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Afraid of Love
15/F
While growing up I never had the "two parent home" that most have and I am fine with that. My mother has been great, The only problem was the show of love always bothered me. IE: kissing, hugging, holding hands. I never felt comfortable around that stuff because I never saw it and I didn't know how to act when someone did. Its not that I didn't get effection or anything but I didn't see kissing or love toward another man with my mom so when others did it I thought it was wrong. (just my young childish logic) Fast forward to now, I'm 15 and i guess I have a BF. Well, he likes me. We've kissed/madeout and held hands. We have a date saturday and I'm acually not that nervous for the most part. Its just that I don't know how to tell him my feelings, He said "I love you", I said "I love you" but that just doesn't seem to cut if for me. I don't want to seem clingy and I really don't feel comfortable saying i love you since everyone in my family is seriously screwed with love. I like Ryan and I don't want to get hurt by him or hurt him. (I'm afraid I might make a rash decision and dump him)
So exactly how do I get myself to calm down and just enjoy the fact that he likes me?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You just enjoy the time you spend together.
Will either of you get hurt later? Probably,it happens to everyone.Don't let the future worry you today.Some people are all touchy feely and some are not.It doesn't mean they aren't capable of it whith someone they love.You may not have reached the true love stage yet.That's okay, it isn't always there at the beginning.So enjoy what you have now and it will happen or it won't with this guy.If for some reason it doesn't, it will one day with someone else.
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Hey, I'm 15 too, and my parents divorced when I was about one. I know what you mean about showing love being somewhat bothersome. To me, it was only when my mom had a boyfriend or something that it bothered me. Ok, to the question. At 15 years old, I can't really say that I have ever been in love. I have had some crushes, but that's about it. I'm not saying that you don't love Ryan, but with something like "LOVE", you have to go slow and just enjoy each other. Try not to put too much pressure on the relationship, because that may wind up destroying it altogether. When you are with him, try not to stress the love thing too much. The best thing to do right now is to just have fun and enjoy the fact that you have someone whom you like and who likes you back. These are supposed to be the best times of our lives; try to make the best of it. Friendly advice from Caleb.
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Hmm.. I`ll try to help here but I`m not sure if I know how. Everyone in your family loves you. All of your friends love you. Now you just have to accept the fact that this guy really does like you for who you are and dont worry about it. He wants to be there for you. I think that you should let him know how you feel so he doesnt try to take things too fast. He will defenetly understand how you feel and what you are going through. x0 ` __
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Hi Sweetie,
You don't Time does. ...The more of it that goes by you start realizing... maybe not everything has to be difficult or end up in someone's pain or unhapiness. ...Maybe you like him and he likes you and that is just great. Everything you can ask for right now. ...I can somewhat relate. ...But it's worst for me. ...I don't hold my boyfriend's hand... we hardly ever kiss... hell hugging him is awkward. I love him and I've said it. ...He has said it mosre than once... me just once. ...Being affectionate is a new concept, especially with guys. ...And it makes it weirder knowing that... he does like me... I don't know but giving affection can be weird, but I find it weirder knowing you are getting it back.
...It does get eassier. ...With the passing of time you it becomes less of a new oncept and more of... an expression of affection. I've experienmce it quite ome times now. ...I'm sorry I cannot say much that is helpful to our problem, but that is because in my experience it is not words that helps this particular problem. It's time. ...You'll see how things will start chaning on how you feel and how you express your feelings. ...Then you won't worry. You'll think to yourself "worrying??? Hell with it. There's nothing to worry about. We like eachother and we know that and... we make eachother happy. Period."
Have a goodnight! ~Blessed Be...
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If he likes you, thats great! You should figure out if you like him too. People rush into saying "I love you" nowadays. My thing is...if you don't mean it or don't think you mean it, you probably shouldn't even say it to begin with. Don't dump him just yet, just get to know him. This is a great opportunity for you to become more comfortable around affection. You should be REAL and TRUE to him..tell him what you've told me! This way, you won't come off as clingy and he might just even UNDERSTAND you better! It seems that you are uncomfortable around him since you are unable to get your feelings out to him, but really, all it takes is a little communication. Just start talking and it'll all come out and he'll understand how you feel. If he loves you like he says he does, trust me, he WILL understand. =)
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Just sit for a minute and think about why you love him. Is it his eyes? His hair? The way he talks to you? Just him being him all around? Think about it. Try and match it up. If "I love you" doesn't cut it for you, make sure you say his name. And also if he tells you first, make sure to say 'too' at then end ;3 You won't hurt him by just saying that, maybe just kind of stroke his arm or something to show that you /are/ affectionately attracted to him... and he won't hurt you if he's the right man... To calm yourself if that doesn't help, think of something irresistably cute (like dolphins or kittens o.O ) or repeat one soothing word over and over to yourself, imagining it in your head.... Hope I helped somehow. <3 EJ
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