't always trust that he did as he said, however, when discussing a teen boy with raging hormones...)
You need to use condoms, or some other form of birth control. You should be able to get condoms free of charge from your county health department if you can't afford them.
The pull out method is NOT an effective form of birth control. I have a baby that proves the pull out method is purely myth. Though there is nowhere near the amount of sperm in pre cum as there is in semen, there IS sperm there.
ygs-29/f
14/f
well ok, my bf and i have been going out for 10-11 months. Neither of us know what day it was when he asked me out. he thought it was november 5, but i know it wasnt b/c that was a sunday and he asked me out at school. i Know that it was in october. well anyway, we dont kiss much, and we've really only held hands once. so anyway, im going to start holding his hand and kissing him more this school year. (school starts this thursday). well anyway, hes not good at getting me presents... like my christmas present was from the dollar store, so was my easter and valentines presents. my b-day was just a week ago, and he said hes going to get me something, and i guess he will give it to me when school starts, (we dont see each other much in the summer, but we talk on the phone.) well anyway most of that is off subject, what should i get or make him for our year anniversary? and b/c i dont know the exact date, when should i give it to him? like the middle, beggining or end of october??? and i know its a bit early, but i like to plan ahead of everything!
please tell me what you think, and thanks in advance!
Many guys aren't good at buying presents as many girls are. So don't sweat over it if it comes from the Dollar Store- it is the thought behind the gift that counts, not the actual gift OR it's price tag.
I always thought it was a good thing for a guy to not by a high ticket item "because you are worth it", because to me that is him putting a price tag on me.
As for what you should make him or get him, I can't say, considering you know him and I know nothing about him. I would say making something, even if it is a home made card with some little poem you wrote. It would have more meaning because of the thought and effort you put behind it.
Since neither of you are certain on the actual day, then November 5 is close enough. The date certainly isn't worth fretting and stewing over.
ygs-29/f
I am a college student and engaged. I have been with my fiancé for over a year and a half. Because of a scholarship I have to wait over four years to marry him.
I can tell that he has lost sexual interest in me. It is not at the same level as it used to be. That is though to be expected and I understand that. He does occasionally look at pornography, and I am ok because it is not an obsession.
We played truth or dare one night, and from this I learned that he is extremely sexually attracted to my best friend. He proceeded to ask me questions as whether I would have a "threesome" with her or let him have sex with her. (He has never done anything sexual with another woman, and vise versa... so I somewhat understand the curiosity). During the game he dared me to ask her if she would be ok with that.... It tore me a part.
It was never spoken of again. Today I was looking through his history, and found that he was staring at a picture of her in a bikini. I confronted him; he admitted he was looking at her. I feel horrible, ugly, ignored, and most importantly emotionally abused.
How am I supposed to marry a man who will be lustfully looking at the bridesmaid more than the bride?
As we women favor touching and emotion, guys favor looking. However, in my opinion, there is a big difference between ogling a woman on TV and ogling your best friend. (Not to say he is ogling, but you understand what I mean.)
If you are planning to marry this guy, you need to, right now, sit down and talk to him about your feelings about his attraction to your friend.
And I agree with the person who told you that you should consider a break from each other. When you give yourself the "outside the box" look at the situation, you can better decide weather or not he is the right man for you to spend the rest of your life with.
Personally? No way would I marry a man who had such a profound interest in my best friend that he would be asking me such things as having a threesome, allowing him to have sex with her, and wanting me to ask her if she wanted to have sex with him. In my opinion, that is crossing way into the realm of disrespect.
I think you deserve a man who will treat you far better.
ygs-29/f
how do you feel about going on a double date w/ someone you just met.but that double date is w/ you and your best friend and her boyfriend
Actually, it is a wise thing to do if you are going out with a guy you just met.
If he turns out to be some sort of weirdo, it would be nice to have your friend and her boyfriend there to look out for you.
ygs-29/f
My boyfriend's dad has a business, his dad got very sick and now my boyfriend is working every single day, helping his family. I see him once every 1-2 weeks. I miss him and I know working this much isn't healthy but he tells me constantly he "has no choice". He's very family oriented so I wouldn't make him choose. It's just I would like to see him more, and besides it'll get his mind off work. What am I supposed to do? Wait it out and do/say nothing?
I think yes, you should wait it out, but don't just "say nothing." He is obviously going through a hard time in his family life and needs your support.
Working is not unhealthy. Some people work 2 and 3 jobs daily to support their families.
What he is doing is a good thing. It shows how much he cares about others, and how much he will sacrifice to ensure his family makes ends meet.
It shows that he feels family is the most important thing, which is nice to know if you ever plan to settle down with him.
With his dad being sick, he is obviously working to support the family. If he chose not to do that, where would his family be? They may get to the point of worrying where their next meal comes from if he didn't take over the responsibility.
So see, it isn't unhealthy. It is the right thing to do.
Hang in there, have patience with him, and support him during his family's time of need.
ygs-29/f
so my boyfriend travis and i have been dating for almost 7 months and basically im an idiot. i've cheated on him before but admitted to it then a couple of weeks later and well today we were talking on the phone and i lied to him saying my friend and i were going by to go get piercings and really we were going by another guy friend of ours house to go swimmming and so when my friend called me, i told travis to hold on and then was switchiing over to my friend and i guess i had linked the two calls instead on accident and so when my friend and i were talking he basically heard the whole story of how i might cheat and i was gonna hide the towels for swimming in my bag and everything. he then finally after a while told me that he was gonna go put the towels in his purse and i got the clue and i got scared and hung up.and ive been calling and texting him ever since and now idk what to do... i really messed up.
he's one of those typical nice guys.we havent said i love you yet and but we're pretty close.what do you think i should do? i know he's by his friends house (who by the way,hates me) because i passed by and saw his car.? :(
Since you can't be faithful, honest, or respectful of him, you should just let him move on with his life.
I mean, really, you are wasting his time and yours.
I think that if you want to run buck-wild, then you should do so as a single to prevent ripping out some poor guy's heart and stomping it into the dirt.
I'm quite sure that isn't what you want to hear, but it is the mature decision.
ygs-29/f
okay thank you but the only thing is it is lighter bleeding than my usual period and I think he toresomething deeper in so it is causing it to reopen
so maybe that's the case?
Hmmm... I would say that is highly possible.
If you are tore and continually bleeding for days, you should definitely call your doctor for their advice. I would say that in my opinion, such bleeding is not normal, but your doctor can give you the best advice on what to do. :)
ygs-29/f
I just had sex with my boyfriend 3 days ago and it was unprotected, yes I am aware it was completely ridiculous of me, yet I need some advice.I think I tore something because I have been bleeding on and off these past days yet not heavily, I know I did not "pop my cherry" because I've had sex before. I took a pregnancy test the next day yet it came out negative, is this most likely because I took it the day after it was unprotected? I had my period about 2-3 weeks ago, could that possibly up my risk?, and when does implantation begin if I am pregnant?
Well, I can't give you all the technical details such as fetus implantation, however, I will try to help.
The most accurate time to take a pregnancy test if you are a teen is if you are 2 weeks late on your next due period. This is because A) teen's menstrual cycles are not likely regulated, B) you have to allow time for enough progesterone to be present in your urine for an accurate test result.
If you are an adult or have a regulated cycle, 1 week late is a sufficient amount of time.
You don't want to test too early, because a false negative result is far, far more likely than a false positive.
If, by chance, you are pregnant, then vaginal bleeding is NOT normal. The only time a pregnant woman would possibly have 'normal' spotty bleeding is after cervical checks, or any other vaginal exams, from what I was told during my pregnancy.
I would say there is a possibility that he tore you, causing the bleeding.
I can't rule out the possibility of pregnancy, considering it was unprotected sex.
There is a possibility that you are starting your period early. I assume you are a teen with the above mentioned irregular cycle.
Considering you have had bleeding for 3 days, I think it would be wise to call your doctor or OB/GYN and talk to them about it. They may suggest you go in for a pelvic exam, but the nurse may be able to answer your questions over the phone. You never know until you call.
ygs-29/f
ok i want to dye my hair red with some bleach blonde panels in it.
sort of like this:
http://tinypic.com/view.php?pic=4u22i4x
i have the hair dye and i have the bleaching kit. from what ive heard from people is that you do an all over color first then on top of it you can put in the bleach. but wouldnt the bleaching dye stuff mix with the hair dye making it orange? i really dont want that to happen because school pics are in 2 days.
if you know how to do this please give me any tips you can. and i dont have the money to go to a salon so that isnt an option.
thankyou
Yes, you may very well run into the problem of the bleached hair turning orange. Why? Red tints are the hardest to remove from your hair.
After you dye your hair red, be sure to do a strand test before you put the bleach in your hair. From this, you can see exactly what it will do to your hair, and how long you have to leave it in to get the blonde. (The instructions with your kit will explain to you how to go about mixing small amounts of bleach for the strand test.)
I strongly suggest you DO NOT go over the maximum suggested time on the bleach. Bleach is extremely damaging to your hair.
ygs-29/f