christina's advice column | Page 21

home view feedback ask questions add as friend advicenators

Website:

Gender:

Female

Location:

716

Occupation:

SAHM

Age:

27

Member Since:

February 1, 2006

Answers:

6717

Last Update:

August 9, 2018

Visitors:

288956

Favorite Columnists

Main Categories:

about

I'm Christina, and I'm 27. I tend to be brutally honest when I give advice or an opinion. I don't tell people what they want to hear but rather what they need to hear. They don't always appreciate it at first, but I usually get a thank you in the end.

I have 15 tattoos, and 8 piercings. I'm married and just gave birth to a baby boy in May. I'm currently a SAHM so you can find me taking care of my son and binge-watching television while he naps.

advice

my mom tends to focus her attention on my brother
who is a 2nd year univ student but still acts like a kid
its always been like that, and its bothering me more and more.

my mom and ive always been really close
and ive done whatever i could to try to make her as happy as possible because she's just been through so much
im always looking out for her needs;
simply cus i love her to death

its just that she seems to not notice any of the things i do for her but instead lets her anger out on me all the time.

if she's in a bad mood, she would let it out on me
and never my brother who doesn't even acknowledges us as his family anymore

if my brother were to do one hundredth of what I do for her, she'd be beaming
but no matter how much I do, it just doens't seem to matter to her at all.

i know im coming off very dramatic, stupid, and desperate for attention. but i'm not trying to be the model daughter for things in return; i'm trying to be the model daughter for my mom to be a little more happy and not be yelled at for it.

i dont know how to act anymore around mom, i love doing things for her but lately i just don't see the point anymore if she's gonna yell at me all the time.

i've experienced this for my entire life and lately i'm growing sick of it.

I don't think you're seeing this the right way.

What immediately popped out at me when reading your question was this:

"if my brother were to do one hundredth of what I do for her, she'd be beaming"

That's the problem. Your mother loves you, and she still feels very close with you (despite how she's been showing it). BUT, what she really wants isn't from you. She wants your brother to grow up, and to do something nice for someone other than himself. From what you've described, he seems a little selfish. And I'm sure your mother would love it if his behavior changed.

I'm certain she appreciates all that you do for her, but she probably would just love it if your brother were a little more like you. I say keep doing what you're doing, but maybe have a talk with your brother & see if he can do at least one thing for your mom.

i have just come back from a leadership conference
and realized just how much our school lacked of spirit.

our school is famous to be known as the academic school; everyone is so determined to get into an ivy league and be the next bill gates. so school basically means just homework, tests and quizzes.

i want our school to be something more than that, a place people are happy to come to ever morning and i think the biggest thing we need is spirit.

at the leadership conference, we have done many cheers and people went absolutely nuts. i loved it. how should i bring about that spirit into our school?

I definitely suggest bringing this up to the principal. Tell him/her how you feel about this & see what you guys can come up with to change it.

Spirit week is pretty famous in a lot of schools. It's usually before the Homecoming Football game. Some schools even have Homecoming dances (which can be formal or informal, that's up to you).

It's always really fun to participate in. Bring it up to the principal & see what they say. I'm sure you could work this in to your school.

last night i was in my room after school and I started to masterbate. I don't masturbate too often so I guess I didn't think about locking my door. Well, my mom walked in on me! She left pretty quickly but I don't want to just leave it at that. At dinner she was pretty quiet and didn't seem too happy. I know I should say something to her, right? What do I say? Or do I just let this blow over?

She's probably just embarrassed. She didn't think about knocking & really didn't expect to catch you masturbating. You can say something if you like. Maybe apologize & say that you'll lock the door from now on if you're going to be involved in personal things with yourself.

She's not mad at you though. And if she is, she shouldn't be. Masturbation is really very healthy & nothing to be frowned upon. :) Everyone does it & anyone who says they don't is more than likely lying.

But hey, at least she'll knock from now on. :)

What do i wear with light grey skiny jeans? they're bongo brand and they are a really light grey. I have no idea what colours go with them. Please help!
XXXOOO
Lonley_girl

Pink & Black tend to go good with grey.

Is it ok to hide things in vagina? I feel stupid asking this but I have something I want to put up there but i am afraid it will go up into my body where i can't reach it anymore so is it possible to hide things in (up) your vagina or not? No it is not drugs!

THANK YOU!!!

It's possible, but not recommended. You could get an infection, or there's a really good chance it'll get stuck. If you decide to do this & it does happen to get stuck, have fun explaining to the doctor why you're in that situation.

I'm a female.
5'6"
118 lbs
My shoe size is a 7.

Thanks!

This is something they would tell you at the store where you'd buy it from.

So do you guys think the girl and the guy (in the blue sweater) hooked up or did something shady that night at the halloween party?! Or do they just look plain drunk. Do you think something happened between them that night? Ha loads of questions.

Photo: http://s844.photobucket.com/albums/ab4/lexiegoesrawr/?action=view¤t=39.jpg

Photo 2) http://s844.photobucket.com/albums/ab4/lexiegoesrawr/?action=view¤t=328.jpg

Pictures will never be able to tell you if someone hooked up or not. To me, they just look like friends who are drunk together.

They may have hooked up & they may not have. Whether they did or not is none of your business though.

Okay, well I have this teacher who's is just amazing. She was my teacher last year and she's my teacher again this year. Anyways, she is one of the few people who actually believe in me.

I know that Christmas is a long time from now, but it's more time to find something for her. My question is, what can I get her?

Here's some information about her:
She's from New York, she's an english teacher, she likes to travel, she's a grandmother and a mother, she's really funny, she's in her mid 60's, she loves anything extravagant, and she's a total hippie.

What can I get her as a christmas present? Please keep it cheap. I don't have much money to spend. Anything under 20 dollars would be nice.

Thanks in advance!!

Why not get her a book? She is an English teacher after all. I'm sure if you ask her what her favorite book is, she'd tell you. Then maybe ask her if she has it. If not, then buy her that. She'd love it.

My dad watches porn.... I know, like how creepy right? he is like old. what do old people want porn for? he is like 35!!

I found his porn and i have been looking at my dads porn. i think it is so gross that he watches porn when he is soooo old why is that? why is it ok for me but not for him?

17/f

It is certainly okay for your father to watch porn. Humans have certain needs and when they can't be fulfilled by another human, that's where porn comes in. He can do whatever he wants. He is an adult, and he doesn't need your permission to watch pornography. It's also none of your business that he has it. He's only human.

If you dislike it, that's too bad. You can't tell him what to do, but you can surely tell him that you found it & would appreciate it if he didn't leave it lying around for you to see. You need to get over it though. And stop watching it. You're too young to watch porn. And by the way, 35 isn't old.

15/f

I have a funeral coming up and I dont have anything to wear. Does anyone know where I can get a black dress for a funeral?

Wet Seal.
Forever 21.
Rue 21.

You could also try Macy's or Target.

Where can I watch New Moon Online for free and no surveys?

You can't right now. The movie hasn't come out yet so there's no way for you to watch it. It comes out November 20th, so you only have to wait a few more weeks.

I'd just see it in theatres. Don't be cheap.

or with Elite and Wilhelmina modeling agencies?
Iam 5'11
how much should i weigh?
whats the pay like
and what are the jobs like?

http://www.elitemodel.com/bediscovered.aspx?city=NY

It shows what they're interested in, and if you qualify, I'm guessing they'll contact you.

So i met a guy named josh through a friend and i have hung out with him a couple times. Last night i hung with him at a party and we kissed for the first time. How can I tell if he is really into me or just using me?
He introduced me to all his friends.
Asked to drive me, mentions future times to hang out.
Did not go further than hooking up.
Held my hand everywhere we walked and talked and noticed my own frineds.
Kissed me goodbye =]

It doesn't seem to me like he dislikes you. If anything, he seems like he genuinely cares for you. :)

One time I showed a friend a picture of me and she said "You look like a fruit in that one". What does that mean?

Depending on the context used, the word fruit can mean lots of things. It can mean silly, gay (but not as in homosexual) or it can be the literal meaning of an actual fruit.

If it's a bad picture of you, then she's letting you know that it isn't flattering.

I have another question for you.

Today when I went to the bathroom I spotted blood with the discharge. Could it be that my hymen has been broken when my bf fingered me?? He fingered me last tuesday and today is thursday, could it be that or could I be pregnant?? :S

It could be that your hymen is broken but didn't bleed until now for some reason. It also could be the start of a period (if you're still irregular). If your boyfriend only fingered you that day, I doubt that there's a chance you'll be pregnant.

i feel very suicidal. i want to end my life. everything i do is wrong, no one in my family loves me they all putt me down either im stupid or ugly or everything is wrong with me. i cant do anything right what is there for me to live for

Don't end your life.

You may not feel loved, but your family does love you. They have a poor way of showing it, but they do love you so please don't think that they don't.

I can guarantee that your problems will go away. Your life will only suck if you allow it to. Don't let small things upset you or ruin your day. Do your best to succeed & even if you fail, try again. You have lots of reasons to live. Do not let temporary problems stop you from being happy.

Every problem is temporary & has a solution. Death is permanent & you can't get your life back. I suggest you see a counselor. Talking your problems out will help.

alright im a 16 year old female. I am curretnly on a birth control pill for my cramps. I was on my sugar pills this week. Today i went to visit a friend at his house and things got a little more than friendly. I ended up having sex with him, twice It was my first time and it was unprotected. I know it was hugly iresponsable but it was one of those thing that just happend and then later your going oh my god i cant belive that i did that. He did pull out both times but im still worried. I am on my period also. Great combination i know. like I said it just happened. I am worried that he might have gotten me pregnant. I was just wondering what are the chances now?

Honestly? About an 8-10% chance. Birth control is not 99% effective so although the chances of you getting pregnant are slim, it's still very possible. You must remember that the pull-out method is not an effective form of birth control because there is always pre-cum.

Next time you have sex, I suggest you use protection (birth control pills, & condoms) to lessen your chances of pregnancy. If you're scared that you may be pregnant, grab a test from the drug store.

I have 2 questions to ask you.

1.) I have 2 ulcers on the inside of my upper lip. My bf told me that they came out because of kissing, is it true that if you frenchkiss you can have ulcers? (he doesn't have ulcers in his mouth, so they couldn't be spread from his mouth).

2.) Yesterday my bf fingered me for the first time. He was with the clothes on and he didn't touch his penis, so he couldn't have sperm on his fingers right? His nails were a bit long and he hurt me and also he didn't wash his hands before!!

Next time i'll tell him to cut his nails and wash his hands. What do you think? He only did it once!

I've never heard of anyone ever getting an ulcer from kissing. Oral sex maybe but not kissing. I think what you have is a canker sore. They're white & small. They're pretty painful & sting when you're eating ketchup, salt, or other tangy foods.

Because your boyfriend didn't wash his hands before he fingered you, the chances of you getting an infection inside your vagina are high. He should always wash his hands because it's just good hygiene & stuff like that can be prevented. If his nails were long, he may have just scratched you a bit. If you experience any burning sensations while peeing or if you have to use the bathroom a lot, you may have an infection so I would definitely check out a doctor.

Hit up Rite-Aid or Walgreens or whatever for canker sore medicine. And again, if you feel a burning sensation or have frequent urination, hurry & see a doctor because you may have an infection. Have him wash his hands next time he touches you intimately.

i think thats what its called ,but whats guys opinions on girls with the trail not just completely shaved? and whats so good about it ,because my guy friends say its hot ,but i dont get there point of it .

Girls aren't supposed to have happy trails, guys are. A happy trail is the line of hair that leads down from the bellybutton & goes down to the pubic hair. As to why a girl would have one, I'm unsure. Only boys are supposed to have those.

Shave it.

15/f
so i met these 2 guys at the gym and they asked me to hang out and i said okay so i hung out with them last night. my friend supposedly has met them before at a party though and one of them tried to rape her and stuff but she got away, but i went anyway because im not sure if thats completly true. so they are both 18 in college and we went to a pool and we did hookah and we were drinking vodka and they kept trying to get me to drink more (sketchy?) and two of us were really drunk and so we started making out and i barely remember anything all i know is that now im really really sore 'down there', but i vagualy remember him saying we werent going to do it because he didnt have a condom? but i dont think i would have been okay with doing that, i am/was a virgin and now i just feel really gross and i don't know what to do. they have a history of raping or trying to rape girls, so could he have done that to me and i just dont remember cause i was so drunk or was it just fingering? please help i don't know what to think or anything!!!

The chances that you were raped are extremely high considering the history that these two men have. They have tried or have raped girls in the past. Your friend warned you about them, but you went with them anyways. You knew better before you hung out with them, but decided not to listen. Now you see why you should have. I'm not going to lecture you though.

Anyways, chance are - you were raped. It would've been rape anyway because you were drunk & you wouldn't remember if it was consensual or not. They more than likely slipped something into your drink when you weren't looking. That drug is called a Rohypnol. It's used as a sedative, and is mainly known as the "Date Rape Drug."

I suggest you tell an adult. Tell your parents & go get yourself checked out by a doctor to make sure that you're not pregnant or that you have any STD's. You also need to call the police. These 2 men broke many laws when spending time with you. Smoking, underage drinking, attempting or committing rape, etc. You need to call the police ASAP though because rape is a serious matter, and also has evidence that wears off quickly. Call the cops & put these 2 behind bars where they belong.

<<< Previous Advice Column

Next Advice Column >>>