about

My name is Teza.. short for Tereza. I was born in Croatia and I speak more than one language. I'm 22 years old & I completed 2 college degrees in 3 years. My a bachelors is in Business Administration concentration in Human Resources and my Masters degree is also in HR.



I started this advice column about 9years ago and I was so young but it was something that I always loved to do. I am trying to get back to answering questions, at least a few per day. With that said, if you have questions about school, friends, make up, etc., feel free to ask.





Much love, Teza

advice

My boyfriend wants me to kiss him before he kisses me. At least I think so. It seems like it because after we go somewhere together...for example we went to the movies. When I got home i was talking to one of his friends online and he said hows come you didnt kiss him? And I think he should kiss me first!!! What should I do??

Well it doesnt really matter on who kisses who first. Its just a kiss. Guys are expected to make the first move but at this point he wants you to do it. I think that you should defenetly make the first move and kiss him. If you dont wanna french kiss just give him a nice kiss on the cheek when you see him. He would appreciate it and he just might end up kissing you. You both have to get comftrable with each other. =] x0

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is it possibl for a person to not like someon anymore, but not be over him (if that makes sense!). because that's what i think is happening 2 me. i liked this guy A LOT for A LONG TIME, but the thing is that he was a jerk about it (i'd tell the details for u 2 understand it better, but it would be soooo long...) . anyway, i don't think i like him any more (no more butterflies in my stomach, no more going out of my way just to see him go to his next class, no more of his name on my notebook, etc.) . but the thing is that EVERYONE knew about it (even my english teacher!) and whenever i get into a convo w/ anyone, they always bring him up, and i can't 4get about him...that is, nobody will LET me. i still think about him occasionally, but not in the same way, so i don't think i like him. but i still think about him, and i haven't 4gotten the feelings i had 4 him. is it possible that i don't like him, but can't quite get over him? or do u think that i still like him? whatver it is, how do i 4get about him? i rate 5's 4 ne1 who helps!

I defenetly understand what you mean. Its totally possible to feel that way. You dont like him but you care for him in a friendship kind of way and thats fine. Its acually better l0l. If he was a jerk then Im glad that you are over him. Im sure you can do way better. x0 ` __

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Have you noticed if a girl has sex they are called a slut and when a guy has sex they get more popular. I dont understand it please someone explain it to me or give your opinion on it!!
i rate high!

I noticed that too and I think its bull sh*t!! Its so immature and who ever says that stuff is totally messed up! The guys get popular because their buddies think its "cool" but to the girls its not. I mean a lot more guys wanna have sex then girls so when a girl has sex they think its slutty. Personally I dont think thats a slut. A slut is someone who sleeps around with a whole bunch of guys. People who say that have no life and they obviosly dont know what they are talking about!! Thats just my opinion! x0 ` __

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yesterday was the talent show at our school, and me, and my xbestfriend were both in it, but not together. she went before me, and i was right after her. when i got up on stage i saw her hug the boy i like. i almost choked on a high note. he's not my boyfriend but im still REALLY jealous and REALLY worried he's gonna start liking her. is this normal and what should i do?

Jelousy is totally normal. Its kinda a way of telling that you really like someone and that you care for them. I think that you shoudnt really worry about him liking her and talk to the guy a lot more so he starts liking you. If I sound mean sorry but you cant control how he feels. It might hurt you to see him with someone else but he can hug whoever he wants. To feel jelous is totally normal but hang out with him a lot and you would feel better! x0 ` __

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What do you do for clammy hands?

Wash your hands really good and then put good lotion on them. x0 ` __

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I feel like the worst person in the world. On March 17 me and my boyfriend of 3 years got into a huuuge fight because he cheated on me. Our relationship was sooo good and we always got told that we were the role model for couples, well anyways..we got into a huge fight and we said things that we didnt mean and I told him that I wish he wasnt in my life and he would just die because I hated him so much, those were my exact words. Later that night at 11:26 I got a phone call from his sister (we were really close, she was like a little sister to me) she was crying really hard and she told me that she had found him in his room laying on the floor, dead. I didnt even know what to do with myself. He had taken a gun to his head. She read me a note that he left and it said "I'm so sorry, I love you so much" thats all it said, and he had the date that we started going out until forever carved into his arm. That night when my parents found out they tried to comfort me and all that but I just didnt want to be around anyone. I went to my room and I cut myself so bad and my mom walked in and stopped me and just held me and I cried for hours, with my wrists bleeding, and I fell asleep crying in my moms arms. I'm getting help now. I went to his funeral and it was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my life, I fell to the floor when I went up to his casket at the wake and his mom had to pick me up and just hold me while we cried. I go to his house all the time and talk to his family and just tell them how sorry I am and we talk about all of our memories. I havent slept since the night it happened, and I havent been to school, the doctors say I probably wont go to school for about another month, I might be homeschooled. I can't even look at myself anymore. I can't beleive those hateful words were the last words I ever got to tell the love of my life. I'm sorry it is really long but does anyone have any advice on how to help me get through this?

Omg! I`m so sorry that it happend! Dont blame your self for his death. It was his choice. Sometimes when you are in fights you say things you dont mean and now you know not to do that again because it can really hurt that person. Its not your fault. You both were very angry with each other. I cant blame you at all. You will see him again one day and cutting yourself isnt the answer. You might think that it will make you feel better but it doesnt. It makes you feel worse. He will always be in your heart and always with you no matter what. It wont be the same as having him there but hes always with you. You will always remeber him and he will always remember you. You will get through this and everyone is here for you. Again Im sorry! x0 ` __

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well i decided to have a sleep-over but i dont know what i should do or what movies i sohlud rent.. pleez help me out here. if u say truth or dare please give examples.

There is a lot of things you can do! Sleep over's are so much fun l0l because you and your friends can have a good time and be crazy l0l! For the movies I would rent a couple of scary movies and then a funny movie after. I wouldnt watch movies for too long tho. Truth or dare would be fun but it all depends on how far you wanna go with it l0l. Some other people told you a lot of examples so I dont think theres a need to say more l0l. When I had a sleep over thing for my birthday we did a lot of things. For one, you and your friends can do a lil make over thing. Do each others hair and makeup. Take a lot of pictures listen to music stuff like that. Im sure it will be fun !! Have a good time! x0 ` __

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Last night I tried to kill yself by ODing on sleeping pills. It didnt work though obviously. All that I remember is my dad bringing me into bed and my body started spazing out. I woke up this morning feeling really sick. And really upset because it didnt work.And the sad thing is htough.. If it had... I'm sure that my dad wouldnt have noticed and my mother wouldnt have noticed becaused she was on drugs and passed out. I just dont know what to do with my self. I need some advice. I also feel embarassed.. because after I tok the pills (they were sleeping pills) I wasnt in the right state of mind.. and one of my teachers IMed me when I was online and we had a conversation about stuff becasue I asked them if they ever knew a friend that tried to commit suicide... I mean come on now! wouldnt that just blow your mind? ugh. I dont know what to do. Someone please help me. I'll rate...If thats what it takes to get a decent answer

Commiting suicide isnt the right way to die. You should never try to do that again. You are going through some stages of depression. I've been through it and a lot of people have also. There is many things that you can do instea of trying to kill your self. Wouldnt you want your life to be better and get some help? Teenage years are the toughest and everyone is always stressed out. Find some one to talk to. Your friends and family are always there for you even though at times it may not seem like it but they love you and they dont want anything to happen to you. Talk to a trustful friend or go to a counslor. There are many ways you can get help but killing your self is surely not the right answer!! God didn want you to die and no one else does. There is many people that care about you even tho you may not think so. If you need anything else or to talk just leave it in my inbox or IM me because I know exacly what you are gowing through. x0 ` __

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Well, I was best friends with this girl (lets call her A), and then me and A started hanging out less and now we don't hang out at all anymore. She even has another best friend now. How do I get her back to being my best friend? I rate high!

Start talking to her more. You shouldnt of stoped being friends with her. But just try to be like you guys used to be. Im sure she would want to talk to you again and maybe you guys wont be best friends again but it might take time. x0 ` __

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okay, me and my bf are going to end up having sex sooner or later. i'm afraid of getting pregnant though. i wouldn't go through with it unless he's wearing a condom, but is there another way i can prevent pregnancy? and i dont think birth control is such a good idea because my mom will get maddd! 14/female

thank you ahead of time

Well I think that you might be too young but its up to you. If you are comftrable and ready for it then go ahead. I think if you took birth control pills and if he wore a condom would prevent you from getting pregnat. x0 ` __

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hey. okay i have some stretch marks on my boobs, and im very slef concious about them. none of m friends have them. my boobs arent even that big either! why did i get them, and what can i do to get them go away? i'm afraid to do anything sexual witha guy because im embarresed. i cant wear low shirts because of it. what can i do to maek this go away?

Thats totally normal. They will go away. Its just that your boobs are growing faster then some other peoples. You can buy coca butter at stores and it will help them go away. x0 ` __

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Well, my boyfriend has been away on spring break for the past week and a half and I miss him a lot. He told me to call him during the day, and nights to talk to him.(As I usually do) So, I tried calling the first night and his phone was off, the second night it was still off. Well, last night I finally got to talk to him on AIM, and he said he missed me & missed talking with me. I really miss him, too. And it made me real happy that he said that. Anyway, does anyone know anything I could say to him to make him feel like I really missed him? Because I dunno, he's always first to say those types of things, and I don't want him to feel like I don't like him. Thaaanks.

Ariel

Aw I`m sure he knows that you love him and miss him. Next time you call leave him a message and just say I miss you so much and I cant wait til you come back! x0 ` __

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i have these jeans that i want to put rinestones on. what kind of glue should i use???

Use fabric glue but if not then just use an iron. It also works and its not as messy. x0 ` __

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Okay my friends b-day is coming up and i want to give her a mix CD well I duno how to get the music. I know how to make the cd and everything. but is there any sites where i can get the music to put on the site?? thanks so much i rate high

I know a couple.

www.limewire.com

www.winMX.com

www.kazaa.com

www.ares.com

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Me and my boyfriend have been going out almost a month. During that time I have became really good friends with 2 of his best friends and I'm starting to like them. I liked the one before I started going out with my current boyfriend though. What should I do?

Dont break up with your boyfriend. Take the time to think about all of this. Your boyfriend loves you and you dont want to loose him and I`m sure you love him too. Dont hang out with his 2 best friends as much until you figure everything out. You have stronger feelings for your boyfriend I bet. But do what ever you want. If you dont like your boyfriend break up with him and maybe go out with his friend even tho its kind of rude. x0 ` __

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Hi, I'm going to a carnival dance and I'm not sure on what to wear. The weather is in the high forties to low fifties, but the place of the dance is EXTREMELY HOT.

Is this a good outfit:

White tank, black miniskirt, and pink tweed heels

OR .. ANY SUGGESTIONS? AND HAIR SUGGESTIONS? I'll rate high for appropriate answers.

Yes, I think what you choose is cute!! Maybe the white tank you could change it to a different color like pink or something. If not then add some accesories like a pink purse or braclet. What ever you want. For your hair you could scrunch it. You could also curl it all of put it half way up. If you dont want to curl it then just straighten it. It will be cute! x0 ` __

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one group of my friends drink a lot and i dont really care that much about it. im not against it or anything. my only concern is that i know sometime i will be involved in a situation where i will be asked if i want a drink... the thing is, i have never drank before, i don't want to say no, but i don't want to get the reputation that i always do that stuff. whats your advice?

oooOOhhH PeeER PreSSuuure... lol

If you dont want to drink with them then thats fine just say no and get a soda or something. If they are peer pressuring you into doing it just tell them to back off. Drinking isnt soo soo bad but if you want you could take a little bit. You wont have a bad reputation of drinking and doing it all the time trust me. Only your friends will know. Do what you think is smart and whats best for you. x0 ` __

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15/F

While growing up I never had the "two parent home" that most have and I am fine with that. My mother has been great, The only problem was the show of love always bothered me. IE: kissing, hugging, holding hands. I never felt comfortable around that stuff because I never saw it and I didn't know how to act when someone did. Its not that I didn't get effection or anything but I didn't see kissing or love toward another man with my mom so when others did it I thought it was wrong. (just my young childish logic) Fast forward to now, I'm 15 and i guess I have a BF. Well, he likes me. We've kissed/madeout and held hands. We have a date saturday and I'm acually not that nervous for the most part. Its just that I don't know how to tell him my feelings, He said "I love you", I said "I love you" but that just doesn't seem to cut if for me. I don't want to seem clingy and I really don't feel comfortable saying i love you since everyone in my family is seriously screwed with love. I like Ryan and I don't want to get hurt by him or hurt him. (I'm afraid I might make a rash decision and dump him)
So exactly how do I get myself to calm down and just enjoy the fact that he likes me?

Hmm.. I`ll try to help here but I`m not sure if I know how. Everyone in your family loves you. All of your friends love you. Now you just have to accept the fact that this guy really does like you for who you are and dont worry about it. He wants to be there for you. I think that you should let him know how you feel so he doesnt try to take things too fast. He will defenetly understand how you feel and what you are going through. x0 ` __

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hey, ok, well my room always seems to get EXTREMELY messy. i straigten it up, but then it just gets dirty right away. there's always clothes on the floor, desk cluttered, dishes everywhere, the works. so, this is a pretty general quesiton, so anything constructive i will rate 5's! so, plz give me some tips on how you keep your room decent!

I had the same problem. Get a basket or something for your clothes and put them in there. When ever its a lil dirty just clean it up so it doesnt get really dirty later on. Get a box or a cup or something for your pens and pencils. If you eat in your room get a lil trash can and just throw it in there instead of leaving it out everywhere. x0 ` __

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i like a guy who is a year older than me. He's amazingly cute and a lot of girls like him. at the beginning of this year we saw each other at these student forum meetings at school and he always came and sat by me and talked and smiled-i could tell he liked me so at the homecoming dance i asked him to dance and it was great- at school we usually just say hi and smile in a flirtacious way during passing periods-but lately we don't say anything and i don't think he likes me anymore-how do i get his attention and get him to like me again?

Start talking to him again! Be yourself. When you see him say hi and always keep in touch. Once you guys start talking again invite him to the movies or to go somewhere with you. He liked you once and I`m sure he will still like you. x0 ` __

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