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beckss oh yesMember Since:
April 2, 2006Answers:
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Hello -- I'm Becky. I am here for you, to help you with anything you need help with. I'll try my hardest to answer your questions. It may not always be what you want to here, but know that I always put my time and effort into each answer. I'm not here to gain points from you, when you rate my advice... I don't long for a 5 as my rating. All I care about is helping you. It's ridiculous how people basically go on this website to see if what they is justified and right, and if advice columnists state otherwise, they rate your advice low. For example, a 13 year old girl asking how to give oral sex. First of all, it's not bad if someone warns you to put what you're doing into deep thought and consideration. They are just trying to give you their opinion on the situation. Isn't that the whole point of this website? Exactly. Anywhoooo, I'm 15 years old. Yes, 15. Too young? No! I'm very mature for my age. If you dont want to get advice from a 15 year old, then don't listen to it... However, I'm still going to give you my opinion :)
Florida -- Yes the hot sun, all the variety of people, and the beaches is all here. I love Miami, I've been here all my life and I dont intend on leaving any time soon. I've actually had no choice, since I've never even left the state :0 But that will chance this summer. :) Hmmm... (And it did!)
I go to High School and I am a Freshman. :0
What else? Well, I play the guitar and I have been playing since I was in 4th grade. I love everything about music -- it's my life. Seriously, I either have my iPod to jamm to, iHome, computer... I basically need music anywhere I go, because I really can't live without it. I mean I could, but it would be a very depressing and boring life 0.o
I've gone through so much drama the past few years of my life and I'm not even in highschool. Each time I go through a horrible situation, I learn from it for the next one. It's hard, but that's life. Everyone has drama in their life. Everyone has been betrayed. Everyone is going through or has gone through these stages of seeing who your true friends really are in the end. It's a hard journey, and I'm no where near done with it. But everyone goes through it. And if you have any problems or questions a long the way, I am here to help. :D
advice
i have an alter ego, and it is beggining to make me wonder. i am the type of person who can read Gossip Girl one second and then read a westernn book, or a book on philisophy the next second. during the say, i am petrofied of spiders and will not go outdoors if there is a bee, but at night, i will do anything to be outside, alone with nature.i will spend a whole school day just chatting with my friends about clothes and boys, but when i get home i sit there and analyze their personalitys, seeing what makes each of them good friends, and what i need to watch out for. i have happy pop, heavy metal, rock and roll, chilled out, hip-hop/r&b/rap, and clasical music all on my iPod. some says, ill go out in sweatpants and another day im wearing my micro-mini skirt with the 4 inch stiletos. i am wondering why i am so different, why my personalitys contradict eachother. why do i think so much about the meaning of life somtimes, and the other times im thinking about boys, grinding, and my hair. it drives me crazy knowing that while somtimes i have such a good head on my sholders, other times i have the worst sense of what is right and what is wrong. also, if i was only to have one side, i dont know which to chose. i love being able to be insightful, so i would never give that up, but should i give up all of the mindless, moral-less fun i have with my friends? im torn. please help me, my different selves are confusing me! thank you so much, i know nobody likes to read about me talking about myself for pages and pages.
xoox,
BubblyGirl
Mindless or Deep? Hmmm.. I choose: Both. Why would you want to give either one of them up? I mean, it's good to be insightful at times and its good to be what you say, "mindless", hey but its not mindless... it just acting like a teenager acts. And that's just who you are and I know youre probably confused since it's so different.. but you can't change that and be glad you have both and not just like... a total mindless bimbo who only cares about the stupid stuff in life like boys, kissing, ect. Just be you and dont try and change it;)
i'm moving next year and i'll just be starting highschool. i don't know what i'm going to do because i made a whole bunch of friends here and it's going to suck. i'm not good at making friends. on the first day of school everyone is going to have friends and i won't. :(
how could i make friends?
That sucks that you're moving, but as for making friends: Join some activities that you like and you'll meet people that like the same things as you. Try and talk to the people you have classes with because you'll be seeing them everyday and they probably want to make friends just as much as you do. Everyone goes through this ordeal of going from middle school to highschool and trying to make friends, so you're not going to be the only one that is going to have trouble making them. But if you put yourself out there, you're a bound to make atleast a couple of good friends, if not more. =]
SO i have a boyfriend, we have been going out for a month. We always cuddle, when we see eachother and we see eachother 6 times while dating. We do kiss but not make out. I dont know why, but I feel like I cant kiss. But the thing is, Ive done lot of kises with other guys..& make outs & they said i was good. But now i feel like i cant kiss, & i love my boyfriend so much, I just dont know why. Well, my question is what can I do to give me confident to kiss my love? Like make out, i dont want him to think im bad:s
Thanks for help:)
Aww.. well it's obvious that you like him so much you're afraid to kiss him because you dont want him to think you're bad, right? Well, like you said you've done it a lot of times and you were told you were good so just forget every bad thought in your head when you're with him and just go for it! Besides, even if it is bad, you guys will keep working on it and it'll get to be really really good. I doubt it'll be horrible since you are experienced. So, dont be shy and go for it :)
I seem to sweat a lot. The deodarants that I use do work, because it does'nt smell or anything. But im constantly avoiding shirts with sleeves because I mostly always sweat and there it is, the wet spot that doesnt smell, but it's just there and I hate it! I dont know what to do. I have already gone through puberty, im fully developed and everything, and i found out that im not growing anymore so i just dont know what to do or if itll stop when i get older. But i have had this problem for quite a while and i just need advice on what to do, please please please!
The same thing happens to me, and i hate it too. But dont worry.. you've probably have heard of drysol, right? Well that's good. If you dont want to ask your doctor, a really good deodorant that I use is Secret Platinum, whether you want it solid or not, it works. Hopefully it'll work for you too. I seriously know how you feel when it comes to clothes and not wanting to wear anything thin because you KNOW it will show.. everyone unfortunately suffers through that, and that is why we're here to help :) Hope I did. Use secret.
Im fifteen year old male. Everyone calls me a faggot Im a bit queit and everyone says I just talk to my one best friend austin the most! I only trust him thats it. I like to maitain only a few friendships? Ive had girlfriends before. I know the truth Im not gay? Is it my self esteem?
I know im not gay trust me I like girls.
If you're not gay and you know it, then whats the problem? People call other people gay like if it was a greeting or someones name. I mean... they just say it, and dont mean it. Even if they did meant it, it shouldnt bother you, because you know who you are whether people believe it or not. Being quiet doesnt mean you're gay, you're just quiet. Wow, big woop. Those people need to get a life, and you need to forget about them.
Many people told me I switch moods way to quickly. I only do this around my friend austin, i dont know why but I do? Am I manic depressive? I dont want to ask my parents or a doctor? I do change moods sometimes, however I can get sad when something bad goes wrong or i get sad?
You switch moods way to quickly? Manic Depressive? I dont think so. Getting sad when something bad goes wrong isnt a bad thing. I doubt that you're manic depressive.
hey everyone.
my best friends boyfriend is into some bad stuff. [i hear this from alot of people not just one source and the people telling me dont even know eachother] my best friend and him are happy together. he makes her really happy and she loves him alot. i dont want to see her get introuble because of this because she doesnt do any of it. idk if i should tell her or not im kinda stressed about what to do.
thanks=]
Definately talk to her. You're her best friend, you have to tell her everything whether its good or bad. She'll probably be upset when she find out, but she'll need you to help her through it. And maybe, shell be willing to help him stop doing that bad stuff... but that's up to her. You just have to be there for her.
ok, id like answers only from people who have been with their boyfriends/girlfriends for over 6 months. and preferably ages 16 and up, please. ok well, does it ever feel to you as if yall shouldnt be together? like theres nothing there anymore. youre not all excited to go home and talk to them. you really dont even care. youre not "cheery" around them or talking to them anymore. and you picture them with someone other than you, and it bothers you some, but not THAT much? i dont know what to do. im 16 and hes 17. weve been together 6 and a half months and were each others "first loves". ive never felt this way for anyone else before seriously. hes like a part of me now. but the past couple days ive been feeling this way and i dont know what to do. normally, im absolutely crazy for him, but there has been a couple times when ive been like "we should just be friends", but sooner than i say that, something happens that makes me realize just how in love i am and i could never lose him. so maybe its one of those times again..? or maybe its the gray weather.. ahh someone please help me. i dont want to make a huge mistake and regret it!! btw that whole "taking a break" deal does not swing with us we just dont really agree with it, we're either on or we're off.
This reminds me of my friend and her boyfriend who actually have been going out for almost 6 months. Where its like, you kind of dont care if you talk to him that day or not... but then, you dont see yourself broken up? Well, you should give it some time. I mean, this may be just a phase or... its really how you're feeling? Look, the only person that knows for sure what you want to do, is you. Just try and see if you can see yourself without him, if you cant, then that answers you're question.
I have this friend Kait, she's bi and she goes out with a girl chelsy. They were talking last night and chelsey wanted 2 go to sleep so kait let her, she said good night and chelsy got mad for no reason so they argued all night. We get to school and kait comes up to me lokking so sad and says that shes mad at her. so later at lunch i planned to talk to chelsy to see what the deal was she blew me off. So me and my best friend caitlin go tak 2 her and tell her the truth about how chelsey was talking shit about Kait. SO i turn to look at chelsey and i can see her telling her friend kara watch this im goona go over there and say shit, so i stood up and went up to her and said i know what your gonna do, and i told her back off, she blew past me and started arguing with both Cait's i told her to calm down and she said no. so i tell the cait's to come with me to the bathroom so we just blew her off. jus like she did us. We go to the bathroom and we're all cryin tryin to figure out why would she do that 2 Kait, and us 2. How can someone claim to love someone tell them their sorry and then talk shit about them. Chelsey said that Kait was to controlling, she choose chelsey's friends and other stuff which is bull...kait lost everything to be with this girl and that's how she gets treated? Kait also told me that 2 days ago she asked permission 2 chels if she can go with her friend Jeane, she says yes, she finds out that her grandma has cancer and when Kait calls chelsey back chels is all on her back and pissed off i mean she just had to hear her grandma has cancer and chels is going to scream at her for spending time with her family wtf? SO kait texted chels saying she done with her and when the bell rings we leave the bathroom and chels comes up to her and screams at her more saying how dare you break up w/ me and blah blah blah...so i was just wonderin what is some advice that i can give 2 kait? she really needs it!
It's pretty obvious that she's is WAY better off without this girl. I mean seriously, she treats her like crap... yells at her, talks crap about her? That is not, NOT a good gf. And she is probably going to be happier without her than she was with her, whether she sees that now or not. Explain to her that she doesnt deserve to be treated like that and she did the right thing by breaking up with that girl. Dont worry, you're friend will get through this sooner or later, and you're a good friend wanting to help her through this :]
so i'm getting my braces off in less then a week
and i'm just wondering what exactly happens?
Like the process, and what if you have stains?!
Stains? Do you mean... the glue that made the brackets stay on? They remove that. And it goes away after you brush a few times and stuff. You're lucky you're getting your braces off! Enjoy. :]
My breasts are kinda cone shaped, they're not round. Is this normal? It seems as if so many girls' breat are round, not cone shaped. I'm very self concience about this and won't even let my boyfriend see me naked. We've been together for 8 months now, and he gets pritty upset, 'cause he thinks I don't trust him. But please, tell me..Is it normal? I feel so weird and disgusting when I look at them. And plus, one is WAY smaller then the other, and that just adds to the self concience-ness. It's not like it's a small differce, it's a HUGE differnce between sizes. It's very noticable, but I cannot have surgery being as I've only just turned 17. So again, please! Just tell me if this is normal or not. I want COMPLETE honesty. Thank you so much. God bless.
It's normal, im serious. You may be 17 but it isnt going to stay that way, you still have time. Like you said, many girls have round breasts, but not all do, there are girls out there just like you, and its completely normal!
There's this guy that likes me [hes likes me back]
so I was going to see him today [he goes to a different school]
and when i stood next to him.. my other friend came out of nowhere and took me to see someone else. i tried getting a hold of my crush but he said he couldn't leave his backpack in the front.. and my friend had a grip on me.
so i was only gone for like 3 minutes.. i came out as quickly as i could but he wasn't there.
he didn't tell me he was leaving.. there was no bye.
it feels stupid to even be slightly upset.
And he also has my number! He could have called me but he didn't.
I was staying for him for about half an hour then realized he.. just left.
I don't know. Should i even be upset?
I'm not trying to be.. it just bothers me.
It happens to all of us, trust me.
Well, hopefully its not going to be a regular thing thats happening because then you should be upset. But he might of had a reason to go. You left though... he probably didnt know that you were going to be right back. Dont worry about it, just ask him the next time you see him, why he left or something.
does anyone have any tips on " moving on " or possibly " winning your bf back" ahha thanks
Moving On: Meet new people, see if there is anyone you know you want to get to know. Try to get your mind off of him... doing stuff that doesnt remind you of him. I know it might be hard at first, trust me, but you will, sooner or later.
As for "winning him back": Try talking to him and telling him how you feel if you still have feelings for him. Try and see if he may have feelings for you? Like looks, hints... stuff like that. You could always make him jealous, but that doesnt always work. Make sure you really want him back before doing anything like that.
okay so here's the deal. I'm 16/f and my best friend is a guy. He's attractive but i've never really like thought about doing anything sexual with him. He used to date one of my other friends, and now he's asking me to do stuff with him. I'm sure if I should. I'd feel bad because of my friend, but I want to at the same time because I haven't been with anyone in along time. Considering i've only been with 2 other guys. What should I do? Am i bad person for even considering it?
Do you honestly like him? It sounds like you are considering him for the wrong reasons. That is wrong. But do you really want to risk your friendship with the girl he went out with who is your friend? Make sure you actually like this guy before you do anything you might regret.
hope i helped. =]
-beckss
14/f
my parents and i are going on a camping trip this weekend and they said i could invite one friend with us. well, this is really hard for me, because i can only invite one person, and i have two best friends. we always hang out together, but sometimes i do things with just each of them alone. i already mentioned the trip when we were all hanging out together and they both said they want to come. well, that was before my parents told me i could only bring one person, and i don't know who i should pick. one of them, hayley, said she might not be able to go because her parents are really overprotective and wouldn't want her to go for the entire weekend. my other friend, rachel, could probably go, but at this point it seems like it's a 50/50 chance that either of them could go for sure. i like both of them the same, and i have the same amount of fun with each of them. does anyone know what i should do or which i should pick?
First, you should find out whether hayley can go for sure. If she cant, then obviously pick Rachel. If she can, then tell both of them you can only pick one and you dont want to make the decision, so let them do it. It'll probaly work out fine so dont worry just talk to both of them.
what is desperate means? and is that bad? cause people say im desperate and i dont know what that means
im from japan.
Desperate isnt really a good thing to be called. It means that you are willing to go out with any guy/girl that likes you, no matter what.
I have no friends i sit at home day after day doing nothing...i cant make anyfriends because there is literally nobody to make friends becasue i live in a extremely small town with an extremly small school and they all already have there own clicks and wont allow anyone in:S and all my people i hang out with are rude and take advantage of me...what should i do!
Have your tried talking to the people in there "clicks". If you havent, go for it. If you have, keep trying. Seriously, there has to be atleast ONE person who isnt a stuck-up jerk. Some people are open-minded, hopefully youll find people like that and become the best of friends. You may not have to come to this but you can tell your parents that you want to switch school because youre unhappy but lets hope it doesnt come to that ;) i wish you the best.
-beckss
Here's the story. I'm 13/F and I am like the only girl in my school who isn't obsessed with guys. Like, I get crushes and things but I'm not obsessed with guy watching or finding a boyfriend, or getting my first kiss. I feel like it's better to let things just happen instead of pressuring yourself to have it happen because then you might go after just about anyone. I'm also not into make-up and clothes. I don't wear any make-up, except cover up under my eyes to cover dark circles. And don't get me wrong, I like shopping, but I don't love it, and I think talking about clothes and make-up is pretty frivolous and unimportant, and a bit annoying. My weight is the next problem. Alot of my friends are always concerened about their weight and they talk about weight issues alot also. I don't have any problems with my weight though. My friends and I are pretty skinny but they still like count carbs and watch how much they eat, not to be healthy, just skinny and I don't.
My main problem is it makes me feel so different and unattached to my friends. I feel like I have nothing to talk about when they bring up guys and make-up and clothes and weight. I feel like I have nothing to say and I just sit to the side listening to them and wondering how they can be so.. I don't know, they aren't exactly shallow, but sometimes that's how they seem.
Don't get me wrong, that's not all they talk about, and when they don't I love hanging out and talking to them. But when they do I just don't know what to do.
Any help would be appreciated and I'm SO sorry it's so long!!
Its perfectly normal not being like that. I was and pretty much still am like that too. The weight thing, you have to confront them and tell them they arent fat, and its not healthy to eat little, tell them that! The make-up and boys thing... either tell them that you dont want to talk about it and you rather talk about something else, or change the subject. Talk to them. If they are your TRUE friends they will understand and respect the fact that you dont enjoy talking about those things. Take care ;)
-beckss
I've gone to a public school my whole life. Now 7th grade is ending and im going on to 8th grade. My brother goes to a private school and i want to go there. But I'm afraid of leaving behind my friends. I have a much better chance of getting accepted because my brother goes, but my brother doesn't talk to his old friends much. One of my friends who switches school a lot told me that I should do whats best for me, not for my friends. But I'm not sure whats best for me. I want to go to private school to help me with college, but I dont want to stop being able to see my other friends cause i love them so much.
I'll rate high if you try to help me with my decison
Switch schools. You seem like you really want to go to the school, so go for it. If these friends of yours are your TRUE friends then they will keep in touch and dont worry. Just because your brother doesnt talk to his old friends that much doesnt mean you will; you wont. This school looks like its good for you, it helps you with college, your friends should be happy for you and not ditch you but if they do, they arent your true friends. good luck =D
-beckss
Hey I am really jealous of my best friend and recently I have become quite depressed about it and cutting out bits of skin and crying on a night. Her we go:
*We have similar personalities but its like whatever she says goes more than what I say
* She has a big immaculate house, a perfect family and generous parents and she doesn't act a bit spoilt at all but shes always complaing about her life to us.
* she can afford to go to posh gyms and restaurants and buy whatever she wants
* Shes really pretty, even though people say Im prettier, and she looks gorgeous in the simplest of outfits because she's born with a perfect tan and the perfect body.
* its all happening for her: boyfriend( that i fancy n could have had but was too shy to go for it wen she started likin him), partys, money, moving house, more friends
* shes buying all the clothes i want but she doesnt know it and i get depressed because people will think im copying her.
i could go on forever. Everyone likes me just as much as her its just its like she has more to offer and i know i seem like a depressed teenager but i need something to overcome this jealousy before i snap. luv rach xxx
Rach,
You shouldnt be naming all the things your friend may seem has "better" than you. Stop comparing yourself to her. You even said people think youre prettier, they like you both the same.. and im sure you have alot of things going for you. You shouldnt be depressed though, im sure people feel jealous of you too. Everyone does at one time or another. Also, you probaly already know this but someone is always going to be richer, prettier, smarter, sportier.. you name it. Dont let that get to you. Be happy with what you have, be grateful, be you. Oh and you said that people think you copy her, screw them! You shouldnt care what people say or think ;)
hope i helped.
-beckss