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If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.[9/2/08] [5/7/08] [16/7/08] [23/9/09] [28/5/10] [29/5/10] [3/6/10]
Laura/22/England
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advice
do guys think about other girls sexually even though there in love?
Depends on the guy.
thank you for answering my other question, but i have a little more info on the trusting my mom issue. see latly iv been thinking about sex. I know im not ready yet, but i also know that the whole 'sex' decision is not too far off. when i was younger, my mom would tell me that when sex became something to me, that she would be supportive, that she would get me birth control and that i could always talk to her. well now i dont think i can trust her with it when i am ready. it scares me a bit.
Hey hun.
To be totally honest, I'm not surprised it scares you a bit. Your mum doesn't really like your boyfriend already and I'm guessing bringing sex into it isn't going to go down too well.
BUT, she is your mum and the nicest thing to do would be to try and let her know.
Tell her what you told me - You aren't ready just yet but for when the time comes, you want to know if she will still help you with birth control etc.
If she kicks off, don't make a big deal about it. Just calmly tell her it's okay, because at the end of the day, you can get birth control on your own. Buy your own condoms, see a doc if you want the pill etc.. and you can let her know this. The fact if she doesn't help you doesn't mean you're not going to do it.
If she doesn't come around by the time you start having sex and she's still being stubborn about your boyfriend, there will always be people to talk to (not including your mum) so don't ever think you'll be on your own if a problem should arise.
15f boyfriend is 16 and we have not had sex, just kissed. Lately I have been having this sudden urge to give him a handjob, sounds weird because im not the one being pleased. He hasnt asked for one or even mentioned it, but i have been thinking about it a lot and i dont know why.
It's just a mixture of hormones and wanting to please your boyfriend. It's natural and normal.
16/F I have a boyfriend (17/m), and he is wonderful. he is sweet, kind, fun, compgassionate, and everything i thought i would never find. Yes i know im young, there for i cant possiably be in love, right. Sorry thats bull. I cant really explain it, i just know you know? I love him. thats not the problem tho. we got in a little trouble together a while back. nothing illeagle or life threatening tho. The first time, i let him in the house when he wasn't supposed to be. Long story but he was covered in scraches and mud, i had to let him use the bathroom to get cleaned up. Poor guy, wouldn't you have helped him? the second time, i skiped a day of school. ya bad i know, but it was during finals, but i had already finished the finals for those classes, and it was a PARTY day. Beasides i DID plan to go back for rehearsal. so anyway, now my mom is soo hateful toward my boyfriend, she keeps telling me how she dosn't trust us, but mostly him, how he is SUCH a bad, stupid guy and she is always dogging him. you have no idea how hurtful it is to have your mom being so hateful toward the man i love. plus there are things i need her support on, things im supposed to be able to trust her on, and i cant. i cant trust or talk to my own mother. i dont know what to do.
She is just being a mother. From her point of view, skipping school for him (even if you did finish those classes) isn't exactly going to get him in her good books.
I'm sure if your boyfriend needed help and cleaning up and you ASKED your mother instead of sneaking him in, maybe she would have changed her mind..?
Either way, you may have done a few things wrong in the past, but your mother shouldn't judge him how she is. She sounds a little over protective and just wants the best for her daughter. She may not see the "sweet, fun, compassionate" side just yet, but if you stick together with your boyfriend (and don't do anything else to make your mother dislike him), she may realize that maybe you two ARE good together and she was just being hasty.
You two need to prove yourself to her. Don't moan to her and constantly get on her case as to why she doesn't like him - she obviously doesn't know him well enough..
Is it possible to bring him round for dinner or something? Or any other way so they can communicate a little?
Like I said above, after a bit of time, she will probably get used to the fact that you two are sticking together. and once she sees you are maturing adults who are a good couple, she will change her mind about him.
I know you said you can't really talk to your mother, but if you can find it within yourself, sit her down and have a good chat to clear some things up. Or if you can't, write how you feel in a letter and give it to her.
She just seems a little clueless and doesn't want you to get hurt.
So my head has been really itchy the past month or so. And its just the back part of my head.
My hair is starting to fall out, like crazy.
Do you think its head lice? Or what?
I've checked the sides of my head, and there doesn't seem to be anything there. How do I check properly? Should I go to the doctor? Or what?
Hellppppp.
There are lots of causes for what you have described.
"Itchy scalp can be from hair regrowth or from other factors, such as nervous disorders and stress which causes hair loss. Other causes for your hair loss and itching include imflammatory disease, psoriasis, alopecia areata, etc"
I'd also like to point out that headlice don't make your hair fall out and if you can't see any when you check .. then you should rule that out.
Go to a doctor so they can pinpoint exactly what's causing your itchy scalp and hair loss and to get the treatment you need.
My boyfriend and I have been together for a while. I just recently started giving him handjobs and he's been fingering me. The only problem is, he's never fingered a girl before, and it shows. He always seems so confused he doesn't penetrate at all and I don't know how to tell him how to do it right. Any ideas?
If you're doing that stuff together, you should be able to talk to him about it. Maybe tell him as he's doing it, or just guide his hand..
He's just a little uneducated, which is totally normal because everyone has to start somewhere, so give him those hints.
If you don't tell him, he will just assume he's doing a great job, when in actual fact, you don't really like it too much.
It's not embarrassing to tell him how you want it. Every girl is different and likes being pleasured in different ways. So let him know. He will pleased you told him.
Hi TheLaura,
Okay, I have this problem...Sometimes after I eat or a few hours later I like to force up my food by burping. I will get a mouth full of food sometimes I will swallow it and sometimes I will spit it out. When I do it, I feel ..good but gross at the same time. I never really thought about whether I had a real problem or not until I gave it some thought. I wouldn't call myself bulimic?...Well..I mean I am not skinny but I'm not obese either. Wouldn't you have to be skinny or do something like that on a regular basis to be classified that anyway? Well, I don't know if I should go to the doctors or not. I do this as little as maybe once a month and it's usually only a mouthful. Do you think I have a serious problem? Have you ever heard of people doing this? Do you think I should see a doctor?
Any help is apprechiated
Thank you
-BahaiMa22
Hey BahaiMa, thanks for your question.
People seem to think you need to be skinny to have an eating disorder - fact is, anyone can be a victim of one and it doesn't matter how big you are.
Seeing as it's not very frequent, it wouldn't be classed as a serious, however, it is still a problem and not a normal or healthy thing to do.
How long have you been doing it? Do you have a particular reason for doing it? Is it because you aren't happy with your weight or you like the feeling of doing it etc? Either way, you should eliminate it altogether so you aren't giving it a chance of getting any worse and turning into something which can really put yourself at risk. Have you even tried to stop? I suggest going cold turkey, because it's not very frequent and should be easier to stop this way. If you find yourself not being able to stop or it's becoming a more frequent thing to do, by all means, chat to someone about it.
I broke with my bf of 4 months because his best(who likes me) said he didn't care. A week later I found out he did care and was upset that i dumped him. I told him i still love and want to be with him but he doesn't wanna be with me. I don't know how to get over him.
I'm not quite understanding this fully. You dumped your boyfriend because his mate didn't care? Since when was his friend part of YOUR relationship?
You really did mess up here and it's not surprising he doesn't want to take you back.
My advice would be to give him a bit of time to cool off. Who knows - he might actually miss you.
Once you've give him a bit of time (and yourself) you can begin to explain yourself fully and let him know it was a huge mistake. I'm sure you've already tried to reason with him, which might make it different this time round if you give him some space first.
At the end of the day, it's his decision whether you two can put things past you and try again. but if he doesn't want to, simply let it be a lesson learnt to you - never let other people interfere with your relationship.
It's gonna suck at first but a true way to get over someone is by giving it time and to do things to take your mind off it. Someone else will come along eventually.
i don't know what the quote ;
" inhale love exhale hate "
means can anyone help me please ?!
hahah kthanksbyee - toriibabeyyx0
Breathe in love, breathe out hate.
(Let the love into your life and let the hate out)
It's simple but effective. :)
What's a good way to get ride of them?
I always answer these questions with the same answer: Bio Oil.
It's specifically designed to combat stretch marks, scars, uneven skin tones etc and I've tried it out myself with scars. I was quite surprised that after using it for a while, I could see a change.
I'm not gonna lie, it won't work over night. and you have to stick to it and properly massage it deep into your skin (don't just slap it on). Give it a month or 2 for it to take effect.
I highly advise you to try it. It may well work for you.
You can get it at chemists and stores. but if you can't find it, you can also buy it online.
I'm sure there are other products similar to Bio Oil (I'm not sure on the names), so if Bio Oil is a little pricey for you, give the others a try. Or even Cocoa butter.
Where are your stretch marks? Make up does wonders for a quick fix.
me and my bf have been togethr for almost 2 months. and i liked him so much like a month or two before we got together. well we both told eachother we fell for eachother. and were in love. and i feel like im hella sprung. every song on the radio reminds me of him. i cant go a second without thinking bout him. i get butterflies. i think im seriously sprung. but is that a bad thing? i just dont want to get hurt. cuz my friend is the same with her bf and she got hella hurt recently but there beter now. but my question is how can i not be so sprung? and not be so much in love. i dont want to put all of myself into a guy and something does happen (which i dont think will happen) but still. i dont want to get hurt. well thanks so much in advance!
I'm sure we've all been there at some point.
You're in love - that's definitely not a bad thing. and at this stage, you should be focusing more on the present and enjoying the aspects of it, instead of worrying about getting hurt.
If you two love each other and any problems should arise, you will work through them - that's what love is all about - Sticking together through thick and thin.
It might not be easy, but if you're meant to be, things will work out.
and always remember, it's better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.
14/f
Is it normal for 12-14 year old boys to smell kind of.. weird? When they're not wearing cologne? Like not really bad or anything, just kind of... I don't know, weird! I've been noticing lately that more than half of the boys I sit next to kind of smell the same... lol! I know it's a weird question, but I'm just curious?! Thanks!!
Apparently, when you start hitting your teen years, you start to sweat in a different way, so it could be that.. unless they just have poor hygiene!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/science/humanbody/body/articles/lifecycle/teenagers/hair_and_sweat.shtml
I was stupid and I went and bought like a box of degree deodorant. It was a silly mistake and now i have 4 deodorants that leave white stuff behind. When i say white stuff, not only the marks but also pieces of the deodorant.
Should i just throw them out or is there a way to use it without getting this white stuff all over me and my clothes?
Shake them well before use and don't spray so close to your skin. Don't get dressed 'til it's fully dry.
If they're still crappy, bin 'em.
can i practice putting tampons in when i dont have my period?
If you use lubrication, it won't hurt putting it in and removing.
Just remember to take it out straight after, since using tampons when you aren't bleeding isn't exactly good for your body.
I saw HIM last night. I guess things went well? I really like him, and would love to be more than friends. But I don't know what HE WANTS. It is so hard to tell. I want to hang out with him again sometime soon. What should I text him?
I don't want to sound desperate and I want to sound really "casual and cool"
WHAT DO I SAY in a text??
"How did you find last night?"
It's a laid back question and doesn't scream "I WANT TO GO OUT WITH YOU!"
If he txts back and doesn't ask you already, hint you guys should do it again and ask him when.
so i had sex last night and we only realised this morning that one of the condoms we used had broken at the end.. So we decided to get the morning after pill.. I'm just really worried! This has never happened to me and so i'm totally lost! What do i do? And like what are the side effects of this pill? If any.. Will it affect my body physically, like i'd get wider hips and look a little fatter? Please help me asap. I'm freaking out!! :(
You should have been told about side effects by who gave you the pill, or at least be given an instruction booklet.
There can be side effects, but they certainly don't include you becoming any fatter. They include sickness (if you are sick within 3 hours after taking the pill, you may need another, so discuss this with your doc if it happens) feeling dizzy, headaches, stomach pains, spotting, your next period being out of time (early or late)
It's no reason to worry and if you do happen to be unlucky enough to suffer from some side effects, they will pass within a few days.
There's no need to worry. Just relax. The fact you took it the morning after is good in itself, because it's most effective.
Okay well i've always had a sensitive scalp even when I was a baby.
I'd have these little scabs on my head and then when I'd get them off my hair would come out with it.. well I got rid of all that as I got older but my scalp is still really sensitive.
I've never dyed my hair or anything becuase I've been really scared that it will mess with my scalp and make my hair fall out.
Is that true?
or is there any products that I could use for sensitive scalps?
Please help!
Yes, there are products for sensitive scalps. If you're wanting to dye your hair, there's special dyes out there without the harsh chemicals and they're pretty good, too. I used to use them a few years back because my hair is damaged.
I reckon you should explain your situation to a hair stylist and they will tell you which products would suit you best.
In the mean time, make sure you're using a shampoo and conditioner for your sensitive scalp - have you tried baby shampoo?
Ok i am 16 years old and i am still in high school and i make about 25 dollars a week thats all the time i have to work and i have saved up 200 dollars so i want to get a tatoo for i long time i have wanted one i want to know opinions i want either the chinese symbol for passion behind my ear or angel wings on me some wear now i dont want big angel wings they will be small but i'm not sure if i should get them on the top of my back or on my lower back or if i should just get my nose pierced but i want one of these things done so whats everyones opinion on this is it a good idea or a bad idea
You are unsure about the tatts, so if you MUST get one, go for the nose peircing. If you don't like it, it's not permanent.
Think about where you want the tatts and if you truly want those designs, don't just get them on a spur of the moment.
so i was talking about random stuff with some people and then this guy was like well atleast the nurse doesnt ask you to cough for her when you go to the doctor. So im guessing its a guy thing does anyone know what that means. sorry if this is in the wrong category.
I assume he means a "cough and drop" test.
The doctor will cup the testicals and ask you to cough.
From this, they can see if the testicals are in their proper position for adulthood and can also recognize tumours and hernias.
I'm 16f and my brother is 14. His room is next to mine. about two weeks ago I was looking for something ona a high up shelf in my room and I noticed a small hole in the wall. I looked through it but couldn't see anything. I didn't think anything about it and sorta forgot about it. Then like 5 days ago I was in my room getting ready for bed and right when I took off my bra and panties to take a shower I heard a noise right where the hole is. I was totaly wierded out and decide to check it out. The next day I went into his room and figured the hole is in his closet I went in there and saw his set up. He has a chair in there and a box of tissues (YUCK!!!!) From the hole, he can see most of my room including my bed. I was so scared since that means he's probably seen alot. I'm not a really bad girl, but I have snuck a few guys into my room when my parents were out and clothes have come off, and I do do things when I'm alone. I've had friends overnight and they've changed in my room. Now it's pretty clear I've had an audience. I'm totally pissed at my brother for doing this. Until now we get along great and I actually elt him hang out with me and friends becuase he's pretty cool. I really want to tell my parents on him but two things stop me. First my brother might turn the tables and tell my parents that I've had boys over, which they absolutely don't allow. Second, my dad has a really bad temper and is very strict. He'd probably whip my brother's ass off (I mean it, my dad still uses the belt on his bare ass if my brother doea something really wrong. 10 or fifteen stripes is pretty typical for a beating. It leaves my brother howling and he cant sit for days) and then who knows what he's do to me over the boys. I'm too embarassed to talk to my brother because he's seen so much. So I don't know what to do. I can't even cover the hole since my room was painted in this custom purple and we don't have any left. Any paint there would clash. Any advice?
Cover up that damn hole, whether you jam something in there or simply cover it up with a photograph/poster.
Then talk to him in a way which won't make it embarrassing for either of you.
"There's a hole in my room that leads to yours".. see what he says about it.
If you cover it up and you see any more appearing..then that's when you need to tell your parents.
I understand you want to protect him from your parents wrath, but 14 years old is old enough to know what he is doing is wrong.. and maybe a punishment is in order if he doesn't learn his lesson this time.