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April 28, 2014

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Why do guys lead girls on and then stop? Like just completely stop and act as if you guys were just friends and all that flirting never existed?

Because you hang around with the wrong guys. It may or may not surprise you that I have (in my youth) experienced what you describe quite a lot from girls. This is not an issue of being male or female, its an issue of personality and/ or maturity. Kind of people who do this usually look upon it as a game, and/ or as a way to build up their self esteem.

Im suprised by the sexist answers to this question. I wonder how such comments about the opposite sex would have fared coming out of the mouth of a male.

Far be it for me to dispute the "guys are retards" comment though, clearly what you have encountered is due to a genetic lack of IQ.

i used my friends user name and now they think i am trying to get my own account but it won't let me because they think i am my friends acount and i want my own account! but it keeps saying you already have an account! what do i doo! i am despret.

Have you tried erasing your cookies in your browser? I think that should work. (it should be in the "tools" menu for both IE or Firefox, then options or internet options I believe).

do blind people have dreams??

Yes. As long as they were blind from birth these dreams would be sound only. Or so i heard anyway.

hey guys i really need help with this question. "Why do gangs exist?". i have looked everywhere but i cannont find a specific answer to this question. Any answers are fine.

Gangs exist for a number of reasons. On a very fundamental level they appeal to our tribal instincts. Humans have always loved to split themselves off into groups, and these groups have always competed. Gangs can give a very strong sense of belonging. Chimps behave the same way... so do children (boys at least) from a very young age.

Secondly, there might be the need to be in a gang. For example you might live in a bad neighbourhood or school, and forming such a group may be neccessary to survive or to provide security.

Third, its a way to gain respect or to be feared. It gives the members a sense of power and they feel protected by the group. It can be nice to know that you have a number of people that will take your side without question.

Now if you ask me, I think that gangs are just the smallest unit, but the instinct and need to form groups is inherent in most people. If not part of a gang, then perhaps they are fanatical followers of their state football team. We have always defined these groups throughout time.

"Us" vs the guys on the other side of the river. "Us" vs blacks, "us" vs women, "us" vs animals, and also "us" vs other nations. The whole concept of patriotism (which is a far far more recent a concept than people think) was created as an extension of this need to belong as a way to get people to enlist in the army. You barely need to blink and the average human has defined some arbitrary group which he will try to make better than some other arbitrarily defined group.

What do you do if your boyfriend said he wants to makeout, but his "type" of making out does not involve french kissing because he thinks that is gross. What exactly does he mean? What do you do?

Yes you kiss normally and all that. Just keep your tongue in your mouth and he will keep his in his mouth lol. Nothing else should be out of the ordinary.

It's almost 60 degrees in the middle of January.This is probably the warmest winter that I can remember.I can only imagine what the rest of the year's going to be like.

Is global warming the cause,or are there other factors?

One should never jump to conclusions. As mentioned below, the Earth's temperature can swing on its own, without our help. That being said, I am not saying it isnt global warming.

We are not in a position to make that assesment, only our scientists can do that. Of course they can also get things wrong, however they are in a position to make an educated prediction based on the facts available (rarely do we have an absolute truth, instead we have to make do with the best answer we have at that moment). Anything the rest of us do is pure speculation.

That being said, if I am asked to speculate, I would be most surprised if the tons and tons of crap we have been spewing into the environment wont affect the climate. I remember the when they spoke of global cooling, where they speculated that the polution would shield out the suns rays. Later they speculated that it would instead cause the greenhouse effect. Either way I am not comforted by the knowledge that we have created that layer of pollution irrespective what effect it will have.

Sorry, I got off track (often do on this subject). The answer to your question is a definitive, resounding "maybe" :)

hey i was just wondering if there were people out there (or here on advicinator) that think that what hitler did was ethical and support him?
Because i totally dont and i was wondering what were there reasons for thinking so

I have had the "pleasure" of meeting and talking to a few people who supported him (or at least being a Nazi, if not Hitler in person).

One of the things that seems to be central to a lot of neo nazi way of thinking is that they deny the attrocities that he commited. I have heard it a number of times... all the stuff with the concentration camps etc, all of the horrors, they were made up to make him look bad. It was propaganda designed to persecute him.

It reminds me of that club of people who deny that the earth is round. No matter what evidence is presented they claim its all propaganda.

The second part is the whole nationalist/ racist way of thinking. The way they justify the rest of his actions is that to them the white race is being dominated or even eradicated by the presence of other races in their country. A typical argument would say e.g. if Europe keeps receiving refugees from a country whose population keeps rising, and if these refugees mix with the population, eventually there will be no white race. Alternatively, they might argue that the Jews are buying up the place. Either way, their country wont be "theirs" soon. Thats the feeling they have, and its based on a very strong notion of "us" and "them", as though it was martians we were dealing with.

So, Hitler acted in a way intending to protect his country and his race. I dont need to repeat the racist generalisations that they use, but Im sure you get the idea.

Im sure theres more I could add, but I think this pretty effectively summarised the general sentiment in the people I have encountered.

I'm really bad at push ups and I can hardly do more than 3 the proper way with a good posture. (Although I can do almost 25-30 girl push ups easily) Are there any exercises to make those muscles (the pectorals I think they're called) stronger? Or any exercises make me stronger to do push ups better?

At the gym there are many. Things like bench press variants (the heavier the better, screw the girlie weights), dips, flyes etc.

At home its a lot harder if you cant get access to some dumbbells or something like that. I would do whatever pushups you can, and then go with the girlie ones to finish a set (say of 12 or so). Take 1-2 mins break and go again... maybe for 4 sets or so, twice a week. I would expect you to be able to do regular pushups all the way within a few months.

Does water really help your skin? I have really bad skin so I started to dirnk 8 glasses of water a day but as soon as I'm done I have to go to the washroom right away and all the water just comes right out! =S

I dont think there is anything wrong with drinking that much water. Particularly if you exercise, then it could even be more.

I cant say what how it will help your skin, but having to go to the bathroom a bit more often is ok. Dont drink them all at once of course (if you have been, then thats maybe why it all just comes out). This water should be spread out over the whole day, emphasising periods when you have been active.

every meal i eat i seem to be getting bigger, then when i sleep at night it makes me thinner...and theres a BIG difference! i just want to know if this is normal or not. im only 13 and weigh around 106 pounds and im about 5'3'' but i just can never wear tight shirts out to lunch or later in the day because when i eat i get fatter! i have been trying to get a six pack for about a week and a half, because i think that would really help my appearance. i just want to feel good about myself. what should i do?

Im not sure I can help you. Im not familiar with what you describe. I am curious of one thing though, do other people notice this too? The reason I ask is because we can all get very self conscious even about very small changes in our bodies. Sometimes its good to get a second opinion.

Getting a six pack will take some time for most people. It involves a lot of hard work getting the body fat percentage down (though by looking at your weight I am guessing its pretty low already), and serious work to build and define the muscles. If you really want it, work patiently on it. Eat healthy and often, stick to nutritious foods and cut out junk and excess sugar, and it will come.

On a personal note though, you really shouldnt need a six pack to feel good about yourself. Consider the fact that you might be overly obsessing about this. You are very young and have all the time in the world ahead of you. Take your time, be patient, and dont worry so much about it.

how old should you be to kiss your boyfriend?

There is no way to give a specific age. But I think kissing is harmless enough and so its not really a big deal (Im talking about just kissing now). I would say that if you are old enough to legally use this site, you are old enough to kiss your boyfriend.

how many carbs does it take to get you fat per day
and how much fat does it take to make you fat per day
and how do you gain wieght without getting fat
and wat do you have to eat to make the belly fat go away without starving and dieting and eating the food you want

1&2. The amount of carbs and fats to eat in a day should be based on your total calorie intake. This, in turn, is based on your activity level, size, age etc. However, the usual recommendation is that max 40% of total calories should come from carbs and max 20- 30% from fats.

So to calculate first you need to know how many calories you burn. Heres a link:
http://www.stevenscreek.com/goodies/calories.shtml

Once you have your total then you take 40% of it (the max calories from carbs) and divide by 4 (the calories in one gram of carb). That gives you the max total grams of carbs per day. For fat you take 20% and divide by 9 (the calories in one gram of fat).

3. To gain healthy weight you need to do resistance training. The best and most efficient way is to go to the gym and do weights. 45mins to one hour 3 times a week is all it takes.

4. There is really no way to lose belly fat specifically. Fat loss cannot be targetted at all. So, it follows that the only way to lose that fat is to lose weight overall. To do that you need to eat healthy and eat less than you burn. While starvation is never a good option, one might have to stop eating the foods one wants depending on what these are. No magic formula here, just healthy living.

Good luck.

Many people say they need to burn calories, carbs, and fat but how come it's in three categories but when you burn them it's still burning fat? Is it only one that's actually making you fat? My friend is fat and does EXTREME excercing for a year! Walking 3 km a day, and many excercises one hour a day and even eats healthy but she hasn't even gone skinny. Any advice for her? And which excercises would workl to burn fat, caloires, and carbs and which one of these three are actually making you fat?

Sabine's answer is really good. I wont repeat that part about the nutrients since that was covered already. I just want to add a thing or two about exercise.

The idea in weight loss is to burn more than you eat. Diet and exercise go hand in hand here, each complementing the other. The effects of exercise can be twofold. One it can burn calories directly (e.g. running 10 mins and buring 200 cals for example). The second is that it can have a positive impact on your metabolism (such that you burn a few more calories even while you are at rest).

What works best in a proper weight loss program is cardio (running, stairmaster, etc). However, some articles I have read pointed to the benefit of weight training, partially because of the way it is supposed to benefit the metabolism. I have seen, and I have had, great results with a combination of weights and cardio. These can be done as a split routine (e.g. morning cardio, afternoon weights), but also works just fine on alternating days (3 times a week of each with Sunday off).

I do believe that some people are more prone to gaining weight than others. However, I am equally certain that your friend can lose the weight. If she is exercising a lot now, the problem is with her diet. Again, Sabine's answer was very good, the key lies with eating many small balanced meals (every 3-4 hours), with drinking lots of water, with eliminating/ minimising saturated fats in the diet, and with eating fewer calories than one burns.

Hey everyone. I've decided I'm ready to have sex; however, the guy I desire to do it with doesn't want to use a condom and he wants me to go on birth control.

1. Can I get birth control at 16 without my parents knowing?
2. If I was put on birth control and we had sex without condoms and he ejaculated inside of me...is it at all possible to get pregnant?
3. Is it possible to get pregnant from swallowing sperm?
4. Do condoms protect against STDs?

1. not sure but i think so
2. yes but its unlikely, I believe the pill has somewhere between 95-99% effectiveness
3. not at all
4. yes
Nr 4 is the real important one in the equation. Condoms are extremely effective at protecting against STDs.

If I were you I would not agree to this. Even if the risk of getting something is small, it can ruin the rest of your life. Also keep in mind that someone who asks you to do it without protection may have done it unprotected before. That means that he may have already exposed himself to something. Its simply a bad idea.

14/f
ok well i promised to be pure until i get married. a guy at the age of 13 wanted to give up his virginity to me and i flipped so i was like ok i am going to make a chioce. i am going to be pure until marriage.what do guys think my age. will they not like me because of the choice i made? or what.

Its your decision and thats that. No one else should have a say in it. Do whatever you think is right.

As for whether guys will like you, it might create a problem later on. However, any guy that is only interested in sex at your age particularly is not worth it. Seriously, if another 14 year old wouldnt want to be your bf bacause you dont have sex, you need to find some other guys to hang around with. Thats no age to start having sex, and certainly no age to be doing it on a regular basis imo.

Anway, good luck, and stick with what you think is right.

I really like one of my brother's best friends but I'm thirteen - a girl - and he just turned sixteen, and to him I'm probably just some little, immature kid,I'm in 8th grade and he's in 10th. My friends always tease me about it too because he's not hot but he's not ugly either he's just cute. But I don't really care about his looks, I only like him for his personality. Anyway, I want to tell my brother or him that like him but I'm afraid he'll just laugh at me or make fun of me. What should I do?!? You're a guy, what would you do if some little thirteen year old asked you out when you were sixteen?

(First off I should point you to the disclaimer I have on my profile in case you havent seen it... just so you are warned)

Ok, the age difference is significant. Three years at your age means quite a lot. I cant say with certainty how i would have reacted at that age, but I think in most cases I would have said no.

However, being 13 has changed quite a lot since i was a kid. Back then 13 year olds were more child like then they are now... a lot more actually. I mean this both physically and mentally. So its hard for me to say how a guy might react today.

Talking to your brother is probably the best idea, unless he is the protective type that would react badly to the whole idea. Just make sure he can keep his mouth shut (most teens cant).

If you approach the guy, there is the risk that he might laugh or not take you seriously, but if he is a nice guy I dont think thats how he will react. However, you should keep in mind that if he says no, things will be a bit awkward around the house when he comes to see your brother. You can also assume that in 90% of cases he will tell his friends as well (not neccessarily to make fun of you, but he will very likely talk about it).

I see you are no better off than before you asked this question. Sorry about that. The reality is that you will be taking a risk approaching him. Thats unavoidable. Whether or not its worth it, and whether or not he will react in an immature way, you have to evaluate based on his personality. All I can say is that the odds are stacked against you in my opinion.

Good luck (and if you do ask him, let me know how it goes please).

Alright, I know most teenage boys have looked at/look at porn. I'm pretty positive, considering the fact he just got all these pay channels in his bedroom, that my boyfriend does. Will it ever get to the point where he is more attracted to the girls on the screen than he is me? And if that happens, is breaking up the only thing to do?

I know I'm nowheres near looking like any of those girls you'd see online.

It will never happen. No way at all. No guy becomes actually attracted to "the girls on the screen". They arent real, its just a way to satisy urges (for lack of a better word).

Girls tend to compare themselves a lot to the women in porn (there have been many similar questions before). There is absolutely nothing to worry about, guys have a very different mentality when it comes to porn (most guys anyway). And that whole porn addiction thing which people throw around a lot... never seen it happen. Every guy I have known in my life has looked at porn to some degree or another, and yet not one case of addiction.

My point: Dont worry about it.

hello. I am 13/f, 5'2 and i weigh about 138 pounds. Is that really overweigh? Also, what is the fastest most efficent way to lose weight other then the excerise and eat less? Is there a SPECIFIC exercise i should do everyday? -thanks ALOT

You dont sound overweight.

There is no specific exercise that will help you. Weight loss is a matter of eating fewer calories than you burn. That means that it comes down to the two things you listed... diet and exercise. The value of a specific exercise (e.g. crunches) is in the amount of calories they burn. Specific exercises, done alone, dont do much to help. What works are things like cardio, sports, weight lifting etc.

Now, you dont neccessarily need to eat less as such. Usually people dont eat right. You need to learn to eat a small balanced meal every 3-4 hours. Very few people do that. It will have a good effect on your metabolism, and will also give you more energy.

The short version is: 1.dont think so 2.eat smart 3.no

if u ask a question on advicentaors, will people know who's profile it came from?

Level 2 or higher mods can check to see who asked a question. As far as I gather, this usually tends to happen when the question is inapropriate.

The rest of us cannot see the profile.

I'm a teenage girl who is going to commit suicide today. No questions asked. I could never cut myself or jump off of a building- but I might be able to suffocate myself. But the problem with that would be that I don't know if I'd come back to consciousness with brain damage or not. Does suffocation cause brain damage? Or does it just kill you? Any quick and painless methods would be greatly appreciated.

Like everyone else said, no one is going to tell you how to kill yourself here. I can answer the one part of your question which is the suffocation part. To my knowledge (which is not extensive on this point), yes it can cause brain damage. I am telling you this so that it may act as a deterant.

I have to say that like the others I cant help but wonder why you posted this question. It is illogical. Surely you knew no one would answer it at face value. So you must have figured out that the majority of posts would tell you not to do it. This tells me that you dont really want to kill yourself. This posting is either a cry for help, or an attempt to get attention.

There is only so much of either you can get online. Talk to someone close to you and try to figure out what it is that you really want.

Good luck.

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