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Razhie. Advicenators Member Since: June 13, 2005. Answers: 5077. Visitors: 211514.
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The Question
i was friends with benefits with this guy for a year and just recently he got back together with his ex. they've been going out for 2 weeks and he wants to have phone sex with me already. for me its tempting but i dont want to be the girl he cheats with because i consider phone sex as cheating but he thinks that as long as we're not physical then its not cheating. what do you guys think?
The Answer
Block him on the computer, ignore his calls and never give him the time of day again.
You are right and he is drastically and horribly wrong. Do this with him and you will be the "Girl he cheats with" as far as anyone with half a brain is concerned.
Phone sex is most certainly cheating unless he and his new girlfriend have agreed otherwise and I can't imagine for a moment that she has given him the go ahead to have phone sex with others.
He has just proven himself to be the lowest kind of player and manipulator. That isn't acceptable in any kind of friend. A friend with benefits arrangement is rather high risk, they can get you sick, you could end up pregnant or you could just end up hurt. So friends with benefits NEED to be sensible and respectful people or you are going to be caused endless pain by them.
This guy is a moronic, lying, cheater. He is no friend. Cut him out of your life.
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The Question
This question is mainly for guys.. but girls can answer too =)
Well lately Ive been frenching these really hot guys in nightclubs... although I had my first kiss not a long time ago. I know that its not just experience that counts towards being a good kisser... but how can I tell if Im good by the guy's expression? Is there some trick to tell by how he reacts? I mean, most of them smile and lean in again after a little while but maybe they just want some... idk =/. So anyway is there a good way to tell from a guy if you're a good kisser.. without asking?
Thankyouu
The Answer
You could alter your genetic code giving yourself super-duper physic powers!
Or you could just take them wanting to kiss you some more as a good sign.
Um ... So, in short, no.
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The Question
okay this might be a little wierd and all but a guy who saw my vagina before didnt say anything to me but i guess spread the word to all his friends that i have a weird vagina. it kinda hurt.. is this possible can i really have a weird vagina?? or are all these guys just really immature
The Answer
Really immature.
Sort of obnoxious and stupid too.
Save yousrelf some trouble and don't show immature people your vagina eh?
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The Question
My boss gave me diamond earrings for Christmas. I am a married woman and he is a married man.
I know his wife thinks this was an inappropriate present. I am torn. What should I do?
The Answer
I agree it's not quite an appropriate present.
Is there an inappropriate relationship?
If there is, return the earrings and find another job. Fooling around with the boss is a dumb idea, at best.
If not. Accept the earrings (as I'm sure you already have) and express your gratitude, but tell your boss in a friendly but firm manner, that the gift was too much, and you'd be much happier with something smaller in the future.
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The Question
Heres the deal, I'm 18 and I've never been on a date or kissed a boy. (I know, wow, Never?!?! At 18?!?!) I'm going to be going on my first date soon. I feel so awkward about the fact that I've never dated before, especially since he has. I just want to know, you know, since I'm not in middle school it's not like some hanging out with a friend type of thing. But I've never been able to do that part to get used to dating. And I'm not going to be like, talking about some big forever relationship either. What do we talk about? Should I be like, hanging out, having fun, talking about nothing important. Or like asking him questions about himself or something. Or if I just try to go with whatever come will it be awkward at some point? Just give me some general first date tips I guess so I do feel so nervous about going into it, please.
The Answer
Just talk, hang out, have fun and talk about nothing important.
Like you said, you aren't looking for a mate, just someone to date! So you don't need to figure out his views on pre-martial sex, child rearing and fisical planning in one evening. Figuring out what music he likes or what games he enjoys is plenty good enough.
Just go with whatever comes and YES! YES, it will get awkward at some point. I can garentee it. I've never been on a first date that didn't get awkward at some point. If you want, have a joke or a story about friends prepared, but it probably better if you just think through what he has told you and see if you can ask any questions about things he has said. That will come off more natural.
Just don't let the awkward minute turn into an awkward half hour and you'll be just fine.
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The Question
I've been seeing this guy mark for quite a while and i really like him. I'm 18 and he's 21. But I hate the fact that he goes to strip clubs! I think its completely disgusting and degrading towards women! No one would like their man getting a lap dance from a naked girl and feeling all up on her! Not to mention their completely nasty sluts! I dont think it's worth the 10 bucks at all for that and especially if he has a good women that can do the same damn thing for free! It's a complete insult to me and it's a slap in the face...like im not good enough to get him turned on that he has to go waste his money and watch nasty whores dance! He keeps talking serious with me and saying he wants to be with me and wants me to move some of my stuff into his place! But I don't think I can be in a serious relationship with someone that goes to strip clubs! I already knew he did that when I first met him, but I didn't care because I wasnt looking for a relationship and I was seeing other guys and keeping my options open. But now that it's getting serious and he's talking about offically being a couple, I don't want him to go there. And I know some of you are going to tell me that I should tell him how I feel and that I don't want him to go...But he already knows how I feel about strip clubs....he always tells me I look better than half the girls in there...but if thats so, than why the hell does he even go? He acts like im over reacting and like it's not a big deal. "Its not like Im taking them home with me" he says or "Its just like watching a porno!" And it doesn't help that Im not old enough to go in there and see what it's like and see exactly how bad it is. Also...I dont want to tell him to give it up because I dont want to be that controlling! His friends will make him feel stupid for not going with them anymore and act like Im being ridiculous and controlling him too much and that he needs to do his own thing. Then he will lie and go! I feel really strong about strip clubs and I don't like double standards. I hate how guys can do so much more that girls and get away with it!! I have half a mind to go to a party, pick out the hottest ones with the biggest dicks and have them all give me a lap dance at once and video tape it for him and be like "yeah...i didnt even have to pay for that amazing show" I bet I would get labeled all sorts of names but I think it's completely FAIR. But my point is, he would definitly not like me doing that, just like I dont like him watching girls strip. Im not going to be some peice of ass for him to go screw after watching a bunch of other women! If he can think of other women sexually than I can think of other men sexually! That's how I see it...anyone agree or have a simular issue?...Let me know!
The Answer
Alright babe. Take a deep breath.
Few issues here right:
1.) 'Nasty sluts' is neither true nor fair. This is a good trick for dealing with women for the rest of your life: Assume the best of them until they individually and personally prove you wrong. Frankly, hating all strippers or sex trade workers is no better then hating all Mexicans in my opinion. It shows an immaturity and want of tolerance that is unattractive in any person... Assume they are trying to make their way through school. Assume they are trying to support their young children. Few women want to strip. It sounds dumb I know, because it's not what you want on advice on. But I guarantee you, if you can develop some empathy for other women, ALL other women, you'll feel a bit better.
2.) His going to strip clubs has absolutely nothing to do with you. Notta. Zip. Ziltch. I think you already know this. I bet he has told you. He could be dating Aphrodite the Goddess of Love and he'd probably still want to hit the strip club from time to time.
4.) Men who cheat, cheat. Men who don't, don't. Women don't steal men away, men leave. More guys cheat each year with thier girlfriend's friends or with co-workers then with strippers. If you can trust your boyfriend with other women, you can trust him with strippers.
4.) If you have decided that giving him an ultimatum is not what you want and that you are not going to insist he not go then the only one with a problem here is YOU.
Who says it's not okay for you to get three free lap dances? Where is that written? Sure people will talk (hmmm, come to think of it they might call you a 'nasty slut' mightn they?) and they might think bad things of you. In fact they might think the same bad things of you that you currently think of your boyfriend!
For example: 'h my goodness. She must not be able to get a boyfriend!'
Or 'Shit, her boyfriend must be lousy/ugly/frigid if she needs to go out and do that!'
Them thinking that wouldn't make it true! You'd still love your guy! You'd still go home to him. You'd still probably find him more attractive then most of the guys there.
Yeah, he might get mad, which would make him a hypocrite.
However, going out and doing that not because you'd find it fun but simply to spite him would make you a malicious bitch not a warrior for equal rights, and that isn't right either.
So here is your choices as I see them:
You can tell him not to go, and be controlling and silly. (As you have said he will likely lie and then go anyways. Many happy relationships are maintained on such 'Don't ask. Don't tell' principals.)
You can change the way you are thinking of it and try to get over your negative feelings and hopefully discover you are dating a loving and respectful guy who just likes to hang out at strip clubs with his friends from time to time.
Or you can dump his hypocritical and strip-club-going ass and find someone who shares this particular value with you.
All of this shit, and I call it shit because it's useless, judgmental, insecure and some of it deeply irrational and self destructive, is going on in your brain! This is great, because that is the one thing in this relationship you can control completely!
However, if this really is a solid value for you, if you really can't simply accept that some loyal husbands, fathers, brothers and boyfriends occasion houses of ill repute, then you need to go find someone who doesn't.
Hopefully, when you are of age, you can go to one and realize it is mostly harmless ($10 cover? I promise you the one he going to is harmless, and probably has generally unattractive women.) Just keep your mind open and your heart respectful and tolerant.
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The Question
14/f
Ok so last year I met this girl and she's my best friend. We laugh a lot and have fun together. I've never had a real best friend because all of my friends turn their backs on me. But she's not like that.. lets call her Jane
Recently, Jane has been obsessed with boys... and I know that it's normal at this age... but this is just getting out of control. She's crushing on 3 different guys!!!
guy #1- her neighbor, she says that he is only a friend... but constantly wants to see him and spend time with him
Guy #2- Her ex, they've been together for about 1 or 2 months... He's one of my friends. He's always talking about her, and she's spending time with him
Guy #3- 1 year older than her, she just met him... I met him, he's very funny and nice. She calls him a lot on his phone and is always looking forward to seeing him at church.
GAH!! It's driving me insane!! I really like Jane as a best friend and I don't want to lose my friendship with her.. but it's just sooooooooooooo annoying because she is always talking/seeing/watching boys
I've confronted her about this, about 5 times, and I told her that I'm so annoyed that she is obsessed with boys. I keep asking her who she truely likes and she can't crush on 3 guys. She tells me " I know, I know, I know... but I like all of them and I don't know who i like the most!!!"
So for about 4 days, I've been ignoring her... because I want nothing to do with her life right now.
Is there anyway I can get her to focus on me more, and less on boys?? Or change her mind about them?
I need advice!
The Answer
Hmm. Honestly hun it doesn't sound to me like Jane is the one with the problem.
She can crush on three guys if she wants too. It doesn't sound like she is looking to settle down and get married; she is just enjoying the company of guys she likes. There is no crime in that.
You are the one with the problem here. You are jealous of the new people in her life. It doesn't matter at all that they are guys.
Take a deep breath and tell your friend the truth: That you miss her and miss feeling like her best. If you want to spend time with her, then tell her that too.
Then ACT like her best friend and listen to her. You don't have to do it all the time, but at least give her feelings a tiny bit of respect eh? They might be confused and silly, but they are still her feelings and it's no wonder she prefers these new people's company if all you have to tell her is that she isn't allowed to feel the way she does.
If you want to maintain this friendship there is going to have to be a give and take. She is going to have talk a bit less about guy and respect your feelings a bit more, and you are going to have talk a bit less about guys and respect her feelings a bit more.
Either that, or you can just keep ignoring her, in which case you'll definitely loose her as a friend.
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The Question
Ok so here it goes. my ex broke up w/ me lets say 3 months ago and we've stayed friends and wat not, but we've chilled like a lot kinda and we've had sex a lot even tho we're not togetha, its more than sex to me cuz im still inlove w/ him but im thinkin its just sex for him and like i wanna be with him so bad and i figure if thats the only way then i dont care, but im just making things worse for myself and i cant let go. i love this kid more than anything but i just dont know wat i should do. any advice?
The Answer
Oh, come on! You know exactly what you 'should' do, you just don't wanna.
You should walk away from a guy who is only using you for sex. You should be angry, hurt and upset, by yourself. You should eat ice cream, watch chick flicks, bitch about him to your friends and sing "I will survive!" at the top of your lungs, like normal, healthy dumped girls do.
You know you are hurting yourself. You know you are suffering. You know this isn't, and never will, improve.
You don't need to gradually let him go. You need to cut him out of your life like a cancerous growth.
You already knew all that. Sorry, no one here can make you do it. You will just get to keep on suffering until you do.
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The Question
I'm a 32-year-old female who has been having an affair during the last year with my 59-year-old married boss. I am madly in love with him and divorced my husband eight months ago to marry him.
He promised to divorce his wife, but so far there is no sign of divorce. I'm beginning to think I'm a big fool. What do you think?
The Answer
If you are 'madly in love' with a guy and still suspect he's made a fool of you, then he has definately made a fool of you.
Look for another job. You are in a dangerous position both professionally and personally as long as you stay where you are.
He has had plenty of time to offer you his devotion in return. He hasn't, and after a year, likely wont be. Do not loose anything else to this man. Take what you have left and get out.
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The Question
Our friend, "Jake," and my husband have helped each other out for years. Jake repairs our cars; my husband helps him out with his computer needs.
The last time we had trouble with our car, Jake said he'd look at it. He called later and said we needed new brakes, some adjustments, and that some of the fluids needed to be changed. He estimated the cost would be about $200.
When Jake finished the repairs, he brought our car back (instead of our picking it up like we usually do) and left a bill in the car for $400 -- $100 for brakes and fluids, $300 for labor.
We were shocked. Jake never charged for his labor before, and my husband has never charged Jake for working on his computer. We contacted a nearby auto repair shop to compare prices, and they quoted less than Jake charged us. Now we don't know what to say or do. Help!
The Answer
Talk to Jake. Even better if your husband does, since it seems that it was the two of them that had the arrangement. You don't need to be accusatory and certainly don't mention your price comparison, but you certainly can express your surprise and ask for an explanation of why he has decided to charge for labor now when he never has before.
It could be that he is no longer in the position to be charitable with his labor time or he might have had to have another person assist him and is charging on their behalf. He might simply feel the arrangement you had was not working for him.
His reason doesn’t need to be a good one but whatever it is, at least you will know. If you want to maintain the friendship, just pay the $400, and take your car elsewhere in the future. Perhaps if he has another issue with his computer your husband could suggest another computer repair shop to him.
Mixing bussiness and friendship doesn't always work out.
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The Question
When we were in our 20s, my best friend "Debbie" was an actress in several movies and television shows. Then she married, started a family and retired to be a stay-at-home mom. However, when she was just starting out and was desperate for work, she had a nude role in a movie. It wasn't pornography, but it was graphic.
Her sons are now in high school and college.
Last week, I was searching for her new e-mail address and did a Web search on the Internet. I found several pictures of her that had been taken on the movie set -- and those pictures could definitely be called pornographic.
I doubt if Debbie knows they exist, much less have been posted on the Internet. She is not much of a Net surfer, but her sons are. Should I tell her? Or should I keep my mouth shut and hope for the best?
The Answer
She has a right to know, and depending on the curcimstances, she may be able to have them removed.
Wouldn't you want someone to tell you?
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The Question
I need a non biasis answer. Is pot actually bad for you? I do not smoke, and I do not believe that I will ever. Someone close to me does and seeing that person high botheres me. To hear them talk about, be around it, or etc. bothers me. I think its wrong.. maybe I think its wrong because its against the law buuut I know its legal in other parts of the world.. so they wouldn't make it legal if it harmed you, would they? I just need some good advice on this... Am i overreacting when bothered about pot?
The Answer
Smoking pot from time to time will not ‘kill’ you the same way sliting your wrists or driving drunk could ‘kill’ you. It does not ‘kill brain cells’. Short-term use decreases the ability to learn and remember things and those effects can last for several weeks after smoking. As with smoking pretty much anything, there is a risk of emphysema and lung cancer.
Addiction is the real problem and that is where the serious trouble begins. Some people will claim marijuana is not addictive, and that is plainly false. Biologically speaking, most people do not become addicted to it as quickly as ‘harder drugs’ but addiction can happen, and when it does it’s just as destructive. The drug can become the most important part of a person’s life. Chronic marijuana smokers are more likely to develop psychosis and personality disorders and due to their decreased ability to learn new skills and problem solve they are less able to deal with those mental health issues. Jobs are lost, relationships suffer and marijuana ‘burn outs’ are dull, listless and basically incapable of living life. They have no interest in it.
I live in a part of the world where marijuana use is legal in many ways. I don’t believe it is a good idea, although I do maintain close friendships with many smokers. I’m not uncomfortable in choosing not to be around them when they are smoking, or telling them that I don’t want to hear about it.
I have seen what chronic smoking does to otherwise exciting and motivated people and I wouldn’t choose to be around those people. It steals their lives, they end up in the same jobs at 35 that they had when they were 25. They just seem stuck and they are plainly no fun to talk too. At the same time, I know some very successful and apparently happy people who indulge one or twice a month, or less. I think it’s a stupid idea on their part, but people are allowed to be stupid.
My best advice to you would be to shift your thinking like this: Pot is not a ‘bad, bad thing’ anymore then alcohol is a ‘bad, bad thing’. However, people’s behavior with these substances can be horrible! They can be abusive, destructive and they can be killing themselves or ruining their lives. So forget about the pot for a second and think about the rest of your friend’s behavior. Are they otherwise a loving friend? Do they have interests outside of pot and hobbies? Are they active and happy and enjoy learning new things?
Or are they dull? Obsessed? Is the drug more important then people they care about?
Judge each pot smoker, just like you would judge each person you know who enjoys a beer from time to time and if there is a problem with thier behavoir besides the smoking itself, speak up.
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The Question
would a guy be completely grossed out and turned off if he's hooking up with someone, and when he goes to finger her, she's super wet? haha is that normal? mmk thanks so much :]
The Answer
The facts of life are this:
Women get wet when they are aroused.
Having sex with a woman who is not aroused, i.e. a dry one, is painful for both the guy and the girl.
That is why lube exists.
A guy who was turned off by a girl's arousal (which basically means her body is preparing for intercourse) would be a deeply weird sort of guy in my opinion. What sort of guy doesnâ??t want the girl he is touching to be aroused?
It's normal. Stop worrying about it.
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The Question
okay so my sisters bday is coming up and i wanted to get her this:
http://www.coach.com/content/product.aspx?product_no=7457&category_id=240
but i need to know if its REAL leather. like hardcore coming from a cow....cause shes aa vegan....
thank yaaaa!
The Answer
It's leather, from a cow.
The description says it's made of leather. Coach is far too large a company to lie about that.
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The Question
Me and my boyfriend have sex all of the time and for some reason i get alot of hair and white pimples around my boobs its embarrasing and i want to know how to get rid of it. Some one said the hair is from your hormones racing? If anyone knows how to get rid of it please let me know thanks---
The Answer
I hate to be the one to break this to you babe, but that is just part of the beautiful thing called puberty.
Nearly all women have hairs growing around their nipples. It's not that your hormones are racing; it's just that you have hormones. So you grow hair. In a lot of places. Some women pluck the hairs or otherwise remove them, but they have nothing to do with your sexual activities. It's just your body becoming adult.
Small white bumps on the pink part of your nipple are also normal and are not pimples. They are called Montgomery glands. All nipples have them and they keep the nipple from drying out or cracking. Don't pick at them. They won't go away. You would miss them if they did go away: Your nipples would get sore all the time.
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The Question
So I really really like this girl, but she has me eating out of her hand. I can't stop, she's a master of manipulation. Or maybe I'm just nuts about her. Any thoughts that could help me out?
The Answer
Advice? Nah. All you need is a swift kick in the ass.
The nice thing is, most munipulative people will take it too far, sooner or later, and provide you with that swift kick that you need.
Apparently she just hasn't really abused you yet. You seem to know that she will, so it's your choice: You can stick around and keep worshiping her until she finally takes it too far, offends you, abuses you, breaks your heart, betrays you or any combination of the above OR you can take a step back, not let it get that far.
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The Question
my best friend says he is not gay but he lets me give him a blowjob at least twice a week is it ok and would that make him gay or bi
The Answer
I won't even get into whether or not that is okay. Just protect yourself for Christ’s sake. There are quite a few things you are exposing yourself too by performing oral on someone indiscriminately.
Take precautions, use a condom and don't take his word when it comes to your health! Although I don't think it's quite fair to label a guy who is willing to receive oral from another guy 'gay' or 'bisexual' against his wishes it certainly does make him 'guy who has trouble being honest with himself and others about sex' and 'guy who has casual sex partners'.
Protect yourself from the other people he is or has fooled around with.
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The Question
hey there... 16/f.
i recently posted a question about a ondition that, i believe, turned out to be a yeast infection.
i bought and used a monistat 3 pack from the pharmacy, and finished up using it tuesday night.
It's now Thursday morning.
My question: how long should i give it to clear up before i buckle down and see a doctor? I'm aware it isn't going to be fixed immediately, but I've already been dealing with this for quite some time and I don't want to wait any longer than I need to if I need to seek more treatment.
Also: if the redness / itching extends up to and around my anus, is that normal? will that also be cleared up with the Monistat?
thank you very much! Any advice or knowledge is highly appreciated!
The Answer
It will likely be Friday before you read this and if you are experiencing any itch, anywhere, right now then you should make a doctors appointment immediately, or better yet, go to a clinic today.
It's unusual for a yeast infection itch to spread to the skin around the anus.
Over the counter cures will likely not work on a yeast infection that has been left to fester for several weeks. That is why I suggested to you to a see a doctor, not buy a drug store cure. A yeast infection or any bacterial infection left that long can have a risk of spreading to other organs and can be too intense for the medication contained in non-prescription drugs.
Things like Monistat are really meant for women who have had yeast infections before, know exactly what they are like and catch the symptoms with in the first few days. It probably says right on the instructions that if you have never had a yeast infection before you should see a doctor before using the product.
If you aren't feeling perfectly and wonderfully fine right now, please go see a professional immediately. There are other issues you could have. ALWAYS be certain what the problem is before you try any treatment!
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The Question
when people say things about me ; i let it slip and slide. im not that person who starts the drama nor am i that person who takes things to seriously. but i let people get to me sometimes. for example;
my two best friends in the whoolle eentire warrld take advantage of me. i cant stand it. i dont say anything.
like they'll say some jokes about me and say there 'kidding' but , dude. deep inside it hurts. i meen its jokes they say over and over again . i just laugh with it and go on with my day.
i mean im that kind of person. usually things dont affect me. because im that kind of person who really doesnt care what ppl say about me. BUT. this is the first time that it hit me. Am i being too nice to let people to stomp on me? Am i not being taken seriously anymore? i need help! i need a way to stop this. and i know it wont do if i just say ; stop it hurts my feelings; because i alreday did that .
GR. its aggrivating me.
id appreciate it for the help!!
depressed deana
The Answer
As complicated as this feels, it is actually extremely simple. Tell your friends, calmly and respectfully, that you are getting hurt by thier jokes. Be specific about the jokes that are getting your goat and ask them to stop.
The only way to be taken seriously is to take yourself seriously and tell them agian! Seriously. No backing down or making light of it.
You have the key part of this down already: you are 'letting' people do this. They aren't physic. They aren't just going to magically figure out that it bothers you and stop. They need to know, and know very very clearly, that it is a problem or else they have no reason to stop.
It's all on you dear. No one else is going to stand up for you. So take yourself seriously and make a serious statment. You don't need to pull them aside. Tell them they messed up right then and there when they do! If you've been clear with them and they still wont stop, don't just sit there and mope or argue with them, walk away from a stituation you don't like.
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The Question
14/f
I seem to have a problem, I always like guys that aren't available. Sometimes I fall hard, and then get really depressed because I know I can't have them.
A few times in the past, boys I've liked have asked me out, and before I've had time to think about it, I've said no. And after I think, what did I do that for?
And boys I've liked have chatted me up at parties and I've got away from them quickly. And I always regret it.
Now, I've been in love with this boy for the past 4 months. And he really is the most amazing boy I've ever met. He seemed to be in a really serious relationship with his girlfriend and I'd cry all the time because of it.
A few days ago he told me he likes me as more than a friend, and I was ecstatically happy. Although I didn't think anything would happen for quite a long time because of his relationship with his girlfriend.
But then he said he's not sure what's going on with them at the moment, and recently has been talking about breaking up with her, although he's not sure. And his best mate keeps making comments that make it sound as if it's because he wants to be with someone else.
And suddenly I feel like I'm in a panic, and I don't feel as happy and I feel quite worried.
And I don't know why, I mean, I've wanted this for months now, right?
Yet I can't help it, it seems as soon as someone starts to like me, I pull away.
Do you have any idea why I do this? Is it to do with commitment? And how can I stop it?
Thanks in advance, sorry it was long, xxx
The Answer
Shesh babe! You are fourteen years old. You are young, inexperienced and learning about relationships with guys.
You don't have 'commitment issues'. You are just a bit nervous because you have no idea what commitment means yet! It's the unknown that scares you.
That means liking taken guys is safe. It's easy to like someone who you never admit it too and who you could never have. That isn't scary. It takes no work at all!
But when someone likes you back, well, that takes a bit of work doesn't it? You feel like you suddenly owe them something. You have to think about what you are going to say and do.
Just realize it's only the fear talking. Being afraid is okay, and normal and natural in something new. You'll probably be a bit afraid at the beginning of every new relationship you start! You just need to take a deep breath and get over it so that you can move past that awkward and scared stage and realize it isn’t so bad after all.
Stop worrying about things you can't control, and lean back and wait for them to unfold. Deal with the actually problem when and if an actual problem comes up! Right now there is no problem. You just have to wait and see where things go.
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