Free AdviceGet Free Advice
Home | Get advice | Give advice | Topics | Columnists | - !START HERE! -
Make Suggestions | Sitemap

Get Advice


Search Questions

Ask A Question

Browse Advice Columnists

Search Advice Columnists

Chat Room

Give Advice

View Questions
Search Questions
Advice Topics

Login

Username:
Password:
Remember me
Register for free!
Lost Password?

Want to give Advice?

Sign Up Now
(It's FREE!)

Miscellaneous

Shirts and Stuff
Page Backgrounds
Make Suggestions
Site News
Link To Us
About Us
Terms of Service
Help/FAQ
Sitemap
Contact Us


depression


Question Posted Wednesday April 7 2010, 10:32 pm

I'm 13 and i cut myself,drink, suffer from depression, and have suicidal thoughts. i need help but i don't want to speak to anyone because no one knows. and i want to stop without some one even knowing i had this. how do i do this??

[ Answer this question ]
Want to answer more questions in the Sexual Health and Reproduction category?
Maybe give some free advice about: General Sex Questions?


charmedp04 answered Friday April 9 2010, 1:50 pm:
please please get help!

[ charmedp04's advice column | Ask charmedp04 A Question
]




CelticAutumn answered Thursday April 8 2010, 7:54 pm:
You need to build friendship with some people...you don't necessarily tell them quite yet, but in a team or activity can boost confidence. For someone who is 13 it might be hard, but middle-school is socially harder than high school. I used to be shy until I had started debate/forensics...which you need to learn to conquer your fears. Let me try and put this into logic...if you feel you have hit rock bottom...you have nothing more to lose right? So why not...
Another thing is you can start writing start painting or drawing abstractly...what are zones, the chasms, the terrain of your mind.

One thing that helps is if you pretend to talk to someone...think loud in your head or even speak it when your alone...let it out and know your loved even if you prefer to suffer in silence.

Eventually you will need to talk to others...but you will not be all that afraid.

[ CelticAutumn's advice column | Ask CelticAutumn A Question
]



solidadvice4teens answered Thursday April 8 2010, 12:42 am:
This isn't something you can solve all alone. It's neurological in nature and a disease (depression) with symptoms (cutting, suicidal thoughts etc.) It needs a psychiatrist who can provide monitoring, medication and get you well again.

You're very sick mentally right now and that's not being said to hurt you. I know from experience and seeing people with these types of disorders. The hardest part is telling someone but you have got to or it will get worse. It can't be fixed without professional help.

As a child you grew up knowing one thing above all was important. You knew never to keep icky secrets or anything affecting your well-being to yourself. That's why you need to release this.

Nobody will be angry at you at all and your parents LOVE you and will always help you and you can bet that's the truth here. Never feel ashamed as much of this problem isn't in your control or because of your doing.

If talking to them directly is hard write it out on paper and leave it on the breakfast table for them asking for them to take the next step in helping you. You can also do that with a teacher, principal, counselor, friend's parents, aunt's, uncles or whomever you think will listen.

AA has a program for teens with drinking problems and you could get support there but need to deal with the mental health issues first.

No psychiatrist would ever put you in ANY hospital ward EVER unless they felt you were A) delusional B) of harm to yourself or others or B) unable to function at all (temporarily) so don't fear seeing one.

The thing is there's no way to handle your problems without the help of others or other people knowing as the solution is harder than that and involves more.

What you should do is go to an emergency room (yes it's indeed an emergency) and tell them what's been going on (be brutally honest) and have their on call psychiatrist access you for depression and other disorders bipolar etc that may be triggering the thoughts and depressed feelings.

What they'll do is come up with a plan for how to treat your illness and likely put you on medication and send you home unless you're as I said not in full control. You haven't a thing to lose by telling people you have this problem but a whole lot to gain. Why continue suffering in silence?

[ solidadvice4teens's advice column | Ask solidadvice4teens A Question
]



kiran answered Thursday April 8 2010, 12:31 am:
I started cutting when I was 12. So I know where you are at and everything. You know you need help. I didn't want to talk to anyone either. But that didn't get me anywhere. It just doesn't work like that. Find someone you can trust and talk to them. If you need support tell a friend then go to an adult who can get you help. You would end up so much better.

[ kiran's advice column | Ask kiran A Question
]



ConfusedX2 answered Thursday April 8 2010, 12:29 am:
I love reading postsecret every week, and it promotes the hotline 1-800-SUICIDE. it's free and open 24/7
also, read www.postsecret.com
youd be surprised how many people are experiencing the same thing you are.

[ ConfusedX2's advice column | Ask ConfusedX2 A Question
]



Lola answered Thursday April 8 2010, 12:26 am:
When i was about your age, i had suicidal tendencies too, and i used to be so depressed, and i had those angry thoughts and i held grudges against people, and at times i thought i was losing my mind. And i couldn't tell my parents cause i didn't want anyone to know.
But i did tell my school counseller, and he really used to listen to me, and sometimes i even wrote him letters expressing how i felt and my thoughts, and he'd read them, and follow up with me, like he was my private shrink,and it felt good, something i looked forward to. You know sometimes, its not just about someone telling you some advice for you to stop doing what your doing, but its about someone you regularly talk to, and whenever you feel upset, he'd be there for you, so it makes you feel like your not alone and that there is someone there for you, and that makes you feel good, that alone makes you feel like your improving, makes you want to do what you do less, cause this person encourages you when you look forward to talking to this person again, and you share with him how you've improved or how your changing.
So it doesn't have to be a family member,and it can't be a shrink, because your too young and then you'd need to tell your parents, so it could be a friend, or a counseller in your school, or sometimes there are those hotlines for advice. You just need to talk to someone, you need to know that someone is there for you, cause this is what will make you feel better and encourage you to stop what your doing.
And in the meanwhile, try to occupy your time, like pick up a sport, or some activity, online or in real life, or focus on your studies more. Find something you like to do, what about art or music? Usually when you like something, or you have something that you do and takes up your time, it distracts you, and thats exactly what you need.

[ Lola's advice column | Ask Lola A Question
]

More Questions:

<<< Previous Question
Next Question >>> yeast & bacterial infection..

Recent popular questions:
Want to give advice?

Click here to start your own advice column!

What happened here with my gamer friends?

All content on this page posted by members of advicenators.com is the responsibility those individual members. Other content © 2003-2014 advicenators.com. We do not promise accuracy, completeness, or usefulness of any advice and are not responsible for content.

Attention: NOTHING on this site may be reproduced in any fashion whatsoever without explicit consent (in writing) of the owner of said material, unless otherwise stated on the page where the content originated. Search engines are free to index and cache our content.
Users who post their account names or personal information in their questions have no expectation of privacy beyond that point for anything they disclose. Questions are otherwise considered anonymous to the general public.

[Valid RSS] eXTReMe Tracker