about

My name is Laura and I'm 28 years old. I live in Illinois and work as a licensed veterinary technician. I am a runner, bookworm and obviously, an animal lover.


I've been on this site since '05. I take hiatuses, but I'm never gone for good. I enjoy giving advice and I've made such lovely friends on this site that I couldn't imagine giving it up!

chat it up yo.


ps. here's my bestestestest friend.
I love him. You will too :)

advice

ok well when it was summer everything was great for me and my friends and my crush .. but ever since school started everything went down the drain like some of my friends that used to hang out like everyday in the summer and were BEST FRIENDS are not friends anymore and it makes me sad bc they were such good friends.. and also i found out my crush liked me in the summer and now hes completely ignoring me and just everything is all hectic in my life bc i have to deal with all this with my friends and then i also have a job and homework and school to deal with .. do you have any ideas to help me releave the stress? or also make me take my mind off of friends and boys for a while? i feel like i just need to have a fresh start with boys and just everything . thanks in advance

Thanks for inboxing.


First of all, I know how you feel with the friends thing. I went through something like it, so you picked a good person to ask. What I did, was start hanging out with my other friends more, and now I'm really happy with my group of friends. So I think you should try spending time with other friends who you really don't spend a whole lot of time with.


As for your crush, don't let it bother you! You have your WHOLE life ahead of you for guys, and just because things didn't work out with one doesn't mean they never will.


As for school and work, you just need to manage your time. Keep a daily planner. Keep track of your homework in every subject, every day. Write down the days you work and what time you start and end.


And, check out my FAQ on stress:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=549129


If you need any more help with managing friends or school and work, send me another inbox and I will gladly help you out! =]


-Laura (16-f)

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Where can I find a cute leopard hoodie preferabbly under $100. Either in the real leopard print or the silver leopard print. Nothing blue or pink.

Thank You!!

Try PacSun and Zumiez.


-Laura (16-f)

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17/f

My friend is having her 18th Birthday this week. What should I write on her card?
I have known her for about a year but we aren't really very close, we are more accquaintaces than friends but we have become more close lately.

Thankyou.

You can write about a memory the two of you shared. Kind of like a "Remember when..."


Or you can use an inside joke, something only the two of you would understand. I do this all the time and my friends usually get a good laugh out of it.


Other than that,
you can write song lyrics or a friendship quote. If you need some cute friendship lyrics/quotes, just send a question to my inbox and I'll help you out!


-Laura (16-f)

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How do I get a guy to like me enough to ask me out. In case you're wondering, I'm not like hot or anything, my chest isnt huge or anything I'm just normal and I like this guy he likes me back but not enough to ask me out .

Don't force him into anything. Pushing him and putting pressure on him to ask you out will only make him want to ask you out less.


That being said, have you tried talking to him about it? Just bring it up one day with something like, "So, I really like you and I think you like me. Would you ever consider taking our friendship to the next level?"


And if he says no, then that's perfectly ok. Just explain to him that you thought it might be a nice idea because you thought you liked one another.


-Laura (16-f)

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Do you think that people need social interaction to get by? Or could someone get by being alone? As in no friends, and pulling away from family members.
I ask because lately I've been having a way easier time being alone because people I get close to only end up hurting me. But then again, I'm pretty lonely. I can't really win either way. =\
I just wondered what your opinions are.

I think you need an equal balance of both alone time and time spent with others.


You need time alone, because you need time to think and reflect. You need time to do things for yourself and to just be alone. And sometimes, quite frankly, we just don't want to be around other people.


You need time with others, because other people are a huge part of our lives. We rely on others to talk to about our problems, to laugh with, to cry with, to spend time with, and just about everything else.


So, like I said, I think that we need both alone time and time with others in our life.


-Laura (16-f)

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hey, okay, i'm a girl, 14, and i'm not fat but i'm not thin either, i would say i'm inbetween.
all my friends have had boyfriends or at least snogged someone. and i want a boyfriend!!! but i flirt, but after that i'm sort of a dud. and when my friends are all on the pull, i feel sort of awkward; because as sad as this is i'm sort of scared about my first kiss... what can i do?

Honestly? The best thing you can do is wait for the right person to come along. Just because your friends have had boyfriends and kissed boys and you haven't doesn't make you any less "cool" or whatever it is you're feeling.


Think of it this way:
If you go and kiss somebody random, it will be NOWHERE near as special as it would be if it was with somebody that you actually have genuine feelings for. If you just get it over with and go for it with somebody you don't even like, you'll probably end up regretting it in the long run.


I know it may seem hard, but in the end, the wait is totally worth it.


-Laura (16-f)

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hey, advicenators!

so my best friend's boyfriend and i both want to throw my best friend a surprise sweet 16 party!

we have comprised the guest list and pretty much all the little details and it's going to be at her house. our other friends will kick her out of the house and take her shopping or something and we'll invite a few people over to decorate the place, then invite all the people before she gets home and surprise her! both him and i will stay late to clean up the place so that she has NO STRESS and can only concentrate on having a GREAT time.

the way we're organizing it is that we're going to have a facebook event and allow people to wall post what they want to bring (e.g., x napkins, x plates, etc.) or have the option of donating so many dollars in cash. there will be ~ 30 people there so it's not THAT huge of a party. her birthday is in january.

does anyone have any suggestions for the surprise party? there is no theme and everything will be via facebook event except the RSVPing will be "CALL THIS NUMBER TO RSVP:" and give my cell number.

I don't think Facebook is necessarily the best idea. Not only might your best friend see the group, but people might not log in and things just might go wrong.


I suggest doing written invites instead. This way, you can assure that everybody will have been invited for sure, and there's a much less chance of your best friend finding out.


That being said, on the invites you can include: Please Bring: and then put a list of what is needed. Underneath the list, you can put PLEASE MAKE SURE to tell us what you are bringing when you call to RSVP.


Other than that, I think you sound like you have it under control. Just make sure you have everything planned [food, music, activities, time, etc] and you should be just fine!


I hope your party goes well.


-Laura (16-f)

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Are the private novels good?

Yes! They're especially good for girls that are into the Gossip Girl/A List series. I highly recommended reading the Private series.


-Laura (16-f)

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i want some skinny jeans but i dont know where to get them because i got one pair at rue21 and now that i like skinny jeans i cant find any anywhere!
i want some that are preferably under $45-50, but any advice is appreciated!

Kohl's and Steve and Barry's have great skinny jeans!


-Laura (16-f)

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Me and this girl have been friends for a couple of years. We've talked on the phone and I gave her hints that I like her a lot. I wrote her a song on valentines day and remark her on her beauty. She doesn't really back away from me, usually. Until this year, I see her in the hallway, and she'll pretend that she doesn't see me. I'm afraid to talk to her because I think she'll reject or hate me. I really want to know if she likes me. If not, How do I get her to be at least my friend again. I am very patient with her as well. She's the type of girl who really doesn't know how to handle a relationship, so she doesn't call me, makes me do all the work. Sometimes I see her with another guy, the same guy. I still thinks she kind of likes me. I just want your opinion. Thanks!!!

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=532578


From there:
I'm going to start off by saying this: if a girl smiles A LOT when she's around you, she probably likes you as more than a friend.


The Top 5 other things to look for:
1. She laughs at your jokes.
- No matter how many times she's heard them, or how totally lame they are, she'll laugh at them. End of story.


2. She touches you (not sexually, get your head outta the gutter!)
- She plays with your hair, or fixes your shirt or something. Maybe she even holds your hand, that's a pretty good sign that she likes you.


3. She includes you in things.
- She talks to you even when she's with her friends. She makes an effort to include you, like by asking you things. Even lame questions like, 'What color should I paint my nails?' might be her way of trying to include you.


4. She makes an effort to talk to you/see you.
- She texts you just to say hello, she's late to class just because she wanted to hug you good bye, or she calls you just to see what you're doing.


5. She trusts you, and talks to you seriously.
- She tells you things that she might not normally tell others. Like, if she's in a bad mood and tells others she's fine, she'll actually tell you that she failed that geometry test, or her friends aren't including her lately. She opens up to you and isn't afraid to be herself.


Even though every girl is different, these are the top 5 things girls do when they like a guy. So, chances are, if she's holding your hand and texting you saying :" Hey whatcha up to? :)", chances are she's doing it all for a reason.


To me, it seems like this girl is nervous or afraid to like you. I really think you should talk to her about it, and let her know you like her. It's the only way to know for sure and life is way too short to not take chances once in a while.


Best of luck, and if you need any more help send a question to my inbox =]


-Laura (16-f)

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19/f

I play guitar and I have been trying to write lyrics lately. They all sound horrible though because they are so corny.

They also just sound like I've written a story. In most songs parts of them don't really make sence and they arent written like a story.

I've looked on heaps and heaps of lyric and song writing websites but none have been any help to me :S

x

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=549982


From there:
What I think makes the best song, is really putting feelings into it. Writing it so that it provokes an emotion in people when they listen to it. Allowing people to relate to it, and know exactly what you mean. I also think you need something catchy, in it. Like, it's hard to explain...


Alright, I have an example of the feelings portion of my answer, have you ever heard the song "Six Feet Under The Stars" by All Time Low? If not, listen to it. The lyrics are just really good (in my opinion) not only for your question, but everybody whose trying to write songs and I think everyone has those feelings of not being good enough for somebody and wanting to impress somebody. The song just makes you remember a time you wanted so badly to impress somebody, and it provokes an emotion. See what I mean?


And what I said about the putting it in a catchy way, have you ever heard the song "If You Wanted A Song Written About You, All You Had To Do Was Ask" by Mayday Parade? Probably not, but the song has a PERFECT example of what I'm trying to say. During the song, there's a part that says:
"And you dropped the note, and we changed key.
You changed yourself and I changed me,
I really didn't see us singing through this.
Then you screamed the bridge and I cried the verse
and our chorus came out unrehearsed.
And you smiled the whole way through it,
I guess maybe that's what's worse."

The way they put that was just so catchy and I loved it, because they didn't just make the lyrics say something like: 'you gave up on me, I gave up on you, I didn't think we'd make it through this, but you were wrong." blah blah blah.


So bottom line, good songs (to me at least):
1. Provoke an emotion.
2. Put it in an interesting way.


Hope this Helps!


-Laura (16-f)

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In your opinion what is better, A Playstation 3 or an Xbox 360? Please explain why!

I disagree with the columnist below.


I think the Playstation 3 is better. I have first hand experience with both systems [as my brothers have both], and the Playstation 3 is just a better system. The graphics are amazing, and it works [in my and my brothers' opinions] better than the Xbox 360.


-Laura (16-f)

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Is it believing something that cannot be proven nor disproven or not wanting to know truth?

Thanks for inboxing, but I really don't know why you chose me for this question.


I guess that personally, I believe that faith is believing in something that cannot be proven or disproven more than not wanting to know the truth. Other opinions are probably different, though.


-Laura (16-f)

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does anyone know where i can get this shirt? :)

http://a508.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/77/m_622435f5877408dc570d3071bfb71ff3.jpg

My friend just got a shirt exactly like that at Aeropostle, so try there.


-Laura (16-f)

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Hey! So, I've been listening to a lot of alternitive music latley, but I just need some more artists. I listen to people like Cobra Starship, All Time Low, Forever the Sickest Kids, Death Cab For Cutie, and The Maine. I also like people like Jason Mraz, Tyler Hilton and Plain White T's. But I want more people like in the alternitive music. And group is fine, just not something like, really out there. But all suggestions are awesome! Thanks!

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=532581


From there:

If You Like:
That Popish/Punk Sound,
kind of like ALL TIME LOW or PLAIN WHITE T'S,
try the following:

- A Change of Pace.
- The Almost.
- The Audition.
- Asteria.
- Cartel.
- Cobra Starship.
- Every Avenue.
- The Higher.
- Hit The Lights.
- Houston Calls.
- A Kidnap in Color.
- Lights Out Dancing.
- The Maine.
- Mayday Parade.
- My Favorite Highway.
- The Prize Fight.
- Relient k.
- The Rocket Summer.
- Say Anything.
- Sing It Loud.
- The Spotlight.
- This Providence.
- We The Kings.


If you're just looking for some plain good music that doesn't fit into those categories, try:

- Arctic Monkeys.
- Backseat Goodbye.
- Family Force Five.
- Head Automatica.
- Jack Johnson.
- Love Me Electric.
- Metro Station.
- Powerspace.
- Young Love.


-Laura (16-f)

[view]

I'm wanting a list of like love songs such as secondhand serenade- Fall for you.
Pretty newer ones like that came out in the last 5ish years.
Also there's this one about only you know who I am or something like that. so if you know what song that is or think you do please tell me.
Thanks a bunch!

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=545691


From there:
Alive with the Glory of Love: Say Anything.
Amazing: Josh Kelley.
At Least We Made It This Far: Relient k.
Best of Me: The Starting Line.
The Best Thing: Relient k.
California: Metro Station.
Can't Stop: Maroon 5.
Check Yes Juliet: We The Kings.
Cue The Sun: Daphne Loves Derby.
Die Alone: Ingrid Michaelson.
Forever: Chris Brown.
Getting Into You: Relient k.
Hands Down: Dashboard Confessional.
Headspin: Jamestown Story.
Her Eyes: Pat Monahan.
Here in Your Arms: Hellogoodbye.
Hero/Heroine: Boys Like Girls.
I'm Yours: Jason Mraz.
I Caught Fire: The Used.
I Must be Dreaming: The Maine.
I Will Follow You Into the Dark: Death Cab for Cutie.
In My Heart: My Favorite Highway.
Island: The Starting Line.
It Had to be You: Motion City Soundtrack.
Just Another Romantic: A Kidnap in Color.
Leave the Light on: A Kidnap in Color.
Little of Your Time: Maroon 5.
Middle Of The Night: Sherwood.
My Beautiful Rescue: This Providence.
No One Can Touch Us: Sing It Loud.
On Top of the World: Boys Like Girls.
Only One: Yellowcard.
Red Balloon: Backseat Goodbye.
Run To You: The Rocket Summer.
Say it Again: Marie Digby.
Skyway Avenue: We The Kings.
So Much Love: The Rocket Summer.
So, In This Hour...: The Rocket Summer.
Stolen: Dashboard Confessional.
Thunder: Boys Like Girls.
Undeniable: Mat Kearney.
Up and Up: Relient k.
The Way I Am: Ingrid Michaelson.
Think of You Later: Every Avenue.
We're Going to be Friends: The White Stripes.
Who Needs Air: the Classic Crime.
With You: Chris Brown.
You Be The Anchor...: Mayday Parade.
Young Love: Gavin Degraw.


And I'm actually updating that list right after I post this answer, so you might want to check the link in a few minutes =]


-Laura (16-f)

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my boyfriend and i have been dating for quite some time now he and i are both in school but we both go to different schools. he is getting a lot of homework and plus he works at night at the radio station. so we are getting to spend less and less time together and it doesnt even seem like he cares that we arent spending alot of time like we used to. it feels like he's taking my time and my love for granted and he thinks that i will always be there to talk to him. what can i say to him to make him understand my time won't alwasy be available and he shouldnt taken me for granted

Start by telling him what you told us:
That you understand he has school and his job at the radio station, but you're feeling neglected and really down about the fact you two don't talk as much as you'd like.


Maybe when you talk to him about it, the two of you can set up a day/time each day when you call him or he calls you. This way, you can guarantee you'll both be free and it'll be easy to get ah old of each other.


Other than that, all you can do is, like I said, tell him what you told us. Just explain to him how you're feeling without being too harsh. Tell him that you want to be with him, but him not talking to you is really hurting you, and you'd like it if maybe he showed you a bit more appreciation.


-Laura (16-f)

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I love the clique books, don't get me wrong. But I feel like there trying to tell everyone to stay away from boys. They act like it's so difficult to talk to them. ALso, it seems like there comming off as the type who can do anything and thats not how life works. I've only read everything through bratfest at tiffany's DON"T SPILL ANYTHING FROM THE SUMMER NOVELS!

THanks a ton!

I am so sick of the Clique books that I stopped reading them. They were cool when I was in 8th grade and like, freshman year.


But then I, like you, realized they were pretty lame. I do agree that it makes boys sound like some sort of mutant monsters who girls could and should never talk to [when it's really the opposite]. Sorry if that sounds rude, but it's my honest opinion.


-Laura (16-f)

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Bahahahaha I know stupid question, but I honestly don't know.

Like, with a stranger you see in a shop or something. I know you don't go up to them and be all over them, because not only is that an anti social thing to do, but they may have a girlfriend.

But how do you flirt? I really don't know, lol.

Honestly? I just kind of go with the flow. I know that sounds kind of lame, but it's true.


Obviously when you're around somebody you're attracted to, you're going to smile. That almost comes naturally, but make sure you are doing it.


Laugh at guy's jokes. I know from my guy friends that guys like girls who laugh at their jokes, no matter how terrible or lame they are.


Maybe this will help:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=532578


From there:
1. She laughs at your jokes.
- No matter how many times she's heard them, or how totally lame they are, she'll laugh at them. End of story.

2. She touches you (not sexually, get your head outta the gutter!)
- She plays with your hair, or fixes your shirt or something. Maybe she even holds your hand, that's a pretty good sign that she likes you.

3. She includes you in things.
- She talks to you even when she's with her friends. She makes an effort to include you, like by asking you things. Even lame questions like, 'What color should I paint my nails?' might be her way of trying to include you.

4. She makes an effort to talk to you/see you.
- She texts you just to say hello, she's late to class just because she wanted to hug you good bye, or she calls you just to see what you're doing.

5. She trusts you, and talks to you seriously.
- She tells you things that she might not normally tell others. Like, if she's in a bad mood and tells others she's fine, she'll actually tell you that she failed that geometry test, or her friends aren't including her lately. She opens up to you and isn't afraid to be herself.


I know you are a girl and aren't asking how to find out if a girl likes you, but maybe you can try those tips out to SHOW a guy you're interested. If that makes sense =]


-Laura (16-f)

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Recently my mom has been hospitalized because she couldn't move her legs, my dad is getting aggrivated all the time and he's starting to worry about money (we just got a new car for my mom), I've been staying at my best friend's house ecause her mom and my mom don't want me to stay alone (but I'd rather stay home and be alone),school isn't going that great, my boyfriend's been mad at me for the duration that my mom has been in the hospital because I can't talk to him as much as I would when I'm home, and I'm getting frustrated and depressed really bad lately. I just feel that I should just go away and that would make everyone happier...

Any suggestions?

First off, running away from your problems won't do anything but make things worse.


That being said, the first thing I would do is talk to your dad. Ask him if there's anything you can do to help with your financial situation. I don't know how old you are, but maybe you can get a part time job to help pay for things around the house? Just work like 15 hours a week to help provide some sort of a second income to your family. If you can't, try to cut down spending. Buy things on sale and only when you need them. Just shop smart, and you'll start saving money in no time.


For more tips:

only search advicenators.com



Next, you should keep staying with your best friend. If they're nice enough to LET you stay with them, you should be thankful for it and NOT wanting to go home.


As far as school goes, just try your hardest to keep up. Study every night, and go to your teachers when you need help. Maybe you and your best friend could study together, like make flash cards and quiz one another? This would be fun AND really helpful to both of you!


For more tips:
only search advicenators.com



As for your boyfriend, you know what I say? Screw him. If he's MAD when YOU'RE the one going through all of this, maybe it isn't worth it to keep him around. If all he does is bring you down, maybe it's time to rethink the relationship. I don't mean to sound rude or harsh in any way, I just don't think that with everything you have going on already, he should be mad at you.


If you really don't want to end things with him, just sit him down and tell him everything you told us. That you're becoming really upset with everything that is going on and you don't need him being mad at you, as it's only making you feel worse. If he's a true FRIEND [let alone your boyfriend], he'll understand.


I know you said you're feeling really bad lately, but look at it this way: everything happens for a reason, and sometimes you're put into tough situations to make you stronger. Or, as my favorite song puts it, "On dark and stormy days, somewhere it's glowing." There's always hope, and things WILL get better. If not today, tomorrow is a new day =]


Best of luck!


-Laura (16-f)

[view]

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