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Okay so my 16 year old boyfriend dumped me in a text message four days after he guilted me into giving him head. (I'm fourteen). Yeah I know it was stupid and trust me, I regret it, and I'm not going to try and explain how I felt because no one can really understand it...
But anyway. So now we're broken up and I'm hearing some really awful things he's said about me (while we were dating and presently). And I really don't understand why he's doing this... Because I've done nothing to hurt him. I haven't screamed or yelled or made a scene or tried to get people to hate him or turn his friends against him (even though his best friend, we'll call him Pete, took my side after the break up, I never asked Pete to and my ex had been treating him like shit before that anyway). Well my ex and Pete are kiiind of still friends and he's been telling me all the horrible thing my ex has said. Like while we were dating my ex told his baseball team about how far we'd been and that he "had me so whipped" and that you gotta "keep your girl on a leash" and what not. The second part doesn't bother me so much as the first because my ex always promised me that stuff would stay between us... See, our schools baseball team is horrible. They act like girls exist to do what they want and they constantly pressure each other to try and get head or get sex and its disgusting, it really is. Well my ex told them all about me giving him head and the baseball team told the football team and the football team tells everyone else and now goodness... everyones talking about it because my reputation before this was "innocent good girl" and thats trashed now...
I talked to my ex and he's like "no one is judging you, we dated for six months" yet I'm having guys come up to me and ask if I will "put out for them too" or "if I knew you were down for this stuff I would of gone after you a long time ago" and its disgusting and I hate it!!! I know it's true but those kind of things are supposed to stay between you and your boyfriend and he promised me they would. I talked to him. He said he'd tell people he was lying but we know that's not gonna happen. And guess what else I found out??
He's been telling people we've had sex too. Now, that, is NOT true. And he's saying the most disgusting things like "yeah I was on top and I was scared I was gonna break her cause she's so tiny. But she was great, she let me do whatever I want. I could of put it up the ass if I'd wanted to" and I just don't even know what to do... I hate having everyone talk about me like this... I regret giving him a blow job SO MUCH. He just... at the time he made me feel so horrible for not giving him one. And i knew it was wrong but the things he said made sense to me at the time... I just, I don't know... I can't explain it. I know it's not an excuse. But he would say things like "it's been six months, don't you trust me enough to do this?" or, "you don't even want to try to make me happy" and I started believing all of this stuff... I just let him walk all over me and I started thinking it was okay. I just want my reputation back. I don't want to be known for this...
I know I don't deserve it. And I especially don't deserve the sex rumor. I just don't know what to do... My ex denies saying anything to anyone when I try to talk about it with him but I know he's lying. He says he'll tell people that the rumors aren't true but I can't trust him to do that. I just don't know what to do... :( Help.
Please, I'm begging you, don't judge me for doing what I did... If you knew how I felt at the time... Just so low and useless... I don't know. Please just tell me how I can handle this.
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Wow, what a jerk. There is nothing really you can do about people saying anything but ignore them. Which is reaaallly hard, but you know that.
It will blow over eventually and you learned from your mistake. You know the truth so should your best friends. If someone says something to you be like, "We never did that" And walk away, it will always effect you but if you don't show it, the people will get tired of bugging you about it.
Of course there are still the really immature people there who probably won't let it go. That's when you let it go.
If it gets totally out of hand then talk to your parents or school counselor. Good luck!
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Iv'e noticed whenever i'm showering and shaving my legs i get dizzy and my body starts to sway back and forth like i'm going to faint..i become light headed i usually eat before i shower so i don't go into the shower on a empty stomach when this happens i get worried cause there's a possiblity i could faint while showering...
Why is this happening to me? Should i
tell my parents and my doctor? What can
i do so this doesn't happen anymore?
I know that most of you aren't doctors
but any advice would be helpful... (link)
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That happens to me also. I have to sit down while I shave or I'll get dizzy. I'm thinking it could be the hot water cause I feel that way once I step out as well. It could be the blood flow cause it rushes when you bend forward.
But if sitting down doesn't help tell your parents and see what they say. Good luck!
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my boyfriend broke up with me about 3 weeks ago. We recently started talking and hanging out a little bit.We hungout like three days during the school week but we didnt even speak the whole weekend.The times we hungout ,we had fun and had a good time. I just really want to get back together with him ,but he said he needed time. Do some guys really actually need time or do they just say that? I obviously don't want to wait my whole life for him to come back.What key things should i say? Ive never went through this before : ( (link)
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Well, we don't actually know if he meant it or not. I mean, all guys are different so he could just be saying that as an excuse or he could actually mean it. Give him time though, but don't wait around. Like if he wants to talk to you about it again, then let it come, if he doesn't don't be the one waiting by the phone and thinking about only him forever. You know what I mean. Find some stuff to do while he is gone, hang out with friends. Enjoy being single for awhile till he is ready. Just don't let yourself wait forever.
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(20yr old female)
I like a guy (Kevin). I have been talking to him for a couple of years now, though I never met him in person yet. It has been inconvenient to meet with him, and I have parents who are trying very much to protect me and dont allow me to meet with guys at all (unless they have met him and have gotten to know him).
I am in a relationship with a guy (Qua'Nell). He has been my friend for a while and has always hoped for a more than friend relationship with me. He is really sweet. I have hung out with him without my parents knowing, and eventually we arranged for him to come over to meet my parents, which he did.
I am going out with him because for a period of time I had thought that Kevin didnt like me anymore and was avoiding talking to me. So I told Qua'Nell about how I was sad about that. And he seemed he was waiting for a similar opportunity so that some other guy wouldnt be keeping me from being with him.
I like him alot as a friend, and I have felt some romantic feelings toward him and we kissed when we hung out; so I decided to say yes to him asking if we could be boyfriend and girlfriend now. I thought it would be best to move on and not dwell on Kevin, and I thought being in a relationship with Qua'Nell would make me happy.
But, like, the next day after I said yes to Qua'nell, Kevin texts me and apologizes for not getting back to me sooner. I told him I felt like he didnt like me much anymore, and he said that was not the case.
So now I know that the guy I rreally want does also want me still... but I am in a relationship with Qua'Nell, and he is such a sweetheart and I would hate to hurt him with a break-up. I want to see Kevin and I think we could do that soon, but it would be wrong. And I'm not sure if my friendship with Qua'Nell will be preserved after I break up with him.... Or maybe it would be wrong to even talk to him while I'm with Kevin.....
What should I do and how should I do it...?? (link)
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In my own opinion, I'd stay with your current boyfriend. If you do have feelings for him and he cares about you, then why leave him for some guy you haven't met yet. You have known him for awhile but what if when you do meet this guy, he's not all he's cut out to be?
Then you lost your relationship with this nice guy and the other guy is a jerk?
That's not always the case but you never know what happens.
This is all your choice though. If you really don't want to be with this guy, then don't be with him.
I hope everything works out for you!
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A while back, i was dating this guy exclusively, but we didn't call it a relationship. as time went on, he became more distant. he started bailing on plans multiple times a week, and basically only texted me to tell me he was too busy to hang out again, or to try to see me if it was friday or saturday night. i tried everything to deal with it, i suggested we study together if he was too busy to do anything else, i tried being more present in his life, then less, finally tried to detach myself completely. when that failed, i realized he didn't care about me and ended it. he said that after 4 months, he still couldn't be emotionally invested because i'm going abroad next year.
it's been a month, and i tried to move on. i met someone new who's wonderful, but we're taking it slow. last weekend, my ex saw us together and expressed to my roommate how upsetting it was for him. if i thought he cared enough to be jealous, i probably wouldn't have ended it in the first place. if we want to be together, it seems silly for my pride to get in the way, but i just don't know what to do. as of now, he's given me no reason to think he cares about me at all. should i wait for him to express it to me directly? should i initiate some conversation? (link)
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You found someone so much better. Just because this guy was jealous doesn't mean he is right for you. You realized he didn't care enough for you to really love you. He's only jealous. You shouldn't get back together with someone because of that. I mean, those problems are still there. What makes you think they won't go away when you guys get back together?
He would still be that same guy who would blow you off for something else.
If you really do want to get back together with him, see what he does. If he wants you he'd try to get you. But you'd have to talk about what happened, if nothing changes, its not worth it and you're not gonna be happy.
My own opinion is to forget about this guy. Good luck!
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like i love my girlfriend with all my heart but its hard 4 me to trust her but i really do love her but anyways my girlfriend been bringing up dis new guy that goes to her school and shes like he annoying and stuff but i believe she keep thinking about him because she likes him cause like she saids he is annoying when he is not evening doing anything to her and he doesnt even talk to her so i believe she likes him but she wont tell me i ask her lots of times and she gets all mad saying i only love you and i only want you i really need some help and no disrespect but please dont say if you really love her you should believe her i cant cuz it doesnt add up :( (link)
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Talk to her again. But don't ask her this time. Tell her that if she does like him, you'll be ok with it. Even if you won't. You want to know if she really wants to be with you or not, then she'll choose. If she chooses you, she probably loves you more and that other guy was just a crush and not worth her time.
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F/13
I just met a new friend this year. I thought she was amazing. Except she is kinda strange b/c she dresses emo and goth but says she's not. She also is OBSESSED with tokio hotel and hellboy. And it gets sooooooo anoying b/c she talks about them all the time. So she also told me in the beginning of the year that alot of ppl turn on her b/c they think she's wierd and gets really mean. And I was like "that could never happen with us. Well be friends forever." boy was I wrong. We always had fights. One day we'd be friends and then the next we'd be enemies. So one day I was walking home with my friend and he asked to have her number. I told him I'd have to ask her first. So the next day I was joking around and told her I gave him her number. So then she said.....and I quote....."so I don't care" so then I gave it to him. Then the next day she was all mad at me. Cussing me out, talking about me behind my back, pushing me out of her way in the halls. She just is such a jerk. Then one time....since she's obsessed with tokio hotel I was telling her that bill looked like a girl. So then she says "OMG NO HE DOESNT!!!!! If he looks like a girl then that means you look like a boy." so then our friend Mariah told her the EXACT SAME THING. And then she replies "I kno seriously. He needs to change his image" and I was standing there lik WTF So what should I do???????should I stay friends with the basterd or try to fix the friendship?????? (link)
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You could find better friends. Friends that will treat you right. First try talking to her and explain everything without arguing. If you don't think you can do it without getting into another fight, just don't do it. If you do talk to her and nothing changes, go find better friends. If you decide not to talk to her at all, then do the same thing. Don't be a total jerk to her, you can keep her in your life if you want but keep distance. Find some better friends that you'll be happy with.
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well me and my boyfriends broke up a while ago (still friends) and resently i have been recieving some mix signals.
the probs is i keep having dreams about him, this has never happened befor but has been ongoing since last week.
last night i had a dream we were talking and suddenly he puts his arm around me. in my head i was like , if any one saw us what would they think. We walked into class and he sat infront of me and put his feet on the desk. i said "gross no" and he put them down i laughed and said im kidding its fine, he smiled then i woke up.
what does this mean??? (link)
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He's still in your life. He's still your friend. You're going to have dreams about him. Probably alot more coming. This happens to me after break ups. You guys are still friends so you didn't end badly right? So I think you still have some feelings for him. You probably will for awhile. So that's probably why you're having these dreams. Missing him pretty much.
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theres this girl in my school. She is very pretty and wear gorgous clothes. Her and I talk a little and she and me have a great sense of humor. I dont want to sound desperate but i kinda want to be her best friend. I mean my old friends are sorta not the kind you wanna be around with. Is there any way I can be friends with and even maybe best friends? (link)
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If you want to be friends with someone, be yourself. Don't act like a fake cause don't you want people to like you for you? You probably knew that already, but just a heads up.
But honestly, if you really want to be friends with someone be nice, helpful, and talk to her. Don't go over the top because like you said you don't want to be desperate.
Start off with being friends and if you guys get along well then say you guys should hang out sometime.
You might want to get to know her first before deciding if she would be a good friend for you. Just cause she's pretty and wears nice clothes doesn't mean she's all that nice. Just warning. But just start off with talking and it goes from there.
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hey,
i have a boyfriend but he doesnt really act like my boyfriend. What do i do?
Help Me (link)
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If you have already tried talking to him about it and he hasn't changed, he isn't worth it. If you haven't talked to him about it. Talk to him. If you guys can't work it out and he still doesn't treat you right. Leave him. It isn't worth it.
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I'm 13 and i cut myself,drink, suffer from depression, and have suicidal thoughts. i need help but i don't want to speak to anyone because no one knows. and i want to stop without some one even knowing i had this. how do i do this?? (link)
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I started cutting when I was 12. So I know where you are at and everything. You know you need help. I didn't want to talk to anyone either. But that didn't get me anywhere. It just doesn't work like that. Find someone you can trust and talk to them. If you need support tell a friend then go to an adult who can get you help. You would end up so much better.
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on facebook and ur friends list, what are the mutual friends? i have no idea what they are, and how to be one (link)
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When your friend is friends with the same friends that you have.
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i need help. there is a boy in school and we never met i am home schooled and so is he. we had a live lesson and at the end is student chat he wants to be my bf. i didn't know at first and now i do want to be his gf. i have sent him messages that i want to be his gf over the past 2 weeks. he is not answering me. what can i do i want and need a bf i am desperate what should i do right now i just sent him 3 messages today already. i need help. (link)
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Well even if you are desperate. Just don't act like it. You've sent him enough messages already. He'll eventually get them and if he realizes you stopped he might reply back. He was into you, so just give it some time. If it happens it happens. Good luck!
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15/f
i'm in a very difficult situation. my best friend is a guy, he's my age, and i have known him my entire life. he truly is like a brother to me. we went to grade school together, grew up together, and now we go to different high schools, but we're still good friends. recently, i started talking to his brother more. his brother is an 8th grader, and he was considering coming to the high school that i go to. we got to be very close over the past few months. i started to have feelings for him, even though i know i shouldn't. he's an extremely smart and sweet guy, and a perfect gentleman. he's honestly more mature than his older brother. he just turned 14. about 3 days ago, he told me that he likes me. so i told him i liked him too. we've literally been talking nonstop since, only stopping to sleep. but i'm afraid if i do anything about this, i'm either going to hurt his older brother, my best friend, or i'm going to get hurt bc of the age difference. help me? (link)
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Well if you are so worried about hurting your best friend or her brother then talk to them. Tell them you've been starting to like their brother and see what they say. Honestly, they should be happy for you and maybe push you for it. But if they don't, they'll probably get use to the two of you. It's not their choice who you like. But you should tell them first. Good luck!
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Me and my bestfriend get in fights over the most stupid things! At first I think she's joking, but then I can see she's not! I really love her as my friend, but the fights make MY life worse! What should I do? (link)
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First talk to her. Tell her you love her as a friend but you guys gotta be able to talk to each other without getting into arguments.
Try figuring out why she gets upset about things so easily.
Whenever you guys do start to argue or get mad just stop. Change the subject or something. Eventually it'll get more normal. But just watch what you say for awhile and see what happens.
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im a 14 year old girl and i overeat.
im not fat or anything. actually, everyone says im skinny.
however, everyday, when i get home from school, i cant help myself but to finish a whole pack of oreos, cookies, chocolate, or potstickers. usually it's something sweet, but some of the other types of foods have the same effect on me.
my mom says that it's normal for girls my age to want to eat a lot, especially around the time of my peried or if im stressed about schoolwork. but it's not just CERTAIN days for me. it's EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. i don't overeat because of stress or hormones. i simply have a major sweet tooth. i love food.
i dont want this habit to continue. i may be skinny now, but in a couple of years, that certainly may not be the case if i continue to binge.
im not the type to become anorexic or bulimic either. i simply love food too much to stop eating altogether. and it doesnt have to be what i like. i hate peanuts, but when there's no other food around, i could eat that until i empty the can if im in that mood (which is pretty often).
anybody have any tips on how to control this habit?
(without buying pills or anything. just natural, home remedies that i can practice to make myself a have more self control when it comes to eating. i really dont want to have to resort to professional help.) (link)
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I'm 15 and I'm the same way. I'm not as bad as I was before though. My metabolism is fast but its slowing down now. I kinda had to make it a goal for myself. I'd get home and I eat whenever I'm bored. I mean, its not like a meal where you get full right?? So its so easy to grab it and eat it.
Try getting rid as much as the sweet stuff in your house. Not by eating it though :P.
Exercise too whenever you can too. You're not as hungry afterward either.
Try drinking more water and juice.
So whenever you see yourself going to get food, start off with healthier foods. Its better to be eating that than all those sweets. You might eventually get bored of healthy stuff anyway and probably won't eat as much.
Good luck!
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i have this best friend she likes this one boy but he rather be with me i dont mean in a love kind of way he already told her he didnt like her so now she gets mad when he talks to me and she keeps asking me if i like him i told her no but she wont let it go and she even started saying that he likes me iv told her to drop it but she keeps picking at it and i dont know what to do cause i dont like him and i dont think he likes me what do i do stop[ talking to him but if i do he might try harder to talk to me and get her even more mad what do i do (link)
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I get how she would be upset but I mean if you don't hate him and or anything then it doesn't mean you have to stop talking to him just cause your friend gets mad because she had liked him and he likes you. That same thing happened with me and I'm pretty good friends with the guy now, he is still into me and everything but we're friends. Just calmly sit with your friend and tell her that you don't like him but its not gonna be any problem if you talk to him because that's their problem, not yours. You should have every right to talk to him anyway you know? So good luck!
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First i am going to give a little info. about me nd my past.
since i was young i was always picked on by my dad for example he always called me fat, talked about how my room is dirty and always over exaggerating about it. Every time my mom did something wrong or do something he dont like he yells at me about and he tells me i am a good 4 notin 2 something like that. i dont be doing anything he just lash out at me. I've been depressed all of my life. One time i asked my can i go to the person who you would go to to tell them your problems. she told why go to them if i can talk to her. i dont want to tell her she is one of my problems i've been having. for some reason i tried to commit suicide by hanging my self but there wasn't anything to hang myself with. i tried jumping but i am scared of heights. I remember that day, i put everything in front of the door the bed and the dresser, i looked down i couldn't do it. i used to picture myself jumping in front of a car when it go past, but i could i was watching kids so i didn't want them have bad dreams about it. i was a suicidal who couldn't commit suicide. funny aint it. anyways i am 18 years old and i feel like i am a slave - my mom would call me over to where she is to do something for her, i would ask how come u didnt ask so and so, she would say that person wont do it right. i am being called sorry because i dont feel like doing something. i do not have job nor money to move out. i have no friends since the friends i had turned out to be fake friends ( also my dad really reminds me that i dont have any friends when i say i want a phone he use to say that you only need a certain min. because i dont have any body to talk to but my mom, that was so wrong) i just dont have anything going for me. the only things i do is read and watch thing that is online and watch porn. other than that i dont do anything. i just stay in my room. also i am a shy person, i dont talk to a lot of people because of my speech problem, i am so used to being talked about by my looks that i think every body will talk about in front of me or behind my back. how can i get a way from t this mess? i have nothing going for me. i keep on asking myself why am i here. what should i do can someone please help me. i am very lonely, i have no friends and no boyfriend to go to. i am fed up with this life. so what should i do? (link)
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I was pretty much the same way. Suicide isn't gonna do anybody any good. You should know that though, I'm pretty sure you do.
My dad is the same way. He means well but he doesn't know how much it hurts. My dad had found out about me cutting myself and I had almost went to the end and ever since then I was called crazy and stupid by my family. You could try getting help. I mean really, suicide isn't the way to go at all. You have to think about others in that situation, you know? You do have things going for you. You have to make it that way. Pretty much, everything is a choice, most of the time. I had so many problems, alot like yours. But I realized that wasn't the reason why I was so depressed. It was because I thought about the problems too much. I just decided not to think about it. I mean yeah, every once in awhile I'd break down and cry. Don't bottle it up though. If you need to talk find someone to talk to.
But I mean, it was things I couldn't change. I can't change my parents and how they treated me so I decided to not think about it. I mean thinking about it is only gonna make me more depressed and its not doing anyone any good at all. So I found other things to look for in life. I'm gonna have a future. I mean, I'm not gonna live here forever.
We aren't an accident, obviously. Trust me, you don't want to be another statistic for teen suicide. There is always a reason for every problem you have. In the future you're gonna meet someone or even your kids might have some problems. You would be one of the people who could show them that they could make it. Especially with your life, you would be a pretty good example.
Just think about it, and think smart about it.
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I am fourteen, and my best friend has been really mean to me, she punches me in the stomach, pressure points me, squeezes my arm, and it's her way to take out her anger!! The other day she broke into my other best friends locker and tried to steal her gum! I don't want to rat her out, but I need to get her controlled!!
She rammed her violin into me because I didn't give her the answers to our math test! I told her she needs to figure it out, it's your test. Was i right about doing that? Should I remain friends with her? What do I tell her? How do I tell her? Please help me!! (link)
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Well, before you go to anyone else. Try talking to her about it. Tell her how you feel about it and ask her if she would stop. If she does, then that's great. It might not be easy at first for her, because of habits but if you see her trying, she's making an effort. If she doesn't stop, you need to distance yourself or even back out of the friendship. You don't want to keep getting hurt. Just calmly talk to her about it. Good luck!
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i've never been in a relationship,but i am now for my first time.We haven't been together very long but my expectations were higher than I thought.My boyfriend isn't like most boyfriends I see or hear about. He doesn't call me to talk on the phone,we don't hangout everyday,he texts me a little bit but not that much and i usually have to make the plans when we hangout (since I drive).He is a very busy guy,but still he could atleast text me to say goodnight.whenever we text at night,it usually just results in him not answering because he fell asleep ,instead of him saying goodnight.He doesn't really say cute stuff often but before we were going out,he would offer to buy me lunch and be really nice and since we started going out and doing sexual things (not sex!) he's changed.Don't get me wrong,he IS a nice guy.He hasn't done anything mean to me ,i just kinda feel a little neglected at times ...but is this normal since it's a new building relationship? (link)
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My first "real" relationship was like that. Exactly the same way. Wouldn't be very cute with me but was still really nice to me. We'd hang out but not too often. We didn't talk everyday. We lasted 3 months through that then realized it wasn't worth it. We both noticed that, we were both really shy about it. So it might be the same way? If you want to save this one talk to him, communication is the only way you know what he's thinking and its what you want. Bring it up, if not, its definitely not worth it.
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