Razhie


"This is the true joy in life - being used for a purpose recognized by yourself as a mighty one; being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; being a force of nature instead of a feverish selfish little clod of ailments and grievances." --George Bernard Shaw

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My official name is Manda, but I've been Razhie for almost as long. I'm a 28 year old woman who didn't use to be half as confident or brazen as she is now.

My advice is pretty good, not always perfect and rarely censored.

I can read what is written. I cannot read your mind.


Razhie. Advicenators Member Since: June 13, 2005. Answers: 5077. Visitors: 211514.

Favourite Collumnists. (WittyUsernameHere.) (karenR.) (NinjaNeer.) (rainbowcherrie.) (DangerNerd.)


    The Question
    f/16
    Last night. My boyfriend and I were alone together in his car. There was no one around at all. We moved to the back of his car and things got pretty heated up, but he knows not to try too much because I've told him that I'm not ready to take my pants off at all yet.
    But. He took my hand and put it down his pants.
    Since I like him... I wanted to at least try. But I just ended up pulling my hand out and getting really scared. I stopped him from doing anything else. We just stopped completely. I guess that was a bad thing. Because then we just sat there silent in the back of his car. He asked me what was wrong but I couldn't really explain anything. Wasn't it obvious? I guess he needed it spelled out for him. When I couldn't do that he got really upset.
    He ended up getting really pissed and not even talking to me and overreacting. He started pacing and then just told me to get in the car. At that point I was ready to cry.
    So he's driving me home, completely upset and frustrated. And he speeds and runs a red light. A cop pulls us over and he got a ticket.

    When I got home late my parents bitched at me and took away my cell phone.
    I tried to talk to my boyfriend about things but. He. I don't know. I feel like what he said to me was just.
    He told me that he's scared.
    I told him that I was upset still and his response was. Well I just got a ticket.. so...

    I guess I just. I wasn't ready for what he wanted me to do. I know he probably would have been cool with slowing down but I couldn't communicate and that made everything worse.

    Please tell me what you think about everything. Help me figure out what to say to him now, because I don't know how to tell him what I'm feeling. I don't feel like he'd even try to understand.

    Thanks.

    The Answer
    Summaries can be very helpful, so take look here at a quick summary of what happened:

    You had told your boyfriend in advance about your boundaries. (Perfect)
    You were uncomfortable in a situation where those pre-established boundaries were crossed. (Understandably)
    You stopped the situation. (Again, perfect.)
    You tried, but had some difficulty expresses why you were uncomfortable. (Normal, these things are tough to explain.)

    He crossed the boundaries you thought you'd explained to him (How Rude!)
    He grew impatient and frustrated with you because you were uncomfortable with him crossing your boundaries. (Dumby, of course she doesn't want you doing what she asked you not too!)
    He grew unreasonably upset, would not accept your lack of a 'perfect' explanation for your choice. (Not very caring of him)
    He decided to speed and run a red light. (Illegal, moronic and put you in danger!)

    And now you feel like you owe him some sort of apology? That you need to work hard to earn him back because you had a struggle communicating 'NO' to him? That you are somehow responsible for the fact he behaved like a rude, dumb, uncaring, moron and broke the law?

    You are not at fault here. You did your best. What he did was rude, dumb, uncaring and moronic.

    You said 'no'. You never need to have a perfect reason for that. ‘I don’t want too’ IS the prefect explanation and the only thing you are required to communicate.

    He was out of line. In your position, I would seriously reconsider if I wanted to be in a relationship where someone puts my life in danger by running a red just because he was frustrated.

    At the very least, expect an apology from him. He might have gotten a ticket and not gotten the sexual contact he wanted, but you got frightened, shamed and terrified.

    If you think he won't even attempt to understand those feelings, or how unfairly he treated you, I hope you'll have the strength to call it off with this guy and find someone with some common decency and sense.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    I'm 23 years old and I've never worn make up. I use a little lip gloss here and there, but that really isn't considered 'makeup'. My mom never wore it and I guess I just wasn't interested in it. I am now. I don't even know where to begin! Any help would be appreciated!!

    The Answer
    Get a consultation.

    I know that sounds a bit extreme, but the truth is that makeup is different for each person. They want different things and use it differently. Make an appointment with a professional, they can teach you how to apply things properly and what will give you what you want. You don't need to buy everything they suggest of course. Buy one or two decent lipsticks and pick up the drugstore equivalent of everything else.

    When me and my sisters were young and first showed an interest in makeup my mother whisked us off right away to a stylist friend of hers. At the time I thought it was a little silly, but I've used the techniques she taught me to this day, I've shared them with others, and I've cringed when I saw some of my friends make beginner mistakes.

    So start asking around for a good beautician and treat yourself to hour or so in their company.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    I've only had one boyfriend, so he is the only one who has ever touched me down there...and I'm wondering if he's doing it right because sometimes it kinda hurts. He uses one of his fingers and goes in and out and sometimes I guess his nail scratches the inside of me or something. Also he pushes it in really far and hard, which kind of hurts too. So I guess it doesn't feel as good as I think it should.

    But yeah, I haven't had much experience, so...what is supposed to happen when that sort of thing goes on?

    The Answer
    Forget about what is 'supposed to happen'. If someone is hurting you then they are doing it wrong for you. Tell them to stop. If they don't, knee them in the groin.

    I'm only somewhat joking.

    To answer your question straight up: It is not supposed to hurt and yes, he is doing it poorly.

    The key to good sex, of any kind, is communication. You need to tell him gently that he is hurting you, tell him what feels good and make him listen. He might be a bit hurt and bashful but you are doing him a favor and helping him improve. People aren't born knowing how to sexually pleasure others, it's something they must learn. Be sensetive to his feelings, but make sure your point is clear and specific. If you must, take his hand and show him what does, and doesn't, feel good.

    It takes many a guys a long time to learn that when it comes to female pleasure, less is often more. If your guy can't learn, and keeps hurting you, don't let him touch you until he listens and respects your imput. Don't just put up and shut up when it comes to pain.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    13/f

    my boyfriend has been talking about having sex in the summer, but....thats a BIG step, and i dont know if i should or not. ive been trying to figure out what the worse that can happen is...and if we use a condom...i dont think i could get pregnant.

    The Answer
    You aren't ready to have sex if you 'don't think you could get pregnant'.

    Pregancy is ALWAYS a risk with sex. Always. Even a condom and birth control and a little anti-fertility voodoo doll cannot make pregacy impossible. You need to be mature enough to accept and awknowlegdge that risk.

    And of course STDS... but here is the big risk people never talk about: A broken heart.

    Trusting someone is always a risk. Being in a relationship is always a risk. Being in a sexual relationship is the biggest risk of all to your emotions and self esteem.

    I am not someone who think sexs should be saved exclusively for marriage, but it should be saved for two people who can respect one another completely, take responsbilty for thier actions and be completely truthful with one another.

    Anything less is asking for wounds that will haunt you for the rest of your life. Don't step into this lightly or with delusions and don't step into with someone who will walk away in six months. Most teens aren't ready for sex because they don't have the maturity and experience to take care of thier patner in a respectful and honest way. Watch out for yourself.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    i'm 15/f/nj is it legal to have sex with a 19 year old guy i know 16 is the age of consent but isnt' there something about if it's with in a certin number of years and your like 14 then its ok

    The Answer
    In most states a nineteen year old who slept with a fifteen year-old could be charged with statutory rape.

    If you are over thirteen but under sixteen you can generally sleep with someone less than four years older than you. A nineteen year old is four years older then you, so it's not okay.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    Is it illegal for people in Pennsylvania to have sex if they're both under 18 (both 15).

    The Answer
    It's legal for two fifteen year olds to have sex in Pennsylvania.

    Sex is only illegal with someone under the age of sixteen but over the age of thirteen if the other patner is four or more years older then them.

    Mind you, just because it's not illegal doesn't make it a good idea.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    16 f

    there is this kid that i know. he will NOT stop touching me. he's had a crush on me for the longest time, and wont leave me alone. he's really gross and perverted...and just an idiot overall..I hate him. I dont know what to do to stop him. I've hit him before..but he continues touching and squeezing me. I tell him stop like everyday, and he would say something along the lines of, "but I thought you loved me" or "dont you love me anymore"
    It's like freaking RAPE, I swear! I'm scared he'll rape me one day =(

    what can I do to freak him out? :|

    The Answer
    Talk to a principal.

    What he is doing is assualt and he needs to know that and be made to stop. Take it right to the top of the food chain and speak to your vice principal or pricipal (whoever is responsible for disicpline at your school).

    Be clear that he wont stop touching and squezzing you despite being told not too.

    Talk to your parents as well and if your principal isn't helpful, have them call the schoolboard. If that doesn't work, call the cops and be prepared to file charges as nessicary.

    If it happens agian, either before or after you've spoken to someone, say VERY LOUDLY "[His Name] do not touch me! I don't want you to touch me. I am going to go get help right now if you touch me." and if he does GO GET SOMEONE right then, a teacher or any school staff who can help you. You need to treat this as the abuse that it is. Get the help of an adult.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    yesterday i was at my boyfriend's house and i had a really bad headache so i fell asleep. when i woke up my hand was like on his penis and i pulled it out realy quick and he acted really scared. he was like, were you awake? i said no then he said oh yea me neither i was dead asleep. but i know he wasn't... after i made a comment he said i put my hand down his pants when we were sleeping, like i just stretched out and boom, there it was, but he was wearing elastic pants and tight underwear there is no way i could have done that in my sleep. I feel really uncomfortable around him now because we have never done anything sexually really and he always said it didn't bother him. What should I do? I wasn't awake the whole time so I don't want to confront him accusing him. Should I just forget about it?

    The Answer
    There is no logical conclusion but that he put your hand there. You are perfectly justified in accussing him and explaining to him clearly that what he did was sexual assualt.

    As judgemental and sexist as it sounds, rather then training women to be fearful and protect themselves against unwanted sexual advances, what our society really needs to be doing is teaching young men what is inappropraite.

    If you think he is a basically good guy, assume that his behavoir came out of curiosity, ignorance and immaturity, not an active desire to abuse you. You will do the world, and your relationship, a lot of good by firmly educating him about how that behavoir makes you feel and how inapropraite it is.

    It is assualt and it is abusive. Don't shy away from those words when you explain this too him. It's vital he understands.

    You should also mention to him that he is now on his second chance, if something like this happens agian he is no longer ignorant, he is an asshole and you need to dump him.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    So I just recently quit work at a Japanese restaurant where I met the new bus boy.

    He’s very nice, really. But he’s decided that he’s madly in love with me.

    It was nice having someone to talk to while I was working, but he’s one of those guys you can have as a friend at work, but don’t really hang out with anywhere else, you know?

    So, he asked me to go to lunch with him and some other guys from work. I was like, that doesn’t sound too bad. So I gave him my number (maybe a mistake?) and he never got around to calling me. Okay.

    So… he called me right before I left school for the holidays, twice, both times asking what I was doing the next day. “I’m leaving tonight,” I said both times.

    He called me a little into winter break to ask for my permission to go to a party. This seems a little weird to me. He calls me again later that week, to ask about another party. “You don’t have to ask for my permission. You can do whatever you want.”

    I stopped answering his calls after awhile, and then he stopped calling. Then about a week later, I get two texts from him saying “I love you”. Now I’m starting to get really sketched out.

    I got a voicemail from him not but two days ago, along the lines of “Hey, baby, I was just calling to apologize for not having talked to you in awhile. I dropped my phone in the toilet and had to get a new battery. I wanted to wish you a happy new year and everything. I love you, bye.”

    I really, really did not feel like calling him back, so I settled for texting him:

    'So, I’m off the schedule now at the restaurant, but I guess I’ll see you as a customer. You know I just like you as a friend, right? Happy new year.'

    He called me just now. Just 10 minutes ago to ask me to accompany him to his parents’ house. In two years. Because apparently he called them and told them all about me and they think I sound like a nice girl and would like to meet me.

    I have known this guy only since November.

    “I don’t know what I’ll be doing in two years,” I protest. I'm thinking of studying abroad, but I don't bother to tell him this.

    THEN. He asks me to marry him. In two years.

    I am absolutely speechless. SPEECHLESS. “I—” I stammer, “two years is—that’s quite a—you know I just like you as a friend right?”

    “But we can still keep in touch,” he insists, “and get to know each other more better.”

    More better. I’m not even kidding you. …He got expelled from high school by throwing a chair at his principal.

    I can’t help but feel like I am partly responsible for the situation I have put myself in. It’s just, you know, most people that I know are, well, normal.

    And in college. Or have graduated from college. Or have aspirations to go to college.

    Note to self: guard cell phone number with my very life!

    I'm incredibly concerned, and could use a little advice. :(

    The Answer
    Take deep breath, and stop taking his calls or responding to his texts, in ANY WAY AT ALL.

    Talk to your parents and/or roommates, don, floor rep, whatever. The people you live with. They will help keep you safe, be there for you and provide witnesses and legal support if thie escalates.

    If you choose too, you could call him one time and tell him this "Your calls/texts are making me uncomfortable and I'm not going to accept them any more." Be mean if you must. Tell him he has made you too uncomfortable for you too be his friend and he has not listened to you when you said no to his requests. Ask a friend to witness this conversation as well.

    At this point, don't freak yourself out too much. Protect yourself by making sure the people around you know what is going on and by ending all communication with him. The idea at this point is to be in the best situation you can be *if* it escalates.

    He sounds like he isn't operating with all of his senses intacted... He is also probably harmless and if you stop being nice (being a bit rude is worth it to feel safe) he will drift away.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    Not sure if this is the right category but my questions is, DO i have trust issues?

    Everytime i am in a relationship i always think the guy is trying to get in my pants. I always think he is just saying he loves me because all he wants from me is to get in my pants. i always think he says he loves me becasue of things we do (not sex). Everytimg he says how much he want to be with me and hug me and stuff, i always think he is trying to get in my pants and just saying that stuff to suck up to me and butter me up. I always think he is lying to me.

    So what do i do, i try not to belive it but he has had like 30 GF's and has had sex soooo many times. I am so confused. How do i get over this?
    what do i do? how do i trust, if i have issues?

    The Answer
    Do you have a trust issue here OR do you have a boyfriend issue here?

    Do you ALWAYS suspect a guy of being after only one thing OR do you suspect THIS GUY of being after only one thing because of his history with girls.

    Listen to your gut when it comes to each guy you meet. If something inside you says that you can't trust this guy or even that you two just don't want the same thing from the relationship, that is an okay reason to break it off. If your gut tells you that you are being irrational and this is a good guy for you, talk it out with your boyfriend. Having him know where you are coming from will help him lay off the behavoir you find iffy and talking to him will help you know you really do have a good guy.

    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    I'm converting to Judaism. Yes, I know it's a very rigorous process. Yes, I know I won't be accepted by some branches of Judaism. I have done all of the research, I'm planning on talking with a rabbi in my area soon and start conversion classes. It's what is right for me, I know it. The only problem is that I'm afraid to tell my family and friends. My parents themselves are not religious at all. They celebrate Christian holidays because my mother was raised Catholic and my father was raised Orthodox, but neither one of them ever raised my siblings and me in a certain religion. My mother's stepmom is even Jewish, as is my dad's brother-in-law. I know that this is what I need to do, what will make me feel whole. I've always felt a part of the Jewish community, even when I was younger, I just don't know how to tell my family this. I tried to bring it up with my older brother and he didn't really understand. He asked me, "Why do you need some sort of organized religion? Why can't you just believe what you believe?". Being the youngest, they don't always take me seriously. My mom really loves celebrating the holidays too and I don't really know how she'll react. What should I do to let them know?

    The Answer
    Well, you need to tell them, openly and honestly. You can certainly do it one at a time if that will make it easier, but I think it's very, very important that you are clear with your parents about your choice to practice Judaism. As you are still a teenager you will likely need their support to be able to practice the restrictions and observances.

    The thing that will help this conversation go smoothly is if you can anticipate and provide answers to their most pressing questions. A rabbi may be able to help you guess what these questions will be, but you can probably guess a few of them yourself. The big question of course will be “Why?” but also important are things like "Does this mean you'll refuse to celebrate Christmas with us?" or "Does this mean you wont eat the food I prepare for you?" are questions that will be important to your parents. You need to understand that you are in fact asking a great deal of them if you expect them not only to accept your belief but also to assist you in abiding by them. Many parents would find that latter expectation to be a bit much. Living in a household with more then one religious observance (I grew up in one with three. Four, if you count different types of Christianity) can be difficult and it requires an open mind and flexibility, from you as well as them.

    Ease them into it now by talking to them about your interest in Judaism. That will prepare them a bit better and make it less of a surprise. Then talk to a rabbi to get some information and guidance on how to discuss your intention to convert.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    my friend told me if you like a gay guy youre considered a lesbian, is this true?

    The Answer
    No, of course not. That is just plain silly.

    A gay man is a self-identified male who is attracted to other males.

    A lesbian is a self-identified female who is attracted to other females.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    Please, only answer these questions if you really know about them. And just answer the question, don't try to persuade me into a different direction.

    1. What are the best over-the-counter appetite suppressants?
    2. What is better: Walking a mile, or doing 200 sit ups?
    3. Can cigarettes really suppress your appetite?

    The Answer
    1.) None are the best. As other advisors have told you, they can put at risk for immediate heart problems, what these advisors didn't tell you is that if you are a teen, they might also stunt your hearts development, exposing you to extreme risks for the rest of your lifetime. As one other advisor mentioned, the very best over-the-counter ‘appetite suppressant’ is in fact water or juice, as most people eat when they are in fact not hungry, but thirty and will find the hunger passes if they drink more.

    2.) Depends what you want. If you want to loose weight, walk, or if you can, take a light jog. If you want to tone your muscles, do sits ups. A combination of both will give the best results.

    3.) Smoking is a stimulant, and makes your body work harder, for less oxygen, therefore burning more calories. Of course, it would be quicker, cheaper and far more effective to take a 30 minute light jog then to light up. Jogging also doesn’t cause cancer…

    There really aren’t any short cut to weight loss that don’t put your health at risk. Just do whatever had to do, walk, run, tone, eat less junk, don’t eat when you aren’t hungry and if that fails you, consult a doctor.

    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    About 4 years ago, my 7 year old brother nearly cut one of his toe's off on our porcelein bathroom drawer knob because it had broken off before and had only been glued back on, so they broke really easy when he stood on them to reach the basin. We're renting this house so it was the real estates duty to have this fixed, and seeing as they hadn't, my brother had to have surgery and stiches on his toe. Do we have grounds to sue?

    The Answer
    You might have been able too sue to have your brother's medical costs covered, but likely not anymore.

    The statute of limitations on most personal injury cases is 3 years. But these laws are complex, have many exceptions and differ state by state so the only one you can give you a definite answer to that question is a lawyer.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    Lately my gf has been telling me about these dreams she has about other guys forcing her to hook up with them and she told me that "you shouldn't struggle, you should just go along with it". She also sort of admitted that this is a fantasy of hers. What I'm wondering is, if someone started kissing her and she kissed him back, wouldn't that be cheating regardless of how the kissing started? Couldn't she just use being forced as an excuse, especially if its a fantasy of hers? In my opinion, if someone holds her and starts kissing her, she should push him away rather than kiss him back. We are in a committed relationship by the way.

    The Answer
    There are a whole bunch of 'ifs' in your question love, and frankly, I think you are missing the point of her sharing this with you.

    She, like MANY women, has fantasies of nonconsensual/reluctant sexual activity or 'rape'. It is an EXTREMELY common fantasy that isn't about cheating or variety, it's about feeling just that damn attractive and about not being responsible for what happens (because society teaches women that they can't be 'responsible' or 'good girls' and still want sex, many of us struggle with how to express our desires. these fantasies seem solve that problem for women).

    Your girlfriend is probably not telling you she wants to cheat. She might be telling you the exact opposite. She might be telling you that she wants to be open, honest and accepted by you about all things, including her kinks.

    Ask her what she wants to DO about these fantasies. I bet it includes you, not these dream guys.

    One last thing: NEVER, EVER accuse a woman of using force as an excuse. Please. That sort of thing is the reason so many rapes go unreported. People say things like “Well, she was really asking for it” or “It seemed like she was into him” or “I bet she liked it.” Those sort of thoughts are dangerous and cruel. If a woman says she was forced, please believe her. Even if she wasn’t forced frankly, if you care about someone, trust them and run the risk that she is making a fool of you RATHER then disbelieving her and victimizing and shaming her all over again.

    If you can’t trust a girl not to cheat, don’t be with her. If you can trust her enough to be with her, you damn well better trust her if she comes to you with news like sexual assault or rape.

    ALSO: Please show your girlfriend these links. I think it’s important that she understands, despite her fantasies, that it is in fact wise of a women to fight sexual assault. The statistics are there: fighting back is a valid option, does not put the women in any greater danger than they are already in and can be effective in stopping an attacker.
    http://www.trccmwar.ca/fight-back.html#myths
    http://www.fightsafe.com/W-Tips-rev.pdf
    http://www.womentraveltips.com/tips5.shtml
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    Hello. I am 21 and male.

    I met someone online, and we have been pretty good friends for a while now. We do not want to date or anything, because both of us are married... just friends. I just want to get that out there...

    Recently, I have made a series of stupid mistakes and hurt her feelings pretty badly. I suffer from Bipolar Disorder, and am currently seeking help for it. I want her to forgive me for the things I have done, but I'm not sure how. I told her about the disorder before the fight.

    I have tried apologizing to her, but I'm not sure if she forgives me or not. She will not talk to me, and only minimal responses are given when I initiate conversations with her.

    I really enjoyed being friends with her. She was a good listener, a good source of advice, and really fun to be around. I feel terrible about how I treated her, and I want to make it up.

    Is there any way I can mend this friendship, or should I just forget about it and move on?

    The Answer
    Keep doing what you are doing, and give her to time to decide what she is comfortable with.

    She might forgive you or have already forgiven you, but decided she simply can't handle the risk that you might behave that way agian.

    If you are suffering from a mood disorder this is something you really need to come to terms with: Some people just don't have it inside of themselves to be your friend.

    It doesn't make them bad people, but it does make them honest when the scale back thier communication with you. In wanting to be her 'friend' you might be asking for more than she feels she has to give.

    Be respectful, be consistant and enjoy your brief conversations without pushing for more. If she realizes you aren't leaning heavily on her for support or asking for more intamacy or effort from her then she feels she can offer, she might come back around. The key is patience and a willingness to allow the friendship to progress according to her wishes, not yours.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    im about to be 16 my voice has changed and everything and puberty is hitting me hard...how do i get my dick to grow??

    The Answer
    You can't.

    You can't change the size of your penis anymore then you can change the colour of your skin. It is genetics. There are a number of pills and treatments out there that claim to effect the size of your penis, but they are scams.

    If you fear something in wrong, see a doctor, but if you just want to be bigger, you are outta luck.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    Alright well , my friend wants to know if having sex at the age of 15 is ok.. but if she knows shes in love with them and she knows shes loved by him..What do you think?
    Thank you , betty

    The Answer
    There is never a 'know'. Only a 'hope'.

    You can hope that they love you. You can hope everything will work out okay and that they will respect you and you will respect them. You can hope your ‘love’ wont be thwarted or crumble and die.

    You can never know.

    You can never really, truly 'know' another person or what will happen tomorrow. Being in a relationship is always a risk. Being in a sexual relationship is an even bigger risk.

    In my opinion, it's an unnecessary risk for a teenager to take.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    My question is a little strange. I do not currently have a cold and these do wonders to help me get to sleep. Do you think that would be bad? Like, if I keep using them would that decrease the effects for me when I actually do have a cold? I don't think there's a risk of dependency like with sleep aids. They get the job done well within an hour. It's not really medicine and it helps me get dizzy because I do not have another alternative to getting to sleep. Thanks in advance!

    http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51kZe-BNd-L._AA280_PIbundle-3,TopRight,0,0_AA280_SH20_.jpg

    The Answer
    With almost all sedatives, there is a risk of dependency. Just because a medication is not chemically addictive doesn't mean you can't become an addict.

    If you are having trouble sleeping, you should see a doctor, get checked out physically and discuss lifestyle changes first and foremost.

    Taking them regularly will not decrease their effectiveness when you have a cold, but it will likely decrease their effectiveness at putting you to sleep. You will eventually find yourself unable to sleep without a large dose. You will have trained your body not to fall asleep any other way.

    Drugging yourself to sleep a few times a year is not wise, but doing it on a regular basis speaks to a much larger health problem and is the behavior of an addict.

    Don't self medicate. Some people self-medicate with booze or weed or other illegal drugs (I cannot count the number of people I know who can't sleep without smoking a joint), others self medicate with over the counter drugs. Either way, it's not a good idea. See a doctor.
    (View All Other Answers.)



    The Question
    what is the chance you could get pregnant if you have sex with a boy who is not wearing a condom but you are on birth control

    The Answer
    Birth control is reported to be between 95% and 99.7% effective.

    There is always a risk, but if you use contraception correctly, you can reduce that risk.

    Of course, you are still exposed to STDs unless you use a condom.
    (View All Other Answers.)



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