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Pluto

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waterbender =D haha, I'm such a nerd.

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18

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July 7, 2005

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September 21, 2006

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Hi. I left and came back. But I don't like this column anymore. Check out my new column.

http://www.advicenators.com/column.php?u=thefish

advice

Usually i'm really good at giving advice. but this time it's been quite hard to deal with. i was in love with peter when he was a junior and i was a sophomore. i was too shy to talk to him, but he was just soo hot. but he moved away to washington state(and i live in illinois) when he was a senior and i forgot about him and i found him on myspace. then we started talking and it grew stronger and we talked on the phone every night and we like fell in love.. maybe. then he decided to move back here mainly so we could be together. we rushed into things and it didnt work out at all. on and off. now we're officially done and we havent really talked in a month or so.
i know id ont need him because he'll be 19 and he doesnt plan on going to college or taking classes, he constantly lied, and we never went out-to eat or movies-or nething. it was such a wasteful relationship.
but i cant seem to stop thinking about him lately. love songs or whatnot. i see him at the store and we do the 'hi' but thats bout it. ive seen him with a girl and i got pretty pissed. i dont think they're dating, but this girl is the most annoying girl in the world-so im not jealous of her-but i might be jealous that she gets to at least be with him. but why would i care if he's not even that great of a person??
sorry so long!

You only care because you're attached to him. Even with all you know about him, in your mind you still think of when you were younger and lusted after him constantly. That's normal. Associating the songs with him is normal too. When you find someone else--and you will--you will associate these songs with that person. But you may still think fondly of Peter. That's not bad, as long as you realize that's it's just a fond memory--that was who you were and this is who you are now. You're not actually a different person, but you're at a different stage in your life. You seem to have a lot of built up feelings about him and I know a wonderful method for dealing with this. Get a spiral notebook and a pen, and write everything that's in your mind. Don't worry about grammar or spelling or making sense. Just write everything as you think it, and keep going until you feel better. It's also helps to cry, if you feel the need. This way you clear your mind and take out all your frustrations in a positive way, and also gives you time to think about the situation so you can figure out a solution.

Good luck,
Tasuki

can someone tell me things that people do if they DONT go to college?? im just wondering, im debating weather to go to college or not, but i have no clue what id do if i didnt go?

Personally I think it's better if you go to college. Without an education, the jobs you can get are pretty limited and mostly tend to suck. Maybe if you want to live alone it's okay to be a truck driver, but if you have a spouse and baby at home (or want that), then it's not a good idea. But that doesn't mean you have to go to college right away! It's perfectly acceptable to take a year off and work after high school or go to a community/tech college and later transfer to a four-year school. In fact, I think it's better that way. Most high school seniors are completely sick of school. They want to go for the next four years, just to get it over with. But many are just setting themselves up for disaster. They will burn out in college, and afterwards when they go straight from college into the rest of their life, they will regret it because they never had a chance to really live. I definitely suggest putting college off for a year, especially since you're not sure. My aunt wasn't sure if she wanted to go to college but as she said, "After a year of scrubbing toilets, I knew I had to."

If a guy tells you to have children when you're young; and then winks at you, does that mean anything? This happened to me with a guy friend of mine. First he started asking me if I wanted children. I said that I was still young (I'm 24) and had lots of time for that. Then he said to have them when I'm still young because I wouldnt want to be 60 when their 18. He has never had children himself (he's 41). This is when he winked at me. Do you think (because this is my theory), that this was his way of hinting he wanted to have children with me? Because obviously he wants them, and was telling me to have them young because if I waited until I was 40 to have his kids he would be in his 70's by the time our kids were in their teens.

I don't know. I don't think so. I do know that when you're older there is a higher chance of birth defects and miscarriages. Personally I think 24 is the perfect age. However, it's up to you. I think he was just being flirtacious when he said it. If he is just your friend, he wasn't being serious. If you were in a more committed relationship, then I would say it was serious. But then again, if he was serious he wouldn't have chosen such a vague way of saying it. He may not want children with you right now, but he atleast has a crush on you. Ask him out.

ok me and this girl liked each other for a while and she just broke up with her boyfriend and we liked each other while they were going out and now were prettty happy and ready to move on with eachother as a couple and today i found out that we might be 5th or 6th cousins, were not like some rednecks on jerry springer it was completley unexcpected and unwelcomed i wanted to know is 5th cousins to close for comfort?
should we just be cousins/friends or what..

If you're 5th/6th cousins, you're barely even related. I'm pretty sure that in most places, it's legal for 3rd cousins to get married. Don't worry, this isn't considered incest by most people.

I am a male, 15, and lately I've been wondering about something. There are many girls in our school and grade. I am a gentleman and open doors, get chairs, etc. for the girls. It is pretty much the same way with my friends, we are all like that. But the girls in our school keep saying they like "skaters" or "skaters are soo hot" and we really are wondering what is wrong with us. Not to boast, but all of us are good looking. The girls just keep talking about "skaters." So why is it like this, and do girls not like gentlemen or something?

It's just a style that girls think looks good. But it's true that girls like "bad boys" more than the perfect gentleman. They don't really like the boys that will actually get them into trouble--just guys that look rebellious. Girls need adventure. A guy who is always nice is boring. Don't get me wrong, the other extreme isn't great either. It's good to be in the middle. It's strange but, some guys I've known who wear jewlery and ripped jeans, the kind you would think were disrespectable punks, actually turned out to understand the way I felt as a girl. The same way, I've known some guys who were all about being poilte and "respecting" me, but they didn't know how to have fun (they didn't have any empathy, either) and I always felt uncomfortable around them. But basically, "skater" is just a style of clothing that some girls find appealing--it's your attitude that counts.

is there a website where it will let me watch episodes of "the oc" from the first seasons and recent ones too?

You can try youtube.com or bitorrent.

How come my picture for my column wont load all the way.the loading bar reaches the top then stops? Anyone know why?

It's probably too big of a file! Files take up space, and your internet probably can't handle such a large amount. Try finding a smaller picture to use.

i'm a 14/f

when i masterbate i bleed and hurt a ton!

i used to do it all of the time, but lately i havn't bc it hurts to badly

why do i bleed everywhere?!

Masturbation is supposed to feel good, not hurt! And you should definitely not be bleeding! I know it's embarassing, but go see a doctor. You can only benefit from it! If you have to tell your mother about it and don't want to bring up masturbation, just say that you think you injured yourself there. Then she does not have to be in the doctor's room with you, and you can (or you should, anyway) be able to explain it to the doctor.

is there anyplace i can find a crochet bikini prefferebly in a brown and a black, olive green, and a hot pink

ps. i'd appreciate it if you didn't tell me online stores like victorias secret cause i ordered two things from there that didn't fit me and had to pay shipping and handling lol to sum it up please don't tell me online stores cause i don't know if they will fit

thanks ♥

I can't think of any off the top of my head. But if anybody gives you online stores, that is a good thing. If you find something you like, you can go to the real life store and ask about it. Also, I think you should try going to different stores and asking people. If someone tells you exactly where to go, well to me that would take the fun out of shopping! I love going to different stores and looking at everything, and comparing prices. Sorry I couldn't give you any stores, but I'm sure if you look around you will find something wonderful. And it will feel better because you found it yourself, not because it was handed to you.

what was the code forthe google search box? how do you do it? and will it work on myspace?

thankkks

I think it only works here on advicenators.

But it was this:

[*search]baby names[*/search], removing the *s. And using the /search is an absolute must!

can you guys tell me anything you can about limewire. past expierences, problems, things you liked, things you didnt like, do you think its worth it to DL it.

thanks!!

It gave me spyware and wrecked my computer!

So i'm a 14/f and (i live in a very weathy area,but am not rich)i have a disability called Cerebral Plasy, it effects the way i walk and is VERY noticeable.At school i am not popular ( not that that is very important) and people look down on me because of my disability. What they dont understand is that i am just like them: i am a girl who can talk and be fun and loves music and shopping and girly(ish)thing> what they dont understand is that i am just LIKE THEM. I am not saying i want to be a clone of them or anything, i just wish that they wouldnt judge me for my disability instead of getting to know me because i am JUST LIKE THEM (but not a judgeing bi***).
It is the same way with boys too. The problem is i was trained to be shy because i know they judge me, but i am not shy with friends of family.
What can i do to show them that i am not just some freak.

The reason they don't understand you is simply that; they do not understand. A lot of them have been raised in so-called normal families. You know, the dream kind where nobody has anything wrong with them? Actually, I don't believe that. Everybody has their share of problems. But people seperate themselves into distinct social groups VERY early in life. In preschool they teach us that everybody is different, but it doesn't really help. We learn what we know from interacting with other people and usually the conclusion we come to is that different is bad. So while these kids logically know that you are a person just like them, deep inside they are not sure how to act. They might think that if they hang out with you, people will see them as being different. Also, they might feel very sorry for you and think that you would find this insulting. How do you know they look down on you? Do they actually try to hurt you? Or do they, for the most part, ignore you? If they are just ignoring you, you need to make yourself noticeable. If you're good at art/writing, there might be a literary magazine or a newspaper you could join. Or drama club, chorus, etc. Whatever you're good at. Don't wait for people to come to you--go out to them! They'll only know who you are if you MAKE them. However, if it is that they are actually trying to hurt you, go to your parents, the principal, etc. They will help you, for bullying is a crime against humanity and also a literal crime that can be punished by law! Remember that everybody is judged and everybody judges other people. Even you are judging some of these people; maybe some of them are shy as well, not mean. If it wasn't the CP, it would be something else, like the shape of your eyes or the unusual music you like. People single out differences--it's not right, of course, but it's part of life. You can overcome it.

okay theres this bed thing & i meant to sit on the matress, missed and sat on this bar thing in the..wrong area. i was in so much pain i dont even know. ima girl but i totally missed & landed & it hurt so bad. i don't know if like..idk!! id feel stupid going to the gyno. er something its so embarrasing!! i was in so much pain though because i like hopped on it to juss sit down & do hw & totally missed!! what should i do??

thanks!!

One time I did a split and I strained something in that general area. It went away a couple of days later. I'm sure if you just wait it out, it will go away. You may want to tell your mother or (if you don't have one) another female role model. If it's been a few days and it still hurts a lot you will have to see a doctor. That's all you can do.

omg. my best friend in the world is being a slut. i mena i love the chick to death but her ex-boyfriend who used her then broke up with her to have "fun" over the break are doing any SEXUAL THING U CAN THING OF. theyve tried haveing sex 3 times but dude. the guy doesnt even like her and isnt planning on even asking her out. and shes inlove with him. hes such a man whore and i told her that she can pick up desises and stuff like that but she acts like she didnt even do anything wrong. i dont know how to tell her to stop without coming off as a controlling freak you know. I LOVE HER TO DEATH but i dont want to yell at her and make it to where she cant tell me stuff anymore. PLEASE HELP! what do i do.
ps. SHES TWELVE.

This doesn't really make her a "slut", but obviously she is playing with fire here. She's setting herself up to be hurt. There may be nothing you can do about this, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try. Remind her that YOU are her friend and that you really care about her and don't want to see her hurt. It's more about the diseases, there is a lot of emotion involved in sex.

What about her parents? I know you don't want to be a tattle-tale, but if she completely blocks you out you may have to go them. However, if you think that they would react badly and punish her for this, it might be better to talk to a teacher or school counselor that you can trust.

I got an offer to start babysitting but I have a probllem. Its really stupid but, Ive seen the commercials to "When A Stranger Calls" the new horror movie about the girl babysitting. Im afraid that when I babysit a) IT WILL HAPPEN.. or b) Ill be too freaked out and the kids will get scared, or I wont be able to take care of them because Im too scared. It will also be my FIRST time babysitting. What can i do to make myself feel safer?!

The chances of that happening are really rare. But even if you are freaked out, you need to put on a tough face because you are supposed to be responsible. I'm assuming that this is during nighttime. Lock all the doors and do not let anybody in. If it is the parents, they will have a key. Be safe over the phone, too. Don't mention to anybody that you're the babysitter, just say that ____ is unable to come to the phone and take a message. When we see scary things, it can take a while for it to sink in that it's not reality--even if we know that logically. Just keep repeating it to yourself and from now on watch cartoons about happy rainbow ponies or something. Hollywood is trying to sell people's souls; ignore it. When commercials like that come on, mute or turn off the TV. Trust me, you won't be too scared. When you're the only adult with a bunch of kids, your instincts sort of kick in. You'll be able to handle it.

how do you give a lap dance. i need help

This site might help: http://www.funadvice.com/?xq=2315

I have this friend, who told me that she thought she might like this guy, and added him to her 'list' of guys. There were maybe 3 guys that were on her list of people she could potentially like. I knew all of them, and found out that one of the guys was in my homeroom and one of my classes. I was supportive of my friend's feelings for all the guys on her list, and kept away from them, but I found myself sort of attracted to this one guy. I started to like him, and my friend found out. I felt (and still feel) horrible, and apologized in person, over aim, over the phone and i wrote a really long letter, but she ignored me every time. She also brought a bunch of my other friends into it and they took her side, and pretty much stopped talking to me. they were my four best friends, and now they hardly even look my way. i don't know what else to do, so i've sort of just...given up. but i couldn't help it, i felt terrible, and tried really hard to make it up to her...is it so much my fault that i deserve to lose those friends?

by the way: i'm a freshman in high school, girl, 15.

It's not your fault at all. She is overreacting. People are attracted to other people. This can be confusing, especially when you're a teenager. You may be attracted to fifteen people at once, and then the next day not care about any of them. We can't help who we're attracted to. Furthermore, she had NO claim on this guy. So she thought she "might" like him, does she even know him that well? For all she knows, he may have a girlfriend in another school. People aren't property, and you did nothing wrong. Stop apologizing to her. It's going to be hard, but you just need to give up on her for now. Hang out with some other people. When you run to her begging forgiveness, that tells her that you're weak. Ignoring her will show that you have confidence. It may completely blow over, and she may want to be friends with you again. If that happens, it is your choice whether or not you want to accept her. I personally wouldn't. If these were my best friends, I would really not want to deal with my worst enemies. You desreve much better than that.

ive got paint shop pro 8, when i upload a picture/image and try making a blend, its too small, where can i got to resize the images?

You can resize it in PSP8! I don't have that particular program, so I don't know how exactly to do it. But in pretty much all graphics programs if you go to a menu on the top there is a way to resize it. In Adobe Photoshop 2, it's Image>>Resize and in Corel Painter 8 it's Canvas>>Resize. Just look in the menus on the top until you find something that looks good, then click it. I learned everything I know about computers by doing that.

So I'm a 17 year old female, and I need to give you a little back story so you can better understand this. This past week and a half, this boy and I got close working on the school play together. He was really flirty and I was flirting back. Then on Saturday, I found out he went out with this girl the night before that he's been pining after for a while, and she told him that she likes him back. The flirting kind of ended for a day, and then it started back up a little by Sunday. I know that this is just a weekend, but I fell hard.
My question is, should I tell him that I like him, just to let him know, or should I let it go and let him be happy with this other girl?

Some guys don't think it means anything to flirt. To them, they are just joking around with a friend. But that is no reason to hold in your emotions. I think you should tell him. That way you atleast get it off your chest, and who knows? He might end up liking you more than this other girl. I wouldn't get my hopes up about that one, but I think it's best that you tell him.

Are guys supposed to masturbate? This was a big issue at school today. I was wondering if most guys masturbate. K thanks .. ♥ Tiff

Nobody's really "supposed" to. There is no law that says "You must masturbate or pay a fine." But most people do, males and females alike. We can't help wanting sex and masturbation is the healthiest way to deal with sexual frustration. You can't get STDs from your hand, or get it pregnant/get pregnant from it, etc. The short answer is yes, they do.

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