about

I'm Jack/Jamie.

I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.

I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.


my forum
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Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!




--Jack

advice

Fourteen Female.
Okay so I hadn't seen Benamin since Friday and he wanted to see me, and my parents were out and still aren't home so I was like come over it'll be fun.
Well we were ust hanging out, like usual. Were friends, that yeh a little bennifits but it's just fun [[and no nothing below the belt.]]
Well Friday night I got Breaking Dawn-- an amazing book and we weren't doing much so I started reading it while sitting in the recliner chair. So he started messing with me and was like "Your such a nerd- only you would read with ME in the room." Which is true, a lot of girls in my school like him.. and like obsess.. =X
so he climbed on me, and tried taking the book away and he had my legs pinned with his knees and I dont know how it happened. He leaned and started kissing my neck.. and stuff. Kind of groping\grinding me. This is the furthest this has ever gone. We do kiss but its just joking. or just to me.. And a lot of people have been telling me to date Ben but he's just a friend but he's amazing and I was hoping to feel something for him but I couldn't.
So I let things get out of hand, letting it happen when all of sudden he jumped off me and ran for the bathroom. To say the least I was scared i did something wrong... hurt him. Or or something.
ten minutes later.. when he came out he was so red. And I didnt know why. He just started apoligising. "Katie, Im so so so sorry. I can't believe that happened. It wont happen again.. I swear." Just rambaling. And I was like What happened? he looked at me like I was on crack and I sorta wish he never told me. He was like. "Katie... I just got.. hard on you."
----MEH!
He left very sortly after that and I've tried talking to him because his friend Ralph called and was like duude.. you need to talk to him I swear he's gunna get a vasectame he's so embarressed.
=X I feel horrible. I could have stopped it before that happened and Ive been trying to talk to him. To explain it's not that big of a deal.. and he wont listen.
Is it normal for boys my age to.. get hard that easy? I don't know what these means. I mean im friends with him, close but. Ahh. I don't want Ralph making fun either... Can you help getting hard? I donno.. how can I make this right?

Oh dear. The trials and tribulations of the teenage years.

"Getting hard" or in other words, getting an erection, especially in the teenage years is very hard to control. Even with the slightest touch or slightest smell, it can just happen.

Try calling him or talking to him one more time and tell him that it's ALRIGHT. He's just a normal teenager. If it really didn't bother you, TELL HIM. Yes, you may have tried, but maybe you didn't say EXACTLY what was needed to be said.

Tell him that you would never hate him or think less of him for something like that, which he cannot easily control.

--Jack
(16/m)

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Ok so I am suicidal and have been for a while now. I go around reading about other people and everything to gain as much knowledge as possible. I notice that a lot of times people say it's not worth it and dumb. Well try being in our shoes once then tell someone that. It's not so easy as you make it seem. You may actually hurt somone even more by yelling at them. But anywho....

I am going back down hill wanting to die. I am at my wits end with life and dealing with people from this world that are ignorrant and mean to those in need of help. I have gotten help and am on pills yet I still want to die. Why is life worth so much to people? I am so confused at this point and wanting to perish. I just want to be happy without things always going to shit instantly and getting worse everyday. I would love to find somewhere I fit in. If anyone knows where I would fit in besides with the people in the mental Hospital let me know.

I don't know how much help this will be, but it's a discussion in someone's forum on here that may let you know that you aren't alone:

http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutmetopic.php?t=840&userboard_id=50630

--Jack
(16/m)

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My boyfriend fingered me today for the 2nd time.. it felt soo good compared to the first time and didnt hurt as much except this time i started bleeding.. is it because he "popped my cherry"?

To be frank, that is a possibility.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I am a 32-34 B cup bra.
As you can tell, boys sorry this question probably isn't for you, but thanks anyway (:

Is there any way to make your boobs bigger by just massaging them, or doing things during sex, or even eating something?
if anything of this sort has worked on you, please tell (:
thanks so much!

I know I'm a guy, but there aren't any tricks to get your boobs bigger unless you have plastic surgery.

Any person or website telling you otherwise is lying.

If you're still 13-15, they will likely grow.

--Jack
(16/m)

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How do you know if your order has shipped on ebay? I ordered a guitar on Thursday and I want it so badly.

http://forums.whirlpool.net.au/forum-replies-archive.cfm/945781.html

The general consensus is that the only way to know is to ask the seller through email.

Here was an idea:

if it's being posted using registered post or express post, ask the seller for a tracking number. and you call up aust post to find out.

If the seller use regular post, then you have to confront the seller....

also check, whether the seller has marked the item is posted on ebay.



--Jack
(16/m)

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ok, well..
i have 34a's and they're always sore.
and when i lay on them they hurt.
they're hard and reaalllly tender..
WHATS WRONG?!?!?!

My best guess is just that they are growing because you are only a teenager, after all.

But if it's starting to worry you, I would advise that you see a doctor, because they are ones to ask about diagnoses, not Advicenators ;].

--Jack
(16/m)

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With my guy friend jaymes i really like him like alot , i've liked him the whole school year , and i'm not sure he likes me now but i know he used to . i'm scard to ask him out and he says not and it will then feel akward cause i see him alot helives two house away from mine but i LIKE hime soo much

This answer of my friend Laura's might help you out a bit:

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=543173

Well, there are 2 major options you can go about to solve this problem:


1. Be blunt about it.
2. Be shy about it.


I highly suggest being blunt about it, and either asking him if he's into you too, or simply asking him out yourself. Guys like when girls show confidence, and there's no better way to show you're confident than walking up to a guy and asking him out!


Or, you can go the other route and be shy about it, possibly doing nothing to show him you're interested in him. Sometimes, people who use this method drop subtle hints such as smiling [which is common in girls and doesn't always show you're into a guy] or having a friend ask if he's into you [this only shows that you're too shy to do it yourself]. This option is really kind of stupid, and is used all too much...


As I always say:
Life is WAY too short to not take chances and risks once in a while. Why sit around wondering what could've been, what would've been and what should've been, when you can answer all of those questions and then some by being honest and telling a boy how you really feel about him?


--Jack
(16/m)

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so this isn't a advice question. But I just need to know about how long of a drive is it from peterborough nh to strafford nh?

http://www.mapquest.com/maps?1c=Peterborough&1s=NH&2c=Strafford&2s=NH

From there:

Total Estimated Time: 1 hour 40 minutes
Total Estimated Distance: 73.52 miles

--Jack
(16/m)

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my borther and i fight constantly and we wont sto pwe can barly wven be in the same room like i love him to deathbut you know icant stand him and his jerkish ways , when his around his friends and our borthers he gets ten times worse like i could almost kill myself becauseof some of hte things he says when i'm home with him by my self and i dont do wut he wants he will threatn me with a knife to slit my throat and it's harsh ..

Before I read that he threatens you, I was going to say just try to talk to him and tell him that it upsets you that he's not nice to you. Maybe you two could come up with some sort of compromise every time you fight about something?

But when I read that he threatens you, I instantly thought you need to tell your parents about what he's doing. That is out of control and SO uncalled for. Threats are serious business, and if your parents don't take action, tell a friend's parents or even call the police. You shouldn't feel like you can't live in your own house without getting threats from a sibling.

--Jack
(16/m)

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well my best friend sara moveda way this summer and it feels really weird not having someone to tlak to and hang out with 24-7 i really miss herr i cry every night wishing she still lived by me and well she now lives like 15 hours away and it's really hard

There are plenty of ways to still keep contact with your friend. You know, I have a best friend who lives 5 hours away, but we still keep contact with each other.

Here are some ways you can do that:

1. Talking over the phone
2. Instant Messaging
3. Email
4. Texting
5. MySpace
6. Facebook
7. Letters
8. Web Cam

And there are so many other ways. I know having a friend far away can be hard, but you just have to make an effort to continue talking to them =].

--Jack
(16/m)

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haha, my first day was crazy, but i still need help with being more talkitive. i mean i talk to people when they talk to me, but i dont really know what to say to start a conversation. oh and im not a very good conversationalist, because i use to not talk at all at school for like 4 years, now im going into junior year, i should be able to conversate. its really hard for me because i feel so cut off from the world, and i have social anxiety but i take medicine for that. yeh, so when i talk, i feel awkard. and people usually comment on my voice, they usually say oh you talk so quiet. but thats because im still not comfortable to be outgoing, but i am working on it, i dont know what im reallly asking. just please help. im thinking about planning what im going to say tomarrow at school and coming up with funny stuff to say, haha.. any jokes? also if you can tell how most girls my age think, so i would have a clue what to say. haha, like i said, im so cut off from the world. and what kind of atitude should i have?. ahh , ihad one more little question but i forgot haha.

Here's some tips on how to start a conversation. I would paste them out, but it's too long. You can pick and choose a few suggestions.

Just relax:

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=545090

--Jack
(16/m)

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About a month ago my best guy friend, who I've dated twice, convinced me to have a very perverted conversation. I hate being perverted and I don't like acting like it, so now I am guilty and I hate myself. I still love him though but I'm afraid he will want to have other conversations like the last one. What should I do? I don't know how to say "no" if he asks me again.

Hmm, if you don't want to have these conversations, then just flat out tell him. He cannot and should not make you do things you do not want to do.

Don't feel guilty for something he forced you to do. Yes, you had free will, but you probably didn't know. Just don't think about it anymore.

Next time he asks, the best way to say no is to just say "No, I don't want to."

Trying to come up with elaborate excuses will not work. Just flat out tell him what you want and don't want.

--Jack
(16/m)

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Lately, my skin has been breaking out horribly. The soap I'm currently using isn't working at all, so I'm going to try something new this week.

Does anybody have any product recommendations other than Proactiv?

Product name and a price range would be super helpful. Thanks!

Hmm I don't have specific products, but here's some info you may find useful:

I know this sounds weird, odd, strange, etc., but what I'm about to say to you ACTUALLY works:

Get some lemon juice. You got the lemon juice? Alright- now take the lemon juice- and take a Q-tip and dab some lemon juice onto your zit with the lemon juice. Just a thin layer- not the whole bottle, silly! =D

Alright- so doing this at night is the best thing to do- it will really reduce the size and shape of the zit- and you won't know it was there in a few days.

Make sure not to touch it with your fingers after you put on the lemon juice- the oils from your fingers will stop the effect.

Relax- everyone gets zits- so you're only normal =D.

And here's a forum discussion from one of my friends on here that talks a lot about acne:

http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutmetopic.php?t=368&userboard_id=35415

--Jack
(16/m)

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How do you please your self with just your fingers?

http://sexuality.about.com/od/anatomyresponse/ht/masturbatewomen.htm

We cannot tell you but we can give you links.

Do what makes you comfortable.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I recently found out that my ex-boyfriend is gay. I'm not saying this is a bad thing at all. I could care less what sexual preference people have. I have three lesbian friends and it doesn't bother me. It's just that when I met my ex, he wasn't gay. When I met my lesbian friends, they'd already come out and everything. It's just such a shock to me. It just feels weird. He only just realized that he was gay a few months ago, and he came out last week. (We broke up in March, and he realized this apparently in the beginning of May.)
I'm not prejudiced at all against gay people, it's just a weird feeling that someone I was dating turned out to be gay. There's nothing wrong with that as a person, just the idea is sort of uncomfortable you know?
Him and I are still friends and everything...it wasn't a messy break-up. I don't have a problem being around him even though he's gay, in fact it makes things a little easier. Just the idea is hard to get used to.
-15/f

It will definitely take time to get used to, but since you two are still pretty good friends and it wasn't a nasty break up [good for you xD], it will probably be even more easy to get used to it.

If you hang out with him a lot, it will also take less time.

And since he came out to you, well then he obviously feels comfortable around you and that should also make it easier to get used to it.

Basically what I'm saying is it will take time, but it will happen if you're patient =].

--Jack
(16/m)

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15/f

a guy asked me out and we are making plans to hang out this weekend. were going to watch a movie together at a mall. this is the first time im ever going on a date with a guy and i really need some pointers and tips on what to say, do, act etc. please help! im really nervous!!

and i also asked my bff to come with me (shes bringing her boyfriend) because my parents wont let me go out unless i bring a friend with.

HELP IM FREAKING OUT HERE!!

Guys like girls who don't go out of their way to impress them. So if you just be yourself and relax, the guy will definitely notice and he'll likely be more attracted to you since you're being yourself.

Here's how to start conversations if that is what you're worried about:

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=545090

Here's some flirting tips if that's something else you're worried about:

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=543909

And here's some other things guys like in a girl:

Guys like girls who are confident in themselves.

Guys like girls who are individuals without being too weird.

Guys like girls who are smart.

Guys like girls who are well-rounded.

Guys like girls who are willing to carry on a conversation.

Basically it differs for every guy, but generally, that's what guys think.


I myself like any type of girl. I honestly don't judge looks as much as I do personality. If a girl is absolutely stunningly beautiful, but she's a bitch- why would I like her? What would our relationship be? What would we talk about? Her latest hair extensions? Yeah- that would be REALLY nice *Sarcasm: Party of one!*...
If a girl has a really nice personality- and she's really outgoing and sweet and nice and smart- and she's not necessarily the best looking girl- but she's not super unattractive- then I'll most likely want to date her over the beautiful bitch.


--Jack
(16/m)

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can a guy only get a girl pregnant when he is hard? cause like can you both get naked and play around and finger eachother without the guy getting you pregnant even if his penis is around you but not in the vagina? i want to be safe :]
thanks.
f/15

Whether he is "hard" or not, if sperm comes out, and it gets anywhere near your vagina, you risk pregnancy.

If you want to be safe, use protection, even if you're not having sexual intercourse.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I got a Facebook like three or four months ago just to look at other ppl's profiles, but I did put my full name in. I don't have a picture or anything on it and I haven't added any friends, however.

I just learned that on Facebook, it is announced to everyone in your school's network that you have joined. But as of right now, I have only one friend request! And it's from my best friend! I mean, I haven't tried to add anyone, and I haven't even added my BFF but that's because I don't want a Facebook anyway, but... I'm feeling kind of bad because nobody has even bothered to add me on Facebook even though they knew I had joined the network like 3 months ago. Should I feel bad? Other people I know have Facebooks and I would assume that they would want to add me...?

Sorry if that was poorly described.

To be honest, since I get so many notifications, I don't ever really notice those, and in fact, I don't believe I've ever gotten a notification about someone joining my school's network, especially since there are well over 2,000 people in mine by now.

And since you don't have a picture of yourself and you don't have your full name, it's kind of hard for people to know who you are. They may be able to guess, but with everything else going on via Facebook, it's not really worth the effort.

Like someone else said, when you find someone you know, add them. It's really as simple as that. Maybe, if you're comfortable with doing so, put a picture of you up, and I'm sure you'll start to get at least a few friend requests.

--Jack
(16/m)

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I am WAY to shy! I am starting highschool this year, in 2 weeks and I REALLY want to make some new friends. I mean, I guess I have a lot of friends but I'm finding it more and more difficult to act like myself around them. Even my best friend in the world can't entertain me. I can't hold up a conversation at ALL so I usually find myself complaining about something as a sort of "default conversation topic", which I KNOW people find complaining annoying but it's better to be talking about something than not be talking at all right?? I just don't know how to do this. I'd like to have a little group of best friends that all like each other and then a larger group of friends to hang with and stuff. Most of my friends don't really like each other, unfortunately :( there's also this little group of friends I know that are really cool and we have a lot in common but i'm not sure how I would approach them...I just don't know. PLEASE help me!!!

If you want to know how to start a conversation with someone or a group of people, there's a lot of useful advice here:

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=545090


If you wanted to know about your first year of high school, here's something that may help you:

I was a freshman two years ago- and I have to say.. it was one of the most scary things I've EVER experienced! I was thrown in the trash can on the first day and it was horrible. Some kid even had to go to the emergency room! It was the WORST first day of school of my entire life! I almost didn't go back!

Haha- so hopefully you didn't take that seriously- because it really wasn't like that at all. I always play that trick on people who ask this question. C'mon- I gotta have a little fun! High school is NOT scary. It actually is a lot more fun. You have more freedoms than middle school and you can take REALLY awesome classes. If you have to chance to take a Speech class- DO IT! You think it will be the dumbest class ever and you'll be really bored- but you get the chance to get really good at speeches- and you'll learn really awesome things! When you get to be a Junior/Senior- take AP and Honors classes- these will impress colleges and they will want you to go to their college if you do well enough on them.

People may tell you that Freshmen year doesn't count for anything- so slacking off won't matter until you're an upperclassmen. This is wrong. Colleges will look at your cumulative GPA- and that includes your freshmen year. Don't slack off; you'll regret it later.

Just to debunk the rumor- There is NOT a "Freshmen Friday". Sure, this used to exist back in the 60s and 70s, but it doesn't anymore. Any school that actually still does it will probably end up getting sued by a bunch of parents. So most don't do it. Chances are, your high school won't do it.

Here is my list of DOs and DON'Ts:

Do:
-Do all of your homework.
-Make new friends [some old ones will naturally just fade away] and do this by just starting up simple conversations with people- and it will eventually lead to a great friendship. Ask someone you may want to get to know for a pencil in class.. that's a classic. Sit with new people at lunch.
-Ask the teacher for help if you need it.

Don't:
-Don't talk to seniors.. they most likely DON'T like you. The won't give you any respect.
-Don't wear revealing clothing- seniors will automatically hate you.

All in all- if you just be yourself- you'll be fine. If you have upperclassmen in any classes- you'll get to know them over the course of the year- and you may end up meeting some really great people. I know that some of my best friends I met at school freshmen year- and most of them were 10th grade or older. Not all seniors hate you- some will be welcoming- but just assume the worst in them, at first. After awhile- you'll know who to avoid and who to warm up to. You'll be fine. Don't worry.

--Jack
(16/m/Junior)

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One of my friends in 6th grade, when he lived in Texas, said he faked a sickness which I forget and he skipped a whole school year and was home schooled. Don't really know how true it was though, but It was a contagious sickness of some kind...

Anyway, does anyone know any sickness that can work like this? The reason why is sort of personal, but I only want to skip one year of school, and come back the next... Its sort of a long story why...

Any ideas would help. Thanks.

My friend had salmonella poisoning, but that only had her out for 1/3 of the year, and it ended up really affecting her credits and such. So I don't suggest you do that.

Plus, it's rather impossible to fake salmonella, and like Razhie said, your friend is probably lying, because usually when a 6th grader lies about something to a doctor, it fails. Doctors know what they are doing, and there's really no way he could have fooled one for over a few weeks.

If you want advice on how to overcome your personal issue, there are plenty of people on here who are more than willing to help you out. Just post a new question and you'll get at least a few answers ;].

--Jack
(16/m)

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