Hi I'm Jeannie.I would love to help you with any questions you may have, so feel free to ask, no question I would ever consider stupid or embarassing so don't worry. Also, I am a college student, and I have been through a few things, so if you would like my opinion just ask, if not then please specify. And remember that you are beautiful no matter what you feel or what you are going through. :)
Gender: Female Location: Florida Occupation: student Age: 18 Member Since: June 25, 2008 Answers: 252 Last Update: May 4, 2011 Visitors: 22951
Main Categories: Spirituality Families Illnesses View All
Favorite Columnists Advicelady6798 Faith42 ediemarie y-vet_07 candycanez911
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Just to make it simple...
I(18) met this girl(18) from school and she recently broke with her boyfriend. We've been together for 10 months now and we are so happy with each other. She love me so dearly and told me that I really mean everything to her.
How come, when she went home for the holidays, everything changed she told me that she doesn't have feelings for me and she wants to end our relationship.She told me that she's back with her boyfriend the one that she broke up a couple of months ago...
just want to ask is it possible for a girl to loose her feelings over a guy or is it she still have feelings for her other boyfriend.
(link)
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Honestly I know this may not be what you want to hear, but people do change, and maybe she did love you and she loved him too. Its not that her feeling werent valid, maybe she just felt like a different person when she was with him then she was with you. I don't know if that made sense.
Anyways, I wouldn't blame yourself, she wasn't right for you and you will find someone who is right for you, when the right moment comes along. Just trust it and relax and enjoy the ride.
Best of luck to you :)
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Ok. I know everyone is going to say that I am to young for this. Well I am a 14/f and I had sex for the very first time. I am not on the pill and I think I might be pregnant. My boyfriend and i have been dating for 2 years and i thought i was ready. We used a condom but he put it on inside out. It has been 2 weeks after we had sex and i am feeling uncomfortable. I have not had my period yet and i have been feeling sick everyday. I do not know if i am pregnant and i do not know how to tell my boyfriend please help! (link)
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First of all you need to see if you are pregnant so get a test or see a doctor. Then if you are you need to just be upfront and honest. Sometimes stuff like this is mind over matter so you thinking you are pregnant can make you sick, so before you jump to conclusions just check and see first.
If you are, tell him you are be honest and tell your parents. Please next time be more careful. 14 is kind of young but it is your life and I can't tell you what to do so I am just asking please be responsible and consider all options before you make a final decision.
Good luck with everything. :)
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I'm 16/f and a junior in High school. I've liked plenty of guys and have had a few friends and all but, if I can't talk about "doing it" with someone, or wearing tighter clothes, I don't fit in, or I'm not "hot enough" to date anyone. I'm so sick of this. I feel like a complete loser because I haven't slept with a guy (or even kissed one for that matter). It's annoying, I just want to get through High school, but it's hard when you have to do certain things to be friends with people. Any advice?
HSBLE (link)
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I know exactly where you are coming from, and you do not need to change who you are to be friends with someone. ANd if you do then they aren't worth it. I am 17 years old and I just got my first kiss like 2 months ago, its worth it to wait, b/c it makes it so much more special. Trust me highschool is hard enough without having to worry about fitting in. But Just take your time and wait for the right moment, b/c believe it or not, the moment will come. You haven't kissed a guy yet, b/c the timing hasn't been right and that is 100% okay, I absolutely promise. I waited and I don't feel weird about it, I am not popualr with all the guys yeah it is true, but at least I have the respect. The sluts may be popluar now but it doesn't mean the guy is gonna marry them.
Please just be who you are and don't feel like a loser, b/c I feel like that too sometimes, and trust me you so aren't a loser, you ahve alot of respect for yourself and your body and that is really remarkable especailly for this day and age.
If you have any questions about highschool or need to talk, just write me, I am always here to listen to everyone :)
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hey.so ive been with my boyfriend for 3 days lol
but anyways we like each other a lot, and tell each other everything, so everything is fine...
but he was in a 3 year relationship before me, and asked her to marry him, and she said yes....but she cheated on him. They've been broken up for a while, but what are somethings i should, or should'nt do to like make him think about it?
And he also works with her mom, and i guess they have a pretty good relationship...
or what should i do to keep us going good, and keep him interested in me i guess???
me 18, him 20.
Thanxxx!! (link)
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Honestly he has been in relationships before you, and you have to accept that. But the best thing to do, is just put energy into your new relationship with him, and be yourself. Just be who you are, b/c if he loves you for you are, then it is worth it. But you cannot force someone to move on, they have to take the iniative. Just have fun and get to know him, b/c in time everything will be fine, and you will be together, and he will have moved on.
Just let him make the first move and let it fall into place.
Have fun too and good luck with everything :)
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i think i am in love with my boyfriend of 2 and a half months. is it too soon to tell him i love him? and since i am the girl (we are both 16 btw) would it be weird to tell him before he tells me? (link)
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No it is not at all weird to be the first one to tell him you love him. I can't really tell you it is too soon or it is not. Only you can answer that. You really have to follow your heart on this one. B/c once you say it, those three little words eight little letters, it is out there. Once you say 'I Love you' it takes that whole relationship to the next level, so ask yourself, if you truly are ready for this then yes by all means go right ahead and tell him you love him. But don't be afraid to wait until the right time.
The fact that you said you think you love him, indicates to me that you aren't totally sure, and that is 100% okay. You should never say or do something that you do not truly feel in your heart. So my advice, is to just give it a little more time, maybe hint at it a little. And see how he really feels.
Love is the most powerful emotion, it is the key to living in this world. Without love, life wouldnot exist. Love is everywhere too, and we all love the people in our life. SO you can love him as a boyfriend, and even as a person, without being totally in love with him. Does that make sense? If you love him and he makes you happy, think about this, does he make happy, can you be totally yourself around him, does he make you laugh, is he there for you when you need him most? If you said yes, then yes it is possible that you love him, and it is okay to say it. Just be aware that he may not say it back, and thats okay, b/c wouldn't you rather he be honest with his feelings rather then just saying what he thinks you want to hear?
I know this was extremely long, but I hope I helped clarify your feelings for him. I hope everything works our for the best for you. And if you choose to ignore everything that I have said, then please just listen to this: think smart and follow your heart. That is the best advice that I can give you :)
Let me know if you need anything else, feel free to ask :)
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okay so at a party a guy tried to hook up with me....(just makeout not like actual sex or itd be rape) he basically forced me up against a wall and i couldnt get out of it...my boyfriend of 3 months walked in and he had to saddest look on his face that ive ever seen and he just walked out the door when i tried begging him to come back. my boyfriends friends with a few of my friends and they said that he was so heartbroken and i feel like shit because i feel like i wasnt cheating on him, even though it looked that way. i like him sooo much and i would never wanna lose him but i think i did =( my friends say he said he doesnt wanna talk cause hes too upset...what should i do? =(((
16/f (link)
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I am sorry you are in this situation, but the first thing to do is to give him a little time to cool off, then talk to him face to face, tell him the truth, that you really did get forced up against a wall, and everything. Then after you explain everything to him, tell him how you really feel about him. Tell him how much he means to you and just be honest. I'm sure everything will get better, but it will take time. Oh one more thing, when you are talking to him, tell him face to face in person, b/c texting and on the phone doesn't cut it.
Good luck with everything, and just give it alittle time, I can't give you a set time, just when the opportunity presents itself take it.
Good luck :)
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15/F
I've never kissed a guy but over half the kids I know have already lost their virginity or gotten way close to losing it. And they're all like "YOUVE never kissed a guy? youre gonna end up like the 40 year old virgin, oh i know this guy for you" or whatever
And I 'pleasure' myself and stuff but just doing that, I feel SOOO guilty like I cant leave my room after.
And theres this guy that wants to do stuff with me and I really like him, and I talked to my mom about how I dont think hes that good of a person to hang around and she told me how my sister lost her virginity to a guy when she was my age.. which didnt really help.
But I reallly wanna do SOMETHING with a guy to know how it feels.. but at the same time I dont because I like being special, and feeling proud, and seeing peoples reactions when I tell them.
I just don't know what to do :[
this is highschool and its hard (link)
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You should never do something because you feel like you have to or b/c ppl want you too. Otherwise that will lead to regret. Honestly I am in the same position. I am 17 right now. And its November now, I didn't get my first kiss until last august 2008. And I am 17!!! It doesn't matter how old you are. Anyways, I waited out until I felt in my heart that it was the right moment. It meant soooo much to me you have no idea, and it will for you too if you wait for the right time with the right guy. And sex, please that is so over rated. I personally am remaining abstinent until marriage, b/c I want to prove to myself that love doesn't equal sex, and it does exist and is stronger. And I am not scared of ppl knowing. And you shouldn't worry either. I know you may want to do it, and yes highschool is hard. But it is OKAY to say NO. I promise, because I lived it, I lived the pressure, and I said no, and I can tell you that yes I am happy, I may not be popular with all the guys, but I have the respect, and that speaks mountains. I promise. Respect is so much more important, respect for yourself, your body and the people around you.
God bless you for waiting, and don't you dare be afriad to say no, there is nothing wrong with that, I promise.
I understand how you feel, b/c I stood in your shoes, and still am. So if you ever want to talk about it, give me your email, and we can talk about this. I promise :)
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M/16
I'm so far stuck inside my head. I can't think straight anymore. I feel like I'm just fading away, I don't find any kind of reason to keep waiting to see whats next in life. I've waited for all too long now and I've been growing tired. Every time I find some hint of hope something tears it away from me and I have to crawl back once again into a mode of depression. Though I never act upon them, I've had thoughts of ending everything or though what if I never existed. None of my friends help me or notice when I've left my guard down and exposed how I feel. I'm even being rejected by others whom I thought were friends. I'm practically abandoning hope on myself. The only thing that's made me truly happy was when I had a girlfriend. But when we broke up, I thought I could find someone new. Now I'm in a state of where I just don't see anything in anyone anymore. Everyone is disgusting to me in some way. I feel sad that everyone can let me fade out so easily, I feel angry because no one is doing anything about it, I act like I'm happy all the time, I'm totally apathetic when no one is around and inside my head I'm having a storm of emotions and thoughts run through my head like data on the internet.
I'm a nice person, I have a attractive personality, I'm not exceptionally good looking but I don't care much for that, I'm intelligent, and quite humorous to people. I give great advice I've heard and I'm looked up to a lot. So why is it I'm feeling the way I am? Why can't I get a hold of things? Why does it all seems so hopeless to me?
(P.S. No one recommend medication or seeing a psychiatrist or shrink at all. My parents wouldn't even consider this at all logical or necessary.) (link)
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Honestly, the reason you may feel so hopeless is because you loved your girlfriend, and you felt like you could be yourself and be happy. It is just a stage I promise, because everyone goes through a breakup, everyone realizes people they thought were their friends really arent. Sometimes I feel like I am fading too, honestly everyone gets like that. The reason you can't get a hold of things is b/c its all in your head, you even said it, you feel stuck inside your head. That doesn't mean somthing is wrong with you, I am sure you will be fine. What you need to do is sort how you really feel.
YOu obviously are not too far gone, b/c you have never acted on your suicidal thoughts. Thank God, please dont.
Maybe if you talk to someone about how you feel about it, not therapy, I mean a best friend, asibling or parent. B/c if you are honest with them and yourself you will come back to life, and really live it, not just be stuck inside your head. Sometimes, when you are afraid of something, or feel lost if you just face it, it goes away. you can overcome, actually you will overcome it.
Good luck with everything, but don't give up hope, because w/o hope there is only despair left. And thats a sucky emotion. trust me. :)
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I've had depression since about 8th grade..i'm a senior now. I know its gotten a lot worse. I used to never wear makeup and stuff but now when i look in the mirror i hate hate hate how i look and try to use makeup to fix it. i never look in the mirror and it completely ruins my day if i see how i look cause i think i look like shit all the time. i hate taking pictures cause i look retarted in every picture. my best friends are soo pretty and i feel like crap compared to them. i used to have my blinds open all the time cause i loved having the sunlight come into my room..but now they are ALWAYS closed. i hate seeing my face in the sunlight i can't even explain. i probably sound really emo..but i promise you i'm not. i have a lot of friends and i'm always happy with them but by myself i'm so depressed. will meds for depression help this at all cause i just want to be comfortable with how i look like i did in middle school (link)
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Honestly you shouldnot compare yourself to everyone else like your friends, b/c you are different then them and you will never be them. But don't worry about how you look, we all have something we do not like about ourselves. Don't be afriad to let the sunshine in, alot of your depression may be caused by your sleeping habits and eating habits.
The reason I say that is b/c when I'm tired I'm in a bad mood and always feel like crap, the same with when I eat junk food. But if you eat healthy and get a good night sleep, I promise the next day will make you feel better. If looking in a mirror ruins you day, then don't look, but don't let the mirror define who you are. ITs not worth it. Its okay to wear make up, I do, b/c I look like crap with out, But I don't wear a ton of makeup, I just accentarate my feature, I bring out my skin tones and eye color. That way it looks natural and i feel comfortable.
The key to not being depressed, is by being comfortable in your own skin, and you do that by looking at your good qualtites rather than focusing on the bad ones.
I hope that at least made some sense. :) Good luck with everything and don't be so hard on yourself, its not necessary. I promise, you are beautiful, you just need to believe it. :)
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so i have this friend.
and we used to talk everynight on the phone.
and we'd text all the time.
we'd say i love you in the halls at school.
[no, it wasnt an absessive relationship or anything...]
now he stopped answering the phone && he stopped calling.
he stopped texting. butt he still texts my friends.
now we dont even talk at school. :/
is he even worth it?
i sorta started falling for him.
and then people started asking if we were going out.
maybe they asked him too and it got akward?
butt my best friend says hes not worth it and to drop it.. i dunno. should i? (link)
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Let me just start off by saying that the same thing happened to me. This guy and I both liked each other, he was the first guy to say he loved me, and it my first time saying I love you to a guy. I mean I really cared about him. We would laugh all the time, he would always tell me he loved me and held my hand. His friends asked if we were going out, he kind of got a little awkward after that. I think what happened was that he really did like me, but he was scared of taking a chance, as was I. And let me tell you, I regret not dating him. I always kick myself over it, b/c now Ill never know how he really felt, b/c I didn't ask. I let him slip away. I let our real feelings fade, and now I just keep wondering what could have should have happened, rather than just following my heart. I wouldn't say to drop it, b/c I did, and it led to regret for me. The best thing I can tell you is to follow your heart, b/c if your feelings are real for each other, you will find a way to date eachother and there will be no regrets. I wish I could still have that guy, but he's moved on, hes actually kind of a jerk at times, I wish I had dated him before he changed. IDK, just follow your heart. Sorry about the rambling, I just wanted you to know why Im saying don't let him go.
Best of luck! Don't lose this guy, :)
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Before I begin, let me just say that this is a LONG scenerio!
Towards the end of June, I met an amazing kid, infact he was too good to be true. Throughout summer we hung out 3/4 times a week and I was really starting to like him, a lot. He would even borrow my car when I was at work because he didn't have a car at the time, and I trusted him. He never acted suspicious and we spent so much time together I was falling in love with him. Once school started I started to pick him up in the mornings so he could go to school with my car and I would let him use my car when I was at work. And we would chill everyday after I got out of work, and we would always be together on my off days. We were together every single day & it was starting to surprise everyone. He needed to find a new place to live and it was stressing out the both of us because I'm not 18 yet and he is 21. I did everything with this kid, sexually that is, but never had sex with him because I didn't feel as if I were ready yet. & he always said "I don't need to have sex to be in a relationship." He was going through hard times, and I even helped him out by giving him money (prob spent around $1500 on him in 3 months.) All of a sudden, out of the blue, he broke up with me. He told me it was because he couldn't do it in this town, and he didn't want the problems from his past to be a stress on me. and how I had a good life going for me, and I need to graduate from highschool, go to college, etc. He said he had other things to worry about, and he didn't want to be in a relationship. However, when we first met he always said he didn't want to be in a relationship but appearantly I was differnt for him.
Even after we broke up, we see eachother every single day. Most people would probably see it as FWB (Friends w/ Benefits.) I personally don't have a problem with it, but I just feel liek lately there is another girl involved. I don't want to jump to any conclusions, because I'm not sure. He also happens to be VERY close with my cousin, they are almost together everyday.
I feel like he is bipolar, when no one is around we'll just cuddle and watch tv just kiss, fool around, etc. And when people are around he won't even sit next to me, he'll sit a few feet away.
I just don't know whether I should just blow the kid off, tell him to stop calling me or just deal with it until he leaves town, which is in the next few months. (link)
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You really need to talk to him about it. Like seriously have a sit down conversation and ask him what the heck is going on. I don't know him personally so I can't tell you what he is thinking. And as for thething with your cousin you really need to see whats goin on. Ask him how he feels and why he has like nothing to do with you in public. After you talk to him then decide if he's worth putting up or walking away from.
Good luck with everything :)
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I'm 13/f. I just started middle school since i'm in hong kong and the whole school thing is different. So when i started school there was this girl who used to stick to me all the time and hold my arm and stuff like that. Then after a few days she stopped. then she started doing it to other people and i get jealous. and i always dream about her and think about her. i think i like her but i don't want to be a lesbian. like i get all shy around her and blush and brush my arm against her and stuff, and get really happy when she looks at me or talks to me.
but the problem is, she holds hands with different people all the time. i don't think its so serious, and i'm not planning to tell her i like her. but how can i forget about her? i really don't want to like her but i can't help it.
PLESE PLEASE PLEASE its been bothering me a lot and all i can think about and talk about is HER! i try to act like its nothing but i'm dying!! (link)
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Honestly, you are 13, I really don't think you can consider yourself a lesbian b/c you are still growing. It's okay to look at other people and think about them, by like admiring them. You may just want to experiment. But I wouldn't worry about it, b/c you have plenty of time to decide if you are or are not a lesbian.
If this made no sense I am sorry. It is hard to be a teenager, b/c there are so many things to worry about in life. Don't worry about being a lesbian, only time will tell who you really are. But no matter what happens, please don't judge yourself any differently.
Best of luck to you :)
I think it may be bothering you, b/c pyschologically you are worried about liking her, just relax and see what happens.
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Okay so i developed real early and im very mature. i'm 14 but i honestly do looke atleast 17 or 18 & act this way to. well theres this real sweet hot kid who is 19..and he always says "i wish you weren't so young" blah blah. i know it is against the law to do anything with him, but it's like my body/personality dont go with my age. it's like im in the wrong time zoneish haha. well me and him have been thinking about it and always talk about hooking up. i just don't see why it's such a big deal. but if i were to do anything with him, how would anyone find out? i don't see how he could get in trouble. so my question really is, is it wrong to be in love with someone who is 5 years older then you? (link)
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It is not wrong technically to be in love with someone five years older than you. As for your ages, I honestly believe 14 and 19 is kind of rocking the cradle. But it is your decision if you want to be with him. He can get in trouble, if he has sex with you with out your consensus b/c then it is considered rape and you are a minor. People will find out if you tell them, if you don't say anything then no will know. But honestly, I know you may look like you aren't 14, but seriously, don't just jump into something with a 19 year old, your young, and that isn't a bad thing, you should really enjoy with the body God has given to you, with out taking it for granted. All I'm saying is, to please make an appropiate decision, about whatever you decide to do with this guy.
Okay, sorry if I sounded like a mom, I just don't want you to get in over your head and get hurt.
Good luck :)
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Do girls think magicians are hotter than guitarist,drummers and jocks?
Some find them creepy while some find them hot.
What is your take on this?
thanks (link)
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Honestly, I'd rather date a guy I have a lot of stuff in common with, while we disagree from time to time. I don't think magicians are creepy, but it is also not my cup of tea. I love music, so I'm more inclined to date the guitarist. However that doesn't mean that girls won't like you because your into magic, it depends on the person, b/c everyone is different. WE all have different tastes in things. The last guy I dated was into running, I'm not but we also had a lot of differences, honestly you cannot have a good, thriving relationship unless it is built on trust and commonalities.
hope I helped, good luck :)
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My best friend's brother is a senior this year. I pretty much live at their house, so I have gotten to know their whole family pretty well. Well, their mom really wants me to write him a senior letter for his retreat, but I have NO idea what to write? Give me some ideas please! My friend said I didn't have to write it, but I'd feel bad if I didn't.. Thanks! (link)
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Just write from your heart. Say how much he means to you, your favorite memories of him, and wish him luck in the future. About the future, you could even use lyrics to songs, like "My Wish" by Rascal Flatts That should pretty much cover everything.
Good luck :)
Theres is many options lets me know if you want more :)
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Can anyone tell me some famous groups of 4? Me and 3 of my friends have to dress up like that for Halloween.
(other than the beatles) (and other than sex and th city...we loveeeed that idea...but it was already taken)
THANKS! (link)
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umm...
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
Mean Girls
John Tucker Must Die
Disney Princesses
thats all i can think of...let me know if you need more ideas :)
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I like my ex - boyfriend and i know he likes me too cause he tells me all the time. but im scared of taking the chance and being with him again because it hasnt worked out in the past. and also my bestfriend would probably just tell me its a horrible idea. she tells me all the time that it would just be a waste of my time and i wouldnt be happy. i know its stupid but i dont want to disappoint her by trying things again with him. should i just forget what she says and try again, or listen to her cause she probably can see things i cant because i still care about him? (link)
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I thinks it nice that you respect your bestfriend to listen to her, but honestly this is your decision. If you really like him, then give it another shot. People learn from their mistakes and maybe this time it is worth it. So on this decision just follow your heart and make the most of it. In time, you honestly will end up with who you are supposed to be with, so just wait and see what happens.
good luck :)
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My guy friend asked me out by a note 2 years ago and i never responded but i did like him and i still really like him. So i sent him e-mails over myspace telling him how i felt then and how i felt now and i asked him if he still likes me and gave him my number and aim address but he never responded to anything. i want to know if he still likes me or not and i know that he's single and now i don't know what to do. i really want to go out with him but i'm just confused if he still likes me or not. does anybody know what i should do about it??? (link)
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okay I honestly think you have done all you can do for right now. Just give him a chance to respond back to you and take it from there. 2 years can really change some people, and some people change their minds. So just b/c he liked you 2 years ago, doesn't mean he still likes you now. I'm sorry if that isn't what you wanted to hear. But I dont it all for sure, you really just need to give him a chance to answer you.
So in the meantime just relax and really sort out how you feel.
Good luck :)
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16/f
ok so i like 2 guys but I've never really spoken to either of them because theyre a year above me in school. but both seem like they really do like me. so theyre's A and D. I always smile at A when i see him and he always smiles back. we never said anything to eachother yet. but he's really cute and for example yesterday we were standing infront of our classrooms which are close together and we kept smiling at eachother and then he kind of opened his mouth and it seemed like he was saying hi or something but it was quite far away.
then D is like the cutest guy ever. he's really shy around me and we've also never talked before but he's been kind of checking me out for a year now. and once when i cried really hard he saw me, looked at me all sad for a while and actually had to wipe away a tear from his eyes :[
AND he always says hello to my mom when he sees her. But hes really shy around ME though and its quite complicated. but ALSO yesterday after the whole thing with A he was walking by with his friends completely ignoring me at first, but once he walked by he turned around to look back at me and his smile was just soooo cutee. and i mean he did it infront of SO many people. i just dont know which one i should like and try to talk to yet. i dont think talking to both is a great idea because i dont talk to many boys in general which would make it seem weird, besides i already know what theyre like because we all go by the same bus so i hear them talk everyday.
but which one should i choose??? theyre quite similar: very good looking, both play guitar and all the girls like them but they dont seem to care lOl.
i know its hard for you to pick but can you kind of help me on how to realise which one i like more or something. thaaanks (link)
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Hey there,
I don't understand why you can't get to know both of them. Yea, it may be kinda weird and awkward but how else would you know who to choose if you don't find out which one you have more in common with. They may be okay with just being friends with you, or maybe they want to date you, but you can't just flip a coin with out even having one conversation with them.
The best way I can help you choose is if you tell me the way they talk to you and how they act around you. B/c honestly just looking and smiling doesn't signify a whole lot. You really should have a conversation, then you won't have to regret not getting to know them.
I hope I made some sense, good luck! and let me know how things work, just try to talk to them starting with small talk, such as hey hows your day going? or wow the weathers awesome, lame i know, but you get the idea. :)
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what is best way to commit sucide (link)
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there is no best way to commit suicide. I mean seriously, no matter how you do it someone dies and everyone that once knew them or knows them now suffers. Please don't kill yourself. You can rate my as low you would like for not answering your question, I just can't answer any question that I know will cause someone personal harm or death. Please remember that no matter how bad life can be in a particular moment, it will eventually turn around.
So no, there is no best way to kill yourself, theres nothing good or safe about it. If you are having problems, please stay in contact with me, I will pull you out of this, I promise. I know that I can.
Hope to hear from you :)
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