about

I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)

Facts about me:
*happy
*employed
*married
*large extended family
*bisexual
*advanced college degree
*no kids (yet)

advice

if you are hiv positive can u still get a belly ring and tattoo please let me know

I don't see why you wouldn't be able to. I would imagine that the people that do those things would take every precaution with everyone. In other words they will assume that anybody they work on has AIDS. You would think they would have to since a lot of people that have it don't even know themselves. If this wasn't the case they'd probably make you fill out a form or something and AIDS would probably be covered by something on that. In any case, I think that it would be respectful to tell them about it. If they don't feel comfortable doing it, it should be up to them to decide. If you're worried about the news getting around that you have AIDS, have it done in a different area where no one knows you. Good luck. :)

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I'm very afraid of storms and wind at night. I have to hand my hands over my ears to fall asleep. My heart just pounds and pounds. If the storm gets really bad, or loud for that matter, I go sleep my parents or my mom comes to sleep in my bed.
The sound of wind or thunder or rain is what scares, as well as power outages. Now that it is winter, it is a bit stormy almost every night, and it's horrible.
How can I rid myself of this terrible fear?

P.S. I am afraid right now, as it is 7:30 pm and it is windy and rainy.

See a counselor or therapist about it. A professional should be able to help you. This is something that you'll need to get over if you don't want it to affect your life. Your parents should be very supportive of it. I wish you lots of luck. :)

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i think i might be bipolar i have been researching it and i have been displaying all the classic symtoms of someone who might have the disorder i have talked to my mom about it but she won't take me seriously she thinks that i just am joking but i am not i'm scared does anyone know anywhere i can call that will just offer support that i can call without my mom knowing about it?

One of these hotlines may be able to help you.

National Institute of Mental Health
1-888-ANXIETY (1-888-269-4389)

National Mental Health Association
1-800-969-6642

Teen Helpline
1-800-400-0900

TeenLine
1-800-522-8336

Bring it up to your doctor at your next yearly physical. Talking to a nurse or counselor at your school about it will help too. Probably more than any of the hotlines will. :)

Good luck!

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My boyfriend's best friend is a girl. This girl is his ex girlfriend that he was in a relationship with years ago. She's always trying to make me look bad & has admitted that she still loves him. He claims to have no interest in her at all. I don't even bring her up ever but the jealousy is finally getting to me. He says that he can't ditch her since they've been friends for years. What am I supposed to do? I don't want to make him choose but I can't take it anymore.

What are you jealous of? Of course she likes him. He's a great guy! Tons of people probably like him right? The only reason you should be jealous of her is if he still liked her too. He doesn't. Let it go. You'll get over it with time. Good luck and be happy. He chose you over her. She's got nothing. ;)

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i have a 2 choices of laptops, but i dont know the best one can u help me choose which one is the fastest one, have a good memory and stuff not the dont judge the price, the fuction pls thanks

1st) compaq laptop
-intel pentium 4.1GHz processor
-512MB DDR RAM
-30BG hard drive
-DVD-ROM drive
-32MB ATI Mobility Radeon 7500 video
-56k modern and network card
-14.1 TFT screen
-windows XP Professional
-costs:$449.99




the 2nd) IBM laptop
-intel pentium IV 1.8GHz processor
-256MB RAM
-40GB hard drive
-DVD-ROM drive
-56K modern and network card
14.1 TFT screen
-windows XP professional
costs:$399.99

which one?

My boyfriend has a Compaq and it sucks. Anything but the Compaq! Even though it has less RAM, you'll be so much better off with the IBM.

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The last time I had sex with my boyfriend was 2 weeks ago. My period is not due for another week or so. My stomach has been feeling weird now, I feel fatter/heavier, and I just don't feel well. When is the best time to take a pregnancy test and have it accurate? Is it a week before your first missed period or something like that?

Take a pregnancy test two weeks after you had sex. So now. It doesn't matter where your period falls. You're probably just imagining feeling sick and heavier. It may even be partly from the stress you are feeling about the situation. Outward signs of pregnancy don't show up this quickly. Try not to worry about it. If you're not on birth control and didn't use a condom, please do at least one of the two next time if you don't want to get pregnant. Good luck!

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im 17 and i am very close with my 19 year old cousin. i hang out with her and her friends close to every weekend.we do drink and party etc..when she was a sr in high school i was a freshman, so i met her friend mike. a few months ago we were all at a party and mike tends to show interest in me. but he always felt bad because hes 20. i started to have feelings for mike so one day i IMed him online. he actually wanted to talk, and that made me feel good like he didnt push me away, he actually wanted to ) we talked alot every few days because hes usually busy at school. i saw him a few weeks ago and it was weird, he was acting pretty shy.so this weekend when my cousin had a party, he was all over me and we ended up making out and then we dropped him off and we kissed, he called me late night and wanted to pick me up but i said it was a bad idea because he was too drunk to drive, and he aggreed. the next day he IMed me right when he came on and wanted to hangout so i went to this other kid, tom. my cousin and her friends went to a college so i was the only girl besides two other girls and like 6 boys. he was very shy at first and it was a little awkward but then we grew to be more touchy, snuggled on the couch, madeout and he was tellin me we should go out to eat sometime. him and his friend dropped me off late night and i texted him thinking hed text back but he called to make sure i was okay and i told him id talk to him monday since he was going to the patriots football game all day/ all night and he said hed call me. like i dont want to get my hopes up but i think he might like me, even tom said he thinks he does. so what do you think? thanks and also what should i do so it doesnt seem like im like obsessed or like him this early. he also attends college like 20 minutes away. thanks

He definitely likes you. I don't think it's just a physical attration either. He said that you should go out to eat together sometime. It's pretty obvious that he wants it to be a date. I would be careful if I were you though. If you get too attached to him before a relationship begins, you'll be especially heartbroken if it doesn't work out. Don't make out with him anymore until you're dating. You can even tell him that. He'll understand and it may even be a good time for a relationship to start! Right then and there. Don't worry about seeming obsessed. Don't you want him to like and be obsessed with you? He probably wants the same thing. It looks like this is going to turn out very well for you. I'd wish you luck, but it doesn't look like you need it! :):)

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Well i weigh alot and im signed up to a gym but i don't go that often because i have aot of homework. Also i'm having some acne problems. And theres this girl i've been trying to impress latly so plz help me.

About the acne, see a Dermatologist (skin doctor). You'll be able to get perscription acne medication. It works really well.

Okay this is going to sound kind of harsh, but you need to hear it. Stop making excuses and gooooo to the gym. Life isn't that hard and you can do anything you set your mind to if you get out there and try. I'm sure you don't have 8 hours of homework every night. Budget your time. If you want to lose the weight you can. Let this girl be your motivation. Being outgoing, confident, and driven will impress her more than any silly pick up lines you can come up with. Impress her by showing her that you are willing to work hard to be better. Once you've made progress, tell her it was all for her. She'll eat it up. ;)

Be confident in yourself and your potential and just go for it. You can do it. Good luck. :)

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okay, so i feel REALLY stupid asking this, but..
everyone talks about girls having "crabs" & all.. but what exactly ARE they?? because idk. i feel stupid that i dont know, but i have to find out somehow, and i figured this would be the perfect place to ask.

ps, i didnt know what category to put this under :x

It's an STD that, like the others have said, is basically lice in your pubic hair. Here's a website if you're interested in learning a bit more. http://www.coolnurse.com/pubic_lice.htm

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I have a problem of constant worrying about getting things done. I feel as if there aren't enough hours in the day to finish all the homework teachers give us, I don't understand the lessons, then I fail the test, then it all starts over again.

I'm about to break down and cry. I get sick from worrying so much! The stress from school is killing me and my demanding parents aren't helping. What should I do?

You need to find a way to vent. You're holding all your emotions in and they just keep building up. There's enough time for everything. Take an hour each day for "me" time. Read a book, write in a journal, listen to music, go for a jog, watch some TV, anything you enjoy. If you can't take a deep breath and relax, nothing is going to get done. If you are calm and relaxed, things will get done much faster. It took me awhile to be able to do this, but I got the hang of it. At first you'll feel guilty and you'll have a hard time sitting there knowing that nothing is getting done for an hour. You'll realize though, how much it helps and it will start coming easier and easier to you. Oh, and forget your parents. Doing things for them instead of for yourself is no good. You need to take a break sometimes so just brush it off if they give you a hard time about it. Remember too, that you don't have to be perfect. Getting a 70 on a test is perfectly okay. Accept yourself for who you are, not what your parents, or even what you want yourself to be. It's ok to want to be better, but don't focus your entire life around that or you'll never be happy. Good luck. :)

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Ok so this may sound like bullshit to anyone else who hears it because i have only been going out with my boyfriend since October 25th, but i'm forreal when i say that i love him. I dont think he knows it but i want him to know it. I just dont want to say it and freak him out or anything. Its like you look at your relationship as if it could never last...you kind of just cant really see you guys breaking up. Do you know that feeling? So how do i tell him that i love him? I think hes said that he loves me before but i dont really know because he kind of said it quietly then when i asked him what he said hes like "nothing, i didnt say anything." so i have no idea what do you think?

If you love somebody, you should tell them. Your feelings can always change, it's not like telling someone that you love them means you're stuck with them forever. Don't put so much meaning into it. It sounds like your boyfriend wants to tell you the same thing, but he's afraid. He probably thinks that you don't love him yet. He may also be afraid that if he says it, he will pressure you into saying it too when you might not really feel that way. Since he has hinted at it already, there is no reason for you to hold back. Tell him you love him. It will bring you closer together and you'll be so much happier. Good luck!

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why do people put x's in there screennames does it mean something? i used to do it but i dont know why.. im just asking because theyres like TOO many x's insome girls sn like hxxcLOVER
LOVEXXXXXXME55 BUT WHY?!

Maybe there are a lot of people like you that just do it and don't really apply a meaning to it. Since it's hard to get a good sn that hasn't already been taken, adding some x's in there can make your chances better. The letter x has also been known to stand for a kiss (o is a hug). One of my sn's has an x in it which stands for the letters "cks" which make an x sound. There's a lot of reasons why someone may do it, so if you're really curious, you can just ask them and I'm sure they'd be more than happy to share!

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what are the symptoms of autism and what causes autism?why do some people have it and not others?
I have a cousin who has autism he's 2 years younger than me he's about 15 years old and when i went to school the other day i punched somebody in the nose becouse they tried to beat him up and i was thinking in my head no they did not just slap my autistic cousin what should i do?

This website should answer all of your questions about Autism. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Autism

As for the fighting, you're no better than the person that was beating up on your cousin if you hit them back. There are so many better ways to handle a situation like that. I know that you probably acted out of anger and didn't have a lot of time to think about what you were doing, but for the future, have a plan. Physical fighting is never the answer. It's not going to help your cousin. It's probably only going to make him feel like a total loser. He'll be grateful to you of course, but he should learn to be able to defend himself. You can help with this. Teach him some things he can say to defend himself verbally, and if he gets attacked first, some defensive moves he can do. If you end up in a situation where he needs help, don't throw a punch at the other person. Separate them from your cousin and only defend yourself and your cousin from them. Don't go after them. I know it's going to be hard, but it's a better way to do it and I know that you can. Good luck. :)

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-- I'm currently 32 years of age.
-- Obviously, a female.
-- I have a cup size of AA.
-- I am very embarrassed.
-- And this is where you fall into place.
-- I need an IN-HOME REMEDY or MAKE YOURSELF
CREAM or something to increase my cup size.
-- Buying something is not an option.
-- Thanks in advance.

Sorry to say, but there's nothing that's going to work. I'm just about the same size as you and yeah, it really sucks. I totally feel your pain. You shouldn't let it run your life though. There's so much more to you than your boobs, but if that's all you're focusing on, then there really isn't. Since you don't have much of anything, you're going to be unsuccessful if you don't change your way of thinking. Be confident about yourself, and whatever you are trying to accomplish by getting bigger boobs will happen. I'm sorry if this sounds extremely cliche, but it's the truth.

I have started getting padded bras and they help a lot more than you would think. My fiance commented on how much better I look when I wear them.

Unless you are getting surgery, please don't pay money for something that claims to make your boobs bigger. It's a huge waste of not only money, but time and hope as well. There's just nothing you can do. If there was, everybody would know about it and a lot of people, especially me, would try it.

I wish you the best of luck. Be strong and confident, and you won't even need it! :)

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Can you be a Christian and be bisexual?? Because I know a lot of people that go to church but they are bisexual. Personally it doesn't bother me but it bothers other people, so is it ok??

Of course.

I'm not going to say whether bisexuality is a sin or not because there's no need to get into that. Even if it is, there is not a single Christian out there that is sin-free. Living a sin free life is impossible. The only person that ever lived without sin was Jesus.

Yeah, it's going to bother some people, that can't be helped. The open expression of bisexuality is relatively new in the world. Some people just aren't ready for that yet and feel that their religion is somehow threatened.

If those people bother you to the point of not being able to take it anymore, bring up their own sin. "Yeah that person over there might be bisexual, but what sins have you committed today? Maybe you'd be a better Christian if you admitted that you are a sinner too instead of focusing so much on others. You are no better than them in God's eyes." As true as that is and as shocking it would be to the person that you said it to, I'd just let it go if I were you. You could get into massive trouble for that.

If the people that are bisexual are having a hard time and don't feel accepted in the church anymore, you could talk to them and tell them how you feel. They would then know that someone is on their side which is always a good thing. Don't fight fire with fire. Instead, do good to your enemies. The results will be better. Good luck. :)

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Iam 17 years old and iam not autistic but there's this boy at school who has the milder form of autisim i don't know what it is called i just know it's a milder form of it.my friends and I get so aggervated with him becouse he constantly repeats things over and over even though i know he can't help it i get so annoyed i start screaming at the poor boy.I even get mad at him if he stares at me for know reason even though i know it's probally becouse of his autisim and he can't help it.I don't talk to him about it I just start screaming at him like iam crazy or something and i know iam being a bitch to him right now and i feel terrible and I cry myself to sleep at night thinking about just all the terrible things i say by screaming at him i just feel so horrible and feel like such a bitch right now I just want to try to change and be nicer to him or at least stop screaming at him sometimes i even think about slapping him,but i just say to myself remember Rachel he can't help it he's autistic and that keeps me from slapping him if i feel this bad i can just imagine how he feels at night.I feel so bad about the way I treat chad that yesterday i really thought about committing suicide so I couldn't treat chad that way anymore so he wouldn't have to have a horrible day at school every single day please help me change.......

I know this might sound crazy but I have an idea for you. I think that you should talk to Chad about it. Tell him that you don't mean the things you say and that you really want to change. Basically, say most of the things you said here. Ask him to forgive you. Talking to him about it should help you feel a lot better. It'll also probably make him feel better too. He'll know that you don't hate him and that you are sorry. I'm sure he's a strong person and he understands what is happening more than you think. Maybe he doesn't take what you say badly at all. You can never know unless you talk to him.

As great as it would be you can't just snap your fingers and change. You know you want to change and you know what you want to change, so that's a great start. It will take some time, but I think that it will be much easier if you and Chad can come to an understanding. I think it would be even easier if you got to know him a little better. Try to be a friend to him. I know that might not be possible because of social pressure, but at least try to find some of the good things there are about him.

If you are dedicated enough to stop what you're doing, you can. Don't let your image or your reputation get in the way of what you know is right. What you think of yourself is much more important what other people think. Good luck!

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My friend was dianosed with mono last week, i didnt know this and i drank out of her water bottle, is it possilbe that she is still contagious?

Yes, it's possible. Go to the doctors as soon as you can. You can get tested for mono there and I believe that if caught soon enough, you can be given medication to lessen the severity of the symptoms. Here's a webpage that should answer all your questions. :)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mononucleosis

Good luck, I hope you don't have it!

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ok....today at school this gurl named kayla (the gurl who leaves me out) said that her and rikki (my bff) were going to a festival together without me. it made me feel bad cause my best friend didnt even tell me, and i wouldn\'t of gotton mad if she did. also today...i was telling her bye on the bus when i had to get off and she said \"go samantha...i am trying to sit by rikki!\" and she was really rude...and you know, you get the small things everyday. she will come up to talk to her in the hallway and just ignore me and she will give her hugs, sit by her at lunch and all that stuff and i have triend over and over and over to make friends with her and she still is rude because she wants rikki to herself. i know if i tell rikki, she will get mad because she dosent think kayla is being mean or rude to me. thats just the way she is. she also just talks to kayla when kayla is around us, unless i statrt a conversation between us. also...if i just go on my own and not talk to them...i dont have any other really good friends so i would be all alone if you say that they are being bad friends...i would rather be treated like this than be all by myself. i have cried myself to sleep thinking about this. please please help.

You need to talk to Rikki. She won't get mad if you say the right things. Don't talk about how mean Kayla is being to you. Instead, tell her how Kayla is making you feel. If Rikki is your best friend, you should be able to tell her when you are upset. In all reality, Kayla probably isn't being all that mean to you, but that's not what matters. What matters is how bad she is making you feel. I think that if you can keep the conversation focused on yourself instead of Kayla, Rikki will understand. Rikki has her own opinion of what Kayla is doing to you, so she can argue against yours. She has no idea however, what's going on in your mind and won't be able to argue with that. I hope that everthing gets worked out and I wish you the best of luck. :)

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I am 13 and obvisily a female. I had my period when i was 12 in november and havent had one again. And guess what month it is? It has been about a year, and of course i havent had sex. I know it takes a while to get regular but all my friends have started and they say i should see a docter. Should i see one? I have been worried about this a lot. Please help.

There's probably nothing wrong, but there's no reason to keep it from your doctor. Don't run out and schedule an appointment because this isn't something you need to worry about. When you go in for your yearly physical, your doctor should ask if you have any questions and if you have a regular cycle. If none of this comes up, bring it up yourself. Let your doctor know. There's no harm in it, and if it did happen to be a problem, you'd probably be able to get it resolved. If you don't get a yearly physical, you should start. Good luck! :)



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Why is it that guys like lips, mainly pouty lips, so much? My boyfriend told me "pouty lips are sexy" (he told me I had pouty lips). I asked him why he thought they're sexy. He said, "I don't know, they're just a major facial feature"

Thank you :]

He's relating the shape and size of lips to kissing. He likes your lips and thinks about kissing you when he looks at them, it's pretty simple. It doesn't mean that he thinks you look sad or anything like that. The lips are a sensual part of the body. It's like having a nice butt. Not everyone is going to think you have a nice butt, but the general consensus is going to be that you do. Maybe not everyone is going to think that your lips are sexy, but a lot of people will. It's just an attractive feature. Be proud that you have it! :)

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