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advice
15/f
[kind of long. but i really need help]
there's this girl that i'm friends with. we used to be best friends, but lately our relationship has been kind of strained. she's just been so out of control the past 2 weeks that i have no idea how to handle it. we were basically the same two weeks ago.
we're both 15 going on 16, and we had never been drunk, or done anything illegal, or had boyfriends, or h/u'd with anyone. well it started when she went to this persons sweet 16 and got drunk at an afterparty. at first i was like whatever. everyone gets drunk as a teen, no big deal. then last friday she told me she smoked cigarettes, something we swore to eachother we would never EVER do. i was in a different state this week visiting relatives and while i was gone she threw a wild house party and did weed and got completely drunk and h/u'd with 4 guys and got fingered. and she may have had sex but she doesn't even remember. I feel like she's changing too fast and there's nothing i can do about it. and even though i wasn't even in the same state as her when this party happened, i somehow feel responsible. like i let her down in a way. like i was the reason she started hanging out with these kind of people because i had been a bit too clingy and pushed her away and made her want to rebel against everyone. she doesn't understand that she can get in serious trouble for what she did, if anyone ever finds out. and the worst part is, i don't think she even feels bad about it. she'd wanted to get drunk and high and make out with guys so bad. she told me this. and it seems like she's kind of happy about it and i just don't know what to do to make her understand how worried i am about her and how dangerous this kind of behavior really is without sounding too motherly and like a loser.
any advice is appreciated.
Well, you're probably right. In some ways, your friend probably IS happy about what she's doing. For one thing, doing something wrong and getting away with it is kind of exciting. She may really be enjoying the thrill of "living dangerously." Also, the approval and acceptance of the people she's partying with might be filling some need for her. If she has any self-esteem issues, it would be very important for her to be liked and accepted by these people (who probably ARE really fun and nice people, even though they do bad things). Same thing with the hook-ups... it's not only exciting, but it makes her feel attractive and desirable... "Wow, all these guys think I'm hot enough to hook up with!"
So the partying and hooking up is offering a lot of things to make her feel good. And it will be pretty dang hard to convince her to give that all up.
But deep down, I'll bet she also feels pretty bad about it. Certainly she knows it's bad for her; that it could get her in trouble; that she could get a bad reputation. And whether she knows it yet or not, she'll eventually figure out that these guys who are hooking up with her are just using her.
So what can you do? Just keep being her friend. Let her know that you worry about what she's doing... that she might get in trouble, or get hurt, or get a bad reputation. Let her know that she doesn't need those things in order to have fun, have friends, or get a boyfriend.
And just expect that she won't want to hear it. She may tell herself (and you) that you're just jealous of her new friendships and lifestyle. But deep down she will know you're right. And if you continue to be there for her, no matter what she's done, hopefully your support will be enough to help her give that stuff up.
Good luck!
you know how there are age limits for different movies? well, if a kid is in a movie, and they are either under the rated R limit or under the PG-13 limit, do they still get to go into the theatre to see it at the premiere?
Any child can see a PG-13 or R rated movie if they are accompanied by an adult. So yes, kids who acted in the movies can go watch the premiere, if their parents let them. Sometimes the parents do, but sometimes they don't!
what does a Eurika mean?
Like give me a sentence in it and why you would say it and when..
-_- i was just thinking about it..
"Eureka" is a greek word that means "I have found it." People use it as an exclamation when they find or discover something. Gold miners would yell it when they struck gold. Some examples of when you might say it:
When you hit the jackpot on the slot machine
When you find the earring you thought you'd lost
When you put your hand in your pocket and find a $20 bill
When you go to a party and there's tons of hot guys there
Eureka! =]
My dog is throwing up blood as well as pooping it. This only started happening a week ago and has only happened twice within a week apart. She has a really weak stomach and throws up alot but never blood. She is an inside dog and only eats dog food the same as always. I dont want to take her to the vet because everytime I do that it costs a ton of money and last time I mentioned it they said it was just a weak stomach and they would put her on meds, I really dont want her on any meds for the rest of her life She is only 7 years of age and healthy otherwise. Is there any thing I can do or should I just break down and take her to the vet because it has been blood????
Take her to the vet... like right now! It could be very serious.
ok my birthday is in 2 days and i am really excited about it. So tonight my 2 friends and i are hanging out. they said it will be a little party.just a little get together. but i was telling my one friend H that i was going to wear a pin that said birthday girl on it just to be cute. and she said that would be bragging. i said no it won't because everyone has a birthday and i am happy about mine. and my other friend S had a crown on when it was her birthday and it was 1 day before. and H didn't get mad at that.now she is mad at me and i don't want to go now. Do you really think i was bragging? and how can i tell her that it is not bragging? i need help and fast!
Well, I think your friend used the wrong word for what she was trying to say. Wearing the pin isn't "bragging"... but it might seem (to her) that you're wearing it to get attention. And of course, wearing the pin WILL get you attention... but there's nothing wrong with that. It's your birthday!! Everyone deserves to feel special on their birthday!
It sounds to me like your friend is a little jealous of you. Maybe she feels like you always get more attention than she does. Don't let her get to you. That's her problem, and she'll need to get over it. If you want to wear the pin, go ahead! Have fun! And Happy Birthday!
what color matches with red?
Red works with a lot of colors. It depends on what look you're going for:
Red and Black = bold and sexy
Red and White = cheery and fun
Red and Tan/Beige = sophisticated
Red and Khaki = casual, outdoorsy/safari look
Red and Navy = preppy, conservative
In my opinion, these combinations aren't as great, although I'm sure they could work in certain situations:
Red and Green = too Christmasy
Red and Yellow = too McDonaldsy
Red and Purple = too Old Lady-ish
Why is it that some fellow advicenators tell young girls and boys it is okay to have sex or do other sexual acts "if they feel that they are ready" when they know that it is wrong. I believe they are just looking to get good ratings, do you agree? I'd much rather tell them the truth, that they are TOO YOUNG and have NO IDEA of potential consequences BESIDES pregnancy and get a lower rating than tell them it's okay. Am I the only one?
I suppose this can be seen as purely subjective, but is there anyone out there at or about my age (20) who thinks it's ok for 12 year olds to go around having oral sex and/or intercourse?
No, I doubt there are many people here who think it's okay for young teens to be doing that stuff. Most of us probably think they AREN'T ready for it, even if they think they are. But I don't think people say "it's okay if you think you're ready" just to get good ratings. I think they say it because they're afraid of sounding judgemental.
We've all had it drilled into our heads for so long that we should be accepting of everyone; that we shouldn't judge anyone or try to force our beliefs on others. We've been taught since Kindergarten that just because someone has different beliefs, it doesn't mean they're wrong. And that's a good thing, to some extent. But unfortunately, the idea has become so ingrained in our society that people are afraid to say what they really think about anything, for fear of offending someone. And if we DO actually give our honest opinion, we feel we have to add a disclaimer: "Well, I think it's wrong... but if YOU think it's right, then it's okay."
Add to that our paranoia about harming a kid's self-esteem. We certainly can't tell them they're doing something wrong or bad or stupid, because it might make them feel bad about themselves!
Well, sometimes it's a GOOD thing to feel bad about yourself... or at least about what you've done. That's how you learn not to make stupid mistakes that will hurt you or others. But if there's no fear of being judged or looked down on or shunned for doing something wrong, what's to stop people from doing it? If no one says it's wrong, then it must be okay. And that's a real shame. Because some things ARE wrong, no matter how you look at it... and a 12 year old giving a blow job is one of them. But if no one has the guts to come out and say it, then of course kids will do it and think it's okay.
Wow, that was a lot longer than I intended!
does my bf really love me
Yes. If he tells you he loves you, and acts like he does, then there's no reason to think he doesn't.
okay so for some reason my tampons hurt when i pull them out...is this normal. and this is the first period that i've actually used a tampon
Yes, if the tampon isn't totally wet, the dry parts can stick to the skin inside your vagina, and then it hurts when you pull it out. Try leaving it in a little longer and give it a chance to get thoroughly soaked; then it will slide right out easily. Don't leave it in TOO long, of course (no longer than 6 hours). During times when your period is very light and doesn't fill up a tampon in 4-6 hours, just use a thin pad or panty liner if you can get away with it.
:) helloo!
How much would an average dollhouse equipped with items cost, roughly? Or house minus the items?
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v180/putingtikbalang/Trial%20pics/Sony%20Ericsson%20K800i/dollhouse%20cupboard/DSC00089.jpg
Well, here's a website with quite a few different dollhouses: http://www.dollhousesgalore.com/
As you can see, they range from about $50 to over $500, depending on the size and details.
To actually furnish a dollhouse can cost way more than the dollhouse itself. Besides the furniture, you can buy wallpaper, carpeting, real electric lights that work, pictures and other decorative items... anything you can imagine! That's why most people who have dollhouses consider it an ongoing hobby... they buy a few pieces at a time, or completely decorate one room before moving on to the next. It might take years to get the whole thing the way you want it... but I think it's more fun that way, because you always have something to look forward to with it. And once it's finished, you can always go back and redecorate, just like a real house! =]
Im 15 and havnt had a relationship...out of my own choice..i decided when i go out with a boy i want to make sure i know it will lead somewhere and that i have to truly like him..not just a 2 week stupid relationship. But now im getting to a point where im past waiting for boys...genuine boys. You can never find them where i live. They're all into this gansta r and b rubbish. I need a boy who accepts me as their equal and loves everything about me and dosnt want anything sexual. How long till i find someone like that?I want love...whether im young or not and im tired of waiting. My best friend has been hurt so many times and its just proved to us both noone is genuine and cares about the girls heart. Please can someone give me some help..why arent there boys like that ?
Well, somewhere out there, there IS a boy who is going to love and respect you and be absolutely crazy about you. But you won't find him until you start giving guys a chance. And he WON'T be perfect... there's just no such thing. Every guy has certain faults; and that's what dating is all about. It gives you a chance to figure out what kind of faults you can live with, and what kind you can't. When you find a guy whose good qualities outweigh the bad, then you're in good shape! You'll never find a perfect guy... but you will find one who's perfect for YOU!
Another thing. You say you want a guy who doesn't want anything sexual. By that, I'm guessing you mean a guy who doesn't ONLY want something sexual. Because if you're looking for a guy who doesn't want ANYTHING sexual, then you're looking for a friend, not a boyfriend. All guys want something sexual... that's the way God made 'em. And if a guy really loves you and feels some attraction and affection for you, of course he's going to want to be close; to hug and kiss and make out, etc. Of course, if he really loves and respects you, he won't force you to do things you aren't willing to do; he'll be willing to wait until you're ready (whether that's a few weeks, months, years, or until you're married). But if he truly has romantic feelings for you, he's definitely going to WANT to do those things. If he doesn't, then it's just a friendship, not a relationship.
But like I said... there's a guy out there for you somewhere, and I can promise you, you WILL find him! But you don't want to pass him over because he has a couple faults. So give the guys a chance, and you may be surprised by what you find! =]
How many stamps would you need to put on a regular sized envelope that's being delivered to Chicago? Oh, and how long exactly does it take to be delivered from Pittsburgh to Chicago, and vice versa? Thanks!
You only need one 41-cent stamp to mail a regular sized envelope anywhere in the United States. That is, if you mail it before May 12. On May 12, the price of stamps will be going up to 42 cents. If you still have some 41 cent stamps left over, you can still use them, but you'll need to buy some 1 cent stamps to go along with them. =]
what is the definition of by polar
The word is actually Bipolar. "Bi" meaning two; and "polar" meaning opposite ends or extremes (like the north and south pole). Together, the word means "two opposite extremes." And that's what Bipolar disorder is; when someone goes back and forth from being extremely happy, energetic, and excited, to being extremely sad, depressed and lethargic (lacking energy). It's sometimes called "manic-depressive."
Okay, now most people who are going to read this, i dont really know how to word what im saying, but hopefully you'll be able to understand my situation.
now my problem is i feel weird around my parents, when im getting closer and closer with the boyfriend that i have, that they dont know about.
let me fill you in about my relationships with my parents & boyfriend. okay with my parents- im closer with my dad. hes really cool, like he's protective and cautious, but he knows when he needs to just lay off. he also is really smart, and helps me with alot of sticky situations. and my mom, im usually in that "mom leave me alone, im not in the mood. go away" phase, but shes pretty cool. but she can also be a little to noisy, and protective.
& my boyfriend, he really likes me. more then i like him. which is okay, i guess. hes extremely sweet, and respectable.
okay, back to my problem.
i feel kind of weird when we talk about our feelings for each other, like im kind of betraying my parents. i love my parents, but for some reason i just do not want to tell them i have a boyfriend. its just weird. and i do not want to tell them. so whenever my boyfriend and i get closer and closer, i just get a weird feeling like i shouldnt be with him. i dont know why i get that feeling, so i was hoping you could tell me what you think. i need some really good advice here, i dont know what to do.
i feel weird when it comes to boyfriends-family.
help?!
thank you guys
Well, it sounds like you're feeling guilty about having a boyfriend and keeping it from your parents. By not telling them the truth, it feels like you're lying to them. So when you're with him, you feel like you're betraying them. And I think it's pretty normal that you'd feel that way.
What would happen if you DID tell them about your boyfriend? Would they be mad, or make you break up with him? If you aren't sure, maybe you could ask them for their feelings about you dating, without actually telling them you have a boyfriend. If they're against the idea, perhaps you can ease them into it, by inviting him over with a group of friends and letting them get to know him a bit.
But whatever happens, you shouldn't feel guilty about your feelings for your boyfriend, or your personal, private conversations with him. That is something special for the two of you to share, and your parents don't have to be a part of that. It might seem weird, especially if you're used to telling your parents everything, like you did when you were little. But as you grow up, there will be certain parts of your life that are yours alone, and it's okay to keep them to yourself. That includes your feelings and private conversations with your boyfriend. Think about it... I'm sure there are certain things your parents say and do together that they don't share with you or anyone else. That's natural. And the same goes for you. You can choose to tell your parents anything you'd like, but you don't have to tell them everything that goes on in your relationships.
F/14
One of my best freinds is a boy, and he came over like twice or three times. Today we wanted to go to a football game and my parents say "I dont think this relationship you two are sharing will work out" and im standing there with my mouth hung open and they dont believe me that we are JUST FREINDS. They wont let us hang out cause they think were going out, and my parents are really over protective. I tell them that were just friends and they say "A boy and a girl cant be 'best freinds'"
Thats definatley not true and i dont want to bring it up again, but i definatley wanna hang out more with him cause well . . . WERE FREINDS!
Im totally lost and embarrassed, i need a way to let them know that there is no way were ever gunna go out!
Were like brother and sister!
HELP!
Well, first let me say that I'm totally on your side with this. I've had lots of guy friends who I like hanging out with because, well, they're just fun to hang out with! But let's take a look at it from your parent's viewpoint, because it always helps to understand where they're coming from when you're trying to present a good arguement.
For one thing, a lot of people DO think it's impossible for a girl and a guy to be "just good friends." Not from the girl's side... girls always have guys they consider just friends and nothing more. But from the guy's side... lots of people believe that guys are always thinking of "one thing", and that somewhere in their mind, they're always hoping that a friendship might lead to something more. Your parents might totally believe that YOU have only friendship in mind, but they may worry that your guy friend has other motives... and that you might eventually give in to that.
Another thing they might worry about is appearences. If you're always hanging out with this guy, especially if it's just the two of you, it may appear to other people that you're going out (even if you aren't). And if your parents are against you dating right now, they may worry what other people will think. They might imagine people saying, "Oh, I see they're letting her date now." Or even, "Oh my goodness! I can't believe they're letting her spend so much time with that boy! What scandal!"
So that may be what you're up against. The solution? Well, if you really like spending time with your friend, you may have to settle for hanging around him in a group. If there are other girls and guys along with you, it won't look like it's just you two together. You could also try getting HIS parents involved... next time the two of you want to do something, have his parents call your parents. That might give it a more innocent "play date" kind of feel, and your parents might be more comfortable with it.
Good luck!
i really want a treadmill and i was gonna buy one from Walmart for like 300 with my own money but my dads like oh you cant buy one blah blah blah.
i want to know which ones better, an elliptical or a treadmill.
i only have like 300 dollars to spend on one. and i wanted this treadmill from walmart, but my dads being a party pooper and wont let me. http://www.walmart.com/catalog/product.do?product_id=6561182
and i don't know if ellipticals are good. so which one will tone my abs and legs/butt better an elliptical or treadmill?
Ellipticals and treadmills are both great... if you use them on a regular basis. And that may be what your dad is concerned about. Most people who buy exercise equipment are all gung-ho about it for a couple weeks... and then the thing sits there gathering dust and taking up space. Your dad may not want you to waste your money on something that will end up not being used.
One alternative is to look in the want ads for a used one, which will be a lot cheaper. You'll find tons of them, and a lot of them will be practically brand new. If it's not real expensive, your dad may go for that.
If buying a new one is your only option, then find a way to convince your dad that you're serious about using one. Find a gym that has one and go there every day. Your dad will see that you're really dedicated to it (not to mention, he'll probably get tired of driving you to the gym), and he may give in and let you buy your own.
Good luck! =]
okay so this guy i've been talking to since like the beggining of february has a girlfriend.
and they've been dating for like 2 years and last night i sent him a picture.
it wasn't revealing or anything but it was kinda..
ya okay so then he kept trying to get me to send him another and i can't.
i can't just be the one to break up a couple of 2 years and i dont really care if he ever talks to me again but what should i do if he asks me again??
b/c the last time i said no and reminded him he has a girlfriend..but idk.
thank you
Good for you... I'm glad you feel that way. Because I'm sure you know how bad you'd feel if someone was sending YOUR boyfriend pictures. It's just not right, and it's good that you've realized that.
If he asks you again, just tell him the same thing. Tell him you're sorry you sent him that one in the first place... that it was a mistake, and you were wrong to do it, because he has a girlfriend. And don't let him give you the old "but I'm gonna break up with her" routine. That's a bunch of BS that guys use to keep stringing you along while they have their cake and eat it too. If he actually does break up with her, then fine... he's fair game. But as long as he's still taken, then he's off limits. And not just for his girlfriend's sake, but for yours as well.
OMGGGGG please please please help me!
i had a bad accident today and one of my bottom teeth broke! i went to the dentist and all and he said we have to wait until wednesday for the gums to heal before we replace it!! please help me! i need a way to hide until then my family are being so mean and nonsupporting... i need a way to disguise it until then because i don't my friends to see me like this!
ANYTHING! please anything that i could find at home and use to disguise the missing tooth its on the side near the front two teeth at the bottom!
Well, you could keep some white gum in your mouth and sort of smoosh it over the tooth... but really, anything you put on there is gonna be noticable. And people will be like, why do you have that on your tooth? And then you'll have to explain it, and then they'll want to see it.
I think you should just relax and don't let it bother you. It's really not as big a deal as you think. It's just a tooth, and it's only a couple days. I've seen people come to school with a lot worse... black eyes, broken noses, stitches, etc. Nobody will think badly of you or make fun of you. It was an accident, so they'll feel sorry for you! Well, okay, I could see maybe some doofy guys teasing you, but just in a flirty sort of way. And it might be kind of fun to get a little attention! So don't let it bother you. It's really going to be okay!
Okay,
All my friends complain when they get cramps. I never get cramps and ive been on my period for 2 years. Is this normal? My friends say im lucky, but is something wrong?
thanks alot
No, there's nothing wrong with you. I've never had cramps, either, and I've had my period for a lot longer than 2 years. Just be happy that you don't get them! :)
15/f sophmore.
pep rally
so i'm at school and my vie principle wanted me any my 3 other friends to do this relay thing. And each person had to spin around on a bat 10 times around...so after i spun around the bat 10 times..i was REALLY dizzy. and i fell...but i got up and ran across the gym.
so my question is i know on monday people are going to make fun of me..or make jokes about this situation. So how do i act like i don't care ?!!!..what would you do in my situation?!!
please give me all of the advice you can think of.
You want people to be laughing WITH you, not AT you, right? And they can't laugh with you if you aren't laughing too. So go ahead and laugh it off! Just say, "Omg that was so embarrassing!" or "Yeah, I felt so stupid!"... and laugh about it and then move on to another subject. That will let people know that you're a good sport and that it doesn't bother you.
And trust me... even though people might tease you and joke about it with you, I can promise you that no one will be talking about it behind your back or thinking that you were clumsy or dorky for falling. The whole point of the spinning thing was to get you all dizzy so you'd do something funny. So you were a good sport to go through with it and provide everyone with some entertainment. People will respect you for that, not look down on you for it. So don't worry!!