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Recently I've been feeling quite empty and I have cut myself on my leg with a razor. There's a lot of them. The problem is that my boyfriend is coming over in a couple of days and if he sees them he will flip, maybe even break up with me. Don't get me wrong, he's really understanding, but he thought I wouldn't be stupid enough to do it. Also I lied and told him that I wouldn't do it. I NEED to get rid of them NOW. Any suggestions as to what I can do? Bearing in mind these are fresh cuts and they they haven't yet started healing. Any advice would be much appreciated, thanks. (link)
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There is no way to get rid of a cut. This is your body and it heals the way it wants to. You really have no control over this situation.
You need to seek professional help though. Self harm is a serious issue that needs to be stopped. It's better to just solve the problem rather than hide it and risk losing relationships over it. There are people who went through years of schooling to help you with your problems and help you find better ways to deal with what you're feeling (or what you're not feeling).
If your boyfriend breaks up with you over this, he's not worth your time and obviously not as understanding as you're thinking.
I just want to add that you shouldn't be with someone who will flip out over this.
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I am a 14 year old female. About a week ago I developed a sore throat, followed by a really bad cough. I had a bit of a runny nose but nothing unlikely. I didn't think much of it untill in the course of being sick I got a really bad sore throat. It felt unbearable. I went to school and in my health class we started talking about STDS and stuff. Where there I was informed that if your partner has HIV and you perform oral you can get throat cancer. A few days before I got my sore throat I had given my boyfriend a blow job. From there I became skeptical about throat cancer.. I don't think my boyfriend has HIV but I'm not sure. i don't drink or smoke or anything that can trigger throat cancer but it has almost been 2 weeks and I have another sore throat that I can't handle anymore. It is so painful it hurts to eat, swallow, even drink water. It feels bruised. Please help! This is keeping me up all night and I can't take it, it hurts way too much. (link)
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Well none of us are doctors so you're coming to the wrong place for medical issues.
Honestly, there could be many reasons why you have a sore throat. So it's best to talk to a doctor about it and they'll be able to tell you what you have and then give you medication to fix the problem.
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Hello! I'm 16/female, just in case you needed that piece of information in order to answer.
Ok, so I've been realizing more and more that the people around me are getting depressed and thinking about killing themselves lately, and its making me really curious. Of course there are the common reasons, stress, depression, and schizophrenia, but what are all of the reasons why people commit suicide? Or self harm? I just want to know if I'm missing something here...
Don't worry, I'm not one of those dumbasses. I'm an extremely happy and grateful person. I'm just completely confused...
I appreciate all answers that come my way in advance, and have a wonderful day everyone :) (link)
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There are so many reasons why people commit suicide or self harm. They aren't dumbasses.
It's hard to understand things when you've never gone through it. It's obviously something you don't ever want to go through. I've never had depression, but I did take classes in psychology and learned a lot about disorders and such so it helped me understand those people.
For the majority, it's a chemical imbalance in the brain and that causes depression. If they don't seek help, they just think that's the only way out.
Some people think the situation they're in just won't go away and they think suicide is the only way out.
You'll hear stories of kids being bullied due to being gay, overweight, a certain race, ect and they end up hating themselves and don't even want to live because they don't like themselves.
You'll find many, many stories of what people go through. Some people go through traumatic things that you wouldn't even imagine and it really traumatized them to wear they just can't live normally and they see no reason to live anymore.
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Hi 13/m..
So im at an international school and there is this kid my age that really gets on my nerves..he insults me and my friends..we already told the principal he got suspended once or twice, we also insult him back this year cause we dont have anything else to do..he has no friends which is probably the cause..he insulted on of my close friends yesterday and she felt very bad..I feel like beating him up but i dont want to get expelled, suspension for me is fine but not an expulsion! (link)
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Like Zane said, beating him up isn't going to do anything at all but get you expelled.
I'd also have to agree that you might want to try being nice. If that doesn't work, then you are just going to have to ignore him. You can also keep telling the principal and he'll keep getting expelled and hopefully by then he'll be sick of getting suspended so many times.
Insulting him won't do anything either. It just makes you just as bad as him and it'll probably make him want to do it more.
You're going to meet people like this throughout your life. You're really going to dislike them but you can't do the same thing back because it's not the mature thing to do and just makes you just as childish as they are.
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Hi, I'm a sixteen year old girl, around 98 pounds, no health issues. I have severe health anxiety and depression problems. I go through left arm pain sometimes, and it scares the crap out of me! I always think its because of a heart attack. I'm having no chest pain, very light arm pain. It comes and goes. No shortness of breath, no sweating, no "sense of doom" . My shoulder and arm just ache for a minute then goes away after I stop thinking about it. Also goes away after I sleep. Do you think there's a reason to worry, or should I continue to ignore it? (I have been to the doctor and she said my heart sounded fine and I have normal blood pressure) (link)
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Well I'm no doctor and most people on this site are not so we can't really give you a straight and direct answer.
Are you on medication for anxiety and depression? If not, get on that and see what happens.
If you are, then you should go see a doctor again and tell them about your arms pain. They should give you something to help for that.
Because honestly, most pain is something to worry about. It's obviously not a normal scratch and this happens often so it's best to go back and seek help to get rid of this pain.
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You recently answered my question about wha to do with my ex. And i was wondering about how long should i leave him alone. Because ive just endured about 3 months without him. What should happen for him during the no contact period? He hasnt even texted me first for three days now since i tried the nocontact pwriod. I was planning that in the end of this week that id ask him to go to christmas in the park with me and just be on good terms and then dissapear again after that. Is that such a good idea? (link)
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I think you're trying to make it like a game. Like talk to him, then stop, then talk again. I think it's going to do more harm to you. If you invite him to go to Christmas in the park with you then you're just going to keep falling back into the same pattern. You might even slip and tell him how you feel about him again.
I think just plain space between you guys is good for now. As of right now, he is dead set on not being with you.
You don't want to go chasing after a guy who doesn't want you. It makes you feel worthless and in his mind, you're not worth being with. It really sucks and if you keep trying to push him to get back together, it's just going to make you feel worse and make him want you less.
By asking him to go to Christmas in the park with you, he'll know you're still crazy about him. He is the one that has you wrapped around his finger. You don't want to be in that place, remember that.
So for now, don't contact him. Maybe in a month, text him and just talk normal. See how that goes then go from there.
And also don't forget when you do talk to him, don't go talking about the two of you.
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i am a 13 year old male and i want to become a christian i have been going to church and praying to god and i feel good after praying talking to him about my problems i have started reading the bible
what else can i do to get closer to god? (link)
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I'd suggest when reading the Bible, read a chapter like in Proverbs and write something you learned from it. It makes you feel closer and you still learn something.
Besides talking to him about your problems, just talk to him about life and everything you're grateful for. That doesn't just help you get closer to him, but also makes you realize all the small things you are grateful for.
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My ex boyfriend and I have broken up for 3 months so far. I am trying to get him back and lately ive been trying to be just casual with him but i always end up slipping and i start talking about why we should e together again. This topic always annoys him and our last argument he told me that he has many problems going on like family the worry of starting college next year and fake friends. He sai that im not helping becaus ei keep adding on to the shit he has to endure everyday by talking about our old relationship. So he followed up by saying that hes tired of everything and that he does not wan tro be in a relationship to make me happy and live with someone beside him that he has no feelings for. Its weird because two weeks ago when we saw each other he told me he still had feelings for me and then we proceeded doing intimate things together.he also told me that hes been teying to forget about us and move on but because i keep texting him to be casual it made it harder for him to move on. And so i have no idea what to do to pull hik back entirely. Ive heard methods like te no contact method. Then theres the "just be a frend" method that ive been failing at i guess. And i dnt know what to do please help because i really want him back. I guess it does sound selfish but i know somewhere in him he still has feelings for me. Weve been together for even more than a year already. He cant just leave that fast right? What should i do? So far ive turned off my imessage so i wont get any message from him although i doubt i would. (link)
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I think I just answered your question that you posted earlier.
Well I'll just repeat what I said. Pretty much, you can't make him want to be with you.
Me and my boyfriend were together for over 2 years. Believe me, they can leave that fast. Feelings change over time and the things he told me was that he has a lot going on with school and his feelings have changed and things like that.
I would try to talk to him all the time and even beg him to take me back. That just pushed him away even more. So don't keep doing that. Like you, I even became intimate with him, he did tell me he has feelings but he's just not sure anymore.
So I do believe he might have feelings for you still but you're handling it the wrong way. It's just making him want you less and less. If he did get back together with you out of pity for you, you both just won't be happy.
So my advice to you would be to just stop. It's not right for you to keep doing this to him even though it really hurts to not be with him. We've all been there but he's seriously just confused about what he wants. Let him figure things out. Take care of yourself right now. Do things to show him that you're worth it. Go out with your friends, take up a new hobby, just enjoy yourself. You shouldn't keep talking to him because you'll end up bringing up getting back together and you'll get in a fight so just give it time. If he wants you, he wants you. If he doesn't, he doesn't.
I also posted this on your question.
http://thebreakupblogger.tumblr.com/post/358605840/its-not-really-over-till-youve-dragged-both-you-and
It really helped me and made me feel better when I went through a break up. Reading other peoples stories really helped me.
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There's a boy in my class named Brian. He always sits with me and my friends and makes jokes and always makes me laugh. He always pokes and tickles me in the side a lot, pretends to take my stuff and just mess with me, and recently I've started to like him. I always can't wait to get to school to see him and talk to him. One day he was telling me how much he liked my best friend (she doesn't like him) (she doesn't sit with us) I felt crushed when he said that but didn't say anything. I also get mad with another "friend" making fun of me and saying if he did like me, he'd just want to sleep with me. I don't want to ask him out because I'm afraid that he'll hate me and not want to be around me anymore. How can I get him to like me? (Btw I'm almost 16) (link)
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Well you can't make anyone like you. It sucks, but it's the truth.
But lucky for you, it does sound like he is at least a little bit interested in you because most guys don't poke and tickle you if they weren't attracted to you.
So my suggestion is to be completely confident with yourself. Wear things you feel and look great in. If you wear make up, make it look natural and pretty. Just do things that make you feel good about yourself. Obviously, don't overdo either of these things. You don't want to look sleazy by wearing skimpy or too tight clothes or caking on make up.
Talk to him when you see him. Smile and say hi. Wear that confidence and he'll be even more attracted to you. Become closer to him as a friend and you can invite him out with a few of your other friends to go to see a movie or bowling or something. If he's into your best friend, then you might want to talk to her about it first and make sure she won't make him think he has a chance with her or something.
If you guys get along then, then you can decide what you want to do from there. If you want to tell him you like him, then do that. If you want to ask him to hang out with just the two of you, if he says yes, then he's definitely into you.
In the end, if he just doesn't like you, there's nothing you can really do about it but find someone else. If you're afraid he'll hate you then he doesn't sound like a very nice guy and I don't know why you'd want to be with him in the first place.
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So my ex boyfriend and i were together for over a year. We broke up for 3 months now and ive been trying to pull him back. Hes had major problems lately and i feel like because of how i keep like selfishly constantly askin him to get back with me that it gives him more stress. And due to that and our argument just not that angerily he told me he has no feelings for me anymore because hes so tired of all the problems in his life like fmaily problems and friends provlems.he told me tjat hes been trying to move on and forget about me but my constant texts make it harder for him. I was wonder if the no contact method would really work? Because i feel like if i dont contatc him he will forget me. Please give me advice on what i should do to get him back please. (link)
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You can't make anyone want to get back together with you if they don't want to.
Honestly, if I were you, I'd let him sort through his problems and stop pestering him about getting back together when he clearly does not want to get back together.
Maybe in the future when things are better for him, talk to him and start as friends and see how it goes from there.
You're being disrespectful to him by not listening to what he's telling you.
I know break ups are tough. When me and my boyfriend of two years broke up, I would do the same thing as you. I was so desperate to get back together with him so I do sympathize with you and I understand how crazy it can make you.
I read this blog on break ups when I was going through a hard time and she was ten times more crazy, she jumped over his fence and went to his door with a robe and lingerie on trying to get him back. It gave me a good laugh but it makes you feel like you're not alone. So here's the link to that just in case your interested in it.
http://thebreakupblogger.tumblr.com/post/358605840/its-not-really-over-till-youve-dragged-both-you-and
But seriously, just wait it out and don't keep bothering him about it. It'll just push him away even more.
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Does the no contact method really work for an ex boyfrien? (link)
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What do you mean? Do you mean to get him back or to get over him?
Well for either one, it really depends on the person.
If you meant if the no contact method helps in getting over him, then it really depends on you. Obviously if you keep talking to him and keep in contact with him, you won't get over him as fast as you would if you weren't talking to him. That's just common sense. Of course, you'd have to put in the rest of the effort of trying to move on by keeping yourself busy and meeting other people.
If you meant if the no contact method works to get him back, then that depends on the guy. If he's the type of guy who wants what he can't have, then it will work better with him. If he's not, then that's a 50/50 chance.
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okay i am a 13/f in middle okay. i went with this boy name j. okay during our relationship he seem like he was afarid to speak to me. so i broke up with him for another reason. now he speak to me like everyday now and be my friend.
I wonder why he would do that to me?
What does this mean?
please help.
~thanks (link)
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He was probably just shy when you guys were in a relationship. Since you guys aren't together anymore he doesn't feel that kind of pressure that he HAS to talk to you because you are his girlfriend.
That would be my best guess.
Plus boys your age are just weird and awkward when it comes to relationships and dating. It's a learning experience at your age.
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18/f
So I've been with a guy for two months now in a relationship.
He's really into me, and even talks of me being 'the one' and marriage etc.
However I recently went out clubbing and remembered how good the single life is. Not in a hoe type way-but how nice it is to be free and flirty.
I do love my boyfriend, but I just don't fancy him and (this sounds so harsh) I do think I could do better.
However I'm his first girlfriend and considering he thinks we'll be life partners, I don't want to hurt his feelings. He said he thought he'd be a loner all his life until he met me.
I used to think when I came to Uni that I wanted a relationship, now I'm in one all I want is to have a bit of freedom again. I mean heavens, somethings wrong here when I find 80% of the club guys hotter than my boyfriend.
How can I get out of this mess? And sorry this is so long! (link)
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Well you obviously shouldn't stay with him if you aren't happy in the relationship. He may be a great guy, treat you right, but maybe the chemistry just isn't there for you anymore.
Like Zane said, 2 months into the relationship is really early to start talking about marriage and such. I had a boyfriend who told me he loved me within 2 weeks of our relationship and that just freaked me out a bit.
So don't stay with him if you aren't happy. Don't stay with him just because you don't want to hurt his feelings. In the long run, you'll hurt him worse. If you leave now, he'll have a chance to move on sooner and find someone else who is better for him.
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Hi...* just a bit curious if this guy likes me....* today we were moving and °̩ had to ride with him and we were alone and he was talking dirty( witch °̩ love) stuff like toutching м̣̣y♐ boobs and getting me undressed...* he also told me some personal stuff to...* he told me he would't flirt but. °̩ think he did.... Help? What should °̩ do? (link)
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He just wants to have sex with you. He's a horny boy pretty much. It doesn't mean he has feelings for you. It just means he's attracted to your body and wants to talk dirty with you.
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Last night, my mother went to bed early and it was just me and my stepdad in the kitchen. As I was preparing myself to take my medication, he came up, pulled my shirt up and started rubbing my stomach while I had my back turned. Should I be nervous? What does it mean? (link)
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I can't say it's inappropriate since touching someones stomach isn't an inappropriate place to touch someone but if he's making you uncomfortable just tell him. If he does it again, tell your mom and ask her to tell him to stop touching you because it makes you uncomfortable even if he means it sincerely and not creepy.
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there is this tutor I work with in the tutoring lab in college. She's great and a wonderful person to be around with. She is about 28 and I am 22 and she is engaged, My class ended a few months ago but I saw her around campus when I was going to meet up with a friend recently and chatted with her
now I find myself going out of my way to that location just so I can hopefully see her and talk to her again. Last week I went and sat there for about half an hour (I had nothing else to do though so I wasn't skipping anything) I just get this extremely good feeling when talking to her or seeing her. Is this creepy?
someone responded this
"You better watch what you're doing or you could end up on the wrong side of her boyfriend and that could result in you with a sore face.
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But this makes no sense, if her boyfriend came after me and attacked me for no reason that would be assault and I can probably press charges
I recently ran into this girl again. She was in the math lab, I went in and started chatting to her and she seemed happy to see me and happy to chat. I get this extremely good feeling whenever I see her or talk to her. I can't explain it
(link)
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I doubt he'd come after you for sitting around waiting for his fiance just to talk to her. But yeah, if he did it would be assault but if she said anything about you stalking her or something, then you could be in trouble too.
Anyways, if you keep doing this, it is kind of creepy. It's understandable that you really like her but technically what you are doing is wrong. You're not sitting there waiting for her just to talk to her because you like her as a friend. You're going there because you like her, but she's engaged to be married to someone else. So it is wrong.
You're pretty much just setting yourself up for heartbreak and I would stop if I were you.
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Sooo, I just started dating this guy about a week ago. He's really nice and whatnot. But, my previous, and also first boyfriend, would get really mad at me whenever I didn't kiss him. It was my first kiss, but I don't like telling people that because it sucked (he's also my second boyfriend after my previous one). I hated it. I'm scared to kiss him. I told him why and he kind of backed off which made me feel better. I want to kiss him. I just freak out about it. He tells me I need to boost my confidence but I don't know what else to do. I know I'll have to do it someday. I'm even nervous about it just typing this! I've asked friends and everything, but they're no help. Someone with experience or something help me! :( (link)
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It's totally normal to feel nervous about kissing. You need to move at your own pace. When I had my first kiss, it was about a month or two into the relationship. He didn't pressure me at all. You need to feel completely comfortable or else you just won't enjoy it. If he pushes you about it or you kiss before you're ready, you just won't enjoy it. Kissing is natural and it happens when the time is right.
So, him telling you that you need a confidence boost isn't going to help. If he brings it up again then just explain that you're not ready and you don't want to feel pressured into it. You care about him but you just want to wait until the time is right. If he cares about you, he won't bring it up and he'll wait until you are ready.
But besides that, you don't need to stress out about it. Kissing is supposed to be fun and no one is ever going to be perfect in the beginning. My first kiss was just a peck and you don't need to be making out for your first kiss. When you're comfortable around him, it'll come naturally.
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Im 16 and he's 17. We been together for 10months. We fight so much and im not sure how to stop it. The littlest things cause it. He's cheated on me about 4 months ago so I have a big trust concern so I wanna look at his phone and I want him to make sure every girl he talks to knows he has a gf but he doesn't like that. We fight about me going on his instagram page, asking to see his phone, mentioning if the person hes texting knows he has a gf or not, even if he hugs another girl I get so pissed. I feel like now everybody is a threat. I don't know how to get over it and stop... (link)
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You can't be in a relationship with someone you can't trust.
It's understandable that you have these problems because of him cheating on you, but if you forgave him and took him back, then that's what you did and you can't really do anything but trust him again. If you couldn't trust him and believe him, why did you stay with him after he cheated?
If you want this relationship to work, you need to work on this with him and with yourself.
Sit him down and have a talk with him. No fighting, not arguing, no pointing fingers at each other.
I do think that girls he's talking to should know he has a girlfriend. The reason why is so that they know not to step over any boundaries and he should be ok with that. If not, then he's not proud to have you as a girlfriend and you shouldn't be with him anyways.
As for asking to see him phone, hugging other girls, this is your problem and you need to work on that yourself. If you don't, then the relationship just isn't going to work and you guys won't be happy.
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First of all, thanks for taking the time to read through this. I'll just get straight to the point. I'm a 24 (almost 25) year-old guy, and I have a roommate who's 19. We met at work, and are great friends. When I met his family, I felt a pretty strong emotional pull towards his sister. After a while, I realized I was pretty strongly attracted to her, and so far it seems like the feeling is mutual, though I've not actually asked her about it yet.
Without going through too much backstory, I found out during that time of growing attraction that she's actually sixteen, rather than the 17, close to 18 that I thought. Now, I'm really wanting to do the right thing here, not to mention without landing myself in jail, but my problem is that I've always fallen hard and fast when it comes to matters of the heart, and I'm in a bit of a pickle... I've talked to my roommate, and he's alright with the idea, but I really need some advice as to how to approach this. My gut says to tell her, and stay friends for the next year and a half, but I could really use your advice on this. Also there's the little question of talking to her mom about it...
P.S. In case it's relevant, I live in Arizona. (link)
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I'm with the other two on this one.
I'm not saying your feelings aren't real or anything like that. It's just, this can get you into a lot of trouble. Even if her whole family loves you and is ok with you dating her, if anyone else finds out, they can report you and you can end up in prison. It doesn't even matter if her parents are ok with you guys together.
The others already mentioned the laws of crossing over the border and all that as well. The law is very strict and won't bend for your situation.
I'm sure she's a mature 16 year old but you're about 8 years older than her.
Even if the law wasn't involved, you both are in different places in your life. She's still a teenager in high school. You both will want different things and have different needs in the relationship.
So, don't bring it up with her. Just stay friends with her and nothing more. If the attraction is still there by the time she is 18, then go for it and see where it goes. If you decide to pursue this now, it can end up a mess.
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how will i stop missing someone who is always in my mind? (link)
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Well you didn't give much detail but the best thing to do is distract yourself. They'll come in your mind every once in awhile but if you keep yourself busy, it won't happen as often.
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