Chances of you getting pregnant from that are extremely rare. Slim to none.
There is pre-ejaculate that can come out before the guy knows it, and if I'm not wrong, that actually contains the most sperm.
However, since there was no insertion, and (I'm assuming) he didn't ejaculate, the chances are extremely rare.
Air supposedly kills sperm, too, so to me it sounds like you're pretty safe.
If you're worried, though, keep track of your periods and if you intend to become sexually active anytime soon or if there's any chance you might end up sexually active, try to get on some form of birth control first for your peace of mind.
But from what you told me, you've got nothing to worry about. There's a reason virgin births are rare, lol.
Hope this helps!
-Siren =)

Well you're a step ahead of where I was when my guy and I started getting sexual. I never used tampons, lol.
Anyway, fingering shouldn't hurt. Let him start using just one finger (especially if he has big hands/fingers), and move to two. I doubt you'd be too tight if I wasn't. Fingering doesn't all happen internally, you know (and I hope he knows). A woman's clitoris is like THE sex organ for her. He'll figure that out fast if he doesn't already know. If something hurts you, don't be afraid to say "ow", and don't be afraid to guide his hand a little...if you know what you like, teach him.
As far as how it is when he does it, you'll just have to find out! It's different for every girl - it feels good, it shouldn't hurt, and - oh yeah. Make sure he doesn't have sharp fingernails, 'cause those hurt. ^^
You've got nothing to worry about. Just let him lead and go along with it.
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

Well I'm not completely sure, so don't hold me to this, but I'll give you my best guess.
When your hymen is broken by inserting something, it can hurt - especially if you're young/aren't sexually active/experienced, etc. That also usually doesn't bleed for days on end. When my hymen was broken it just looked like I'd gotten my period early, and didn't last any longer than a night.
However, that does vary depending on the person.
If your periods have a history of being irregular, this may be your period.
If you cut yourself, you probably would've felt it.
To me, it does sound like you managed to break your hymen, which could almost go along with cutting yourself.
If you're sore down there, leave it alone for awhile and see if it stops feeling sore. If not, you might want to consult a doctor.
My best guess is that you "popped your cherry," so to speak, and it's nothing to worry about.
Hope this helps!
-Siren =)

Honestly, I'm not sure I can really help you, but I'm going to try. If you need someone - not a shrink or whatever - to vent to, I'm here, and I'll listen.
I'm gonna break this down into a few problems.
The first one you've got is you're a decent guy who fell in with the wrong girl.
You said yourself "i really take peoples feelings into consideration", and I sincerely applaud you for that. I think though, she went wrong in assuming that you "like every other guy" thought sex was just sex. It seems as though that's the way she thinks. Some girls think of sex as the ultimate expression of love and devotion (that's my view on it), and some girls think of it as a purely lustful act that doesn't mean anything except pleasure (that is surprisingly common nowadays).
How much did you talk with her about your feelings dealing with sex before you went ahead with it? If she assumed you felt the same way about it as she did ("sex is just sex") then she probably didn't think it was important for you to know what she'd done.
Either that, or she has some emotional issues she hasn't told you about. How much do you know about her family history? Did her mom sleep around before marrying her dad? Did her mom cheat on her dad? It could all be in the way she was raised.
I'm glad you didn't listen to the shrinks or whoever said to sleep with another girl. This girl obviously doesn't realize what a catch you are.
You may have found out more than you wanted to know, but you needed to know it. You need to know what kind of girl she is (not passing any judgements, just a statement). I mean, would you really want to (hypothetically) marry this girl and not know about her past?
Reading her basic responses to things you've asked her indicate to me that she's trying to hide something from you - either she's trying to protect you from knowing the truth, or she's trying to protect herself. I think she has a nasty past. A lot of girls that sleep around had troubled childhoods, or parental issues. Did you ever ask her why she slept with the other guys?
Maybe she slept with them for the same reason you smoke. Maybe she just felt she couldn't have handled life if she didn't have a release. Instead of taking up smoking, she took up sex. Both are dangerous, and both are "relaxants" so to speak.
As far as you talking to everyone you can and listening to their advice to "accept her," you know what? You don't have to accept her if you can't, and if she can't accept you. If being in a relationship with her is hurting you this much, did you ever consider that you could be happier without her?
I mean granted, it is nice to have someone there, but really, weigh your decisions. She's HURTING you more than helping you.
I totally understand that you lost your virginity to her, and you probably want to stick with her, but you should never feel that you HAVE to stick with her because you lost your virginity to her. I know you don't want to hear this, but there really are plenty of other girls out there who would be more understanding, and want a more sensitive guy who takes peoples' feelings into consideration.
Another problem she might have is that she might not be used to a sensitive guy, which you seem to be. She might have been abused when she was younger and she might have learned to be defensive to save herself pain, and she didn't think now. If she's used to someone she has to scream at or snap at to get along with, she's gonna have trouble adjusting, even after three years.
As far as the looking to god part of this, I believe more in fate than in god.
For instance, fate threw both me and my boyfriend some bad relationships and nasty breakups, and by the time we met each other, we both knew (know) how to make a relationship work.
Don't let a girl make you question your beliefs.
I'm going to emphasize the fact that you don't HAVE to stick with her if she's hurting you this much. You broke up with her once. What made you go back to her? Was it just the idea of a girlfriend that you wanted, or was it really honestly her you wanted back?
My relationship wasn't totally perfect a few months ago. My mother told me to take a look from the outside and make sure it wasn't the idea of him I was attracted to, rather than the real him. Check yourself.
Make lists of things about her you like and things about her you dislike.
As for her saying "it's none of your business", it certainly IS your business. You're her current boyfriend, and if you're sleeping with her you're also connected to the rest of her past...hate to bring that up, but it's true.
The first thing you need to do, if you're so completely determined to stick with her, is figure out why she is the way she is. Instead of talking to her about why it bothers YOU so much, try talking to her about why it doesn't bother her, and why she did the things she did. If you understand her, you might be able to tap into some ways to get her to understand you - find similarities.
Really though, if you're the kind of guy I think you are, you care about keeping her happy. What you need to do right now is keep yourself happy. Consider the way you are now, and the way you were without her.
Yes, you would probably be lonely without her. But you wouldn't have to deal with her not understanding you and not trying to understand you.
The final decision is yours obviously, but please take everything into consideration before you decide to stay with her or to break up with her.
I hope I helped on some level - if you want to bounce ideas or thoughts off of me, my screen name's SirenCytherea on AIM, and my e-mail is DemonIre1024@hotmail.com
I check my e-mail every night, and I'm on line almost every night.
If anything happens like a breakthrough in her understanding you or you understanding her, let me know. (If you want). If you choose not to, good luck, and I hope things improve...no one deserves to be treated so uncaringly.
-Siren =)

Well the only way to really know is to ask. No one can read minds, and we sure as heck can't tell what's going on with guys when they do the things they do. Maybe he's just stressed and needs some alone time. But you won't know unless you ask.
I suggest you call him, or go to his house one day and ask him what's going on. Don't be too confrontational about it, just point out that you feel like you're being ignored, and you're worried about the relationship. Ask him if he's okay, and if there's anything you can do to help.
Don't accuse him ("You've been ignoring me for a month. What the eff is going on with you?")
Just point out the obvious (to you): "I feel kind of ignored, and it's been bothering me for awhile. I'd like to know what's going on. Is it something I did?"
It's easier to avoid a fight if you're accusing yourself of something instead of him. If you accuse him he'll get all defensive and may not answer your question at all. Just be gentle about it.
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

I'm a novice writer myself and I have a series going.
I love to edit and help though, 'cause when I first started writing my prose sucked and I know a lot more about it now. If you'd like to e-mail it to me, I'd be happy to give you a little feedback, but you've gotta let me know how blunt (or not) you want me to be.
My e-mail's DemonIre1024@hotmail.com
As far as websites, if I knew of any, I'd be on them myself. Lol. Sorry I can't help with that, but I'd be happy to help you edit/improve your story!
-Siren =)

I think it depends on what you and your guy are comfortable with. If he's cool with you making out with him after you've swallowed and had his dick in your mouth, go for it.
It's really a personal preference. If not right after, try popping a mint and then going back to make out with him. (That's my technique, even though my guy's cool with it.)
If he's not cool with it, I say just chill and talk for awhile, cuddle...you know.
Hope this helps!
-Siren =)

Hi James. Okay, if you're having pain or buring or whatever, you've gotta see a doctor. It's not easily diagnosable without an MD, which means unfortunately that I can't tell you what it is.
I can, however, tell you that it's most likely not an STD because you said you didn't have sex with anyone. An STD is a sexually transmitted disease, and generally if you haven't had sex, you're not at risk.
I'm not sure what to do to get rid of it - you might try taking a warm bath. Make sure you keep it clean. It could be a urinary tract or a bladder infection. Don't hold me to that, though.
Do you have any weird markings, or rash-type-things anywhere on your penis? Make a note of all that, and definitely go see a doctor.
Don't be afraid to ask me anything else you might need help with.
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

There's a lot to talk about, especially if you met him through someone else! Try talking about bands you like, politics (if you're into debating), religion...or on a lighter note, you could try talking about your childhoods. Ask him during a lull in conversation "what were you like when you were little?" and give him a story about you when you were a kid. Get the conversation going...that's of course, if you're comfortable talking about your childhood.
You don't always have to plan what to say - I tend to call my guy without anything to say, and we usually end up talking a lot anyway.
If he wants you to call him, chances are he'll help you out with keeping the conversation going once it's started.
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

I suggest you let him meet your guy friends, or drag him along when you go to see them. If he meets them, he might feel less worried.
My guy and I had a fight, sorta, about that. I have a lot of guy friends too, and when I introduced him to them, he told me later he didn't know why he was so worried.
I'm not so sure it's you your boyfriend doesn't trust - it might be other guys. That was my guy's issue. But talk to your guy and find out why he's so untrusting. Maybe he had a problem with another girlfriend and he's a little scarred from that.
Take him with you when you go see your guy friends - not every time, just a few times. Also, Do you hang around with your guy and his friends?
If you don't, ask to tag along with him and "the boys" every once and awhile. That way he can see how you are around other guys, and that you don't even flirt with anyone else.
I strongly reccomend you talk this out with your guy - let him know how much it bothers you that he doesn't seem to trust you.
Also, trust really is a huge thing in relationships. If there's no trust, there's no real relationship. He's gotta be able to trust you or it'll never work, and you might wanna tell him that.
All you can do is tell him this stuff and try this stuff out - he's going to have to learn to trust you on his own. He's gotta decide that you're trustworthy by himself. You can tell him you are all you want, but if he doesn't believe it it won't matter.
Talk it out. Talking fixes a LOT.
(Trust me, I've gone through this (sorta))
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

Sweetie, if you're not comfortable with the way stuff is going in your relationship, talk about it. If talking about it doesn't do anything, it's time to let go.
This guy sounds like he doesn't respect what you want and need. Think about the way he does and says things. You say you fight all the time? The relationship used to be great? "Used to be" are your keywords.
You have a couple of choices. You can try talking to him again and letting him know that you've considered breaking up with him but haven't because you would be nothing without him. (if you haven't already told him that)
You can just break it off and give up.
Or, you can try to go with some of his wants. What's your reasoning behind not wanting to touch him? Are you just uncomfortable? If so, does he know that?
Never push yourself, or let anyone push you to do something you're uncomfortable with.
You are your own person. Never let yourself think that you're nothing without someone else. It sucks to be single if you had a relationship you were happy in, but really think about it. Are you happy now? If not, maybe you would be happy single.
It's your decision to make obviously, but please consider everything before you make your decision(s).
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

When I was a freshman I slept about two hours a night and started getting major headaches. As soon as I started sleeping, the headaches stopped.
I doubt any of us here are doctors able to truly diagnose you, but my best guess is that you're suffering from sleep-deprivation headaches.
They suck majorly.
If you can't fall asleep at night, try meditating while you're laying down. If sounds distract you, try putting an aircleaner, or something with a steady, semiquiet noise in your room so you can listen to that.
I doubt there's anything major wrong with you. You're probably just not sleeping enough. Teenagers need about 9.25 hours of sleep a night to be fully rested (and sometimes more).
I hope this helps, and I hope your headaches stop!
-Siren =)

Plan to try to see each other at least once a week, and plan to call each other every other day (switch off. Have you call one day, him call the next time, then you, etc...)
Make one day a month (like the day you started dating (the fourteenth, or whatever)) one day you CAN'T make other plans, and you have to see each other.
E-mail, IM, write, do everything you can to stay in touch. It's not that hard to stay in touch if you're both willing to work at it.
That's kinda what my boyfriend and I do, and we're going to separate colleges.
I hope this helps, and good luck with your guy!
-Siren =)

The "cherry" is a girl's hymen, which is a thin piece of skin inside the vagina. It bleeds because when you break the hymen, you're basically tearing a hole in something (you don't feel it rip. It just kind of hurts (sometimes a little, sometimes a lot. Depends on the girl)). There's no bubble or anything, so I really couldn't tell you how the slang turned into "pop" a girl's cherry.
Tampons don't necessarily break your hymen. But I think if you do break your hymen using tampons, there's a bit of pain involved. I'm not entirely sure about that, as mine wasn't broken that way, but I'd think so. When you bleed from breaking your hymen, though, it looks different than menstrual blood, I think. There are no clots or anything. It's just like...blood. Breaking your hymen happens more often during sex than anything.
I hope this helps a bit!
-Siren =)

A great one that people don't usually think of is childhood. "What were you like as a little kid? What kinds of stupid stuff did you do?"
That kept my boyfriend and me on the phone for literally three hours.
You often find a lot out about someone by asking what they were like as a kid.
If you like to debate, talk about religion, and what you REALLY think happens after death. (Slightly morbid, but it is a good conversation topic.)
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

What is it with people and giving moron answers? "Popping your cherry" is the slang term for breaking your hymen.
Your hymen is a thin piece of skin in your vagina that breaks when you have sex (which is why sex hurts the first time, and why some girls bleed.) It is possible to break your hymen horseback riding, by using a tampon, or fingering yourself, or some other semiviolent activities, but most often it's done during sex.
I hope this helped!
-Siren =)

By long and flowing, I mean your airstream should be connected. Like slurred, but not slide-y. It's a little hard to explain without being able to demonstrate it.
Basically, unless there are rests, there shouldn't be much space between your notes.
Hope I helped!
-Siren =)

The 6 means there are six beats to a bar. The 8 means the eighth note gets the beat.
Like, if you're counting in 2/4, there are two beats to a measure and the quarter note gets the beat.
What I mean by "gets the beat" is that you think of eighth notes as quarter notes, and quarter notes as half notes - everything gets doubled.
I haven't sung this solo, but if you want pointers on it, I do teach voice - IM me or e-mail me. I'll look up the piece for you and see if I spot anything that might give you trouble. All I can think of at the moment is "use a lot of air to keep your phrases smooth." Mozart is all about smooth and flowing phrases, even when there's stacatto. But if you have any music questions, don't hesitate to talk to me. I'm a voice major in college in the fall. ^_^
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

Old blood turns brown - it's just old. Either your cycle is ending, or at the very beginning. It can be brown if your period is light. When there's heavier bleeding it's usually red, and lighter could be pink or brown.
But anyway, you have nothing to worry about. It's totally normal.
Hope this helps!
-Siren =)

The pill is about 98% effective, and condoms are like 97% - put together there's an increase to about 99.9%.
So your chance of pregnancy is about .1%.
Him taking it out when he comes is all well and good as long as he keeps the condom on. If he doesn't, it's just as bad as not having a condom on. Make sure he holds onto the bottom of the condom when he pulls out.
Also, the pill's great. I'm glad you're on the pill. Just make sure you take it at the same time every day, etc.
The chance that you could get pregnant is disgustingly low, so relax. You've got nothing to worry about.
I hope this helps!
-Siren =)

I'm a laid-back 26 year old with a Psychology BA, starting my MA program, and working my way into the field as quickly as I can. It took me an extra Bachelor's degree (in vocal performance and creative writing) to figure it out, but I was put on this Earth to help, to heal, and to love.

I have made the decision to dedicate my life and career to helping others. I am here to do just that.

I've been a member since 2004, and since I signed up, I've gone through quite a lot and learned quite a lot from it. I'm here to give guidance where I had none; no one should have to go through the difficulties I went through alone.

Feel free to visit my website/blog, if you want to read my experience with domestic violence and my thoughts on it.

***While I do tend to answer mental health and other health-related or medicine-related questions, I am by NO MEANS a licensed physician or practitioner of any sort. Any and all advice I give for these questions is from my own experience or studies.***

If you need to get a hold of me quickly, my screen name on AIM is SirenCytherea. Just let me know you found me here.

I'm a strong believer in the idea that there are no stupid questions except the ones left unasked, so, please, keep an open mind, heart, and mouth.

Siren

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