about

Hi I'm Dee. I'm 23 and married. I've worked in health care as well as office settings but am now a home-maker. I'm knowledgeable in a variety of subjects but don't mind doing a little research if asked about something I don't know about. Most of my friends come to me for advice. I read several advice columns and would like to help you also.

I'm not judgemental. Your life is yours to live it as you choose. I believe asking for advice is good, but ultimately the choice is yours. You WILL NOT find a hurtful or smartass answer here.

If you have a question that you would like to keep private, you can email me and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

advice

Hey so I have a boyfriend and hes really hot but I like him cause I like his personality. So my friend Allie kept on telling him to dump me and go out with her. She already has a boyfriend and I told him and we are both really pissed at her and we dont know what to do. Should I just ignore the fact that shes trying to steal my boyfriend or something else?

Thanks xo0ox

You call this girl a friend? Tell her a true friend wouldn't go after a friend's man and then kick her to the curb.

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okay well i cant seem to delete and get rid of my winamp or kodak easyshare completely...i have tried the add and remove programs...and for the winamp if i right click start it has stuff for it but if i go to it it says searching so its not there buttt how do i get it to go away? and also the kodak stuff i have tried to delete it sooo many times but it doesnt ever fully go away...and its taking up a lot of space...because when i try to delete it, it says access denied so i dunno can someone help me please? ill rate!
♥BLAiR

If it says access denied, then the program is proabably still active. Hit ctrl alt del to bring up your task manager, highlight winamp, then click the end process button. If it pops up a warning screen, click yes. Then delete all the winamp files. It should let you then.

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I heard that if you have six small meals a day, then you lose weight. If you do, what should you eat, and how often?

Thanks in advance!

What you heard is true. The reason it works is that it keeps your blood sugar levels balanced so there are no lows or highs that will cause you to crave more food. Also since you're eating every few hours, you don't feel hungry.

Usually you eat three balanced meals with three healthy snacks. I'll give you an example so you can see what I mean.

Breakfast-English muffin and peanut butter
Morning Snack-Graham crackers with a banana
Lunch-Ham and swiss sandwich
Afternoon Snack-Apple and cheese
Dinner-Steak fajitas
Evening Snack-Peaches with yogurt

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This may be a little long...Sorry.. but i really need to know what was meant... So.. The other night I was at my boyfriends house we were laying in bed watching a movie... and his friend showed up... and then his brother came in and was watching the movie with us... Well then they all started talking about getting their new cars.. well my boyfriend and his friend.. and his friend said that him and my boyfriend could pick up chicks.... well my boyfriend was like no way.. Ive got mine right here... and put his arm around me... well then his brother said that all Kevin (my boyfriend) would have to do was have me with him to pick up chicks.... So my question is... Was he saying that I'm Hot... Or was he saying that I was like a lesbian or something... I was really confused by what he said..

I think he was just saying that when the other girls saw you in the car with him, it would make them jealous so they'd want to pick him up. Haven't you realized yet that girls always tend to go after a guy that's already taken and vice versa?

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Hey, I'm taking AP Biology next school year, and the book is $92.00 in my high school office. I've searched a little bit online, but I can't find a cheaper price anywhere. Does anyone know where I can get this book cheaper? (Doesn't matter if it's new or used.) Thanks in advance, I'll rate 5's for anyone who can find something.
Nevaeh

Since you didn't list the name of the book, it makes it a little difficult to help you find it. Here are some sites that you may be able to find it at for a lower price.

http://www.textbooks.com/
http://www.directtextbook.com/
http://www.campusbooks.com/
http://www.classbook.com/
http://www.efollett.com/
http://www.varsitybooks.com/
http://www.bigwords.com/
http://www.textbookx.com/
http://www.swapbooks.com/

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I'm 14/f
I think im fat and I wanna lose weight. I don't eat breakfast or lunch and barely dinner. All my friends are worried about me and try to get me to eat but I just say i'm not hungry. My question is, is this that serious and that unhealthy? Thanks!

It sounds unhealthy and very serious to me. You are lucky to have friends that care enough to speak up about it. If you need help setting up a healthy diet that will allow you to eat and still lose weight, drop me a note in my inbox. I'll be glad to help.

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hey does anybody know any websites and/or any stores that sell real toe rings that like won't turn your toes green? and like between $50-$75 please and thanks

http://store.mytoering.com/index.html

Getting a ring that is real gold will keep from turning your toe green.

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you seem like you give really good advice so I was hoping you could help me out. I'm 11 and going to be 12 on september 9th. I am allowed to babysit although I hve never been hired to babysit alone. I am usually just a mothers help/ entertainer for the kids. I really need to make some money because there a lot fo things I want to buy that my parents don't find a nessacesity for them to buy. How can I make parents realize I am a responsible sitter. More importantly how can I find people within my town to babysit for
Please help I rate high

Thank you. I do try to help people as best I can.

I would suggest taking a few classes. CPR and First Aid classes are things I consider necessities for a babysitter. The American Red Cross also offers a babysitting training class which you might want to take. I babysit from time to time and I've made it a point to be certified in CPR and First Aid. I've also took a child development class. Ask at your school, local college, YMCA, or local American Red Cross chapter for class times. You can look up your local American Red Cross chapter at http://www.redcross.org/where/where.html

Taking these classes will show that you have a sincere interest in babysitting and that you're prepared for an emergency if it comes up. Trust me, parents want to know their children are safe when they leave them with someone else. This should also show your parents that you're responsible enough to be babysitting.

To find people around town to babysit for, I would suggest putting up flyers in locations where parents commonly go-the grocery store, church, the post office, the school, etc. Just make sure to ask first to be sure it's okay to hang up your flyer. Ask the parents you've worked for before as mother's helpers if they will give you a reference.

Make the poster eye-catching but don't go overboard. Make sure to list your name and phone number, hours and days you're available to babysit, experience you have (even if it's only babysitting your younger siblings or working as a mother's helper, these still count), the fact that you have references available upon request, classes you've taken that will help (CPR, First Aid, Babysitting), etc. Make sure you run a spell-check on it and have someone else read it just be sure it is error-free and clearly makes sense.

Before you get a job, I would suggest making a list of activities for different age groups so you're not at a loss for what to do. I also think it's a good idea to buy a binder so you can keep your schedule, information on the children you babysit, and activities in it.

When you do get a call about a job, make sure to ask the age(s) of the child(ren), general likes and disikes, any allergies, any medical conditions, any medications the child(ren) are on, house rules, bedtimes (if you will be one putting the child to bed), normal schedule, where you contact the parent in case of emergency, the number for the family doctor, etc.

I'm giving you a couple links on babysitting that you might find helpful. They offer forms, snack and activity ideas, games,
http://www.youthonline.ca/babysitting/
http://www.urbanext.uiuc.edu/babysitting/
http://abcteach.com/directory/babysitting/index.shtml
http://kidshealth.org/teen/school_jobs/jobs/babysit.html
http://www.safesitter.org/Babysitters.htm

I hope this helped. Good luck in your babysitting.

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i think this weekend my boyfriend and i will start having oral sex..i've never done it before but he has and he's had sex before....i don't wear thongs.. but yet i don't wear big grandma underwear..they're exactlylike thongs.. like with the strings around the hips and all.. but instead of the string up my ass, it's just all covered..i'm scared that his other girlfriends wore thongs and stuff and that when he sees i don't he'll think i'm like a looser or something...do you think it matters.....or do guys REALLY REALLY REALLY REALLY prefer thongs and totally hate like thekinda underwear i wear

I always thought it was a personal preference. Since you can't have oral sex with your underwear on anyway, I wouldn't worry about it. He'll be more worried about getting you out of them than what they look like.

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im going down, bc you anint around, my whole worlds upside down...

I'm Goin' Down by Mary J Blige.

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okay, im not sure if this belongs under illnesses, but... my friend has cancer, he is 22. well actually hes more of my boyfriends friend. well today he called me, and he told me that he just got out of the hospital, and he had a mini- stroke... well first off... whats a mini- stroke? isnt a stroke... a stroke????
well, he asked me to do a favor for him since he can barely talk (( his one side is completely numb )) but, the favor was to tell my bf about it... ok, so i can do that... but im just afraid of how my bf will react... i mean this is my bf's hero... and i dont know... i honestly dont think this guy has much time left... and i dont wanna tell my bf that, cus thats just rude, and im sure no one wants to hear that.
how do i tell my bf about all this, and what do when he reacts... what do i say to him? i know he'll start crying... and plus... when our friend does "go" how do i handle that... i have to cope with it myself, and try to help my bf with it. and when im under that much stress, and when someone i know passes away, i dont get upset, i get mad... and i dont show my feelings because i try and help everyone else first... and myself last. but i will eventually let it all out, and its 10xs worse... im just confused... im not sure why i do this, and if i do... everyone will be worried about me... and i dont want that to happen either.
please help me!

I am so sorry you're going through this. I've been there myself and I know it's not easy,

Ok first off to answer your question about what a mini-stroke is...it's pretty much the same thing as a stroke only the effects usually resolve within a couple hours compared to a regular stroke sometimes having life-time effects.

One thing to remember, not all cancers are fatal. I have a friend who was diagnosed with cancer a couple months ago and they were only giving her a couple weeks to live. As of her checkup last week, they're now saying she's beating it and can't figure out why.

Since this guy didn't mention that it was life-threatening, he may be one of these cases where the cancer is treatable or able to be removed surgically.

I would just tell your boyfriend that you have something to tell him and have him sit down. I have saw guys faint over bad news so it's good to make sure he's sitting. Tell him that the friend called you and explain what was said. Try not to inject your personal feelings into it as you worrying about it will make him worry. If your boyfriend does cry, then just hold him until he calms down and let him know that if he needs to talk, you will be there for him.

I'm giving you a couple links to look at. They offer a wealth of information on cancer as well as online support groups. Sometimes it's helpful to talk to someone who's been there before.

http://www.cancernews.com/support.html
http://www.cancer-info.com/
http://www.cancer.org/

From someone who used to hold things inside and now has the ulcer to prove it, you need to get your feelings out. It is not healthy to hold them in. Find someone that you can vent to or invest in a notebook so you can at least write stuff down. If you can't find anyone else to vent to, you can feel free to email me either here or at ncblondie@inbox.com. I'll be glad to talk to you and help you get through this.

If something does happen to your friend and I sincerely hope it doesn't, please go to one of these sites below. They are focused on getting worked through your grief and also offer online support groups.

http://www.groww.com/
http://www.griefnet.org/

I'll keep you, your boyfriend, and his friend in my prayers.

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ok well i used to have a canopy hanging in my room. it was one of those ones from claires that u have to put hooks in your ceiling. ok well now i have the hooks and i was thinking about using chinese food boxes. decorating them and putting lights in them and hanging them on the hooks. Does anyone have any suggestions on what kind of lights to use that are safe and wont catch the boxes on fire or have any other suggestions?

Something like Christmas lights should work. They generally don't get as hot as regular bulbs. Check the box to be sure though.

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can someone give me some break up songs or some songs that say your mad or something. please...i rate 5's.

Personally my mad song is "Break Stuff" by Limp Bizkit. My hubby knows when this song is playing he better stay out of my way because I'm pissed. LOL

As for breakup songs....

Lesson in Leaving-Jo Dee Messina
Bye Bye-Jo Dee Messina
Kiss This-Aaron Tippin
Shut Up and Drive-Chely Wright
Fuck It-Eamon
Fuck You Right Back-Frankie
There's More to Me than You-Jessica Andrews
Leave (Get Out)-Jojo
Break Down Here-Julie Roberts
The Trouble with Love-Kelly Clarkson
Wrong Again-Martina McBride
Love Hurts-Nazareth
Scars-Papa Roach
She Hates Me-Puddle of Mudd
Walk On-Reba McEntire
It Only Hurts When I'm Breathing-Shania Twain
Get Over Yourself-Shedaisy

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okay well i was wondering , you know how they have diff. color bracelets that mean stuff. well what color does annorexia mean? thnx //♥

Red bracelets represent anorexia, purple is for bulimia and black and blue is for self injury, such as cutting and self mutilation.

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well my boyfriend tells me im beautiful. its cute/sweet i know. but what should i say after? like can i say thanks? or something cute and unexpected. gimme ideas thnx //♥

It's perfectly fine to say thanks. I always went for the "awwww honey" response.

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How does anorexia harm you or your body? I know pukeing will stain your teeth but what else?? cuz if thats it, then whats the harm right?

Without treatment, up to twenty percent (20%) of people with serious eating disorders die.

If not stopped,eating disorders can lead to irreversible physical damage and even death. Eating disorders can affect every cell, tissue, and organ in the body. The following is a partial list of the medical dangers associated with anorexia nervosa.

-Irregular heartbeat, cardiac arrest, death

-Kidney damage, death

-Liver damage (made worse by substance abuse), death

-Destruction of teeth, rupture of esophagus, loss of muscle and bone mass

-Damage to lining of stomach; gastritis, gastric distress

-Disruption of menstrual cycle, infertility (see below)

-Delayed growth and permanently stunted growth due to undernutrition. Even after recovery and weight restoration, person may not catch up to expected normal height.

-Weakened immune system

-Icy hands and feet

-Swollen glands in neck; stones in salivary duct, "chipmunk cheeks."

-Excess hair on face, arms, and body

-Dry, blotchy skin that has an unhealthy gray or yellow cast

-Anemia, malnutrition. Disruption of body's fluid/mineral balance (electrolyte imbalance, loss of potassium; can be fatal)

-Fainting spells, seizures, sleep disruption, bad dreams, mental fuzziness

-Low blood sugar (hypoglycemia), including shakiness, anxiety, restlessness, and a pervasive itchy sensation all over the body.

-Permanent loss of bone mass, fractures and lifelong problems

-Anal and bladder incontinence, urinary tract infections, vaginal prolapse, and other problems related to weak and damaged pelvic floor muscles. Some may be related to chronic constipation, commonly found in people with anorexia nervosa. Structural damage and atrophy of pelvic floor muscles can be caused by low estrogen levens, excessive exercise, and inadequate nutrition. Surgery may be necessary to repair the damage.

And that's not including the emotional damage it can do!

JMO but I don't think I'd chance it.

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My little 8-year-old girl likes the TV show "Anne of Green Gables." We just moved to the Bay Area and I don't know what time it starts! Does anyone here know what time Anne of Green Gables comes on at the station "KQED" (San Francisco)? Because it would sure help me a lot!

From the KQED website, it looks like it comes on at 5 pm.

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i dont tan very while and i just wanted to know any good tanning oils that like actually work. i go tanning in the winter but it like doesnt seem to work! lol so any good tips on how to get tan? i have like fair skin

With fair skin you'll end up fried if you go too often, too long or use the wrong tanning lotion. Ask one of the girls at the salon you go to for their recommendation. They usually use the beds themselves so they'll know what would be best for your skin.

I'm extremely fair skinned but I've found if I start out laying short periods of time and use a tanning lotion that also has a little sunscreen in it, I can get tanned. I know it sounds weird to use a tanning lotion with sunscreen but it's better since it lets you get a tan gradually without burning. Once you get your tan started, you can switch to regular tanning lotion. I usually go every other day or twice a week and use a tanning lotion with coconut oil.

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Iam always nervous and deppressed no one around me like family,friends,stuff like that can tell. I have no brothers or sisters to help me,I'm scared of life to and of the devil I think I want a Theropist but I'm scared if I tell my parents i'll get in trouble and they wont belive me. I am 13 and female, I'm also scared of the fact of becoming one of those teens who get soo stressed they move things with there mind and don't even no it, and some of those kids become Excersist.

P.S. I'm that teen who is a Little too skinny.

You should tell your parents. I doubt you'll get in trouble. More likely, they'll appreciate your maturity in coming to them when you realized you had a problem.

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I am a 22 year old stay at home mom to 2 little girls. Ages 3 and 18 months. My house always lookslike a cyclone has just passed through no matter how much I go behind everyone a clean. Lately, I have felt so unappreciated and just don't have the urge or the energy to keep the house clean like I want to. Sometimes I make myself get up and start cleaning, but within a few minutes I'm back on the couch or in front of the computer avoiding the work that needs done. Anyone have any advice on something I can do to motivate myself to get this place spic and span like I want it and keep it that way???

Ok first of all with two small kids, you're going to drive yourself nuts if you expect your house to be spotless. If anyone says anything about your house, leave the kids with them for a couple hours and dare them to keep a house spotless.

With that said, try breaking up the cleaning into parts. You don't have to pick up every little toy as soon as it gets put down. Start with the kitchen or wherever you want and work on getting that area clean. Then take a short break before moving onto the next room. By breaking it into smaller parts and giving yourself breaks, the job won't seem so overwhelming.

Try restricting the area the kids can get into. That will help keep the mess concentrated to one area while still leaving other areas clean.

If you have an significant other, get them to help. Something as simple as playing with the kids or giving them a bath so you can be able to clean without worrying about what the kids are into will help.

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